This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Free Vegas Trips, Cocaine And Hookers: A Peek At Real Banker Life

Tyler Durden's picture


Think frontrunning clients, trading against recommendations, manipulating LIBOR, and slamming gold at the London fixing is all investment bankers do? Wrong. What really happens in banker life is far more exciting and enjoyable (at least for preferred banker clients) as the following story by the WSJ's David Enrich shows.

In reality, the activities that bankers seem to spend the most time on, is treating their "preferred clients" with free gambling trips to Las Vegas, skiing in Chamonix, flying wives and girlfriends in helicopters, doing blow in industrial amounts, and, of course, cavorting with strippers and hookers. All paid for by some unwitting clients of course. It is this environment of utter and perfectly permitted, if not encouraged, debauchery that allowed scandals such as the Libor fixing "conspiracy" (first theory, then fact of course), to flourish, and which makes being a banker still the most desired job in the world (contrary to beliefs that it was all about the passion of crunching goalseeked DCFs at 2 am in the morning).

A quick summary of what really goes on behind the glass doors:

And a more detailed one:

Neil Danziger's trades for Royal Bank of Scotland Group PLC generated rich commissions for the brokers who handled them. In return brokers at London's Tullett Prebon PLC took Mr. Danziger to London strip clubs and spent long weekends with him in Las Vegas... Brokers at R.P. Martin Holdings Ltd., another London firm, gave him early access to lucrative trades, these people say.
[B]rokers routinely reward valued traders by returning a percentage of their commissions in the form of entertainment. Brokers have paid for traders to spend weekends in the Alps and Saint-Tropez, and on occasion, have even bought them cocaine or prostitutes, according to people who witnessed such activity.
The London brokers and traders interviewed by the Journal estimated that roughly 5% of the brokerage commissions a trader generates often come back to the trader in the form of various perks. It isn't uncommon for a brokerage to spend $50,000 a year entertaining a single trader, they say.


While plenty of client entertainment takes place on Wall Street, traders and brokers say such activity is even more prevalent in London.


As recently as last summer, BGC Partners Inc., a New York-based brokerage, dispatched limousines to the homes of top traders at London banks. The limos ferried the traders' wives and girlfriends to a helicopter, which flew them to the Royal Ascot—a marquee event on London's social calendar—for a day of horse races, according to people familiar with the event.


ICAP has treated traders to ski weekends in Chamonix, France, according to a former bank trader who attended.


Several former brokers and bank traders said they witnessed brokers providing clients with cocaine or prostitutes.
Compliance departments at some brokerage firms cross-check brokers' entertainment expenses against a "banned list" that includes a database of major strip clubs.


Brokers take traders to strip clubs anyway, according to former traders and brokers. When taking traders to strip clubs, Tullett brokers sometimes paid cash out of their own pockets, according to one trader who participated. The trader said the brokers told him they expected to be reimbursed after submitting inflated expenses for taxis.


In a separate incident, after one broker took a trader to Las Vegas, the trader sent a batch of orders to a rival brokerage, prompting the broker to send an angry missive to the trader demanding to know why, according to a person who read the note.


In one of the few cases brought, the Financial Services Authority in 2010 banned from the industry a broker at Tradition Financial Services, Fabio De Biase, for showering a hedge-fund trader with approximately £131,000 ($200,000) worth of cash, gift vouchers and gold bullion in exchange for higher commissions. The agency said Mr. De Biase violated an FSA guideline that requires finance-industry professionals to "act with integrity."


While the FSA didn't take any enforcement action, police in London are now investigating whether brokers provided illegal kickbacks, these people say. "There aren't specific rules about whether you can send your clients to go see prostitutes," an FSA spokesman said. "You have to pick what sort of things you look at as a regulator." (Prostitution itself isn't illegal in the U.K., but soliciting a prostitute in public is.)

Why the lavish entertainment expenses that make working 20 hour days, enjoyable? (and the millions in comp, of course). Very simple - (s)quid pro quo of course.

One former ICAP derivatives broker says the morning after treating a trader to a night out, "there would be a line of trades for me. I didn't even have to ask."


The difficulty of proving a quid pro quo helps explain why British authorities seldom go after brokers for lavish entertaining, according to industry participants and lawyers.

And, of course:

U.S. and British authorities believe that brokers' eagerness to please trading clients played a key role in the Libor scandal.

Damn, it feels good to be a banskter...


- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:20 | 3522212 Kristian
Kristian's picture

So they are not only fucking their clients and taxpayers.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:23 | 3522230 Deo vindice
Deo vindice's picture

When men (or women) lose their moral compass, it doesn't just affect one aspect of their lives.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:24 | 3522235 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

These guys have a compass, but it only points to one kind of pole.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:28 | 3522265 TrumpXVI
TrumpXVI's picture

Yeah, and the needle is always "erect".

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:48 | 3522365 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

I agree, but posit Darwin takes way too long to correct natural inefficiencies.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:58 | 3522421 derek_vineyard
derek_vineyard's picture

the rich always control the poor

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:14 | 3522501 Surly Bear
Surly Bear's picture

Poor form! What happens in Vegas...stays in Vegas....

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:25 | 3522551 jbvtme
jbvtme's picture

can't wait for the banks to start accepting gold deposits...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:41 | 3522620 HobbyFarmer
HobbyFarmer's picture

This may come across as sour grapes, but it's as true as anything I've ever shared.  I wouldn't trade my life for any of theirs. 

I love my wife, love the boys I'm trying to raise into men, like my job, love my hobby growing and raising food and am as content as a man can probably be.  Or, at least as content/happy as I have ever been.

The bankers can take the bailouts, ski trips, blow, hookers, and whatever else they have. 

I woke up this morning and got to help a son with his 3 ducks he's raising for 4H after doing my own chores.  Tonight is "boys night" when my wife gets a couple hours off while the boys and I do chores and watch our one hour of tv per week (survivor--watch online since we don't own a tv) and talk about what we'd do if we were on the show.  Several evenings now, before bed, we've been laying out on the trampoline under a pile of blankets watching for shooting stars.  My boys beside me doing something we like to do...(cliche incoming!) priceless.  We've been improving our meadow by cleaning out rocks (to build a wall for our pigs) and the joy these boys get from working with me means the world to me.  God, I am a lucky man.

I'll keep my life and living it the way I am.

For what it's worth, I've got a brother in law who graduated from a top 5 mba program and is a banker with the ambition and work ethic to do anything....his goal?  Work for Goldman Sachs.  He laughs at me when I mention enjoy shoveling manure and working early/late hours + weekends to get my small farm up and running.  The sad thing? when his family comes to visit, the children sob when it's time to leave. 

My country home provides my family a paradise his riches will never earn. I honestly don't envy him the income he makes (with his bonus it's 4 times what I earn in a year).  I wonder if/when he will wonder what he gave up.  Because we're related, I hope it's sooner than later.

As for the rest of the bankers, I don't give a damn about them. 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:52 | 3522684 jumbo maverick
jumbo maverick's picture

You should not have written that. You have just jumped to the top of the drone list.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:16 | 3522785 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

The real smart bankers or any professional out there leave the game once they hit their number. Even Dave chapelle faced same decisions on to make more money making fun of his own race or quit with enough to survive. He chose a farm in Ohio.

More flash= more self delusion

After 3 million in assets (~100k/ year residual income)your time becomes more valuable.

If you don't set a limit for yourself, you are going to end up divorced and having your assistant buy and deliver birthday gifts for your children in boarding school

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:24 | 3522809 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

If anyone had any pings of envy over these guys, don't.

Galatians 6:7

I am Chumbawamba.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:30 | 3522826 redpill
redpill's picture

Fuck Royal Ascot anyway, I'd rather go to Del Mar.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:15 | 3523014 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Where the 'SERFS' meet the turf...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:44 | 3523139 SamAdams
SamAdams's picture

Paid cash at strip clubs and later "they expected to be reimbursed after submitting inflated expenses for taxis".   Either that is one very expensive taxi, or one very desperate stripper.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:33 | 3522833 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

I'd leave the bankrupt system sooner than later.  Like Bill Gross, we'll all be getting grossly desperate very soon, when they come for your money/401k.

Ron Paul + Jim Rogers on the government: "They'll use force and they'll use intimidation..."

Here's a video clip with Ron + Jim, from the Sovereign Man Offshore Workshop, at Hotel W, Santiago, Chile, a month ago:


Ooops, did I front-run a future posting?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:35 | 3522836 Manthong
Manthong's picture

James T, yeah you did

HF..  good stuff..

if you care to divulge.. what neck of the woods?

I am shopping for new neighbors.  state/county is close enough 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:44 | 3522885 HobbyFarmer
HobbyFarmer's picture

Sheboygan county Wisconsin.  Good people, surrounded by farms, men and women who know how to work and know  how to produce.  this is one of the necks of the woods that will rebuild America when the time comes.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:20 | 3523023 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

I hope you have a decent tractor... I've been clearing out rocks from the meadow for the past 4 years now [about 50 sq, ft at a time] with a mattock & my back... Last 2 days has been biting gnat parade city... I just keep thinking about 'Cool Hand Luke' while I work...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:41 | 3523125 Manthong
Manthong's picture

good cheese and a nifty airshow up there, too.

and I’ve heard there was a football team somewhere in the vicinity.


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 15:04 | 3523493 aragornsos
aragornsos's picture

Nice.  I'm just a little to your south in Illinois ;)  But we have space up in Wisconsin that will do quite nicely "when the time comes".  Back up plans and all of that...


Grew up and learned the basics of farming from my dad back in Massachusetts, and helping the old man down the road who paid us like $1 a bushel for picking green beans, corn and such.  Fun times.  Learned to value money, learned to value what you get then you have to expend actual LABOR to produce something.  At least I know enough to be able to produce when we get to that point (wish I had enough now to drop out and off the grid and start the producing now, but have to live in reality with a family that's still pretty much all just sheep, unfortunately.)

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:07 | 3522974 zerozulu
zerozulu's picture

I heard in the news that a granny wants to move to Idaho!

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:50 | 3522921 Hopeless for Change
Hopeless for Change's picture

Isn't it sad that jumbo maverick's comment is a joke that we all get?  This man is celebrating his independence and we all know that this will anger the government, who relies so heavily upon dependants that they are feverishly creating millions more. 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:03 | 3522739 BostonBill99
BostonBill99's picture

I know many on here will give you crap about what you wrote, but for me, I say Bravo, HobbyFarmer, Bravo!!

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:10 | 3522766 Goldbugger
Goldbugger's picture

When the Trillions in derivatives explode your brother in law will come a knockin.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:58 | 3522942 HobbyFarmer
HobbyFarmer's picture

He and his family will be accepted with open arms.  Family first.  We all make bad choices.  And his choices aren't all bad.....any more than mine are all good.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:23 | 3522802 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

God Bless you, brother.

Observe: here is a man that has discovered the secret of life.

I am Chumbawamba.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:42 | 3522624 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

God's Chosen People doing 'God's Work'...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:24 | 3523051 Thisson
Thisson's picture

Fuck off, Francis - you mean God's Chosen people such as Anshu Jain?  Jamie Dimon?  Come on, already - you're a one trick pony and it's very monotonous.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:29 | 3523076 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

prove him wrong that they don't hold alot of jobs in high finance in proportion to their 1.7% of US population. also O just appointed a few more to top spots- pritzker( who put his black ass in the WH) and some other yid.

Sat, 05/04/2013 - 01:01 | 3529595 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

My bank already does. They charge a fee in fractions of ounces per year to hold the bullion.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:31 | 3522828 1100-TACTICAL-12
1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

Man must abide by a moral code, God fearing or not. If a person is say over 25 or so there is no way to rationalize hookers and blow because in your gut you know it is not moral . Been there done it all the time knowing.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:59 | 3522949 dontgoforit
dontgoforit's picture

Me, too; but I've changed my ways - long time ago.  And it's not about the money, though it is tough to get on without it.

Sat, 05/04/2013 - 01:01 | 3529598 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

Oh? I believe in a free market and I believe the government has no say in what’s moral. So when it comes right down to it what’s IMMORAL about hookers if it’s all consenting? Sex is consenting, trading money/goods is consenting, generally apart we don’t all say those are bad things, so by what morality magic is the combination of the 2 suddenly immoral? Seriously, what is the logic?  As for blowcaine it’s natural from the environment just not purified like that. Then again, penicillin isn’t naturally purified either, nor is silver typically found at .9999 purity, yet we accept this. Why? What’s the logic in your morality? Or do you simply expect us all to take it on faith?  I don’t advocate hookers ‘n’ blow but the banksters bother me not for how they spend the money but for WHO’S MONEY THEY ARE SPENDING. It isn’t theirs, it’s taken by force, fraud & collusion. THAT is clearly immoral as it is NOT with consent.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:30 | 3522278 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Everyone has a compass...  sociopathy is INCREDIBLY rare.  The problem is that virtually no one has any integrity (degree of adherence to their moral compass).  Hence why the job requires a hookers and blow lifestyle...  it's just a natural coping mechanism.  Some might aspire to do such things, but that's typically a response by shallow people who have no choice in the matter. 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:49 | 3522371 Bobbyrib
Bobbyrib's picture

How rare can it be? Everyone in CONgress besides Ron Paul is a sociopath who is out for their own benefit and would not care if the whole country collapsed tomorrow as long as they were enriched. Unfortunately, I think sociopathy is not as rare as it should be. How the hell did we elect so many sociopaths in Congress, locally, and at the state level? How did we allow the President to appoint Bernanke, and allow the local Fed governors to control our lives economically?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:05 | 3522463 Nightblade
Nightblade's picture

To be successfully elected in a democracy, you have to be very skilled at controlling other people's minds (to make them want to vote for you).  The type of person who is best at that skill is a sociopath.  Thus, all politicians are sociopaths.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:27 | 3522562 Bobbyrib
Bobbyrib's picture

I do agree, but look at the network these sociopaths create once in office. The financial institutions and our elected officials are now working together to fuck every non 1%er out of their wealth. Troubling to say the least.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:07 | 3522755 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

People who are obsessed with power money fame will sacrifice family, ethics, even their own health and happiness to achieve them.

For best results in life seek out people who have balanced lifestyles. You never notice them but they are there.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:37 | 3522601 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

sociopathy is a medical diagnosis... I don't think most of the people you consider to be sociopaths would meet criteria...

You're getting "patently retarded", "obnoxiously self interested", and "high machiavellian aptitude" confused with "sociopath"...  The former "cares" but is incentivized not to...  the latter may not "care" at all (robot) and/or literally has a starved moral compass (not fully developed or incredibly skewed).  Big difference.  One is a complete human that is an asshole (or I think more likely in this case, completely ignorant), the other is something less than human and probably cannot ever regain that lost area.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:11 | 3522985 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

My immoral compass musts be broken, as I've experienced Vegas, Ascot, Wimbledon, Formula 1, etc.  But they all bore me to tears -- would not want to go back a 2nd time.  All hype and faux-status.  Would much rather do a Nature activity with good friends or family. 

Of course skiing in Chamonix, with French food & wine... hmmm, could be tempted, could be taken on a holiday.  [Monty Python skit: Holiday pictures, photographs, your wife - is she a 'goer'?, know what I mean, know what I mean?  Say no more!]  ;-)

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:26 | 3522251 SMG
SMG's picture

The bankers party, while 1 in 5 people can't afford to feed themselves, including millions of children.   

Where is justice, when will people become outraged by this?



Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:32 | 3522279 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

They party with their nasty tranny looking wives, stinky crotch infested hookers and meth laced cocaine so they can maliciously rob and starve people. 

OMG.  And Charlie Sheen was ostracized.  Spitzer was ostracized.  At least they can get pretty women.

Charlie Sheen -did his own partying with his OWN money.  Damm pissed dem bank welfare whoring "flowerchildren" off-jealousy is a b*, isn't it?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:49 | 3522370 roadhazard
roadhazard's picture

I want to be Charlie Sheen when I grow up.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:29 | 3522571 cifo
cifo's picture

I wanted to be Hugh Hefner.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:43 | 3522636 somecallmetimmah
somecallmetimmah's picture

Divorced, impotent, reviled and near death?


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:31 | 3523357 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

It's Gin and Tonic all the way to Cougartown! 

Be careful what you wish for.

Fri, 05/03/2013 - 16:03 | 3528291 cifo
cifo's picture

At 80+, he is surrounded by more beautiful women than all of us here will ever be.

But I should speak for myself :)

Sat, 05/04/2013 - 01:07 | 3529605 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:33 | 3523369 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

Dude, in Sheen's defense.... HE SPENT HIS OWN MONEY!

He EARNED his own money.  He was marketed correctibly.   Wall Street cannot market water to a fish. 

And he got pretty girls.  The rest- as far as I'm concerned is personal and none of my business. 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:48 | 3522661 The Proletariat
The Proletariat's picture


Uh....this type of behavior has been going on since at least surprise. nothing to see here, move along.

There is a "fictional" book called Ghost of Manhattan that is eerily similar to this story...except its almost 300 pages worth of "immoral" behavior.




Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:58 | 3522691 Widowmaker
Widowmaker's picture

Justice is just another nigger in an expensive suit.

Do you want fries with that?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:55 | 3522705 venturen
venturen's picture

The liberals sell, the we are protecting the people...While Obama and the democrats in congress party with Wall Street getting thieving rich. Look at the packages of Rahm or Lew or Obamas other chief of staff from Jp Morgan. Obama just hired another Citibankster for his cabinet. The media will protect the democrats with their no truth be exposed. Free press is dead. Just have to wait for the coffers to empty or the printers to break. The system as it stands has 5-10 years before it sinks in an ocean of unpayable debt.  

Sat, 05/04/2013 - 01:04 | 3529600 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

That outrage was called Occupy Wall Street. They’re still at it but many in the public ignored them, hoping they wouldn’t be shoved into their ranks by the elite thieves. Good luck with that.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:41 | 3522337 SmackDaddy
SmackDaddy's picture

I dont see anything immoral about these behaviors.  Just with how they earned the money to do it.....

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:43 | 3522633 Popo
Popo's picture

Agreed. Major prudishness around here.

Something wrong with strippers? WTF?

Even feminists believe a woman can do what she wants with her own body. When did the Christians take over ZH? Scary.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:46 | 3522649 somecallmetimmah
somecallmetimmah's picture

Nice.  How, O-unbiased one, did you conclude that nasty christians are behind that sentiment?

Maybe your muslim buddies ready to slit everyone's throats?  Gloria Steinem & her thugs?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:20 | 3523264 RealeyesRealize
RealeyesRealize's picture

Well, I myself am a banker.

I cannot disclose my position within the bank I work for either..

Tis a fast life though.  I am not sure how long I can keep going at this rate.  Only 26 but been doing the corporate thing since 17(intern)...


On a side note, I am a day trader, have been for almost 5 years now.  Any active or real trader knows it's very stressful.  Relaxing and unwinding takes alot of partying sometimes.  Luckily for me, I rent my house to 2 other friends from college whom have sisters in sororities, so the parties are awesome and it's crazy at times.  I woke up one Tuesday on the floor of Caesar's Palace suite in AC one time.  Was using bathroom towels as pillows and there were 8 other people in the room, only 4 of which I knew.  I don't even know whose suite it was.  The other half of my party was who knows where.  I also had to be at work 1.5 hours away in 2 hours for a presentation I was leading.  Later found out a few of them got kicked out of multiple casinos...

Good times..

Seriously I forget where I am sometimes. 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:29 | 3523349 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

Boooring!  You sound like a dud.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:10 | 3522765 noless
noless's picture

Modern feminism typically employs the inverted hierarchy as their model of social justice..

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:28 | 3522808 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

Feminists are like bankers
Unhappy fools seeking happiness through work

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:29 | 3523342 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

"Something wrong with strippers? WTF?"

YES.  They're fat, gross, fake... some of them aren't even women.

Attraction is perfectly natural and healthy.  But *YUCKO*.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 17:30 | 3524113 Popo
Popo's picture

You're going to the wrong clubs.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:50 | 3522377 N57Mike
N57Mike's picture

Without morals it's all over folks... ""Then tell them, 'This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says: Drink, get drunk and vomit, and fall to rise no more because of the sword I will send among you.'" Jeremiah 25:27

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:20 | 3522534 dark_matter
dark_matter's picture

"And your covenant with death shall be disannulled, and your agreement with hell shall not stand; when the overflowing scourge shall pass through, then ye shall be trodden down by it." Isaiah 28:18

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:55 | 3522706 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

I don't vomit, so I'm in the clear...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:26 | 3522253 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture





Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:35 | 3522311 phalfa5
phalfa5's picture

ahh, the good old days.  gone but not forgotten, thanks to the herpes.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:36 | 3522597 Popo
Popo's picture

It never ceases to amaze me that some of the largely libertarian readership of ZH takes issue with prostitution and with strip clubs. Let consenting adults do whatever they want behind closed doors.

Fuck bankers. But thank god for strippers!

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:01 | 3522735 harami
harami's picture

Because exploiting women is just good business?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 17:34 | 3524131 Popo
Popo's picture

When the girls are walking home with $2500 a night, I'm not sure it's the women that are being exploited.  

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:21 | 3522219 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

At least this is one example of trickle down economics actually working.  The strippers and drug dealers are just fine with this.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:29 | 3522269 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

the clients insist their strippers are fine 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:21 | 3522220 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Just flood Wall Street with blow laced with Polonium 210. That will put them assholes on notice real quickly when a few of the more egregious alphas start dying off after hookers and blow binges.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:54 | 3522407 Unprepared
Unprepared's picture

I think Polonium is illegal and expensive. I'm okay with mixing the dough with some chemical markers.


<looking into a live satellite feed in the middle of the night> "Look, all those dots glowing in the dark are crooked banksters"

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:58 | 3522422 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

'I think Polonium is illegal and expensive'. Understatement of the year......... Like blow isn't. I laughed hard reading that you got an up arrow from me for that.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:22 | 3522221 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

Give me a million of your cash.


I'll lose it all (by extracting most of it in management fees) and in return, you can have this plush $20,000 family trip.


What a profitable business to be in.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:04 | 3522742 Acet
Acet's picture

Ah, but you see, the immoral bit here is that it's not their money they're loosing:

- The people being getting hookers and blow are getting them for what they do with the money they manage for others.


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:28 | 3522223 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Sounds like your typical (top tier) national (financial, pharma, auto, insurance and various other widget) sales conference if one is to be perfectly honest.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:28 | 3522260 centerline
centerline's picture

+1.  Reality is though that honest work has been usurped by finance at every level at this point.  "Business folks" drive critical decision making as opposed to those with real knowledge of the sytems they affect.  Sign of the times (sign of the end of the road for modern finance as we know it).

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:32 | 3522286 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Da Wall Street Boyz have all the fun.

I suspect most of them will die from STD's long before they make it to the People's Court.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:43 | 3522348 Manthong
Manthong's picture

once again with this link..       CD, it may happen a little quicker than some folks realize

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:46 | 3522358 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Thank God Mrs. Cog and I have mated for life. :)

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:06 | 3522472 Manthong
Manthong's picture

In this venal and secular world, long time monagamy can be an asset..

I have a lot too.. I wonder if we can monetize it?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:53 | 3522692 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Yeah, keep justifying it to yourself like that.  You're a miserable married bastard just like me.  If I had a hookers-n-blow lifestyle you wouldn't see me posting on ZH.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:35 | 3522304 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

The systems are too complicated for even the persons with knowledge of the systems to fruitfully manage...  the fact that they're not implemented in strategic decision making is irrelevant...  (aside from the fact that the people who are typically capable are also the people who refuse to and/or suck ass at playing the political game at the office; in short, they're NEVER included in strategic decision making).

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:41 | 3522338 centerline
centerline's picture

Definately a related problem.  Maximum complexity = fragile.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:32 | 3522287 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

"perfectly honest" is such a self destructive phrase. When you're the latter, all the former disappears 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:35 | 3522299 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Nice observation.

If I remember correctly you practice law? If so then you are well acquainted with the concept of truth, legal truth and provable truth. They are NOT all the same thing. :)

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:37 | 3522316 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

If you want to kill your case, then just take the stand and preface a sentence with "to be honest"...  bad habit for a lot of people...  (the cross examination follow-up is always "well, have you been dishonest about everything you've told us previously?)

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:05 | 3522460 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

Well, to be perfectly honest...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:21 | 3522537 Sean7k
Sean7k's picture

Law and Truth? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Take the time to read , "The Rape of Justice" by Mullins. Read about Merchant and Admiralty law. Judges are bought and paid for. Attorneys play the game to extract the maximum amount of money from clients- even losing cases, just to win on appeal. 

Law is just the means to enslave the masses. Read about "invisible contracts". The only escape from slavery is through complete evolution beyond the State and Central Banking. Everything else is just noise.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:26 | 3522552 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

This is nonsense...  Depends on the practitioner.  I can say that if this was true, then there would be a lot more attorneys out of business.  Simply put, you can't do shit like that and stay in business very long.  You're arguing the exception and not the rule.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:31 | 3523087 Thisson
Thisson's picture

I agree with Machoman.  The legal system is certainly not perfect, but it's more good than bad.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 13:53 | 3523177 Sean7k
Sean7k's picture

Bullshit. The information is all over the place. Check out NY judge appointments. As long as you are part of a system that prioritizes merchant law over common law ( and thereby the constitution) you are a scumbag. I am arguing the rule- read the book. 

The People are taught to respect this system and are penalized if they DON'T use lawyers. You have to defend it, otherwise, you're out of business.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:59 | 3523460 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Also nonsense.  Pro se litigants tend to have an inherent advantage because the court bends over backwards to explain the law for them and make good arguments on their behalf...  The largest issue with pro se litigants is that they're often too stupid to understand they have an inherently losing case.  They also tend to be...  blowhards and have terrible courtroom dispositions.  Things which are not conducive to victory and all add up to certain defeat.  

I'll also note that your issues with merchant law, et al, and the "corporation of america", etc...  are fucking nonsense.  They're desperate attempts by bullshit artists to conjure a legal basis for defecting.  I can assure you, that those methods are sealed tighter than a dolphin's asshole.  If you want "sovereignty" then you've got to get it the old fashioned way.  You ought to be able to know a sales pitch when you hear one.

That said, I find common law to be much more sound, logically, than many of its successor statutes.  Look at it this way, which process is likely to result in a more sound system: legal scholars debating public policy and developing a framework around the best arguments or the legislature (bought and paid) not bothering to read any law it passes?  Most all of your complaints are off the mark when directed towards the judiciary.  In many respects, the judiciary has its hands bound by statute...  it's as simple as that.  Outside of declaring a law unconstitutional, the courts are bound to accept it.  In other words, you needn't buy a judge when he's compelled to follow the law passed by the guy who is in your pocket.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 15:08 | 3523514 Almost Solvent
Almost Solvent's picture

For a thousand years, the common law was - your home is your castle. Someone on your property, shoot first & ask questions later. But, if in public, you have a duty to run away if possible, if not, then self defense.


In the last couple of decades, some states thought, fuck it, shoot first anytime anywhere based on your subjective feeling, hundreds of years of common law be damned.

Same thing goes for private rights of action to enforce the laws when the government lackeys do nothing.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 19:06 | 3524388 Sean7k
Sean7k's picture

Well, you can spout all the trash you want, lacking any support for your statements. Similar to the perjury constantly practiced by lawyers through coached witnesses. Abuse of pre-trial discovery or pre-trial trial as you would know it. Can you say bills of attainer? Judicial discretion and on and on. 

You want to degrade and insult, but you refuse to use citations. You didn't address invisible contracts ( from bank accounts, SS, Drivers licenses, Federal reserve notes, Taxation, etc, etc. ALL FROM MERCHANT LAW. 

Eustace Mulins is no bullshit artist, but you obviously are. The Legal Studies Group of the National Commission for Judicial Reform is in full support of his work. What have you got? Opinions. 

Judges hands are tied? What a imbecile. Statutes only matter at the END OF A TRIAL. Who controls all that goes on during the process? Lawyers and judges. 

You really are a scumbag. 

Fri, 05/03/2013 - 10:34 | 3526666 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

I can discuss it because I'm in the trenches every day...  I see it first hand...  and, again, IT DEPENDS ON WHERE YOU ARE AS TO HOW THE LOCAL BAR PRACTICES.  Believe it or not, there are still plenty parts of this country that believe in the sanctity of the court and tend to practice in a morally permissible way.

That said, you are completely mistaken about whether or not the court is bound by statute.  Typically, separation of powers demands that the legislature not prescribe or otherwise dictate practice or procedure to the judiciary.  However, that is the extent of it...  which leaves an incredible playground for the legislature.  For example, who gives a shit about procedure when the legislature can pass a strict liability offense?  Claw back monies from people who were paid for goods/services from a company that just filed bankruptcy?  ADA compliance...  osha...  title 7...  FINS cases/mandated reporting...  penalty for not having health insurance...  eminent domain...  sovereign immunity...  qualified immunity...  recording acts...  UCC...  tort reform...  you name it.

The only thing court procedure does is attempt to level the playing field and ensure that the correct conclusion is reached based upon the law...  Given that the legislature has decided to supercede common law or otherwise supplement it (see generally the increased requirements for adverse possession), then the law in dispute was likely not created by the court system.  And yes, in the separation of powers, the legislature has the capacity to do so...  But, in the struggle between the two, the judiary did claw back the right to declare laws unconstitutional...  (however, there is a far gap between "bad" law and "unconstitutional" law; the former being voluminous, the latter being more rare).  In the subsequent years, the legislature has filled the power vacuum with its own creations (laws), rooting out the common law where possible.  In other words, if the conclusion you're reaching is that you are a debt serf...  or that you can't fuck with someone else's mansion, then the procedure to reach that goal is irrelevant.  Jury nullification is a possibility (the last safeguard), but you're not even entitled to a jury trial in many instances.

There are some small pockets of the common law remaining, enough so to make a good argument many times, but this is the exception and not the rule...  and the trend is certainly towards statutory law rather than pure common law.  The concurrence of the two can either be superceded by new law or "supplemented" by new law to increase the common law elements/requirements.  In the end, the judiciary has been relegated to having its hands bound by bad law.  This is the primary reason for "unjust" conclusions...  not crooked actors.

PS, statutes dictate pleading...  pleading is an issue at ALL TIMES of a lawsuit.  For example, if the statute requires that in order to be guilty of X crime, you have to do A, B, and C, then what do you think governs the relevance of discovery?  What do you think both sides will use as their goalpost for proving or disproving matters?  Motion to dismiss?  Motion for summary judgment?  Directed verdict?  Judgment on the pleadings?  All things PRIOR to the conclusion of trial...  you have no idea what you're talking about...  and, it's great that you're passionate about the subject, but you're doing a disservice to everyone by spouting bullshit.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:33 | 3522297 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

I would have stuck defense right after financial.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:37 | 3522303 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I don't wish to be droned. :)

Every other profession is killing me softly.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:55 | 3522408 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Not true none them party like finance people, the finance people from South America are even worse than the Wall Street types but are more fun and actually have some humanistic qualities to them.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:05 | 3522461 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

2nd string New Jersey senators get more free trips and younger hookers- these wanna-be banksters need to pick up their game or go home.  

Imagine the hookers, blow, and gambling excursions that Apple's subcontractors can afford with Apple's overseas cash horde, and how much those very subcontractors must have must of dished out on a legion of corrupt Chinese apparatchiks in order to get Apple's operation licensed and unharassed over time...  Then there the big boys who play in the major leagues... as in oil majors and major mining conglomerates...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:22 | 3522224 Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

2 more fuckin Jews to Obummer's cabinet...Guess they have to search real hard in the 1% of the US population to find the right people for the job...the right people as in experts at 'fucking the rest of the gullible sheeps'

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:12 | 3522494 giddy
giddy's picture

...ummmmm...khazarian cabal...easy to spot...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:22 | 3522225 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Reality has become a drug addict and I don't associate with addicts.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:23 | 3522229 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

That's just the stuff we know about.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:30 | 3522276 prains
prains's picture

yeah, the story seemed a little "debauchery-lite" to me as well. also the theme of the article made it sound like it was this guy here and this guy over there, cherry picked.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:35 | 3522306 uno
uno's picture

look at the UK with the jimmy savile pedofile news - MSM + Politicians.  In the US the person who covered for Jerry Sandusky get a job with the Federal Government working on 'national security' projects.

TPTB love to get judges, politicians, bankers, media idiots on tape with pedofile blackmail.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:50 | 3522361 Manthong
Manthong's picture

I just wonder it the little sweeties will get the anti-bacterial resistant clap before, or after they get the morning after pill?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:24 | 3522236 maskone909
maskone909's picture


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:32 | 3522285 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

just one test... can you spell "BUY"?

and no copy pasting, because we'll know...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:24 | 3522238 NRGIsFree
NRGIsFree's picture

So the only question is which one of these guys will be appointed as the next Treasury Secretary..

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:25 | 3522241 Charles Nelson ...
Charles Nelson Reilly's picture

man, are these fuckers gonna be shitting their pants when people lose everything they have courtesy of these fucks, and you have an army of "concerned citizens" roll into Greenwich, CT looking for blood.  Hopefully most of them are caught by suprise and are gutted and left on their estate's front lawns.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:38 | 3522323 RichardENixon
RichardENixon's picture

Let me know when that happens and I'll switch channels from Duck Dynasty to CNN

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:14 | 3522499 giddy
giddy's picture

...and the WASPs left Greenwich long ago...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:25 | 3522242 Widowmaker
Widowmaker's picture

The most pathetic display of ignorance is that anyone at all thinks that laws or rules mean a fucking thing whatsoever.

Why follow any of them when "money" and incorporation makes you immune?

You don't.  Only the sucker plays by rules.


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:32 | 3522292 yrbmegr
yrbmegr's picture

"Profit is found between the law and the enforcement."

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:43 | 3522347 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

Laws and rules are doing exactly what they were intended to do: benefit the minority that creates them.

A couple thousand laws here, a couple thousand laws there, before you know it, you have Pharaohs and slaves.


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:50 | 3522376 Vooter
Vooter's picture

"Only the sucker plays by rules."

Something that the 9/11 hijackers knew all too well...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:25 | 3522243 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

cavorting with bankers, strippers and hookers.   All very redundant

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:26 | 3522244 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture

Bitches and blow, bitchez!

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:01 | 3522738 Big Corked Boots
Big Corked Boots's picture

2006: Booze, bitches and blow.

2010: Bullets, beans and bullion.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:26 | 3522245 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

I still believe that this country could be brought to its knees with 300 really hot hookers and a hidden camera.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:30 | 3522264 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

I'LL TAKE CARE OF THE HOOKERS, you take care of the camera...


.... more question about my expence account...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:37 | 3522314 RichardENixon
RichardENixon's picture

Take a lot of taxis

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:23 | 3523309 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

That's what they want you to think.  The reality is that their "trophy" wives with eyeliner creased with wrinkles AFTER botox- dimples on their smelly @$$3s and more grossness with more hair on their face than the "hot hooker" shemales.  It's either that or the chubby Brazilian mail order ***s.

There are BEAUTIFUL girls in these areas from all over the world.  I'm talking top of the line, educated, CLASSY, multilingual, from good home gorgeous girls.  These girls who have options typically prefer to have a steady good looking boyfriend with an education, common sense and a good family.  I've seen these girls go without guys until they can get exactly what they want.   Buy them diamonds, 50+ rose boquets, etc... they'll take the gifts.  But you ain't going to get them unless you are exactly what they want. 

They can be picky, so they are. 

I haven't seen many traders with these girls.  Maybe a doctor. 
This is why some of the traders are so vile and bitter. 



Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:27 | 3522246 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

Obama's $7 million Hawaiian vaca and Michelle's $1 million vaca in Spain was just the tippy tip of the iceberg. 
I'm soooo glad I got robbed for TARP so I can provide incompetant assholes behind a prop desk with meth laced coke. 


Man, if you're spending oodles of cash oon some nasty, infested hooker; laced meth and plastic troll wives-your life SUCKS!

No amount of money is going to change that.


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:52 | 3522252 Mercury
Mercury's picture

Commissions are dilutive to performance. Always.

If you can deliver outperformance while overpaying for commissions that also support some naughty R&R on the side, you're going to get the AUM and many will be happy to give it to you.

If your fund/product delivers crap performance AND you're getting naughty R&R on the side, on your client's dime, your clients (likely fiduciaries themselves) aren't doing their job.

Keep my money away from them when they blow up and I don't care what bankers do with their clients or counterparties.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:28 | 3522259 MythicalFish
MythicalFish's picture



Can't we find some dwarf throwing, crystal meth, baby seal clubbing?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:28 | 3522261 SpanishGoop
SpanishGoop's picture

Well they do have a stressfull job with all those "unpredictable" "market" movements nowdays.



Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:33 | 3522262 CaptainSpaulding
Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:28 | 3522266 DawgAss
DawgAss's picture

Just another day in the life of the privileged!

Sucks being a regular "Joe"

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:13 | 3523269 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

The field is chock full of esp. guys with mommy issues who need krappy made in China material things to compensate for their lack of self worth? 

And if you see them, you'll see why.  Most are nothing to write home about, just cranky self hating now cranky tweakers.  

"Sucks being a regular Joe" - much less than you think. 


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:29 | 3522268 Savvy
Savvy's picture

A bank manager proposed to me once, I declined. So he started showing up at my workplace in expensive sports cars, throwing little pissy fits when I gave my attention to my job not him. Some things are more important than money... like self-respect? LOL

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:29 | 3522271 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

It kills me that the clients don't think to themselves...."hmmmm this guy sure spends a lot of money, I wonder where he gets it."

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 14:10 | 3523253 combatsnoopy
combatsnoopy's picture

You're talking about the super genius baby boomer "non-materialistic" flowerchildren who also thought that John Lennon-a rich heroine addict, was really an agent for "non-materialism".  With the Beatles' private jet, their yacht...

they just want to know that their real estate keeps going up and up and up...

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:32 | 3522275 orangedrinkandchips
orangedrinkandchips's picture

Funny, Cocaine and Hookers are like oil and water.


I mean you get real high and you got complete shrinkage! Not pool shrinkage, but real shrinkage (all the while youre ready to fuck anyting....including the crack of dawn!)


Call me crazy, and maybe it's just me but it's really the cocaine curse! lol....I havent touched the shit in 15 years but dont think it's changed!



Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:50 | 3522379 prains
prains's picture

sounds like a lot less work to do on the business end of that transaction........

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:15 | 3522516 YC2
YC2's picture

It makes the spirit willing but the flesh weak, but for one to lead to the other you only need the spirit to be willing!

Best to avoid both but I can see how it would go down regularly.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 12:00 | 3522732 pirea
pirea's picture

this staff is good only for hyper dicks 

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:31 | 3522280 yrbmegr
yrbmegr's picture

So this is where all the QE is going.  Good to know all that money is getting into the economy after all.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:32 | 3522291 lemarche
lemarche's picture


Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:33 | 3522295 writingsonthewall
writingsonthewall's picture

I have worked in many banks and several financial institutions and I have witnessed the thickest idiots being paid extrodinary sums for simply 'guessing well'.

For them it's a train ride - and when it's over (when they make a loss) they hop on the next train.

When ordinary people actually discover this for themselves - rather than hiding behined the media mask of "bankers get paid lots - ergo they MUST be talented" - there will be a revolution.

The 'talent' of bankers is not getting exposed as the fraudulent morons they really are.

In the UK they are making theunemployed take 'tests' to prove themselves - so how about testing a few in employment so we can see how our world relies on moronic imbociles.

This is often demonstrated by the sheer panic, massive incompetence and downright failure of the security services - everytime there is an attack.

Stability and safety are all an illusion.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 11:14 | 3522500 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

"The 'talent' of bankers is not getting exposed as the fraudulent morons they really are."

True of politicians also but the public is even more incapable of realizing it.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:33 | 3522296 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

I thought what happens there, stays there... those that get the clap

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:35 | 3522308 Seize Mars
Seize Mars's picture

This article doesn't really tell it the way it is. These companies, ICAP and do on, are brokers' brokers. You don't hear about these guys because all they do is act as intermediates between the banks you know. So for example when jpm is trading OTC options, ICAP might broker the trade to GS or anyone else. That way jpm and GS never speak to one another directly. So these guys work very hard to compete for trades, they make money, and they buy their clients some booze. So what. That's a competitive, market driven system. Ugly, maybe, but honest.

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 10:45 | 3522355 Vooter
Vooter's picture

"Ugly, maybe, but honest."

Who gives a fuck? They're still CUNTS. What don't you get?

Thu, 05/02/2013 - 21:39 | 3524930 Seize Mars
Seize Mars's picture

I disagree. I know these types. They (interdealer brokers) are mostly blue-collar guys who are all smart as hell. They work hard and they take big risks in order to try to catch an edge. If and when they blow up, they don't ask for - nor do they receive - government bailouts. These guys are not "bankers."

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!