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Have The Russians Already Quietly Withdrawn All Their Cash From Cyprus?

Tyler Durden's picture


Yesterday, we first reported on something very disturbing (at least to Cyprus' citizens): despite the closed banks (which will mostly reopen tomorrow, while the two biggest soon to be liquidated banks Laiki and BoC will be shuttered until Thursday) and the capital controls, the local financial system has been leaking cash. Lots and lots of cash.

Alas, we did not have much granularity or details on who or where these illegal transfers were conducted with. Today, courtesy of a follow up by Reuters, we do.

The result, at least for Europe, is quite scary because let's recall that the primary political purpose of destroying the Cyprus financial system was simply to punish and humiliate Russian billionaire oligarchs who held tens of billions in "unsecured" deposits with the island nation's two biggest banks.

As it turns out, these same oligrachs may have used the one week hiatus period of total chaos in the banking system to transfer the bulk of the cash they had deposited with one of the two main Cypriot banks, in the process making the whole punitive point of collapsing the Cyprus financial system entirely moot.

From Reuters:

While ordinary Cypriots queued at ATM machines to withdraw a few hundred euros as credit card transactions stopped, other depositors used an array of techniques to access their money.


No one knows exactly how much money has left Cyprus' banks, or where it has gone. The two banks at the centre of the crisis - Cyprus Popular Bank, also known as Laiki, and Bank of Cyprus - have units in London which remained open throughout the week and placed no limits on withdrawals. Bank of Cyprus also owns 80 percent of Russia's Uniastrum Bank, which put no restrictions on withdrawals in Russia. Russians were among Cypriot banks' largest depositors.

So while one could not withdraw from Bank of Cyprus or Laiki, one could withdraw without limitations from subsidiary and OpCo banks, and other affiliates?

Just brilliant.

And if there was any doubt that the entire process of destroying one entire nation was simply to punish Cyprus, it can be completely cleared away now:

ECB officials contacted Latvia, another EU country that has received large Russian deposits, to warn authorities against taking in Russian money fleeing Cyprus, two sources familiar with the contacts said.


"It was made clear to our Latvian friends that if they want to join the euro, they should not provide a haven for Russian money exiting Cyprus," a euro zone central banker said.

If one thinks there is any material Russian cash therefore left in Cyprus with this epic loophole in place, we urge them to make a deposit in the insolvent nation. One person who certainly will not be allocating any of his money into Bank of Cyprus is German FinMin Schaeuble:

German Finance Minister Wolfgang Schaeuble said the bank closure had limited capital flight but that the ECB was looking closely at the issue. He declined to provide figures.

Perhaps because if he did, it would become clear that the only entities truly punished by this weekend's actions are not evil Russian billionaires, but small and medium domestic companies, and other moderately wealthy individuals, hardly any of them from the former "Evil Empire."

Companies that had to meet margin calls to avoid defaulting on deals were granted funds. Transfers for trade in humanitarian products, medicines and jet fuel were allowed.

The stealth withdrawals by Russians of course means that the two megabanks are now utterly drained of capital, and that the haircuts on those who still have unsecured deposits with the two banks will be so big it will likely mean a complete wipeout of all deposits. As in 0% recovery on your deposits!

In other words, by now any big Russian funds in Cyprus are long gone, and the only damage accrues to the locals: for one reason because their money over the critical EUR100K threshold has been "vaporized", and for another because the marginal driving force and loan demand creator in Cyprus, the Russians, are gone and are never coming back again.

This is what passes for monetary real-politik in the New Normal - an entire nation becomes collateral when pursuing a wealthy group of people. And the "wealthy group" is victorious in the end despite everything...

If we were Cypriots at this point we would be angry. Very, very angry.


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Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:16 | 3375676 delacroix
delacroix's picture

the cooling systems, are designed for cold weather. they have problems in hot climates

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 06:12 | 3375915 css1971
Mon, 03/25/2013 - 18:59 | 3374562 mendigo
mendigo's picture

So failure to make an interest payment would clearly constitute an act of default.
But grab money from your clients problem!
No why did I not think of that.
So by this standard Jon Corzine is definitely off the hook.
I think most drug dealers would find this somewhat underhanded...and possibly did. There's a new sheriff in town.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:08 | 3374597 mendigo
mendigo's picture

No longer to be described as the "E"-"U" , but rather the EEWH... because that shit stinks.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 18:59 | 3374564 Xrated
Xrated's picture

Russian mafia reminded the bank officials of

Boris Berezovsky's fate
Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:00 | 3374569 ozzz169
ozzz169's picture

Is this real?  if so, the country is completely screwed.  amazing...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:04 | 3374582 Pampalona
Pampalona's picture

New Cyrpiot tourism ads: 'Come take a relaxing break in sunny Cyprus, where EVERY day is a bank Holiday!!!'

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:29 | 3374663 toys for tits
toys for tits's picture

lol +1

"Despite having the largest number of banks in the wild, per capita, we will take you on a special tour so that you may see that rare sight, an open bank." 

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:09 | 3374601 Meremortal
Meremortal's picture

I submit that this will not happen in America. This wouldn't have happened in Cyprus if Cyprus could print money like the US.

The EU structure is the problem here.

America has no need to dun accounts, the FED has been stealing cash by lowering its' value since the FED's inception and has recently accelerated that process. And it doesn't matter where you keep it.

Quiet, clean and easy. Even now, only a minority know what's going on.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:09 | 3374604 lindaamick
lindaamick's picture

1) Russia was quiet and did not offer the money because they knew they would be able to repatriate millions/billions in depositor monies before the bank take downs, ie, Russian banks benefit.

2) Russia also knows that the people of Cyprus and the government will become increasingly desperate due to small busiesses being robbed by the EU and the people becoming increasingly impoverished they might agree to sell off their gas futures to the highest bidder for crumbs out of desperation.  

Also, the geopolitical ramifications of this bank thing has not been revealed yet but there are many "Interested" parties.  Nato wants to include Cyprus, the EU countries plus Britain and Turkey want a gas pipeline to ease their reliance on Russian gas and Russia wants a leg in the Med via a non-Nato Cyprus and the gas rights.

It will be interesting for those of us who stay with the story (the interesting things will happen AFTER the media is gone) and interesting due to us NOT being a poor Cypriot citizen who will be screwed in many many ways.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:15 | 3374617 Likstane
Likstane's picture

You can withdraw, transfer, co-locate, re-hypothecate, unfund, refund, electronic wire, and substitute any and all the fiat in any account you want with any bond, bitcoin, certificate, etf, paper piece of shit money substitute you want.  Eventually there is no place to safe keep your wealth except the shiny hard coin in your left fist with the bullet spewing steel piece in your right(switch them if you're a lefty).  Any one still keeping the bulk of their value storage in non-metallic entities deserves to lose it. 


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:15 | 3374621 Kreditanstalt
Kreditanstalt's picture

Nobody's money should ever be "seized", "taxed","confiscated" or just plain stolen.

Three cheers for the Russians for ingenuity!!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:31 | 3375131 sethstorm
sethstorm's picture

Applauding tax evasion is applauding crime in itself.

Trying to screw over the government only makes your fate that much worse.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:40 | 3375709 akak
akak's picture

I wonder, were you born on your knees, or is it a learned behavior?

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 17:08 | 3378939 sethstorm
sethstorm's picture

I wonder how many beehives you knocked around until you got the idea not to do that.  Mess with the governments enough by tax evasion and things will not look well for you.

But if you insist on being Icarus, go ahead.  Just don't complain that your wings melted off during the fall.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:18 | 3374629 rsnoble
rsnoble's picture

Fkn crazy.  This world just gets more nuts by the day.  If not by the minute.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:21 | 3374633 are we there yet
are we there yet's picture

I remember thinking over a week ago when Cyprus banks were going south that Russia was being strangely quiet and low key, and also thinking that this does not add up.  Russian oligarchs are not pasive compliant personalities. Now we know they did not want to attract attention while they were lowering their lifeboat.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:21 | 3374637 Mordenkainen
Mordenkainen's picture

Boris Berezovsky died by hanging, police say

Hanged himself with piano wire?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:32 | 3374676 toys for tits
toys for tits's picture

Then he cut himself down and threw the wire away.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 00:40 | 3375648 seataka
seataka's picture

sounds a bit like the death of the nation’s first Secretary of Defense, James Forrestal

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 06:16 | 3375917 francis_sawyer
Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:58 | 3374796 Debugas
Debugas's picture

nope, he did it with with a scarf even without hanging - simply tied it to hard

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:05 | 3375055 Tunga
Tunga's picture

... after he shot himself in the head... twice.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:22 | 3374638 One of We
One of We's picture

English:  Entrance from the backyard

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:24 | 3374647 yrbmegr
yrbmegr's picture


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:27 | 3374657 ekm
ekm's picture

Ok, people. Again, Military is first, finance is second.

Finance simply complements military.

If you remember, the 1st hit would have been 10% of deposits, which is insignificant for the oligarchs. So, it was not about money. Strange enough, russians are too quiet.


Check here and check the date of the article March 13, 2013, only few days ago.


USA and NATO always wanted Cyprus, always. It was the previous president, a communist who brought the russians in.

However, the new president wanted NATO in. Remember, Russia a global force and does deals.



Here's the deal that may have been stricken, my conjecture:

- Russia gives cyprus to Nato

- Russian oligarchs save their money

- Nato agrees that Russia keeps Syria base in order to fuel and maintain the fleet.

- Russia has agreed not to care about syrian president Assad any longer.

- During the nato membership process, UK hands over 2 military bases to nato, greek and turkish parts of cyprus re-unite under Nato. Remember, Turkey is nato member, also.

- USA and Europe pour money into Cyprus by investing in expanding brittish/nato military bases.


It seems a good deal to me.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:31 | 3374671 ekm
ekm's picture

In the meantime, Merkel wanted a piece of the cake in order to help her re-election.


The crucial factor to me as far as finance only is the follows:

As part of the above mentioned possible deal,  with the only real goal being to secure a military base on the mediterranean, have the russians accepted to be defaulted on the CDS payouts, which the QEs are done for?


If the answer is yes, then QEs will be slowed down very soon, quite soon.


And of course, I'd like to emphasize again, that Draghi was simply a shadow in all this matter. By extension, since military is first and finance simply assists the military goals, Bernanke is always oh hold ready to receive orders.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:41 | 3374716 yrbmegr
yrbmegr's picture

The reunification part is oversimplified.  Turkey and Greece will never agree to a publicly reunified Cypus.  There may be de facto reunification, but each country will retain its de jure sovereignty.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:43 | 3374727 ekm
ekm's picture

That would mean mutual recognition.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:54 | 3375459 ATG
ATG's picture

Only one major issue:

USA on the verge of losing military superiority despite first strike capacity in 2015:




Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:37 | 3375704 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Yes, Cyprus would make a nice, humongous NATO base for superiority in the Med.

A military takeover ny NATO cannot be far behind.

GAZPROM gets a cut of the energy resources.

Germany re-conquers Cyprus.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:28 | 3374660 pashley1411
pashley1411's picture

And so we see that the reason Putin isn't gettting real fired up over this is that, well, when your enemy is making a mistake....

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:28 | 3374661 Jethro
Jethro's picture

The ECB trotted out Cyprus as their Gimp. Russia just got mideaval on the ECB's ass....

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:31 | 3374666 Pampalona
Pampalona's picture

What if u have an account in each of those two banks ... Each with 99,000 euros?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:07 | 3374831 Legolas
Legolas's picture

Even if you have an account in each of those two banks ... Each with 9 euros, you're SCREWED !

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:31 | 3374668 nothing can go wrogn
nothing can go wrogn's picture

It's one thing to say that the smaller deposits are "insured." It's another thing to actually be one of those depositers and get your money back (if the Cyprus banks ever reopen).

They just threw that in there to not spook the rest of Europe. Those small depositers have a giant IMF dildo up there...right now.

Holy's like a neutron bomb, they blew up Cyprus and all the buildings are still standing.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:35 | 3374687 Benjamin Glutton
Benjamin Glutton's picture

Bank Holidaze are for the little people....

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:43 | 3374729 Dr. Kananga
Dr. Kananga's picture

I knew it!

The new Russians do not wait in lines, Comrade...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:00 | 3375032 newengland
newengland's picture

You will.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:51 | 3374742 ATG
ATG's picture

Great reportage TD/ZH.

The next surprise EU casualty may be France, who just closed below 50 day moving average:

Vive la France...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:06 | 3374816 newengland
newengland's picture

Vichy France deserves the worst. Do remember that its sadistic rapist beloved DSK of its Socialist Party was leading presidential contender whilst head of the nazionist IMF...before his penchant for sexual sadism was exposed, no doubt by one of his own, a rival, a fellow nazionist Sarkozy?

Long live the French people. Long drops and short ropes for its traitorous political class.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:47 | 3374750 newengland
newengland's picture

They can run, but there will be no escape for the oligarchs who double crossed Mother Russia and their last vassal state, as does the EUSSR, its gangster banksters and traitor political class.

Interesting that Abramavich and his world's biggest yacht moored off New York in February this year, hiding in plain sight, seeking refuge among his fellow Nazionists who will as much double cross him as they did Robert Maxwell when he outlives his purpose. Typical Madoff and Corzine behavior among the cut throat tribe, the rootless cosmopolitans who value money and power above any human being, culture or common decency.

Putin is a patriot. Any honest patriot can do honest business with someone like him. Only a patriot knows what it is like to love the land and people of one's birth so very much that every breath, every danger, every fault, every terrible act will be committed in defence of kith and kin.

The West misunderstands the Medvedev's comment: '...the stealing of the stolen continues...'. They do not understand Russian realism: that they were conned by international financiers, old and new.

After the 1917 revolution, Lenin the pet of zionist German banksters mused: “The old Bolshevik was right when he explained what Bolshevism was to the Cossack who’d asked him if it was true the Bolsheviks stole. Yes, said the Bolshevik:  "We steal what has already been stolen.’

 The current problem is led by Germany, and Lenin was a German intelligence asset given the job of causing revolution in Russia to take Russia out of the war - thus freeing up Germany from a two-front war.

Crypto-communist Merkel, like Marx and others funded by the international banking cartel want to kill capitalism. They want monopoly, total control, a jackboot on the face of mankind, as Orwell fortold in his prescient novel '1984".

The modern cinematic version might be 'V' for vendetta, and the masked hero says: 'If you feel as I feel...' while he urges the people to burn down Parliament, and break the chains of their stupor and collaboration with the venal modern political class in London.

It always comes back to London, the conniving City, the duplicitous Nazi royals and their  continental bloodline who slaughtered Czar Nicholas and his family and unleashed the Red Terror, slaughtering Christians and Russians.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:17 | 3375088 andrewp111
andrewp111's picture

Ah yes, the City. I'd love to see the City of London fail. That would be an event worth popping whole bushels of popcorn for.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:45 | 3375167 newengland
newengland's picture

Guy Fawkes was the last honest man to enter Parliament, and even he was dubious, being a papist, a Vatican tool of the old oligarchy.

End the Fed.

End the Vatican.

End world slavery.

Guillotine the conniving lying two faced Nazi loving monarchy.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:11 | 3375295 TNTARG
TNTARG's picture


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:48 | 3374752 Crash Overide
Crash Overide's picture

Nothing will change until the masses starts stringing up bankers, politicians, and any other greedy fucks on light poles. I do no advocate violence but sometimes it has to be done this way to "send a message" from the people...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:46 | 3374980 W74
W74's picture

I advocate exactly what you speak.  I usually prefer strong-limbed oak trees, but in the absence of those light poles will do.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:57 | 3375481 honestann
honestann's picture

Do you consider "self-defense" to be "violence"?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:50 | 3374764 One of We
One of We's picture

Ain't got no place to lay your head 

Somebody came and stole your bread 

Don't worry, be happy 

The ECB say your alms is late 

He may have to liquidate 

Don't worry, be happy 

Look at me I am happy 

Don't worry, be happy 

Ain't got no cash, ain't got no style 

Ain't got no bitcoins to make you smile 

But don't worry be happy 

Cause when you worry 

Your face will frown 

And that will bring EURUSD down 

So don't worry, be happy (now)..... 

Take this little bankster note 

No questions or we get the garrote

Like good little sheep 

Don't worry, be happy

Listen to what I say 

In your account expect some trouble 

Pro'ly cuz of Merkel and Schauble

But don't worry, be happy...... 

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 19:55 | 3374766 epwpixieq-1
epwpixieq-1's picture

The elite banking families (the old oligarchs), wanted to show to the new oligarchs who is the boss, but apparently the new oligarchs know how to use the system better then the old oligarchs.

The old oligarchs (banking families) used play against the system in this way, back in 19the and in the beginning of the 20th centuries, but in the recent decades they just got more greedy and lazy and decided that is a better gain for them just to create the "laws" of the land, favoring their business, and to go with the "law" enforcement ( the government) against everyone else how tries to be smarter then then.

It seems that in this case it did not work out. 1:0 for the new oligarchs, in this battle ground.

What will be the next, who knows, but ones is clear we are entering very interesting and somehow trigger happy times.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:13 | 3374842 newengland
newengland's picture

Meanwhile, patriots of any country reject the oligarchs, old and new.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:10 | 3374836 chump666
chump666's picture

Id say the Russians, what were in deposited Cyprus, got out by the March 14th: noting safe haven spikes in the AUD and USD/CAD cross.

 Cyprus allowed the ECB to bone it's general population, extending bank holidays to Thursday.  While the wealthy got out week or so back.



Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:15 | 3374852 newengland
newengland's picture

The Cypriot president warned his family and associates to get their money out of the country four days before the country's bankster problems were publicised.

See? All the thieves run first, and leave others to wipe up the mess.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:03 | 3375490 chump666
chump666's picture

Yes, this event is the most disgusting thing that has happened in the markets for a very long time. 

The capital controls on Cyprus will have to be forever, curious how bank runs go on Thursday (when they open).  Meantime there are tons of flows going into Asian safe-havens and AUD.  Someone or peoples are leaking cash out of the Cyprus/EZ big time.

What a bunch a f*cking maniacs = EU/IMF/ECB/Bernanke

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:28 | 3375883 hooligan2009
hooligan2009's picture

is this for real? wow..i think his family and himself will need a lot more security..greeks are not forgiving of this kind of treatment..the law has very little influence, morality however...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:17 | 3374856 smacker
smacker's picture


It's difficult not to draw the conclusion that Merkel & Baubles (and other EZ elites involved in this rotten scam) knowingly allowed Russian money to flee before it was scalped.

Meaning that whilst the EU elites wanted to purge Cyprus of Russian money to (perhaps) please Putin, they didn't actually want the oligarchs to share the pain of fixing Cyprus, because of potential political/violent consequences (and of course Merkel has some close connections with Russia). No, fixing Cyprus's banking system was always going to be a burden imposed on the locals.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:02 | 3375040 newengland
newengland's picture

Follow the money. Who profits? Western banks, and their EUSSR political pets.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:33 | 3374937 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

As in 0% recovery on your deposits!

As in it's for your freedom!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:34 | 3374939 Comrade de Chaos
Comrade de Chaos's picture

THE Spice must flow ...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:47 | 3374970 GeoffreyT
GeoffreyT's picture

It's not surprising that money was 'leaking' out of Cyprus, but the big question is whether it was Russian money. That question will be answered by the number of Cypriot politicians whose headless/handless/footless corpses are washed up on beaches over the next year or so.

Still, it seems to me that by buying into all the media short-stroking over the Bratva , ZH is [inadvertently] doing the mainswamp's job of 'catapulting the propaganda' by reinforcing the idea that there should be a Two Minutes' Hate directed at someone other than the Cypriot political class.

My bet would be that the bulk of the money that fled was that held by cronies of the Cypriot parasite classes (the politicians and their camp-followers). Some Russkie moolah might have been tipped off (anyone with more than $100m to their name always gets a free senior bureaucrat for hire, anywhere in the West)... but I would be looking for Greek Cypriot names turning up on the roster of new owners of châteaux in the Loire Valley and apartments in Neuilly, Paris VXIeme and other hotbeds of Parisian organised crime.

As I wrote in my SMS to several chums on Mar17 (10:14 a.m., Aussie time):

"Seen what just happened in Cyprus? A forced haircut on ALL bank deposits (6.5% for deposits < $100k; 9.9% above $100k). Cyprus' politicians just guaranteed no foreign cash inflows for the next century."

That's going to be the horrific thing for the Cypriot in the street: no foreign capital inflows (why would capital flow into somewhere that just showed that it will ass-rape you so that its bankers can get their bonuses?).

And once the foreign capital inflows stop, the tourism stops - and that's pretty much the sole economic activity that employs any Cypriot from the bottom 90% (it's almost 1 in 3 jobs economy-wide, and 10.7% of GDP... and if it stays in the Euro, no exchange rate effect to make it cheaper when things go to shit).

Once it becomes clear that a country's government is prepared to ass-fuck tourists, they tend to stay away. Zimbabwe used to have a decent-sized tourism industry (1.4m visitors in 1999 - then a 70% drop the following year), and it is only just starting to claw its way back to pre-Mugabenomics levels.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:49 | 3374986 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

The back door is unlocked for some. For the others there's K-Y or not

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:46 | 3374982 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Anyone know if Corzine didnt get diplomatic status and or move to Cyprus? This has The Corzine Effect written on it.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:50 | 3374990 chasman
chasman's picture

This stuff is right out of a Tom Clancy novel. We are only missing the sex and a few bodies. That is coming in a day or so. Just like in the wizard of Oz. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. The cover up and plot is fasinating. So where do we go from here? Folks this rabbit hole goes DEEP. The MSM thinks this is about a stikin 5-10 Billion. Heck, Apple Computing could have purchased this little soap opera Nation and then purchased Apple Vacation and turned this into a Disney for vacationers. Folks this is about the jucy stuff called Power, namely NATAO and WARSAW.

The Endgame of this chess game is already in check mate.What we are seeing is show for our enertainment.

Now the MSM crowd is sucking this up to the point I feel sorry for their sub-single cell brains.


Many of the ZH croud hit this one right on the head. Bravo!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:55 | 3375008 Comrade de Chaos
Comrade de Chaos's picture

'We are only missing the sex and a few bodies.'     (only sex is missing, or is it ?)

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:14 | 3375078 newengland
newengland's picture

Here's the bodies and sex, the real Trilateral Commission: guns, girls, gold:

Chill. Enjoy the moves :-)

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:00 | 3375250 TNTARG
TNTARG's picture

You know? I feel sorry for this sick people.

Think of Lagarde. (A woman?).

What a shitty dinner they had this Sunday.

I enjoy good sex, excellent food, freedom and I haven't a dime into a bank account.

Life looks pretty good.

You can turn your backs on them.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 06:23 | 3375920 CJHames
CJHames's picture

Aaaaaa fuckin men, TNTARG.  Amen.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:47 | 3375437 Rusty Trombone
Rusty Trombone's picture

Sex in a Tom Clancy novel ?  Egads, that's just plain fucking creey to think of.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:06 | 3374994 andrewp111
andrewp111's picture

You just can't make this stuff up. It shows the EU to be run by complete clowns. No wonder Russia refused to bail out Cyprus. They already got their money out of the Eurosystem.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 20:57 | 3375012 Tunga
Tunga's picture

Oh Polonium we knew thee well. Oh dark night of glowing half life. Oh shame of sorrow floating in empty boats. Your demise so sure. But my guns? My guns? Gone with thy gold. 
We hardly knew thee.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:06 | 3375060 newengland
newengland's picture

Guns. Gold. Girls. The real Trilateral Commission :-)

Enjoy the moves, my friends everywhere. No surrender to the oligarchs, old and new.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:03 | 3375043 Lmo Mutton
Lmo Mutton's picture

Good thing we have a plan "B".

What do you mean there is no plan "B"?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:12 | 3375073 kraschenbern
kraschenbern's picture

An example of honor among thieves.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:15 | 3375083 Die Weiße Rose
Die Weiße Rose's picture


Thursday the Banks will open for a split-second

and then Shut again immediately...

because it is EASTER FRIDAY and a long EASTER Holiday...

and after that the stupified sheeple hopefully won't remember,

the fact that again, they have been RIPPED OFF !


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:23 | 3375105 newengland
newengland's picture

So what? Better men and  women die while whining voters complain about their missing money, wage endless war, and care little for anyone who dies so long as they get their money.

Chill, dud. You got what you voted for. Pick up a gun and fight your gangsta banksta or ...roll with the blows.




Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:53 | 3375599 RSBriggs
RSBriggs's picture

Why don't you spam that link a few more times?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:19 | 3375094 kushmere
kushmere's picture

Its not just the Cypriots who will turn some of their money into Bitcoin, it's the Russians too. - now with 6th post goodness!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:20 | 3375096 CDNX fan
CDNX fan's picture

The purpose of all of this is to DRIVE MONEY to the country carrying the highest debtload in World History on a real basis - the United States of America.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:22 | 3375684 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Yes, USA, the main Branch Bank of The City.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:32 | 3375134 Die Weiße Rose
Die Weiße Rose's picture

(Monty Python's Flying Cyprus)

Thursday the Banks will open for a split-second

and then Shut again immediately...

because it is EASTER FRIDAY and a long EASTER Holiday...

and after that the stupified sheeple hopefully won't remember,

the fact that again, they have been RIPPED OFF !

(but we are a resillient people, he said with blood spurting from his severed neck

 We are a resillient people, and even without arms and legs,we are going to fight! )

(Monty Python's Flying Cyprus)


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:33 | 3375136 Youri Carma
Youri Carma's picture

Just as I expected or otherwise some corpses down the river...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:37 | 3375148 Dull Care
Dull Care's picture

The Geto Boyz got it wrong. The song should have been 'Damn It Feels Good to be a Bankster'.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:41 | 3375161 shinobi-7
shinobi-7's picture

Forget the Russians; they're gone! What is important is that Cyprus joined the Euro on January 1, 2008, exactly 5 years ago! It took them that little time to create this gigantic mess. The German are certainly to blame for a lot of things, but saying Nein to "that"? Probably not!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 21:52 | 3375196 newengland
newengland's picture

No offense, but that is a naive comment. International financiers run the money, and everyone else pays for it, one way or another.

They are a very small tribe who feel victimised when they lose, and hubris overtakes them when they are in the money. Jerks. Psychos. All descended from the same bloodline, and you know what they say about inbreeding: it creates idiots, dangerous plotting psychos.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:00 | 3375244 Fist full of CDOs
Fist full of CDOs's picture

Fuck me with a big stick. You couldnt make this shit up. 

Burns: How much for your entire collection? 
Comic Book Guy: Um, the speed of light expressed in dollars.
Burns (to Smithers): Just give him Faraday's constant

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:07 | 3375269 newengland
newengland's picture

Fly, my pretties, fly. And burn while you're at it.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:09 | 3375288 samsara
samsara's picture
"The illusion of freedom [in America ] will continue as long as it's profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater." ~Frank Zappa
Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:17 | 3375311 newengland
newengland's picture

Zappa lived in a country where he could express his sincere feelings without being shot on sight or sent to a gulag. His descendants have done little to keep it so, and his words were protected by the actions of braver people.

You want freedom? Earn it. Fight for it. Pick up a gun and fight the gangsta bankstas or roll with the blows and enjoy the compatriotism of ordinary people, rolling with the blows, and enjoying the moves:

Every day is a chance to make the world a better place.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:10 | 3375291 billstets
billstets's picture

What does this mean?


However, the terms of the winding-up order for Laiki Bank DO apply to deposits in Laiki Bank UK. Deposits of less than 100,000 Euros will be transferred to the Bank of Cyprus (or possibly Bank of Cyprus UK - it is unclear at present) as part of the closure procedures for Laiki Bank. Deposits above that amount are frozen and depositors should expect to lose a substantial proportion of the excess above 100,000 Euros, possibly as much as 100%. No compensation will be available for this loss.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:10 | 3375294 samsara
samsara's picture

"Like the DeathStar aborbing whole planets for use as fuel for itself"

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:17 | 3375324 tom
tom's picture

Did the Russians actually have much cash in Cypriot banks in the first place?

I haven't seen any hard data. The only number the journalists keep quoting is from an old Moody's report, and it's not clear Moody's was doing any more than looking at the total foreign deposits and guessing what portion were Russian.

Keep in mind that Cyprus banks own subsidiary banks in Russia. I suspect Moody's number included all their deposits. Those are not directly affected by the wind-downs or by capital controls in Cyprus. So far as I know their correspondent accounts at their parent banks' in Cyprus are being kept whole. There are no restrictions on withdrawals.

This has been coming down the pike since 2010. The Russians aren't stupid.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:20 | 3375334 Quaderratic Probing
Quaderratic Probing's picture

"It was made clear to our Latvian friends that if they want to join the euro, they should not provide a haven for Russian money exiting Cyprus," a euro zone central banker said.

Why would anyone want to join now?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:40 | 3375377 newengland
newengland's picture

For the same reason most countries are in the euro and EUSSR: intimidation, the threat of ruin if they don't.

Remember: all polls show that most Europeans do not voluntarily want to be in the EU. No surprise. The EUSSR has failed to get its corrupt accounts passed by an independent audit. Why? Because it is a Frankenstein creation: by the banks, for the banks and of the banks. Politicians connived with this, good lil Nazionists that they are.

When Ireland voted 'no', it had to vote again, as did others...until its political elite was able to manipulate figures for EU entry, and to hell with democracy.

The euro is a triumph for the international financiers, the rootless cosmopolitans who like endless war as they have always done because war makes money for them.

Freak paedophile child killer sodomite UK Prime Minister Edward Heath the Horrible lured Brits into the EU under the guise of a 'Common Market' with no political integration, but he admitted in private that he lied because the people would never have gone into this EUSSR knowingly, willingly.

Don't like that truth? Then shoot the bastids instead of sending braver people to endless war for your right to choose, and you choose war by the blood of others.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:15 | 3375536 AgentScruffy
AgentScruffy's picture

...and why the hell is it anyone's business where wealthy Russians put their money?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 22:55 | 3375463 Fíréan
Fíréan's picture

Maybe the Cyrpriot economy wil be saved, temporarily)  by installation of  USA/Nato military base(s) along side ther British ones ? ? . . . untilil the gas flows, Now they are well and truely owned by the EU/IMF et all so all funds derived from the later source will become communal EU( Brussles) directed.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:12 | 3375526 Bear
Bear's picture

The Russians are Coming, The Russians are Coming ... Oh, they already came

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:52 | 3375720 Just Ice
Just Ice's picture

...and went

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:14 | 3375529 AgentScruffy
AgentScruffy's picture

Fascinating. Thanks Zero Hedge. Horrible outcome but I'm glad the Russians took care of themselves!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:16 | 3375539 chindit13
chindit13's picture

I'm going to let this one breathe pending confirmation.  One suspects that Cyprus was being brought to a head by withdrawals two weeks ago, precipitating the crisis.  It remains to be seen if this picked up during the local bank holiday period.  If the branches in the UK and elsewhere remained open during the Cyprus bank holiday, and no transfer restrictions were imposed, undoubtedly some deposits were removed.  The question is how much?  Were these deposits kept in euro until Monday (since the euro had a pretty neutral week last week)?  If deposits did indeed leave, what will the new bailout/bail-in number be? 

I think this story will develop over time, and it will take a while for the real numbers to come out.  While it is conceivable the Troika and Eurogroup leadership is as incompetent as they outwardly appear to be, it goes beyond the pale to think they did not have (and still do not have) detailed records of how much was transferred out of foreign branches of Cypriot banks.  Those things do leave a paper trail.  The total could be determined in a matter of minutes by querying branches and collating. 

If the Eurogroup and Troika members are not meeting right now in emergency session, then I would think the outward flows were not so great.  If they are meeting, then flows were substantial.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:22 | 3375555 FreeNewEnergy
FreeNewEnergy's picture

We are all Cypriots now.

Unless you're Russian, of course.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:33 | 3375571 Herkimer Jerkimer
Herkimer Jerkimer's picture




If someone cares to do some digging, I'm sure that the reason for, and that this bank holiday was extended for just that very reason: to allow the rich to get their money out of the banks.



Mon, 03/25/2013 - 23:34 | 3375575 PMakoi
PMakoi's picture

Chess... intersting game.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 00:03 | 3375613 Carl Spackler
Carl Spackler's picture

As a former central banker and investment banker, I don't believe this is entirely accurate news article from Reuters. 

Break down the fundamentals of how bank payment systems and processes work in this world.

So there could be insolvent Cypriot banks now, based on some level of unexpected withdrawal, but not ALL whale depositors could simultaneously and successfuly withdraw money from their bank.

Depositor withdrawals are limited to the amount their bank has in cash on hand plus its deposits in other banks (correspondents - due from account balances).

After these stocks are exhausted, any amounts transferred have to clear through a central bank account (which is a control on liquidity runs and an injection point for any discount window operations).

If the Cypriot bank tried to sell/settle its portfolio of investment securities, there would be a little more liquidity, but then the Cypriot bankers will face legal jeopardy from the European Union, AND the bankers on the other side of the transaction will face legal legal jeopardy (that is the point where the liquidation ends).  Whomever is wholesale funding the Cypriot banks will not aid or abet.  They do not want to be the next target of the EU governments.

In the course of the withdrawals, the cash and due from account stocks will run out, and other oligarchs will get pinched by the earlier ones, because the central bank in not intervening or providing any liquidity.

After a bit of liquidiation (there is insolvency), and I call bullsh*t on all the oligarchs having gotten out last week.  Not possible...unless it happened prior to the banks officially closing.



Tue, 03/26/2013 - 00:41 | 3375650 tom
tom's picture

I think the Reuters story is confusing but I don't see any factual inaccuracies.

The problem with the Reuters article is it fails to separate two distinct issues: withdrawals of funds from banks in Cyprus, and withdrawals of funds from Cyprus-owned banks in Russia and the UK. There are no capital controls on Cyprus-owned banks in Russia and the UK. BOC's and Laiki's foreign subsidiaries are as of today subject to the new, Cypriot central bank-appointed management of their parent banks. Since Laiki is being wound down it will have to sell its subsidiaries, or perhaps it will be forced to give them to BOC. Other than that the subsidiaries are on their own to continue operating. It's up to local central banks and regulators to determine if they are sound and decide whether or not to provide them with liquidity if they run out. Reuters is reporting on that angle in a very confusing way, suggesting that the money being pulled out of the subsidiary banks is leaking through the capital controls.

As for how money has been leaking out of banks, Reuters is actually underestimating the ways it could leak out. Besides cash ATMS, debit cards continued to work all week, and various kinds of payments were allowed.

This is the key paragraph in the Reuters article, again badly explained: "EU negotiators knew something was wrong when the Central Bank of Cyprus requested more banknotes from the European Central Bank than the withdrawals it was reporting to Frankfurt implied were needed, an EU source familiar with the process said. "The amount the Cypriots mentioned... on a daily basis was much less than it was in reality," the source said.

The CB of Cyprus doesn't actually request notes from the ECB, it prints notes and keeps a ready supply in a vault, and when Cypriot banks request to swap their reserves for notes, the Cypriot central bank delivers notes, cancels reserves, and tells the ECB what it did. That's the reporting that Reuters' source must be referring to: the EU negotiators heard from the ECB what the volumes of euro notes that Central Bank of Cyprus was delivering to Cypriot banks were. And they were much greater than the amounts that the Cypriot negotiators were claiming during the negotiations was being withdrawn.

This raises the question, which Reuters apparently didn't know to ask, of whether the Cypriot CB was also topping up Cypriot banks' reserves all week by lending them emergency liquidity assistance. If it did, then the notes being withdrawn were actually newly issued funds coming from the CB of Cyprus, and not from the banks' own liquidity. We might find out the answer later when the CB of Cyprus publishes its next monthly accounts.

Personally I don't believe Russian oligarchs had much money in Cypriot banks. They prefer Zurich. The Cyprus-owned banks in Russia are getting money from middle-class Russians. It's no surprise they've been pulling out but actually they are not being targeted by this bail-in.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:19 | 3375873 hooligan2009
hooligan2009's picture

whatever happened to zero's and one's at the flick of a switch? cash is not very portable and I doubt whether the inflows were in physical form.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 00:30 | 3375640 snblitz
snblitz's picture

Putin doesn't care about the Russian looses in Cyprus because those people were not his friends.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 00:42 | 3375653 pfairley
pfairley's picture

Your readers are not all drunks in a bar. Stop with sensationalizing speculations and forecasts, please. I rated this 1, poor.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:01 | 3375665 observer007
observer007's picture

Cypriot Banking Crisis - A Turning Point for Your Portfolio


Key point: with a fractional reserve banking system, it doesn't take a majority of bank depositors to decide to withdraw their cash to put their banks out of business. If something like 10% of depositors decided to withdraw all of their money, banks would be in real trouble - and even if only a smaller percentage were to initially decide to keep their cash at home, they could spook the required fraction into panicking and pushing the banks into insolvency

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:27 | 3375691 resurger
resurger's picture

So you are saying "Counter Terrorists Wins"

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 01:59 | 3375726 serema
serema's picture

outfit like this advice? Well, prom dresses for sale available are two accessible designers that come up again And again for me - entirely about every are popular for bridesmaid dresses, but I reckon you could happily cocktail dresses wear one of their creations as a bride (although if you’re going for many a traditional groom, hopefully this cheap bridesmaid dresses will inspire you for your girls). And of course the best element Not one costs more unlike £300 including post and of course packaging. Seriously.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 02:04 | 3375742 Meremortal
Meremortal's picture

Some people keep forgetting that if the Russians got their money out, there's no money to pay the Troika, so there's no deal.


Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:14 | 3375799 chindit13
chindit13's picture

Oops Tyler!

Here's an email response I got from someone who should know:

"Cypriot banks in the UK all operate as subsidiaries, not branches.  As subsidiaries they are capitalized and regulated as UK banks and fall under UK deposit guarantees.  A Russian with money in the UK subsidiary can get his money in and out."

Pending information to the contrary, I think my gut feel was right:  if the Troika is not in an emergency meeting right now, the situation---as bad as it is---was not additionally exacerbated by the done deal of major deposit outflows.


Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:16 | 3375871 hooligan2009
hooligan2009's picture

so could a russian borrow money (cash) from the london subsidiary secured on the deposit held in the parent in cyprus?

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 06:06 | 3375909 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

Thanks for the information re UK subsidiaries.

There's another aspect I wonder about re the two lame Cypriot banks in Cyprus. Were these two banks closed to the peasants (except for ATM) but open to whales who could request large withdrawals for humanitarian reasons. The peasants also have humanitarian needs (medical emergencies, etc) for larger withdrawals than ATM.  In fact, if anyone needs emergency funds for humanitarian needs for basic necessities it is the peasants caught in a suddenly cash economy. The great injustice to the Cypriot people is that the two banks were open to the humanitarian needs of the whales but not of the peasants.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 04:05 | 3375838 Super Broccoli
Super Broccoli's picture

and i was wondering how Putin managed to remain that cool yesterday  ... thanks or the answer

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 04:19 | 3375851 Hengist
Hengist's picture

My first time commenting keep up the cynicism and sarcasm please and the irony and goldy and silvery.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 04:36 | 3375859 Hengist
Hengist's picture

Well from a friend at work his mother has been affected by all this, she operates a tour business from Germany her clients are Russian and not the ultra rich just regular people.  They transferred money through Cypress just so hotel costs etc can be paid to third parties in say Egypt.  These are the type of accounts that have been frozen and subject to wahtever levy they decide.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:00 | 3375865 Svendblaaskaeg
Svendblaaskaeg's picture

der Spiegel: Cyprus Fallout: Moscow Accuses Euro Zone of Theft -- and Worse

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:15 | 3375870 goldenbuddha454
goldenbuddha454's picture

When it really comes down to it, doesn't this say F-You EU from London with Love?!  And that's why we still have that lovely piece of paper called a sterling!

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:20 | 3375874 luckylongshot
luckylongshot's picture

So the banksters get so greedy they go after peoples savings and then fuck it up completely. In a weird sense it is a good story as it makes them seem a little less formidable.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:50 | 3375889 Anasteus
Anasteus's picture

Great article.

The Cypriot president has probably done the worst job for the Cypriot people. He apparently failed to resist the pressure in Brussels and eventually screwed it all up. Poor Cypriots.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 05:47 | 3375896 goldenbuddha454
goldenbuddha454's picture

If things are this bad with a tiny country like Cyprus, what's going to happen when Italy decides they too no longer want to play ball?  Elephant Size SHTF!!!

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 06:03 | 3375906 GubbermintWorker
GubbermintWorker's picture

Annnnnd, it's gone!

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 07:13 | 3375907 hooligan2009
hooligan2009's picture

imagine the troika are lifeguards, although fat ones that are paid 2 million a year and use large power launches rather than floats

they spot a swimmer caught in a rip and paddle out

"we will rescue you, but we will need one of your legs and one of your arms..then later we will come back for your other limbs"

the russian blood donor friends of the swimmer (who donated blood from a previous shark attack) look on and offer a blood transfusion, provided they can recover the blood spilt from the troika operation.

Solidarnosc my friends.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 06:38 | 3375932 goldenbuddha454
goldenbuddha454's picture

Actually, how is the Cypriot President telling his family to get their money out before the collapse any different than the massive insider selling that's been going on in the U.S. market over the last year? 

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 07:02 | 3375957 Johnny Moscow
Johnny Moscow's picture

Never thought I'd say "Thank God my money is still safely in Russia!" but we live in strange times

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 07:28 | 3375998 Byte Me
Byte Me's picture

Considering that the EUR/GBP cross has strengthened noticeably from last Monday's gap open it's likely that a lot of hypothetically relocating money went through London.

The boys in Canary Wharf must be astonished with what's comming out of Berlin.


When does Germany intend to invade Poland? Someone remind me...

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 08:12 | 3376093 Trenchf00t
Trenchf00t's picture

Cyprus was junked a year ago! Do they really still have so much money over there?

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 08:16 | 3376102 Papasmurf
Papasmurf's picture

In local news, JPM reports it's balance sheet has never looked better.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 19:39 | 3379446 theprofromdover
theprofromdover's picture

I never understood how the meek are supposed to inherit the earth, but now it makes sense; they just inherit the liabilities.

Tue, 03/26/2013 - 21:46 | 3379893 MeelionDollerBogus
Tue, 03/26/2013 - 21:51 | 3379920 MeelionDollerBogus
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