Crunching Complex Concepts In The Corner - Caption Contest

Tyler Durden's picture


Is this what tax season prep looks like when you have a Congressionally-imposed ban from using TurboTax? We will let readers decide...


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Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:11 | 3204308 Ivanovich
Ivanovich's picture

Wait...what's this "Healtcare mandate" clause?

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:21 | 3204323 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Germany thinks they'll get it all back in 7 years.  Ha - Corzined 'em.


Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:22 | 3204340 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

Ah, it feels good to have such a long silver boner coming out of my ass.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:29 | 3204362 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Thought bubble:

“ If those GOP bastards will just let up a bit,  maybe I can get my desk back from pawn.”

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:37 | 3204386 Slewburger
Slewburger's picture

"I yelled at Ben to print, and he told me the inflation numbers didn't correlate to GDP growth, it was at that point I realized he was using TurboTax. I swear my prinout is here somewhere."

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:44 | 3204405 Nihilarian
Nihilarian's picture

Memorizing lines for the sequel, The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:45 | 3204410 ZippyBananaPants
ZippyBananaPants's picture

It's hard to fart sitting like this

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:45 | 3204415 fuu
fuu's picture

Hank only needed 3 pages.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 20:02 | 3204465 fourchan
fourchan's picture

this is goldman, the mission if you choose to accept it is to head up our world

branch the imf. good work fucking america for us and good luck at the imf tim.

this chair will self destruct in 54321...poof

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 20:27 | 3204533 Sophist Economicus
Sophist Economicus's picture

"Didn't I fill out all these forms a few years ago?"

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:38 | 3204738 Stackers
Stackers's picture

When no chairs are left at the kids table.....

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:46 | 3204757 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Schedule C.... Schedule C...... where the hell is that Schedule C?

Ah, fuck it, I'll just fill in what I want and blame it on Turbo Tax.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 22:07 | 3204816 SafelyGraze
Fri, 02/01/2013 - 00:36 | 3205173 All Risk No Reward
All Risk No Reward's picture

"If the Fed/Mega Bank Duopoly lends America $20 FRNs @ 5%, America will owe $21 in a year, yet they only have $20...  so they can't pay and my bosses OWN their *sses.

The American Republic couldn't be slayed by the world's largest military of its day, which was unbeaten up to that point, but is slayed with 5th grade math.

I can't believe these f*ers got away with it!

5th grade math...  Darwin must've been right.  These people are really dumb.

Debt Money Tyranny - identify the real criminals and pay it forward:

They hate you, people - and middle management and engineering types, you need to wake up before they bust you, too.  They want to bust us all - and when they do, there ain't no going back.

Fri, 02/01/2013 - 04:42 | 3205428 zhandax
zhandax's picture

"WTF is with this application?! Goldman already has a DNA sample and knows I like it on my knees"

Fri, 02/01/2013 - 08:45 | 3205651 kralizec
kralizec's picture

"Hmm...nothing in here about me and those two gay rodeo clowns...I'm good!"

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:43 | 3204748 Shell Game
Shell Game's picture

'Dammit, Simon Black said this expatriation paperwork was easy!'

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 20:29 | 3204543 Wakanda
Wakanda's picture

or "LOTR IV:  The Scouring of the Shire"

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:35 | 3204391 bdc63
bdc63's picture

We'll, at least they didn't make me wear the 'dunce' cap this time ...

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 20:17 | 3204510 jekyll island
jekyll island's picture

Nobody puts baby in the corner

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 22:11 | 3204832 akak
akak's picture

What does it mean, "color inside the lines"?

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 23:19 | 3204997 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

LOL              hujel

Fri, 02/01/2013 - 03:54 | 3205397 AgShaman
AgShaman's picture

"I only wear this cheap suit cuz' they said I couldn't be in my pajamas"

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:22 | 3204345 I am more equal...
I am more equal than others's picture

Behind the curtain is the great and powerful

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:25 | 3204357 I am more equal...
I am more equal than others's picture

Or a tribute to Monty Hall...


And behind Curtain number two is a pile of number two....

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:50 | 3204769 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Ben told me there would be naked girls coming down this pole but all I find is this pile of forms with a note from Lloyd saying "Sorry for the deception, Tim, but I'm gonna need you to finish my taxes now."

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 20:41 | 3204371 sunaJ
sunaJ's picture

[Agent TK421 reads to itself in Thermian...]




To:      Agent TK421 [a.k.a.: Geithner]

From:  Central Command


Psy Op mission complete.  Human social chaos is assured.  Please find enclosed your evac kit:


Three (3) vials of soylent green for emergency nourishment;

One (1) "How to Act Human and Pretend to Have Empathy: A field guide for Thermian agents";

One (1) letter of indemnification from the U.S. Justice Department.


You and other agents of your op will rendezvous at 21-Alpha with Thermian battle cruiser: My Precious for immediate dust-off and shuttle to mother ship.  Report to Lieutenant Svytnilqipoy for your instructions regarding imminent ground invasion of Earth.


General Bjorkyl out.



********This message will self-destruct*******

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:34 | 3204723 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

" Hey look, the old TARP request "  Hmmm.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:33 | 3204378 LongSoupLine
LongSoupLine's picture

"Why the fuck did LongSoupLine tell me to meet him in this funeral home, and why do these papers say, "put head between legs asshole."?"

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:52 | 3204433 edb5s
edb5s's picture

"I really thought Davos would be nicer than this...wait a minute, this isn't Davos! Mapquest is more abstruse even than Turbotax!"

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 20:04 | 3204473 bobthehorse
bobthehorse's picture

I called my poor old mother.

I asked if there was any hope.

She told me I was adopted and not to call her again.

I'm crestfallen.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:44 | 3204756 harlanaladd
harlanaladd's picture

"Dear Mr. Geithner:

We regret to inform you that we currently have no employment openings that are a good match for someone with your skills and experience. We will keep your resume on file for a year, and will be happy to inform you should a suitable opening appear.


Thu, 01/31/2013 - 23:25 | 3205012 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture


Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:13 | 3204312 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

Damn Goldman Sachs employment contract. Why do they have to be so wordy!

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:15 | 3204321 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

Where the fuck is the salary and bonus part?

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:22 | 3204339 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Does selling my soul count as a depreciation of assets or capital gains?

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:25 | 3204356 OutLookingIn
OutLookingIn's picture


Lets see if they have this correct.

If Jane has 12 apples and she gives seven to Larry...

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:42 | 3204751 Vandemar
Vandemar's picture

Jane prints 12 more apples.  A monetary base of 12 apples discourages trade and is not enough for a healthy economy!

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 20:26 | 3204530 Wakanda
Wakanda's picture

Sorry, that's been gone for decades.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 22:43 | 3204898 are we there yet
are we there yet's picture

It depends if it is sequestered.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 23:30 | 3205021 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Trick question.  When you're soulless it's just another fiat ponzi...but on the plus side, he never felt a thing.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:52 | 3204430 Nihilarian
Nihilarian's picture

His stress test results came back positive.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:13 | 3204313 localsavage
localsavage's picture

How the fuck is anyone supposed to understand which health care plan to go with?

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:29 | 3204704 DosZap
DosZap's picture

How the fuck is anyone supposed to understand which health care plan to go with?


Easy, the only one you can afford.

Most employers of size, will dump their plans.When that happens I see more fines for NO coverage than new mandated policies.

A LOT of states are not, and will not set up the Gov't Mandated Plans.

So who ya gonna call?.

IF your fortunate enough to be able to self insure, it will be on a Catostrophic,uber high deductible plan, or you will not have ANY.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:15 | 3204314 Muppet Pimp
Muppet Pimp's picture

They never let me sit at the big kids table

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:16 | 3204318 Lost Wages
Lost Wages's picture

"Looking at my contract I just realized I don't get any severance pay."

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 21:27 | 3204699 tenpanhandle
tenpanhandle's picture

Tiny (IQ) Tim finally reads the small print in his contract's severence clause - "off with his head"

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:17 | 3204322 BTFDemocracy
BTFDemocracy's picture

Looking for traces of Germany's 300 tonnes.

Thu, 01/31/2013 - 19:17 | 3204324 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

Crouching Liar

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