Toys"R"Us Withdraws IPO After Dismal Earnings

Tyler Durden's picture

It seems equity markets at all-time highs, high-yield funding markets near all-time low yields, and supposed money on the sidelines flooding back into stocks are just not enough to provide cover for the latest IPO:

  • *TOYS R US FILES TO WITHDRAW IPO :TOYS US

Not citing any specific reasons for the withdrawal, we suspect the weather and market conditions will be blamed as they just reported abysmal earnings of $239mm vs $343mm last year and sales down $155mm from last year (with Q4 comp sales -4.5% domestically and 5.4% international). Back to the drawing board for KKR and Bain to push this off to the next greater fool.

 

Via EDGAR:

The Registration Statement was filed in connection with the proposed initial public offering by Toys “R” Us, Inc. of its common stock, which Toys “R” Us, Inc. has determined not to pursue at this time.

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HulkHogan's picture

I tried to work at Toy R Us when I was in college. I didn't pass the drug test.

 

 

Lost Wages's picture

You should have applied at Trip Toys R Us.

SafelyGraze's picture

IPOus interruptus

aka aristocratican roulette

Xibalba's picture

Wait...earnings matter?!?!?!  Somebody tell AMZN

bank guy in Brussels's picture

When I spent some time in the USA a couple decades ago, one day was with a mom talking about going shopping there for her kids but for some reason she called it

We Be Toys

BLOTTO's picture

No need to go to Toys "R" Us when one can go to Walmart or Target and get everything else for the house while you're there. You can even go to the $Store and pick a fishnet stocking full of toys for $2.

As cool as the Star Wars Lego Millenium Falcon is...the average person cant pay $179.99 for it...

Bunga Bunga's picture

Thrift Store, Goodwill, Craigslist or just share toys. Toys Are Us.

Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boris is try to join Russian Army but is cannot pass drug test. Must is drink two magnum but Boris is passed out after only drink one.

Sudden Debt's picture

yeah... they just have to high of a standard for us...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OuhnhPLhNw&sns=em

In the meanwhile...

a burglar killed a woman who was waiting for the police...
a second plan flew into the twin towers because no figher jets where in the air...
a man died of a hart attack because the medics didn't come in time...
A house burnt to the ground because the fire brigade didn't come...
.. ... ...

Boris Alatovkrap's picture

No, Boris is fail civil service examination, but funny story because Boris is once carry "nuclear suitcase" like Putin Security Detail. Boris is was custodial engineer at Chernobyl and must is evacuate quickly with all personal effects can fit in one bag.

Cycle's picture

Illegal Drug Deficiency Syndrome (IDDS)  happens to the best.

Sudden Debt's picture

I applied for police academy just to freak my dad out when I was a student :) I said I wanted to do something totally different :)

I had him going for a year untill he said: if that's what you wanne do...
than I said: HELL NO!!!! HAHAHAHA :)

A full year :)

ThisIsBob's picture

You have to worry about people who can work there all day unmedicated.

Go Tribe's picture

Cheap fucking crap, overpriced. I hope they go under.

denverdolomte's picture

You'd think the Vatican at the very least would have "vested" interest in keeping this place going. 

DaveyJones's picture

who knew capital "sins" and cardinal "virtues" could get so confused

Peter Pan's picture

You can't always toy with investors.

Chuck Walla's picture

But you can play with yourself.

FORWARD SOVIET!

Sudden Debt's picture

... name one that doesn't....

Sudden Debt's picture

WHY?!?!?!?!?

The biggest company on earth is also a toymaker!!! TOYSRUS COULD EASELY BE VALUED AT 400 maybe 500 BILLION DOLLAR!!!

THE STOCKMARKET LOVES PLASTIC CRAP AND THEY DON'T EVEN NEED TO GIVE A DIVIDEND!!!

bloostar's picture

They pay in plastic tiddlywinks is why.. :-)

Bunga Bunga's picture

Those plastic tiddlywinks always appriciating against the Dollar.

DaveyJones's picture

A giraffe can only stretch the numbers so far

dark pools of soros's picture

I thought the only thing a kid wants these days is an E-Trade account

ParkAveFlasher's picture

Drone Geoffrey's ass!

NotApplicable's picture

Next up: Reverse IPO with Zynga.

For teh lulz, of course.

bloostar's picture

I tried to buy a toy at Toys R Us. Gave up after crossing the threshold of the door. Blaring music, rude staff, chuggers (charity muggers) on the way out and, frankly (but with respect to said man), a pile of cheap plastic cr&p on dispay everywhere. The business is doomed.

DaveyJones's picture

I had the exact same experience in the halls of congress

neutrinoman's picture

Quit toying with us :)

"Weather" ... "market conditions" ... this is starting to sound a lot like the old days of the Soviet Union, when some hiccup in central planning would embarrass the powers that were.

Cursive's picture

I'm picturing the PE guys wrapping their lips around this shit sandwich much Michele Bachmann.  Gag on it!

wonderatitall's picture

the rich democrat gangstas will find it was bush's fault...damn him trying to make our racist vacationer in drone look bad

q99x2's picture

Fuck Toys R Us

spentCartridge's picture

Box of (strike anywhere) matches and a rubber band.

 

That's all you need to entertain any kid.

 

NotApplicable's picture

Add some black powder and I'm sold.

DaveyJones's picture

army men and a bb gun

lighter fluid and balsa wood fliers

a catholic dress code and girls who refuse to honor it

 

otto skorzeny's picture

a Lego toy consisting of 10 pieces is like $50-of course half of that goes to royalties to yids like spielberg and lucas if it is a movie-themed set.

Village Smithy's picture

Just like Apple, Toys R Us has been running on its share of the $50 billion per year of unpaid mortage payments or "squatter's rent". Starting up the foreclosure machine again meant drying up that source of discretionary income. Oh those unintended consequences hey Mr. Bernanke.

I am a Man I am Forty's picture

Who needs fucking toys when you have an iPad.

mkhs's picture

Not many vitamins in legos.

SokPOTUS's picture

They *can* eat the tiny plastic pieces of the cheap Chinese crap toys at Toys R Us.... 

Hongcha's picture

Cheap Chinese sweatshop toxic sludge-drawn plastic crap, planned obsolescence.

Yen Cross's picture

     We be " Toys" and shit.

virgilcaine's picture

This co. peaked in the early 90.s and WS is trying to get the carcass off their books. They should ask how Barnes and Nobles is doing with their ploy..toy sales (lol).  Notice at all of these retail chains you have to walk through a gauntlet of useless cra,,p to get to the checkout counter?

WTF_247's picture

Toys R Us is in the same predicament that other retail is in.  They have way, way overused "sales" to lure customers in.  Toys R Us regularly has 1 day sales, 2 day sales and the like.

People will not buy unless its on sale - people also realize that the sale price is likely all the item is worth in the first place (and so does the store).  Toys R Us sells board games (sorry, monopoly) for like $25.00 - its a piece of cardboard with a few pieces of plastic - its not worth 25 bucks.  So people wait for sales to buy stuff - hence the missed earnings. 

No different than Guitar Center - every weekend is "mondo blowout prices" ... why would anyone shop there during the week?

All retail is falling into this same trap.  The internet has made it much easier to price compare so now the only tool they have left is putting crap on sale to be the cheapest for a few days.  There is very little brand loyalty - no one cares if you buy the cheap crap china toy from Toys R Us, Target, Walmart - whoever has it the cheapest will get the sale.