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The Latest "Inflation Evasion" Scam: Bars Serving Caramelized Rubbing Alcohol Instead Of Scotch

Tyler Durden's picture




 

In the past, food and alcoholic beverage makers got in trouble for attempting to cover the impact of inflation (such as the 12% Y/Y increase in Fed employee salaries) by diluting the content, or simply serving less, of their products while keeping the price constant: the same thing as rising prices, but optically more palatable to less than sophisticated consumers. That was the past. A new breed of industrious, high profit margin-seeking alcohol vendors have decided to skip this protocol entirely and instead of serving booze, have opted to replace the product outright. As AP reports, at numerous New Jersey bars, including 13 TGI Fridays restaurants, owners were accused of substituting cheap booze while charging premium prices. The profitability at all costs situation was so bad that at one bar, a mixture that included rubbing alcohol and caramel coloring was sold as scotch. In another, premium liquor bottles were refilled with water — and apparently not even clean water at that.

State officials provided those new details Thursday on raids they conducted a day earlier as part of a yearlong investigation dubbed Operation Swill.

 

As part of Operation Swill, investigators collected 1,000 open bottles of vodka, gin, rum, scotch, whiskey and tequila from the wells of the bars, state Attorney General Jeffrey Chiesa said.

 

“This alleged scheme is a dishonest ruse to increase profits and is a slap in the face of the consumer,” Chiesa said.

 

Within seven days, the establishments must turn over records to help state authorities determine how many patrons were overcharged and by how much. They also will have to inform the state which employees were at work the days samples were covertly taken earlier this year.

Being ripped off at bars by industrious dilutive bartenders is hardly new, however it has taken on a new life ever since Bernanke started diluting the fiat supply:

In January and February, investigators went to 63 establishments they suspected were scamming liquor customers. They ordered drinks neat — that is, without ice or mixers — and then covertly took samples for testing.

 

Of 150 samples collected, 30 were not the brand as which they were being sold.

Somehow we doubt The Briad Group will make a big public announcement about just how it is that it manages to post very healthy profits, even if the patrons drinking its "booze" hardly are:

TGI Fridays Inc. said it was conducting its own investigation, working with the franchisee that owns the 13 restaurants cited, The Briad Group.

 

Briad, based in Livingston, said it “takes great pride in the quality of food and drink” served at its TGI Fridays franchises and was troubled and surprised by the allegations. It said in an emailed statement it would take immediate steps to correct any problems it identified.

 

“We want every assurance possible that our guests can continue to feel confident in the great food and drink they order at our T.G.I. Friday’s restaurants,” said Rick Barbrick, president of The Briad Restaurant Group.

And if TGIF is doing it, everyone else is.

What is confusing to us is why there is so much anger at such criminally dilutive operations in our every day lives, yet nobody dares to lift a finger at that uber-dilution mastermind, who literally dilutes the fiat supply (and yes, money is fungible, and yes, reserves will spill out into the broader economy sooner or later: just as soon as banks realize they can no longer make easier money in assorted rigged capital markets) to the tune of 2.5% each month, Ben Bernanke?

 

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Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:01 | 3596413 The Thunder Child
The Thunder Child's picture

Nobody messes with the scotch, that's below the belt.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:11 | 3596423 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

When it's time to ReRax... Make it 'Suntory' time...

~~~

"Canned Heat" bitchez!... The choice of 'The Andromeda Strain' generation

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sterno

In Michael Crichton's 1969 novel "The Andromeda Strain" and the 1971 movie based on it, one of the survivors of the deadly extraterrestrial virus is an old man addicted to "Squeeze". Constant consumption of Sterno has altered his blood pH, making him at least temporarily immune to the disease.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:12 | 3596453 Manthong
Manthong's picture

time to unleash the muslims with meat cleavers here

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:13 | 3596463 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

I'll take 'POTENT POTABLES' for 100 CheesePopeBux Alex...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:34 | 3596472 Manthong
Manthong's picture

retribution for unconscionable atrocities against humanity

then again.. those in-room serving carts in upscale hotels may have a hidden benefit once the filet is ate and Dom or Moet is all downed.

 obviously, some folks are not fans of acerbic low wit which is the essence of sarcasm  :-D

i'll take "squeeze" for 200, Alex

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:47 | 3596598 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Thank Greed, It's Fake...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:38 | 3596759 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

You could walk into the local TGIF here in a couple of hours, and there'll be some wannabe ordering call scotch to impress the gal from accounting. None of them ever hearing of this news, none of the help hearing of the news for that matter.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:49 | 3596976 Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

A few of the local pubs nearby are also serving warm beer....actually very warm smelly beer.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 21:47 | 3597616 flacon
flacon's picture

I usually only buy name-brand beer that is in the bottle at bars. Even the "draft" beers are watered down. 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 22:32 | 3597707 Ying-Yang
Ying-Yang's picture
Drinking rubbing alcohol can cause alcohol poisoning. The symptoms of alcohol poisoning are vomiting, confusion, slow breathing (less than eight breaths per minute), seizures, low body temperature, pale or blueish skin and unconsciousness. All of these symptoms will not necessarily be present in every case of alcohol poisoning. In cases of isopropyl ingestion, because of its strong effect on the central nervous system, a person may experience lethargy or ataxia, or may go into a coma. Because isopropyl also affects the GI tract, a person who has drunk it can have stomach pain, cramps and hemorrhagic gastritis. Someone who has ingested rubbing alcohol will also have a fruity smell to his or her breath.
Fri, 05/24/2013 - 22:59 | 3597761 akak
akak's picture

 

Drinking rubbing alcohol can cause alcohol poisoning. The symptoms of alcohol poisoning are vomiting, confusion, slow breathing (less than eight breaths per minute), seizures, low body temperature, pale or blueish skin and unconsciousness.

I think you just described the average man on the average Sunday morning in Lower Slobovia.

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 03:07 | 3598007 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

If you're shithead enough to live in New Jersey, then you're shithead enough to drink rubbing alcohol at your local bar.  Carry on.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:52 | 3596611 SheepleLOVEched...
SheepleLOVEcheddarbaybiscuits's picture

Who orders a scotch from TGI Fridays?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:00 | 3596640 quasimodo
quasimodo's picture

Who the fuck even eats there?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:14 | 3596700 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Hey c'mon man!... Thatz where Brian Flanagan cut his teeth before makin' it big time at the SELL BLOCK...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:42 | 3596956 Manthong
Manthong's picture

just for s&g's and fyi to all .. I have not purchased an adult beverage at retail for at least 4 years,,

and barely partake at all anymoar..

I am still trying to pull that same trick off with banks.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:02 | 3596643 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

Who even walks into a TGI Fridays??? Anytime I have to go into a chain restaurant, I just assume I'm going to get food poisoning.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:19 | 3596707 BurningFuld
BurningFuld's picture

A TGI Fridays OR a Sushi Restaurant for that matter:

http://www.forbes.com/sites/larryolmsted/2013/02/21/fake-fish-on-shelves...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:44 | 3596779 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

I've known restaurants to pour cheap wine into expensive empty bottles and serve it.

Some restaurant management is no different that your average banker, just more broke.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:07 | 3596864 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

Anytime I have to go into a chain restaurant, I just assume I'm going to ...

the bathroom.  

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:58 | 3597007 pods
pods's picture

And for dessert can I have the Explosive Diarrhea please?

Like Taco Bell; if you sit down to eat, the food never leaves the building.

Runs through you like a Japanese Bullet Train!

pods

 

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 03:09 | 3598008 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

The Tex-Mex Bullet Train?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:05 | 3596659 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

It's an ethnic thang.

I'm a marker's mark kinda guy.  Does rubbing alcohol taste better or worse than burnt rubber bands?

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 16:35 | 3598723 mkkby
mkkby's picture

It tastes great, but only with the TGIF seabiscuit burger and fish free sushi.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:19 | 3596893 Vic Odd
Vic Odd's picture

"Who orders a scotch from TGI Fridays?"

Answer: People who can't tell scotch from caramel colored rubbing alchohol.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 17:39 | 3597108 max2205
max2205's picture

Opps....somebody forgot to make the weekly payoff to the 'inspectors'

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:22 | 3596713 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

if they treat the drinks like that...you know the food is on the up and up

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:32 | 3596749 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

Ummm boy..., I'll have your 100% grass fed free range Tillamok cheese burger.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:42 | 3596775 quasimodo
quasimodo's picture

2 years and 30 pounds ago I would salivate over the chicken fingers with honey musTARD sauce, damn those are goooood. Then I would wonder why the next morning I was shitting through a screen door at 30 feet and feeling run down. Not to mention those damn fries that leaves one tasting the spices two days later........BELCH

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:27 | 3596920 Vic Odd
Vic Odd's picture

They dont go there for food and drinks, they go there for the flair.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 19:48 | 3597375 blueRidgeBoy
blueRidgeBoy's picture

I'm not really comfortable talking about my flair

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:26 | 3596726 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

They got Jacked! And it wan't even Jack Daniels but rather Jack Sh*t...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:05 | 3596852 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

It's a Yukon, love that Jack weekend.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:21 | 3596496 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Can you say that here?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:49 | 3596604 TerminalDebt
TerminalDebt's picture

yeah you're allowed to say meat cleavers. Pressure Cookers are a different animal though.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:09 | 3596679 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Only on Fridays, but no pork chop jokes, unless you have a back stage pass from Saturday Night Live.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 17:25 | 3597081 Freddie
Freddie's picture

NJ is filled with Musilims.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:13 | 3596461 Divine Wind
Divine Wind's picture

 

 

LOL. When I lived in the Orient Suntory was my preference.

Also used it to clean cuts and insect bits and to take street grime off my motor bike.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:10 | 3596436 Jekyll_n_Hyde_Island
Jekyll_n_Hyde_Island's picture

Huh.  Old High school trick there -- raiding the ol' parents liquor cabinet.  Here's the problem though: this shouldn't surprise anyone.  We've replaced the dollar with toilet paper, why not dilute some booze with the expectation that the sheep won't know the difference?

  That's where these business admin grad, TGIF managers intellect resides. 

  Between you and me, I'm surprised the vacuous idiots that frequent TGIF were able to tell the difference.

 

  Although it does explain why my long island iced tea tasted like non-potable water and muskox drool.

 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:28 | 3596731 knukles
knukles's picture

That's funny..."non-potable water and muskox drool"

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:12 | 3596460 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Grandpa used to say America is one missing cup of coffee away from revolution.  But scotch?!?!?!  Shit, the guillotines may roll out now.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:08 | 3596677 underman
underman's picture

That's just it!  Until there's a missing cup of coffee!  There will be no revolution as long as we get our lattes. 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:31 | 3596535 auntiesocial
auntiesocial's picture

lawsoot.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:41 | 3596570 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

The value of the lawsuit took a serious hit when this information hit the public airwaves...  Although, you can now try and cozy up to a class action I guess...  individual damages are...  nil...  unless physical injury occurs.  Might be some statutory damages for bait and switch type consumer protection laws depending on the jurisdiction...  but, generally speaking, the damages are nil. 

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 09:18 | 3598182 Dingleberry
Dingleberry's picture

Just drink bottled beer like I do. Problem solved.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:00 | 3596415 Godisanhftbot
Godisanhftbot's picture

 That's already my drink of choice. Glad to see it's catching on.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:01 | 3596418 The Thunder Child
The Thunder Child's picture

Vegas that you?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:13 | 3596462 Cdad
Cdad's picture

I do all of my drinking at CVS these days.  I can usually get a half bottle of mouthwash down before anyone notices me.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:17 | 3596481 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

1+ lol

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:30 | 3596530 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Gotta love the places that still keep Robitussin DM on the shelves.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:39 | 3596560 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

It's more complicated to buy cough syrup than a suppressed Glock these days.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:48 | 3596601 seek
seek's picture

It really is!

What's crazy is the pseudoephedrine controls (to prevent the manufacture of meth) are now so over-the-top there are are now online instructions on how to make pseudoephedrine from meth, because it's easier to obtain methamphetamine than it is to buy Sudafed over the counter.

http://boingboing.net/2012/02/27/scientific-paper-of-the-day-h.html for the curious.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:53 | 3596616 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

One place recently wouldn't sell me the Zrytec they hid behind the counter without a "state issued drivers license" after refusing to accept my "state issued id card."

I LOLed, questioned his intelligence, and wished him luck with the remainder of his life as I walked away.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:07 | 3596668 Intoxicologist
Intoxicologist's picture

I couldn't purchase horse liniment at a chain farm supply store without producing an ID. 

What the hell are people experimenting with that for?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:24 | 3596719 seek
seek's picture

It might have a solvent someone is using for nefarious purposes.

The one that blew my mind was that I needed to show ID and they had to get out the keys to the locked cabinet at the local grocery store when I went to buy pipe cleaners.

They must have somehow known I was cleaning the gas key of an AR.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:32 | 3596742 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

We can't get iodine crystals any more for the lab. It's critical for our parasitology staining. Only thing available is very dilute solutions...and we're an official hospital lab. I brought in my surgical iodine solution that I use on my horses and we're trying to adapt it. Hopefully the Feds won't arrest us. Not sure what pure iodine crystals are used for but I wish I could contact those nefarious people and try to make a deal.

Miffed;-)

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:07 | 3596861 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Could the scarcity of iodine crystals be business as usual?

http://www.washingtonian.com/articles/people/children-are-dying/index.php

 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 17:00 | 3597011 Jena
Jena's picture

I guess you can't call it a crisis when it fits within the plan so well.  Heinous bastards.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 17:29 | 3597085 seek
seek's picture

Iodine is used for meth production, too. My understanding is if you have the right DEA paperwork you should still be able to get it from approved distributors.

It's the same reason my favorite water purification backup (Polar Pure, basically just iodine crystals) went out of biz, DEA crackdown on iodine.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 20:11 | 3597436 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

This may explain our delemma. We tried 5 distributors and all discontinued carrying it. It must involve too much paperwork/ scrutiny from the DEA to make it worth it. Also of note there is a great push by Lab regulatory agencies to go to more Eco based staining techniques. While I'm all for using less toxic staining, when we paralleled using our own methods vs the new nontoxic one many techs had trouble identifying Giardia ( our most common parasite) because it faintly stained. We complained to the agency that the less toxic methods weren't good enough to provide good lab results. So, now it's impossible to get iodine so we are forced to use the Eco method. Just a coincidence I'm sure. So if you are having horrible intestinal problems and your dr expects a parasite but just seems confused that all the O&P results are negative, this may have something to do with it.

Miffed;-)

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 01:44 | 3597975 seek
seek's picture

Crazy as it sounds, several online guides (presumably targetted at meth cooks) have recipes for extracting iodine from povidone-iodine disinfectant of potassium iodine. Not sure how equipped your lab is, but I bet it's better than your typical meth cook. Yields are crap (apparently 1oz per liter of Povidine-iodine) but I'm guessing you could do a lot of staining with an ounce of iodine.

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 04:43 | 3598036 Parrotile
Parrotile's picture

Without iodine, you'll be rather stuck doing any Gram staining (well, unless you expect everything to be Gram -ve!!)

I'm guessing it's because it's a good oxidiser, and maybe 'cause when carefully mixed with strong ammonia solution, you can produce the highly shock-sensitive nitrogen tri-iodide, which wuld be very useful as a detonator, wouldn't it!

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 11:48 | 3598333 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Oh Parrotile you've brought back memories! I had an teacher in high school that was torturing me in calculus, I was so shy he really got off singling me out. Mr miffed came to my rescue and made up a batch of tri- iodide and put it on the chalk board erasers. That man jumped so hard he hit the side of his desk ,spun around and nearly hit the floor! Whole class almost soiled themselves including me! He never could figure out what happened but seeing him afraid to touch an eraser for the rest of the year was delightful. I had to marry a guy that was so deviously innovative, though I have to admit I'm careful not to piss him off too much! ;-)

Miffed;-)

Oh, and they do allow us to purchase iodine in the dilute form for Gram staining. We just prefer the iodine crystals in PVA Trichrome staining. Just a morphologically better prep. Gosh if Gram's iodine becomes restricted I couldn't do my job. Of course saving lives from bacterial diseases is far less important than saving us from the terrorists and meth addicts.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:30 | 3596746 knukles
knukles's picture

Substitute Krugman fans are using for Palm Oil

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:38 | 3596762 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

I recently had to show my ID ( I'm 72 and look every year of it) to buy a bottle of carburetor/Injector cleaner from the grocery store. Good thing I didn't try to buy a bag of cotton balls and a plastic grocery bag at the same time. I got all huffy and walked out leaving my injector cleaner and ground horsemeat behind.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:46 | 3596784 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Arthritis remedy at 25% the cost of your friendly BigPharma offerings.

Bring some Bag Balm used for chapped udders to your significant udder.

Reduces strech marks and is great for winter chapped hands.

Nice collectable tin for the coffee table to distract your local Jehovah's Witnesses when they come to call.

http://ep.yimg.com/ca/I/entirelypets_2262_280130770

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 17:18 | 3597063 Intoxicologist
Intoxicologist's picture

Too late, they showed up at my house this morning when I was rolling cigarettes out on the porch. 

I never let them across the threshold; always tell them I'm not interested outside (with the dogs circling them and getting them all hairy).  They don't like to stick around long at my house.  One brave one comes out, and the rest of the crew waits in the car. 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:24 | 3596907 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

You don't even need the Robo, just buy the Zzzquil it's the same drug.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:33 | 3596545 yabyum
yabyum's picture

cdad, No kidding most of my etoh over/doses are with mouthwash. Say what you will, they are minty fresh ;)

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:03 | 3596653 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

Next time try Dr. Tishner's.  I used that to numb my gums before I did dental surgery on myself, using a steak knife, for an abcessed tooth.  (I really did.)

Dr Tishner's will damned near weld teeth together.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 18:55 | 3597258 seek
seek's picture

Remember, anything that actually works competes with big pharma, and we can't have that: http://www.fda.gov/ICECI/EnforcementActions/WarningLetters/2011/ucm25193...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:01 | 3596416 fiftybagger
fiftybagger's picture

Bottoms up!

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:57 | 3597005 FreeNewEnergy
FreeNewEnergy's picture

Obviously, this well-timed ZH story is an inducement for all us terrizts to START DRINKING EARLY on a long holiday weekend (I'm already on my second Vodka, OJ, cranberry and lime) so we don't get all crazy and join the March against Monsanto tomorrow or start gardens in our backyards using heirloom seeds or spread word about the collapse of retail today (Sears, Aeropostale, A&F... can't believe ZH missed that one).

B$ I get all liquored up and start talking radical, I'm going to mix another tall one, go feed the goldfish and admire my prized 2nd generation tobacco plant (the little fucker grew three inches in one day) AKA, the Tobacco plant that ate Irondequoit.

Happy Holidaze, bitchez!

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 21:02 | 3597532 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Happy holidaze to you too! I was contemplating getting into my sacred single malt scotch stash and toast all those poor idiots partaking of Methanol Margaritas or Isopropanol Planters Punch tonight at TGIFs. Hmmm Glenlivet or Oban?

Miffed;-)

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:03 | 3596425 yabyum
yabyum's picture

Anybody who eats at tgifridays desereves what they get....gives a whole new meaning to "well" drink.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:12 | 3596691 Larry Dallas
Larry Dallas's picture

The poorer middle class go there. Those who make just enough to make it just not worth it enough to go on foodstamps.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:54 | 3596816 gmrpeabody
gmrpeabody's picture

LOL.., very sad...

+1

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:04 | 3596427 maskone909
maskone909's picture

i never mix my horsemeat with carmelized rubbing alcohol.  just not good.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:04 | 3596428 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

I'll have an isopropyl 12 year with one cube. 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:45 | 3596581 The Thunder Child
The Thunder Child's picture

LMAO My monitor needed cleaning anyways....

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:41 | 3596771 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

Your "A" was pointed at your monitor?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:06 | 3596430 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

I remember when gas stations were diluting gas.  Cars would run like crap.  A few lawsuits ended that.  I am not for undue litigation but sometimes it is the only recourse organizations understand.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:34 | 3596549 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

When I was a kid (and someone else pumped your gas), the guy who ran the local gas station used to run the total to an even dollar by running it into the storm drain next to the pump. Given gas was only $0.40 a gallon back then, there's no telling how much gas he ran down the drain.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:58 | 3596628 daveO
daveO's picture

No, it hasn't stopped. 5 years ago, I got bad gas in my old, carbuerated car. I called the state and told them the gas was being watered down. They got back to me and said, "we tested it and it's alright". Then, less than a month later I read a story linked to Drudge about the same thing happening to dozens of drivers in MD, at the the same retailor (H*ss). Cost them hundreds of $ to get fixed. The company said rain water got into their storage tanks at their depot! Now, I drive out of my way to buy pure gas for all my cars and mowers. 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:07 | 3596431 Turin Turambar
Turin Turambar's picture

This is only a partial explanation.  I'm still waiting to hear where the hair in my drink came from.  On second thought, I don't want to know.  :-O

 

I'd go back for the horsemeat nachos even if alcohol wasn't served!

 

 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:12 | 3596434 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Don't mess with the booze man. If one thing will stir the masses it's messing with the liquor. The masses don't understand money supply, but they know when they are getting screwed with their drink.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:26 | 3596725 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

Another reason to be a friend of Bill's.

Adulteration is the mother milk(sold as) of banana republics.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:07 | 3596437 Craxi
Craxi's picture

What is confusing to us is why there is so much anger at such criminally dilutive operations in our every day lives, yet nobody dares to lift a finger at that uber-dilution mastermind, who literally dilutes the fiat supply (and yes, money is fungible, and yes, reserves will spill out into the broader economy sooner or later: just as soon as banks realize they can no longer make easier money in assorted rigged capital markets) to the tune of 2.5% each month, Ben Bernanke?

 

The above observation is spot on. If you have ever worked in the food business, you understand the relationship between price and value. It is the most honest/dishonest business going.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:54 | 3596615 ForWhomTheTollBuilds
ForWhomTheTollBuilds's picture

If I may add my daily plug for the book "When money dies"...

The problems we will face going forward are 10% related our money becoming worthless and 90% related to the tearing of the social fabric that results.

Ferraris and soup kitchens are two things we will be seeing a lot more of in coming years.  The idea that everything is a fake, a fraud or somehow rigged will become common knowlege and this will inform all interaction between citizens and between citizens and the state.

We never really had a firm grip on honest dealing in this culture to begin with, but it is totally slipping away now. Getting it back once we realize we don't like the results will not be as simple as losing it was. 

Wish there was some way to convince people of this, but there is no getting through.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:03 | 3596651 daveO
daveO's picture

The social fabric has already been shredded. The Scouts voted 61%(supposedly) to allow qu**rs into the scouts. Who wants to share a tent? In August 1971, when Nixon slammed shut the gold window, no one would have ever believed the Scouts would be discussing the allowance of qu**rs. This is how far the 'debasement' has evolved, in just one aspect.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:07 | 3596856 mobtown
mobtown's picture

Yes Craxi, as someone who has been in the food business for 45 years, I can tell you that going out for a nice meal ain't what it used to be. Supposed better than average restaurants are offering much smaller portions made with more inferior ingredients, for much higher prices. It's the only way to stay in business these days. Of course you need an ignorant clientele to support this. I'm done going out to dinner, pisses me off too much paying up to $100 for two, for a shitty meal.

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 17:08 | 3598764 mkkby
mkkby's picture

You and Craxi are both fucktards.  First of all, there is NO RELATIONSHIP between price and value.  Determining value takes critical thinking skills.  Price is just marketing to suckers.

You must like going to trendy places that take advantage of wanna bees by charging high prices to be "seen".  If so, don't complian because you got what you paid for.  The best meals and best value have always been at the non corporate family restaurant.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:10 | 3596446 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

So when this fake booze craze happened during prohibtion, was it really the law or the economy at fault?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:12 | 3596456 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

TGI Friday is a sad rip-off for uncouth people. Anyone who goes there deserves what they get.

Aside: A Chinese cab driver told me to be very weary of food in China. He said they die pork to make beef, etc, and thats the tip of the iceberg. He apologized, saying there are many criminals trying tricks in all walks of life there, everywhere..

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:32 | 3596540 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Did he really say weary or did you mistype? Either way, it's hilarious!

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:36 | 3596556 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

The MSG makes you sleepy.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:38 | 3596761 Jena
Jena's picture

At least the pork isn't alive.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:14 | 3596881 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

They fish for it.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:21 | 3596900 Race Car Driver
Race Car Driver's picture

.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:12 | 3596457 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

      Go to the doctor for a stomach ache after a night out at Fridays, and don't be surprised if you end up on a liver transplant list...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:12 | 3596458 the Absurd
the Absurd's picture

This is why I only drink Samuel L. Jackson Beer

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 18:17 | 3597193 AKrandy
AKrandy's picture

It'll get you DRUNK!!!

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:12 | 3596459 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

"In the EEOC complaint, which was filed by Long Island lawyers Michael Borrelli and Alexander Coleman, the bartender also claims that Hollenbach and O’Boyle ordered him to refill premium liquor bottles with cheap alcohol and “pass it off to members at premium prices.”

http://elitedaily.com/news/world/members-15000ayear-golf-club-hired-hookers-strippers/

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:13 | 3596465 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

This is the tip of the iceberg.

 

Consumer ripoffs are going to rocket as the economy sinks further into the abyss.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:14 | 3596467 Overfed
Overfed's picture

I don't always drink rubbing alcohol. But when I do, I drink it at Fridays.

Stay thirsty my friends.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:47 | 3596789 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

Of course, it had to be turned into its own meme: http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/38154617.jpg

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 17:37 | 3597100 Overfed
Overfed's picture

Service not available. I guess TGIFs didn't see the humor.

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 01:21 | 3597953 WallowaMountainMan
WallowaMountainMan's picture

gold stars for a well placed relief from scrolling to the bottom of the page.

and thanks to all those fifty+ who caught my eye.

 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:14 | 3596469 realtick
realtick's picture

swilluminati

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:17 | 3596476 q99x2
q99x2's picture

I think they would lift a finger if Bernanke entered into public without armed guards. No one wants a fool as their ChairSatan.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:18 | 3596486 youngman
youngman's picture

This is why I only drink beer..lots of it though..but just beer...gotta pee now...be back in a second...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:44 | 3596589 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

When the cans go to 10oz, the gloves come off...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 23:21 | 3597801 jumbo maverick
jumbo maverick's picture

So I'm drinking Stella Artois and thinking this is fabulous. Really tasting great. Then I look at the small print and let me tell you it's not packaged in a 12 oz bottle.

Motherfuckers ruin everything. It was a tragedy.

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 02:22 | 3597991 BeerBrewer09
BeerBrewer09's picture

fuck InBev. drink a local beer.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:18 | 3596487 bluskyes
bluskyes's picture

All I can see is a picture of Moe Szyslak

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:19 | 3596490 angel_of_joy
angel_of_joy's picture

Faking booze is the last refuge of scoundrels.

It's a sign of deep moral rot, and usually precedes society collapse.

Just ask the Russians...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:52 | 3596809 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

+1 - “They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings steal a little and they throw you in jail. Steal a lot and then they make you king.”

- B. Dylan (and S. Johnson)

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:09 | 3596494 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:23 | 3596499 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

"Product labels for rubbing alcohol include a number of warnings about the chemical, including the flammability hazards and its intended use only as a topical antiseptic and not for internal wounds or consumption. It should be used in a well-ventilated area due to inhalation hazards. Poisoning can occur from ingestion, inhalation, or consumption of rubbing alcohol."

It's a good thing smoking has been banned or a flaming Dr. Pepper could have truned into a Great White concert.  

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:09 | 3596678 daveO
daveO's picture

Isopropyl, bad. Ethyl, good. 

It's all the taxes, added to booze, that makes this possible. 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:42 | 3596768 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

Ethyltini

3.5 oz. ethyl alcohol from frickin' Joisey

1.75 oz. mixture of pineapple and orange juice

0.25 oz. grenadine

0.25 oz. "fresh" lime juice

0.25 oz. PamaTM 

shake briskly and summon coke dealer 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:49 | 3596798 WmMcK
WmMcK's picture

+1 - As a quick alternative to the last 4 ingredients:

Substitute 3.5 oz Gatorade.

Sip until buzzed and then as needed to stay at the desired level.

Gatorblades are not classy, but have the compensating benefit of easy re-mixing as the night goes on.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 18:46 | 3597234 Cobra
Cobra's picture

+1 for the Gatorade...That will help volumes as your heart thumps out of your chest for the next 16 hours.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:24 | 3596504 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

      Would you like an appetizer with your 'Hand Sanitizer' Sir?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:25 | 3596507 gamera9
gamera9's picture

Maybe it was just a test run for the dilution of the money supply, You know see how far you can take it before the public figures it out. Might as well start with the most dim witted state.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:11 | 3596682 daveO
daveO's picture

It's the other way around. Money supply dilution began 5 years ago. This is the logical conclusion. Look for TGI's to start closing.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:26 | 3596510 0b1knob
0b1knob's picture

TGIF = Thank God Its Fiat?    In Weimar Germany they sold paper clothing during the hyperinflation period.  But don't worry this type of substitution is already factored into the CPI.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:26 | 3596512 pragmatic hobo
pragmatic hobo's picture

just another in the chain of event of USA turning into China ...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:51 | 3596513 CaptainSpaulding
CaptainSpaulding's picture

Im still healing from oily rectal syndrome due to canned tuna. Now this?  Oy vey..... What next, Oregano in my Rocky patels?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:27 | 3596515 Whatta
Whatta's picture

let me guess the outcome of this...

1) Attorneys get rich(er) pursuing this

2) A few bad apple(bys) restaurants cause a wave of new laws by overzealous, out-of-control government hacks, that force good restaurant to go bankrupt enriching yet more attorneys.

3) Prices rise to the rest of us, to which the FED declares "there is no inflation".

Gawd Bless the USSA

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:27 | 3596516 scatterbrains
scatterbrains's picture

and this Yuengling I'm drinking tastes like they skipped the malted barley and went straight to rice and dextrose.. I noticed something different yesturday...   don't sue me bro just saying.

 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:48 | 3596971 aerojet
aerojet's picture

Never understood why anyone would drink Yeungling in the first place...

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 18:49 | 3597242 Cobra
Cobra's picture

Isn't that shit on par with lice shampoo?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:28 | 3596517 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Wait, but the POTUS and the Bernanke just said that "there is no inflation" < sarc off > roll the motherfucking guillotines.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:29 | 3596520 Henry Chinaski
Henry Chinaski's picture

This would explain the undrinkable glass of scotch my friend was served in Boston last fall.  Wish I could remember the name of the place. 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:29 | 3596521 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

"Is that a real poncho or a Sears poncho?"

If they had been smart enough to label it a diet or energy drink they could have sold it for $12 a shot in Southern California. Probably could have snagged a spot on Good Morning America.

 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:36 | 3596555 yabyum
yabyum's picture

God I miss Frank.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:30 | 3596531 Vince Clortho
Vince Clortho's picture

Wonder if this will put a dent in drink sales at tgif?

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:31 | 3596532 silentboom
silentboom's picture

I don't know if I buy this.  They were willing to risk their freedom, their liquor license, their franchise?  I can understand them subsituting another liquor but I completely and uttely doubt that they were willing to poison their customers!  This sounds like state propaganda at it's best.  I don't believe them, suck it!

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:39 | 3596564 whoopsing
whoopsing's picture

Someone forgot the envelope, wink wink

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:44 | 3596590 Aegelis
Aegelis's picture

"We secretly switched these people's scotch with Folger's rubbing alcohol, let's see if they notice..."

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:49 | 3596977 aerojet
aerojet's picture

Like that commercial that supposedly takes place in a restaurant where they come out and tell the customers that the steaks are from Wal Mart.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 14:47 | 3596593 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Well, what if your franchise was already on the verge of bankruptcy due to the collapse of American's with disposable income?

Almost every time in the last 10 years that I see a new restaurant open, I start the timer on their impending closure, as they have no chance of succeeding. They all hang on, empty, until whenever the loan comes due, then the trucks show up and empty the place out.

I can't imagine trying to survive these days with a multitude of TGIFs.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:16 | 3596704 daveO
daveO's picture

Years ago, I nicknamed these places 'Credit Card Restaurants'. Everytime I went to one I noticed nearly everyone paying with cards. Business and personal cards. Now, that credit's dried up, people are demanding quality. Imagine that.  

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:50 | 3596984 aerojet
aerojet's picture

There's a TGI Friday's near my house--never been in there myself, but it's always packed on the weekends.  Just can't figure it out--same with the Applebee's.  Not a damn thing on the menu worth eating, not a hot chick at the bar...

Sat, 05/25/2013 - 17:16 | 3598776 mkkby
mkkby's picture

You've never been there but somehow know who's at the bar... classic.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 17:12 | 3597046 FreeNewEnergy
FreeNewEnergy's picture

Yep, we have one of those down the street from me. Average life span is about eight months. New owners opened in June of last year. As of February, the "for lease" signs are up again. No takers at this time. Meanwhile, our brilliant town board approved a $25 million town square project which will displace merchants from their established strip mall locations and put them in the "new, improved" town square. Result will be more empty storefronts. Fuckers never learn.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 15:56 | 3596808 cynicalskeptic
cynicalskeptic's picture

Stupidity and hubris.

A) They assumed - with some reason that the typical TGIF customer couldn't tell real scotch from fake

BUT

B) They are so utterly stupid that when someone asks for a scotch 'neat' - they still give them the fake stuff'  

1) If someone asks for anything 'neat' odds are they drink it regularly and know what it tastes like  

OR

2) They are actually TAKING A SAMPLE and want it uncontaminated with any water or mixer.

 

The latter is SOP when there are complaints about booze in a place.

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:05 | 3596853 misnomer
misnomer's picture

I've worked as a waitress in many a franchise restaurant in my youth. Managers are rewarded for squeezing profits out anywhere they can.

This is totally believable, and I'm only shocked that they got caught.  It's been going on so long that I thought it was part of standard procedure to water down booze.

 

 

 

Fri, 05/24/2013 - 16:51 | 3596985 aerojet
aerojet's picture

Did you ever have to wear "flair" and quit by giving the manager the finger?

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