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Presenting CryptoKids: NSA's Future Codemakers And Codebreakers

Tyler Durden's picture


Because - "It's never too early to start thinking about what you want to be when you grow

Click image for interactive crypto/spying fun...


From Crypto Cat to Decipher Dog...


Why you should work for the NSA...


and as a gentle reminder... Why you shouldn't... (fwd to 0:46 for the quick answer)

h/t @noalpha_allbeta


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Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:22 | 3646439 PSEUDOLOGOI

half the kids are against it!

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:34 | 3646464 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

deleted by me.  fuck bernanke

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:35 | 3646481 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

Kyle Bass wants some of that action.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:36 | 3646486 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

We are the Stasi in your neighborhood, in your neighborhood, in your neighborhoooooooood!

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:39 | 3646501 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

The State is no longer benign!


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:47 | 3646526 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

The Constitution has fallen...and it can't get up

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:05 | 3646609 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

For a long time, libertarians have influenced dissociated youths with their rebellious rhetoric and nihilistic flare, but the tide has turned. Working for the government is finally cool, and this is making libertarians very worried.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:45 | 3646807 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

you need to take that bonus of yours and go on vacation with motherfucking simon black

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:23 | 3647003 angel_of_joy
angel_of_joy's picture

Yeah, working for "the Man" and against your own people must be the pinnacle of "cool" !

And then you wonder why others are calling you a retard and m0r0n...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 18:58 | 3648212 Rick Blaine
Rick Blaine's picture

No real, breathing human being can actually think that working for the government is cool.

You are obviously a troll...or an an extraterrestrial.

Wed, 07/03/2013 - 22:47 | 3720405 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

it was aliens.


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:37 | 3646488 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Tim Cook says he plans on melting them so he can....oh wait....

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:32 | 3646471 pods
pods's picture

Of course, the snitches need someone to rat out?

Snitches get stitches, Bitchez!


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:53 | 3646554 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

The Feinstein witches

bitch at the snitches

deflecting the fact

it is they it enriches

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:50 | 3646542 HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

Not nearly as cool as the "Resistance Kids".  Just sayin'

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:22 | 3646441 Dollar Bill Hiccup
Dollar Bill Hiccup's picture

A bill has just been introduced into congress to ban carrier pigeons ...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:13 | 3646942 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

You're kidding, right?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:30 | 3646442 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Where's 'Secret Squirrel' & 'Morocco Mole'?... Rocky?... Bullwinkle?... Boris & Natasha?... Madam "X"?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:30 | 3646563 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

Why not just give them a copy of Poe's Gold-Bug and tell if they can break it without a computer- they have a .gov job for life and can have more cool iCrap from Uncle Sam than their classmates in the interim?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:19 | 3646663 Creepy Lurker
Creepy Lurker's picture

Boris & Natasha run the government now...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:24 | 3646445 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Once again it is important to understand that the false flag attacks of 9/11 paved the way for these ever increasing infringements. This is why the BIG LIE of 9/11 must be exposed, regardless how many years or decades have passed.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:31 | 3646463 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

False Flag? They friggen found the guy's passport right there in the rubble (of one of the twin towers... not building 7 that came down at free fall pace without having been hit). Anyway, not sure how much more evidence you need than a passport in the middle of the rubble.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:38 | 3646482 BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

For consideration from Jon's site...good points and questions...

Could Snowden be a patsy as part of the bigger agenda and the Great Plan?


First, I’m not doubting the documents Ed Snowden has brought forward. I’m not doubting the illegal reach of the NSA in spying on Americans and the world.

But as to how this recent revelation happened, and whether Ed Snowden’s history holds up…I have questions.

Could Snowden have been given extraordinary access to classified info as part of a larger scheme? Could he be a) an honest man and yet b) a guy who was set up to do what he’s doing now?

If b) is true, then Snowden fits the bill perfectly. He wants to do what he’s doing. He isn’t lying about that. He means what he says.

Okay. Let’s look at his history as reported by The Guardian.


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:16 | 3646622 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

The big question is when he got his security clearance. He would have at least got it at the building security guard job. Security clearance + IT skills ~8 years ago in DC would have had you showered with job offers from intelligence community regardless of having a diploma or GED. Once you're in the system, you're set. There are many building security guard jobs in the DC area which anyone with a pulse can get if they know about it and they will get you a security clearance.

Actually, leaving the military because the option was open when he broke his legs makes sense. Through his friends from the military he gets a tip on the building security job. He gets that gets a clearance then somewhere along the way he has IT skills and gets in. The story line actually is very plausible to me and I've worked building security for the main State building in DC.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:18 | 3646658 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

The only thing that makes any sense right now is that 1) he was profiled as an honest guy, 2) he was given information an honest man would be likely to divulge, 3) "they" wanted this to happen, 4) if he had not divulged they would have simply tried again with someone else having a similar profile and Snowden would have just gone on with his job.

Notice, it is very much possible that Snowden was not even the first to be handed this opportunity. Any number of others might have until now simply ignored the information as business-as-usual-in-America and gone on with their assignments.

"They" wanted a test of the heat of the American people on this subject. They have been doing this for a while now, in countless small ways, turning up the heat until people get used to it and learn to turn a cynical blind eye on it.

This is 100% working for them. They are dancing in the halls right now.

The next "release" will be in about 18 months -- once again some honest joe will get his hands on something unbelievable -- and the American media and citizens will have their worst suspicions confirmed yet again that government are evil fucktards and go back to watching sports where real heros can still be found.

Boiling the frog.

Whatever we have coming now, we richly deserve.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:22 | 3646679 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

so true

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:29 | 3646709 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

The best way to control the opposition is to create the (controlled) opposition.

Just take a look at some of the revelations over the last 10-15 years about how various different "radical" groups (including several unions) from the 60's and 70's were led or controlled by the CIA and various other intelligence operations. The old tricks are still the best tricks to use.....even when they have been exposed as tricks.

The only way you can successfully lie to a group of people is if they individually and as a group already lie to themselves.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:35 | 3646750 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

I viewed the lockdown of Boston the same way. Will people even question us declaring martial law over a single criminal on the loose? Regardless of any other misgivings I have over the narrative of the Boston bombings... martial law was clearly a test.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:47 | 3646824 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

If it was not a deliberate test, then it absolutely became a test defacto.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:30 | 3646713 Bagbalm
Bagbalm's picture

Who did you say found this miraculous asbestos passport? You have a chain of custody?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:30 | 3647041 samsara
samsara's picture

Either it's a Sarc..  or it's really really a pathetic statement.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 15:10 | 3647252 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

Don't you find it just a little odd that the bodies of the people on that flight were completely incinerated at impact, and they only found bits and pieces of people who were in the building, that that passport was not rendered into its component molecules? 

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:54 | 3646540 BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

Yes Cog!


The truth to 9/11 is way bigger than the event itself...for exposing the truth of that event blows the doors right wide open to EVERYTHING 'conspiracy like.'

World Wars, Titanic, Moon Landing, terrorist attacks, Sandy Hook, documents, scriptures, whatever... Everything would be questioned.


The truth about 9/11 questions what the fuck are we exactly doing on this questions the meaning of life if you really think about it.

Its massive.


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:08 | 3646610 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Precisely. Recognizing the fundamental lie of 9/11 will force many to question every other fundamental "truth" they accept as correct. This is why 9/11 remains THE litmus test for anyone who claims to be speaking the truth on any other subject. To maintain the lie of 9/11 by not exposing it for what it is means that directly and indirectly you are maintaining all the other lies that form the basis for the BIG LIE.

One cannot proclaim 9/11 to be as it is claimed to be by the authorities even if it is done by omission, by simply not speaking (the truth) about it, and remain credible as a truth speaker. Those who claim they must not expose the 9/11 lie in order to be credible among the general population, thus more able to bring down the system from within or as a "credible" public dissident, are either controlled opposition or useful idiots. <I am speaking directly to you Ron Paul as well as many others.>

Either you speak the truth or you do not. To maintain some lies in order to expose other lies supports the system in its entirety simply because the system maintains its 'credibility' be assuring those caught up in the system that it is self correcting. And that self correcting mechanism is the partial truth speaker. Thus the real rot and decay is never exposed because the population is led to believe all that is exposed is all the rot there is when in fact it is not.  

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:10 | 3646633 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

This is a literal question: who knows what actually happened on 9/11 and is actually talking?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:19 | 3646666 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

I know, but I'm not saying.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:20 | 3646668 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

One is not required to present an (alternative) explanation of what happened on 9/11 in order to seriously and thoroughly question what happened on 9/11. I fully agree that the general population, including the so called "truth" community, does not know (exactly) what happened on 9/11.

What I do know is that the "official" version cannot withstand a casual review let alone an honest and open minded investigation. What the "official" version does do is give those who wish to believe the official narrative a reason to believe.

<Daddy, tell me another lie so that I may believe it is the truth.>

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:52 | 3646785 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

(just my stupid opinion)

There goes that funny word again to "know." Biblically sexual, legally, God knows what. (Then again, Dr. Strangelove is full of sexual overtones) Actually, legally, it's simply a trier of fact making a decision often on what we call "circumstantial" evidence. The criminal trial lawyer in me says there is an absurd and overwhelming amount of circumstantial evidence that it was an inside job. Much more evidence than a typical case that proves a murder from an angry spouse who can hide most of their actions. THis comes with the nature of the beast doesn't it? YOu can NOT pull this off without affecting physics, cameras, NORAD, Airline shorts, and a million other government and non government systems with the whole world watching. Holmes would tell us to remove all the other possibilities.

HOw many people other than Dick? Who cares at this point. The most important thing I have come to conclude about "my government" is based upon the government's reaction SINCE 911 not the day itself.

All of their behavior SINCE 911 tells me they are pretty much all co-conspirators. If the world can figure this out with very controlled and limited access to information, then they BY GOD know themselves. And if they refuse to do anything or refuse to demand an investigation, then they are accessories after the fact - plain and simple - even under the law.

What does this mean? It means, the government, and it's "laws" are pretty much gone doesn't it? The most heinous mass murder in American history and they immediately ship out the physical evidence and destroy it and errect instead constitutional "punishment" for the rest of us? Actually, they dish out literal murder and unlawful imprisonment for quite a few folks didn't they? Give me a break. What more do we need to know. And their daily behavior since only confirms and reconfirms and reconfirms...

Like the latest news, it is no longer really about three towers falling, its about three branches doing the same. 

THUS, I think it is a waste of energy to call for an investigation on such deaf and criminal ears. The remedy, like the problem will need to be much more profound.  Only then can we reopen the issue and finally bring some human justice    



Tue, 06/11/2013 - 15:31 | 3647348 mvsjcl
mvsjcl's picture

Well said, and my thoughts also.

Wed, 06/12/2013 - 04:38 | 3649348 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

The TRUTH is a 3-edged sword, ask any Vorlon...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:43 | 3646794 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

I actually agree. I do not believe the official story; I would like to know the truth. That is why I asked the question.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:52 | 3646847 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I do too. However if I remain too focused on understanding the last lie I will miss how the next one is real time this time.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:37 | 3647073 jayman21
jayman21's picture

This was some good reading on the subject.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:38 | 3646770 dtwn
dtwn's picture

I never thought I'd buy into the 9/11 'truth' business, but seeing events unfold in Syria etc has really opened my eyes.  The documentary that changed my mind regarding 9/11 was 'War by Deception' by Ry Dawson.  I think he did pretty good work for a young amateur and think he presents the arguments very well and in a logical manner.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:13 | 3646938 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

The problem any "truth" documentary has is not so much in explaining the lie, but in challenging the viewer's ideology. Belief and ideology do not require truth and fact in order to survive and flourish. Way too often truth and facts stand in direct contrast to belief and ideology. 

You can lead the ideologue to truth but you can't make them drink.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:25 | 3647016 samsara
samsara's picture

You can lead the ideologue to truth but you can't make them drink

You Can Lead a Man to Knowledge,  But You Can't Make Him Think...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:25 | 3646446 Lady Heather...UNCLE
Lady Heather...UNCLE's picture

That clip from Goodwill Hunting is just so prescient it is...just...just... MINDBLOWING

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:26 | 3646447 One And Only
One And Only's picture

I remember when kids spent their time playing baseball and shit.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:31 | 3646460 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

I used to play with a stick.  Any old stick would do.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:37 | 3646491 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

I used to play with myself, when the wife isn't around I still do.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:44 | 3646510 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

As long as those kids don't walk around with their pants hanging halfway off their asses, I'm cool with it.  Stop wearing PJ bottoms like they're real pants.  They're not.  Stop calling me "dude" or "man."  And don't even get me started on sandals.

In other words, act like you give a shit.  If you don't give a shit, then fake it. 

That's it.  I'm done.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:47 | 3646528 Big Corked Boots
Big Corked Boots's picture

+1 on the sandals part. Also flipflops and Crocs.

(but that's my hangup... sorry for sharing)

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:23 | 3647009 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

Never been to Guam?  "Zorries" (flip-flops) are standard there.  ..except the last three months I lived there, when I put on footwear only on the day I went to the airport to leave.  Miss that place.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 15:08 | 3647240 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

I wear flipflops every day and call everyone "diude" or "man" or "friend." Giving a shit is a sentient act borne out of wanting and doing the best for yourself and everyone else. Your clothes and accessories have nothing to do with it.

Your favorite well-dressed motherfuckers in suits sure don't help you fix your tire or move your furniture or water your plants or set up a fresh linux install on your dying computer. Nope that's what the Skateboarders of the world do, and we're fucking proud to be human, to be of help.

So fuck your uppity clothing styles and vernacular. There's plenty of poor, hard working people who would love to have a stranger and friend call them "dude" and it mean something rather than an empty "sir."

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 15:37 | 3647375 mvsjcl
mvsjcl's picture


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:45 | 3646513 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

you relive your childhood yet bring new meaning to the term "dodgeball"

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:45 | 3646524 Unprepared
Unprepared's picture

I once was a kid but I don't recall spending that much time shiting.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:26 | 3646449 Lady Heather...UNCLE
Lady Heather...UNCLE's picture

....and are SO right. 911 is the elephant in the room here...gotta expose that bitch of a pachyderm

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:35 | 3646473 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Sorry... It'll never happen... Because exposing that leads straight to the doorstep of what you can't even talk about or attempt to identify on ZH anymore... Go ahead ~ Say it SAY IT [like Professor Turgeson compels you to]...& hit the road Jack...


IT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS ~ Right Pure Evil?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:52 | 3646555 viahj
viahj's picture

I'll give it a go... NWO, NSA, CIA, FBI, Zionists, Bildebergers, Tri-Laterals, Luciferairans, Illumintai, Masons, Jesuits, Vatican, Neo-Cons, Neo-Libs and douche bag fascists.   the problem you have is that you always boil it down to one particular religion.  Boehner, McCain, Graham, Obama are not Jewish and those who are calling their shots are only in name. 

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:34 | 3646585 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Oh right... My bad [I forgot]


- The 'Bilderbergers', 'Tri-Lats', etc. are just 'LOGOS'... There are no 'people' involved there [what happens is that a bunch of 'stickers', 'armpatches', & printed letterhead get tossed onto seats at a roundtable for their annual meetings & conduct activities by having a seance]...

- The [non] Federal [non] Reserve doesn't have shareholder families... It's just a limestone building that prints money by itself...

- The list of "rogue states" isn't populated by only resource rich countries who don't have a 'Rothschild style' central bank tied to the petrodollar...

- Hell ~ The Rothschilds don't even exist & the Balfour Declaration is just an urban legend...

- It was the "Luciferian Anti-Defamation League" that put pressure on the Tylers in Switzerland because those genius Swss legislators found it prudent to write & codify laws to protect the rights of devil worshippers...

I'm a fucking slow learner...


Boehner, McCain, Graham, Obama... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH! Thanks for the laugh... Fucking errand boys... [Why do people hire Mexicans to cut their lawn]?...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:02 | 3646889 IamtheREALmario
IamtheREALmario's picture

Ummm ... wasn't Obama's mother jewish? If so, wouldn't that make Obummer also jewish?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:56 | 3646575 Meme Iamfurst
Meme Iamfurst's picture



OK...pure evil, so get this.

100+ years ago some English scholar is wandering around the Egyptian desert and spots this sand dune that doesn't look like any he has seen before.  He is with Oxford or one of those universities.

It is a 'dump' more than 2,000 years old.  Full of all kinds of stuff.  They excavate 1,000 boxes of stuff and take it back to England.  They have only gone thru a few boxes so far.

So among other stuff are these tniy pieces of scrolls that have been verified by Bible scholars as la-git, and they have been piecing these tiny pieces together.  Seems, 666 as EVIL, the number of the beast was transulated WRONG in every bible since the beginning.  It actually is 6616.

So go find 6616 and figure out what it is.  CODE???????

By the way,this will be in the new bible coming to print later this year as a foot note. is a quote the scholars say is la-git from Jesus. " Your Father has given you heaven, it is right before your eyes here on earth, but you don't see it and so you will destroy it"  that is a paraphase.



Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:03 | 3646601 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Yeah well you never know what'll happen next...


Last year, from Hollywood, we all LEARNED that Abraham Lincoln was actually a vampire slayer...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:26 | 3646452 navy62802
navy62802's picture

That clip from Good Will Hunting never gets old.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:44 | 3646518 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

They had me from $2.50 gas.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:29 | 3646453 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

While you're at it kids you too can learn about the value of electronic money and credit in your life:

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:35 | 3646472 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

don't forget these helpful hints:

1) Make sure you are the banker, as this will give you a reason to be by the money.

2) Place the bank behind you so no one can reach it. This will make them give you the money first.

3) Every so often, instead of putting the money in the bank, set it under you, then secretly, take it out and put it in your stash of money.

4) Roll the dice, then quickly say any number you want (without letting them see the dice) and pick up the dice quickly afterward.

5) Be creative. There are many ways to cheat, but how you carry them out is what counts.

6) Always be on the look out for other cheaters, and/or people who are looking around (so you know when to cheat)

7) Also, try to deal out the money at the beginning of the game, treat yourself to a few more twenties (above that amount will be too noticeable)

8) If you are a good cheat, following these steps, you will soon be winning every game of Monopoly.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:01 | 3646598 Meme Iamfurst
Meme Iamfurst's picture



BUT the best part of being a banker in MONOPOLY is...according to the rules on the lid", if you the banker, runs out of money, you are to take a piece of paper and write any denomination you wish on it and continue to play the game.

Sorta sounds like real life, doesn't it?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:16 | 3646654 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

When I was a kid, I always wondered WHY there was a wheelbarrow token... I don't anymore...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:30 | 3646458 pods
pods's picture

Warm and fuzzy fascism makes my day.

Stasi had nothing on us.


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:30 | 3646459 replaceme
replaceme's picture

F*ck, that's seriously creepy.  Remember kids, see something, say something.  Even if it's mommy and daddy - we love you.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:32 | 3646467 CaptainSpaulding
CaptainSpaulding's picture

I confess. I had the hots for Daphne from Scooby doo fame when i was a youngin'.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:39 | 3646499 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Too preppy for me... I preferred Veronica from the Archies... Let's do a quick poll...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:40 | 3646508 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

<== DAPHNE [from Scooby Doo]

<== VERONICA [from Archies]

Wed, 06/12/2013 - 04:47 | 3649356 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Sorry, but Velma was stacked!

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:40 | 3646504 jimmytorpedo
jimmytorpedo's picture

Who didn't?

Like we were going to be hot for Velma.

More dudes probably had the hots for Fred than Velma.

Now Marianne vs. Ginger, that's where it gets contentious.

Marianne would be way spunkyier in bed.

I don't know how I knew that when I was twelve, but I did.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:44 | 3646516 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

One word: Agent 99.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:31 | 3646721 Creepy Lurker
Creepy Lurker's picture

Not Mrs. Peel from the Avengers?

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:44 | 3646521 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

Marianne, for sure. Laverne or Shirley? Sorry

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:50 | 3646543 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Pinky Tuscadero & the Hooper Triplets...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:51 | 3646544 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Marianne, furever.  

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:53 | 3646561 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Hey ~ while we're on this meme... What we need now is a Simon Black article so he can tell us which one of the 'Mystery Date' characters he likes


I got my money on either the Scuba Diver or the Prom King...

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:42 | 3646512 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Uh, thats TMI Territory..,

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:59 | 3646577 CaptainSpaulding
CaptainSpaulding's picture

The mature Marsha brady was also one of my favorites. Thank you Miss Maureen McCormick

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:41 | 3646788 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

Nope, real question is MaryAnne or


from Giligans Island

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:32 | 3646468 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

When Crypto Cat catches Cipher Dog jacking off to a Joules amateur porn video your CryptoKid is ready to join the NSA with a salary of $150,000.  

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:35 | 3646483 docmac324
docmac324's picture

What our education system is putting out today, our kids cannot do it.


It's like all the law/police dramas on TV, that's the only justice you're goingt to get now-a-days.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:40 | 3646505 q99x2
q99x2's picture

$200,000 a year with a chance to make Diane Feinstein and Chuck Schumer's personal records including criminal treasonous acts public. Count me in.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:40 | 3646507 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Kal-el was the original Krypto-kid!

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 12:52 | 3646550 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

new terrorist lingo: the ombay is in the acksay


meanwhile a guy rides around with #1 TERRORIST on his license plate. doin' a heckuva objay!

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:04 | 3646604 VelvetHog
VelvetHog's picture

The Constitution is a living breathing document.  None of it really applies any more.  Besides, we are the government and we are here to help.  We only want what is best for The People.  What a glorious country.  The best country the world has ever known.  All hail the holy dollar.  All hail the Chief.  All hail the Bomb and the Holy Fallout!  Glory Be to Amerikkka!

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:06 | 3646605 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture

CryptoKid vs Cypherpunk?


It's like Batman vs The Joker.



Meh, more like Gumby vs The Blockheads.



Actually, it reminds me of one of my favorite quotes:

When freedom is illegal, criminals make laws and outlaws make freedom.


Claire Wolfe

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:20 | 3646985 samsara
samsara's picture

"Thru this life you'll travel,  You will meet some funny men,

Some will rob you with a six gun, some with a fountain pen.

Thru this life you'll ramble, thru this life you'll roam

You will never see an outlaw,  take a family from their home.

Pretty Boy Floyd   -  Woody Guthrie

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:05 | 3646611 Rick Blaine
Rick Blaine's picture

Jesus...I thought this was a joke at first...

I'm looking at the webpage now.

This is the creepiest shit I've ever seen.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:23 | 3646683 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

what's even creepier is imagining the strategy meetings that gave birth to this idea.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:33 | 3646729 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

Oh I would dearly love to have sat in on any of those. I think these punks are running scared. See my post directly below.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:16 | 3646964 samsara
samsara's picture

Imagine the Images that they did just for fun between them that were never put up on the server

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:33 | 3646736 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Then there's the bill for said meetings that we all paid.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 15:27 | 3647326 rustymason
rustymason's picture

The government schools have been training our children for this new world for quite awhile. This NSA Kids and the "See something, say something" campaigns are part of a continuum of brainwashing that has been going for decades, starting with Carter's Department of Education, Goals 2000, and continuing up through No Child Left Behind, the current U.S. implementation of UNESCO.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:51 | 3646841 Winston Smith 2009
Winston Smith 2009's picture

"This is the creepiest shit I've ever seen."

It was even creepier back before they dropped the "Inform on your parents" icon.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 18:50 | 3648185 Rick Blaine
Rick Blaine's picture

I really can't describe this shit.

It's like some weird Orwellian (or something) propaganda from The Wall.

It would be one thing if this was for the EPA or something (and maybe there is something similar for the EPA)...but the NSA???

I'm bringing this to the attention of every person I know.

I can't believe there are only 107 comments on this post.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:28 | 3646702 Random_Robert
Random_Robert's picture

"National Security":

The process of denying the individual their right to their personal privacy in order to maintain the State's right to its own privacy (aka  "secrecy").

Privacy and Liberty are so tighly intertwined that all of humanity had better quickly get their brains wrapped around the fact that the State has NO right to secrecy.... 


We elect Representatives, and they appoint unelected "specialists" to maintain secrecy and then sugar coat it with such platitudes as:

"YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH, so go back to watching American Idol and thinking about whose ass needs to be kissed at the office in order to lock down next year's 1.5% merit increase"

The NSA is Constitutionally illegal.  The State's secrets do not rise above due process of law-

The fucking NSA is a willful violation of the 4th Amendment- WE are entitled to be secure in our homes, papers and affairs... NOT the Federal Government.

This is all REGARDLESS of whether we are operating under the Emergency War Powers Act, the Patriot Act, or the COG clauses...


Here's the other thing:

The ONLY people on Earth who rise to the intellectual level required to break most modern algorithms are also far down the spectrum.

It's only a matter of time until Psychology realizes that the only difference between Autism/Aspergers and neural psychopathy  is that psycopaths all like to be "in charge"; while the autistic have no grasp on the concept of hierarchical authority... and thus do their tasks for the psychopaths with no dure regard for the downstream consequences of their actions...

Meanwhile, the fucking people who just want to be left the fuck alone and to pursue thier own self-interest will continue to be identified as the targets of "justified aggression"

I'm going back to digging my hole.






Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:30 | 3646716 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

What this website suggests to me is that actually the NSA is in a terrible bind.

There are probably too few technology job applicants applying for NSA jobs who can pass a security background check.

Look what should be happening. NSA should be able to go to any large college, recruit talent right out of classrooms (fuck waiting for graduation) but they can't. Why can't they? Because most students taking technology courses now are natives of India and China. Both of which countries are significant targets of NSA cybersnooping activity, or sources for info-warfare and corporate espionage directed at US targets'.

I think the Homeland Security information warfare service must be on the verge of starvation.

Even if so it doesn't mean any of us can relax. A wounded viper can still kill you. But I suspect they are going to start to lose more battles than they can win some ways down the road.

And if you have children and you don't mind having them spy on your email messages later, directing them into a career in "information services" might support you in your old age.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:50 | 3646838 Winston Smith 2009
Winston Smith 2009's picture

"Because most students taking technology courses now are natives of India and China. Both of which countries are significant targets of NSA cybersnooping activity, or sources for info-warfare and corporate espionage directed at US targets'."

Good points.  H1B visas won't do for TS security clearances.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 13:32 | 3646727 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

Millennials.  Everyone has to win and receive recognition every day.


That might be the underlying driver of MR high end HongKong Hotel.

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:20 | 3646991 ross81
ross81's picture

up yours, children!

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 14:59 | 3647190 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

Don't forget to enter our essay contest for a chance to win a free trip to Disneyland.

In 250 words or less tell us "What my parents think of the NSA". Be sure to include their full names and Social Security numbers.


Tue, 06/11/2013 - 15:23 | 3647312 rustymason
rustymason's picture

"Training Obama's Willing Executioners for Tomorrow."

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 15:30 | 3647339 rustymason
rustymason's picture

Dear Mr. Snowden,

How much is each member of Congress really worth, where exactly did the million$ (billion$ ?) come from, and where do they keep it all?

Thank you,

Concerned Citizens

Tue, 06/11/2013 - 16:14 | 3647541 Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

Kool-Aid commercial - disco? (0:31)

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!