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Interns At These Companies Are Getting Paid More Than You

Tyler Durden's picture


And by "you", we mean of course the average American worker, who according to the Census Bureau averaged a full-time income of $4,400 per month, and whose plight has been documented extensively as making less and less on an inflation-adjusted basis every year, having an ever older average age, putting off retirement indefinitely, and whose lifestyle continues to deteriorate in line with the progressive elimination of the US middle class. But for every million or so disenfranchised workers, there are a few hundred lucky ones, in this particular case interns who work at companies that pay better than the average American worker. So if you are tired of making next to minimum wage, here is your chance to start afresh as an intern with zero experience at one of these 25 companies, while probably making more than the current jobs pays.

From Bloomberg:

Interns at the 25 best-paying companies earn an average monthly wage of between $4,604 and $6,704, according to a list provided by jobs site For context, the average U.S. household pulls in about $4,400 monthly, based on U.S. Census Bureau data.

Who’s paying up? “In tech and finance, the war for talent continues to be fierce, and it’s not so surprising that the war for talent is fierce at the intern level,” says Dobroski. “Why not tap the best young minds right out of the gate?”

Here’s the list, lowest to highest:

25. Qualcomm: $4,604
24. Bank of America: $4,605
23. SAP: $4,615
22. BP: $4,631
21. BlackRock: $4,698
20. Intel: $4,836
19. Tagged: $4,909
18. Capital One: $4,930
17. Deutsche Bank: $4,943
16. Shell Oil US: $4,975
15. Chevron: $4,999
14. PayPal: $5,060
13. Yahoo: $5,063
12. Apple: $5,277
11. Nvidia: $5,286
10. Amazon: $5,436
9. ConocoPhillips: $5,607
8. Microsoft: $5,847
7. Adobe: $5,861
6. LinkedIn: $5,866
5. Google: $5,891
4. Facebook: $6,084
3. ExxonMobil: $6,268
2. EBay: $6,500
1. VMware: $6,704


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Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:05 | 3253503's picture

at first I felt good about myself because I thought the amounts were on a yearly basis but.....ffffuuuuucccckkkkk thats a load for an intern.  I guess it pays to be a intern or "community organizer"

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:10 | 3253514 BaBaBouy
BaBaBouy's picture

Geee Let Me Take  Whild Guess ... Sack Man GOLD ???


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:45 | 3253665 quintago
quintago's picture

Combine this with 3.5% interest rates and now you know why the Silicon Valley housing market is effin ridiculous. 20-30 offers on homes which just 18 months ago would sit on the market for months. Back in 2000 (last tech bubble) I was an intern at a semiconductor company and they were paying me $4500 a month. I was an undergrad.

Shortly thereafter, it died. Some of the same stories -- crazy intern pay, out of control office rents, out of control housing activity. It's Silicon Valley - it comes and goes. The only problem is that we're at 3.5% rates. Not much fat left on them bones if things go sideways again....

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:11 | 3253743 Nussi34
Nussi34's picture

The EU bureaucrats are missing on the list. Most likely they are off the charts!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:20 | 3253933 SeattleBruce
SeattleBruce's picture

Wait a second - do they make you work?  I think I'd still prefer all the free stuff Obamao is giving me, and I get to play vids in Mom's basement (with chip breaks).../sarcy role play

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:34 | 3253968 jballz
jballz's picture

If you people spent as much time working as you did whining about the government, you would earn enough to get me a raise on my food stamp allowance.

Get busy, bitchez.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 22:30 | 3254706 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Q: How many is take Food Stamp recipient for screw incandescent bulb?

A: 47 Million, but all is sit around and wait for someone else to do job.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 04:05 | 3254714 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Q: How many is fat cat banker for screw incandescent bulb?

A: Check posterior, banker too busy screw you to screw bulb, so answer is none.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:45 | 3253836 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Interns would need real skills to work at (for example) ExxonMobil or Intel.  Not an engineer (or similarly well-skilled)?  Back to the grindstone then, bitchez!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:21 | 3254083 IEVI
IEVI's picture

Intel pays more than that for skilled interns...more like $7000/mo 

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:40 | 3254279 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

big tits helps

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:50 | 3254307 ceedub
ceedub's picture

You don't need real skills.  All you need is a good GPA and an engineering degree.  Once at co-op at Exxon they aren't really tasked with much from what all of my friends who worked there said.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 22:54 | 3254772 Big Corked Boots
Big Corked Boots's picture

Well, it only costs $5.00 to get it out of the ground.

(or was that something else...?)

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:58 | 3253699 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boris is remember intern for munitions factory. Intern is have important job handling explosive and combustible materials. Low pay but is great honor. Boris is still have 9 finger so is not to complain.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:09 | 3253735 Ivanovich
Ivanovich's picture

Da, tovarisch.  I think I remember a cartoon like that where Bugs Bunny hits a bomb on the head with a hammer, and then writes "DUD" and moves to the next one.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 20:10 | 3254478 redpill
redpill's picture

We should do that to Congress.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 20:57 | 3254544 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

If you do a good enough job with the hammer, no need for the rest.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 22:26 | 3254696 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Remind Boris of Bernanke joke. When all is got nails, everything is looking like hammer.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 22:28 | 3254702 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Sorry, Boris is screw for joke and ruin plot line. Should write, "When everything is look like hammer, all Bernanke need is nail."

Or something...

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 17:28 | 3257467 AGuy
AGuy's picture

In America Bernanke Prints Dollars into Toilet Paper. In Former Soviet Russia, They exchange America Dollar Toilet Paper for Gold Bullion.


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:58 | 3253701 Double.Eagle.Gold
Double.Eagle.Gold's picture

Intern pay is unusally high because it's become part &  parsel of recruiting talent. About 80-90% of the interns get offers. The point is, the Company get's to really see what the candidate's potential is. It's worth paying for that. 

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:28 | 3254605 Spigot
Spigot's picture

Internships usually are given to the daughters of the firms' management. The 10% know how to feather their own nests.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:08 | 3253515 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



But it's a very inexpensive alternative to bringing on full-time entry-level or experienced hires.  And with the number of unemployed, reasonably qualified people out there, the companies probably get a pretty good return.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:27 | 3253594 Ignatius
Ignatius's picture

I suspect a 'tax angle' here without, incidentally, any direct evidence whatsoever.

My cynicism showing through, I know....

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:43 | 3253661 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

probably not, unless the interns are former felons or meet some other subsidized class...

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:10 | 3253738 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

Lesbian African American disabled mideget  limbo dancers ?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:46 | 3253837 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Wow. I like the way your mind works. Care to intern at the SEC?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:17 | 3254219 ATM
ATM's picture

That would be Human Resources - down the hall to the left.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 20:10 | 3254481 redpill
redpill's picture

Limbo?  How about pole?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:21 | 3253777 Mrmojorisin515
Mrmojorisin515's picture

like veterans?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:28 | 3253595 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

"ffffuuuuucccckkkkk thats a load for an intern."  I bet they're also getting laid more.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:35 | 3253622 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

I suspect that these are the figures for only those interns who CAN get a job.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:42 | 3253657 Harbanger
Harbanger's picture

With those Govt funded high wages not everyone who applies gets hired.  There' stiff competition to only hire the interns who CAN get the job done.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:59 | 3253703 foodstampbarry
foodstampbarry's picture

There' stiff competition to only hire the interns who CAN get the 'blow' job done.


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:27 | 3253951 Jugdish
Jugdish's picture

How about a sexually deviant dyke with a bull cut that just despises everyone and life itself? You can find many of them in lower level gov't positions and as head of homeland security.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:31 | 3253608 SmittyinLA
SmittyinLA's picture

Al Gore's pet green energy company "Bloom Energy Corp" of Sunnyvale CA paid its Mexican "interns" $2.66 an hour, but they have strong wage pricing power in CA, the whole state is a F'kin whorehouse run by brain dead hippies on the take.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 23:24 | 3254862 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

Is that you Smitty, Guardsmark Smitty from AZ?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:26 | 3253789 midtowng
midtowng's picture

A lot of these are for companies in the SF Bay Area.

  Makes one wonder what the economy there is like.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:17 | 3253929 stacking12321
stacking12321's picture

it's not bad here surprisingly, but it's been better

unemployment is (relatively) low, building vacancies are low.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:11 | 3254051 Boondocker
Boondocker's picture

its good, relatively speaking, in the silicon valley.....elaewhere it is a service economy.  

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:06 | 3253506 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Back in the 90s interns at the White House were paid 'loads'...

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:09 | 3253519 zuuma
zuuma's picture



Well played.



Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:34 | 3253599 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

For those of you who enjoy watered down beer...


- I did not have sexual relations with that woman = 'it's clownbux, bennybux, green & white paper fiats'

- I did not stick a cigar in her pussy & come on her face in a chair behind the RESOLUTE DESK = 'after all the calliope music, in the end ~ they're joobux'


Happy 'PRESIDENT'S DAY' celebrations to you all!




Now ~ I think I'll casually meander on over to that WHY PEOPLE DON'T SEE thread to check out all the insightful commentary...


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:35 | 3253625 walküre
walküre's picture

Francis, can you find peace in this?

What if money were no object?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:39 | 3253641 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Money is no object for me... Can you make that statement for the .01% that try & put a jackboot on the rest of the 99.9%?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:56 | 3253687 walküre
walküre's picture

That's not the point. There have been and always will be .01% putting the jackboot to the rest of us.

Can we ignore the jackboot? Can we ignore their alleged powers and controls over us if we simply disengage and disobey?

What are they really worth if the 99.9% refuse to pay them any attention?

Life is short. Our life is all we've got. They try and steal away our time by way of putting the spotlight and the attention on them. I refuse.

Stop consuming their pride and feeding their egos. They will die and become dust just like the rest. What will it have mattered to them personally how rich and powerful they were the minute they're dead and they will inevitably die. Their memories die along with them.

Money cannot be the purpose of our existence. But if we elevate the status of the moneychangers by living only for their benefit, then we cannot enjoy our life as miserable as it may be.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:02 | 3253712 RichardP
RichardP's picture

They will die and become dust just like the rest. What will it have mattered to them personally how rich and powerful they were the minute they're dead...

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:20 | 3254040 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Oh that's real sound advice walkure...


Ignore them... Be silent... keep chopping straw in the mud to make Pharaoh's bricks & pretend you don't care...

Sincerely Yours,

Ramuses II ~ [so let it be written... so let it be done]

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:52 | 3253849 Whiteshadowmovement
Whiteshadowmovement's picture

Alan Watts was a genius and brilliant philosopher:

“Through our eyes, the universe is perceiving itself. Through our ears, the universe is listening to its harmonies. We are the witnesses through which the universe becomes conscious of its glory, of its magnificence.”

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:59 | 3253870 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

Alan Watts may indeed be a genius; but the Universe is not interested in our desire to experience it. If you see something, say something..... to yourself and write it down. No matter what you know, without regular practice it is a dead end on your shoulders.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:58 | 3253700 11b40
11b40's picture

Don't forget to celbrate this:

Weapons of Mass Destruction

Mission Accomplished

You are doing a heckofa job, Brownie.

...could go on, but why bother.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:07 | 3253508 zuuma
zuuma's picture

What will my "wymens studies" degree fetch??


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:13 | 3253527 W74
W74's picture

It'll fetch you single-motherhood and an automatic welfare check + CS payments + Alimony if you unfortunately had marriage forced upon you by the patriarchy.  A womens "studies" or AA "studies" can be pretty lucrative if you have a strong desire to work the Professional Victim career field.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:38 | 3253637 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

According to calculations that victimhood welfare queen income is equivalent to $69,000 a year.  Thats nearly $6000 a month.  That's about what Qualcomm interns are earning.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:20 | 3254228 ATM
ATM's picture

And there you have it!

Add in a little black market income and suddenly all these poverty stricken muthafuckers is rich, bitchz!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:09 | 3254357 847328_3527
847328_3527's picture

Nothing like watching a Newbie signing the dotted line for a $780,000 condo mortgage on a first-time $60k salary.


It's almost painful.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:35 | 3254411 Crisismode
Crisismode's picture

It's not painful . . . .




It's delicious.

Thinking about what they will be facing when all this shit goes south in a few years.

And their privileged Ivy Leage $300K education goes swirling down the toilet.

I feel their pain.


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:42 | 3253656 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

See quite a bit of that around here...  One necessary aspect of big alimony payments is being a hopeless dependent...  in other words, it means never gaining the capacity to earn a living for yourself.  If this is the "empowerment" that womenz studies teaches, then awesome...  rhymes with keynesian economics methinks.

When the ladies at the bar ask you for your last 3 years tax returns before they'll drop their trousers, run the other way.

What gets me about the local country club wives is that not only do they not have to get an actual job, but they get nannies and housekeepers to boot...  if you're not going to raise the kids, then what the fuck do you do all day????  A little tennis...  some margaritas...  some pills...  the poolboy...  hit the gym in the most revealing clothing possible while doing as little actual workout as possible...  and have some botox for supper...

Good work if you can get it I guess.  But for the men, your life is over with a large divorce obligation...  child support and spousal support on top of a large debt load is curtains for any fun you had in your life.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:34 | 3253807 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture


if you're not going to raise the kids, then what the fuck do you do all day????

The ones I know pop anti-depressants like crazy.  They're all fucked up, because the husband uses them for sex and arm candy only.  If they get a look from another guy, they know if they reciprocate they're out the door.  My wife has a friend who is one and always phones crying how unfulfilled her life is being a glamor queen.

Believe me, those "Real Housewives of....." women are empty.


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:37 | 3254122 Big Corked Boots
Big Corked Boots's picture


Celibacy is charachter building.

As for me, I've been married to Rosie Palmieri for the last 30 years. It's not a very fulfilling marriage but she's quiet and I get to keep my own paycheck.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:06 | 3254041 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

that's why they'll go after guns but never ban internet porn

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:24 | 3254091 hardcleareye
hardcleareye's picture


Sorry but I stopped reading at "When the ladies at the bar ask you...."

If you think that a "decent woman" is going to be trolling for a "guy" in a bar or a country club, I seriously question your judgement.....

Old expression, "You lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas....."

And I didn't give you the minus......

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:30 | 3254249 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

No disagreement from me...

It's a commonly held belief among non-yokels when they come here that the local women require a "w2" before they'll give you their number...  I think this has to do with the podunk towns they're from and their own feelings of inadequacy, but that's another story... Although there is some truth to it.

At any rate, no...  if you want to find a wifey, then don't go to the bar...  didn't meet mine there and I don't know of anyone else who is still married that did either.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:13 | 3254572 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

I met my wife at an after-church function.


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:52 | 3254445 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

It will teach you to "fetch" your own fucking beer from the neighbors fridge since the wyman you married is now having group sex with with the entire CSP agency and has taken all your appliances.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:07 | 3253509 q99x2
q99x2's picture

I'll take VMware please.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:08 | 3253511 kliguy38
kliguy38's picture

Don't interrupt me.......I'm listening to the Deification of Jerry Buss on CNNBS.....watta complete joke...........fochin basketball ......we're lost

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:11 | 3253532 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

I was once enamered by what was trending on Yahoo, because it was amazing what housewives and unemployed teenagers were reading.  But now  llok at what is trending on CNN.  Why?  Because what trends on CNN is the same thing that trends on Yahoo, but the readership is more edumacated.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:08 | 3253513 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

And half of those interns have boob jobs.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:35 | 3253626 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Quite the quandary...  you need a boob job to get a boob job...

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:42 | 3253828 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Turning them Bs to Cs to Ds!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:08 | 3253905 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

Not so fast. You need to be a real boob to get a boob job. Better to buy the pole factory and rent it out to strangers with seductive lighting like a carousel for dikkhedds while you play grab the brass chechbook.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:37 | 3253630 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

Yep, looks like Silicon Valley is still holding up.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:14 | 3254573 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Is that pronounced "Silly Cones?"

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:09 | 3253517 Bam_Man
Bam_Man's picture

These "interns" are usually the offspring of the well-connected 0.1% deemed too dim-witted and/or lazy to participate in the family business (racket).

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:22 | 3253569 gbresnahan
gbresnahan's picture

After reading your post I now know the definition of "talent"

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:10 | 3253523 spinone
spinone's picture

Thats because interns, or kids, have fresh skills that experienced workers dont

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:10 | 3253524 Bam_Man
Bam_Man's picture

"I'll take ebay for $6.500 Alex"

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:38 | 3253636 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

Sorry, but you have been outbid !!!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:10 | 3253525 Bobportlandor
Bobportlandor's picture

Not one of these in an day to day or survival situation is useful to anyone.

except maybe Oil. But even that is questionable

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:11 | 3253914 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

Yow! It must be tough inn that cave. Did you try aging Roquefort? I hear there's maybe a pear in your future.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:12 | 3253530 ghengis86
ghengis86's picture

But it's a University degree? Says so right before Phoenix. WTF?

Can I defer my loans for a few more decades?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:11 | 3253531 Shell Game
Shell Game's picture

It's okay in Bizzaro World!  Where, "the single mom is better off earnings gross income of $29,000 with $57,327 in net income & benefits than to earn gross income of $69,000 with net income and benefits of $57,045."  

When work is punished, Bitchezz...  (


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:11 | 3253533 Perpetual Burn
Perpetual Burn's picture

My border patrol friends make Over $10,000 a month with no college degree. Good old government. 

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:13 | 3253540 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

Practically speaking, that pay is probably appropriate. Unless the CBP guys are comfortable middle/upper middle class, bribery is going to be a HUGE problem.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 20:37 | 3254518 Perpetual Burn
Perpetual Burn's picture

It's still is a problem. People get busted for working for the cartels more than you think.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:14 | 3253545 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



...obviously none of that is "performance-based" pay.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:12 | 3253538 edifice
edifice's picture

Well, considering many of these firms are located on the East Coat, or in San Jose, CA, $6,700 isn't that large of a wage. It might get you a shoebox apartment and a diet of ramen; you might be able to splurge on mac&cheese, once in a while.

But, for an intern, that is a large wage...

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:14 | 3253544 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

Idiot companies...they'd probably be able to have people lined up and willing to do one year FREE internships. 

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:15 | 3253546 dlc
dlc's picture

Not IBM?  Do these numbers include benefits?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:17 | 3253548 Acet
Acet's picture

Frankly any company out there which doesn't benefit directly or indirectly from tapayers' money can pay their interns whatever they want. If they want to pay them in blowjobs from $1000/hour escorts, go right ahead.

However any company whose profits or simply whose survival comes from the State or Central Bank intervention, that's a whole different ballgame: if society has to support you, you have to support society back.


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:29 | 3253597 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Why would you draw the line at "direct" dependency on government largesse?  It seems incredibly obvious at this point that virtually every business is dependent upon our money spigot, given every asset class is artificially inflated.  So is the guy that mows the doctor's yard any less dependent on the government than the doctor?  We're hopelessly entangled in moral hazard at this point...  It literally permeates ever aspect of our economy.  In short, you're making a distinction without a difference.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:36 | 3254269 edb5s
edb5s's picture

Gold, bitchez!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:31 | 3254397 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

More to the point,how much is left of an economy thats productive and  not on Govt.

life support in one form or another?

10%or 15% maybe.

Dead man walking.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 00:48 | 3255141 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

That's my guess...  I think more sadly than that...  how much of the economy wants to roll up its sleeves and rebuild?  Where is the will to succeed?  I bet it's even a smaller percentage than that...  All we know at present is how to down free lunches like there's no tomorrow...

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:17 | 3253551 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

i would never pay that mush for BJ's

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:18 | 3253554 Sweet Pea
Sweet Pea's picture

But the company gets to keep all your brilliant ideas!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:16 | 3253925 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

Debt slaves willingly give up their IP to get into the master's house, and learn the difference keeping the plantation in high cotton.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:18 | 3253555 Diesel Seven
Diesel Seven's picture

I can see the tech firms wanting to latch onto code-writing studs (and studettes), but c'mon, BAC on the list!!! Guess that's the best way for a banking executive to hook-up with the hottie co-eds.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:19 | 3253560 babylon15
babylon15's picture

Zero pharmeceutical companies, zero engineering companies.  Hope you didn't get a STEM degree.  If you did a Comp Sci degree you might be okay.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:01 | 3254324 fnordfnordfnord
fnordfnordfnord's picture

STEM techer here, babylon is right. Engineers are the fry cooks of industry.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:33 | 3254406 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

As it ever was.

All the work,and very little of the money.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 03:48 | 3255414 mkhs
mkhs's picture

Engineers are the prostitutes of science.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:21 | 3253567 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

Totally sustainable.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:23 | 3253572 SmittyinLA
SmittyinLA's picture

most US college graduates wouldn't qualify for 95% of those "intern" jobs which require skills that 95% of most college graduates can't meet. 


Not a big demand for "psychology" on that list.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:25 | 3253581 Smegley Wanxalot
Smegley Wanxalot's picture

These interns are fools.  My friend's mom makes $79 an hour at her PC selling something that you need to go to a strange, virus infested website to learn about.

That, plus the Honorable Prince Kawa Bunga III of the Nigerian Oil Mining Corsortium has a deal for you!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:40 | 3254623 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

+1 for the post -- User name, priceless.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:27 | 3253586 walküre
Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:27 | 3253589 optimator
optimator's picture

If I had to do it all over again, I'd quit high school at 16, move to NYC and get a job as a janitor at Goldman Sachs.  I'd be the wealthiest retired janitor the world has ever seen. 

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:33 | 3253617 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Close.  For anyone with any semblance of intelligence, getting a GED and getting the fuck out of high school early is the best route...  if you want to go to college, then make a sufficient score on their entrance exams and rock and roll...  otherwise, get to trade school immediately and start making money...  by the time the other idiots graduate high school and then dick around college for 5 years, you'll have a solid 6-7 years experience on them in a practical area of the economy.

While you'll probably miss out on the social education, you'll at least have the possibility of enjoying adulthood with this route...  after all, you can play beer pong on the weekends or at night after your trade job.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:22 | 3254384 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

MachoMan: Absolutely right! Back in the dinosaur age when I was in (get)high school, had I known I could do a 4-5 year program in 6 months I would have freaked out on my parents for letting me waste YEARS of my time. But I doubt they realized it either.

I think grade school / high school are nothing more than glorified babysitting institutions. I only started learning and becoming self-taught AFTER getting out of school.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 20:20 | 3257873 Sokhmate
Sokhmate's picture

are nothing more than glorified babysitting institutions.


They're also vagina fests

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:33 | 3253619 Motorhead
Motorhead's picture

Yeah, just think how many "shitty deals" you'd be cleaning up.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:32 | 3253616 Haus-Targaryen
Haus-Targaryen's picture

Um, interns at the Big 250 law firms are pulling down $13k a month.


Source: First hand knowledge.  Google "Cravath Scale" if you don't believe me. 


This list is a joke, and these companies should not be anywhere on the top anything for interns getting paid.  Start looking up the big law firms on Sachs 5th and your eyes will pop.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:37 | 3253631 SolidSnake961
SolidSnake961's picture

those law interns are much older so yea it would be higher for them, these interns on this list are the average juniors in college aged 20-21

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:36 | 3253628 smartstrike
smartstrike's picture

VMware is laying off 900 employees, they're #1. Ebay is #2.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:42 | 3253654 Lord Of Finance
Lord Of Finance's picture

"Wealthiest Janitor"


It actually would be practicing what they preach, if these wealthy socialist, quasi-marxist libs did pay more money for their own help. But they do not.


I remember when socialist candidate Walter Mondale, when he was running for Senate after Wellstones death, made his whole campaign about economic justice. He repeatadly stated, 'We have to take care of the people who sweep the floors.'

    He was then asked how much he and his wife pay their house floor sweepers per hour, and he declined to comment.

    An article in a minnasota paper also claimed that Mondale was the owner of several downtown properties that had hired janitors. They were making an average pay of $10 per hour. 

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 19:38 | 3254419 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

I'm  sure he meant by insider trading on info gleaned as a janitor.

Whats sauce for the squid is sauce for the janitor.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 15:15 | 3255413 Lord Of Finance
Lord Of Finance's picture

Oh. Now I get it. Very good wit. Even though I missed that point, at least there is a point to what I wrote. Just disregard the part where I thought that 'optimator' wanted to be a Goldman Sachs janitor!






 I am unable to edit/erase the posting:)

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:50 | 3253666 Lord Of Finance
Lord Of Finance's picture

These assholes are hypocrits. That is the great misunderstanding that people have with socialists and marxists. They never practice what they preach, but implement their fallacious policies on the people. They themselves are not true believers, so that goldman janitor position might get you one dollar more per hour to start. Plus it is the city, so you will have to join the SEIU, and pay union dues that will be funneled right back to the politicians/people who claim to care about you.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 23:44 | 3254925 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

These assholes are hypocrites. That is the great misunderstanding that people have with capitalists and fascists. They never practice what they preach, but implement their fallacious policies by, for, and on other people. They themselves are not true believers, so that stuff about meritocracy and competitition should be taken with a grain of salt. Plus it is the city, so you will have to join the country club, and pay bridge and tunnel tolls, that will be funneled right back to the politicians/people who claim not to be influenced by you.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 02:15 | 3255296 Lord Of Finance
Lord Of Finance's picture

To GMad:


  The great misfortune with capitalism is that we have assholes who lack a conscience and create moral hazard. The free market system is dysfunctional because of moral hazard created by the corrupt policy makers. capitalism itself is not corrupt. My virtual mentor, Jim Rodgers made a simple analogy:


                                    'Capitalism is like a ferrari. It is a wonderful, beautiful machine. The problem is not with the car,

                                     the problem is the driver(s).'


   We need to be conscious capitalists who hold esteem for higher virtues. We don't have enough of it. Don't blame the gun. Blame the one who pulls the trigger.



On comparing paying highway tax and joining a union. Invalid analogy.

We ALL pay highway taxes. We have no choice. Joining a union where dues are a requirement is a choice made freely by the individual.

Now of course you would say that driving is a choice, and it is. But public transportation is not free. Part of those transit fairs cover the cost of road repairs. Of course you would respond that we could choose to walk or ride a bike, and to that I'd respond, "give me a break, and take a hike!"









Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:51 | 3253684 JamesBond
JamesBond's picture

average U.S. household....

how many income earners does that average?   



Mon, 02/18/2013 - 14:56 | 3253696 spekulatn
spekulatn's picture

19. Tagged: $4,909


I'm guessing this should read Target.


Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:11 | 3253742 world_debt_slave
world_debt_slave's picture

I'd rather keep my <$900 a month job than work for a corporation.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:33 | 3253804 Catullus
Catullus's picture

Frumpy, over 27 year old women with no MBA need not apply.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:41 | 3253826 mind_imminst
mind_imminst's picture

Who is making $4,400 a month? None of my close family or aqaintences. I must be at the poverty level or something.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 23:39 | 3254903 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Noone...that's just the average of Lloyd's $12M and 120M wage workers.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:48 | 3253839 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

children and relatives of congressmen and senators mostly

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:48 | 3253840 NoWayJose
NoWayJose's picture

Notice that except for oil companies, NONE of the other companies actually 'makes' anything. In fact, several don't even 'make' a profit.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:47 | 3254300 fnordfnordfnord
fnordfnordfnord's picture

Qualcomm and Nvidia make stuff and Amazon sells stuff.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:51 | 3253848 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

Interns are simply making an equity bet on the value of proximity to higher-value occupations rather than a cashing more PV as a debt coupon from existing and dated streams of current income. Evolution is like the math you will never see solved in equations on chalk boards.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 15:59 | 3253876 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 Long, Vaginas~  The last bastian of retail theft!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:22 | 3253936 Intoxicologist
Intoxicologist's picture

I'll stick with Adult Daycare W/Alcohol, thank you very much.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:25 | 3254094 Super Broccoli
Super Broccoli's picture

come on those interns probably hold 3 PHDs, 5 masters, speak chinese and russian fluently, have big boobs and short skirts ... they're worth the paycheck !

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:55 | 3254166 847328_3527
847328_3527's picture

I guess I'm out of the Loop. Our bossman pays a bonus of 2 McDs Big Macs per employee (and that's on Christmas!!).   Houses in my area falling in prices like lead weights. Lots of unmowed lawns, broken fences, rentals all over....


I guess the NAR is right, "All real estate is local."

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 08:37 | 3254182 Umh
Umh's picture

It's like the rich guy I know who thinks everything is okay because some kid is getting $15/hr to hold a sign next to the highway. It didn't occur to him that the kid was probably connected  somehow and he should perhaps check out all the $7.xx/hr store clerks.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:10 | 3254200 Umh
Umh's picture

I'm lost. What is Tagged?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 18:54 | 3254313 three chord sloth
three chord sloth's picture

Why are you comparing intern pay (i.e. one person) to that $4400 per month household income (i.e. often more than one income)? The correct comparison would be intern salary to median salary... which is about $3250 per month.

The government began throwing around this household income crap a few decades ago. Before that, it was always average salary or median salary. I suspect they use the household figure as a purposeful deception to hide the private sector wage stagnation.

Don't go along with the lie. Don't compare intern salaries or teacher salaries or cop salaries to household income... it's apples and oranges.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 03:22 | 3255392 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

And when Q12013 rolls around and the next phase of "pump eps for insiders" occurs using share buybacks and "pump earnings" by firing as many as possible, then, can I return to my warehouse job?

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 07:07 | 3255543 lemarche
lemarche's picture


Tue, 02/19/2013 - 12:57 | 3256465 roadhazard
roadhazard's picture

"$ 4,400.00 a month" = LOL, that's like saying inflation is 2%. I have to wear hip waders when looking at any number with a $ or %. Everything is bullshit.

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