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Japan Prepares To Fight Three Front 'War'

Tyler Durden's picture





 

First there was Japan's 'capture' of the Senkakus and the looming troubles that small island will lead to with the Chinese. Then came the economic deflationary spiral, as the global devaluation of developed market currencies prompted Japan to start an aggressive currency war of their own. And now, with North Korea's sabre rattling growing ever louder, Fox News reports that following comments by Japan's Yoshihide Suga on "destroying any missile heading towards Japan," the North Koreans retorted with a threat that Tokyo would be the first target if they decide to play the nuclear card. Luckily, we have John Kerry on the spot, "if Kim Jong Un decides to launch a missile, whether it's across the Sea of Japan or some other direction, he will be choosing willfully to ignore the entire international community," as he weighed in on comments leaked yesterday that North Korea now had the know-how to arm a ballistic missile with a nuclear warhead - even if the weapons would lack reliability. Which is worse an unreliable nuclear missile or a reliable one? Though there is a silver lining, since if a broken window creates a Keynesian utopia, just think of the GDP-boosting greatness of a nuclear explosion in the heart of Roppongi.

 

Via Fox News,

North Korea reportedly warned Japan that Tokyo would be the first target if Pyongyang decides to play its nuclear card.

 

...

 

"We are doing all we can to protect the safety of our nation," chief Cabinet spokesman Yoshihide Suga said, though he and Ministry of Defense officials refused to confirm the reports about the naval alert, saying they do not want to "show their cards" to North Korea.

 

Japanese officials long have feared that North Korea not only has the means but several potential motives for launching an attack on Tokyo or major U.S. military installations on Japan’s main island.

 

...

 

Kerry also weighed in on an intelligence report that rocked Washington on Thursday and suggested that North Korea now had the knowhow to arm a ballistic missile with a nuclear warhead -- even if the weapons would lack reliability. Citing the Pentagon's assessment, Kerry rejected the finding and said that Pyongyang still hadn't developed or fully tested the nuclear capacities needed for such a step.

 

Speaking beside Kerry, South Korea Foreign Minister Yun Byung-se called for more United Nations action against Pyongyang if it commits another provocation.

He refused to comment specifically on the U.S. intelligence report, saying only that the North has "high nuclear and missile capabilities" but that it is still some time away from a nuclear bomb that is "small, light and diversified."

...

"They have to be really serious," Kerry said. "No one is going to talk for the sake of talking and no one is going to play this round-robin game that gets repeated every few years, which is both unnecessary and dangerous."

 


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Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:50 | Link to Comment High_on_Sarcotics
High_on_Sarcotics's picture

This will end fantastically. It's been a while since I've seen really good fireworks! :)

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:56 | Link to Comment Aknownymouse
Aknownymouse's picture

Yea. That explains why the vix is barely hanging on to 12. Geeezzz.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:03 | Link to Comment New England Patriot
New England Patriot's picture

In other news, oil was discovered in North Korea.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:06 | Link to Comment trebuchet
trebuchet's picture

haha and PRC would just say never mind, lets get our oil at 20 times the price from the Mid East, coz its just too easy paying an extra bag of rice for them barrels on our doortstep

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:10 | Link to Comment Dark_Horse
Dark_Horse's picture

 

Where's the modern Gulf of Tonkin when you need one?

Dark_Horse

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:16 | Link to Comment rajat_bhatia
rajat_bhatia's picture

I wonder. When the future is as dark as you guys say, when everything is going to shit, I wonder, why should I continue to live and tho through that misery and die at the end, why not commit suicide right now and be rid of the future of misery ..

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:17 | Link to Comment McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

Be of good cheer. We'll have the chance to take some of the people who think they're untouchable with us before the end.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:23 | Link to Comment rajat_bhatia
rajat_bhatia's picture

What's the point my brothers? isn't an injection of morphine induced final sleep better?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:28 | Link to Comment New England Patriot
New England Patriot's picture

No. The horrors of life are but a shadow of the evilness of death. Why run towards it?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:38 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

So... TEPCO has already murdered Tokyo, but Li'l Kim is gonna get the blame?

Gee, it's almost as if he was born to be the world's biggest fall guy.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:45 | Link to Comment Precious
Precious's picture

Yah Tyler.  Roppongi, where all the douchebag, lowlife foreigners hang out at the bar businesses that cater to them.  And the HQs of the naive, self-important foreign corportions like Goldman, Google, etc. etc. and the half-assed Japanese english major CEOs with personal identity crisis. Guess your idea wouldn't be so bad. Would save Japanese people a lot of time getting rid of that pompous shit some other way.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:42 | Link to Comment Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

The Japanese Govt brought this upon themselves if a war really becomes a reality. I feel sorry for the Japanese citizens but if they aint going to fend for themselves, well too fuckin bad.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 16:23 | Link to Comment MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

Nuking Japan?!?

Talk about carrying coals to Newcastle.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:18 | Link to Comment Matt
Matt's picture

What did the Japanese do, exactly, to provoke North Korea?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:55 | Link to Comment Bicycle Repairman
Bicycle Repairman's picture

Japan is fighting Fukushima on a fourth front, and I'm considering launching a fifth front.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:04 | Link to Comment akak
akak's picture

Hard to imagine a nation fighting a war on three fronts when they can't even defend themselves from their own idiocy, geological certainty and one wayward rat.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:08 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

That's what happens when one person swears to obey another, rather than judging every request on its own merits.

BTW, judges don't like it when you refuse, as it insults them while leaving the window open for that nasty ole legal idea of nullification (I also haven't had a jury summons in the five years since).

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:46 | Link to Comment Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

NK would be aiming the nuke for US soil but because of reliability, the nuke will most likely end up landing in Japan, hence Piglet Jr is warning Japan.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:22 | Link to Comment Matt
Matt's picture

While it would make more sense to aim North to go over the pole, I guess they don't want to fire over China and piss off their only substantial ally.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 22:42 | Link to Comment palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Japan has been marked for death since Fukushima and 3 11 11 (322).

Probably a specific condition dictated by China as a quid pro quo for the Globalists if they insist on making China the wheelhouse/redoubt of their Luciferian endgame.

Sat, 04/13/2013 - 05:07 | Link to Comment ClumsyBoatman
ClumsyBoatman's picture

can you repeat in engrish prease?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:44 | Link to Comment The Heart
The Heart's picture

"So... TEPCO has already murdered Tokyo,..."

Bing-badda-bang! You got it brother.

"We are doing all we can to protect the safety of our nation," chief Cabinet spokesman Yoshihide Suga said,..."

Horse blah-blah! It is no secret that japan cares not for it's own people, or the worlds people either. Talk about a boat load of slop bucket tripe, everybody knows that clowns like this blabbering liar, (the one thing the japs are really good at still) are kowtowing to the globalist population reduction agenda, and coming world war to cover up the dead banks a'crashin.

Fear fear fear...eat some at a TV near you soon. More fear fear fear for desert too...what's on the drug TV?

Meanwhile, the babylonians are doing their dastardly worst behind the distractions galore for the mass-mind to consume. History repeats itself:

http://constitutionalistnc.tripod.com/hitler-leftist/id14.html

http://www.maxexchange.com/ybj/chapter16.htm

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 19:27 | Link to Comment HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

Someone had to take Saddam's and Osama's place.  Its like the latest Hollywood celeb, but they come up with new ones to be Un Popular.

Hmmm. . . I don't imagine most of us speak Korean, and we cant trust the mainstream media or government anyway. There's no telling what they said or didnt say.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:28 | Link to Comment tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

The fun in life is living it. Why surrender to evil when you can enjoy fighting it?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:29 | Link to Comment McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

My mom has said much the same as you, and I don't begrudge people for thinking that way. But she's old, and her reasoning is that she wouldn't last long once everything goes to hell. In my opinion, those of us who are in decent health have a moral obligation to stick around and try to fix things as much as we can.

This mess is a lot to process, but a bit of booze (or other stuff) can help take the edge off every now and then.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:41 | Link to Comment Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Washington State Bud

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 16:26 | Link to Comment ghandi
ghandi's picture

Matanuska Thunderfuck

Sat, 04/13/2013 - 10:50 | Link to Comment prains
prains's picture

one man's "bit" is another man's 2four, I'm trying to come up with a cocktail called the "hedge" but need help with ingredients, it needs to be impolite to the palette at first taste but upon further consideration a rainbow of possiblities emerge and as you swallow a sharp kick to the balls buckles you to your knees.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:26 | Link to Comment Town Crier
Town Crier's picture

What is it that Kim and his advisors are always looking at, through binoculars?  Kim: "I see sign in Austin, Texas... it say, 'BIG HAT, NO CATTLE.'  What that mean?"  On the other hand, the US Gov. lies about everything on earth except North Korea, right?  

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:31 | Link to Comment New England Patriot
New England Patriot's picture

It's symbolic of them taking the "long-view." 

 

Propaganda at its finest.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:31 | Link to Comment AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

 

 

birds

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 19:32 | Link to Comment HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

"What is it that Kim and his advisors are always looking at, through binoculars?"

Kim:  "Whoa !  Check out that hottie at 2 o'clock !"

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 22:49 | Link to Comment palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Methinks Kim inadvertently subscribed to an Infowars podcast.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:20 | Link to Comment New England Patriot
New England Patriot's picture

Cheerfully withdrawn.

Sat, 04/13/2013 - 15:13 | Link to Comment TPTB_r_TBTF
TPTB_r_TBTF's picture

 

 

North Korean Missile Test

Delayed by Windows 8

 

North Korea’s official news agency announced today that the military’s planned missile test had been put on hold because of “problems with Windows 8.”

 

Intelligence analysts said that the announcement gave rare insight into the inner workings of North Korea’s missile program, which until last year had been running on Windows 95.

 

The New Yorker
Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:19 | Link to Comment ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Can I have your gold, when you are dead?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:24 | Link to Comment rajat_bhatia
rajat_bhatia's picture

Sure, I'm sure you'll be able to bring it with yourself beyond the pearly gates :-) 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:56 | Link to Comment ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

The pearly gates are out of my control to open or close, for myself and/or anyone else.

I'm thinking of this life, and of those who will follow me through it, in my care. 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 20:34 | Link to Comment Tompooz
Tompooz's picture

Talking about pearly gates, have you fightclub lovers already read Palahniuk's latest novel "Damned"?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:21 | Link to Comment spinone
spinone's picture

Don't get carried away.  The human race is always on the verge of disaster

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:28 | Link to Comment rajat_bhatia
rajat_bhatia's picture

LOL, but ZH makes it sound like it is on the verge... Makes me sad. :'( 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:49 | Link to Comment TPTB_r_TBTF
TPTB_r_TBTF's picture

hmm?  makes me glad.

We get to rebuild.

Rise like a Phoenix.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 19:42 | Link to Comment HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

Yep, the world has been like this for thousands of years. A small group of parasites living off of everyone else. They use manipulation so that people become their own prison guards. If we could magically snap our fingers and wake up everyone in the world, this shit would end instantly.

Regardless, this is the time in history when more people are aware of this fact than possibly during any previous era. We are blessed to live at a time where there is the possibility that humanity may break out of its self imposed mental prison.

Wouldnt miss it for the world.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:37 | Link to Comment viahj
viahj's picture

per Life of Brian:

 

 

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...
And...

...always look on the bright side
of life...
(Whistle)

Always look on the light side
of life...
(Whistle)

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle
- that's the thing.
And...always look on the bright
side of life...
(Whistle)

Come on.

Always look on the right side
of life...
(Whistle)

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain
with a bow
Forget about your sin - give the
audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance
anyhow.

So always look on the bright side
of death...
(Whistle)

a-Just before you draw your terminal breath...
(Whistle)

Life's a piece of shit, when you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true
You'll see its all a show, keep 'em laughin as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you

And...
Always look on the bright side
of life...
(Whistle)

Always look on the right side
of life...

C'mon Brian, cheer up

Always look on the bright side
of life...

Always look on the bright side
of life...

Worse things happen at sea you know.

I mean - what have you got to lose?
You know, you come from nothing
- you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing.

Always look on the right side
(I mean) of life...

what have you got to lose?
You know, you come from nothing
- you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost?

Always (Nothing.) look on the right side of life...

Nothing will come from nothing ya know what they say?
Cheer up ya old bugga c'mon give us a grin!
There ya go, see!

Always look on the right side of life...
(Cheer up ya old bugga c'mon give us a grin! At same time)

There ya go, see!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:22 | Link to Comment Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

Can I have your stuff?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:26 | Link to Comment rajat_bhatia
rajat_bhatia's picture

Of course, but I doubt yhoull be able to accomplish anything with any amount of riches I give you, looking at the time that's about to come. 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:31 | Link to Comment Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

You're probably right - I won't be able to put a dent in it, but my wife could put Brewster to shame.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:31 | Link to Comment enloe creek
enloe creek's picture

yeah, it's over, dump your rubbish and head for the mountains, forget society. they don't appreciate you anyway. 

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 23:15 | Link to Comment WallowaMountainMan
WallowaMountainMan's picture

"I wonder. When the future is as dark as you guys say, when everything is going to shit, I wonder, why should I continue to live and tho through that misery and die at the end, why not commit suicide right now and be rid of the future of misery .."

 

beats me.

:)

Sat, 04/13/2013 - 22:03 | Link to Comment Jake88
Jake88's picture

Sounds like a plan. Good luck with that.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:48 | Link to Comment victor82
victor82's picture

Economic Uncertainty?

War will be provided! The Yellow Press is at your service!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:09 | Link to Comment DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

@ New England Patriot

They apparently have large deposits of rare earth metals.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:19 | Link to Comment hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

Those Asians are war mongerers!

I just hope the United States doesn't have to again invade North Korea, again invade Japan, again invade China, again invade Vietnam, or again invade Russia. 

The shit we do to "defend" our North American homeland.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:21 | Link to Comment AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

"homeland security" invades your daughter's privacy legally just to get on a plane to see grandma.

 

All that gun right don't mean squat when you let idiots trample on all of your other rights.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:50 | Link to Comment hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

Don't let me forget that I hope the United States doesn't have to again invade Cambodia...

...before those blood-thirsty war mongers attack us here in North America.

 

I especially hope that our defenses can keep those Afghani war mongers pinned down in THE LONGEST WAR IN AMERICAN HISTORY that we might finally be allowed to live in peace here in our North American homeland.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:57 | Link to Comment ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

"I remember when I was with Special Forces. Seems a thousand centuries ago. We went into a camp to inoculate the children. We left the camp after we had inoculated the children for polio, and this old man came running after us. He was crying. He couldn't see. We went back there, and they had come and hacked off every inoculated arm. There they were in a pile. A pile of little arms. And I remember I … I … I cried. I wept like some grandmother. I wanted to tear my teeth out. I didn't know what I wanted to do. And I want to remember it. I never want to forget it. I never want to forget.
And then I realized, like I was shot! Like I was shot with a diamond … a diamond bullet right through my forehead. And I thought: My God, the genius of that! The genius! The will to do that! Perfect, genuine, complete, crystalline, pure. And then I realized they were stronger than we, because they could stand that these were not monsters. These were men, trained cadres — these men who fought with their hearts, who had families, who had children, who were filled with love — but they had the strength, the strength to do that.  If I had ten divisions of those men, then our troubles here would be over very quickly."

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:22 | Link to Comment hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

"We train young men to drop fire on people, but their commanders won't allow them to write "fuck" on their airplanes because it's obscene!"

Sat, 04/13/2013 - 22:05 | Link to Comment Jake88
Jake88's picture

yeah what's your point.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:41 | Link to Comment Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

+100

Colonel Walter E. Kurtz

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 16:56 | Link to Comment lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

If americans stopped whining and took arms and overthrew their warmongering dictatorship, they could use the US as a force for good in the world...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:27 | Link to Comment Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Then we dance the Hangman Style!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:02 | Link to Comment toys for tits
toys for tits's picture

A slight correction, the official start to Vietnam by Americans was 1955, which means that war lasted justed under 20 years.

Afgan is at 11.5 years now and is the second longest.

All these wars make me sick.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:38 | Link to Comment Rustysilver
Rustysilver's picture

Toys for tits,

Unofficially the stuff started happening in Vietnam after WW2 when we invited Chinese. But the official story is so much cleaner and short.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:18 | Link to Comment Desert Irish
Desert Irish's picture

Hedgeless

You forgot Cambodia, Lao, the Philippines and Taiwan (formerly Formusa before US backed Chaing Kai Shek turned up and wiped out a bunch of the locals)....and that's just in Asia.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:20 | Link to Comment vspam
vspam's picture

No other country has invaded more countries than the US.  Obama's Asia Pivot is showing some fruit.  Nobel Peace Prize winner will usher in a new world war.  

Sat, 04/13/2013 - 08:15 | Link to Comment Mark Urbo
Mark Urbo's picture

No - that comment would come from Steve in Virgina...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:08 | Link to Comment GolfHatesMe
GolfHatesMe's picture

if anything happens Potter will bring the VIX down to 6

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:00 | Link to Comment azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Krugman gets a little boner over this war talk. Imagine the stimulus and as a bonus a lot of the peasantry is killed off

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:10 | Link to Comment HD
HD's picture

Some things should remain private. Mrs. Krugman's pet name for her husband "little boner" is none of our business.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:43 | Link to Comment Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

I thought Krugman referred to his house-boy has "little boner"?

Confused.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:22 | Link to Comment nasdaq99
nasdaq99's picture

Belarus next

 

Layoffs for 25% of Belarusian civil servants
 
12.04.2013 16:03

MINSK, 12 April (BelTA) – As many as a quarter of the personnel employed by government agencies and organizations in Belarus will be laid off. The move is stipulated by Belarus president decree No. 168 on measures to optimize the system of government agencies and other state-run organizations as well as the number of their personnel. President of Belarus Alexander Lukashenko signed the decree on 12 April, the press service of the Belarusian leader told BelTA.

The decree provides for reducing the number of employees of government agencies and organizations by 25% on the average, said the press service.

The decree will introduce a new structure for local executive bodies, procedures to set the number of employees for the administration of concerns, state institutions that report directly to central government agencies, public sector organizations financed by oblast, basic, and primary budgets, district and rural executive committees.

Apart from that, the Council of Ministers is expected to come up with proposals by 1 May 2013 to raise the financial security of civil servants. The Council of Ministers will also work together with the Belarus President Administration and the State Secretariat of the Security Council of the Republic of Belarus to optimize the existing network of diplomatic missions and consular in

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:27 | Link to Comment hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

God bless Lukashenko!

Sat, 04/13/2013 - 08:13 | Link to Comment Mark Urbo
Mark Urbo's picture

That's great !  We a 50% cut here in the US - government spending is nutty out of control...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:25 | Link to Comment mac768
mac768's picture

Really too bad for the souls at Roppongi, an area that features numerous bars, nightclubs, strip clubs, restaurants, hostess clubs, cabarets, and other forms of entertainment. Among the expatriate community, the area tends to be favored by business people, students, and off-duty US military personnel. Overall, the neighborhood caters to a younger crowd... so maybe Ketchup Kerry is not to be seen there.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:42 | Link to Comment Disenchanted
Disenchanted's picture

What about the 4th front at Fuk-U-shima?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:04 | Link to Comment bankrun
bankrun's picture

*North Korea* nuclear *attack* misses Tokyo by a little, hits Fukushima. Tepco off the hook for clean up, and further radioactivity blamed on North Korea. US levels North Korea and establishes a stronger military presence on the boarder of China. Kim Jung-Fade never found, but presumed dead. National World News has years of covers with age progressed photos of him with JFK, Hitler, and Elvis (and maybe Tupac) living in hiding together.

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:08 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

I see you found my copy of the script.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:41 | Link to Comment Jam Akin
Jam Akin's picture

Good copy but you forgot Jim Morrison.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:46 | Link to Comment Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Not to mention Christopher Donner....

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 16:41 | Link to Comment bob_stl
bob_stl's picture

And Dennis Rodman...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:52 | Link to Comment azengrcat
azengrcat's picture

So what happens when NorKo accidently nukes itself and blames the US?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:08 | Link to Comment TuesdayBen
TuesdayBen's picture

Obama then passes the blame to Dubya.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:47 | Link to Comment Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Yeah - why didn't GW take out the Norks when he had the chance?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:14 | Link to Comment Sofa King Confused
Sofa King Confused's picture

Why would the Chinese be massing troops on the border with North Korea....it makes no sense.  Unless the real target is China and North Korea is being used as an excuse for bringing into the region missle systems and whatever else.  I personally think the region is being armed up for the Chinese aand maybe even the Russians.  Can't let the BRICS get off the petrodollar it would collapse the western world.

Maybe North Korean would even help with China and Russian for a couple boatloads of food and fuel.

Come on Kim Jung Un well throw in front row season tickets to the Lakers!

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 16:44 | Link to Comment bob_stl
bob_stl's picture

"Why would the Chinese be massing troops on the border with North Korea....it makes no sense."

 

To keep out the refugees.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:36 | Link to Comment dobermangang
Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:14 | Link to Comment Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

I support their cause with both hands...free the titties I say!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:35 | Link to Comment Matt
Matt's picture

Ignore the caption for #15, should read "topless chick uppercuts old douche".

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:39 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Silly peasant, there ARE NO accidents in history. If it happens, you can bet someone planned it.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:58 | Link to Comment Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

There are no accidents in politics

 

~ Theodore Parker~

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 23:04 | Link to Comment WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

"... there is only some purpose that we haven't yet understood."

-- D. Chopra

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:00 | Link to Comment ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

So what happens when NorKo accidently nukes itself and blames the US?

The market ends green, what else?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:51 | Link to Comment Jason T
Jason T's picture

this could get nuts to say the least..

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:02 | Link to Comment blabam
blabam's picture

Meanwhile in Japan...

 

"As recently an extreme japanese organization in Osaka mentioned during a protest to rape any Korean women in Japan, a Japanese middle-school girl does something shocking at a subway station in Tsruhashi."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oOW6QJfeoo&list=FLZRDvYlajS-Kj9OTTcIZeYA...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:18 | Link to Comment AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

talking about it while wearing short skirt and actually doing are totally different things.

 

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:56 | Link to Comment Matt
Matt's picture

Who knows, maybe she has a shot at being the leader of a right-wing nationalist extremist party. She already has the angry yelling part down.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:51 | Link to Comment SK8boarder
SK8boarder's picture

Talk about juggling chainsaws...  

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:53 | Link to Comment Fukushima Sam
Fukushima Sam's picture

Don't forget the fourth front, eating away like a cancer from the inside:

http://abcnews.go.com/International/wireStory/precarious-japan-nuke-plan...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:59 | Link to Comment FieldingMellish
FieldingMellish's picture

Lil' Kim's target?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:54 | Link to Comment Jason T
Jason T's picture

N. Korea is like the Snake in Aesops fable..

 

THE WASP AND THE SNAKE

A Wasp settled on the head of a Snake, and not only stung him several times, but clung obstinately to the head of his victim. Maddened with pain the Snake tried every means he could think of to get rid of the creature, but without success. At last he became desperate, and crying, "Kill you I will, even at the cost of my own life," he laid his head with the Wasp on it under the wheel of a passing waggon, and they both perished together."

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:11 | Link to Comment freeasabee1
freeasabee1's picture

MAD only works if no one goes mad, know what I mean.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:27 | Link to Comment akak
akak's picture

Now, if we could only figure out some way to make wasps selectively target bankers and politicians ....

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:52 | Link to Comment Burt Gummer
Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:56 | Link to Comment Jeremy Roenick
Jeremy Roenick's picture

I'm turning Japanese, I really think so...

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEmJ-VWPDM4

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:55 | Link to Comment Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

I stand by my prediction that any missile launched by NK ends up in Shanghai's water supply.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:24 | Link to Comment kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Three rivers dam.

      Murphy's Law.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:10 | Link to Comment ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

No wonder they are building ghost cities.  Mass migrations.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:50 | Link to Comment Jam Akin
Jam Akin's picture

If it did end up there who would know the difference?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:58 | Link to Comment Matt
Matt's picture

The water would suddenly become alot clearer.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 13:58 | Link to Comment MILESCFA
MILESCFA's picture

"Though there is a silver lining, since if a broken window creates a Keynesian utopia, just think of the GDP-boosting greatness of a nuclear explosion in the heart of Roppongi."

 

You're sick... LOL

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:00 | Link to Comment dobermangang
Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:54 | Link to Comment Spastica Rex
Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:02 | Link to Comment Bryan
Bryan's picture

LOL -- "if Kim Jong Un decides to launch a missile,..." then we will just... just.... ooooh... that will just make us MAD.  Kerry, what a clown.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:40 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Just wait until he climbs back into his swiftboat with Jane Fonda by his side.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:50 | Link to Comment Jam Akin
Jam Akin's picture

The ketchup is gonna flow, baby.  Big time!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:03 | Link to Comment Smiley
Smiley's picture

Look out, we might even have the UN send a stongly worded letter!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:05 | Link to Comment Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

    Therein lies the beauty of nuclear weapons.(lack of accuracy)   John [Herman Munster] Kerry would be laughable if there weren't so much at stake.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:05 | Link to Comment trebuchet
trebuchet's picture

That  Dept of intelligence report  reminds me of the "WMD" report .. we believe with moderate certainty, that N Korea now has the capability  of puting a nuclear warheard on a ballistic missile....      

 

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:30 | Link to Comment GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Very convenient timing, if you ask me. Obama wants to look warlike - supposedly good for poll numbers - and the Chinese tell him to attack N. Korea if N. Korea vaporizes Tokyo. With Tokyo gone the Japanese will not be able to retain their control of the Senkaku islands. China wins. Obama wins. If Kerry is in Tokyo at the time, he doesn't win but maybe Teresa does.

I'd wonder alound if I've lost touch with reality, but then DHS wouldn't allow me to buy any guns because I suffer from anxiety or some such thing. As if they didn't cause it. 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:09 | Link to Comment grgy
grgy's picture

There will be no nuclear missiles leaving North Korea.  What a total distraction.  The global financial melt down is real however.  The US could very easily start something foolish beyond John Kerry's rhetoric.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:43 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Foolish? I think that not only is WWIII serious business, but it's inevitable.

Otherwise, banksters will have to face the music someday. They'll destroy every last musical instrument before they'll allow that to happen.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:10 | Link to Comment pragmatic hobo
pragmatic hobo's picture

This whole thing probably started with North Korea trying to test the new regime in both South Korea and China. In the past the threats resulted in boat load of foreign aid for the North. However things seems to getting a little out of control for the North. If their heightened threat results in zero foreign aid, and possibly rebuke from China, it is possible it might cause some dissent among the ranks. Could this possibly lead to a coup in the North? It seem more and more likely, one way or another, Kim Jong Un won't repeat the longevity of his predecessors.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:22 | Link to Comment css1971
css1971's picture

I'm pretty sure all this bullshit from NK is an attempt to forestall a coup.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:32 | Link to Comment GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Even assuming Un and his supporters could be removed without incident, what would happen next? Would China allow reunification of North and South Korea? Would the south even want to merge with the north? Consider the difficulties merging the Germanies. 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:45 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Given that this shit is ALL fake (read: contrived), your questions are meaningless.

It's kind of like arguing over who the "best" professional wrestler is, when everyone knows it is merely a show provided for our entertainment.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:18 | Link to Comment Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

They sure are jinning up the war rhetoric. I'ts almost as if TPTB need some sort of distraction.

 

The thought of Kerry weighing in on an intelligence report almost made me fall out of my seat laughing.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:25 | Link to Comment trebuchet
trebuchet's picture

They stiched up a deal re Syria & N korea at the G8

 

Ruskies ( now theres a word from the the COLD war)  had already agreed a few months ago that Bashar is History... now they have a new agreement... 

 

West plays bad cop, russia plays good cop, invites them to nuclear disarmament talks...   China is Silent so Lil' Un doesnt know which way to turn.. are they playing him, are they not?

 

The Plan:  when Lil' Un very unsure about next move, China pulls the rug re oil, food, he has to come to heel completely or send one off... US plan: stop as much of the ensuing artillery rain into Seoul, take out as many ground/missiles, China moves in on ground  and Lil Un game over

 

Russia gets the exploration rights.............. in return for staying ALL the way out of Syria

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 17:29 | Link to Comment Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

Russia doesn't need exploration rights on the Korean peninsula, they have a fuck-ton of beachfront property in the neighborhood, not so much on the Syria side though...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:07 | Link to Comment NYMom
NYMom's picture

" I have a plan..." It is beyond comprehension that Kerry is Secretary of State.

"I have a plan" is a common line from John Kerry. Anybody can formulate a plan of action. The trick is getting that plan to work. To do so, a president will have to win over congress to get what they want achieved. Despite his statement to the contrary, records indicate John Kerry has written only 5 bills that actually were signed into law over a 20 year Senate career. That is an average of 1 bill every 4 years. His ability to win over his colleagues in congress is questionable at best. ". By Joseph Boudreau
Oct. 15, 2004 http://www.useless-knowledge.com/articles/apr/oct243.html

NYMom is just thrilled to have a skilled, tactitician at the helm to diffuse the possibility of global nuclear annihilation. Pheeew!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:12 | Link to Comment TumblingDice
TumblingDice's picture

Just leave Roppongi out of this damnit!

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:14 | Link to Comment SoNH80
SoNH80's picture

Would this Korean War have a laugh track and cuddly characters like "Radar" O'Reilly, "Hot Lips" Houlihan, "Hawkeye" Pierce and Lt. Col. Henry Blake in starring roles?

Where's Jimmy Carter?  Is his "Free Residual Oil and Hot Wings Special" plane warming up on the tarmac yet?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:15 | Link to Comment HD
HD's picture

If North Korea was actually going to do this - they would get the biggest bang for the buck as an EMP attack.

If properly executed an EMP attack would damage a large area, cost a fortune to recover from, kill no one and would not does require pin-point accuracy.

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:38 | Link to Comment GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Americans would never know what hit them if NoKo caused an EMP that knocked out the Internet. Obama would declare martial law instantly and ban all forms of opposition, and without the internet average Americans would be clueless and defenseless. Freedom would be gone before anyone knew it.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:45 | Link to Comment HD
HD's picture

"without the internet average Americans would be clueless and defenseless."

 Hard to argue against that.  Of course, clueless and defenseless isn't too far from where most people are right now anyway.

 

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:14 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

You mean if NoKo was blamed for an EMP.

Which, unless he was directly handed a device by some intel agency, is about as plausible as some Saudi guy in a cave carrying out 9/11 by having the military stand-down as the plane headed to the Pentagon.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 19:45 | Link to Comment rhinoblitzing
rhinoblitzing's picture

Could always blame it on a solar flare or meteor...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:18 | Link to Comment LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Am I the ony one that views "hitting Tokyo" as redundant after the Fukushima?

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:19 | Link to Comment Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

If you are going to attack somebody...you don't fucking tell them nuclear war is unavoidable and you're goint attack.....you just fucking strike. This is a bunch of hype to get the sheeple in line.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:34 | Link to Comment blabam
blabam's picture

"Mr. Dascombe, what we need is a clear message to the people of the country! This message should be read in every newspaper, heard on every radio, seen on every television. This message must resound throughout the ENTIRE INTERLINK! I want this country to realize that we stand on the edge of oblivion! I want every man, woman, and child to understand how close we are to chaos! I WANT EVERYONE to remember WHY THEY NEED US!"

Comes to mind.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:02 | Link to Comment Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

North Korea might know that we expect them to behave that way and they're just "messing" with us.

A CLEVER nation...

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:21 | Link to Comment Cheeseus Sonofdog
Cheeseus Sonofdog's picture

In the end who gets Japan? It seems they will lose their sovereignty using their own financial bombs. I'm guessing they become a territory of the United States.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 19:44 | Link to Comment rhinoblitzing
rhinoblitzing's picture

Never mind....

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:22 | Link to Comment css1971
css1971's picture

I'm not sure fighting North Korea will be describable as as "war".

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:23 | Link to Comment spinone
spinone's picture

We already bombed them twice.  Get original, Kim Jung Whatever

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:23 | Link to Comment Rustysilver
Rustysilver's picture

The problem is what is Japan / US to do. If NK launches any kind of missile towards Japan, do  you wait or do you shoot it down.

I you don't do anything than it would be seen by NK as weakness.

In my former life I was a satellite engineer, mostly payload (all US military). If you launch 100 rockets and 85 of them reach an orbit than your

are very successful  (engineering / mathematically speaking). It was calculated (a priori) that 1 of 34th shuttle would explode. Experience shown that to

be an accurate estimate.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 14:31 | Link to Comment ptoemmes
ptoemmes's picture

Heaven forbid N Korea considers a conventional attack on Fukushima. Who needs a nuclear tipped missile.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:17 | Link to Comment NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

You could finish off Fukushima with a trebuchet at this point.

Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:33 | Link to Comment ptoemmes
Fri, 04/12/2013 - 15:44 | Link to Comment Rustysilver
Rustysilver's picture

NotApplicable,

I gave you an up arrow for knowing what trebuchet is.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!