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Toys"R"Us Withdraws IPO After Dismal Earnings

Tyler Durden's picture


It seems equity markets at all-time highs, high-yield funding markets near all-time low yields, and supposed money on the sidelines flooding back into stocks are just not enough to provide cover for the latest IPO:


Not citing any specific reasons for the withdrawal, we suspect the weather and market conditions will be blamed as they just reported abysmal earnings of $239mm vs $343mm last year and sales down $155mm from last year (with Q4 comp sales -4.5% domestically and 5.4% international). Back to the drawing board for KKR and Bain to push this off to the next greater fool.



The Registration Statement was filed in connection with the proposed initial public offering by Toys “R” Us, Inc. of its common stock, which Toys “R” Us, Inc. has determined not to pursue at this time.


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Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:37 | Link to Comment HulkHogan
HulkHogan's picture

I tried to work at Toy R Us when I was in college. I didn't pass the drug test.



Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:42 | Link to Comment Lost Wages
Lost Wages's picture

You should have applied at Trip Toys R Us.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:08 | Link to Comment SafelyGraze
SafelyGraze's picture

IPOus interruptus

aka aristocratican roulette

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:53 | Link to Comment Xibalba
Xibalba's picture

Wait...earnings matter?!?!?!  Somebody tell AMZN

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:25 | Link to Comment bank guy in Brussels
bank guy in Brussels's picture

When I spent some time in the USA a couple decades ago, one day was with a mom talking about going shopping there for her kids but for some reason she called it

We Be Toys

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:37 | Link to Comment BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

No need to go to Toys "R" Us when one can go to Walmart or Target and get everything else for the house while you're there. You can even go to the $Store and pick a fishnet stocking full of toys for $2.

As cool as the Star Wars Lego Millenium Falcon is...the average person cant pay $179.99 for it...

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | Link to Comment Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

Thrift Store, Goodwill, Craigslist or just share toys. Toys Are Us.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | Link to Comment natronic
natronic's picture

It's called Spencers

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | Link to Comment natronic
natronic's picture

It's called Spencers

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:45 | Link to Comment Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boris is try to join Russian Army but is cannot pass drug test. Must is drink two magnum but Boris is passed out after only drink one.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:05 | Link to Comment Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

yeah... they just have to high of a standard for us...

In the meanwhile...

a burglar killed a woman who was waiting for the police...
a second plan flew into the twin towers because no figher jets where in the air...
a man died of a hart attack because the medics didn't come in time...
A house burnt to the ground because the fire brigade didn't come...
.. ... ...

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 18:36 | Link to Comment palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Hey Boris, You weren't part of Putin's security detail in Durban were you?

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 23:25 | Link to Comment Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

No, Boris is fail civil service examination, but funny story because Boris is once carry "nuclear suitcase" like Putin Security Detail. Boris is was custodial engineer at Chernobyl and must is evacuate quickly with all personal effects can fit in one bag.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:48 | Link to Comment Cycle
Cycle's picture

Illegal Drug Deficiency Syndrome (IDDS)  happens to the best.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:56 | Link to Comment Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

I applied for police academy just to freak my dad out when I was a student :) I said I wanted to do something totally different :)

I had him going for a year untill he said: if that's what you wanne do...
than I said: HELL NO!!!! HAHAHAHA :)

A full year :)

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:00 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

lucky bastard

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:08 | Link to Comment ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

You have to worry about people who can work there all day unmedicated.

Sat, 03/30/2013 - 08:10 | Link to Comment Go Tribe
Go Tribe's picture

Cheap fucking crap, overpriced. I hope they go under.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:42 | Link to Comment denverdolomte
denverdolomte's picture

You'd think the Vatican at the very least would have "vested" interest in keeping this place going. 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:58 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

who knew capital "sins" and cardinal "virtues" could get so confused

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:43 | Link to Comment Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

You can't always toy with investors.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:49 | Link to Comment Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

But you can play with yourself.


Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:57 | Link to Comment Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

... name one that doesn't....

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:54 | Link to Comment Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture


The biggest company on earth is also a toymaker!!! TOYSRUS COULD EASELY BE VALUED AT 400 maybe 500 BILLION DOLLAR!!!


Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:19 | Link to Comment bloostar
bloostar's picture

They pay in plastic tiddlywinks is why.. :-)

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:44 | Link to Comment Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

Those plastic tiddlywinks always appriciating against the Dollar.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:53 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

A giraffe can only stretch the numbers so far

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:55 | Link to Comment dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

I thought the only thing a kid wants these days is an E-Trade account

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 14:59 | Link to Comment ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Drone Geoffrey's ass!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:00 | Link to Comment JP McManus
JP McManus's picture

100% Bullish

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:07 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Next up: Reverse IPO with Zynga.

For teh lulz, of course.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:14 | Link to Comment bloostar
bloostar's picture

I tried to buy a toy at Toys R Us. Gave up after crossing the threshold of the door. Blaring music, rude staff, chuggers (charity muggers) on the way out and, frankly (but with respect to said man), a pile of cheap plastic cr&p on dispay everywhere. The business is doomed.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:22 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

I had the exact same experience in the halls of congress

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:14 | Link to Comment neutrinoman
neutrinoman's picture

Quit toying with us :)

"Weather" ... "market conditions" ... this is starting to sound a lot like the old days of the Soviet Union, when some hiccup in central planning would embarrass the powers that were.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:18 | Link to Comment Cursive
Cursive's picture

I'm picturing the PE guys wrapping their lips around this shit sandwich much Michele Bachmann.  Gag on it!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:24 | Link to Comment wonderatitall
wonderatitall's picture

the rich democrat gangstas will find it was bush's fault...damn him trying to make our racist vacationer in drone look bad

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:24 | Link to Comment q99x2
q99x2's picture

Fuck Toys R Us

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:26 | Link to Comment spentCartridge
spentCartridge's picture

Box of (strike anywhere) matches and a rubber band.


That's all you need to entertain any kid.


Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:36 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Add some black powder and I'm sold.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:41 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

army men and a bb gun

lighter fluid and balsa wood fliers

a catholic dress code and girls who refuse to honor it


Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:36 | Link to Comment otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

a Lego toy consisting of 10 pieces is like $50-of course half of that goes to royalties to yids like spielberg and lucas if it is a movie-themed set.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:42 | Link to Comment Village Smithy
Village Smithy's picture

Just like Apple, Toys R Us has been running on its share of the $50 billion per year of unpaid mortage payments or "squatter's rent". Starting up the foreclosure machine again meant drying up that source of discretionary income. Oh those unintended consequences hey Mr. Bernanke.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:55 | Link to Comment I am a Man I am...
I am a Man I am Forty's picture

Who needs fucking toys when you have an iPad.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:31 | Link to Comment dolph9
dolph9's picture

Kids can't eat an iPad.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:26 | Link to Comment mkhs
mkhs's picture

Not many vitamins in legos.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 20:54 | Link to Comment SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

They *can* eat the tiny plastic pieces of the cheap Chinese crap toys at Toys R Us.... 

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 15:58 | Link to Comment Hongcha
Hongcha's picture

Cheap Chinese sweatshop toxic sludge-drawn plastic crap, planned obsolescence.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 16:02 | Link to Comment Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

     We be " Toys" and shit.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 16:24 | Link to Comment virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

This co. peaked in the early 90.s and WS is trying to get the carcass off their books. They should ask how Barnes and Nobles is doing with their ploy..toy sales (lol).  Notice at all of these retail chains you have to walk through a gauntlet of useless cra,,p to get to the checkout counter?

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 16:50 | Link to Comment WTF_247
WTF_247's picture

Toys R Us is in the same predicament that other retail is in.  They have way, way overused "sales" to lure customers in.  Toys R Us regularly has 1 day sales, 2 day sales and the like.

People will not buy unless its on sale - people also realize that the sale price is likely all the item is worth in the first place (and so does the store).  Toys R Us sells board games (sorry, monopoly) for like $25.00 - its a piece of cardboard with a few pieces of plastic - its not worth 25 bucks.  So people wait for sales to buy stuff - hence the missed earnings. 

No different than Guitar Center - every weekend is "mondo blowout prices" ... why would anyone shop there during the week?

All retail is falling into this same trap.  The internet has made it much easier to price compare so now the only tool they have left is putting crap on sale to be the cheapest for a few days.  There is very little brand loyalty - no one cares if you buy the cheap crap china toy from Toys R Us, Target, Walmart - whoever has it the cheapest will get the sale.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:00 | Link to Comment flacorps
flacorps's picture

Welcome to run-off mode now that the private equity boys are discouraged.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:30 | Link to Comment dolph9
dolph9's picture

I blame the people for not having enough kids and not buying enough cheap toys from China.

Can't you see?  The banks and corporations depend on you to breed like rabbits and spend all of your money.

Get to it!

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 17:37 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Toys R Us should sell stun guns for infants .... to go on their tricycle handlebars .... and on their stroller trays .... so 13 month old babies .... can defend themselves !  They could change their name:  Hi-Tek 4 Tots !  Sell higher margin electronics .... board games = bored games !

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 18:29 | Link to Comment Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

Y U No Buy Guy?

Everybody sing along now:

"Where have all the Muppets gone,

Long time passing,

Where have all the Muppets gone,

Long time ago....."




Fri, 03/29/2013 - 18:51 | Link to Comment monopoly
monopoly's picture

ToysRUs, Best Buy, Radio Shack, Sears, have one important item in common. They will all go  Poof!! No More. And just what we need, more empty retail space. Gotta be something bullish about that somehow.

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:09 | Link to Comment buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

psst! try calpers, they'll buy anything

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:15 | Link to Comment Kreditanstalt
Kreditanstalt's picture

This kind of market darling outfit has a simple business model: import cheap plastic crap from China, display it in expensively lit and designed retail stores and set sky-high sales prices...

...all now in an economy in which I'm deciding whether we can afford to eat out once a month and spend a lot of my time picking up refundable beer cans and scrounging firewood for next winter, the better to avoid sky-high electricity and gas prices...

There's more and more like me all the time.  Return-Free-Risk'R'Us...

Fri, 03/29/2013 - 19:40 | Link to Comment ghostfaceinvestah
ghostfaceinvestah's picture

Good for nothing but showrooming, same as any physical retailer selling hard goods these days.

Sat, 03/30/2013 - 09:50 | Link to Comment tedstr
tedstr's picture

more insanity.  A) the toy business may be the only business shittier than the airline business.  B) This company has already gone bankrupt at least once.  Now they want an IPO.  Perfect.  Just perfect.  Maybe the market actually found someone who said no. "I already gave it all to Facebook"

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