"A Brief History Of Money In Cyprus" As Gasoline "Runs" Are About To Be Unleashed

Tyler Durden's picture

With money, or the lack thereof, a popular topic of discussion in Cyprus currently, we go straight to the source, the Central Bank of Cyprus, where in prose that can only be described as the definition of unintentionally prophetic irony, we read the following:

The historical development of money in Cyprus has followed the sometimes stormy and turbulent course of the island’s political history. The various conquerors that ruled Cyprus throughout its history introduced their own monetary unit to the island. Hence, among other monetary units, the stater, the obol, Roman and Byzantine coins, the gross, the dinar, the cartzi, the para, the piastre and the pound have been used as the island’s currency.

And now the Euro, although perhaps for not much longer.

One thing is certain: the Cypriot "conquerors" are not going down without a fight. First: the gasoline is about to be taken away from the people who dared to make Angela Merxes angry. Let's see how everyone likes walking for a change. From CyprusMail:

SOME petrol stations may have to close down as they do not have enough cash to pay for fuel shipments, the head of the stations’ owners said yesterday.


“We may have to temporarily close some petrol stations because they have run out of cash. This creates great concerns to those in this profession,” said the head of the petrol station owners' association, Stefanos Stefanou.


“Petrol stations pay for their fuel shipment only with cash and cash is running out,” Stefanou added.


“There are some petrol stations that are still accepting credit cards today, but tomorrow no petrol station will do so,” he said, asking consumers to take cash with them to carry out transactions.


Small shopkeepers’ union, POVEK, issued an announcement yesterday saying that because fuel companies only supplied petrol stations on cash payments, customers also needed to pay with cash at their end.


“Unfortunately there is no other solution for petrol station owners,” POVEK said.

And just to assure there is not only a bank run (when/if the banks reopen) but a gas station run too, we get the following carefully coded line:

There is no reason for people to rush to petrol stations to fill their tanks,” POVEK said asking consumers to “show understanding so we can all get through this hard time together”.

Naturally, there is nothing that will make a near-hysterical, cashless population scramble to the nearest gas station than being told "there is no reason to rush to fill their tanks."

Gasoline, of course, is just the beginning. Because if that fails to be the required incentive, the malevolent Cypriot "conquerors" will "turn off" the heat, electricity, food, and finally water, until the Cypriot slaves come begging the Troika to take their deposits just to put everything back as it was, no matter if it only lasts for a few more weeks or months before everything comes tumbling down.

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machineh's picture

"there is no reason to rush to fill their tanks."

Just as there was no rush to withdraw deposits ....

ihedgemyhedges's picture

I am getting BOMBARDED by UkraineDate.com ads on ZH.  Whether mobile or laptop, they are EVERYWHERE. Started just after Cyprus SHTF.  Not that I'm complaining.  I have been married nearly 19 years you know.....

Stackers's picture

Hope Cyprus isnt like a lot of America and living off their credit cards right now ....... oops

Bicycle Repairman's picture

LOL.  Closing down gas stations.  That'll teach those Russian Oligarchs a thing or two.

BC6's picture

Man O man.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that food and water and essential items are next.

Old Poor Richard's picture

Nope, TPTB don't want Cyprus to go into a state of insurrection.  They want to crush and damage the economy until the politicians capitulate on asset seizure to make the banksters whole.  The hoi polloi will mostly continue to be fed.   What I don't get is why or how the charge card payments back to merchants have been shut down.  Does Angela the Horrible actually own the Cypriot credit card banks or the credit card processors?


Oh, and how do I sign up for those UkraineDate ads?  All I get are ads from Batman supervillian Harry Dent predicting the Dow will drop to 3300.


Buck Johnson's picture

Cyprus people where exactly like America using credit to buy and build things, now with things shut off it's going to get nasty.

Grimbert's picture

The ads you get reflect your search history. I love when people make such revelations and I don't let on the ads I get. 

Scro's picture

No always true. It can also reflect the location of your IP address.

pods's picture

I read on the internet that Google can now read your mind and that is how the ads are placed.

Dwarf tossing, Tijuana Donkey shows, and anarchists anonymous, good times.


ihedgemyhedges's picture

As I said, I've been married nearly 19 years.......

e-recep's picture

yeah, i hear you buddy, women don't age well.

Clycntct's picture

What broser? May be time for a change and adblock.

Rattling Bones's picture

Expains all those annoying pop-ups (pun intended) from Magnum condoms.

Freewheelin Franklin's picture

...and Ad Blocker Plus and Do Not Track Me. Both available for Chrome and Firefox.


Also, check out SRWare Iron browser. Same as Chrome but no Google trackers. 



nicoacademia's picture

statistics show that those married 19 years are more likely to...


well how did "they" know?

zipit's picture

It's the behavioral tracking cookies and associated algorithms. Google (or whoever is serving the ads) knows where you have been and/or they know what you want  even before you do.  Go ahead, click the link, signup, and see what happens.

mbarido's picture

To ihedgemyhedges

I am an American currently in China.  I am being bombarded with ChineseLoveLinks.com.  I miss SnorgTees.com ads, but the ChineseLoveLink ad has its beautiful merits.

Theosebes Goodfellow's picture

If those of you in the USA don't think what is happening in Cyprus is coming your way, guess again. What is happening in Cyprus is a marvelous, (if the word can be used in this way), tutorial for what will happen here and elsewhere. Banking asset confiscation is in the cards and no one will be exempt. The very idea that somehow the bank you use will shelter your money from government confiscation is ludicrous. The reality is that the bank you use will use the government to make sure they get paid for debts you didn't directly incur. What do you think the TARP bailout was all about? Prepare accordingly.

nicoacademia's picture

There's no Merxes in America when you have Bernankez

rodocostarica's picture

The various conquerors that ruled Cyprus throughout its history introduced their own monetary unit to the island. Hence, among other monetary units, the stater, the obol, Roman and Byzantine coins, the gross, the dinar, the cartzi, the para, the piastre and the pound have been used as the island’s currency.

I would hazard to guess that all of these monetary units in the past were actual silver/gold coinage or backed by them. Maybe not the pound.

I say Cypriots... return to the GOLD BACKED GROSS!!! You will be famous!!

ATM's picture

It wil be differnt in the US because our bureaucrats own a printing press. 

In Cyprus no one will have any money to buy things. In the USA we will have all the money in the world but shopkeepers, gasoline stations and all the rest won't sell us anything for our paper.

robertocarlos's picture

They are forced to sell in order to pay the taxes. Or they could be forced to sell at gunpoint. Forced to sell at gunpoint doesn't sound like a normal sale.

Professorlocknload's picture

If it comes down to what's going on in Cyprus, here, I have a feeling Sturm Ruger is going to make it a bit more dramatic. If gas sales are shut off over there, it will be targeted at Moltov Cocktail assembly, and maybe retaliation as a secondary consideration.

Those poor folks have no voice with nothing to back them up.


e-recep's picture

"there is no reason to rush to fill their tanks."

so the real message is "fill up your tanks NOW".

akak's picture

No, the REAL message is "You should have filled up your tanks, and extra jerry cans, last week."

He_Who Carried The Sun's picture

Why Gasoline? Where are they going to be driving?

Its an island you know...

Sailing, I'd get that, but driving...?

Funny "ideas" as usual, ZeroHedge ....

earleflorida's picture

what good is a bentley if you can't take out on a saturday nite?

Osmium's picture

Cyprus is only 500 square miles smaller that Hawaii.  There are A LOT of cars on the big Island.

akak's picture

As anyone who has ever tried to drive in and around Kailua, or even down to Captain Cook, during the afternoon rush hour would have to agree.

He_Who Carried The Sun's picture

WtF cares about f*n islands...?

Your car won't get you off it...  :-0 lol

Cthonic's picture

It's 3500 square miles of island.  Delivery lorries, freight ships, and ferries will need it as well.

Cap Matifou's picture

No ferries (or passenger ship) connection to the troubled southern side.

ATM's picture

I'm going to buy futures contracts on Cypriot donkeys.

DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Been nice knowing ya, Cyprus...  But, as in MANY other clusterfucks, there is plenty of blame to go around (Cyprus, Russia / Russian Oligarchs, EU, general corruption, etc.).

knukles's picture

Don't forget that all might not be lost.
The big deposits are owned by the oligarchs torn from the hands of the Russian peasantry
Vlad PU-tin is a bud of many of such..,. well, best put you'd better be a bud of PU's
So there's something of an incentive to not let the EU and Global Banksters take that hard stolen money

Russia has always wanted a warm water port... in the Med!
Maybe that's what's taking so long...
Give the Ruskies a Med Base and the Ruskies use Russain Federation (people's, LOL, as in ha ha, people's money my ass) money to bail out the oligarchs.

Ponzi Complete!

Dr. No's picture

What, gas stations wont accept digital money (credit cards) and only cash?!?  That is downright terroristic of them!

ronaldawg's picture

The UN will define it as TORTURE soon.

IMA5U's picture

who crares


market is going to rip     another faux crisis if u r not a russian mobster

hampsterwheel's picture

This too is Bullish - but again, the Feb dines on baked black swans.... in the end this won't be news by Tuesday, it will all be worked out. Iceland won't allowed to be repeated, banks won't be allowed to fail - its remain calm and print on -

I am growing weary of waiting for the end - so until I read a ZH head line where there is actual blood running in the streets Cairo style - its simply one big yawn - the Western man will bend over and take it for another three to four years, wake me when it really starts getting real - this isn't it....

MsCreant's picture

This may not be "it" but this won't be done by Tuesday. I would want all my money out even if they worked out a wonderful solution. With capital controls in place, everyone is going to be scampering around trying to survive and get their money out. 

Bank run is a done deal.

nmewn's picture

I look at it like a three legged chair MsC.

And you know whats odd?...for currency systems founded on nothing but debt, credit & faith, they sure are going out of their way lately to chop three of those legs away, leaving only one leg, the debt leg.

Something has dramatically changed when accusation equals guilt...when seizure/confiscation by government for its own necessity is even considered, let alone having to be voted on & rejected.

I'm in complete agreement.

Take it out, I already have here, everything but my 401k...and I'm trying to figure a way to do that without getting fingered for not being a "team player" within the new Father Land complex ;-)

oklaboy's picture

Merkel to the rescue in 3.....2......1.....

Winston Churchill's picture

Just as well they use petrol instead of gas, I'm sure they will have shortage of that.

machineh's picture

So the peasants have no petrol?

Let them burn ethanol!

knukles's picture

Corney solution to a leaden problem if you ask me.