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Cyprus Finance Minister Resigns, President Refuses To Accept Resignation

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Update: President Anastasiades rejects FinMin Sarris' resignation. Unclear what happens next.

Things just took a turn for the much worse following this news from Market News:

  • CYPRUS FINANCE MINISTER SUBMITS RESIGNATION - SOURCES
  • MARKET NEWS CITES SOURCES ON CYPRUS FINANCE MINISTER

Unclear if German FinMin Schauble will promptly step in to fill this latest sovereign vacancy.

Desperation time for the NY Fed to preserve the market green and give the impression that all is under control, when the rats are now actively leaving the Titanic.

 

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Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:37 | 3347288 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Goldman Sachs crony to be appointed in 3...2...1.....

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347306 redpill
redpill's picture

Yep now they'll just stick in whomever they want.  DOW/S&P to end green for sure.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347312 fourchan
fourchan's picture

whats calamari in greek?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347340 redpill
redpill's picture

????????

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347358 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

Cyprions don't even understand what's going on. They're not "losing" their deposits. The money is temporarily underwriting the equity of some if the world's most reputable banks. When the equity appreciates, depositors will be paid back in full.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347369 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Ok, that makes TOTAL sense.  Unlawfully seize my money now, cuz you'll pay me later.  lol.

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:10 | 3347519 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

It's the same concept as social security moron. Do you disagree with that too? Even though its running a surplus if IOUs?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:22 | 3347598 Tsukato
Tsukato's picture

Rock him like a hurricane MDB! Besides, I don't see what everyone's so excited about. These are the days we've all been waiting so long for. BURN BABY BURN!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:31 | 3348179 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

Rumor has it, that Jon Corzine is on a plane right now headed to Cyprus.  Looks like a replacement with the proper experience for the Finance Minister position has been found.  

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:25 | 3347623 Tsukato
Tsukato's picture

In fact, yesterday I built a small shrine in my living room, where I'm actively making offerings and sacrifices to the god of contagion. 20 straight hours of chanting can tire a fella out.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:58 | 3347897 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

Heard a crowd chanting this outside of Cyprus' parliament...............

"Tails we'll win, heads you'll lose."

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 14:20 | 3348504 HughJeffin Byrd
HughJeffin Byrd's picture

sounds like a giant ponzi scheme moron, do you disagree with that too?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:48 | 3347370 thedrickster
thedrickster's picture

You fucking rock MDB

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:01 | 3347445 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

His best of the day, so far.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:26 | 3347627 JOYFUL
JOYFUL's picture

so far indeed!

He not only rocks, he's on a roll!  So much drollery, so little time!

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:50 | 3347385 OutLookingIn
OutLookingIn's picture

MDS - and maybe little bolts of sunshine will shoot out your ass!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:52 | 3347395 Hughing
Hughing's picture

one for you

one for me

two for you

one two for me

Bitchez

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:53 | 3347397 cifo
cifo's picture

How is the Herbalife business going?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:59 | 3347439 teahouse
teahouse's picture

Ironic

or

What if also the "most" reputable banks COLLAPSE....????

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:59 | 3347440 teahouse
teahouse's picture

Ironic

or

What if also the "most" reputable banks COLLAPSE....????

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:36 | 3347734 fiftybagger
Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:43 | 3347798 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

Of course, if this equity had equivalent future value to the cash being taken, why does not the EU just take that equity as collateral for the money they are promising to send, rather than the cash of citizens, over whom they have no tax authority.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:55 | 3347360 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Horsemeat in the burgers... Horseshit from the EU... HorseHeads in the beds...

~~~

Getting things done ahead of schedule... The YEAR OF THE HORSE comes 'after' the YEAR OF THE SNAKE

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:57 | 3347428 CrimsonAvenger
CrimsonAvenger's picture

so, long Trigger?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:47 | 3347365 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Goldmanus Sachus!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:05 | 3347473 sangell
sangell's picture

Telegraph reported he was on his way to Moscow to 'renegotiate' Russia's loan while Merkel has told Arastaniades to only 'negotiate' with the Troika. These Cypriot pols are caught in a battle between Moscow and Berlin and I don't envy them.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:48 | 3347371 DJ Happy Ending
DJ Happy Ending's picture

Negotiations must be getting interesting.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347343 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

squid

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347345 Cult_of_Reason
Cult_of_Reason's picture

EU bureaucrats want to destroy Cyprus offshore banking and low tax system (in order to force people like Gérard Depardieu to pay 75% taxes).

The only feasible option for Cyprus to survive is to exit the EU.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:04 | 3347465 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

You're suggesting Depardieu is one of the Russians that banks in Cyprus?

Wow, that was fast. He must be a quick study.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:52 | 3347381 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:50 | 3347384 Croesus
Croesus's picture

Happiness returns to the world when bankers jump (or are pushed) off the fucking rooftops.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:51 | 3347389 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

Squidopolous!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:08 | 3347427 Cursive
Cursive's picture

@fourchan

Breaking:

 

MoD also offering British service personnel in Cyprus the option to have their salaries paid into UK accounts from next month.

MoD confirm a plane has taken off for Cyprus with 1 million euros for British forces to use in an emergency whilst banks are closed.

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:10 | 3347516 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Why not helicopters?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:11 | 3347999 Element
Element's picture

They needed something with more .. umm ... payload ... so they put it in a C-17A Globe Master (pronounced "Global Master").

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347307 Coke and Hookers
Coke and Hookers's picture

It's funny to see the division of labor between JP Morgan and Goldman. JPM runs the US while Goldman runs Europe.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:41 | 3347321 fourchan
fourchan's picture

and their owners run the fed and the imf.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347376 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Chosen ones doing "God's Work"...

~~~

That's why I never understood religion... Effectively ~ GOD HATES YOU!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:12 | 3348026 Element
Element's picture

"But it's the wrong God!" - Starship Troopers III

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:34 | 3348218 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

WANNA KNOW MORE?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:22 | 3348107 newworldorder
newworldorder's picture

Did you forget BIS, ECU, ELA, etc.?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347375 JenkinsLane
JenkinsLane's picture

Adam Smith would be proud.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:22 | 3347605 onewayticket2
onewayticket2's picture

Vince Foster is going to have some company pretty soon....sadly.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:04 | 3347471 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Risk game in 4D

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:19 | 3347555 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

funny, and dimon is jewish greek?

good cop... bad cop?

... and, as tyler has written numerous times about the frb shoring-up the foreign banks in the ussa!?

now, what's-up with that red-herring?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:41 | 3347318 Banksters
Banksters's picture

Exactly.   The fuckin snakes at the eu office in brussels will pop some technocrat in and call it a necessary action.  

 

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:42 | 3347326 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Where is that loyal Cypriot Timmy Geithner?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:48 | 3347373 max2205
max2205's picture

You mean hypocrite

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:43 | 3347332 whatsinaname
whatsinaname's picture

I hope he has some retirement money saved in Bank of America stock. Meredith Whitney thinks it will go to 15 and maybe 20 next year. She sounds very bullish.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347338 Withdrawn Sanction
Withdrawn Sanction's picture

Gold   man-Sachs to the rescue!   (Surely, they must be running low on personnel by now?)

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:47 | 3347367 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

This is turning into one of the biggest clusterfucks I've ever seen. I keep going back and forth between whether it's intentional or a simple act of idiocy. It's confusing the hell out of me.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:53 | 3347396 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

The apparent idiocy is designed to mask the intentional.

Plausible deniability bitches.

<We're just simple bankers doing God's work.>

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:59 | 3347418 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

That's pretty much where I'm leaning. But sometimes these people really seem like complete imbeciles. This is one hell of a show.

EDIT: And now this guy's resignation has been "rejected" by the president. Maybe it'll be "You can't resign! You're fired!" LMAO. This is all so perversely entertaining even though it could bring down the entire Western world.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:30 | 3348183 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

When Mrs. Cog starts laughing at the latest "news" I tell her she's having way too much fun considering........ :)

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:51 | 3347391 conspicio
conspicio's picture

A little tidbit from a Goldman Sachs buy rating on Noble Energy (NBL - trading in the 95 range then), circa 2011:

"We see Europe becoming more aggressive in seeking alternatives to depending on gas from Russia, and as such we believe an EU-based LNG solution would be of high strategic interest."

SO I take a look at Total (French) and ENI (Italian) and see they took a 1-2% drop on the haircut so far.

Could Goldman have more on the energy angle if their patsy gets in? sure would make their dreams come true, now wouldn't it?  Long TOT, E, and NBL.

Wed, 03/20/2013 - 00:14 | 3351077 rotagen
rotagen's picture

That's why I say buy a shotgun, much easier to hit things moving quickly out the door.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:37 | 3347290 Cursive
Cursive's picture

Let's put BTC to the test!  I nominate Satoshi Nakamoto for Cyprus Finance Minister!

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:43 | 3347336 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

I did 2 days ago.  Sorry all you BTC haters, but I'm actually trying it.  Not staking my life on it, but I'm trying it.

Great currency if you are trying to smuggle money out of your home country is my first impression of it.  It'll work great until countries start to outlaw it.  All it would take is to shut down MtGox.com (wherever they are located and under whose laws) and it's pretty much over.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:48 | 3347374 Cursive
Cursive's picture

@NoDebt

I mined BTC 2 years ago.  I haven't found anything I want to buy with BTC.  However, if the Cyrpiot "business model" was money laundering from Russia, what better currency could they adopt than BTC?  Heh, I don't have a dog in this fight, but you could easily see how Cypress could raise funds with the silicon valley crowd and maybe even get a flunky like Soros on board.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:03 | 3347457 terryfuckwit
terryfuckwit's picture

I have been into bit coin for over 2 years and have never gone near mtgox except to view prices sometimes I started buying coins on britcoin a uk set up run Amir khan who got closed down from using bank transfer by uk wankbanks now loads other places but mainly use bit bargain or local coins the peer to peer nature means they need to stop people full stop from using bank transfers..... These sites list hundreds of people for instant trades in whatever way you want. I am massively more into me metals than btc but have great respect for the open source movement. It's the glass box tech that scares the shit out of bankers. Any software geek in the world can see if that code has been fucked with....and just like cash it will be associated with unsavory activity..but..will it go away...not bloody likely...

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:38 | 3347291 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

There are plenty of lifeboats.  No need to panic.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347342 Chump
Chump's picture

This is all picking up steam quicker than I anticipated.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347380 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

"Boy, that escalated quickly. I mean, that really got out of hand fast."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FONN-0uoTHI

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:01 | 3347444 Crabshacker
Crabshacker's picture

Looks like everyone is willing to play the Cyprus rape your depositors game now. New Zealand is the latest gamer.

Better get your money of the of The Bank of We Cheatem and How.

http://www.scoop.co.nz/stories/PA130...ew-zealand.htm

National planning Cyprus-style solution for New Zealand

Tuesday, 19 March 2013, 11:32 am Press Release: Green Party 19 March 2013 National planning Cyprus-style solution for New Zealand

The National Government are pushing a Cyprus-style solution to bank failure in New Zealand which will see small depositors lose some of their savings to fund big bank bailouts, the Green Party said today.

Open Bank Resolution (OBR) is Finance Minister Bill English’s favoured option dealing with a major bank failure. If a bank fails under OBR, all depositors will have their savings reduced overnight to fund the bank’s bail out.

“Bill English is proposing a Cyprus-style solution for managing bank failure here in New Zealand – a solution that will see small depositors lose some of their savings to fund big bank bailouts,” said Green Party Co-leader Dr Russel Norman.

“The Reserve Bank is in the final stages of implementing a system of managing bank failure called Open Bank Resolution. The scheme will put all bank depositors on the hook for bailing out their bank.

“Depositors will overnight have their savings shaved by the amount needed to keep the bank afloat.

“While the details are still to be finalised, nearly all depositors will see their savings reduced by the same proportions.

“Bill English is wrong to assume everyday people are able to judge the soundness of their bank. Not even sophisticated investors like Merrill Lynch saw the global financial crisis coming. “If he insists on pushing through this unfair scheme, small depositors can be protected ahead of time with a notified savings threshold below which their savings will be safe from any interference.”

Dr Norman questioned the Government’s insistence on pursuing Open Bank Resolution when virtually no other OECD country uses it. “Open Bank Resolution is unprecedented in the world. Most OECD countries run deposit insurance schemes which protect people’s deposits up to a maximum ranging from $100,000 – $250,000,” Dr Norman said.

“OBR is not in line with Australia, which protects bank deposits up to $250,000.

“A deposit insurance scheme is a much simpler, well-tested alternative to Open Bank Resolution. It rewards safe banks with lower premiums and limits the cost to taxpayers of a bank failure.

“Deposit insurance will, however, require the Reserve Bank to oversee and regulate our banks more closely – a measure which is ultimately the best protection against bank failure.” __________________

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:23 | 3348118 Nick Jihad
Nick Jihad's picture

This is an excellent idea. Banks will need to purchase "gap" insurance in the private market, and private insurers will make them pay a high price for shenanigans.

This, on the other hand, is laughable: "“A deposit insurance scheme is a much simpler, well-tested alternative to Open Bank Resolution. It rewards safe banks with lower premiums and limits the cost to taxpayers of a bank failure."

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:21 | 3348101 astoriajoe
astoriajoe's picture

here's a song called, "This lifeboat is for gold, not people"

nothing to do with gold or lifeboats, but cool title, and not a bad song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qMhTik5QpSE

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:38 | 3347292 Coke and Hookers
Coke and Hookers's picture

"Resigns"= Fired by the Troika

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347311 Cdad
Cdad's picture

Ummm...you could also define "resigns" as "getting out of dodge before all those flights from Russia today reach Cyprus."

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:47 | 3347362 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

boris is on one of them.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:39 | 3347300 Grimbert
Grimbert's picture

Apparently Governing party MP tells BBC all 56 Cypriot MPs have decided to abstain from today's vote

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:42 | 3347324 bank guy in Brussels
bank guy in Brussels's picture

The smart play for any Cypriot politician right now, is to ask for guidance as to course of action from the office of Vladimir Putin

Looks like the Cyprus MPs are doing exactly that

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:11 | 3347510 Mediocritas
Mediocritas's picture

Russian warships have already sailed in to pick up some cargo. There might be a few other forays ashore in the wee small hours if you get my drift.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:39 | 3347304 economessed
economessed's picture

A great opportunity to spend more time with the family!  Alternatively, a great opportunity to avoid being blown-up in your own car by revenge-seeking Russians.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:39 | 3347305 conspicio
Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347355 Son of Loki
Son of Loki's picture

That's some scary stuff, conspicio. Thnx for posting....seems like it can happen anywhere, any time....

 

"Pooooffff! It's gone!"

 

It's no wonder people in China and India hold most of their wealth in PMs...at la casa or vault.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:56 | 3347419 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

That link now proves that this is a global initiative probably forced by Bernocchio and the Fed.  QE is not working, and is inflationary, so why not devalue currency directly by stealing?  Seems logical, if you're corrupt.

This is spreading and now convinces me it is the new plan by the central banks.

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:17 | 3348072 Element
Element's picture

Krug says it's bad for aggregate demand ... duh.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:56 | 3347421 conspicio
conspicio's picture

And although it isn't being covered in the Cyprus context for some reason and despite being news for over 2 weeks now, let's not forget their neighbor AUS taking from the dead letter office...

http://www.news.com.au/money/banking/cash-grab-inactive-bank-accounts-to...

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:20 | 3348090 Element
Element's picture

Holy crap... I didn't even hear about that one.  I guess it will be inactive Superannuation accounts soon too.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347356 bigrooster
bigrooster's picture

Thanks for the link!  I am going to take out $500 from the ATM today.  Hopefully I get at least $450 to actually come out of the ATM.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:40 | 3347308 jldpc
jldpc's picture

Probably heard from the Russians - get out while the getting is good.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:43 | 3347331 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

Russians have very long memories.Its only a temporary reprieve.

Even suggesting it was suicide.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347337 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

The horsehead deliveries have started to arrive.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:41 | 3347314 monopoly
monopoly's picture

And nowhere is there any mention of what is going on. Just "dancing with the Stars". Amazing. 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:44 | 3347339 Grimbert
Grimbert's picture

I'm watching RT. 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:47 | 3347316 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

What's with all this pessimism?

Let's take a cue from Mish:

...I suggest we focus on the bright side, and there is plenty to be found.

  1. The nannycrats have been permanently exposed as liars
  2. Trust is gone
  3. Everyone can now clearly see that deposit guarantees were a lie
  4. Realization has set in that in spite of nannycrat denial, this will happen again
  5. The move in Cyprus will strengthen the Five Star Movement in Italy
  6. The move in Cyprus will embolden the separatists in Spain
  7. The move in Cyprus will strengthen UKIP in Great Britain
  8. The move in Cyprus is even likely to strengthen Alternative für Deutschland (AfD)
  9. Eurobonds and joint budgets are exposed as dead
  10. In Germany, Merkel is likely to have won a Pyrrhic victory (if indeed she won anything at all)
  11. Sensible people now realize all this talk of European solidarity is a gigantic lie
  12. Even ardent supporters of the eurozone are now starting to question its existence
Read more at http://globaleconomicanalysis.blogspot.com/#lIPvL6fiwQ07sFAK.99
Nice quote from one Euro supporter:
"Readers of this column know that I am always in favor of the euro, including the instruments that are necessary to lead him to success. But there comes a point where it is no longer morally to maintain a currency maintained if the government and the parliament will and lacks insight to manage them properly.

 The day is approaching, where you can defend the euro only with tanks. And then the Euro is not worth defending."

[same link]

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:41 | 3347320 cherry picker
cherry picker's picture

God's work.  God must have a big foot in order to squish the little people and those in power are helping God by directing the divine where to place it.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:42 | 3347325 bigrooster
bigrooster's picture

Let your country go bankrupt and survive or accept the bailout and die.  Seems like an easy choice for the politicians.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347379 blueRidgeBoy
blueRidgeBoy's picture

Iceland knows there's a third way....then again, Iceland didn't default on the Russian mob

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:55 | 3347405 Albertarocks
Albertarocks's picture

Yup, I think that's the only answer.  The Cypriots should maybe bite the bullet, brace for a bit of pain, grow a pair like the Vikings of Iceland did and then tell the ECB to go fuck themselves.  Iceland is already recovering remarkably well now that they've rid their island nation of that greedy money-sucking banking cancer.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:36 | 3348227 Nick Jihad
Nick Jihad's picture

Like it or not, hard currencies and traditional Mediterranean politics do not mix. This is world where you have to make choices, and the more you pretend you don't have to choose, the fewer choices you'll have.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:42 | 3347327 Truther
Truther's picture

Use the fucking buldozer already..... Then nominate yourself a hero for the people.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:45 | 3347353 digalert
digalert's picture

...and there is your new Scapegoat.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347354 Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture

start running you banker owned bitch ass politicians...

next, you you cocksucker mother fucking bankers.....

COUP BITCHEZ...............

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:29 | 3348174 astoriajoe
astoriajoe's picture

http://www.myspace.com/thefountainsmusic/music/songs/no-surprise-52658080

Cool song that might make bankers squirm a bit.

"You'll hang from the dollars you've made

And all of the money you've saved won't help to protect you,

from the one that selects you.

You're caught in the crosshairs..."

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347357 Grimbert
Grimbert's picture

Another Apparently,  a plane with 1million euros in cash for British troops has left for Cyprus

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347359 e m m
e m m's picture

The BoJ is sleeping again while the house is on fire. They should long have stepped in and bailed out the depositors with Nikkei 13000 calls.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:46 | 3347361 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

They must have some serious dirt on the guy, either that or he doesn't want to wind up sleeping wit the da fishes.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:47 | 3347366 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

'Cyprus Finance Minister makes desperate attempt to dissaociate self from clusterfuck before Russians show up demanding money'.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:18 | 3347575 e-recep
e-recep's picture

this is getting fun.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:47 | 3347368 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

How long until the lack of any cash (or credit card transactions??) in Cyprus starts to put a serious hurt on the day-to-day?  I mean, they're SHUT DOWN right now. 

Does anyone know if credit card transactions are still working in Cyprus?  I don't know if they have to clear through local banks or not.

Also means nobody is paying their bills right now.  No check clearing.  And who would take a check in Cypress right now anyway?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347378 Truther
Truther's picture

Maybe a rain check?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:54 | 3347401 Cursive
Cursive's picture

@NoDebt

I thinking bartering will increase.  Ferfal said gold and silver chains were the currency of choice in the Argentine flea markets.  Expect the ranks of the "oldest profession in the world" to swell.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:15 | 3347559 Cursive
Cursive's picture

@NoDebt

Sky News reporting that Brits are going to air mail 1M euros into Cypress for British forces.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:36 | 3347737 catacl1sm
catacl1sm's picture

I'm betting that cash is king right now. Cash probably has strengthened in real terms (if not on FX markets).

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:14 | 3347372 Mediocritas
Mediocritas's picture

Schaeuble has already been shot once before. The way he's going, he's looking for an encore. Hope for his sake that they let him tele-commute when he takes over as FinMin in Cyprus.

Suppose it doesn't really matter where he is does it? He started this, angry Russians will finish it.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:49 | 3347382 falak pema
falak pema's picture

I..I...I don't want to sleep with the caviar...

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:50 | 3347388 max2205
max2205's picture

Think the savers are pissed. What about Cyprus equity holders wondering if their market will re open

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:53 | 3347398 jubber
jubber's picture

National Bank of Greece ATL by the look of it

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:53 | 3347403 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Did someone "quit" him or did he quit

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:54 | 3347408 Mr. Hudson
Mr. Hudson's picture

Do you wanna know where the bankers are going to hide? They planned their escape years ago.

http://seattletimes.com/html/businesstechnology/2003783824_luxurysubs11....

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:54 | 3347410 Ourrulersknowbest
Ourrulersknowbest's picture

Useless Irish politicians seem beholden to their euro masters.they certainly ain't working on behalf of their people.their kind of people seem to be the dipshits in Brussels.why are these muppets in power?
Cos we put em there.Now aren't we a grand little nation?????
The sheeple have to wake up soon...I can't see evidence of it here in Ireland but I have to hope.I don't even talk to people about this any more because I'm tired of being regarded as a tin foil hat wearing loony.GOLD? SILVER? Are you nuts?
BAAAAAAAAAH!!! "ME WANT IPAD AND BMW!!!"

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:19 | 3347581 terryfuckwit
terryfuckwit's picture

Could not agree more.. It is as keiser says Stockholm syndrome every body so used to taking it up the backside they have started to enjoy it...they will not appreciate the real savagery of the fucking they have received until there is no food on the table....

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:54 | 3347412 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

One wonders if Cypriot politicians and their friends got their money out of the banking system before the banks were closed.  I know the answer if/when this happens in the US.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:55 | 3347415 Smuckers
Smuckers's picture

A Russian, a German and a Cypriot walk into a bank....

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:05 | 3347474 Mr. Hudson
Mr. Hudson's picture

...and the German had the Cypriot force the Russian to hand over his deposits.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:32 | 3348201 MS7
MS7's picture

...and the Russian predicted the Cypriot would soon be wearing a new kind of shoes, cement shoes.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:55 | 3347417 Stonedog
Stonedog's picture

Don't worry the European Union will appoint somebody... then they appoint a new Prime Minister.  Then they will abolish the Cyprian legislature for their intrasigance on this issue.  I mean it is all for their own good.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 11:58 | 3347432 Arkadaba
Arkadaba's picture

A few sources suggesting he was kicked out:

http://www.ekathimerini.com/4dcgi/_w_articles_wsite1_1_19/03/2013_488623

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:01 | 3347448 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Uh oh, now he cant quit since he" ll be fired..or fired at

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:03 | 3347456 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

start the Benny Hill Music !

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:03 | 3347459 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

 

How to get out of Cyprus in a hurry: Ministry of Finance Handbook:

1. Drive car at top speed through border to Turkish side, dodging UN peacekeepers. Tell Turkish guards that you love Turkish Delight (remember not to say Greek Delight) and that you would like to move to Istanbul asap.

2. Drive car very quickly into British Army base. Tell them to phone your friend George Osborne and that you need to be on next cargo flight out of there tonight.

3. Dress up as a Russian Oligarch and get flight to Croatia (this will take balls but you might be able to pull it off since no one will be expecting this).

4. Take flight to Malta. Your skills may be useful in another the gaming industry. Watch out for the Russians though. They are there too.

5. Climb into German Embassy pretending to be a protester. Then plead with Troika to be allowed out on last helicopter from roof of German Embassy, which is probably leaving tonight....

 

 

 

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:07 | 3347493 larry david
larry david's picture

"Resignation yet to be accepted" per cnbc. Yet again zh miles ahead. 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:14 | 3348041 web bot
web bot's picture

That's because they read it on ZH...

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:15 | 3347556 They_Live
They_Live's picture

UK fly in €1million to supply loans to troops.

 

Putin considering flying in trillion roubles to buy the island?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:17 | 3347567 Hellas
Hellas's picture

German media (n-tv live) report, he was on his way to moscow for negotiations?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:21 | 3347595 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

And so the Cyprus fiasco moves into first place in the Entertainment Channel rankings this week, beating out the Topless Italian Protesters by a narrow margin.

 

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:28 | 3347648 Cone of Uncertainty
Cone of Uncertainty's picture

Cue up the GS rolledex, we need a warm body, preferable, with limp dick and no brain.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:42 | 3347787 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Hilary Clinton is looking for a job.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 12:30 | 3347669 Cone of Uncertainty
Cone of Uncertainty's picture

The finance minister is quitting because Vlad from the local Russian mob cell paid him a visit and ass raped him a few times.

I guess he got the message.

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:18 | 3348083 newworldorder
newworldorder's picture

What is the problem? There has to be a secret list of EU approved financial ministers who have worked for Goldman Sachs and can fill this vacancy pronto.

They can even solicit names from Ben and Timmy. They are in the know - are they not?

Tue, 03/19/2013 - 13:30 | 3348188 reTARD
reTARD's picture

Atlas Shrugged moment when you're not allowed to quit your job and stop working. This concept is even used upon their own "interest groups" eventually.

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