Is This Europe's Biggest Nightmare?

Tyler Durden's picture

Just one Spiderman towel left in stock in Europe... how will they ever attract depositors back now...



(h/t @Azizonomics)

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MsCreant's picture

Oh what a tangled web we weave, When first we practise to deceive!

toys for tits's picture

And they only take pounds to buy it.

francis_sawyer's picture

I think if they start offering 'Rabbi Reb Saunders' towels, they'll have a bonafide hit on their hands...

HoofHearted's picture

Obviously everyone has been reading some Douglas Adams, trying to take "Don't Panic" to heart, and getting all prepped up by having their towel with them.

Stackers's picture

The Troika just needs to head down to Nigeria and hook up with one of these guys that has $50,000,000,000,000 he needs to get out of the country on the down low

aint no fortunate son's picture

Larry Motherfucking FINK is long Spiderman towels

Spirit Of Truth's picture

It's possible Syria just rose to the top of the nightmare list.  There's rumors that Bashar Assad has been assassinated:


Likstane's picture

@ Mscreant- That was a good example of an opening comment! 

Orly's picture

After Putin puts the screws to the EU over the Cyprus thing, NATO takes out his best puppet in the Middle East.

This should be a board game.


Skateboarder's picture

Spiderman towels and Prancing With the Stars is the new bread and circuses.

Son of Loki's picture

1 Spiderman Towel for you Señor


Authentic, Hecho en Shenzen

What you talkin about Willis's picture

I've got some old Sperman underwear from when I was a kid.  Will that help?

Ahmeexnal's picture

Angela Merdekill adult diapers, daily pack (contains 12).

What you talkin about Willis's picture

On there way to japan as we speak.

Quantum Nucleonics's picture

Isn't Merkel the only adult in the room?  Is she wrong to make others pay for their own sh$t?  If your neighbor goes out on a bender and finishes the night by puking on your front lawn, is it too much to ask to have them clean it up?  I guess some people would say you ought to pay your neighbor's bar tab too.

What you talkin about Willis's picture

Yes Typo. No I was not rasied Catholic.

Abraxas's picture

You have to be careful with this vigilent crowd. They'd spot a Freudian slip from 1000 miles away.

stacking12321's picture

that's "vigilant" not "vigilent".

so, tell me about your mother.

El Oregonian's picture

She's dead. What do you want to know?

toady's picture

My boy has two complete sets of Spiderman pajamas. I'm WAY ahead in this game!

El Oregonian's picture

Hey I've got a old unused Spiderman Kite still in the wrapper! I'm effing RICH!!! WHOPPPIIEEE!!!

SnobGobbler's picture

i hear they work good for choking bankers too...damn, someone bought it...

TeamDepends's picture

The LaGarde toaster?

zorba THE GREEK's picture

A toaster would be the perfect gift to attract depositors, because it

symbolizes that their money will soon be toast.

Ahmeexnal's picture

Silver does not toast in a toaster.
And interestingly, a silver coin in a operating microwave oven is a sight to behold.
Got Phyzz?

knukles's picture

A Saudi prince* once gave me a biz card and it had gold around the edges... Popped and sparked like mad... What'd a show
Wonder if he ever suspected the functional utility to which we ascribed him

* btw, Saudi princes are like 67 427 Vettes. More registered than ever made

RockyRacoon's picture

Not numbers matching... cobbled together from odd parts and pieces.  Just like the so-called Princes.

Matt's picture

Aren't there something like 40,000 Saudi princes? Could explain why all the oil revenues have evaporated.

cynicalskeptic's picture

You can cobble together the right casting dates and restamp the VIN on the block to get a very convincing - and hard to prove NOT original.  There's a reason GM doesn't want to come oput with a listing of original production Vettes.  Lots of otherwise convincing 'originals' would end up worht a lot less.....   pretty funny though how you can basically build a car from scratch and it's worih $50,000 or $500,000 depending on if it's 'original'.      There's actually a Shelby GT350 that exists in THREE versions.  It was wrecked within the first year of it's existence andlater rebuilt - as three individual cars - by the persons who obtained the wrecked body shell, the original engine block and the original paper title.   NONE of them are really 'original' yet all claim to be.


El Oregonian's picture

"A toaster would be the perfect gift to attract depositors, because it

symbolizes that their money will soon be BURNT."



Smiley's picture

I think a dildo would be more appropriate as soon they will all be fucked.

JustObserving's picture

The problem no longer is attracting depositors - it is not losing all your depositors.  Just ask Cyprus.

Going Loco's picture

Last time I looked the Cypriot bank depositors were all still there... none had left except the lucky few who had managed to exhaust their meagre savings by ATM withdrawels

JustObserving's picture

Perhaps, you may want to check one day after the banks open.  If they open at all.

bingo was his name's picture

If cyprus account holders could get spiderman towels instead of stock at these they could have something of value.


Do worry your money is safe wtih us and is backed by spiderman towels

inevitablecollapse's picture

better quality than the 'spaderman' paraphenalia available south of the u.s. border

falak pema's picture

thats frugality for you! 

17 slobs who all towel off with ONE towel!

They'll need it as the final round of make or break begins at 8 pm sharp EST.

We have a dream or we have a scream; putin eats ice cream either way. 

gimli's picture

No problem, if they just turn the water off next no one will need towels.

One of We's picture to inflationary pressures the depositor incentive is now a Spiderman washcloth......

IridiumRebel's picture

Macy's still has them. Just costs a 9.9% levy tax from your bank account.

Nobody For President's picture

Good joke - click on this link = Out of Stock