Janet Napolitano Dazed And Confused About What Sequester Really Means

Tyler Durden's picture

In the face of Janet Napolitano's terrifying claims that major airports were already seeing lines "150 to 200 percent as long as we would normally expect" as a result of the budget-crushing sequestration cuts that went into force on Friday, The Telegraph reports that, in fact, LAX "haven't had any slowdowns." But how can that be? The government said it would all be horrible - and to think of the children... it appears Ms. Napolitano was speaking that dialect of English we call 'politician' as airports have 'received no reports of unusual security delays.' Unpossible. The DHS would not return calls questioning her exclamations that she "did not mean to scare, just inform," about LAX, O'Hare, and Atlanta's Hartfield-Jackson. This scare-mongery follows Maxine Waters' 170 million unemployed claim and Arne Duncan's teachers already being laid off claims. Trust, indeed.


Via The Telegraph,

Ms Napolitano said today that major airports were seeing lines "150 to 200 per cent as long as we would normally expect" as result of the federal spending cuts that went into force on Friday.


"We're already seeing the effects at some of the ports of entry, the big airports, for example. Some of them had very long lines this weekend," she told a breakfast event organised by Politico.


When pressed for specifics she cited Chicago's O'Hare, Atlanta's Hartfield-Jackson and Los Angeles International Airport (LAX), adding: "I don't mean to scare, I mean to inform."




"We haven't had any slowdowns at all," said Marshall Lowe, a spokesman for LAX. Mr Lowe said that he had been on duty over the weekend and received no reports of unusual security delays.


DeAllous Smith, a spokesman for Hartfield-Jackson, said: "There have been no abnormally long lines at the security checkpoint nor unusual aircraft delays at Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport as a result of sequestration."


Their comments were echoed by Karen Pride, the director of media relations at Chicago Department of Aviation, who described operations at O'Hare as "normal" with "no unusual delays or cancellations".




The Obama administration has been repeatedly accused of exaggerating the impact of the $85 billion in cuts as it seeks to pressure Republicans in Congress into replacing them with a mixture of spending reductions and tax rises.




The Department of Homeland Security (DHS) did not immediately return a request for comment on Ms Napolitano's claim.




Jean Medina, a spokeswoman for Airlines for America, the airline industry's trade group, also contradicted Ms Napolitano's claim. "We're not seeing any impact at the moment," Ms Medina said. "Our biggest problem this week is going to be weather rather than the sequester."




"I haven't heard of anything like that at all," ...


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icanhasbailout's picture

As long as it doesn't cut into the part of the budget that buys the 2700 tanks and billion hollow-point rounds, it'll be fine.

WayBehind's picture

Who the heck is Janet Napolitano? Who cares about her. Shut your dirty British mouth you biach and keep your liberal agenda for UK. We are already fucked enough and dont need your false rumours. 

old naughty's picture



and again, what do muppets know?

hedgeless_horseman's picture



I heard the interview when Janet made these claims, and she said something along the lines of, "Please don't yell at the TSA agents...the Sequester isn't their fault."  Fucking grow up, lady.  

Just like our fat Surgeon General, Janet was clearly not given the job for her abilities, or her looks.  

Mactheknife's picture

Let's just point out that it is a crime for you to lie to the government... who supposedly work for you... it's time that law should apply to the government...just sayin

FEDbuster's picture

She backed Obama over Hillary when the race was still a toss up, that's why she got the DHS top job.  They should have just made her ambassador to Mexico, but no she held out for a cabinet level position.  Thankfully she left AZ, but her replacement here (Jan Brewer) may be dumber than Napolitano.  AZ has a long history of bad governors, almost as bad as Illinois.

fourchan's picture

lol obama made her look like an even bigger fucking fool and lacky joke than she is. what a doormat!

Kirk2NCC1701's picture

I asked Lt. Uhura what she thought of her.  Uhura: "She sucks."  Not Uhura's type either, it seems.

eatthebanksters's picture

Who thinks this shit up?  Valerie Jarrett and her Chicago cronies?

booboo's picture

it was thought up along time ago, SOP for statist. You know you have stuck a put when it starts squealing.

All Risk No Reward's picture

Come on Freddie, Obama loves the children.  You saw him shed that tear for the children.  Well, you saw him pause and wipe that dry eye - and that counts for something.

Just turn in those guns little man, big daddy government will take care of you.

The Big Finance Capital Debt Money Tyranny promoting UN loves you - especially when you impoverished.

We at the UN respect the "right" of humanity that we say you can have, unless we say you can't have them...  but don't worry, you won't actually read the Universal Declaration of Human Rights that say we can take your rights anytime we want to, will you?

Article 29
(3) These rights and freedoms may in no case be exercised contrary to the purposes and principles of the United Nations.

It is soo much easier being a chump.

Now, turn in your guns.... those 2 billion bullets we are buying for DHS are just for target practice.

Those little old "no hesitation" targets of children, pregnant women and grandpa that we ordered are to teach our men and women not to hesitate to not shoot such targets.

Promise - and we'd never lie to you.

We are the government.

Now drink your neurotoxins because we said so and we hired Edward Bernays to dupe almost all the doctors and dentists into promoting the inclusion of a neurotoxin into the drinking water supply.  Enjoy those lost IQ points and increased risk of cancer - but think of the profits Big Pharma will make!

You love Big Pharma right?  They care so much about you.

Now stop being negative towards government because that's a mental illness and will give us the right to take your guns away with our fully automatic Personal Defense Weapons.

El Oregonian's picture

If I didn't know any better I'd say you were Alex Jones...

Go Tribe's picture

How do these ugly women get hired?

bigkahuna's picture

Nothing wrong with ugly. She is a sycophant, just like the rest of the cabinet. Ugly actually suits people like her, Kagan, Sotomeyor, Reno, Hillary, Wasserman-Schultz, Albright. While it would be nice if they were attractive, it might mess it all up if they were attractive.

Plus she just got done getting run over by a bus right?

NoDebt's picture

Somehow I knew that sequestration's effect would boil down to counting how long the lines would be at the airport.  I love that it's JUST NOT HAPPENING.  Makes you wonder how much else we could trim with no visible effects.

Airport security screenings..... if you've already waited 2 hours, what's another 2 minutes?  You're just going to sit on the runway for 3 more hours before takeoff anyway.  Border security..... if there already isn't any would you notice if there was less of it?  Etc., etc.

But we got Drones coming out our ass.  Yessir.  No damned shortage of those!  There was an article on Yahoo! (yes, freaking Yahoo!) talking about sightings of a drone over NYC... complete with pictures of it!  Fortunately there were no missiles visible under the wings, but still.


slightlyskeptical's picture

And that drone has now come up missing. They are curently asking for its return. It has to make you laugh.

bigkahuna's picture

The sequestration probably sped up the line.

prains's picture



this doesn't sound like a good time to bring up ronald reagan and the epitomy of falsehood that was his life and legacy.

i'll wait over here until you're ready

kito's picture



dhs didnt purchase these street tanks............im all for seeing the dismantling of a totally wasteful domestic army, but i also believe in facts.....or else you wind up exactly like the people you criticize..................

lincolnsteffens's picture

I'm gonna get me one of them WWII surplus big ass tanks and park it right next to my bedroom window.

I'm gonna keep the battery charged and at least 10 minutes worth of fuel in it (that should only be about

100 gallons). If they come for me and I can get in it and start er up I'm gonna scare the krap out of the

MF userpers of my Constatutionalle Rahts. Damn!  Ammo or not, wait till I swing that turret around.


Just Kidding guys, honest!!!

Hey.... who's that braking down my door? Uh Oh, quick response team....arghhh!! Gak.....

Nobody For President's picture

I don't get all the down arrows Kito - there is enough documented bad shit going around these days you don't need to make shit up.

The DHS / 2700 tanks is made up. Why spread rumors when the Holder letter to Ryan is public info, and enough Constitution shitting on to maybe even wake up a few more sheeple? Some folks can't stand facts that interfere with there made up minds.

Shit, the amount of ammo is for real, you don't HAVE to add 'tanks'.

Sheesh ZH hard core, get a fucking grip and spread the REAL shit around, you don't have to spread the made-up-not-true-rumors.

El Oregonian's picture

She/it needs to be sequestered.

nmewn's picture

lol...gawd someone please tell me Jack Murtha Airport won't be shut down because of sequestration!

An old article...but just like old laws, the funding of bureacracy set in motion NEVER stops...

"Republicans had their Bridge to Nowhere in Alaska, and now Democrats seem intent on wrapping themselves firmly around Congressman Jack Murtha's Airport for No One in Johnstown, Pennsylvania. So much for changing the culture of spending in Washington.

Last week 53 Senators—including 51 Democrats—voted down an amendment by Republican Jim DeMint of South Carolina to stop spending federal funds on the airport that Mr. Murtha built with more than $150 million in federal subsidies and earmarks over the last two decades. (The Republicans voting against Mr. DeMint were Kit Bond and George Voinovich, neither of whom is running for re-election.) The airport has three daily commercial flights, and those are to Washington, D.C. The federal subsidies average $100 for each of the fewer than 30 passengers who use the airport each day, which means it would be cheaper for taxpayers to buy a train ticket for Mr. Murtha and other Washington D.C.-bound travelers than to keep the airport open.

Pennsylvania's two Senators, Democrats Arlen Specter and Robert P. Casey, Jr., denounced the DeMint amendment because it singled out one airport."


Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

Krugman would be proud! Maybe (illegal) aliens can invade and ruin the airport, and it will double the jobs created. 

nmewn's picture

Saved OR Created...its really the best of both alien worlds ;-)

Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

Maybe it's a chinese ghost airport? Filled with the souls of employed people past? 

mkhs's picture

Ain't Arlen dead?  The story is from 2009.  Murtha also bought the farm. 

Are  they still collecting the Johnstown flood tax?

Antifaschistische's picture

what I don't get...

..how does going from 7 TSA agents standing around doing absolutely nothing, to 6 TSA agents standing around doing absolutely nothing, make the lines go slower.

....seems to me, like the only thing that slowed down entry into an airport IS THE TSA...how bassackwards is that!!

Fire 100% of them and there won't be ANY line!!

slightlyskeptical's picture

I am not sure in this day of communication why the reps even need to come to DC. Wouldn't they all serve us better (and cheaper) if they remained in their home states with their constituents?

lincolnsteffens's picture

Sounds like the Sarasota Fla. airport since it was built 20+ years ago. Well it is pretty nice looking

neat and quiet for an airport.

Xibalba's picture

in desperate need of more dildo!

The Shootist's picture

Not old skunk head... Barf.

Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

She's a woman or a granny-tranny. Whatever it is, she's banging the help double time. Coming soon, the Predator dildo, which can be used on Americans on American soil.

Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

And the dildo will be held by Eric Hold-it-for-er........... Fast and Furious #1 and #2

nmewn's picture

+1 for Predator Dildo's.

Heat seeking, able to operate effectively in the dark, with the ability to penetrate hard to reach, overlooked targets one would presume ;-)

a growing concern's picture

I've got a mental image for you: Janet Napolitano dressed in SS garb reaming Hillary Clinton in the ass with that Predator dildo.

Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

I love that reading it, I hear Archer's voice!

Scro's picture

I can't wait till that treasonous cunt meets the hang mans noose.

buzzardsluck's picture

Stupid fucking CUNT, that's all.


Stop showing her fucking picture as well, its like janet reno all over again.