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Cramer Does It Again

Tyler Durden's picture




 

From the "Bear Stearns is fine" man himself, circa 7 hours ago: "It is a monster move. A lot of people being left behind. A lot of shorts. This thing won't die. There is a show, again, very good ratings, The walking dead. You know, you can't shoot this thing. Shoot it in the head and nobody's been able to do it. This thing has legs.... Can't talk enough about it"

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Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:43 | 3275267 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

DOW 2600, yes we can!

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:44 | 3275273 ZippyBananaPants
ZippyBananaPants's picture

Cramer can lick my salty nut sac!

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:46 | 3275286 blu
blu's picture

If someone told him it would improve ratings, he would do it on-air.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:52 | 3275318 DJ Happy Ending
DJ Happy Ending's picture

I have often wondered how many times he hosted Mad Money hopped up on coke.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:57 | 3275359 Fredo Corleone
Fredo Corleone's picture

"No! No! No! Bear Stearns is not in trouble. If anything, they're more likely to be taken over. Don't move your money from Bear."

-- James Cramer. March 11, 2008.

...March 14, 2008:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2008/mar/14/creditcrunch.useconomy

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:58 | 3275367 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Had Money with Jim Kramer on CNBS!

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:05 | 3275403 I am more equal...
I am more equal than others's picture

 

 

 

Mad Money went to ...

Fad Money which led to...

Had Money resulting in ...

Sad Money

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:12 | 3275428 mr. mirbach
mr. mirbach's picture

The trick to making a small fortune in today's market is to start with a LARGE fortune.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:14 | 3275433 James_Cole
James_Cole's picture

Jim Cramer is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:23 | 3275470 I think I need ...
I think I need to buy a gun's picture

cramer is a psychopath, with attention always needed, he should have been on an island 10 years ago

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:59 | 3275575 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture
Jim Cramer VS. Leonard the Wonder Monkey

 

Jim Cramer is right 49.27% of the time.
Jim Cramer's picks average a 0.15% ROI after 30 days.

 

Leonard The Wonder Monkey is right 49.55% of the time.
Leonard's picks average a 0.30% ROI after 30 days.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:11 | 3275626 a growing concern
a growing concern's picture

So, roughly the same as flipping a shiny new ASE?

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:41 | 3275749 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

Looks like they pulled  the plug on the video..., or something.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:59 | 3275800 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

 

You know, you can't shoot this thing.

 

Need to take the safety off first.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 20:28 | 3275745 I am more equal...
I am more equal than others's picture

Kicked Cramer in his little monkey dick

You sucked the little monkey's dick.  Umm good, to the last drop.

 

So, what you are saying is Cramer is a monkey's offspring. Ummmmm.....  OK, I can see it.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:25 | 3275688 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Alcatraz comes to mind, immediately.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 21:09 | 3276030 tallen
tallen's picture

There's a reason why they call his show MAD money. You'd have to be insane to listen to his investment advice.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:16 | 3275640 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Cramer and douche bag Krugman need to be "Mussolinied."

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:25 | 3275689 Tijuana Donkey Show
Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

Cage fight to the death! Freddie, you'll love it, since Mel Gibson is a huge anti-semite too!

http://i276.photobucket.com/albums/kk37/Bogman_photo/Sci-Fi%20Film%20Sti...

Tue, 02/26/2013 - 00:23 | 3276588 EscapingProgress
EscapingProgress's picture

I want to poop directly onto Cramer's bald head and rub it in.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:27 | 3275697 caimen garou
caimen garou's picture

J.C. is nothing more than a dingle berry hanging from the ass of wanna be dr. P.K.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:58 | 3275796 James_Cole
James_Cole's picture

Not a fan of the manchurian candidate I take it..

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 20:47 | 3275970 Desert Rat
Desert Rat's picture

ru suggesting JC is a brainwashed pawn? hmmm... way to think outside the box...

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:58 | 3275793 Crassus
Crassus's picture

@ James Cole. I was one of the original Chinese workmen who laid the track on this stretch.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 22:14 | 3276232 mama said
mama said's picture

wow - your life must suck...

Tue, 02/26/2013 - 00:28 | 3276603 ImReady
ImReady's picture

He gave you coke, didn't he? 

 

Tue, 02/26/2013 - 01:07 | 3276663 James_Cole
James_Cole's picture

C'mon has no one here seen / read MC? 

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 22:09 | 3276214 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

He Bad Money.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:02 | 3275377 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

If anybody needs to be shot in the head, it's Cramer.

Oh, wait,... that's his least vulnerable spot...

 

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 21:42 | 3276124 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

One would need to be a very precise shot to hit anything vital

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:01 | 3275383 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

honest question....whom do you think writes his scripts.....legit answers ....there is a pool of people to think of ....rev. al haha but who fuckin knows..what white house figure is pulling these strings...

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:20 | 3275654 Race Car Driver
Race Car Driver's picture

Ken Lay.

 

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:14 | 3275434 Uber Vandal
Uber Vandal's picture

I loved how he perfectly spun that to mean don't move your deposits from Bear.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qa50zFAdpto

Start at 0:22

 

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:43 | 3275537 thismarketisrigged
thismarketisrigged's picture

@fred corleone, the best part about that entire cramer bear stearns thing was his excuse.

 

after he started getting blasted for that advice, he came up with an excuse that he was not talking about the stock bear stearns if it was safe or not to keep your money in it, but he claimed he was talking about his actual bank account.

 

now i have watched that show a decent amount of times for laughs, the only reason people call up is for stocks, not for there personal bank account information.

Tue, 02/26/2013 - 02:57 | 3276763 All Risk No Reward
All Risk No Reward's picture

Just doing "God of this world" work by separating the chaff from their debt money cash - but not the debt.

Got two faced money?  I thought so... [note - PDF format, but pretty good content]

http://www.thetwofacesofmoney.com/files/money.pdf

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:57 | 3275360 redpill
redpill's picture

Easier to ask how many times he's hosted it when he's not.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:58 | 3275364 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:21 | 3275458 Larry Dallas
Larry Dallas's picture

I'm still absolutely dumbfounded that he's not been taken out yet on a hit.

 

 

Tue, 02/26/2013 - 02:59 | 3276764 All Risk No Reward
All Risk No Reward's picture

Don't be - Cramer works for the people who control the hit men...  and spy on everyone's communication.

If anyone takes him down, it will be his handlers hwen it is time to go Night of Long Knives on these Vichy collaborating punks.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:36 | 3275515 Karl von Bahnhof
Karl von Bahnhof's picture

Very many.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:52 | 3275570 Papasmurf
Tue, 02/26/2013 - 00:53 | 3276646 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture

Jeeesssshhhh, that one never gets old...I mean EPIC meltdown...haaahahhhaaaahahaa

Tue, 02/26/2013 - 00:05 | 3276545 dogbreath
dogbreath's picture

I'd like to have the  income of his coke dealer

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:47 | 3275292 Spider
Spider's picture

Come on now, everyone knows that Cramer statements have a shelf life of 6 hours or so - its probably in the CNBC legalese.

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:12 | 3275427 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

The shelf life of other things, say with 1950s technology, might be a little longer...  Stuff from that era is often EMP-proof as well!  This article is devoted to the young people here, just so you know what was accomplished "back in the old days"...

 

"Mid-Twentieth Century Technology"

http://tinyurl.com/abj7ddz

 

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 19:27 | 3275701 Tijuana Donkey Show
Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

You better hurry up and go boating...

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:47 | 3275294 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture

Cramer is the perfect sheeple's analyst!

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 17:59 | 3275349 Pegasus Muse
Pegasus Muse's picture

Cramer:  "Booyah, baby!  This market just won't die.  Got legs, I tell ya!"

Cramericans:  "We're gonna plaster your ugly mug on the Wall of Shame."

Mon, 02/25/2013 - 18:12 | 3275397 Paper CRUSHer
Paper CRUSHer's picture

*The embodiment of pure bullshit.

*The truest/purest form of a 'pull out your intestines and squeeze tha shit outta dem' salesman.

Only one answer folks please.Choose wisely.

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