Friendly Reminder: CNBC Viewership Plunges To Eight Year Lows

Tyler Durden's picture


Update: we decided it may be an opportune time to remind readers of this particular fact... not opinion, not propaganda, not insinuation. Fact, which apparently has forced a once informative medium, and now purely propaganda infomercial, to stoop so low to be in need of trolling websites to generate incremental eyeballs.

* * *

By now it is well known that the ubiquity of central planning (not to mention the persistent threat of HFT flash crashes as exhibited by yesterday's twitter-driven #Hash crash) in capital "markets", has made trading stocks in a rigged casino a sucker's game - one that retail investors have decided to shun, and nearly 5 years after Lehman have still to come back in any size to the stock market.

One of the main, unintended consequences of this development to prop up markets at all costs, even if it means removing all logic and reliance on fundamental data, has been the complete evaporation of interest in any finance-related media, forcing the bulk of financial outlets to rely on such cheap gimmicks as slideshows, pictures of kittens, trolling and generally hiring liberal arts majors straight out of school to copy and paste articles while paying them minimum wage, and providing absolutely no insight (and then wondering why the Series ZZ preferred investors will never get their money back, let alone the A round).

However, nowhere is this more obvious than in the relentless imploding viewership of once financial media titan, CNBC, which lately has become a sad, one-sided caricature of its once informative self, whose only agenda is to get the most marginal Joe Sixpack to dump his hard-earned cash into 100x P/E stocks, and where according to data from Nielsen Media Research, the total and demographic (25-54) viewership during the prime time segment (9:30am - 5:00 pm) just tumbled to 216K and 40K - the lowest recorded viewership since mid 2005 and sliding.

So why the relentless collapse in CNBC viewers, which in turns leads to plunging ad revenues (aside from our observations from last summer on just this topic) and which has forced the station to even resort to muppets as a cheap ratings-boosting gimmick? Perhaps it has something to do with outbursts like this, where 13 minutes into the clip, one Jim Cramer tells the camera point blank when discussing daily market gyrations, and with absolutely no remorse, that "i want everyone to play that game at home by recognizing that fraud is part of the equation and the government cannot stop it."

That's right: on one hand CNBC's most overcaffeinated anchor admits that the market is nothing but uncontrollable fraud, and on the other he beckons viewers and listeners, usually with the assistance of assorted bovine sounds, to "buy, buy, buy."

Perhaps the greater fool is truly dead, or simply the embedded hypocrisy of the CNBC stock "infomercial" is so transparent that nobody really cares what the Comcast subsidiary's paid entertainers have to say any more.

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Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:31 | 3540448 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

First they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then you punch them in the face.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:36 | 3540466 fightthepower
fightthepower's picture

Who is interested in watching official State propaganda?  How is CNBC different than North Korea's media? 



Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:43 | 3540490 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

Maybe if one or two take it in the ass live on air..


Will that help?


Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:47 | 3540499 doomandbloom
doomandbloom's picture

Virgin airways is introducing see through tops...maybe CNBC should do the same?

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:54 | 3540522 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

that's about virgin trains, but i would commend virgin atlantic for pushing see-through tops, as frankly, their planes are incredibly ordinary


Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:00 | 3540529 Zer0head
Zer0head's picture

Sadly, Bloomberg TV is actually worse if that is possible. Between the pompous Bowtied buffoon or the high pitched nasally Emily Westworld Chang  BBG has devolved into a facebook/Apple/ and whatever is the stock of the day infomercial when it isn't laying the foundations for the tiny perfect Mayor's eventual run for the Oval office. 


But at least it's free to watch online  but then you get what you pay for.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:01 | 3540556 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

it's free to watch online.

so are the stock and FX recommendations made by goldman sachs.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:39 | 3540680 Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture



Ironically, looking at the above-chart, it appears that CNBC would benefit from another market crash...



Wed, 05/08/2013 - 11:10 | 3541163 fourchan
fourchan's picture

hft's killing the retail guy will do that to viewing.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:05 | 3540572 philipat
philipat's picture

So what about a ZH Cable Channel to tell the truth?

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:10 | 3540592 CrimsonAvenger
CrimsonAvenger's picture

Would be great to see, but it would have to be a subscriber model - you're not going to get any advertisers by telling the truth.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:14 | 3540609 new game
new game's picture

half of the viewership is banks lobbies; da-really, like fuck this in the ass.

hey joe-blow-KERNEL BRAIN - FUCK OFF...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:16 | 3540615 Manthong
Manthong's picture

if i f'd with the "market" anymore, i would short google..

idiots just blew their brand to pieces

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:16 | 3540613 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

GBTV is looking to add talent...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:18 | 3540619 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Capital idea my friend!  Who cares if the drop-dead ZHTV money-honeys understand what they are reading or not in those golden cheerleading outfits....

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:31 | 3540657 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

i love zh as much as the next guy, and certainly spend my share of spare time on this site, but with all due respect, zh is just as biased as cnbc, but just the opposite direction.

one should never get all his/her news from one source.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 13:51 | 3541835 ShankyS
ShankyS's picture

Only if they bring back Marla!


Still looking for the app. 

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:55 | 3540523 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

CNBS = Joseph Goebbels wet dream!

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:55 | 3540530 spastic_colon
spastic_colon's picture the numbers include

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:42 | 3540707 max2205
max2205's picture

ZH Financial news network....nice ring to it

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:01 | 3540550 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Why not? It definitely boosts sales.

As a young tad I worked a beach bar and the owner tried having the waitresses wear sheer tops (no bra).

Sales went up about 40% and stayed there. The tips almost doubled. Any waitress grumbling ceased.

 Ta-tas are a winner.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 11:54 | 3541355 scraping_by
scraping_by's picture

Stews are wage-earners; every dollar increase goes to the bosses.

Now, if there was a wage-differential, a skin bonus, then we might be talking...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 13:34 | 3541687 Diet Coke and F...
Diet Coke and Floozies's picture


Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:47 | 3540500 fightthepower
fightthepower's picture

Becky Quick does what ever Buffett maybe. 

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:52 | 3540515 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Are you suggesting that Becky would strap on?

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:56 | 3540534 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture






Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:04 | 3540570 Frozen IcQb
Frozen IcQb's picture

Follow the FED. Inflate.....the cleavage

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 11:32 | 3541264 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

Sara Eisen would . . . and did


Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:39 | 3540691 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Becky Quickie and the rest are impressed by big money. Rather than being objective and hard-hitting CNBS has become pump channel 1 and Balloonberg is pump channel 2.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:00 | 3540547 1100-TACTICAL-12
1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

Show your tit's Mandy.... More Cowbell...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 11:12 | 3541174 fourchan
fourchan's picture

oh that stupid accent.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:04 | 3540571 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

Becky Quike getting oral cream pies from all the guests in the morning, ratings would go to infinity and beyond.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:10 | 3540595 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Bukkake Becky

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 10:25 | 3540922 Dealer
Dealer's picture

Bartiromo has a great set of DSL!

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:13 | 3540605 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

While opening a can of soup with those teeth of hers...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 12:46 | 3541558 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

OOooooo!  Good idea!  Do we get to pick?

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 14:16 | 3541959 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Maybe one of the Tylers (the one in Miami?) can get a ZH spot and go tete-a-tete with Cramer?

Monetary & Fiscal OCTAGON, baby!  In the Blue-pill corner we have... and in the Red-pill corner we have...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:49 | 3540508 HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

It's insufferable.  Both CNBC and Bloomberg Radio have become informercials for stocks.  Absolutely 0 value.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:56 | 3540533 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

cnbc were continuously blabbering about "great value" and "undervalued equities" back in 2008-2009 - ie, it's always sell-side, never actually taking an objective side at bull vs bear

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:00 | 3540537 aint no fortuna...
aint no fortunate son's picture

who is this cnbs and bloomberg that everyone talks about? I must check my TV's channel block status...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:00 | 3540546 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

it's a little known fact that cnbc were formerly known as "amazing discoveries" and used to run on late night TVs in the 80'es.

tar? ink? rust? iodine? didi7 gets rid of them all!

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 08:58 | 3540540 Cdad
Cdad's picture

According to The BlowHorn[CNBC], it's all Tyler Durden's fault.  

Wild swinging round house punches, catching nothing but air.  If anyone was on still on the fence regarding The BlowHorn, Joe Kernan made all things abundantly clear this morning. 

Way to go COMCAST!  Way to ship shape that dying network...that you...errrrr....bought.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 10:13 | 3540881 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

Coming up with the name BlowHorn was genius Cdad. Thx...

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 13:55 | 3541844 ShankyS
ShankyS's picture

I believe the term is "Digital Dickweeds" LOL. 

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:42 | 3540709 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Quite sickening.  Your brain can only take so much of the BS before you start to look new or information which looks be factual.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 14:20 | 3541975 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

"It's insufferable.  Both CNBC and Bloomberg Radio have become informercials for stocks.  Absolutely 0 value."

Actually, as an engineer (good with numbers, right?), all you have to do is "Follow the money trail".

"If it pays, it stays.  If it don't, it won't".  You can quote me on that.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 17:37 | 3542650 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

So, is there an ETF for dilithium crystal futures?

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 09:02 | 3540558 freewolf7
freewolf7's picture

Or there's Comedy Central.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 10:07 | 3540839 oddball
oddball's picture

Not so funny is the fact most drones get their dose of propaganda from that network.

Wed, 05/08/2013 - 11:20 | 3541214 Shevva
Shevva's picture

Na Waldens pushing tech stock at least charlie had a real job.

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