The Dream Is Over As FAA Grounds Nightmareliner

Tyler Durden's picture


The pain for Boeing never stops. Just out from Reuters:

  • U.S. FAA says requiring airlines to temporarily stop flying Boeing's 787 Dreamliner. #BREAKING
  • FAA: Battery failures on Boeing 787s could damage critical systems and structures, spark fire, if not corrected
  • FAA: Will work with Boeing, airlines to develop corrective action plan to resume 787 operations as "quickly and safely as possible"
  • FAA: Decision to ground Boeing 787s prompted by second incident involving lithium ion battery failure
  • FAA: Will also examine Boeing 787 batteries as part of comprehensive review announced last week

So, will Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood (i.e., the US government) perhaps reassess his conclusion from last week that the Dreamliner is "safe" or perhaps this too is just more teething problems... Or merely an ultra aggressive case of industrial sabotage from EADS? In other news, perhaps it is time to find a more appropriate name for the Dreamliner?

Finally we are surprised how nobody has figured out this simple and brilliant solution yet: put Solyndra solar panels on all Dreamliners and call it a day.

For those interest, here is more from Reuters:

The Federal Aviation Administration said on Wednesday it would temporarily ground Boeing Co's 787s after a second incident involving battery failures caused one of the Dreamliner passenger jets to make an emergency landing in Japan.


The FAA said airlines would have to demonstrate that the lithium ion batteries involved were safe before they could resume flying Boeing's newest commercial airliner, but gave no details on when that could occur.


Boeing could not be immediately reached for comment.

Perhaps if Boeing had been reached for comment, it would have said: 'Shouldn't the FAA have ascertained the safety of the lithium ion batteries before clearing our airplane for flight after years and years of delays?

The use of new battery technology is among the cost-saving features of the 787, which Boeing says burns 20 percent less fuel than rival jetliners using older technology.

"Burns" being a great example of using the right word at the right time.

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Wed, 01/16/2013 - 22:53 | 3160937 Matt
Matt's picture

P-51 took about 16 weeks to get the first prototype rolled out the door.

Pentagon took about 16 months to contruct.

F-35 is looking about 16 YEARS to develop.

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 01:18 | 3161285 Lucius Corneliu...
Lucius Cornelius Sulla's picture

Comparing a P-51 to a F-35?  Come on ... not even close!

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 01:56 | 3161339 Matt
Matt's picture

The technology has not advanced compareable to the complexity of the aircraft? Look at what they had to work with in 1941.

If this trend continues, the sixth generation fighter will take 30 years to make, and the seventh generation will take like 100 years.

As it is, the F-35 has been in development longer than both world wars, and will be in service for fewer years than in developement.

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 01:24 | 3161290 Lucius Corneliu...
Lucius Cornelius Sulla's picture

In the Skunk Works the engineers and machinists worked side by side building the parts as they were designed, tweaking them as needed.  Not so much with the 787.  The first major "global supply chain" aeronautical engineering project.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:31 | 3160432 Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

My guess woul be that Boeing has deviated sharply from the K.I.S.S. mantra.

Keep It Simple, Stupid

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 21:51 | 3160710 secret_sam
secret_sam's picture

Jack, puhleeze.  A Congressional inquiry will be convened as soon as one of these suckers takes out one of our remaining skyscrapers.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 21:53 | 3160725 Ident 7777 economy
Ident 7777 economy's picture




Jack Burton


" It beggars belief that after so many decades of commercial jet development and so many different aircraft in service for so long, that a new commercial jet can not be engineered and brought on line with minimal problems. ... "

Override of sound, engineering decisions by a management set on a) making deadlines b) cutting costs ... It's really quite simple ... remember Challenger? NASA? FAILED MGT DECISION?


Thu, 01/17/2013 - 08:45 | 3161665 Dieselclam
Dieselclam's picture


Wed, 01/16/2013 - 22:05 | 3160777 trav777
trav777's picture

this isn't like bringing a new item out on the dollar menu, cretin

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 01:13 | 3161243 Lucius Corneliu...
Lucius Cornelius Sulla's picture

I know a lot of Boeing engineers and machinists in the Commercial Airplanes Division and they all say the same thing, "It's the first airplance built by MBAs".  In other words, management tried to placate every government on the planet by outsourcing pieces of it all over the place in order to win sales and supposedly save money.  Furthermore, this is a truly revolutionary design both in the airframe and electronics.  So when you mix in a lot of new design and technology with MBAs that decide on where and how to build it for political reasons instead of keeping the engineers and machinists who speak the same language working within close proximity to each other, you have the mess they are in now.  Another great idea turned into a piece of shit by outsourcing!

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 01:23 | 3161292 Dugald
Dugald's picture

Nothing improves development like a large war.........but are you ready?

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 03:04 | 3161418 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

Outsourcing of manufacturing and design ... gotta love it ... and makes the US national economy so vibrant /snark

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:34 | 3160203 hairball48
hairball48's picture

I read that the "NightmareLiner" has Lithium Ion batteries made by a Japanese firm Yuasa.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:36 | 3160210 max2205
max2205's picture

Please fasten your seat belts and turn off all battery power devices.    


Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:48 | 3160270 knukles
knukles's picture

Your stew-bitch will be along to handcuff you to your seat shortly

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 02:23 | 3161381 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

They serve stew? 

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:36 | 3160213 Catflappo
Catflappo's picture

Boeing Boeing Gone...

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:38 | 3160223 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 The irony Jack, of this is that [Car manufactures are consuming (Al}) at alarming rates to fulfill MPG estimates before 2025.

  Composite cars burn, which is why race cars use light weight composite bodies,designed to break away.

 Look at the the 1978 porsche 928, Advertising material. (Aluminium was a selling point) .


  Composite airplanes don't do well with electricity,and heat!

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:41 | 3160235 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

My favorite Porsche.

Yes, I realize I'm in a tiny minority.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:51 | 3160285 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

A good minority ;-)

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:55 | 3160297 Citxmech
Citxmech's picture

The 928s are fine Grand Touring cars, but they're heavy.

My faves are the 1972 911S and '73 Carrera RS.  Mmmmm.  So light and nimble.

I had a '70 "S" model for a while - the thing weighed 2100lbs I think.  The performance was just unbelievable.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:10 | 3160355 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 I used the "928" as an example. It was the first front engined 'water cooled' Porsche production car .  I love ALL 911's.

 I had a "79" 930 Turbo, that would blow your ass off around the apex. You just had to stay on the gas and let it understeer into the next transition. (trailing throttle oversteer wasn't an option)

Fri, 01/18/2013 - 16:25 | 3167318 Citxmech
Citxmech's picture

No worries - The front-engined Porsche's are mostly excellent cars (924 notwithstanding).  I've heard that the 944 Turbo holds the factory stock lap record at the Nurbrugring.  Jealous about the 930T.  I always wanted to build a 911RSR replica out of one.  =]

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:50 | 3160283 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

No real substitute for metal.

The stainless steel DeLorean was genius.

Why can't this country make a DC-3 anymore?

As you say, goal-seeking fuel efficiency versus rugged reliability and safety.

So, now we will not only be X-Ray'ed and groped to get on the plane we will be Guinea Pigs for safety in the air.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 22:06 | 3160788 trav777
trav777's picture

I am convinced more than ever that this site is populated with COMPLETE fking idiots

The DC3??  WTF.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 22:33 | 3160884 Likstane
Likstane's picture

What's wrong with the DC-3?  It seems to have done pretty well for the last 70 years.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 22:51 | 3160928 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Now now trav777, look up the long storied history of the venerable DC-3 that lasted longer than the 727 or DC-10.

One of the most dependable aircraft ever made, like the P-51 Mustang.

Wherefore art our industrial ingenuity and craft?

Lost to the sands of time?

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:39 | 3160225 syntaxterror
syntaxterror's picture

If it's Boeing, you ain't going.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:46 | 3160261 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Composite materials and high power batteries instead of metal and fuel.


Thu, 01/17/2013 - 02:27 | 3161387 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Just like our cars. And everything else. Maybe they are supposed to be one use and disposable?

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:46 | 3160263 Dr Benway
Dr Benway's picture

Hey, it hasn't crashed and killed everyone on board yet.

So according to standard logic of today's nominally rising 'markets', that means it's safe and everyone should just buy.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:56 | 3160302 Dre4dwolf
Dre4dwolf's picture

Whats the big deal? slap a new battery in that puppy, double check the wiring and its good to go?


My friends father works on jet liners all the time, they just duct tape the shit out of all the broken parts and send them off.


You guys think its some kinda fancy pants mechanic working on your flight ? hahaha these guys just duct tape everything....... why? because thats how a man fixes things.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:58 | 3160524 Ima anal sphincter
Ima anal sphincter's picture

Well........ I'm a mechanic for a big purple-tailed overnight cargo company. I do avionics/electrical contract for corporates on the side. Duct tape is not even stocked. That actually was a pretty damn brainless statement. Do you have ANY clue what makes an aircraft tic? When you get off your next flight, thank a pilot, mechanic, and engineer for allowing you to do so.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 21:45 | 3160687 secret_sam
secret_sam's picture

      It's all ball-bearings these days, boy! 

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 03:08 | 3161421 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

I love the shape of the wings...

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 02:29 | 3161388 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

"Do you have ANY clue what makes an aircraft tic?"

A bomb?

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 01:42 | 3161319 entropy93
entropy93's picture

It wasn't just one battery that failed, now its up to something like three. There is some design flaw or high defect rate. Keep flying and it won't be long until a battery fire brings one down.


Thu, 01/17/2013 - 09:15 | 3161720 Henry Hub
Henry Hub's picture

***they just duct tape the shit out of all the broken parts***

I was in the Air National Guard many years ago. Standing rule was if you worked on an aircraft, you went up for the test flight. Kept everyone focused on what they were doing! I guess things have changed.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 19:58 | 3160307 Dieselclam
Dieselclam's picture

I used to be a quality engineer on this program. I'm not surprised by ANY of this.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 21:47 | 3160695 secret_sam
secret_sam's picture

Lemme weren't a team player in that position, so they had to let you find some new opportunities?

All the QA folks I've ever met have been Linda Greens and Urban Romans....

Thu, 01/17/2013 - 08:54 | 3161683 Dieselclam
Dieselclam's picture ummm...of course they fired me. I was a "threat to the company."

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:03 | 3160328 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

Those fly by wire nightmareliners are a disaster waiting to happen.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:06 | 3160334 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Genetically Modified Organism

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:11 | 3160359 Racer
Racer's picture

Blame it on the Germans for the  Alptraumliner

they took the gold out of the contacts, uh contracts

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:17 | 3160379 pitz
pitz's picture

Didn't Boeing scam the US Government by claiming they couldn't build a B787-derived tanker, instead offering up the obsolete B767 airframe?    Talk about greed and ripping off the taxpayer.  Which seems to be the name of the game. 


Wed, 01/16/2013 - 22:59 | 3160955 Matt
Matt's picture

Q: what's scarier than a Dreamliner on fire?

A: A Dreamliner fuel tanker on fire.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:18 | 3160380 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Government Motor's (GM)  - Cash For Clunkers

Barry's Aircraft (BA) - Cash for  Fire traps.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 20:19 | 3160386 adr
adr's picture

What did they expect from the mind of that sociopath Alan Mulally. His wonderful brainchild and idea of outsourcing to 100 different corporations to produce parts sure made a great plane.

The Dreamliner was nothing but a stock stunt, a very expensive on at that. But it did work and got Mulally a seat at Ford where he ran another stock scam from $1 to $11, making himself quite a bit of money. Oh I forgot he paid himself $1, ahhhh ha hah ha, SURE. If you don't count stock options taxed at 15%.

Made Bill Ford happy though, and Ford didn't take a government bailout, just a couple billion dollars in low interest loans from the treasury. Of course all that money was supposed to be used for building advanced fuel vehicles. We got an electric Focus that we are supposed to believe took more money to develop than the Space Shuttle.

I'm forced to fly at least 10 times a year and I'm scared every time. I've been on a plane that had the windscreen crack, one that lost hydraulics in the tail, one that dropped a couple thousand feet in seconds, and one with stuck landing gear. I'm amazed these things aren't dropping out of the sky daily. Duct Tape can only hold for so long.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 21:49 | 3160700 secret_sam
secret_sam's picture

How can you blame the CEO?  Our aircraft industry is all gummit-sudsibized shit.  I blame Lindsey Graham.

Wed, 01/16/2013 - 22:52 | 3160934 Notarocketscientist
Notarocketscientist's picture

You must be flying shit north american airlines staffed by shit people.


I fly 15-20 times a year and only fly Singapore Air or Cathay Pacific.  Never had a problem


America is failed

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