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Wednesday Humor: Career Advice (From Hank Paulson)
We can only imagine the lines around the block in readiness for this Chicago Booth lecture "Career Advice From Hank Paulson" urging students not to obsess about positioning themselves for the top job - or perhaps, as we might sub-title it, "Don't obsess - your efforts to make $478m tax-free like me are completely futile."
"When you’re making a decision in a real crisis, you don’t worry about public criticism."
What advice do you think the 'honorable' former Treasury Secretary might have in his private moments?
(h/t Alex Gloy)
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His name was Henry Paulson! His name was Henry Paulson!...
Fuck Hank Paulson. I am suprised he is out in public. He should be banned to Jamie Dimon's island bug out location. On second thought, I will defer to LongSoupLine for a fitting punishment.
He should be in a very small cell with J.D. for a very longtime, maybe flip a coin and let one eat the other Alfred Packer style.
Drag a hundred dollar bill through Hyde Park and you never know what you will find.
(oh yeah.. Obama.. Ayers.. now this guy. I guess Kyle was slumming last week)
You can't hide - we WILL find you.
And we are NOT "tax paying units" asshole.
We WILL find you. RUN!
Good to know Paulson is still hard at work destroying America. No doubt he's trying to move more American jobs to China, cut carbon in America while burying China in pollution, figuring out how to get a one child policy implemented in America (excluding the dElites like himself, of course), figuring out how to establish the international banking cartel he bows to set up as global authoritarian rulers.
At least this demon is consistent.
Until the average American gets their head out of their throat (that far up their *ss), this kind of filth still feel comfortable talking to students.
how can you say that about a true movie hero....did you not see the factual documentary presented by andrew sorkin. he is also an expert on that morning business show.....so you know its true....
i am also going to wait till the end were i can double my order by just paying shipping and handling...oh and the extra lids...
If I die of old age, these fuckers - Paulson, Dimon, Geithner, Soros, Buffet - are going to pass before me. My bucket list includes pissing on each of their graves. If no one's watching, I'll take a dump as well.
But that is only in death does he get his name back.
I suppose it would be asking too much to see him arrested on stage.
"Throw money at DC and they will be your bitch, show your superiors on wall street that you will ass rape your clients at will and you will rise up the corporate ladder like a phoenix of hell fire."
During the crisis, Paulson sometimes was criticized for shifting his tactics, but more recent assessments have credited the former Treasury Secretary with heading off catastrophic damage to the economy.
They left out: ... heading off catastrophic damage to the economy, resulting in kicking the can to someone else's watch and facilitating what will become known as the largest financial implosion ever experienced on this mudball.
There... fixed it for you.
Fuck you Hank
Dear Hank,
Die in a fire.
Sincerely,
Those US Citizens who aren't banksters
Hank looks like he's spent his entire life puckering up for a thirteen minute long treble C on the trombone
is john bryants fault he brought us hank paulson.......shoulda just kept on baking
and stayed off the squids exec comm
I hate that snake oil salesman. one day a snake will bite him and he will diea slow death.
Suprisingly, you might be right:
http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/fortune_archive/2004/01/12/357911...
His wife's remark: "He had that snake look in his eyes".
Yes, a slow death.
Poor snake!
One word: surplus.
How did he make that much you say? Easy, he just sold his country to the FED/WALL STREET.
A phenomenal, world class piece of shit, deserving only of the scorn of all honest men. Perhaps, someday, justice will be done.
"When you’re making a decision in a real crisis, you don’t worry about public criticism."
That's what I tried to tell my wife when she found out I spent the rent money on smokes and booze....
I don't know why but this reminds me of something......
"It's easy to grin when your ship comes in
and you've got the stock market beat.
But the man worthwhile is the man who can smile
when his shorts are too tight in the seat."
[laughs] "Ok, pookie. Do the honors."
Get your foot off the boat!
"You scratched my anchor!"
+1 for reference to Caddyshack :)
He's got that going for him.
Which is nice!
He's got that going for him.
Which is nice!
"How To Relocate To Peurto Rico". By Hank Paulson
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2013-03-11/paulson-parting-puerto-rico-pre...
John Paulson
Wrong Paulson there, Yen.
Or IS it?!?!!
I'm right fellas. They are two(Paulsons) peas in a pod though.
Wrong Paulson...This is John Paulson, architect of the Magnatarian "lets create toxic waste and short it".
Snap this stuttering fuckers other 9 fingers and than clawback that tax free HALF BILLION. Finally Pay per view him in a fight to the death cage against Corzine.
That's not sporting -- Paulson would break Corzine's pencil neck in the first five seconds.
I say feed them both to the lions.
They are born, raised by psychopaths, go out into the world and destroy the quality of life of decent, hard-working people, then die. We could have done without that.
One moment longer with that is too long... There must be "the solution."
100 green candles for that post! We should've taken out their parents.
I wonder if he stutters like this when the kiddies ask him questions?
Sterns vs. Hank: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hhPvas-Q8Y
Sterns vs. Hank: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtjYBwgaAcw
Kaptur vs. Hank: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwU-d-RYYYg
Kucinich vs. Hank: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kOG-gVn4Ck
I have more respect for a day old piece of dogshit...
Agreed. Pinching a loaf is an honest day's work, at least. What Hank did.... not so much.
"Um, we need like a Trillion dollars by Thursday or we're all dead. No, seriously."
That line will work a few more times, then it won't. Looks like the Fed's QE has taken the place of government bailouts, in fact the Fed's QE is bailing out the government.
DHS is preparing for the day it all goes down, are you?
Hank's greatest triumph: Disproving the maxim You never negotiate with terrorists.
Chicago - you know people get shot there every minute. Perfect gun control is hitting your target.
The movie version of Hanky was much better than the real thing!
Red face, wild eyes, swetty, hands shaking, voice trembeling, looking guilty and lying his ass off. you know... Hank Paulson.
Fixed.
What advice do you think the 'dis-honorable' former Treasury Secretary might have in his private moments?
Goldman Sachs scumbag ,Wank Paulson!!!
The gov't will re-seed the disillusioned working class with new immigrants for a few years while the Fed prints into 2018. Stop looking for justice; I am sure the odds are higher for going to prison if you post on zerohedge versus getting convicted of stealing several generations of wealth because you think your Harvard degree makes your ideas "special". Harvard seems to represent a kind of hive of fraud-producing monsters.
I am sure the odds are higher for going to prison if you post on zerohedge
The time when that occurs nobody will want to live in the US. Fear the government and you have tyranny.
Talk to people whom have lived in communism where Soviet Soldiers bust into the homes and raped the women. People wanted to escape the country in droves. It's when there are border guards to keep people in the country. Travel outside the country is prohibited unless there's a special reason.
Do you think the government is going to "bust in" people's homes in places like East Los Angeles on 18th Street, and the ghettos of St. Louis and other cities? I think not. The police don't even go into these areas unless they are accompanied by a whole squad of cop cars. The Black and Mexican gang-bangers would kick our government's butt if the government ever pulled that on them.
It's cheaper to import Muppets, dispose-a-people then raise them here.
"There's no better job in the world than creating money out of thin air and giving it to yourself and your friends!"
Friend of someone who creates money out of thin air and gives it to you is better.
"When you’re making a decision in a real crisis, you don’t worry about public criticism."
Yes. The only thing to worry about is covering up the real reasons of the crisis, saving those who caused it and letting them run their destructive business further, all in order to keep the status quo running… thus paving the way for a much worse systemic crisis of the same sort. Good job, Hank.
"First we create a crisis then we offer the solution."
At least it took care of any conflict of interest...
LADIES: This man has 478 million dollars. Help him enjoy it, and show these guys how a pro makes 478 million tax free, legally.
Has this top banker and "technocrat" ever (st)uttered a coherent thought? While we'll be living the consequences of his shit storm "emergency" for generations, at least I hoped I'd never be asked to lay eyes on that psychopathic moron ever again. Pleeeeeeeeeease retreat to your grinch cave and stutter and drool over your stolen bailout money in private.
long snakes and reptiles.
Hank would say in a crisis, make sure you get a piece of the $270 million out of the money windfall option play for shutting down Bear Stearns. WmWFawell electanewcongress.com Serfs Up America!
Fuck Hank Paulson.
He is a traitor and should be dealt with as such.
Hanks advice 'Kids, stealing from GrandMa is Ok, but never write anything down on paper'.
U.S. Treasury has issued Hank Paulson bronze coins. I'm not kidding.
Because Career Advice From A Stuttering, Bug-eyed Ass Maggot wouldn't have had the same draw....
Dedicated to the $750Bilion extortion note that Paulson handed to Congress.....
There once was a stammering Hank
Who decided to hold up the bank,
But no words could he m..mm...muster
So he left in a fff..ff...fluster
And came back with a note and a ttt.tt..tank!
J--j-e-k-k-kyl Is-l-land, b-b-itchez.
NOT Jekyll Island, Hank Paulson owns 3/4 of THIS ONE "Little St. Simon's Island" off the coast of Georgia:
http://www.littlestsimonsisland.com/
"Survival of the fff...ff..fff...fittest."
Cut the head of the "Snake"
Hanky , Where you Been? MIA...for the past 4.5 years...Hi!
Thanks For Everything, especially the Net Capital Rule Exemption of 2004...Heckova Job!
u just want to take a showere when u read about these sonsofbitches
"hold your nose and go to omaha"