Goldman 'Explains' The 'Market': "Best Not To Look A Gift-Horse In The Mouth"

Tyler Durden's picture

Good news, bad news, no news, dips, no dips, who cares. As Goldman sales/trading desk says, never look a gift-Bernanke in the mouth (especially if he ends up in a frozen lasagna at a store near you).

From GS:

A solid rally today and new cycle highs for US equities – but that’s where the story stops. No obvious catalyst. No bullish data. European stocks traded well, with most people pointing to a better German ZEW print, but it’s not clear why that would translate into such a strong US trading session. Maybe it’s best though not to look a gift-horse in the mouth.

One can't help but laugh at this "market."

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SHEEPFUKKER's picture

Don't put gifted horse meat in your mouth. 

FL_Conservative's picture

Is there a "market" out there?

Richard III's picture

A gift-horse, a gift-horse ! My kingdom for a gift-horse !

nmewn's picture

All that paper's getting a little hot to hold...who will buy my paper? ;-)

redpill's picture

I rushed into this thread dearly hoping it was heavily laden with horsemeat jokes and I didn't have to go farther than the first comment.  I love ZH.

 

Jay Gould Esq.'s picture

What do I fear ? Myself ? There’s none else by.
Lloyd loves Lloyd; that is, I and I.

yogibear's picture

It doesn't matter, Bernanke and the Fed will make a market with their infinite fiat.

Cult_of_Reason's picture

"Has the Federal Reserve Ever Tried to Manipulate the Stock Market?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXmNpdYpfnk

 

Groundhog Day's picture

i don't want to cry so i laugh at my put positions

lineskis's picture

Tyler, is it possible that the "great rotation" out of bonds and into stocks is taking place in an unexpected form, namely out of JGBs and into US stock market?

Martin Armstrong's take is that with the fall of Europe and Japan, the USA are currently the only game in town which might explain why we could see new highs in US equities.

http://armstrongeconomics.com/2013/02/07/japan-russia-dow-dollar-bears/

What do you think?

Careless Whisper's picture

Interesting. Thanks for the link.

dark pools of soros's picture

If we're going to crash hard into a full on depression expect a hell of a wild bender ride first

H E D G E H O G's picture

okay, ONE MORE FUCKING TIME, TAXPAYER/INVISIBLE FIAT DIGITS ARE GIVEN TO SLIME BALL BANKERS, SAID BANKERS DON'T LOAN THIS FREE FUCKING "MONEY" OUT, THEY DUMP IT INTO THE MARKET WHERE THEY CAN GO UP, OR DOWN IN A NANO SECOND AND FUCK EVERYBODY ELSE THATS IN THE WAY. THEY CAN'T LOSE WHEN PLAYING WITH THE HOUSES MONEY! IT'S CALLED THE WEALTH EFFECT, CONJURED UP BY NONE OTHER THAN WALL STREET BOUGHT AND PAID FOR GOVERNMENT OFICIALS. NO VOLUME, NO PROBLEM, WHO CARES.

Hulk's picture

Damn man, you are going to run zerohedge out of black ink...

sgorem's picture

don't worry about the INK, READ THE MESSAGE.......................................

LongBalls's picture

REFUSE to PLAY. Pull your damn cash. Damn people. It's simple. The house is stacked against you. Pay off your debt if you have any and sit back, enjoy the show, and sleep soundly knowing they have nothing of yours to steal. The MARKETS ARE DEAD. YOU ARE OUT GUNNED, OUT MANNED, OUT HFT'ed, SIMPLY PUT, YOU ARE BEING OUT MANIPULATED. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. SCREW EM'!

Gold and Silver are being crushed by paper games. When they push it low enough and you are afraid of inflation then go buy some. Other than that stop whining. It will never cease untill we pull our willingness to play the fucking dream (nightmare) with placed bets they can steal.

EXIT THIS ABORTION UNTILL THESE ASSHOLES GET THE MESSAGE. Stop fucking around and correct this bull shit mess once and for all. Untill then fuck em'. ABORT! 

Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Sounds like a passive aggressive dig at Moe and the SEC. Fuck with us we wipe out everyone's savings in a rigged stock market crash. I say bring it mother fuckers and so we can hang your asses on it.

NotApplicable's picture

Like the owners of the SEC have any need to scare the hired help!

You need to stop following the script (especially the scene where you get even with them after the crash).

I see this as nothing more than GS having to say something, yet having absolutley nothing to say that wouldn't be incriminating.

The idea that GS has an adversarial position with the SEC is juvenile. They own it, and they've always owned it.

Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

I tend to believe that also but I'm willing to give Moe at least one shot to prove she isn't more of the same. I still say the statement is a passive aggressive pot shot reminding everyone who calls the shots with this market.

NotApplicable's picture

There is absolutely no way on Earth that she'd ever gotten the job if that were the case.

Remember, ALL of these people, including O'bummer, are thoroughly vetted (read: black-mailed) to ensure loyalty.

If anything, the pot shot you see is merely manufactured to give you another glimmer of hope.

Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Even if Moe is on the payroll, the fact they even feel the need to put up a fake good cop in the name of appearances is telling that they are concerned about the negative sentiment being voiced in comments in places like here and individual blogs. The open information revolution is rattling them....

Okay explain to me how it is a glimmer of hope? Serious question not being sarcastic.

dark pools of soros's picture

Have you worked in the corporate world and swam a bit with the sharks? Even in those swarmy pools, they only promote their own... So in those deep waters there is no chance anyone doesn't play along for fear of being drowned instantly

When they retire and write a book they can be honest about things from 30 years ago

Tic tock's picture

Though what are the chances ther's going to be a global economy - methinks GS, for all it's balls, might've hitched to the wrong wagon

ekm's picture

As I've been saying over and over and over and over.

This casino can only and only and only go higher. It has been like that since Dow at 10k.

No news needed, no events required.

 

A 1987 repeat is at hand, very soon. A collapse with no news, no events.

A collapse out of silence, as soon as Obama gives the HALTING order to Benny B.

FL_Conservative's picture

People (lots of them, including all the so-called "experts", like Bernanke) said the same thing about the real estate market.  It can ONLY go higher.   That worked out well for a lot of people, now didn't it?

Rainman's picture

Our favorite casino managers got big raises today...Moynihan grabs a 71% raise for selling assets and firing people.

 

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2013-02-19/bofa-grants-chief-moynihan-11-million-in-stock-bonus-for-2012.html

 

AllWorkedUp's picture

Obummer will never give Benny the halting order - Obummer works for the banksters not the other way around. This market will keep going higher until there are sufficient sheep funds to be stolen. That may take awhile.

mantrid's picture

buy the pink-slime dip!

 

http://www.newyorkfed.org/markets/tot_operation_schedule.html

 

February 19, 2013 February 20, 2013 Outright Treasury Coupon Purchases 02/15/2036 – 02/15/2043 $1.25 - $1.75 billion

February 20, 2013 February 21, 2013 Outright Treasury Coupon Purchases 05/15/2020 – 02/15/2023 $2.75 - $3.50 billion

NotApplicable's picture

Meanwhile, with only $3B, FDR bought ALL of the damn local political machines, nationwide.

Interpolating from this, I can only assume that war is but weeks away.

Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

That gifthorse meat is just being used to bail out the ECB banking system anyways...

FL_Conservative's picture

It's a freaking European delicacy.

buzzsaw99's picture

it's just the same 500 shares trading back and forth all day long

astoriajoe's picture

Its not a gift horse if it can be taken back from you.

Best sell it and realize the gift for what it is I suspect.

Bobbyrib's picture

You also have to take the "Goldman loves to fuck its client over" factor into effect. There is no telling what Goldman is doing investment wise..

Everybodys All American's picture

Bernake is a horses ass and this is criminal fraud rather than a market.

fuu's picture

"Maybe it’s best though not to look a gift-horse in the mouth."

Close your eyes and keep breathing, it will all be over soon.

Oldballplayer's picture

That's what I say to my wife. Well, not the whole sentence. Ok, one time. One time I got to say the whole sentence. What a night that was.

A Lunatic's picture

There must be two Goldman Sachs? A good one that gives good investment advice, and a bad one that fucks people over every chance they get............. No??

Racer's picture

There is a ..... good..... GS?

sorry I think you have overdosed on something that has severely affected your mind

NotApplicable's picture

Well, he is A Lunatic, after all.

toys for tits's picture

 

 

That was Not Applicable.

Rainman's picture

Bernank's $ 85B/mo payoff key must have been fat fingered today. That's a lot of fiat moving things. The squid already knows this.

ABG LINE's picture

Straight from the horse's mouth.

SilverMaples's picture

GS, the first one to sell whenever they find a scapegoat event good enough ...

Phoenix_Rising's picture

It's a laugh riot for sure

Even funnier is the people that say.."look at the stock market, everything's fine"

Blind in one eye, can't see out of the other

ebworthen's picture

Is this the same gift horse the Europeans have been eating?

JenkinsLane's picture

"This is not the beef you're looking for..."

 

ZeroAvatar's picture

No, their's is of the 'Trojan' variety.