• Tim Knight from...
    04/28/2016 - 00:27
    I was expecting a few boring candidate statements of the U.S. Senate - AKA the World's Most Exclusive Club - but, boy, was I wrong. Just take a look at some of these gems.
  • Tim Knight from...
    04/28/2016 - 00:27
    I was expecting a few boring candidate statements of the U.S. Senate - AKA the World's Most Exclusive Club - but, boy, was I wrong. Just take a look at some of these gems.

Cyprus Finance Minister Resigns, President Refuses To Accept Resignation

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Update: President Anastasiades rejects FinMin Sarris' resignation. Unclear what happens next.

Things just took a turn for the much worse following this news from Market News:

  • CYPRUS FINANCE MINISTER SUBMITS RESIGNATION - SOURCES
  • MARKET NEWS CITES SOURCES ON CYPRUS FINANCE MINISTER

Unclear if German FinMin Schauble will promptly step in to fill this latest sovereign vacancy.

Desperation time for the NY Fed to preserve the market green and give the impression that all is under control, when the rats are now actively leaving the Titanic.

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Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:37 | 3347288 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Goldman Sachs crony to be appointed in 3...2...1.....

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347306 redpill
redpill's picture

Yep now they'll just stick in whomever they want.  DOW/S&P to end green for sure.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347312 fourchan
fourchan's picture

whats calamari in greek?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347340 redpill
redpill's picture

????????

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347358 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

Cyprions don't even understand what's going on. They're not "losing" their deposits. The money is temporarily underwriting the equity of some if the world's most reputable banks. When the equity appreciates, depositors will be paid back in full.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347369 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Ok, that makes TOTAL sense.  Unlawfully seize my money now, cuz you'll pay me later.  lol.

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:10 | 3347519 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

It's the same concept as social security moron. Do you disagree with that too? Even though its running a surplus if IOUs?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:22 | 3347598 Tsukato
Tsukato's picture

Rock him like a hurricane MDB! Besides, I don't see what everyone's so excited about. These are the days we've all been waiting so long for. BURN BABY BURN!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:31 | 3348179 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

Rumor has it, that Jon Corzine is on a plane right now headed to Cyprus.  Looks like a replacement with the proper experience for the Finance Minister position has been found.  

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:25 | 3347623 Tsukato
Tsukato's picture

In fact, yesterday I built a small shrine in my living room, where I'm actively making offerings and sacrifices to the god of contagion. 20 straight hours of chanting can tire a fella out.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:58 | 3347897 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

Heard a crowd chanting this outside of Cyprus' parliament...............

"Tails we'll win, heads you'll lose."

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 14:20 | 3348504 HughJeffin Byrd
HughJeffin Byrd's picture

sounds like a giant ponzi scheme moron, do you disagree with that too?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:48 | 3347370 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

You fucking rock MDB

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:01 | 3347445 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

His best of the day, so far.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:26 | 3347627 JOYFUL
JOYFUL's picture

so far indeed!

He not only rocks, he's on a roll!  So much drollery, so little time!

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:50 | 3347385 OutLookingIn
OutLookingIn's picture

MDS - and maybe little bolts of sunshine will shoot out your ass!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:52 | 3347395 Hughing
Hughing's picture

one for you

one for me

two for you

one two for me

Bitchez

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:53 | 3347397 cifo
cifo's picture

How is the Herbalife business going?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:59 | 3347439 teahouse
teahouse's picture

Ironic

or

What if also the "most" reputable banks COLLAPSE....????

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:59 | 3347440 teahouse
teahouse's picture

Ironic

or

What if also the "most" reputable banks COLLAPSE....????

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:36 | 3347734 fiftybagger
Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:43 | 3347798 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

Of course, if this equity had equivalent future value to the cash being taken, why does not the EU just take that equity as collateral for the money they are promising to send, rather than the cash of citizens, over whom they have no tax authority.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:55 | 3347360 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Horsemeat in the burgers... Horseshit from the EU... HorseHeads in the beds...

~~~

Getting things done ahead of schedule... The YEAR OF THE HORSE comes 'after' the YEAR OF THE SNAKE

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:57 | 3347428 CrimsonAvenger
CrimsonAvenger's picture

so, long Trigger?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:47 | 3347365 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Goldmanus Sachus!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:05 | 3347473 sangell
sangell's picture

Telegraph reported he was on his way to Moscow to 'renegotiate' Russia's loan while Merkel has told Arastaniades to only 'negotiate' with the Troika. These Cypriot pols are caught in a battle between Moscow and Berlin and I don't envy them.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:48 | 3347371 DJ Happy Ending
DJ Happy Ending's picture

Negotiations must be getting interesting.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347343 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

squid

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347345 Cult_of_Reason
Cult_of_Reason's picture

EU bureaucrats want to destroy Cyprus offshore banking and low tax system (in order to force people like Gérard Depardieu to pay 75% taxes).

The only feasible option for Cyprus to survive is to exit the EU.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:04 | 3347465 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

You're suggesting Depardieu is one of the Russians that banks in Cyprus?

Wow, that was fast. He must be a quick study.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:52 | 3347381 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:50 | 3347384 Croesus
Croesus's picture

Happiness returns to the world when bankers jump (or are pushed) off the fucking rooftops.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:51 | 3347389 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

Squidopolous!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:08 | 3347427 Cursive
Cursive's picture

@fourchan

Breaking:

 

MoD also offering British service personnel in Cyprus the option to have their salaries paid into UK accounts from next month.

MoD confirm a plane has taken off for Cyprus with 1 million euros for British forces to use in an emergency whilst banks are closed.

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:10 | 3347516 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Why not helicopters?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:11 | 3347999 Element
Element's picture

They needed something with more .. umm ... payload ... so they put it in a C-17A Globe Master (pronounced "Global Master").

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347307 Coke and Hookers
Coke and Hookers's picture

It's funny to see the division of labor between JP Morgan and Goldman. JPM runs the US while Goldman runs Europe.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:41 | 3347321 fourchan
fourchan's picture

and their owners run the fed and the imf.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347376 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Chosen ones doing "God's Work"...

~~~

That's why I never understood religion... Effectively ~ GOD HATES YOU!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:12 | 3348026 Element
Element's picture

"But it's the wrong God!" - Starship Troopers III

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:34 | 3348218 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

WANNA KNOW MORE?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:22 | 3348107 newworldorder
newworldorder's picture

Did you forget BIS, ECU, ELA, etc.?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347375 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

Adam Smith would be proud.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:22 | 3347605 onewayticket2
onewayticket2's picture

Vince Foster is going to have some company pretty soon....sadly.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:04 | 3347471 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Risk game in 4D

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:19 | 3347555 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

funny, and dimon is jewish greek?

good cop... bad cop?

... and, as tyler has written numerous times about the frb shoring-up the foreign banks in the ussa!?

now, what's-up with that red-herring?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:41 | 3347318 Banksters
Banksters's picture

Exactly.   The fuckin snakes at the eu office in brussels will pop some technocrat in and call it a necessary action.  

 

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:42 | 3347326 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Where is that loyal Cypriot Timmy Geithner?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:48 | 3347373 max2205
max2205's picture

You mean hypocrite

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:43 | 3347332 whatsinaname
whatsinaname's picture

I hope he has some retirement money saved in Bank of America stock. Meredith Whitney thinks it will go to 15 and maybe 20 next year. She sounds very bullish.

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