This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Europe Scrambling With Last Minute Revision To Cyprus Deposit Confiscation Plan

Tyler Durden's picture




 

If initially Europe came out as utterly deranged in its Cyprus deposit-confiscation scheme, at least it was consistent. Now, it appears that Europe is desperate to appear not only completely incompetent but also unable to even make a simple decision and stick with it, following news from both the WSJ and the FT that the original confiscation thresholds of 6.75% and 9.9% for deposits below and over €100,000 is about to be revised.

From the FT: "a revised deal being discussed in Nicosia, with the blessing of the European Commission, would shift more of the burden on to deposits larger than €100,000, according to officials involved in the talks. Under a controversial deal struck with international bailout lenders in the early hours on Saturday, a 6.75 per cent levy would be imposed on all deposits under €100,000 while accounts over that threshold would be hit with a 9.9 per cent levy. The depositor levy was demanded by a German-led group of creditor countries to bring down the bailout’s price tag from €17bn.... Officials involved in last night’s talks said the changes in the levy’s rates were in flux, but they could see the higher rate increase to as much as 12.5 per cent while the smaller deposits could be about 3.5 per cent."

Elsewhere, according to the WSJ, the deposit "tax" would be under 5% for deposits under €100K, under 10% for deposits between €100 and €500K, and over 13% for deposits greater than half a million.

While this idiotic last minute revision will only infuriate Russian oligarchs even more, it will achieve absolutely nothing to streamline the passage of the bill through Cyprus parliament where it appears to have hung without enough support: the damage has already been done, and it is a virtual guarantee that Cyprus banks will suffer a full blown bank run the second banks reopen, which may be Tuesday, Wednesday, or never, at the current pace. That line around the block at your local neighborhood Nicosia ATM: that is not, and will not, be for people seeking to make a deposit, that much we can guarantee, no matter what the final confiscation percentage is.

What is worse, however, is the painful demonstration of the absolutely and completely arbitrary decision-making process out of Europe. Sure: the ECB and the European Commission may decide to fully unwind the deposit confiscation scheme before all is said and done, but the genie is now out of the bottle, and it is very clear that in the European Disunion, a few unelected oligarchs will now determine until such time as the Eurozone finally implodes, just whose wealth and deposits are ripe for the taking. That not even Germany can make a decision and stick with it is just icing on the cake of the European Titanic.

In the meantime, what happens in Cyprus tonight, or tomorrow, and what the final confiscation schedule looks like, is merely bitter sweet victory for all those who have claimed that the European monetary experiment is finally coming to a long overdue end.

Finally, we can only hope that the next European (in whatever Monetary Union or Disunion format it is then) winter, is mild. Because Gazpromia may just decide to hike gas costs by 5%... or 6.75%.... or 9.9%.... or 99.9%.... Who knows? After all, Gazpromia Russia - which just happens to be Europe primary external source of crude and gas, has a green light to make up its own rules on the fly.

 

- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:33 | 3339546 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Did the trial balloon fail?  There will be smaller line-ups for cash if skewed toward the larger savings pool.

 

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:35 | 3339550 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Stalking horse is already out of the barn door, there is no getting him back in the stable now. As in "economic STABILITEEEE."

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:37 | 3339567 max2205
max2205's picture

1st plan was droned. Lol

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:54 | 3339652 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

THE EURO:  Giving a bad name to Chinese Cluster Fucks since 1999.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:00 | 3339677 flacon
flacon's picture

"Dis-confidence"

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:10 | 3339727 DJ Happy Ending
DJ Happy Ending's picture

Europe the great socialist utopia has no FDIC? LOL

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:43 | 3339834 knukles
knukles's picture

Well of course they do. 
You see it works like this...
The banks take deposits from customers.
The banks then make investments
In stuff like European sovereign debt
The Banks also made a buncha other bad loans
Which go bad along side the soverign debt getting sketchy
So they gotta be bailed out.
The countries in which the bad banks reside gotta bailout those bad banks which otherwise would fail
So the country has to raise MORE money from the banks to get the money to bail out the banks who made the bad loans in the sovereign debt in which they invested that went bad.
See, the Bank's insured by the country who's financed by the bank which is insured by the country.
So when all else fails the country takes the innocent bystander depositor's money as a tax to raise money for the country to bailout the bank so that the depositor's money will be safe.
And the politician doing all this shit keeps saying it's fixed.

Fucking amazing, no?

And this is why there are Bank Runs, money is kept under the mattress, gold and silver are preferred medium and why people really will probably start hanging bankers and politicians from lamp posts some day somewhere. 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:07 | 3339936 negative rates
negative rates's picture

That line in front of bank, it's not REAL buddy!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:11 | 3340111 TwoShortPlanks
TwoShortPlanks's picture

The 2013 Euro [Hegelian] Dialectic......Bank Runs!

A Green Light for the EU's plans for outright dictatorial powers, effectively expanding Monetary Union into Politico-Fiscal Union, is nothing less than a Euro-Wide coup d'état led by the IMF, WB and their parent entity, the BIS.

This has been an announcement by the friendly team at Agenda21: Your future, is OUR future, so may the odds be forever in your *scoff* favour!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 22:05 | 3340701 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

Why would anyone, anywhere keep more than a month's worth of expense money in a bank?  I don't trust brokerage accounts anymore after MF Global, let alone the Too Big To Jail banksters.  Stupid is, as stupid does.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:33 | 3340265 kentmills
kentmills's picture

Knuckles: +1 Meant to hit up arrow - sorry about junking ya. Quite a Gordian knot "we" have going. (Must. Invest. In. Stylus.)

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:46 | 3340295 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Thanks Knucks,

Whew! I guess I had it right after all.

I wasn't sure...because, ya know, It sounds kinda...um, crazy.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:13 | 3339729 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Jew vs. Jew = "all hilarity ensues'...

~~~

ALWAYS

Note: Don't try to be clever here and pretend 'Cypriot' muppets are actors in this game... Don't buy that sandwich...

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:48 | 3339861 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

somebody is very fuckskeed....were are you boris...i dont speak russian like you...

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:03 | 3339915 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Oh look... No 'JUNKS' on this thread until the word JEW appeared...

~~~

Quel surprise!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:20 | 3339986 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

Don't be so humble. There were no red arrows until you appeared. You got the power!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:27 | 3340016 Deacon Frost
Deacon Frost's picture

Sarris was employed at the World Bank starting in 1975.

Mon, 03/18/2013 - 02:33 | 3341311 StychoKiller
Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:20 | 3339739 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

The running meme amongst VSP (very silly people) like the Krugmans of the world is that the Cypress Job/Great Bank Heist was perpetuated because many large bank accounts in Cypress belonged to naughty Russians (expats living in Cypress or elsewhere) & those bank account balances were essentially the byproduct of ill-gotten gains (while Krugman doesn't bother to cite a single shred of data on this, economic or legal).

Krugman and his kind don't come out and explicitly state this, but it's absolutely implicit in what they've written on this topic, as is the implication that "this makes this EU imposed measure [i.e. complete textbook definition of the outright confiscation/taking of private property without an ounce of due process] that was backed by Cypress's joke of a government somewhat okay/understandable/sympathetic/non-egregious/maybe-even-commendable, etc."

For those who think I'm way off base, or even slightly off base for that matter, in thusly paraphrasing Krugman's views & opinions on this matter, whereby the Krugmans and VSPs bend over backwards to "sort of justify" grand larceny by the EU and the "government" of Cypress, I refer all to:

 The Cypriot Haircut' or what I like to simply refer to as Exhibit A of a long list of incontrovertible proofs that Krugman and others like him are total & absolute statists who only believe in "due process" or "property rights" when convenience serves the state, as nothing more than a trivial "privilege," and not anything remotely reflecting any "right," to be be suspended or revoked partially or completely at the whim of the state. In other words, little to nothing separates Krugman, despite his inevitable denials, for an absolute socialist even to the extent that he openly defends socialist practices carried out via communistic methods.

"OK, I didn’t see that one coming. With all the problems in Greece, Italy, Spain, and Portugal I wasn’t watching Cyprus. But that’s where the big euro news is this weekend; in return for a bailout, Cyprus is supposed to impose a large haircut — that is, loss — on all depositors in its banks.

 

You can sort of see why they’re doing this: Cyprus is a money haven, especially for the assets of Russian beeznessmen; this means that it has a hugely oversized banking sector (think Iceland) and that a haircut-free bailout would be seen as a bailout, not just of Cyprus, but of Russians of, let’s say, uncertain probity and moral character."

 

Forward!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:46 | 3339805 Element
Element's picture

I think we can see why they wanted it rubber-stamped by the parliament so bad before markets opened. They thought they could just ram it through, damn democracy, ramming speed!! ... failed ... freaked-out ... realized they were now caught with their draws around their ankles ... with Austral-Asia about to open ... so they went full-retard ... and ...

 

C O M P L E T E L Y   P A N I C K E D

 

unbelievable

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:53 | 3339878 asteroids
asteroids's picture

Dont YOU feel nervous right now? I suspect the markets feel a little sick to their stomachs.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:19 | 3339983 Element
Element's picture

Nope ... completely in my ... er ... Element.

Acceptance will come to you friend, and you'll feel a lot better once it finally does, good luck.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:43 | 3340074 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

I'd be shocked if there wasn't some version of an Animal Farm exemption from this state-enforced-for-the-benefit-of-private-bank-outright-theft for those who have a certain minimum of wealth also deposited at JP Morgan, Goldman Sachs, HSBC, USB, et al., by the way, since "some animals are more equal than others."

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 20:00 | 3340335 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Quite possible, nay , most probable.

However, what we are witnessing here has more elements of Animal House rather than Animal Farm.

"We gotta take these bastards. Now we could do it with conventional weapons, but that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody's part"

"We're just the guys to do it!"

 

Mon, 03/18/2013 - 02:39 | 3341315 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Not yer first rodeo, huh?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:59 | 3339902 Poor Grogman
Poor Grogman's picture

Perfect timing too

Some of the sheeple were getting confident in the system again.

Orders for PMs running hot this morning, phone calls taking a little longer than normal.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:53 | 3340319 mt paul
mt paul's picture

book your Carnival cruse

to Cyprus now..

 

cost plus 9.9 % fee

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 21:58 | 3340681 nmewn
nmewn's picture

ROTFL!!!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:36 | 3339817 auric1234
auric1234's picture

It's not confiscation because it's not taking private property, only worthless shit paper.

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:45 | 3339841 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

The worst part of a Krugman column (for me, anyway) is always the comments, and this one isn't an exception. You can see the poor little Krugman sycophants trying their best to rationalize government theft merely because Krugman gives tacit approval to the idea. It's an exercise in mental gymnastics.

These people are worse than sheep. The term "sheep" implies ignorance or a lack of thinking. These Krugman butthole-lickers believe they're intelligent simply because they 'follow' Krugman. It's basically a cult of personality at this point, and their entire worldview is dependent on their 'leader' being correct. These are usually the most dangerous people because they'll condone the most outlandish kinds of government tyranny as long as it comes with some sort of stamp of approval from the authority they trust.

"Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities." —Voltaire

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:09 | 3339950 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Do you see Krugman in the room?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:07 | 3340172 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

No, but you can smell him.  Take a good whiff and tell me you don't smell Krugman hiding out around here somewhere.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 20:05 | 3340348 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

I thought it might have been my dog.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:23 | 3340225 MS7
MS7's picture

People on thise site have made up this fictitious person named "Krugman" who is not to be confused with Paul Krugman of the NY Times. After all, Paul Krugman has consistently been arguing against the idiocy of recent EU and EC policies. His blog from today warns of a bank run in various EU countries as a result of this action. But go ahead and just read selective quotes from his work and continue to believe in your fictitious character called "Krugman".

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 22:49 | 3340846 slightlyskeptical
slightlyskeptical's picture

I agree that he has been very critical to the EU.

The problem here is that everyone disagrees with him on how the USA should handle things.

I agree that central banks should hold the countries debt. I disagree with them buying assets without providing the same relief to the people as they do the bankers.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:24 | 3340233 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

I believe the correct term for these Kruglickers is useful idiots.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:57 | 3340329 Jena
Jena's picture

"Kruglickers"  Perfect! 

And McMolotov, the commenters are worse than the column for me as well, too.  Sometimes I read them just as I scratch a mosquito bite:  I know it's not a good thing to do but sometimes I can't help myself.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 20:30 | 3340412 Apostate2
Apostate2's picture

Yes, indeed.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 21:55 | 3340674 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

Krugman approves theft by the State because his Tribe, via the Federal Reserve, owns the State. If Anglo-Saxons still controlled the State, he would be a raging Bolshevik.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:23 | 3339999 Antifaschistische
Antifaschistische's picture

I'm with you..but isn't there irony here.   The statist confiscator see's no problem with the haircut and finds it necessary.

Yet, the capitalist too will say, "you collected your fiat, handed it over to a banking institution and assumed it was riskless...shame on you, it wasn't"

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:48 | 3340091 q99x2
q99x2's picture

That's right.

From Jung 1957

The State in particular is turned into a quasi-animate personality from whom everything is expected. In reality it is only a camouflage for those individuals who know how to manipulate it. Thus the constitutional State drifts into the situation of a primitive form of society--the communism of a primitive tribe where everybody is subject to the autocratic rule of a chief or an oligarchy.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:17 | 3340206 MS7
MS7's picture

I really don't understand all the animosity on this site toward Krugman. Weird. Anyway, I wonder why you didn't quote the rest of the piece? Maybe because it contradicts what you claim Krugman believes? Here is the rest from his blog in the NY Times:

-----

"The big problem, however, is that it’s not just large foreign deposits that are taking a haircut; the haircut on small domestic deposits is a bit smaller, but still substantial. It’s as if the Europeans are holding up a neon sign, written in Greek and Italian, saying “time to stage a run on your banks!”

Tomorrow and the days immediately following should be very interesting."

------

For those who don't know, Krugman has been a very strong critic against practically everything the EU and EC have done in recent times.

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:43 | 3340290 malek
malek's picture

 For those who don't know, Krugman has been a very strong critic against practically everything the EU and EC have done in recent times.

I wonder why you didn't state the rest of his opinion?

It goes along the lines of "...instead the European central should print faster!" (Which is confiscation of everybody's assets, including small depositor's, by other means, but pssst - most won't notice!)

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 21:02 | 3340510 Augustus
Augustus's picture

Krugman has been a very strong advocate for suggesting that the US follow the EU model, 100%.

Issue more debt.

Provide more handouts.

"Invest" in more Solyndras.

The man is a fool.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:42 | 3340291 mt paul
mt paul's picture

savings account

killing drones..

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:49 | 3339620 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

On the basis of survivor reports, it seems that everyone who jumps off a bridge, regrets the decision about half way down.

That must be what these clowns are feeling now.  Good luck with those air brakes.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:56 | 3339646 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

Exactly. The runs are likely to be bigger if they decide not to impose the haircuts. Once the haircuts are imposed, depositors might just assume the worst is over and leave their deposits put. But if they decide against haircuts, everyone will want out to avoid even the potential of a haircut.

Good luck un-ringing that bell...

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:05 | 3339696 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

Perception is reality:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coDtzN6bXAM

(see: 0:56)

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:05 | 3339706 machineh
machineh's picture

Greeks already know: they never haircut just once.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:38 | 3339823 akak
akak's picture

A 'haircut' is actually a scalping when one is already fully shorn.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:57 | 3340330 Go Tribe
Go Tribe's picture

Spread 'em bitchez!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:34 | 3339554 Selah
Selah's picture

 

 

Trial balloon fail.

Two steps forward, one step back.

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:45 | 3339609 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

They'll drop it to 2% and everyone will be happy.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:45 | 3339610 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

They'll drop it to 2% and everyone will be happy.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:53 | 3339650 CH1
CH1's picture

They'll drop it to 2% and everyone will be happy.

Maybe, but they made a GIANT error: The EU elite showed their true face.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:18 | 3339741 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

"Oh, only 2%? I can still afford iPhoneN, yeah? Alright, go ahead."

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:36 | 3339559 Abraxas
Abraxas's picture

Look, we were going to take 10% from you, but now we will take only 8%, therefore you ACTUALLY GAIN 2% of all your deposits. Aren't you sorry you didn't have more money in the account?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:39 | 3339582 SWCroaker
SWCroaker's picture

I want my two dollars!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:46 | 3340086 hidingfromhelis
hidingfromhelis's picture

One three day weekend, two tiers of taxation.  Plus tip.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:01 | 3339688 cpzimmon
cpzimmon's picture

What's the capitol gain tax in Cyprus on two percent of a deposit? 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:04 | 3339689 cpzimmon
cpzimmon's picture

What's the capital gain tax in Cyprus on two percent of a deposit? 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:09 | 3339721 akak
akak's picture

Probably, six percent of that deposit.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:40 | 3340281 Hughing
Hughing's picture

Now you're talking REFUND! We can print that as green jobs for Cyprus!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:45 | 3340294 mt paul
mt paul's picture

you are " allowed "

to carry a small knife now

on the airplane now..

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:37 | 3339566 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

you don't really need to stand in line to cause a bank run these days. a few clicks, a code entry, and your money's now in Frankfurt.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:44 | 3339594 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

this article is disingenuos. all the FinMin group (from 16 countries) and the ECB can do is a proposal - they can't force the Cypriot parliament to do what the Cypriot president and the Cypriot national bank governor agreed to and are endorsing - in order to save Cypriot banks that operated under Cyprot supervision

after all, they are offering 10bn if Cyprus can chip 7bn themselves

is the new proposal really that worse? we'll see

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:47 | 3339616 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Parliament will keep voting on the same bill until the desired outcome is achieved.

Speaking of which - CISPA was recently reintroduced. What a fucking surprise.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:28 | 3339791 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

CISPA - If Facebook likes it, so should we all.

/sarc

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:57 | 3340328 SDShack
SDShack's picture

Kinda like TARP

Mon, 03/18/2013 - 01:57 | 3341273 mt paul
mt paul's picture

comment removed by CISPA

pending review by DHS...

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:13 | 3339931 Element
Element's picture

 

 

this article is disingenuos. all the FinMin group (from 16 countries) and the ECB can do is a proposal

Do you not get what's happened here, those banks are roadkill. This proposal is irrelevant as is the parliamentry rubber stamp. It's all moot, yes or no now makes no difference. Those banks are damaged-goods and everyone is going to want out of them. This was predictable, foreseeable, obvious.

What the article is demonstrating is entirely salient and essential reporting, it's what people need to know about what's been going on. The whole process was supposedly, to save these banks and the national banking system, but what it's done is the opposite, condemned them to the dust bin.

This is beyond a FAIL. It's a cautionary tale - one for the hystery books.

Hey, here's an idea, why not devalue them and flog them off to Greece? ... which is what they apparently wanted to do!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:39 | 3340065 Banksters
Banksters's picture

Spot on.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:50 | 3339631 Scro
Scro's picture

Who you tryin' to get crazy with ese? Don't you know I'm loco?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:52 | 3339640 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

The only thing the EU is missing is its own military force.  Maybe US military manufactures will get a bump when trading opens on Monday.  Long drone manufacturers!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:06 | 3339707 jus_lite_reading
jus_lite_reading's picture

Greetings my fellow ZeroHedgers from the west coast! It's 2pm here and I'm more than excited to tell you all that the time many of you have been waiting for, for years has finally arrived. Yes--- ZERO HOUR is upon the global financial system. 

As many of the old timers here know, I have not posted in over a year as I said, all preperations are now complete- relocation and such takes time.

For me to come out of my "bunker" means a major event has occured. No matter the outcome of the vote, all confidence in paper assets and allocation of such in banks has now been obliterated. I can't say much at this point other than, "Cyprus" is the "answer in Cancer" and that I hope you fools prepared long in advance for what is about to occur......

I know that some of you became disillusioned and complacent because the "collapse" of the global ponzi did not occur when you expected it and some of you even wrote me emails that you believed the financial crisis was over. Shame on you! I told you all, it will be like a "thief in the night" when it arrives with little warning. The time to prepare has come to a close -> many "bank holidays" are just ahead!! September 2012... the month it all began!

I wish you all the best! 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:41 | 3339835 Tao 4 the Show
Tao 4 the Show's picture

Thanks for peeking out from your bunker for a comment. You may be right, though the pace of events is difficult to gauge given the intertia and deliberate dampening by all sources official. Will be interesting to watch.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:19 | 3339748 xtop23
xtop23's picture

There's a shock .... hey lets play the class warfare card guys.... it's working so well in the US.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:39 | 3340063 TraderTimm
TraderTimm's picture

Cyprus bitcoin users unaffected.

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 23:52 | 3341040 One World Mafia
One World Mafia's picture

That they are robbing a smaller percentage will do nothing to restore confidence. Would you trust your valuables to a crook that stole only a toaster from your home because he had trouble getting the tv out the door? He knows the tv is there and will be back to get it when he figures out how.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:33 | 3339547 Edward Fiatski
Edward Fiatski's picture

Please don't gas-price-raise-me, bro.

Regarding the alleged adjusted thresholds - theft is still theft. We still open red today.

Have a nice day.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:34 | 3339551 Wile-E-Coyote
Wile-E-Coyote's picture

Reported in the Cyprus Mail newspaper.

Money will be cut from accounts by Tuesday morning http://www.cyprus-mail.com/bailout/money-will-be-cut-accounts-tuesday-morning/20130317

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:34 | 3339553 Croesus
Croesus's picture

HAHA........they fucked up bad, and they know it!

Europeans......START YOUR BANK RUNS!

Bring this motherfucker down!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:40 | 3339585 bank guy in Brussels
bank guy in Brussels's picture

Yes, bring this hopeless shite euro-zone down crashing into pieces

The euro is as big of a failure as was US Prohibition of all alcoholic drinks, 1920-34 ... lasted about as long, too

And bravo to ZeroHedge for the BEST coverage of all of this

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:52 | 3339644 machineh
machineh's picture

History repeats ... first as tragedy, then as FARCE.

Bring on the euro-clownz!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:42 | 3339596 docj
docj's picture

I'm sure this will end well.

I cannot wait until King Putt and the rest of the DC Insane Clown Possee start going after IRA's and 401K's here, perhaps as early as later this year

Let it burn.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 20:25 | 3340398 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Haha,

Maybe we can get WB7 to do a lil Juggal-O-bama.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 22:24 | 3340770 Meat Hammer
Meat Hammer's picture

KING PUTT!  Oh shit that's funny.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:44 | 3339598 debtor of last ...
debtor of last resort's picture

Sorry. My fiat is all in the metals. Or do you think another €300,- would do the trick? It's raining, but i will make an exception if you can convince me.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:34 | 3339555 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

  It could be ONE € of confiscation, and I still have ZERO faith in the European banking system. It's corrupt and broken!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:36 | 3339563 Edward Fiatski
Edward Fiatski's picture

This weekend marks the end of trust & confidence, if there still was any left in the muppets' worldview.

Welcome to reality.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:49 | 3339628 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

they've finally done it... they've swollowed reality whole-- now's the hard part of divvying up the carcass

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:59 | 3339684 Tirpitz
Tirpitz's picture

Actually the opposite is happening:

EU deposit insurance covers - only - 100,000 EUR per head, per bank. Now the Russian Mafia can be confident to still see roughly 90% of their ill-gotten gains being handed back to them from the broken banking system which helped them launder their blood money. Entirely legally.

Sometimes reality plays in more grotesque ways than any play script ever could do.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:07 | 3339713 Edward Fiatski
Edward Fiatski's picture

How the fuck is it 90% on an account with, say, 5 million? Get the hell out of here.

And Russians again? Get the fuck out of here doubly.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:34 | 3339556 Tinky
Tinky's picture

Oh, you're only going to steal 3.5% of my savings? What a relief! Thank you so much!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:36 | 3339565 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

As in "Let me relieve you of that 3.5% of your savings."

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:44 | 3339606 magpie
magpie's picture

I'm turning Argentinian, i really think sooooo

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:50 | 3339630 akak
akak's picture

Constant confiscation-adjusted total bank funds prove that there is no bank fund confiscation.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:55 | 3339658 machineh
machineh's picture

Ay-yi-yi-yi ...

I am the euro ban-di-to!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:47 | 3339613 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

This time........

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:52 | 3339635 Cheesy Bastard
Cheesy Bastard's picture

As in "Let me relieve you of that 3.5% of your savings."

I would prefer to relieve myself, thank you anyway.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:35 | 3339557 JustObserving
JustObserving's picture

If at first you do not succeed, try to make it worse.  May I suggest 0% deposit confiscation for assets under 100,000 euros before you embarrass yourself more?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:41 | 3339592 SWCroaker
SWCroaker's picture

Whatever.   Money out, body gone, you boneheads can try this on someone else next time.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:44 | 3339605 css1971
css1971's picture

Um but that means the levy on the assets over 100,000 will have to be much much larger because there are far far fewer of them.. It would have to be something like 100%.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:02 | 3339694 Tirpitz
Tirpitz's picture

That won't hurt too many of the citizen class...

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:08 | 3339716 css1971
css1971's picture

How many assassins can you buy for a million Euros? How much does a car bomb cost?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:45 | 3339608 Jim B
Jim B's picture

Message to Eurozone bank customers, take your money out of any and all banks! 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:36 | 3339558 magpie
magpie's picture

Pretty transparent now, they will do it again as a wealth tax. That was the plan all along.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:40 | 3339570 Edward Fiatski
Edward Fiatski's picture

Yes, and Italy along with other countries will receive "More flexible, competitive Wealth Theft Rates".

Relax & enjoy.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:35 | 3339561 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

why don't they just confiscate it all, and then shoot everyone afterwards? problem solved.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:03 | 3339701 JustObserving
JustObserving's picture

That's what they did with Libya's 140 tons of gold.  Too many Russian oligarchs and Putin in the way in Cyprus.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:06 | 3339711 gwar5
gwar5's picture

That's what socialized medicine is for. No healthcare for anybody wounded by a .40 caliber hollow point. 

 

Wicked Witch of the West: "These things must be done veeery delicately."

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:45 | 3339845 e-recep
e-recep's picture

if you starve off the slaves, who will take care of the chores?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:49 | 3340303 JohnnyBriefcase
JohnnyBriefcase's picture

Robots bruh.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:36 | 3339562 machineh
machineh's picture

ZH 1, EU 0.

Feel the rage, fucktards!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:39 | 3339573 debtor of last ...
debtor of last resort's picture

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_natural_gas_proven_res...

Well, i don't think cold feet will be the problem in the Netherlands. Maybe angry floating piigs will.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:39 | 3339576 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

One never forgets being robbed...

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:52 | 3339643 donethat
donethat's picture

Especially if a gun is pointed at you. Been there.

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:53 | 3339645 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

A conservative is a liberal who has been mugged.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:58 | 3339675 machineh
machineh's picture

A euroskeptic is a europhile who's been stability levied.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:39 | 3339578 max2205
max2205's picture

What are those circuit breakers again?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:40 | 3339583 e m m
e m m's picture

It's okay, some refinements and wait & see before moving on to pensions.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:42 | 3339587 falak pema
falak pema's picture

TD : to be fair its no more arbitrary and incoherent than the US congress trying to decide on a budget or on taxes and government cuts! 

Its a crazy world! As the size of debt is beyond their comprehension on either side of the pond.

Keep the press running!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:41 | 3339589 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Why are Bernanke and the ECB choosing not to bail this problem out?  Why is the choice being made to steal money from people.  The cartel exists to print money for these problems.  That is the whole point of the Fed and the ECB, they are supposed to give money to banks so the system doesn't collapse.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:43 | 3339600 Jim B
Jim B's picture

Fing criminals! 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:22 | 3339768 OccupyTVstations
OccupyTVstations's picture

from an editorial in the Cypress Mail

President Anastasiades had emphatically declared in his inauguration speech that “absolutely no reference to a haircut on public debt or deposits will be tolerated,” adding that “such an issue isn’t even up for discussion.”..

It is obvious from the statements made that Anastasiades was blackmailed into accepting this euphemistically called ‘solidarity levy’.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:36 | 3339820 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

That's certainly one interpretation.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:50 | 3339624 SDShack
SDShack's picture

Because their goal is not to print money, but to make the citizens slaves. If they take everything from you, then they think you have to come to them to survive. It's called slavery and they want to be your masters.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:56 | 3339663 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Probably.  But the original evil plan was just to make sure the bankers never went out of business.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:09 | 3339720 Tirpitz
Tirpitz's picture

The basic plan is the same as usual: let the common citizen pay for the mega-billionaire oligarchs.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:14 | 3339726 SDShack
SDShack's picture

Bankers by their nature are cannibals. They will gladly eat each other because that is how the survivers grow. Kill of the weak and feed off it. Survival of the fittest. Why do you think Bear Sterns and Lehman were allowed to fail? The stronger ones couldn't wait to pick over the carcass and get the best cuts for themselves. They have no desire to just try to stay in business, they only exist to grow. And in todays world, they can only grow with bubbles, bailouts, and takeovers. Bubbles were done in the '90's & early 2000's, bailouts in 2008-Present. Now it's cull the herd. The New World Order reset can't happen until their are only a handful of players left on the global stage.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:58 | 3339678 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Seems like someone, probably the Germans, are just sick and tired of this shit.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:43 | 3339840 SDShack
SDShack's picture

Yep, and don't forget there is an election in Germany this summer. I think Merkel knows the German people are fed up so she is taking a hard line. The issue is will the EU make it to the summer?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:22 | 3339763 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Benny says- "Oh for fuck sakes, I can print that in a 1/2 hour." What's the problem?"

 

Fuck You Bernanke

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:41 | 3339590 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

They can't be this fucking stupid, can they? 

They are baffling me with bullshit! Ahhhh!!

I see confused stampeding lemmings, over this cliff, no over that cliff...

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 21:17 | 3340560 aka_ces
aka_ces's picture

Nice polar-allusion to a Thomas Dolby lyric, whether intended or not.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:41 | 3339591 Ineverslice
Ineverslice's picture

 

Gentelemen, please...the Marquis of Queensbury Rules will be observed at all times!

 

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:57 | 3339666 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

Protect yourself at all times.

Let's get it on! -- Mills Lane

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:04 | 3339704 css1971
css1971's picture

Those rules killed boxing. Western martial arts were easily a match for eastern, and a useful form self defence till they put the gloves on and civilised it all.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:43 | 3339599 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

Super!

and what's for dinner tomorrow?... gulag[sh]

tomorrow, tomorrow,... we love ya tomorrow, your only a day's away?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:43 | 3339601 Scalaris
Scalaris's picture

 

Well lookie here; I was €4 grand lighter this morning and I now find that my benevolent masters will allow me to have more of my money for myself.

Anything to save the banks though, hell I'll even donate what's not taken through extralegality from my own deposits.

'Cause nothing says supranational cohesion like Grand Larceny children.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:43 | 3339602 Critical Path
Critical Path's picture

theft under the guise of taxation, regardless of the degree, is still theft.  Europe showing that things are actually getting significantly worse, not that any of this is new to anyone who has been paying attention.  I hope they've just opened Pandora's Box.  Fuck them and this horrible system

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:46 | 3339611 caimen garou
caimen garou's picture

where the fuck is million dollar butthole and fucking paul the asshole krugman with the world is saved attitude now! fuck the both of them as our dictator in chief eats away at our wealth here at home and the sad part is that some many IDIOTS dont even know it's happening! shot of moonshine anyone!

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 19:33 | 3340262 MS7
MS7's picture

When did Krugman say the EU saved the world?!? He has been railing about the idiocy of how they have handled the crisis from the beginning.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:49 | 3339623 EARLPEARL
EARLPEARL's picture

stealing from savers is going to scare ALL SAVERS....this is NOT GOOD. SILVER AND GOLD COINS WILL GO FAST.......GET YOU SOME WHILE YOU CAN

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:49 | 3339626 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

sounds like the Paul Ryan budget plan

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:51 | 3339633 besnook
besnook's picture

so no one has figured out that the people have figured out that they should never ever deposit money in cyprus banks(or anywhere else in the eurozone) ever again? that it is better to deposit money in the bank of mattress in the form of anything but paper issued by .gov? that now the banks can never open because anyone with a brain will withdraw their money so they may as well just take all the money on deposit?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 17:23 | 3339773 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

This just in:

Corzine Joins ECB Directors' Board.

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 18:54 | 3340116 new guy
new guy's picture

European banks have just been given the death penalty. What comes next?

Sun, 03/17/2013 - 16:52 | 3339642 11811
11811's picture

 

"Absolutely, there is no capital restrictions, people can move. We hope people will believe us, believe the collective leadership of the European Union, that this was a necessary step, but a single shot at the problem, and that from now on they can be very confident that nothing will happen to their savings," Sarris said in Brussels.

Sarris had previously insisted that any bank bailout would not include confiscation of deposits. 

 

http://www.cnbc.com/id/100560892

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!