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Toys"R"Us Withdraws IPO After Dismal Earnings

Tyler Durden's picture




 

It seems equity markets at all-time highs, high-yield funding markets near all-time low yields, and supposed money on the sidelines flooding back into stocks are just not enough to provide cover for the latest IPO:

  • *TOYS R US FILES TO WITHDRAW IPO :TOYS US

Not citing any specific reasons for the withdrawal, we suspect the weather and market conditions will be blamed as they just reported abysmal earnings of $239mm vs $343mm last year and sales down $155mm from last year (with Q4 comp sales -4.5% domestically and 5.4% international). Back to the drawing board for KKR and Bain to push this off to the next greater fool.

 

Via EDGAR:

The Registration Statement was filed in connection with the proposed initial public offering by Toys “R” Us, Inc. of its common stock, which Toys “R” Us, Inc. has determined not to pursue at this time.

 

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Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:37 | 3389025 HulkHogan
HulkHogan's picture

I tried to work at Toy R Us when I was in college. I didn't pass the drug test.

 

 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:42 | 3389039 Lost Wages
Lost Wages's picture

You should have applied at Trip Toys R Us.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:08 | 3389092 SafelyGraze
SafelyGraze's picture

IPOus interruptus

aka aristocratican roulette

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:53 | 3389627 Xibalba
Xibalba's picture

Wait...earnings matter?!?!?!  Somebody tell AMZN

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:25 | 3389178 bank guy in Brussels
bank guy in Brussels's picture

When I spent some time in the USA a couple decades ago, one day was with a mom talking about going shopping there for her kids but for some reason she called it

We Be Toys

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:37 | 3389213 BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

No need to go to Toys "R" Us when one can go to Walmart or Target and get everything else for the house while you're there. You can even go to the $Store and pick a fishnet stocking full of toys for $2.

As cool as the Star Wars Lego Millenium Falcon is...the average person cant pay $179.99 for it...

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | 3389233 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

Thrift Store, Goodwill, Craigslist or just share toys. Toys Are Us.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | 3389234 natronic
natronic's picture

It's called Spencers

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | 3389235 natronic
natronic's picture

It's called Spencers

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:45 | 3389047 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boris is try to join Russian Army but is cannot pass drug test. Must is drink two magnum but Boris is passed out after only drink one.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:05 | 3389082 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

yeah... they just have to high of a standard for us...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OuhnhPLhNw&sns=em

In the meanwhile...

a burglar killed a woman who was waiting for the police...
a second plan flew into the twin towers because no figher jets where in the air...
a man died of a hart attack because the medics didn't come in time...
A house burnt to the ground because the fire brigade didn't come...
.. ... ...

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 18:36 | 3389755 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Hey Boris, You weren't part of Putin's security detail in Durban were you?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2299961/Putins-armed-bodyguards-...

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 23:25 | 3390648 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

No, Boris is fail civil service examination, but funny story because Boris is once carry "nuclear suitcase" like Putin Security Detail. Boris is was custodial engineer at Chernobyl and must is evacuate quickly with all personal effects can fit in one bag.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:48 | 3389056 Cycle
Cycle's picture

Illegal Drug Deficiency Syndrome (IDDS)  happens to the best.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:56 | 3389074 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

I applied for police academy just to freak my dad out when I was a student :) I said I wanted to do something totally different :)

I had him going for a year untill he said: if that's what you wanne do...
than I said: HELL NO!!!! HAHAHAHA :)

A full year :)

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:00 | 3389085 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

lucky bastard

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:08 | 3389514 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

You have to worry about people who can work there all day unmedicated.

Sat, 03/30/2013 - 08:10 | 3391089 Go Tribe
Go Tribe's picture

Cheap fucking crap, overpriced. I hope they go under.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:42 | 3389037 denverdolomte
denverdolomte's picture

You'd think the Vatican at the very least would have "vested" interest in keeping this place going. 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:58 | 3389078 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

who knew capital "sins" and cardinal "virtues" could get so confused

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:43 | 3389044 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

You can't always toy with investors.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:49 | 3389057 Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

But you can play with yourself.

FORWARD SOVIET!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:57 | 3389075 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

... name one that doesn't....

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:54 | 3389067 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

WHY?!?!?!?!?

The biggest company on earth is also a toymaker!!! TOYSRUS COULD EASELY BE VALUED AT 400 maybe 500 BILLION DOLLAR!!!

THE STOCKMARKET LOVES PLASTIC CRAP AND THEY DON'T EVEN NEED TO GIVE A DIVIDEND!!!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:19 | 3389152 bloostar
bloostar's picture

They pay in plastic tiddlywinks is why.. :-)

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:44 | 3389244 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

Those plastic tiddlywinks always appriciating against the Dollar.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:53 | 3389068 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

A giraffe can only stretch the numbers so far

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:55 | 3389073 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

I thought the only thing a kid wants these days is an E-Trade account

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:59 | 3389077 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Drone Geoffrey's ass!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:00 | 3389084 JP McManus
JP McManus's picture

100% Bullish

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:07 | 3389104 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Next up: Reverse IPO with Zynga.

For teh lulz, of course.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:14 | 3389131 bloostar
bloostar's picture

I tried to buy a toy at Toys R Us. Gave up after crossing the threshold of the door. Blaring music, rude staff, chuggers (charity muggers) on the way out and, frankly (but with respect to said man), a pile of cheap plastic cr&p on dispay everywhere. The business is doomed.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:22 | 3389164 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

I had the exact same experience in the halls of congress

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:14 | 3389133 neutrinoman
neutrinoman's picture

Quit toying with us :)

"Weather" ... "market conditions" ... this is starting to sound a lot like the old days of the Soviet Union, when some hiccup in central planning would embarrass the powers that were.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:18 | 3389148 Cursive
Cursive's picture

I'm picturing the PE guys wrapping their lips around this shit sandwich much Michele Bachmann.  Gag on it!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:24 | 3389168 wonderatitall
wonderatitall's picture

the rich democrat gangstas will find it was bush's fault...damn him trying to make our racist vacationer in drone look bad

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:24 | 3389173 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Fuck Toys R Us

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:26 | 3389184 spentCartridge
spentCartridge's picture

Box of (strike anywhere) matches and a rubber band.

 

That's all you need to entertain any kid.

 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:36 | 3389216 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Add some black powder and I'm sold.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:41 | 3389229 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

army men and a bb gun

lighter fluid and balsa wood fliers

a catholic dress code and girls who refuse to honor it

 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:36 | 3389217 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

a Lego toy consisting of 10 pieces is like $50-of course half of that goes to royalties to yids like spielberg and lucas if it is a movie-themed set.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | 3389232 Village Smithy
Village Smithy's picture

Just like Apple, Toys R Us has been running on its share of the $50 billion per year of unpaid mortage payments or "squatter's rent". Starting up the foreclosure machine again meant drying up that source of discretionary income. Oh those unintended consequences hey Mr. Bernanke.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:55 | 3389268 I am a Man I am...
I am a Man I am Forty's picture

Who needs fucking toys when you have an iPad.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:31 | 3389579 dolph9
dolph9's picture

Kids can't eat an iPad.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:26 | 3389880 mkhs
mkhs's picture

Not many vitamins in legos.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 20:54 | 3390148 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

They *can* eat the tiny plastic pieces of the cheap Chinese crap toys at Toys R Us.... 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:58 | 3389274 Hongcha
Hongcha's picture

Cheap Chinese sweatshop toxic sludge-drawn plastic crap, planned obsolescence.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 16:02 | 3389281 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

     We be " Toys" and shit.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 16:24 | 3389350 virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

This co. peaked in the early 90.s and WS is trying to get the carcass off their books. They should ask how Barnes and Nobles is doing with their ploy..toy sales (lol).  Notice at all of these retail chains you have to walk through a gauntlet of useless cra,,p to get to the checkout counter?

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 16:50 | 3389455 WTF_247
WTF_247's picture

Toys R Us is in the same predicament that other retail is in.  They have way, way overused "sales" to lure customers in.  Toys R Us regularly has 1 day sales, 2 day sales and the like.

People will not buy unless its on sale - people also realize that the sale price is likely all the item is worth in the first place (and so does the store).  Toys R Us sells board games (sorry, monopoly) for like $25.00 - its a piece of cardboard with a few pieces of plastic - its not worth 25 bucks.  So people wait for sales to buy stuff - hence the missed earnings. 

No different than Guitar Center - every weekend is "mondo blowout prices" ... why would anyone shop there during the week?

All retail is falling into this same trap.  The internet has made it much easier to price compare so now the only tool they have left is putting crap on sale to be the cheapest for a few days.  There is very little brand loyalty - no one cares if you buy the cheap crap china toy from Toys R Us, Target, Walmart - whoever has it the cheapest will get the sale.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:00 | 3389489 flacorps
flacorps's picture

Welcome to run-off mode now that the private equity boys are discouraged.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:30 | 3389575 dolph9
dolph9's picture

I blame the people for not having enough kids and not buying enough cheap toys from China.

Can't you see?  The banks and corporations depend on you to breed like rabbits and spend all of your money.

Get to it!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:37 | 3389582 Monedas
Monedas's picture

Toys R Us should sell stun guns for infants .... to go on their tricycle handlebars .... and on their stroller trays .... so 13 month old babies .... can defend themselves !  They could change their name:  Hi-Tek 4 Tots !  Sell higher margin electronics .... board games = bored games !

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 18:29 | 3389731 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

Y U No Buy Guy?

Everybody sing along now:

"Where have all the Muppets gone,

Long time passing,

Where have all the Muppets gone,

Long time ago....."

 

 

 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 18:51 | 3389802 monopoly
monopoly's picture

ToysRUs, Best Buy, Radio Shack, Sears, have one important item in common. They will all go  Poof!! No More. And just what we need, more empty retail space. Gotta be something bullish about that somehow.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:09 | 3389842 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

psst! try calpers, they'll buy anything

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:15 | 3389859 Kreditanstalt
Kreditanstalt's picture

This kind of market darling outfit has a simple business model: import cheap plastic crap from China, display it in expensively lit and designed retail stores and set sky-high sales prices...

...all now in an economy in which I'm deciding whether we can afford to eat out once a month and spend a lot of my time picking up refundable beer cans and scrounging firewood for next winter, the better to avoid sky-high electricity and gas prices...

There's more and more like me all the time.  Return-Free-Risk'R'Us...

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:40 | 3389904 ghostfaceinvestah
ghostfaceinvestah's picture

Good for nothing but showrooming, same as any physical retailer selling hard goods these days.

Sat, 03/30/2013 - 09:50 | 3391206 tedstr
tedstr's picture

more insanity.  A) the toy business may be the only business shittier than the airline business.  B) This company has already gone bankrupt at least once.  Now they want an IPO.  Perfect.  Just perfect.  Maybe the market actually found someone who said no. "I already gave it all to Facebook"

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