Zimbabwe's Mugabe Proclaims Himself Africa's Goldman Sachs

Tyler Durden's picture


Since we first started discussing the new frontier of investment (or economic hitmen), Africa has been appearing more and more in the headlines - from labor conditions in the South to military action in the North. Natural resources and leverageable assets remain key as the infamous Zimbabwean 'dictator' Robert Mugabe, fighting for re-election at the age of 89, maintains that Zimbabwe's difficulties stem from a Western plot to re-colonize it. With more than 80% of the country unemployed but rampant inflation somewhat calmed, Reuters notes that Mugabe believes "It's God's choice" that he is running in this close election. Just like Goldman Sachs "doing God's work", Mugabe believes "this is a task the Lord might have wanted me to fulfill among my people...," regarding the liberation struggle for black economic empowerment. More than 4,000 out of an original 4,500 white-owned farms have been seized since 2000 under a program he says is aimed at correcting land ownership imbalances created by colonialism. The consensus is that a free and fair election will create a true democratic outcome, but as one local noted "with his record I just don't see how Mugabe can win a free and fair election." Indeed, though the jackals remain.

How the Economic Hitmen work...an oldie but a goodie...


Via Reuters,

Robert Mugabe said he had a "divine task" to lead Zimbabwe, shrugging off concerns about his health and fitness for office as he prepares for what could be one the closest election battles since he came to power in 1980.

Few Zimbabweans are ruling out victory for the 89-year-old Mugabe even though his country, once an African success story, is in a decade-long economic slump worsened by Western sanctions and more than four fifths of the population is unemployed.



Rampant inflation has calmed, the mining sector is buoyant and agriculture is picking up after turmoil caused by the seizure of farms from their white owners under Mugabe's policy of black empowerment.


Mugabe, Africa's oldest president, maintains that Zimbabwe's difficulties stem from a Western plot to re-colonize it, a view that strikes a chord with his supporters, who see the sanctions as punishment for a justified campaign to wrest their country's wealth from the hands of foreign corporations and the white minority.




"Why is it that all my friends are gone and my relatives are gone and I continue to linger on? Then I say to myself, well, it's not my choice, it's God's choice," Mugabe said at the party late on Wednesday, which was attended by state media.


"This is a task the Lord might have wanted me to fulfill among my people...," he said. "I read it as a bidding of God... The bidding says you move forward ever."




Mugabe says he wants to continue the liberation struggle and consolidate black economic empowerment.


More than 4,000 out of an original 4,500 white-owned farms have been seized since 2000 under a program he says is aimed at correcting land ownership imbalances created by colonialism.




"I hear a lot of people talking about a tight race, but with his record I just don't see how Mugabe can win a free and fair election," said 28-year-old Charles Simukai, who was selling fruit on the streets of the capital Harare.




"The general consensus is that you need a free and fair election for a real democratic outcome ... but there is no consensus that Zimbabwe will get that," said Eldred Masunungure, a political science professor at the University of Zimbabwe.




But ZANU-PF appears to have accepted that Mugabe has maneuvered himself into a position where he ends up president for life, a position that opponents say he wants as security against possible prosecution for rights abuses.


"What we have ... is a president celebrating his 89th birthday while planning on how he can continue in power after so many years in office. That is not normal," said professor Masunungure.

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Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:04 | 3265323 SHEEPFUKKER

Or African Pope.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:09 | 3265333 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Pope gave up the Papacy for Lent.  This guy gives up nothing.  Always interesting to hear how these leaders of the impoverished, while living in oppulence, were appointed by "the Lord".  A little bit blasphemous?


Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:20 | 3265365 knukles
knukles's picture

Dontcha just love it?
The white Rhodesian farmers (by and large, fact) who had fed much of the African continent were expropriate out of their lands (or many just plain murdered) which were then turned over to and managed by the good indigenous folk, turning such into a starving, lawless, rabble of misery.
An entire culture up for the Darwin award?

the Rhodesian Army used to have some bad ass camo...

But I digress...

A "Little" blasphemous?

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:22 | 3265372 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

Meet Muammar al-Gaddafi 2.0

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:24 | 3265379 knukles
knukles's picture

A true real time example of the tyranny of evil men perverting the good found deeply within religious principles in the name of the inequities of the selfish.

True Hell deserved for that man.
And I do mean the fire and brimstone kind.
Evil, pure evil.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:48 | 3265570 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

I can never read your little words there knuks.  You must have a 36" monitor and have the zoom on 200% or something.  lol.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:26 | 3265384 knukles
knukles's picture

I saw that :)

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:58 | 3265457 bank guy in Brussels
bank guy in Brussels's picture

The Mugabe - Qaddafi comparison is quite apt

For all their failings, they have been two African leaders refusing to get on board the Nato programme with the West

Especially memorable is Mugabe's speech in Rome in October 2005, where he compared Bush and Blair to Hitler and Mussolini, for their collusion in starting the Iraq war which killed over a million people:

« President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe has denounced US President George Bush and British Prime Minister Tony Blair as "the two unholy men of our millennium" in a speech to the UN food agency in Rome.

Making a rare appearance on the international stage because of EU travel sanctions imposed for alleged vote-rigging, Mugabe slated the two leaders as "international terrorists" for launching a war in Iraq and for meddling in the domestic affairs of small countries like his own.

"The US and Britain have taken it upon themselves to decide for us in the developing world. Even to interfere in our domestic affairs, and want to bring about what they call regime change.

"Where are their democratic tenets? Where is their morality? Where is their compliance with the salient principles of good governance?" asked Mugabe, under fire from both the US and Britain for persistent human rights abuses. »


« Must we allow these men, the two unholy men of our millennium, who in the same way as Hitler and Mussolini formed [an] unholy alliance ... »

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:15 | 3265490 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

One hopes that Belgium as well will soon experience the joys of Congoid rule. 

Fri, 02/22/2013 - 01:31 | 3266144 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

Umph. Well aside from their shopping sprees in Hong Kong while "his people" were dying from hyper inflation, he got some things right.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:25 | 3265380 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Loved your immigration video, knuks.  Thought we could all use a chuckle.  Have you see this on golf?



Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:34 | 3265405 knukles
knukles's picture

Kaiser, that's precious.
The best line is the reference to Tiger... "the son of an American Black and a Thai woman, a combination that not even a German geneticist would have figured..." what with all the eugenics popping up these days.
Many thanks.


Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:40 | 3265417 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

I sent the vid of the Dude in his leather jacket to my daughters, so they can torture all their Eastern libtard friends with it.

If you hear Halloween type groaning from a distance, it may be having some effect;)

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:44 | 3265428 ersatzteil
ersatzteil's picture

Rhodesian vets showed us that you can eat rotten meat immediately after boiling it, since they couldn't risk shooting live game as it would give away their position.

Cream of the evolutionary crop.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:14 | 3265487 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

FN FAL-now that's a fucking battle rifle

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:29 | 3265524 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Thanks for the tip.  Some of us are.., ahem, collectors.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:46 | 3265564 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

good field rifle-not so good in urban areas because of size but it can punch through walls with .308 round

Fri, 02/22/2013 - 03:26 | 3266266 Ar-Pharazôn
Ar-Pharazôn's picture

honestly no. this is one of the worst rifles ever did

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:51 | 3265448 Uber Vandal
Uber Vandal's picture

Dead Kennedys: Back in Rhodesia


The more I listen to these 30 year old records, the more it is obvious that Abso-****ing-lutley nothing has changed.

Esp. when you listen to what Jello had to say in the clip below.....


Fri, 02/22/2013 - 03:45 | 3266277 Missiondweller
Missiondweller's picture

Wow. Can you imagine a Democrat being accused of being an ultra conservative now? Things sure have changed in 20 years.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:42 | 3265553 Go Tribe
Go Tribe's picture

Drone you, Mugabe.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 22:09 | 3265623 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

Mugabe needs to go along with his cronies.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:06 | 3265332 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

After they Corzine all the money 80% unemployment is the Squid's dream for the USA also.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:07 | 3265334 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Will these old cretins just die off already. Why is it that the most corrupt MFrs in the world live forever?

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:19 | 3265369 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

The Devil takes care of his own.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 23:13 | 3265800 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Replaced by whom, exactly?  Just..... stay away from the place.  Let him have his little shit-hole and delude himself believing he's anointed by God.

Fri, 02/22/2013 - 01:01 | 3266095 prains
prains's picture

Why NoDebt?

because the people he terrorizes don't look like you????

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:07 | 3265337 cherry picker
cherry picker's picture

He kind of reminds me of someone else.  I wonder if he uses a teleprompter?

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:08 | 3265338 MoneyThangs
MoneyThangs's picture

Mugabe and Obama seem to share a kindred spirit. At the rate of brainwashing Americans are enduring we might well see Blankfein and Dimon become the future POTUS and Obama as CEO of Goldman Sachs in the not too distant future.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:15 | 3265354 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

No Obummer will be living in opulence while they fund his lifestyle. The rest of the country will continue its decline to 80% unemployment while Blankfein and Dimon continue their behind the scenes raping of the world.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:40 | 3265420 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture


Fri, 02/22/2013 - 01:04 | 3266101 prains
prains's picture

Guys Guys Guys and Girls

cast your gaze further Obanana is a paid stooge for your oligarchs quit bemoaning the Obamatron he's bought and paid for instead look for the signature on his check and you find the source of your problems




Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:09 | 3265339 nmewn
nmewn's picture

80% unemployment...whats not to love about this guy?

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:11 | 3265340 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

I wonder what "resource" these economic hitman coveted in America.  Hmmm... 

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:14 | 3265352 The Third Man
The Third Man's picture

A certifiable monkey...

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:16 | 3265356 loveyajimbo
loveyajimbo's picture

Strange that the two twin gorillas magoo-mbe and lloyd the Roid are still walking around unperforated...

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:17 | 3265358 q99x2
q99x2's picture

I vote for Mugabe but suggest he modify his political message to include public hangings of banksters and a national bitcoin monetary system. Most political wannabees around the world would be elected on that platform.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:36 | 3265406 Sizzurp
Sizzurp's picture

Mugabe, like all the other Marxist losers, are great at taking a prosperous country and turning it into ruin.  They capitalize on human weaknesses, like greed and envy, to stoke the masses into a frenzy of looting and stealing.  If somebody has something of value and you want it...just take it.  It's the undoing of civilization, and it's coming soon to your' neighborhood thanks to our own Mugabe of America.  I think I hear a flash mob in the distance.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:15 | 3265492 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

kind of like S Africa was fucked up after land redistibution to the natives

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:25 | 3265513 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

Stop whining. Get gun. Shoot them. 

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:40 | 3265421 Kalevi
Kalevi's picture

Seems to me that this honourable gentleman is a bit ahead of the curve,

Gods work a la squid and democracy a la Van Rumpy...

Watch and learn.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:41 | 3265423 Stuffs And Stuff
Stuffs And Stuff's picture

Apparently God's work has been outsourced like everything else.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 20:57 | 3265454 FubarNation
FubarNation's picture

Remember Rhodesia!

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:10 | 3265476 Sizzurp
Sizzurp's picture

I went to school with some of the Rhodesian refugees, and I remember the stories they told of what it was like to be attacked in your home by mobs of armed thieves in the dead of night.  They told me they were never without a firearm.  Eventually, anyone with any sense just got the hell out of there with whatever wealth they could smuggle out in diamonds.  It was a tragic tale of SHTF.  

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:45 | 3265563 FubarNation
FubarNation's picture

'Mugabe and the White African' is a movie everyone should watch.  It illustrates so well how fucked up Rhodesia has become since the blacks have taken over. 


My new favorite reading is now about the RLI, SAS, and the RAR.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:15 | 3265491 tony bonn
tony bonn's picture

mugabe is a pompous arrogant jackal....is gideon gono running as vice satan of zimbabwe?

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:16 | 3265493 Hedgetard55
Hedgetard55's picture

Fucking moolies, man.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:17 | 3265496 ShrNfr
ShrNfr's picture

A hell of  a note that Ian Smith was completely correct.

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 21:32 | 3265531 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

Rhodesia sold out by the Brits...at behest of Jew-banksters. Same with White S. Africa. Same with White Australia. Same with White America. See a genocidal pattern here?

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 22:43 | 3265723 W74
W74's picture

What's funny is that Rhodesia's farms alone fed half the continent.  Now that they're all subsistence operations then can barely feed the peasants who're fortunate enough to live on the land and work a portion of it.  The rest are starving, malnutritioned, and dying of diseases which they believe can be cured by raping babies.

But I don't disagree, the changeover was forced by the planet's most genocide-minded group.  Whether the plans were formulated in Tel Aviv, Washington or New York is irrelevant, the fact that they exist is proof enough.  Spread the word, all too few have woken up to the madness.

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