23% Of America Is Illiterate

Tyler Durden's picture

Following on the heels of the dumbing down of the State of the Union speech we noted yesterday, we thought a simple visualization of just how stunningly poor our nation's reading skills really are would be useful. One in five Americans lacks the basic reading skills beyond a 4th grade level - are you one of them?



Source: http://www.onlinecollegecourses.com

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Supernova Born's picture

Illiterate masses fuel .gov power like no other group.

Say What Again's picture

I know how to write good.

I can read anything as long as there are no more than 140 characters.

Stackers's picture

What does illiterate mean ?

Say What Again's picture

It means they are ill -AND- terate (I suggest you google terate on your own)

economics9698's picture

Go to any pre-algebra class, 25% will not have a clue.

Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Or how to calculate a percentage.


TheFourthStooge-ing's picture


Que? No hablas Ingles!

Dang, looks like ain't nobody never learned you no good english.

erg's picture

That's unpossible. America is perfectly cromulent.

mick68's picture

23% of America is illiterate.


Edit 93% of America is illiterate. *Fixed*


90% of Americans don't know the difference between there, their, and they're. Grade 3 english.

erg's picture

The collective doltishness of the flock has transposed the meaning of lose and loose.

It is mostly wrong for so long as to become endemic. The new normal.

Entropy reigns supreme.

Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boris is not understand what your talking about! Their are too many English words for sound same. Its too hard!


(See what Boris do!? Is make self-deprecating statement of ironic humor!)

TruthInSunshine's picture

In other news, 23% of government employees are literate.

Grow that government larger, ObaMao! Yes you can! You're going to bring about a "smarter, more efficient government" just as you will surely bring 1 million electric vehicles to America's roads by 2015 (as promised in your 2009 SOTU, but...hmmmm...not mentioned last night).

Associated Press Photo of President's convoy driving to the Capitol Hill Building for last night's State of The Union Address

In other news, it's nice to see the dot.com 2.0 bubble back and bigger than ever, as television ads for every future failure of a company from Seamless.com to musicMagpie, and every asinine company in between, are back on the air.

But, I'm probably wrong, as "most of these Winners of the New World 2.0 companies don't even have earnings per share," and the Muppets will all grow increasingly wealthy on a permanently rising slope!

I do hope that the Bernank can maintain his "virtuous circle jerk" at least until he's no longer the Fed Head, for the sake of his illustrious legacy.

nofluer's picture

If you loose an arrow and don't watch it, you could lose it.

MachoMan's picture

I have no doubt that 23% of america is illiterate...  the problem is that this is an irrelevant statistic when 85% of americans are fucking retarded (and I'm being generous).

Supernova Born's picture

I really think the illiterate need to chime in here.

Talk about a one-sided discussion!

DriveByLurker's picture

They'll post rebutals on YouTube, the soapbox for the illiterate.

Sean7k's picture

If they are going to point out the best and worst towns, don't you think they could place them on a map correctly? Should we add geography too?

SafelyGraze's picture

"23% Of America Is Illiterate"

.. and the other 84% can't do math so good

rfaze's picture

If 2/3 dropped out of high school that means 1/3 have high school degrees and cann't read. 

I wonder how many have college degrees? ( In economics) 

Matt's picture

No Child Left Behind! Whether they can read or not!

new game's picture

90 percent of them have a smart phone-any corelation?

mess nonster's picture

qjbevf;o' boi;jrv;jjrbv':K;kk2k4ejbnvq3tr;b'

nofluer's picture

The funding for the proposed "Chime Provision for the Poor and Illiterate" bill was blocked in committe.

Water Is Wet's picture

Humans aren't smart individually, not even you.  Man's body of work is brilliant (look at anything on wikipedia), but get anyone outside their comfort zone and they are "fucking retarded."  So congratulations on observing the obvious.

Water Is Wet's picture

You're right.  In all the words in that post, I didn't use the word "that."  Congratulations to you, too, for observing the obvious.

You didn't say shitmuffin.

THX 1178's picture

I believe the correct phrase is, "You aint sed that."

Matt's picture

I think you have this bass akwards. Large groups of people are only as smart as the least of them. In a riot, both the rioters and the riot police demonstrate the mentality of the least of them. Only individuals can show intelligence. Humanity as a whole seems no better, and in some ways worse, than yeast.

Water Is Wet's picture

Rioting is an extreme condition, and I don't think your conjecture that all exhibit the quality of the least is valid.  Yeast has not invented technology and dominated the planet the way man has.  Every "intelligent"/"smart" person made some incremental steps past the multitude of all knowledge recorded through history up to that point.  I really don't think anyone is remarkably "intelligent."  Idiot savants have their unique facets, but I don't consider them smart necessarily, either.

Swarmee's picture

I dunno, it seems to me yeast have trained us humans quite well in perpetuating their kind. It turns out certain wines get specific flavor characteristics from the yeast strains which live in wasp stomachs and are transferred to the grapes when wasps eat them. So vintners tolerate the wasps to preserve their wine flavor and the wasp-yeast benefits.

Matt's picture

Name one technology that was co-created by a committee of 1 Billion people and I will concede your point.

1 person can be a genius.

Think of deciding which restaurant to eat at with 6 other people.

Now think of any meeting you sat in with 20+ people.

Sure, everything is based on what came before, but each invention is the work of one or a small number of people thinking at once, not the work of a committee of people sitting around looking for a 50%+1 vote.

Individuals can choose whether to have children, how many to have, etc. Humanity as a whole multiplies to the maximum amount of food and resources available.

The larger a group of people, the more irrational, emotional, ideaological, and rigid the group is. Not with one view, but with their sub-groups.

Forget about Genius. I bet that if you took a group of 1000 random people and put them together in a group, they would collectively have a sub-100 IQ, or substandard on any test of cognitive ability, provided you allowed everyone to speak. As soon as one person said something, like "anyone who says the answer is B is an idiot", even if B is correct, at least 60% of the people will not answer B because they do not want to feel like an idiot.

Actually, we know this to be true:



new game's picture

solution-moar smart phones, free anyway to get them in the hands of poverty strichen dumb fucks.

sales flattening-obvious correlation to the problem...

where is my smart phone? ap for being smart?

dis dat da

spankfish's picture

Ahhhh... yeast infections, or is it beer?

nofluer's picture

The yeasty smelling mob rose to the occasion.

Ness.'s picture

Chicago has a literary rate of 63 percent. This means that 37 percent of the population are not literate or cannot read/write.

Arne 'Duncan' Donuts, former CEO of the Chicago  Public School system, is the President's choice as US Sect. of Education.

Blankenstein's picture

Well, in his defense, if this sloven mess doesn't like him, then he must be better than CPS and their moronic union.  But that doesn't say a hell of a lot.



nofluer's picture

Obama only appointed him because he thinks he can get free doughnuts for life...

Ms. Erable's picture

And if you believe that, I have two bridges in Brooklyn to sell to you, too.

Daily Bail's picture

I see your illiteracy and raise you some Santa Cruz.

This shit is f*cking hilarious.

Meet Chairman Bernanke's Replacement - Happy Hour In Santa Cruz

Dr. Sandi's picture


90% of Americans don't know the difference between there, their, and they're. Grade 3 english.

They're all over there with their friends.

So their!

TheFourthStooge-ing's picture


They're all over there with their friends.

So their!

Dr. Sandi has gone rouge.

nofluer's picture

Uh huh! Just as I suspected! This board is populated by YANKEES!!! ANY intelligent person knows it's spelled "THAR" in ALL cases and uses!!!

mkkby's picture

They don't even consider science literacy.  95% at level 1.

Dugald's picture

"90% of Americans don't know the difference between there, their, and they're. Grade 3 english"

Hole in one!!!

mckee's picture

Like I said, there all idiots!

akarc's picture

there, they're, their now, don't be so quick to judge

eatthebanksters's picture

Das rite!  Muhfuggas don' need a spell...we got Obama phones and welfare and food stamps and shit...

booboo's picture

remarkulas stats, if'n we could pay the teachers moar we kuld have fantabulous chilenz.