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Reuters Releases George Soros Obituary By Mistake: "Enigmatic Financier, Liberal Philanthropist Dies At XX"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Update - that didn't take long:

Reuters erroneously published an advance obituary of financier and philanthropist George Soros. A spokesman for Soros said that the New York-based financier is alive and well. Reuters regrets the error.

* * *

First CNN, then AP, now Reuters: the entire media is increasingly starting to look like amateur hour. Unless, of course, Soros is like Osama, and had several "reincarnated" body doubles, with the original specimen long gone.

Here is our suggestion for another prepared article: "Today after XX centuries of monetizing debt, the Emperor of the Galactic Central Bank, Gaius Maximus Printius Bernankius the DCLXVIth, ended QE in the year of the alien invasion, XXXXX. Bread costs XXXXXXXXXXX."

Just out from Reuters, an article which will certainly be withdrawn in milliseconds. Intern heads will roll for this, although it would be truly "New Normal" if Soros were to have a heart attack upon reading news of his own death, and die from it.

George Soros, enigmatic financier, liberal philanthropist dies at XX
5:41pm EDT

By Todd Eastham

WASHINGTON, XXX (Reuters) - George Soros, who died XXX at age XXX, was a predatory and hugely successful financier and investor, who argued paradoxically for years against the same sort of free-wheeling capitalism that made him billions.

He was known as "the man who broke the Bank of England" for selling short the British pound in 1992 and helping force the United Kingdom to withdraw from the European Exchange Rate Mechanism, which devalued the pound and earned Soros more than $1 billion.

And his Soros Fund Management was widely blamed for helping trigger the Asian financial crisis of 1997, by selling short the Thai baht and Malaysian ringgit.

"Subsequently, Prime Minister Mahatir of Malaysia accused me of causing the crisis, a wholly unfounded accusation," Soros wrote in The Crisis of Global Capitalism: Open Society Endangered," in 1998.

"We were not sellers of the currency during or several months before the crisis; on the contrary ... we were purchasing ringgits to realize profits on our earlier speculation."

Still, economist Paul Krugman, was one of many observers who accused Soros of helping trigger the crisis.

In 1999, Krugman wrote that "nobody who has read a business magazine in the last few years can be unaware that these days there really are investors who not only move money in anticipation of a currency crisis, but actually do their best to trigger that crisis for fund and profit."

Still, Soros has written extensively on the folly of what he has called free market "fundamentalism," the belief of many conservative economists that markets will correct themselves with no need for government intervention.

In Soros' view, markets and investors are subject to "mood" swings, or a prevailing positive or negative bias which can be exploited by savvy investors but which inevitably lead to damaging market bubbles and boom/bust cycles.

An enigma, wrapped in intellect, contradiction and money.

A Jew born in Hungary as the Nazis were gaining power in Germany, Soros survived World War Two and then emigrated to Great Britain, where he earned a degree from the London School of Economics in 1952, and landed his first job in the financial industry largely through pure stubborn chutzpah.

OPEN SOCIETY INSTITUTE

While at the London School, Soros studied under the economist and philosopher Karl Popper and a main vehicle for his philanthropy, the Open Society Institute, is named for Popper's two-volume work, "The Open Society and Its Enemies."

In that work, Popper develops the philosophy of reflexivity, a theory first articulated by William Thomas in the 1920s that posits that individual biases enter into market transactions, coloring the perception of economic fundamentals. Soros has attributed his own financial success in part to his understanding of the reflexive effect.

Key to understanding that effect is recognizing when markets are in a condition of near-equilibrium, or in disequilibrium. Soros has observed that when markets are rising or falling rapidly, they are typically marked by rising disequilibrium, and the dispassionate investor can capitalize on that recognition.

While Soros has benefited enormously from this understanding (Forbes put his wealth in 2013 at $19 billion, making him the world's 30th richest person, not counting the roughly $8 billion he has given away through various charitable entities he controls), he has argued nevertheless for strong central government regulation to correct for and counterbalance the excesses of greed, fear and the free market.

Popper's idea of fallibilism, which posits that anything one believes may in fact be wrong, is another key principle that has guided Soros in his career, and his philanthropy.

Soros' philanthropy since the 1970s, when he began funding the studies of black students at the University of Cape Town in South Africa, has been marked as much by his personal journey as by the needs of the communities he has set out to serve.

His efforts through the Open Society Institute and the Soros Foundations have been skewed toward the effort to promote democratic values in the post-Soviet economies of Central and Eastern Europe, where he witnessed the rise of communism in Hungary after World War Two.

"The bulk of his enormous winnings (as an investor and speculator) is now devoted to encouraging transitional and emerging nations to become 'open societies,'" former Federal Reserve Chairman Paul Volcker wrote in the foreword to Soros' "The Alchemy of Finance" (2003).

"Open," Volcker wrote, "not only in the sense of freedom of commerce but - more important - tolerant of new ideas and different modes of thinking and behavior."

PHILANTHROPY, POLITICS

Soros also pledged $50 million in 2006 to the Millennium Promise, led by economist Jeffrey Sachs, to provide educational, agricultural and medical aid to help poor villages in Africa. And the Open Society Institute has expanded its giving to more than 60 countries around the world, giving away roughly $600 million a year.

Soros was an early supporter of the peaceful transformation of the Solidarity movement in Poland and Open Society Institute programs were considered by many Western observers to be a key factor in the success of the "Rose Revolution" in Georgia.

While his philanthropy has earned him friends around the world, his political giving has earned him both friends and enemies. Former President George W. Bush, who Soros blamed for turning the United States into "the main obstacle to a stable and just world order," was perhaps the biggest single target of his political wrath.

"By declaring a 'war on terror' after Sept. 11, we set the wrong agenda for the world," Soros told Newsweek magazine in a 2006 interview. "When you wage war, you inevitably create innocent victims."

In a bid to stop Bush's re-election, Soros donated $23.5 million to more than 500 liberal and progressive groups during the 2003-2004 U.S. election cycle.

Other causes that have attracted Soros' generosity include drug policy reform. He donated $1.4 million to promote California's Proposition 5 in 2008, a failed initiative that would have expanded drug rehabilitation programs as alternatives to prison for non-violent drug offenders, and $400,000 to the successful 2008 Massachusetts initiative to decriminalize possession of less than an ounce (28 grams) of marijuana.

He has also been a vocal supporter of the right to die in dignity, revealing in 1994 that he had offered to help his own mother, a member of the Hemlock Society, commit suicide.

While Soros' life has been marked by remarkable success in his far-flung endeavors, it has not been without defeat. His investment in France's Societe Generale following Jacques Chirac's aggressive program of privatization led to charges of insider trading, which he disputed, and eventual conviction and the payment of a small penalty.

And he was a minority partner in a group that failed to acquire the Washington Nationals Major League baseball team.

But these failings stand out in the life of this remarkably successful Hungarian-American financier, philanthropist and thinker, in contrast to his stubborn refusal to fail in virtually every other venture.

 

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Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:03 | 3468469 RacerX
RacerX's picture

Where do I send the flowers?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:05 | 3468488 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

I still can't get over the loss, now that Cher is dead.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:08 | 3468503 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

This is weird since I just made a joke on another thread about Abe Vigoda being dead.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:11 | 3468522 notbot
notbot's picture

Tyler - can you please publish this same thing, only for Krugman?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:14 | 3468536 ZH11
ZH11's picture

I second this motion.

We need a modern spin of J G Ballard's Now:Zero for all our financial enrichment! 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:40 | 3468679 FL_Conservative
FL_Conservative's picture

Weekend at Soros'.  Glenn Beck can play the Andrew McCarthy role.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:46 | 3468708 Cheesy Bastard
Cheesy Bastard's picture

I won't believe it until I see it on Family Guy 3 weeks ago.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:59 | 3469232 eatthebanksters
eatthebanksters's picture

It's just too bad it was a mistake...

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:06 | 3469254 bania
bania's picture

"although it would be truly "New Normal" if Soros were to have a heart attack upon reading news of his own death, and die from it"

No Tyler, that would be called "Christmas".

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 07:07 | 3470488 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

You really know somebody's not liked much when he's not even dead yet and ZH's already celebrating.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:46 | 3468710 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

He died at 'XX'?

Too much Mexican Beer?

[Dos Equis?]

 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:01 | 3468768 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

George Schwartz, alias "Soros".  From teenage Jew Nazi-collaborator in 1944 Hungary to contemporary Jew-communist billionaire speculator. If the good die young, Schwartz-Soros will live forever. 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:19 | 3468849 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

Can we have Soros retracted instead of the obit?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:35 | 3468880 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

future dictionary entry:

 

Soros (soroz):: see: sociopath

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:19 | 3468846 1C3-N1N3
1C3-N1N3's picture

XX = base 34 for ... um ... (33*1) + (33*34) = 33 + 1122 = 1155

I expect him to make it about that long.

(Lots of repeating digits there.)

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:11 | 3468526 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Funny and I just mentioned Soros yesterday "oligarchs like Soros and Buffett who are actually over 200 years old but they use a serum of liquid gold and the blood of unborn peasants to sustain their lives."

He is the undead!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:15 | 3468543 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

When Vigoda does pass, nobody will believe it!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:56 | 3468961 The_Dude
The_Dude's picture

On a long enough timeline.....thank goodness!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:57 | 3469218 SILVERGEDDON
SILVERGEDDON's picture

Soros has been dead for decades. He was stuffed and mounted same time they did Roy Roger's horse, Trigger. dale Evans had them standing on either side of her fireplace in the 'ole homestead.

The guy you see in media appearances is the Elmo guy in a Soros puppet.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:05 | 3468490 Rahm
Rahm's picture

Cry me a fucking river

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:42 | 3468681 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

One day my friends, one day, your wish will become true, after all he is in his 80's!  This evildoer will answer for his greed and bloodlust!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:29 | 3469096 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Whenever he croaks I'll make a special trip to piss on his grave.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:02 | 3469239 Ned Zeppelin
Ned Zeppelin's picture

Saving that for Cheney

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:21 | 3469319 kliguy38
kliguy38's picture

While you're pissing on it don't step in that king-sized pile of steamin' shit I left on it.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:10 | 3469267 reTARD
reTARD's picture

I'm coming with you. Don't worry I'm not gay. We'll piss on opposite sides of his tombstone, LOL.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:20 | 3469315 Hulk
Hulk's picture

Just don't cross the streams. This one has real consequences...

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 22:02 | 3469440 reTARD
reTARD's picture

Is that what they mean when we've made a "death cross" crossover?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:11 | 3469274 GoldForCash
GoldForCash's picture

Made his first million pulling the gold from dead Jewish prisoners Teeth ...true I heard...

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 02:11 | 3470122 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

As a young boy I learned about opportunity....

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 09:49 | 3469353 HungryPorkChop
HungryPorkChop's picture

If you make Billion$ from other peoples demise, breaking currencies and keeping people in poverty........not good!!! 

 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:04 | 3468478 ZH11
ZH11's picture

Like he can die! Billionaires are immortal for the benefit of the trickle down effect.

Without them, we'd all be poor!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:22 | 3468588 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

We're led to believe they can't die, but the title of the article clearly states that Soros will die at "XX," which, as we all know, is the secret name of the club in Transylvania where the world elite gather to roast babies and go on puppy hunts.

There is hope.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:05 | 3468479 Cursive
Cursive's picture

This is truly laugh out loud funny.  Thank you, Thomson-Reuters, you've made my day.  BTW, Thomson publishes all kinds of tax guides which are probably riddled with as many errors....

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:51 | 3468727 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

"Tragedy today as former President Gerald Ford was eaten by wolves;... he was delicious."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkhwiuRbOEE

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:06 | 3468487 Lost Wages
Lost Wages's picture

My George Soros obituary: "He spent half the day ruining people's lives and the other half of the day trying to make up for it by being a philathropist."

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:07 | 3468499 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

You're half right.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:10 | 3468518 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

I was watching BBC do a segment on his death while he was in the backround jumping up and down yelling "I'm still here!!!"

20 minutes later he fell down.

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 09:20 | 3471231 GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Soros should have quoted Samuel Clemens "This report of my death was an exaggeration."

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:13 | 3468511 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Bastiat correctly noted that philanthropy is but another con to ruin people's lives. So, you can shorten your obituary significantly.

http://bastiat.org/en/protectionism.html

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:05 | 3468492 VonManstein
VonManstein's picture

whoops he is a Marked man obviosuly.. story was ready to role..

error? what typed every letter by mistake..

some changes are coming

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:10 | 3468512 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

This means he'll be fingered as the Boston Bomber and die in a shootout.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:09 | 3468517 ZH11
ZH11's picture

I heard he went long(er) gold yesterday...........

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:07 | 3468496 jonjon831983
jonjon831983's picture

SAVED

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:06 | 3468498 Awakened Sheeple
Awakened Sheeple's picture

Lately he looks like a walking corpse, so their mistake is understandable.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:11 | 3468524 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Oh come on -- he didn't look a day over XX.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:07 | 3468502 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

He, like Buffet, will probably outlive us all.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:42 | 3468680 Spitzer
Spitzer's picture

Yep, just like all the Nazi's that the Mossad decided to leave alone. He should have been on the list.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:32 | 3469104 Esso
Esso's picture

Yeah, the bastard's like 375 now, he probably wont die 'til he's 666.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:08 | 3468504 Godspeed You-Se...
Godspeed You-Seuss Goose's picture

I usually prefer my circus in a tent. . .but this'll do. 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:08 | 3468508 jonjon831983
jonjon831983's picture

Roman numerals XXX = .... 300?  So, basically they're predicting in about 200 years he'll be dead.

 

He's got a young wife right?  Probably eats her youth to stay alive.  Time for a refill!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:12 | 3468530 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

XXX = 30

CCC = 300

just sayin'.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:16 | 3468556 jonjon831983
jonjon831983's picture

Thanks apparently, I unedumacated.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:10 | 3468514 Rustysilver
Rustysilver's picture

Fuuking Reuters: they this to me too.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:11 | 3468520 B2u
B2u's picture

I saw Elvis last week.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:17 | 3468521 Radical Marijuana
Radical Marijuana's picture

"... it would be truly "New Normal" if Soros were to have a heart attack upon reading of his own death, and die from it."

Indeed, what could have more macabre appropriateness for Soros, whose ideas are based so much upon "reflexivity?"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reflexivity_%28social_theory%29

Or, enter "Soros reflexivity" in a search engine to see that:

Reflexivity refers to circular relationships between cause and effect. A reflexive relationship is bidirectional with both the cause and the effect affecting one another in a situation that does not render both functions causes and effects. In sociology, reflexivity therefore comes to mean an act of self-reference where examination or action "bends back on", refers to, and affects the entity instigating the action or examination.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:14 | 3468537 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Video footage of the Soros "death" event:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sh8mNjeuyV4

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:15 | 3468546 BanksterSlayer
BanksterSlayer's picture

Christmas came early today.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:15 | 3468548 zendome
zendome's picture

Bah, the MSM has been an ongoing useless joke for years now.  Why expect anything else from them?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:16 | 3468552 dolph9
dolph9's picture

If you read the article Soros was a proponent of the "right to die in dignity."

Ok, Soros, prove it.  You've lived a wonderful life, have more money than anybody can dream of, and you know that just around the corner lies dementia and decline.  Offing yourself is a great way to go and would be a great symbolic act.

Do you think the greedy Jew has it in him?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:19 | 3468576 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

dwight shrute proved that 1 bullet could kill 3 people if fired from the right angle-so I nominate Soros,Buffet and Dimon

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:17 | 3468553 reTARD
reTARD's picture

Soros is about to "disappear" soon. I'd like to too.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:58 | 3468749 Captain Benny
Captain Benny's picture

Exactly.  Someone was tipped off for the next false flag and hit "Submit" on the publish article button a little too early.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:17 | 3468554 Madcow
Madcow's picture

The predator drones got the time zone wrong ?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:18 | 3468560 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

"predatory financier"- sounds like Pravda circa 1965

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:19 | 3468562 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Damn. How bout they do George H. W Bush next. I think that F'ker is due.

BitCoin Last price:$102.80

 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:18 | 3468568 NoWayJose
NoWayJose's picture

Looks like the HFT's are trying to 'Short Soros' and leaked yet another fake story to drive the algos... Only problem is they should have used 'covered shorts' - the ones covered by six feet of dirt!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:20 | 3468578 tardball
tardball's picture

666 people recommend this. Be the first of your friends.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:22 | 3468583 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

He get's paid every time someone Google's his name.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:28 | 3468862 oddjob
oddjob's picture

I promise never to google maggot.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:23 | 3468586 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

bitcoin is up 7% on the news.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:40 | 3468593 Mine Is Bigger
Mine Is Bigger's picture

Come on!  Everyone knows he died long time ago and came back as an undead!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:25 | 3468594 RSBriggs
RSBriggs's picture

Not that I care a rat's ass for George Soros, but If I were him I'd seriously be thinking about heading into my end-of-days bunker.  Why would they even have something like that on file, much less available to "accidentally" release?  Nothing about drowning in a bathtub?  Methinks Becky got a little ahead of herself...

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:31 | 3468639 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

SOP for all the well known or famous.Started after some hilariously funny obituarys's

were done on the fly in times gone by.

The presstitutes even run them by the pre deceased I've heard.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:23 | 3468597 Mongrel
Mongrel's picture

That sorry old son of a bitch has been dead for a long time--he just doesn't know it . . . yet.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:25 | 3468604 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Seriously the guy is a billionaire and he died at an XX club, not even splurging for XXX?  Cheap prick.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:29 | 3468607 Kiss My Iceland...
Kiss My Icelandic Ass's picture

Sigh. He was a man, take him for all in all. We shall not look upon his like .... oh ... Georgy ! What's good ! Just talking about you ....

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:25 | 3468611 whoopsing
whoopsing's picture

...And in other news, George Soros has stubbornly refused to fail at living...

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:06 | 3468794 toys for tits
toys for tits's picture

Another market he's cornered ... life.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:26 | 3468613 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

When it happens for real, I'm throwing a party. Fuck that backstabbing piece of crap who sold out his own people to the nazis death camps.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:26 | 3468615 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

You'd think they'd password protect those files or something.

Amateur hour indeed.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:28 | 3468626 bingo was his name
bingo was his name's picture

RIP Bret Michaels

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:28 | 3468629 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:30 | 3468632 blindman
blindman's picture

sorry, but tylers do comedy as well as they do finance
and markets, dangerous combination I say.
so the msm is now just a tool to trigger algo market
manipulation?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:31 | 3468644 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

"Unless, of course, Soros is like Osama, and had several "reincarnated" body doubles, with the original specimen long gone."

RAH did this ages ago in "Double Star"

- Ned

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:32 | 3468650 VyseLegendaire
VyseLegendaire's picture

Did anyone actually read the obituary? It sounds remarkably sarcastic and humorous, like it was written especially for ZH. 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:16 | 3468831 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

The humor was unintentional. Soros is a Rothschild cognate. Redschield controls Reuters. 

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:36 | 3468660 surf0766
surf0766's picture

Communist asshole !

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:40 | 3468675 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

What's going on? Gold price crashes, terrorist attacks in Boston, factory explodes near Waco .... and now this.  What is next?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:42 | 3468688 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

they meant undead. alien lizard sucubuses can't die because they aren't alive to begin with.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:44 | 3468690 Melin
Melin's picture

controlled demolition in 3...2...1...?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:43 | 3468698 The Gooch
The Gooch's picture

The Matrix is dead!

Long live the matrix!

Signed, The Glitch

Oops. Gooch.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:46 | 3468709 Edward Fiatski
Edward Fiatski's picture

RIP

Off to Heaven with you, George. :')

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:47 | 3468717 tony wilson
tony wilson's picture

'We've had such terrible speculative loss of life, maybe the smartest thing to do is pull it.'”

pull the obit.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:53 | 3468734 Edward Fiatski
Edward Fiatski's picture

Well, since Reuters is a Rothschild venue, I guess the assassin got stuck in traffic somewhere.

No bonus for him/her.

Think of a motive to actually do this, quick!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:48 | 3468720 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

From hard on to hard up in 2 seconds. Soon Soros, soon....

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:51 | 3468724 IamtheREALmario
IamtheREALmario's picture

Selling one's soul and being demonically possessed has its perqs. The demon can keep the body alive indefinitely, even after the soul has departed. Demon's are not big on maintenance mind you ... so if you see George looking a little ragged you wiull understand.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:10 | 3468814 toys for tits
toys for tits's picture

That demon definitely has a handyman special.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:58 | 3468750 Manipuflation
Manipuflation's picture

Perhaps Mr. Soros should take this faux pas as a hint.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 18:57 | 3468753 tuttisaluti
tuttisaluti's picture

I wouldn't miss him

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:06 | 3468791 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

This was an innocent mistake and demonstrates that some Fed employee has gotten a job at Reuters

NEW YORK (CNNMoney) -

Oops. The Federal Reserve accidentally emailed the minutes from its March meeting to 154 people a day early, and those people included employees at some of the world's largest banks.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:09 | 3468801 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

I guess someone isn't getting any points in their death pool betting pool now.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:10 | 3468806 koaj
koaj's picture

whichever one of you bitchez is @deadgeorgesoros

 

i love you

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:09 | 3468807 Bicycle Repairman
Bicycle Repairman's picture

Whoa, somebody has outlived their usefulness.  Not much call for a currency, society destabilizer about now.  I thought George got the memo on gold.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:21 | 3468848 Edward Fiatski
Edward Fiatski's picture

"Advance obituary", huh? This alleges, that Soros gave the publication authorisation to print it in the first place in case of death.

RESERVE YOUR LEGACY, NOW!! Only $14.99 a month!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:19 | 3468851 All Out Of Bubblegum
All Out Of Bubblegum's picture

Pfft. Vampires don't die unless extraordinary measures are taken.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:35 | 3468856 GoodMorningMr.V...
GoodMorningMr.VanRumpoy...'s picture

 

The media always like to use the buzz word “Philanthropist” when portraying him. Too bad this old shitbag doesn’t give a dime to charities but pumps all his money into lobbying and political  organizations like Center for American Progress, Moveon. org, think progress,  and the Institute for New Economic Thinking to push his and the Globalist agenda.

 

 

That being said, Soro's is old and in terrible health, He will probably go out to grass very soon. Prepare for a disgusting amount of gushing and lionizing of the globalist media's favorite globlist P.O.S.

They will probably gloss over the pending lawsuits against him for trying to choke out his girlfriend.

http://www.ice-news.net/2011/08/18/billionaire-soros-slaps-chokes-28-yea...

Or how he was a Nazi Collaborator that worked with the Nazis to  Seize the property of his fellow Jews and send them off to death camps

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:27 | 3468864 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

the alien invasion

They're probably pissed off because of the inflation Ben exported to their planet.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:30 | 3468867 Overfed
Overfed's picture

He's not dead? Fuck!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:30 | 3468868 Aurora Ex Machina
Aurora Ex Machina's picture

The last time this happened we got the Noble Prizes, so perhaps there's hope.

 

"George Soros International Currency Prize for Nation State Integration". 

 

 

 

Paid in Sterling.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:46 | 3468882 moonstears
moonstears's picture

Ironically this morning while shaving, not bullshitting here, I wondered "If Soros died today, would there be a demonic force lifted from the earth, like with the blue sky opening, and birds singing?" Then thought "Nah...I guess this evil force would immediately seek another wicked fucker to house it." edit: should have thought "demonic force sucked into the earth, with his soul"(George, you own every suicide and broken family due to your fiat follies, you shit bag)

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:35 | 3468885 Meat Hammer
Meat Hammer's picture

He has been kind of truthy lately.  Maybe he's about to get suicided.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:43 | 3468907 pauhana
pauhana's picture

Would it be entirely too barbaric to just go ahead and bury him alive?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 19:47 | 3468932 EclecticParrot
EclecticParrot's picture

"Rumors of my investment prowess have been greatly exaggerated"

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:01 | 3468986 Ned Zeppelin
Ned Zeppelin's picture

This was a warning to Soros from TPTB.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:10 | 3469009 Divine Wind
Divine Wind's picture

 

 

 

Probably scared the crap out of the guy.

Who knows if he is ailing from something.

Nerts to Reuters.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:13 | 3469020 tradewithdave
tradewithdave's picture

Accidents like this happen all the time... like that time Hank Paulson was testifying to congress and there was that May 6,2010 flash crash. Just an accident. Soros had nothing to worry about. By the way, who owns Reuters?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:20 | 3469063 PubliusTacitus
PubliusTacitus's picture

Hopefully, they'll be able to re-publish this very, very, very, very, very, very soon.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:50 | 3469182 Quantum Nucleonics
Quantum Nucleonics's picture

In other news, our new Alien Overlords have appointed one Ben Bernanke, a ghola of the original from Bene Tleilax, as Grand Moff of the new Earth subsidiary.

Sat, 04/20/2013 - 14:20 | 3477517 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

LOL! I could laugh myself by accident right into the slig pen over that one!

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 20:51 | 3469196 Village-idiot
Village-idiot's picture

Do you think he'll take the hint?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:05 | 3469252 Chippewa Partners
Chippewa Partners's picture

I don't know what number wife he is on but isn't the Palindrome still playing tennis?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:29 | 3469337 BuckShotJones
BuckShotJones's picture

Enigmatic Financier, Liberal Philanthropist Dies At XXX" or 666

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 21:47 | 3469397 Blano
Blano's picture

I'm sure this has come up before, but at the beginning of each year there needs to be a ZH Death Pool contest, pick 3 people and if you're right you win a prize.  Used to listen to a radio station that did that and it was rather entertaining I admit.  Someone even won one year.

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 23:05 | 3469746 Liberty2012
Liberty2012's picture

All of these errors lately - is someone sending smoke signals?

Thu, 04/18/2013 - 23:33 | 3469814 newengland
newengland's picture

Oh dear. Must be desperate.   Rothschild owned Reuters publishes an obit for Soros. 

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 01:20 | 3470054 squexx
squexx's picture

In any event, hopefully his death is slow and very painful. Soros deserves to suffer a bit before his evil existance comes to an end!

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 01:39 | 3470087 Oligarch
Oligarch's picture

Will he die from a stroke or a heart attack? I believe God takes out revenge at the evil ones in the end ... 

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 01:59 | 3470111 SqueekyFromm
SqueekyFromm's picture

I just wrote an Irish Poem over at Naked Capitalism that I hope you guys enjoy. It is kind of deep, in a Joycian way. .

A Bit Of Oh!

There once was a fellow named Soros,
Who died, but there wasn’t much pathos.
But wait! He ain’t dead!
Reuters screwed up, instead!
OMG! (Is the “o” long in “bathos”???)

Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 02:50 | 3470184 Hobbleknee
Hobbleknee's picture

The king is dead.  Long live the king.

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 04:45 | 3470274 mrdenis
mrdenis's picture

Did he run the Boston marathon too ?

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 05:06 | 3470291 rikoder
rikoder's picture

"Soros is like Osama, and had several "reincarnated" body doubles"

 

hahaha, I laughed so hard, few will catch the reference.

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 06:09 | 3470340 Byte Me
Byte Me's picture

Oh to be XX again....

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 06:34 | 3470378 jjsilver
jjsilver's picture

That was no mistake, that was a message from lord Rothschild

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 07:39 | 3470626 dehdhed
dehdhed's picture

They don't mention how he was supposed to die.
He probably has more gold than Cyprus.

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 07:41 | 3470631 harleyjohn45
harleyjohn45's picture

Too bad, but time is running out George.

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 10:40 | 3471734 Guinny_Ire
Guinny_Ire's picture

No mention of his learning the practice of the dark arts during his Nazi collaboration period. It is amateur hour!

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 10:39 | 3471736 Guinny_Ire
Guinny_Ire's picture

dubba wubba post

Fri, 04/19/2013 - 18:20 | 3474421 Random_Robert
Random_Robert's picture

The fact that a preapred Obit exists for Mr Soros actually gives me a soothing sense of tranquility that one day he actually will croak...

Part of me was starting to wonder if he actually WAS Darth Sidious.

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