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Merkel "Very Happy", Russian PM Furious: "The Stealing Of What Has Already Been Stolen Continues"

Tyler Durden's picture


First, it is Merkel's turn, which last week was furious at Cyprus for daring to reject the first flawed Eurogroup plan impairing insured depositors, only to praise it for now... rejecting said plan. To wit: Chancellor Angela Merkel, "as well as the government, is very happy that the troika, the euro group and Cyprus were able to reach an agreement," German government spokesman Steffen Seibert says in Berlin. He added that difficulties will arise in the short term because of measures aimed to scale back Cyprus’s banking sector, "but in the long run it will lead to a healthier” industry. That remains to be seen, especially when factoring in the Russian response.

Which wont be pleasant.

The official Russian line is one of a typical professional chess player - calm, cool, collected: Russia doesn’t see need to take any additional steps now, may still agree to restructure loan, First Deputy Prime Minister Igor Shuvalov told reporters earlier. Shuvalov, unlike Merkel and ECB's Mersch who sees nothing but green shoots (literally) everywhere in Europe, said that Russia is concerned Cyprus crisis may have negative effect on euro. The deputy PM says that he has no estimate for Russian losses in Cyprus but added that Russian money in Cyprus is "legal."

The unofficial line comes from former president, and current PM and Putin mouthpiece,Dmitry Medvedev. From Reuters:

Moscow reacted with anger on Monday to a European Union bailout of Cyprus that will result in heavy losses for foreign depositors at the Mediterranean island's banks, many of which are Russian.


"The stealing of what has already been stolen continues," Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev was quoted by news agencies as telling a meeting of government officials.


Russia turned down desperate appeals for financial aid last week from the Cypriot government and the final bailout was likely to be more painful for its depositors than an initial rescue plan rejected by the Cypriot parliament.


Speaking after the meeting, First Deputy Prime Minister Igor Shuvalov said losses to Russian investors in Cyprus were not yet clear.


He also said that the Cypriot unit of state-controlled VTB, Russian Commercial Bank, would not be affected by measures taken by the government.


"What is happening is a good signal to those who plan to move their capital to ... Russian banks," he was quoted as saying. "We have very stable banks."


Russians are believed to account for most of the 19 billion euros of non-EU, non-bank money held in Cypriot banks at the last count by the central bank in January. Of 38 billion euros in deposits from banks, 13 billion came from outside the EU.

In other news, we are closing our Belgian Caterer 3x long ETF, and opening a new 3x levered ETF in Belgian Bodyguards and Polonium 210 "tasters." We expect it to hit our price target of "more" shortly.


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Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:50 | 3371515 SafelyGraze
SafelyGraze's picture

tail risks

and those who are associated with tailrisk organizations

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:59 | 3371543 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

They just hit the gold market....must appear risk is gone in order to ramp the stock market.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:16 | 3371578 rogeliokh
rogeliokh's picture

And why is the Heck GOLD is down? Because Cyprus Pention funds and bank accounts over 100k were literally confiscated?  Those account will lose at least

30% but this is not all, they wont give any money back for a long time. This could take years. Is that's why market so happy about? Market should tank 1000

points instead. And GOLD down another complete absurd.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:19 | 3371586 TrumpXVI
TrumpXVI's picture

Remember that gold has a recent history of getting beat down hard just ahead of the Monday open.  May very well have nothing to do with Cyprus...the timing would suggest to me that it doesn't.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:39 | 3371650 flacon
flacon's picture

Gold options expiry today. 

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:55 | 3371738 CH1
CH1's picture

Maybe people are dumping their ETFs, in the wake of ABN Amro?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:57 | 3371747 YBNguy
YBNguy's picture

Is the Russian war ship still imbound?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:07 | 3371792 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

The Ruskies will have to stand in line, and wait their turn. 

This is the Med.

Long piano wire.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 11:49 | 3372470 eurogold
eurogold's picture

The Russians had their chance to "step up to the plate" and they didn't take it. Cypriots thought they could continue to swindle the EU.....well too bad it didn't work out for them.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:39 | 3371652 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



The beating down of gold is simply to shake some coins loose from the weak hands so that the CBs can hoard them at sale prices.  No mystery here.  And it will continue and become increasingly intense as the desparate CBs try to ward off the coming tempest.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:45 | 3371684 TrumpXVI
TrumpXVI's picture

Yeah, the CBs.....and little ol' me;-)

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:55 | 3371741 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

It is quite resilient as of late.

Russian oligarch's, and Mississippi lawmakers related to BP gulf spill?


Not so much..

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:41 | 3371663 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Wanna know what a Eurogroup is? "Yet another intelligence failure." it appears this type of failure is contagious as well. Gone...VIRAL (or is it visceral?) as it were.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:21 | 3371596 Popo
Popo's picture

Polonium won't be necessary.   When you control the flow of natural gas to Europe, exacting financial vengeance is simply a pricing issue.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:42 | 3371660 ACP
ACP's picture

Possibly, but a more direct method may be used by the Russian mob, since the pipelines do flow through countries where they can exert their influence to an extent that can't be controlled by Eurozone. Primarily, Belarus and Ukraine. Wouldn't be at all surprised to see some "accidents" happen.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:08 | 3371797 CitizenPete
CitizenPete's picture

They will get it back one Mcf at a time.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:22 | 3371598 Cdad
Cdad's picture

In other news slipped in under the radar jammer of Cyprus, dysfunctional US Senate passes a pay raise for themselves, attaches amendments for first budget since 2009 and $1 trillion in additional taxes.  Wal-Mart prepares new emails to read, "Shoppers obviously using invisibility pills."

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:44 | 3371678 exi1ed0ne
exi1ed0ne's picture

It's a BIG tell that the only people left in the market are:

1) Clueless about what is going on (sucker at the black jack table)

2) The very people whom this action benefits (banks, Gov't)

I mean seriously - you can't really draw any conclusions from one of the most manipulated markets in the history of mankind.  It's warm skittles freashly shart from the unicorn, all day every day.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:01 | 3371973 comrade rally monkey
comrade rally monkey's picture probkem.take the remaining cash and buy the SPY. Thet cant take thirty % of that.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:41 | 3371665 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

Adios Eurozone.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:45 | 3371681 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

are you leaving us? the door is open, but I never heard of a country called Stoploss   ;-)

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:01 | 3371546 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

Don't expect an immediate response from Russia, some dishes are best when served cold.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:07 | 3371560 Ralph Spoilsport
Ralph Spoilsport's picture

In New Soviet Europe, everything will be served cold next winter.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:26 | 3371879 Svendblaaskaeg
Svendblaaskaeg's picture

...but..but the climate crisis aka "Global Warming" will save the day? - no?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:17 | 3371582 BandGap
BandGap's picture

Who the fuck would have evr thought I'd fucking side with any Russian on any fucking thing to do with finances. Really, I hope these fuckers fucking start knocking off some of their European fucking opponents with the same zeal and efficiency that they do so within their own fucking borders.

Germany vs. Russia, round 3. Fucking get it on.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:28 | 3371614 aint no fortuna...
aint no fortunate son's picture

One wonders what those little scamps at the CIA were up to the last week or so...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 13:21 | 3372992 ceilidh_trail
ceilidh_trail's picture

You could google it.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:54 | 3371731 bernorange
bernorange's picture

"What is happening is a good signal to those who plan to move their capital to ... Russian banks," he was quoted as saying. "We have very stable banks."

Stealing money from depositors in offshore havens appears to be such good business that Russia is now thinking about jumping into it with up to $323B investment:

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 12:48 | 3372814 Mountainview
Mountainview's picture

Never forget,the money was not lost because of Russia but because of Greece and the European "solution" for the Greek problem. Cyprus serves Russian corporates as a tax optimzation platform like many other countries do the same service for US and European corporates.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:17 | 3371584 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

In large parts of Rus, those aren't mutually exclusive.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:28 | 3371618 a growing concern
a growing concern's picture

Ramping up ricin production in 3...2...1...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:49 | 3371698 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

Was blogging with a psycologist on another site.

From his experience dealing with victims of sociopaths,there is a delay

of about a month before people react.He thinks banks runs in the next

four weeks in the southern euro tier.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:49 | 3371517 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:52 | 3371526 short screwed
short screwed's picture

Don't forget to buy a housre either, before they're all gone!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:55 | 3371533 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Horse?  It's what's for dinner.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:01 | 3371548 TheLooza
TheLooza's picture

Can't you read? Buy a housre...A HOUSRE, man!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:10 | 3371571 sudzee
sudzee's picture

Well thats a housre of a different colour,
Housreradish, stop housre ing around.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:37 | 3371647 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

trojan housre

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:25 | 3371604 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Its a mobile ho... Nevermind

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:20 | 3371589 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

What? Buy a Mauser?! Okay, gotcha!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:50 | 3371518 OpenThePodBayDoorHAL
OpenThePodBayDoorHAL's picture

Malta is next

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:52 | 3371524 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

Everyone is next.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:44 | 3371676 defencev
defencev's picture

LOL (all the way to the... BANK).

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 11:13 | 3372283 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

@ zorba


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:52 | 3371716 Mister Ponzi
Mister Ponzi's picture

The most likely next candidate is Slovenia with a banking system that's as bankrupt as the ones in Ireland and Cyprus, a permanent recession and a government that has higher borrowing costs than Spain or Italy.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:00 | 3371766 machineh
machineh's picture

Few americanos could tell you the difference between Slovenia, Slovakia and sloe gin.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:16 | 3371830 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Sloe gin makes me sick. I'm unaffected by the others.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:28 | 3371885 treshold
treshold's picture

I hope they go bust separately as to minimize the confusion.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:50 | 3371519 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

The Russian deposits were gone soon after they were made. The bank bought Greek bonds.

The money went to keep the Greek Ponzi going. 

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:56 | 3371534 j0nx
j0nx's picture

Yup, the Russians bailed out Greece and they didn't even know it at the time. Ze Germans are playing a VERY dangerous game here and I'll bet Benny and the inkjets are in it balls deep.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:53 | 3371720 Unwashed
Unwashed's picture

...and Goldman Sachs was behind the the derivatives that helped Greece disguise their debt.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:40 | 3371661 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



I prefer Russian to Greek.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:25 | 3371873 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Russia needs to get together with other countries and make a financial statement.

As a thankk you they need to impact the markets and shake up fiat!!


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:51 | 3371520 fudge
fudge's picture

and boy wonder passes on the masters message :)))

 short flight insurance

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:50 | 3371522 razorthin
razorthin's picture

Will this be the Arch Duke Ferdinand moment?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:14 | 3371579 The Abstraction...
The Abstraction of Justice's picture

Personally I doubt it. We all know that when these debts are defaulted the governments will respond by confiscating foreign assets. No need, or gain, for them to declare World War III.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:51 | 3371523 carlsbro
carlsbro's picture

muahahhaha!! All ZHers dreaming about a war, counting their bullions. hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:56 | 3371537 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Just dreaming about all our millions in our 401Ks that we will lose on any given weekend.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:07 | 3371562 carlsbro
carlsbro's picture

Buy gold buy gold!!!. lolllllllllllllllllllllllll

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:19 | 3371566 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Just keep your money in the bank.........where it's safe and we can get to it.


Just understand we are not you.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:21 | 3371595 carlsbro
carlsbro's picture

Jhon Paulson Gold Fund is a better place. ROFL!!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:30 | 3371622 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Just get a boat....most banksters can't swim....let alone dive.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:41 | 3371664 carlsbro
carlsbro's picture

Jim Rogers and friends needs some ignorants to sell his gold and ZH is doing a good job

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:47 | 3371693 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Sell it for what?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:01 | 3371767 Ricky Bobby
Ricky Bobby's picture

Hey carlsbitch here is my tempered logical response to your posts.



Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:51 | 3371938 carlsbro
carlsbro's picture

Another clever gold investor. muahahhahhahaah!!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:31 | 3371628 Gief Gold Plox
Gief Gold Plox's picture

I can't. All my hard-earned money's stuck in some bank on Cyprus.

Oh, wait! No it fucking ain't.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 14:03 | 3373275 Mountainview
Mountainview's picture

@carlbro:the ranking of your lines could be a good contrary indicator!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:59 | 3371759 Never One Roach
Never One Roach's picture

If you don't hold it, you don't own it, amigo.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:59 | 3371542 fudge
fudge's picture

Not war too soon though , Id like to acquire some examples of the Russian Olympic coinage .. just momentos ...for the children of course ;)


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:53 | 3371528 Bicycle Repairman
Bicycle Repairman's picture

Fortunately only the Russians have "oligarchs" and "mouthpieces".

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:54 | 3371530 Ralph Spoilsport
Ralph Spoilsport's picture

"We make big trouble for moose and squirrel"

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:54 | 3371531 Wolferl
Wolferl's picture

Lol. The truth is that Merkel and Putin are in perfect agreement about this Cyprus event. The Kremlin now has even more control of the Russian oligarchs and the Russian economy. A win-win situation for Germany and Russia.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:57 | 3371540 j0nx
j0nx's picture

Indeed. Putin got to herd those cats back home and didn't even have to lift a finger to do it.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:27 | 3371610 SmallerGovNow2
SmallerGovNow2's picture

who cares about the cats, their money will be confiscated for the bailout.  so i don't see a lot returning to Russian banks.  there must be something else...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:39 | 3371654 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Perhaps Putin's rivals all had their money stashed there, and now they are a little less powerful to oppose him.

Also, there are still mountains of money being made in Russia and much of it will now remain there (where Putin can keep it safe) instead of fleeing to other tax havens.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:49 | 3371703 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

SOME of their money.  Some.  This plays into Putin's hands in several ways.  Further consolidation of his power within his own borders.  And did you notice his line about how Russian banks are extremely stable?  He's been on a mission to sound like he's all business friendly the last couple years- even did a Dog-n-Pony show in Silicon Valley not long ago. 

Come back to Jamaica (err, um, Russia)!  We're all warm and friendly, mon!  We won't steal your money like them other guys, mon!  Great place to do your biziness!


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:04 | 3371552 fudge
fudge's picture

Quite true , Vlad did want the cats and the roubles back inside the house Thing is though can he control a few vengeful cats ? I'd be more than a little concerned were I some EU people.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:18 | 3371832 Red Herring
Red Herring's picture

Speaking of Putin and cats...


A couple of years ago, Putin, Obama and Sarkozy had a bet during one of the G20 meetings about who was the best leader.  To settle the bet, they ordered a cat to be brought in.  The deal was: the one who will get the cat to eat a spoon of hot sauce will win.


So, Obama looks the cat dead in the eye, and gives it a long winded speach about how eating a spoonfull of the hot sauce will bring about hope and change we can all believe in.  The cat does not flinch.


Sarokozy says, screw this! grabs the cat, grabs the spoon and tries to force-feed the cat.  Of course, ends up spilling the hot sauce all over and gets covered with scrathces.  Not a drop in cat's mouth.


Putin says, all of you are amateurs.  He takes the cat, rubs its belly, until the cat is purring, then takes a spoonfull of hot sauce and shoves it in cat's ass.  The cat is howling and furiously licking its ass to get the sauce out, and licks every drop of it.  That's how we do it in Russia, Putin says, voluntarily and singing!



Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:06 | 3371558 TheLooza
TheLooza's picture

On point. but make no mistake, Putin will get a 2x multiplier by giving his people some red meat in the form of angry words.

It is better to be feared than loved, but it is best to be feared and loved, and your enemies feared and loathed.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 13:22 | 3372997 SDShack
SDShack's picture

I agree, Putin is playing chess for the long game. Merkel is just acting like any politician... she isn't looking beyond her next re-election campaign. She had a chance for 2 hail mary passes. The first one fell with a thud. The 2nd was completed. She is strengthened in Germany, but weaker everywhere else. I suspect all the Anti-EU parties are stronger today with this Cyprus "deal". The template has now changed the playbook going forward. This will be tried with every other crisis that pops up, and pushed even further. Eventually, a soverign won't back down, and it will all unravel. That is why the bankers had to take this out of parliament's hand for approval. They know they are losing control and are desperate to do anything to kick the can. They aren't even hiding it anymore. The EU is just one spark away from totally unraveling and the bankers know it most of all.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:56 | 3371536 bardot63
bardot63's picture

Now the cat is out of the bag - the ship has sailed - the genie has not only left the bottle but has left the building.  Everyone with real money, or just a little money, knows, or should know, he and his money are now targets of bankrupt, corrupt governments everywhere.   So much for "full faith and credit."   Players, like the anti-Putin Russian billionaire found dead in his London bathtub Saturday, now check for horse heads under the sheets. 

It turns out it's true that you can't solve debt problems by going deeper into debt.  Governments running the printing presses at full speed are recognizing this only now.  Plan B is to skip the messy paperwork of debates and votes and taxation and inflation  and just go for the cash. 

Cyprus is in Europe but this is a US Fed test runThe Fed Reserve's fingerprints are all over Cyprus and they ain't even trying to hide it The big players know this, and that means the big players across the globe are going to be the next to panic, after the little Cypriot nobodys who are lined up at ATMs right now at midnight to get 100 bucks a day of their own money.     The players only hope that you and I will wait to panic later.   He who panics first panics best.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:09 | 3371568 toys for tits
toys for tits's picture

"It turns out it's true that you can't solve debt problems by going deeper into debt."

Apparently the Troika has figured that out.  Now they're solving debt problems by stealing other peoples' money to whom they were entrusted.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:19 | 3371587 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Looks like you are going to have to settle for plan C, and i'll be the first to warn ya. Yee ain't gonna like plan sea.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:21 | 3371591 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

They Shoot Horses, Dont They?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:31 | 3371626 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Perhaps, but look at those around you. History is very very clear on all this.  Not a damn thing will change until the supply lines break and folks are faced with the fact that modern eCONomics is completely detached from reality.  Once more people start starving, some real efforts to prosecute the fraud and make some real changes towards a real fucking market that allows for true price discovery, but I doubt it.  The world will simply become like Russia post-collapse.  There will be "official" prices in the official "markets", and then there will be the prices that everyone actually pays.  No one is going to qualify for any type of credit except for the ivy-league chosen few.  I'd like to be optimistic and think the heads of the latter will roll, but I just don't see that happening with the average sheep being what they are.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:38 | 3371649 defencev
defencev's picture

One word: BULLSHIT!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 07:58 | 3371539 sumo
sumo's picture

This has to be what passes for theatre among the KGB set. Putin knew Cyprus had to cut a deal with someone; he must have known what would happen when he said nyet.

What is his game here? Is he convinced Cyprus will still need a Russian bailout, so he is making moves now to get better terms later?

Or is this about chasing Russian money back into Russian banks? Is that more valuable than a naval port in Cyprus and a stronger supply line to Syria?

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:05 | 3371554 Super Broccoli
Super Broccoli's picture

i find them really cool ... wouldn't have expected some Putin rage threatening a termo-nuclear war or some kinda shit like that

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:06 | 3371557 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

Even if Cyprus parliament approval may not be required, Parliament can choose to get involved as much as it wants to reject or approve or modify the deal. Parliament just passed a whole series of banking laws. Parliament can certainly decide whether to accept or reject this whopper of a deal.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:04 | 3371785 machineh
machineh's picture

As with the USA-PATRIOT Act, they passed it without reading it.

Over the next few days, they (and we) will learn what's in it.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:06 | 3371559 khotel
khotel's picture

Zoloto suka!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:04 | 3371783 Never One Roach
Never One Roach's picture

Canuckhead, good article. I've read the best places for these Russian and Chinese embezzlers to hide include Canada, UK and usa where they stash Z-Billions and face no extradition. Nice deal for both parties; the ocuntry gets lots of loot and the embezzler gets a safe haven.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:41 | 3371915 Canucklehead
Canucklehead's picture

I think the next decade will see graft/corruption wrung out of the system as there will be no place to hide. The hot money laundering spots are becoming well known. Thanks to the internet, the process used is becoming well known (though it doesn't appear to have changed much from BCCI days).

The next thing is for the electorate to hold the wrong-doers accountable. That has always been the difficult task, especially with low-information voters...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:09 | 3371567 tradewithdave
tradewithdave's picture

Just wait till they discover that their 7-11 Big Gulps are missing...


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:10 | 3371572 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

Russia should see if they can have their dollars converted into RIMM shares.  Win-win

BlackBerry down 6% in premarket after Goldman cut

Goldman Prop is making some money.  Z10 sales must have been better than expected.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:24 | 3371603 Zer0head
Zer0head's picture

The BBG Bimbos echo chambered same this AM exclaiming that when GS did an audit of nearly (twenty) 20 stores and found the new Blackberry Z10's hidden in the back -


meanwhile just a week ago GS did an audit of 40 stores GS said the opposite


When the eff does an audit of 20 or even 40 stores mean anything -- in a universe of literally tens if not hundreds of thousands of stores




Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:11 | 3371573 Quick
Quick's picture

Has any country requiring a bailout only needed one ??

What happens next time with Cyprus ?  Greece ?  Spain ?  Italy ?  etc. etc.

What does the immediate/intermediate future hold for the EU ?

Inquiring minds etc. etc.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:20 | 3371593 SmallerGovNow2
SmallerGovNow2's picture

capital flight...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:38 | 3371648 Van Halen
Van Halen's picture

Quick - Cyprus will now be the example for all the rest of the nations needing bailouts. Need money from us? Not a problem, just hand over the deposits of "The Wealthy" and everything will be fine.

The whole concept of saving/depositing your money for safekeeping is now dead. And in the next few episodes, watch as "The Wealthy" become accounts with >90K euros, >80K euros, etc..

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:47 | 3371690 scatterbrains
scatterbrains's picture

good point this is only their first chomp at the apple taking out the 100k+ crowd. Next time they'll probably be looking for a 50/50 split deal with the below 100k+ crowd.. and it will be great news for the good of the country blah blah etc etc

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:00 | 3371762 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

you just hurry up and run back and re spin that plate....

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:13 | 3371576 agent default
agent default's picture

To call a spade a spade, this is nothing short of Barbarossa II as far as the Russians are concerned.  There will be retaliation over this one.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:15 | 3371580 CDNX fan
CDNX fan's picture

Just BTFD and relax - this is just another attempt to pump the p.m.'s so everybody feels warmer and cuddlier about their horridly-performing "stacks". Buy common shares of quality companies and rake in those big fat dividends while the doom-and-gloomers obsess over the rapidly-depreciating stacks of gold and silver coinage that pays nothng but continues to decline in value. Since 2008, you have had a near-catastrophic meltdown of banks, $100 oil, money printing by every government on the face of the planet, bail-outs, bail-in's, and phony CPI and unemployment numbers - the PERFECT STORM for the gold/silver bugs - and yet you are $300/oz. under the 2011 Au peak and $20/oz under the 2011 Ag peak. That tells me that the big money has now flattened the trade from 1999 and are moving back to stocks, which only recently hit a record high. The Gold/Dow ratio looks ominously bent toward 1:30 as opposed to 1:1  so you "stackers" better wake up.

How do I know this? 

Robert Mugabe told me so.....

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:02 | 3371974 Shell Game
Shell Game's picture

What dip, dipshit?  Oh, you mean BTFP(arabola).  yeah, about that..  When your 401k/pension is seized you will buy the parabola and you will like it!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:17 | 3371581 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

The Euro politicians have to be careful.  They may not get too many protests this time around.


Instead, the "older masses" may just roll over and "fall asleep" - Europe may go from 400M to 200M overnight and those who are left will rename Europe to Eurabia.


Europe's capital may move from Brussels to Istanbul.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:27 | 3371583 ElZorillo
ElZorillo's picture

The promise to honour the 100k depositor guarantee is a con.. They dont want a bank run in other member states to occurr. This will placate the masses and give the troika enough time to arrange another bigger hit on the rest of EU accounts WITHOUT any such depositor protection in the not too distant future.


It's coming.. take measures to protect your savings.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:30 | 3371623 falak pema
falak pema's picture

that 100 K guaranty exists accross the board in ALL EZ countries subsequent 2008. So its not an expedient. Its in stone.

Not saying tsunamis can't move stones...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:32 | 3371632 laomei
laomei's picture

It's insurance until you actually need it. Then you discover it was just some assholes stealing your money.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:39 | 3371653 Van Halen
Van Halen's picture

It was a brilliant play using class warfare and class envy. Lots of people are waking up to this news today and thinking, "Good! Those rich guys got what was coming to them!"

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:19 | 3371585 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Yes! The Vlad Put!

Its the suspense that gets ya!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:20 | 3371592 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

'Americans' doing what they do best: stealing.

'American' saying: if you cant join them, beat them, if you cant beat them, join them.

'Americans': join them and thieve. Dont join them and be thieved.

Theft down all the road.

Theft at the core of 'americanism'.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:29 | 3371619 Rusty Trombone
Rusty Trombone's picture

China have many nut on warr - say "Warnuts"

China have many many nut on chest  - say "Chesnuts"

China have many many nut on chin - say "Chin-nuts".

Americanism say " No, No, No That call My Dick In You Mouth"

So Solly.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:06 | 3371789 bunnyswanson
bunnyswanson's picture  Inspite of me - Morphine:  Cure For Pain

So cruel.  Disbelief but proud to be a step up on your way, a part of your illustrious career.  So cruel.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:29 | 3371621 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

America is no longer a major player in the steel industry, but they are still #1 in the steal industry.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:36 | 3371641 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

By far. Noone can compete with 'americans' when it comes to theft.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:33 | 3371895 bunnyswanson
bunnyswanson's picture

Hey fuck face, yeah I am talking to you.  There are many in this world who, as an entire nationality can be deemed as "difficult" but it is not the Americans.  Americans are a melting pot of so many different ethenities, which have stayed true to themselves, regardless of assimiliating with the nation's  Baseball Apple Pie and Erections on Demand propaganda that fills the airways.  We are all loyal to the freedom the USA allows us.

The crooks?  Who are they?  Do I HAVE TO TELL YOU??? do I have to tell you who has orchestrated this fucking robbery you piece of shit?  Fuck you and anyone reading this crap he spews, and up arrows him?  What a loser you are!  If America ceases to exist, the middle class will completely COMPLETELY disappear and the man in charge of you, when ther eare no witinesses, will determine whether you are worthy to breathe the same air as hime.

You are diverting attention away from the perpetrators and WE KNOW WHO THEY ARE.\

You think I'm a thief?  (Storm is coming)


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:38 | 3371908 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

agree with the sentiment

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:42 | 3372134 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture


By far. Noone can compete with 'americans' when it comes to theft.

The delusion or the duplicity is thicker than I thought.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 13:38 | 3373104 ceilidh_trail
ceilidh_trail's picture


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:21 | 3371851 exgop
exgop's picture

Wake up !! It's the Jews !!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:46 | 3371687 exgop
exgop's picture

It's the Jews dummy

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:37 | 3371905 stacking12321
stacking12321's picture

no, dummy, it's *some* jews, some christians, some muslims, etc.

blaming a whole race is what intellectually lazy / sloppy people do, they can't be bothered to think or examine specific instances.

much easier to say it's all those jews over there causing the problem, not us, we couldn't possibly be to blame, we're the good guys, we're not like THEM!

 it's "the jews" who are taking our money or "the mexicans" who are taking our jobs, or "the muslims" who are terrorists.

sigh, not much point discussing with stupid folk who can't be bothered to see things for what they are.


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 09:53 | 3371945 exgop
exgop's picture

keep those blinders on stacking12321

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 12:21 | 3372667 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

"Jews", aka Ashkenazim, are not a race.  They're a tribe.

Definition: "tribe"
any aggregate of people united by ties of descent from a common ancestor, community of customs and traditions, adherence to the same leaders, etc.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:17 | 3372035 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

AnAnonymous driveled:

'Americans' doing what they do best: stealing.

'American' saying: if you cant join them, beat them, if you cant beat them, join them.

'Americans': join them and thieve. Dont join them and be thieved.

AnAnonymous Chinese citizenism propagandists: join them and grieve. Don't join them and endure their pouring repeations of drivel that can not be believed.

Time to work, Chinese Communautist propagandists, because the quality level of drivel vomited is low, extremely low. All you do is letting your proponents naked by providing so little cover...

Theft down all the road.

Theft at the core of 'americanism'.

Crap down all the roadside.

Public roadside squatting and crapping at the core of Chinese citizenism.

But hey, at the least roadside crap gives a more solid ground than their cheap propaganda.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:21 | 3371594 rsnoble
rsnoble's picture

I know 3 russians and all have the same attitude.  Yes, cool calm and collective.  Until they lose.  Then watch out.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:33 | 3372098 Klaus Daimler
Klaus Daimler's picture

Collective, rather than collected?  Well played, sir.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:33 | 3372100 Klaus Daimler
Klaus Daimler's picture

Collective, rather than collected?  Well played, sir.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:21 | 3371597 Rusty Trombone
Rusty Trombone's picture

Here comes the 8:20 fall off a cliff.....

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:23 | 3371600 tedstr
tedstr's picture

Just the local Burgher stealing from the peasants.  Nothing to see here folks move along.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:23 | 3371601 new game
new game's picture

nothing is off limits, your livihood in essence, ie private property and your freedom just all took a direct hit.

plan accordingly.  this is moving slow, but will gather momentum and be in your neighborhood before to long.

time is running out as many in eu will say soon.

only one option left with excess private property...

the tax man, locked and loaded, is making the rounds.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:26 | 3371606 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

The world is dominated by 'americanism', that since 1776, July, 4th, has been deployed to destroy freedom, truth and justice. Those three have taken hits since that day like never a tyrant managed before.

The future will be 'american'

Hedge accordingly.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:42 | 3371666 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Because before then, autocrats and plutocrats (a staple industry, in your beloved red China) were well-known for their just ways and fair treatment of their countrymen. Otherwise, there'd be a document somewhere declaring exactly which principles were being violated and how, right?

I know the idea of questioning your leadership is illegal, but you can do it anyway.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:29 | 3372079 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

AnAnonymous squatted and dropped:

The world is dominated by 'americanism', that since 1776, July, 4th, has been deployed to destroy freedom, truth and justice. Those three have taken hits since that day like never a tyrant managed before.

Please stop low cost propaganda. It has been debunked centuries ago now and people no longer has to invest to bring up solid debunkmentationary facts.

Congenitate cheapness in Chinese citizenism propagation reveals desperate times for Chinese Communautist Party Ministry of Truth. Cheap propaganda reflective of cheap propagandists. Peking lame duck.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 13:42 | 3373130 ceilidh_trail
ceilidh_trail's picture

cHiNee economy built on back of ming-foxconn slaves.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 13:49 | 3373174 akak
akak's picture

Funny, AnAnnoyingMouse, how there is no figure in US 'american' history (even in your twisted, alternate reality version of it) to compare to your honored Great Helmsman, Mousy Dung, who killed tens of millions of his OWN  citizens in such glorious escapades of Chinese Citizenism as the Great Leap into Starvation, or the so-called "Cultural Revolution", in which millions of academics were killed or put into forced manual labor, books were burned, and the cultural works and acheivement of millenia were smashed and destroyed, all for the glory of the Chinese Communist State.  What a legacy of which you have to be proud!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:29 | 3371620 zdk45
zdk45's picture

One knows when to admit defeat re: economy. First today's historic Cyprus Jubilee. And now, per Bloomberg: "Payroll Growth Vaults to Higher Pace at U.S. Companies" with overwhelming supporting evidence, "Circle Foods, LLC...Has created the new position of human resources training manager."

Well, Suspenders...I, was wrong.


F. Y. B.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:30 | 3371625 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Who wants to give me odds on Putin taking the Georgia, Syria, and Iraq Trifecta?


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:34 | 3371634 billybobtx
billybobtx's picture

PM's collapsing on margin calls and need for liquidity...nobody can get at their cash. Should be a SERIOUS bounce soon. 10-years should skyrocket on the flight to safety.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:35 | 3371637 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Cue GazProm "tightening" of natgas flows...

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:41 | 3371662 realtick
realtick's picture

notice how they timed this power play with the arrival of spring

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:37 | 3371642 Debugas
Debugas's picture

"The stealing of what has already been stolen continues"

Very well said - first they stole russia's resources sold them and put the money in Cyprus banks. Now they themselves got robbed.

In the end this lesson is good both for europe and for russia - everyone should keep his money at homeland

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:50 | 3371710 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Everyone should avoid saving their hard-earned capital in fractionally-levered "banks".


Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:37 | 3371646 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Meantime, on the other side of the Meditarranean,
Spain Brings the Pain to Bank Investors
Government to Impose Heavy Losses on Shareholders and Bondholders, Hire Advisers to Help Manage Lenders' Assets

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:43 | 3371651 Anasteus
Anasteus's picture

Cyprus is virtually toast. It's banking system is broken, unreliable, and since yesterday also confirmed as thieving. The rest of money will outflow as soon as possible and none bigger investor will ever deposit it's money out there. The Russians are furious and the revenge can be expected soon. Cyprus seems to be a test how far they can go by getting away with it. Once it all calms down the puppet masters can proceed further with the takeover using more draconic measures.

Sadly, the Cypriots have solved absolutely nothing. They only bought a short time by destroying the integrity of the country. In few months the country will be hit much harder with no any armament left. The result will be absorption of Cyprus into a monolithic state being gradually established behind the scenes. Cyprus is the first test experiment of this scenario.

I wonder why the Cypriot parliament can't figure this out. They paid a lot for literally nothing at all. Their only chance it to reject the 'agreement' and to strive for exit while they can.

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:44 | 3371674 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

EU as Borg assimilation. Apt!

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 08:50 | 3371709 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

the way you write this it sounds that monetary unions that can be exited are somehow harder than those where there is no option of leaving - please reply by identifying the "monolithic state" that is supposed to incorporate Cyprus

Mon, 03/25/2013 - 10:46 | 3372146 Anasteus
Anasteus's picture

The monolithic state is a logical consequence of unsustainable economics in the EU member states. It was certainly planned long ago as the bankers are not stupid and they know very well what the very resulting output will look like. To avoid destructive disintegration after the end game (by keeping the power and the control over the member countries, of course) the only possibility is to transform the national states into an integrated controlled state based on different principles such as central planning. The party could only be spoiled when (some) states escape, which would lead to unpredictable and possibly very dangerous consequences for the oligarchs. That's why Greece and no one else is easily allowed to leave the Eurozone regardless of their economic situation; the economic situation is irrelevant when compared to the big picture; sooner or later all countries will end up the same way anyway. However, the states can still leave the Eurozone if they are able to understand what's going on and are strong enough to take responsibility for themselves - it's still time to do that.

Most politicians are ignorant having no idea about the picture behind the scenes; they are like hamsters running in the wheel. Many others are aware but profiting from the situation. Upcoming riots and the overall worsening of the situation, however, could help them realize it better.

And, no, it has nothing to do with conspiracy theory. It's a logical consequence of the situation regarding the similar experience in history.

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