Meet Mike, The Most Radioactive Fish Ever From Fukushima

Tyler Durden's picture
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/19/2013 13:20 -0400



Almost two years after the awful nuclear disaster occurred, a fish caught near Fukushima on Friday January 18th had a record-breaking level of radioactive contamination over 2500x the legal limit. TEPCO measured 'Mike the Murasoi' at 254,000 becquerels per kilogram (with the limit for edible seafood at 100 becquerels). As Le Monde reports, the previous record (caught on August 21st 2012) was a mere 25,800 becquerels/kg. As further precautions, TEPCO is installing new nets 20km around the Fukushima Daichi site to avoid highly contaminated fish gettig too far and being consumed by other species. While Mike's family are no doubt distraught (at him being caught and being so radioactive), it appears (somewhat disappointingly) that there is no apparent third eye, lazer fins, legs, or other 'expected' 'blinky' malformations.

 

Mike - the slightly crispy looking Marusoi...

 

Doesn't look anything like Blinky...

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Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:22 | 3168928 unwashedmass
unwashedmass's picture

sushi anyone? 

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:26 | 3168933 idea_hamster
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Actually, he was originally a 1" guppy, so his "relatives" are relieved that their gigantified zombie brother is gone....

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:34 | 3168955 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

So, just increase the safety limit for edible seafood.

No problem...

People are going to be used to seeing some pretty big numbers just about everywhere fairly soon anyway...

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:34 | 3168970 BKbroiler
BKbroiler's picture

there's no real problem until they glow in the dark.  

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:35 | 3168976 Harlequin001
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You know you've got a real problem when you look at Blinky and don't see a problem...

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:00 | 3169040 Stackers
Stackers's picture

Godzilla for real will be one broken window Keynesian wet dream

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:51 | 3169164 Fukushima Sam
Fukushima Sam's picture

Eating one pound of this fish is the radiological equivalent of eating over a ton of bananas!

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 15:20 | 3169216 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

Maybe the Germans should check what's makin their catfish grow to 300 lbs.

http://www.spiegel.de/international/germany/rapid-expansion-of-wels-catf...

 

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 15:24 | 3169226 Enslavethechild...
EnslavethechildrenforBen's picture

Feed that fish to the Japanese Bankerticians

Sun, 01/20/2013 - 14:20 | 3170722 espirit
espirit's picture

Thread Hijack.

...and the REAL reason the TSA is removing X-ray machines from airports is that Mike's relatives were last seen entering the country undeclared in the stomachs of Japanese Bankerticians...

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 18:43 | 3169613 magpie
magpie's picture

Really, it's that guy who breeds giant bunnies for North Korea fault

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 21:27 | 3169848 espirit
espirit's picture

Prolly in the tuna and salmon by now.

Yummy.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 21:34 | 3169860 Bicycle Repairman
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Anyone been to the supermarket and noticed the large gap in price between Atlantic cod and "North Pacific cod"?  Apparently some markets still work and contain important price information.

Sun, 01/20/2013 - 13:38 | 3170653 old naughty
old naughty's picture

"Blinky" actually has a hidden twist.

Wikipedia: "The sushi bar that the Simpson family visits is located on a street called Elm Street..."

 

Nightmare !

Sun, 01/20/2013 - 15:11 | 3170883 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Put him in a goldfish bowl and it will look like a freshly poured glass of Pepsi.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 17:04 | 3169439 unrulian
unrulian's picture

i'd peg Godzilla at about +1.3 points GDP 

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:01 | 3169043 secret_sam
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The Chinese would probably love those 3-eyed fish.  Eating the fish eye is good luck.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:37 | 3168981 Troll Magnet
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FUCK YOU BERNANKE!!!

what? wrong thread?
oh.

FUCK YOU BERNANKE!!!

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:18 | 3169087 e_goldstein
e_goldstein's picture

That never gets old.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:21 | 3169095 The Second Rule
The Second Rule's picture

And another thing about the Jews!!!

Sorry...wrong thread again.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 17:21 | 3169474 Likstane
Likstane's picture

JOOBUX!!! JOOBUX !!! JOOBUX!!!

...sorry, wrong guy

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:46 | 3168993 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Serve it to Ann Coulter. She says radiation is good for us.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:32 | 3169122 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

She goes in monthly for her Fuku coolant high colonic.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 15:21 | 3169220 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

I'll give her a high colonic while yelling Fuku

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 15:31 | 3169232 The Second Rule
The Second Rule's picture

Followed by the Fuku equivalent of a Dirty Sanchez. Goddamn reptile with linoleum tits. She probably is Godzilla.

Sun, 01/20/2013 - 22:40 | 3171732 fiddy pence haf...
fiddy pence haff pound's picture

she'll start with the soup

Cream of Sumyounguy

 

 

 

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 16:08 | 3169302 Never One Roach
Never One Roach's picture

Here's a little feller they caught off the coast last week:

 

http://s3.amazonaws.com/creattica/uploaded-images/0001/1805/giant-mutant...

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 16:24 | 3169336 The Heart
The Heart's picture

"People are going to be used to seeing some pretty big numbers just about everywhere fairly soon anyway..."

Would you care to elaborate on that please?

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 17:27 | 3169487 ThatGuyEhler
ThatGuyEhler's picture

Does he really need to? The price of everything is going up constantly, more people being killed in wars overseas, population is growing exponentially... need I go on?

Sun, 01/20/2013 - 05:40 | 3170304 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

I know, this is going to be a horrible thing to much of the biosphere.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 16:42 | 3169391 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Ok, now they have 'killed' Mike, I supect that Mummy will not be pleased at all...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocb7pXndlug

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:24 | 3168934 Xibalba
Xibalba's picture

Fugu, bitchez

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:26 | 3169092 H E D G E H O G
H E D G E H O G's picture

"TEPCO is installing new nets 20km around the Fukushima Daichi site".................Sorta like a Pandoras' Net type thingy, or the Cork outta the Genies Bottle. I heard they've actually wired that MILLION DOLLAR TUNA up and it's helping power Hiroshima now that their half life is fading. Maybe they could like hang these little fuckers up on the street corners for night light? And, I feel safe as hell because I know that our government FDA is doing their job, when they are on it, in inspecting all that imported fish and shrimp coming from Japan in particular, and Asia in general. It used to be that the Blow Fish was the deadliest "edible" delicacy fish, now it's the Glow Fish.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:32 | 3169121 H E D G E H O G
H E D G E H O G's picture

AND........It'll be easier to spot all of those Radioactive saturated Californicators when then finally panic and start fleeing East from all the Fuckashima shit. They'll be glowing in the dark? <humor.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 22:42 | 3169982 mkhs
mkhs's picture

After crossing the pacific, the Fukushima fallout crosses Cali, and then blows on up to Maine.  Still funny being downwind?

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 15:30 | 3169235 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

Re:  government doing their job, I'd say Nuremberg-type trials are in order.  Many people should be convicted for the crimes against humanity now being committed.

 

 

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 15:19 | 3169213 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

Pre-heated, just enough to kill off those pesky parasites that they normally pick up during the course their lives.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 21:47 | 3169879 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Isn't sushi supposed to be raw fish? Mike looks like he's pretty well cooked.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 16:49 | 3169408 RafterManFMJ
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True Facts About the Angler Fish

 

http://www.hungrywalrus.com/2013/01/02/the-angler-fish/

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 17:26 | 3169481 Likstane
Likstane's picture

top 10 of all time!

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 17:26 | 3169485 Joe moneybags
Joe moneybags's picture

You shoulda seen the size of the worm that they used for bait.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 17:55 | 3169534 Fake Jim Quinn
Fake Jim Quinn's picture

Now you know why eating Sushi is a raw deal

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 20:40 | 3169786 Itch
Itch's picture

Sushi is rice. Fish is optional.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:22 | 3168929 Death and Gravity
Death and Gravity's picture

With news stories like this, ZH has really jumped the fish...

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 13:37 | 3168983 Harlequin001
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'... jumped the fish...' - where did that one come from?

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:24 | 3169104 The Second Rule
The Second Rule's picture

It's a ref to 'jumped the shark.'

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 16:15 | 3169316 tenpanhandle
tenpanhandle's picture

Jumped the shark?  Where did that one come from?

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 16:55 | 3169420 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Happy Days for us as you're now jumping the shark.

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 18:04 | 3169547 robertocarlos
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Late in the series of Happy Days the Fonze attempted to jump a pool full of man-eating sharks with his motor-cycle. He failed to land the jump and Kenny died. 'You bastard!"

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 14:03 | 3169048 TIMBEEER
TIMBEEER's picture

Actually, we pay way too little attention to the radiation problem in Japan. It has a huge impact on all of Japan.

Btw, check out the new Toyota Sievert and Honda Curie!

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