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The Cyprus Bail-In Blows Up: President Urges Complete Bailout Overhaul (Full Letter)

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Cyprus' President Nicos Anastasiades has realized (as we warned), too late it seems for the thousands of domestic and foreign depositors who were sacrificed at the alter of monetary union, that the TROIKA's terms are "too onerous." Anastasiades has asked EU lenders to unwind the complex restructuring and partial merger of its two largest banks leaving EU officials "puzzled", according to a letter the FT has uncovered, as "essentially, he is asking for a complete reversal of the program." The EU officials claim that the failure to prepare for the bailout’s impact was partially the fault of Mr Anastasiades’ government, which voted down a first agreed rescue before succumbing to a similar deal nine days later.

The FT goes on to note that although the letter does not request it explicitly, Mr Anastasiades is in effect asking for further eurozone loans on top of the existing EUR10bn sovereign bailout – something specifically ruled out by a German-led group of countries at the time. The return of beggars-can-be-choosers we presume - or just token gestures to recover some populist support as the enemy of my enemy is my friend.

As we noted here (and on the chart below), it seemed pretty obvious where this was going to end - obvious that is to everyone except Europe's victory-claiming politicians.

It seems the ongoing flood of capital (despite controls) and collapse of the economy that we discussed here is occurring at ever increasing pace - and demanding even more gold be sucked out of their vaults...

"Unless Cyprus implements some controls that truly work, at this pace its entire banking system will be completely deposit-free in under one year. And it will need to sell much more than all its gold to continue keeping the Troika happy and in compliance with all the future (because there will be many more) bailouts."

In other words, anyone who has been paying attention to the facts on the ground, in this case represented by the record April collapse in deposits (during a capital-controlled month!), would be well aware of the inevitability of this happening; and that in a continent in which the link between the banking sector and the sovereign is stronger than an umbilical, it was only a matter of weeks or most months before Cyprus pulled an Oilver Twist once again.

Via The FT,

Cyprus’ president has asked eurozone leaders for a complete revamp of his country’s €10bn bailout, warning Nicosia may not be able to meet the rescue’s current terms because it has harmed the country’s economy and banking system even more than expected.

 

...

 

“[T]he economy is driven into a deep recession, leading to a further rise in unemployment and making fiscal consolidation all the more difficult,” Mr Anastasiades wrote to the heads of three EU institutions and the International Monetary Fund.

 

“I urge you to review the possibilities in order to determine a viable prospect for Cyprus and its people.”

 

...

 

A senior eurozone official directly involved in the Cypriot talks said EU officials were “puzzled” by the letter

 

...

 

Essentially, he is asking for a complete reversal of the programme,” the official said, adding that the failure to prepare for the bailout’s impact was partially the fault of Mr Anastasiades’ government

 

...

 

Although the letter does not request it explicitly, Mr Anastasiades is in effect asking for further eurozone loans on top of the existing €10bn sovereign bailout – something specifically ruled out by a German-led group of countries at the time.

No explicit M.A.D. "we'll leave the Euro" threats aside from the implicit view that this is not a viable path for his people.

Finally, when bailing out ungrateful European insolvent nations (who voted on the terms of the onerous bailout through their own government precisely two months ago), can Europe next time makre sure they get the memo to not make a ruckus before the critical reelection of Europe's de facto viceroy, Angie Merkel?

 

Full Letter below (via Open Europe):

I am writing to update you on the economic and banking system developments in Cyprus following the Eurogroup decisions of last March and to request your support regarding a number of very pressing issues which need to be addressed the soonest.

1. The Cypriot economy is adapting to major shocks

The Cypriot economy is adapting to major shocks. Substantial private wealth has been lost and a significant number of Cypriot firms have lost their working capital at the two systemically important financial institutions which were subject to the bail - in. Restrictive measures, including capital controls, are seriously hampering the conduct of business and confidence in the banking system has been shaken. As a result the economy is driven into a deep recession, leading to a further rise in unemployment and making fiscal consolidation all the more difficult.

2. Application of bail-in was implemented without careful preparation

It is my humble submission that the bail-in was implemented without careful preparation. Its form was changed drastically within a week. Originally designed as a general bail-in across the banking system, it eventually became focused on the two distressed banks, the Laiki Bank and the Bank of Cyprus (BOC). There was no clear understanding of how a bail-in was to be implemented, legal issues are being raised and major delays in completing the process are being observed. Moreover, no distinction was made between long-term deposits earning high returns and money flowing through current accounts, such as firms' working capital. This amounted to a significant loss of working capital for businesses. An alternative, Ionger-term, downsizing of the banking system away from publicity and without bank-runs was a credible alternative that would not have produced such a deep recession and loss of confidence in the banking system.

3. Cyprus was forced to pay the cost to ring-fence Greece but no reciprocity has been granted

Another feature of the current solution was that deposits at the branches of Laiki and Bank of Cyprus in Greece were spared from a haircut to prevent contagion. These deposits amounted to €15 billion. The wish to avoid contagion to Greece was also evident in the Eurogroup's insistence that Cypriot banks sell their Greek branches. In addition and as a result of the sale, the Cypriot banks have lost their Greek deferred tax assets. As understandable as ring-fencing may be, this was absent at the time of deciding the Greek PSI in relation to the Greek Government Bonds which cost Cyprus 25% of its GDP (€4.5 billion). The heavy burden placed on Cyprus by the restructuring of Greek debt was not taken into consideration when it was Cyprus' turn to seek help.
4. Imposition of Laiki's ELA liability to Bank of Cyprus

The implementation of the sale of the Greek branches of the Cypriot banks, as urged by the Eurogroup, resulted in Laiki selling assets that were pledged against its ELA liability to Piraeus Bank, without Piraeus assuming the corresponding ELA liability. As such, Laiki was left with the related ELA liability but without the aforementioned assets. The ELA liability which was left "unsecured" as a result of the sale amounts to around €3.8 billion and was imposed on Bank of Cyprus as a result of the Eurogroup decision. It is worth reminding that a substantial part (in excess of €4 billion) of Laiki's ELA liability was required in the first place in order to cover deposit outflows experienced by Laiki's Greek branches.

Bank of Cyprus itself has a total ELA liability of around €2 billion. By taking an additional €9 billion from Laiki, which was accumulated over the course of the last year under very questionable circumstances, BOC has substantially increased the vulnerability of its own funding structure, with its cumulative ELA liability reaching a very high €11 billion. BOC was called to pledge its own assets to cover for the collateral shortfall for the €3.8 billion liability carried over by Laiki. Such a high amount of ELA liability hinders BOC's funding sources as the room for obtaining additional ELA is limited. The imposition of Laiki's ELA liability on Bank of Cyprus is the main contributor to the liquidity strain Bank of Cyprus faces.

5. Urgent need for Troika to provide a long-term sustainable and viable solution to the liquidity issues Bank of Cyprus is facing as a result of the Eurogroup decisions

Instead of addressing the issue of severe liquidity strain on Cyprus' mega-systemic bank through a long-term sustainable and viable solution, the Troika partners seem to have chosen the path of maintaining strict capital restrictions. Artificial measures such as capital restrictions may seem to prevent a bank run in the short term but will only aggravate the depositors the longer they persist. Rather than creating confidence in the banking system they are eroding it by the day. Maintaining capital restrictions for a long period will inevitably have devastating effects on the local economy, will also affect the country's international business and will have an adverse impact on GDP. Under such scenarios spill over effects will no doubt register on other local banks through higher non-performing loans as a result of dampened economic activity. In addition, increased deposit withdrawals from other local banks, as fear of lack of liquidity of the only systemic bank will have a domino effect on the entire banking system.

I stress the systemic importance of BOC, not only in terms of the banking system but also for the entire economy. The success of the programme approved by the Eurogroup and the Troika depends upon the emergence of a strong and viable BOC. It is for this reason that I urge you to support a long-term solution to Bank of Cyprus' thin liquidity position. Such a solution will re-instate depositor confidence in the banking system and will allow the full functioning of the economy away from restrictive measures and capital controls. It will also facilitate the attraction of foreign direct investment in Cyprus.

My Finance Minister has alerted the Troika Mission Chiefs in writing on 19 May 2013, in relation to the need to implement a long-term viable solution to Bank of Cyprus' liquidity position. No response has been received yet.

A possible long-term solution could be the conversion of part of Laiki's ELA liability into long term bonds and the transfer of these bonds and corresponding assets into a separate vehicle. Another solution could be the reversal of the Eurogroup decision in relation to the merger of Good Laiki (carrying the €9 billion ELA liability) into Bank of Cyprus. In any case the BOC should exit resolution status without any further delays and should be granted eligible counter-party status by the ECB. Of course more options need to be examined. I should mention that an interim Board and an interim CEO is already in place at BOC and the final asset valuation is progressing according to schedule.

I urge you to review the possibilities in order to determine a viable prospect for Cyprus and its people. The new government of Cyprus, despite its expressed disagreements, has abided by the Eurozone decisions and remains determined to implement the programme fully and effectively. I am personally determined to lead Cyprus out of this dire situation and towards a path of sustainable growth and development. We are also fully committed to re-establishing Cyprus's stance as a credible EU partner. However, at this crucial juncture, we are calling upon you for active and tangible support.

 

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Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:21 | 3668475 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

The Troika was playing for time anyway.  Do what you gotta do, but do it NOW, you naive Troika-serving schmucks!

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:23 | 3668493 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Cant...allow....first.....domino...to....drop......

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:43 | 3668580 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

In other words; "What?  Fuck me? no no no, fuck you."

So many paper fucking promises,

so little assets or collateral of real value.

Time for the world to "go to the matresses" and sort this out.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:48 | 3668601 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

Don't worry LoP ,homo sapiens will be going to the dirt mattress soon enough

at the current rate.

That body language at the G8 meet. Just as well Putin had his shirt on otherwise

he would have kicked Obozo to death.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:57 | 3668631 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

So true, I have done business with the russians for a long time now.  Good people, love their "cut to the chase" approach, but what else would one expect from a society that understands "bread and circuses" very well and has lived through the collapse of a union that was a superpower.  America's demise is really not that different.

Wed, 06/19/2013 - 02:50 | 3670561 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

I am not being (or about to be) coy, but is it possible - is it actually possible - I mean, did it really happen in real life - that Mr. Anastasiades, et al., actually expected some other outcome? What I am trying to say (or ask) is that li'l ol' me, utterly bereft of  military and security and intelligence apparatus and diplomatic and financial contacts galore (such as the government of Cyprus has, one must assume) knew that this was going to happen (in fact, I'm kinda surprised that the fallout has been so mild, frankly) based on nothing more than the collective wisdom available on this stupid, time consuming web site ...

But the government of Cyprus was somehow taken unawares?

That cannot possibly be true.

Oh, I forgot to mention ... I'm not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:57 | 3668632 BurningFuld
BurningFuld's picture

Hey Cyprus, welcome to going bankrupt. Maybe call up Detroit for some pointers.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:58 | 3668641 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Pensioners and account holders in California, the next to be "cyprussed" - one can be optimistic anyway...

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:58 | 3668639 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

today they said that 1 in 40 Belgians is a dollar millionair. And that's just the suckers who keep their money in the bank...
Plenty more to steal over here with their bail ins :)

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 14:47 | 3669056 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

If you have a million in the bank you aren't a millionaire - you're somebody's bitch.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:44 | 3668587 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

better idea....superman towels...hi five

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:34 | 3668549 chubbar
chubbar's picture

The Troika is playing for gold, not time. This has only one ending but the job of the elite is to completely disarm all nations of their only means to stay sovereign after the reset. The leadership in the U.S. is doing that via gold suppression sales as well as making sure the banks stay well funded as the rest of the economy does a slow default (slow default so citizens and companies sell assets first to try and stay afloat). The european elites are just making sure that each country slowly defaults after first pledging all available assets, especially gold. It shouldn't be too hard to understand the end game.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 14:09 | 3668924 PTR
PTR's picture

Dude, I totally bookmarked you post.  I'm going to be watching to see how all this unfolds...

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:22 | 3668485 Midasking
Midasking's picture

Just mint everyone a trillion dollar coin that must be deposited into Cyprus banks.. problem solved. Next.... http://tinyurl.com/mem7o7x

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:23 | 3668492 Mongo
Mongo's picture

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:25 | 3668494 knukles
knukles's picture

It used to be said in Europe about the time of WWII that "The Americans do everything right, after they've tried everything else first." or some such meandering truism.
Well my friends, methinks it's time that the EU be officially blessed with said stigmata.

Maybe the whole problem is that it's all just fucked beyond repair, anyhow.
Where be my Obiephone?

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:30 | 3668530 Big Corked Boots
Big Corked Boots's picture

"The genius of you Americans is that you never make clear-cut stupid moves, only complicated stupid moves which make the rest of us wonder at the possibility that we might be missing something."

- Gamal Abdel Nasser

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:52 | 3668615 SpiceMustFlow
SpiceMustFlow's picture

fucking great quote

 

Wed, 06/19/2013 - 02:55 | 3670564 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

Statesmen from generations ago ...

Even when they were spectacularly wrong, they were more edifying than those of today.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:01 | 3668653 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

hahahahahaha damn that is so right!

to bad there's no quote for us Europeans as we just don't make moves at all...
wait for it... wait for it a bit longer.... yawn.... wait for it.... OH ANOTHER PROBLEM!!! let's forget the first one ever existed!

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:45 | 3668589 asscannon101
asscannon101's picture

I've also heard before; 'When God wants to punish Americans, he sends them tornadoes and hurricanes. When God wants to punish anyone else, he sends them Americans.'

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:25 | 3668506 Navymugsy
Navymugsy's picture

What the fuck did they expect? They could have manned up in March and ditched the Euro but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, they had to fold. Too late Mr. A. The jig is up and the EU owns you! The banking crisis was worse than expected... Ya fucking think? Now that all of your cronies got their money out I guess it's time to beg for more. I can't wait to get back to Limassol and hear my neighbors tell me what a brave man Anastisiades is.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:54 | 3668621 flacon
flacon's picture

I lived 11 years in Limassol. 

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:03 | 3668665 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

GIVE ME ALL YOUR MONEY OR I'LL SHOOT MYSELF!!!
HERE'S A WARNING SHOT................................................

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:26 | 3668515 Yardfarmer
Yardfarmer's picture

is this hopelesss clusterfuck the new normal?

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:48 | 3668600 knukles
knukles's picture

Yes

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 14:20 | 3668970 thisandthat
thisandthat's picture

Question:

is this hopelesss clusterfuck the new normal?

Answer:

  1. Yes.
  2. Yes.
  3. All the above.
Wed, 06/19/2013 - 03:00 | 3670566 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

I prefer the philosophical approach of Orientals to matters concerning the human affair:

 

Answer:

1. Yes;

2. No;

3. Both the above; AND,

4. Neither of the above.

 

Gives one a little more wriggle room, too.

Wed, 06/19/2013 - 03:02 | 3670568 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

Did you know that Microsoft actually attaches four different states to the following:

 

(I can only explain three of them, but on page 87,465,934 of the Microsoft Knowledge Database, it is explained that the fourth is a feature, not a bug.)

Wed, 06/19/2013 - 16:52 | 3673064 thisandthat
thisandthat's picture

Feature, not a bug, explains the current situation perfectly well...

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:28 | 3668523 Truther
Truther's picture

You want your money back? give me your wife or bend over first. Bitchez.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:28 | 3668524 Father Lucifer
Father Lucifer's picture

 

 

Rings upon your fingers
Bells upon your toes
Ev'ry day's a game of chance
Ev'ry body knows
In the king's apartment
Heavy lies the crown
There must be a thousand ways
To bring that castle down

Wave the mighty dollar
Make us live again
Lead and we will follow
Faithful to the end
Wave the mighty dollar
Pave the streets with gold
Lead us by the collar
All our dreams are sold

Rings upon your finger
Stardust in your hair
Jumping through that wall of fire
All for the market share
In the king's apartment
Desperate human greed
Try to find a diff'rent way
Satisfy that need

Wave the mighty dollar
Make us live again
Lead and we will follow
Faithful to the end
Wave the mighty dollar
Pave the streets with gold
Lead us by the collar
All our dreams are sold

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:30 | 3668528 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

There is only one way to reverse it, LEAVE THE EU ASSHOLES or bend over, take it like a man and stop complaining.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:30 | 3668533 WarHorse
WarHorse's picture

Who will be first to leave the EURO?

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:57 | 3668878 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

Deutschland?

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:31 | 3668535 jubber
jubber's picture

Euro still over 1:34  ?

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:31 | 3668537 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

It's a little late to withdraw consent when their cock is already up your ass.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:05 | 3668676 flacon
flacon's picture

It's the ejaculation that counts. 

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:34 | 3668545 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

In some related news....

A £1.5bn "bail in" plan to rescue the  Co-operative Bank could cost pensioners big

http://uk.finance.yahoo.com/news/pensioners-face-huge-losses-co-20532384...

 

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:34 | 3668547 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

This fucker just awaken from a long nap?

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:37 | 3668551 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

we're sorry.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:35 | 3668552 Inthemix96
Inthemix96's picture

I heard the 'O' on the radio today at work kids, he is over here at the G8 with the rest of the circus clown show lot of ours.

How the fuck do you lot take him seriously?  He even SOUNDS disingenious on the fucking radio, he knows we know hes lying.

I mean this is the nicest possible way mind, even camoron sounds plausible which hes not, against your supreme leader.  He comes across as a fucking idiot in my opinion.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:45 | 3668590 reload
reload's picture

I can hardly bear to listen to ANY of them these days. But today I caught a clip of Cammeron and Osbourne banging on about tax havens, avoidance schemes and FAIRNESS. It is a matter of public record that both these individuals and their families (Milliband brothers also)have used trusts and offshore domiciles to transfer wealth from generation to generation - perfectly legally of course, with the intended and achieved outcome of avoiding inheritance tax. Why do `journalists`not drill into that and ask why what is FAIR for them is different from what is FAIR to everybody else.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:50 | 3668611 ekm
ekm's picture

Typical distraction tactics

Offshore havens, gay marriage etc.

 

None of those affects the real economy.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 14:10 | 3668926 pods
pods's picture

Yep, how about a question like this:

Why does the government still allow fractional reserve lending when everyone knows it is an exponential funciton that blows up eventually?

pods

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 20:04 | 3669776 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

Yeah, the distractions and the sheeple's swallowing it like some Jim Jones Kool-aid is my favorite part of it all.

"Go ahead and bend me over the couch and take my kids to kill and be killed, but God forbid some gay people want to marry and some woman wants an abortion."

I do NOT have an opinion about those two issues one way or the other, but am just asking if those things should be a PRIORITY right now.

Or put another way, does gay marriage or your neighbor's abortion matter much when you are behind barbed wire or waiting your "turn" while staring into a trench in the middle of some forest?!

Let's deal with the criminals of government and their bankster masters first before they deal with us.

The Four Rs:

Rejection--No pay, no obey.

Revolution--They're preparing for it, you should be as well. See NDAA 2012/2013/2014, ect.

Retribution--We will know who and what these sociopaths are guilty of, and is their really any place for the likes of them in a restored Constitutional and civil society?!

Restoration--Restore the Constitutional republic.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:00 | 3668645 Inthemix96
Inthemix96's picture

They dont give a fuck mate, you know this though, they think they are above the likes of us while spewing fucking bile and gobshite platitudes to the masses to turn us all against one an other.

But they be scared as they see it doesnt work anymore.  They know we know they are raping the public purse for them and their friends while expecting you and me to live on fifty three fucking quid a week.  They are now reduced to outright bullshit and scape goating to get us all riled up.

GCHQ and NSA let them know from 96, we dont believe them and it doesnt work.  You want to hear the discusions I have with customers, friends, neighbours every fucking day of the week mate, people are rightly pissed off and are well aware of whats going on.  They now pull this stunt of arming the Taliban and trying to get public opinion on side for an attack on the soveriegn nation of Syria?  No fucking chance, we have had enough mate, its just kicked off in Brazil.  When it kicks off here it will be biblical, the English are one of the worst nations on earth when you rile them up.

Best to you and yours reload.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:18 | 3668728 reload
reload's picture

Cheers. The only prolonged and heartfelt `uprising` that I can remember is the Miners strike. And it did not work out too well for them despite having a lot of support from the average working man. What happened was their communities were divided and gutted, their jobs exported, many of them criminalized and some imprisoned. Years later we can see there was NO net gain for the country as a whole and we have in fact lost our energy security, partially as a result of closing some productive mines. Today we ship coal
in from Canada and Oz at a higher price than we could have been producing it at home. The only good news is that it IS still there.

There is another dynamic in play today which makes the government feel very safe, for now. In only a few years time 1/2 the males in the UK under the age of 25 will be Muslims. Divide and rule will be the name of the game as ever - just advantage one group at the expense of another with periodic switches to keep a lid on things. To be honest I think we have more chance of ending up with our own Ayatollah than a government of patriotic, honest, hard working and humble British citizens.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 19:56 | 3669751 CaptainObvious
CaptainObvious's picture

If I hear one of these cunts bandy about the word "fairness" or "fair share" another time, I'm going to projectile vomit blood. 

This reminds me of the line from Atlas Shrugged:

"From each according to their ability, to each according to their need."

The problem comes when there are more lazy, slacking needers than able-bodied producers.  Eventually the able-bodied producers are transformed into needers, or, as Margaret Thatcher once said, "The problem with socialism is eventually you run out of other people's money." 

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:50 | 3668610 knukles
knukles's picture

Most people don't.
Even the ones who voted against the other guy(s)

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:08 | 3669120 Global Douche
Global Douche's picture

We generally don't, except for those Americans who remain on the government teet. Probably the best political cartoon I've seen is The "O" saying to the skeleton cow called the US Treasury "Good morning, sunshine" and having so many milk pails. The cow was ready to faint and had no more meat on the bones. This was maybe two years ago. It clearly deserved headlines, but Rome continues to burn.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:36 | 3668558 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

It's too late to ask for your viginity back after the deed is done.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:39 | 3668568 Non Passaran
Non Passaran's picture

Merkel: "Let's talk about it, but after the elections"

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:42 | 3668573 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

keep withdrawing my friends

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:45 | 3668833 THX 1178
THX 1178's picture

from financial institutions? Done.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 19:58 | 3669754 CaptainObvious
CaptainObvious's picture

Done.  Way back on March 17.  They want to keep 60% of $30, let 'em have it.  Fuckers.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:47 | 3668593 Never One Roach
Never One Roach's picture

Dear Mutter und Fater,

 

Send moar cash, bitte.

 

Du Kind,

Nikos Akroplis Klytemnestra

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:47 | 3668597 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

he who panics first wins

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:51 | 3668612 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

Some time ago it was suggested that Cyprus countrrattack by uing the confscated bank deposits to put in a gargantuan order for physicl silver. This could have set the cat amongst the pigeons and sent everyone scurrying for cover.

Before their deposit base disappears they might want to try it. It is a cold hard world and unless they act for thmselves no one is going to listen to their lament.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:53 | 3668620 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Post all debt with Bubble Bernanke and the PhD bankster Fed. They'll make all debt disappear with fantasy accounting.

As soon as they register it, "It's gone"

What happened to that 9 trillion on the Fed's balance sheeeet? "It's gone!"

 

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:07 | 3668647 Dr. No
Dr. No's picture

Carrying Treasuries on the FEDs balance sheet is a accounting gimmick only.  It is used to shuck the rubes.  With a printing press available, balance sheets dont mean anything.

 

Lew (on the phone): "You know Ben, we cant cover the interest payment anymore.  In fact, there is very little appetite to pay the principal.

The Bernak: "You cant do that!  You promised!!"

Lew: ..click...

The Bernak: "We are ruined!! We are broke!! we are bankrupt!  All of our assets are now worthless!! What will we do??"

Dudley: (Trips over a printing press as he is trying to get out of the way of Ben's panic arm waving), "Wait, what is this?  I got an idea!!"

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:01 | 3668633 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

What a fucking moron.

I feel sorry for the people of Cyprus. But he is their Vichy Troika moron.

THE RAPE OF THE DEPOSITORS

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:42 | 3668818 Nue
Nue's picture

Amazing how Christine Lagarde is the most masculine looking person in that picture.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:47 | 3668838 THX 1178
THX 1178's picture

Isn't that Bernanke in the pink toga on the bottom right? Looks like he let his beard grow a little. Looks like hes about to get his comeuppance.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:57 | 3669214 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

I thought that was Charlie Watts.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:31 | 3669161 Kiss My Iceland...
Kiss My Icelandic Ass's picture

 

 

Eat cake, bitchez !

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 12:58 | 3668643 grid-b-gone
grid-b-gone's picture

I guess withdrawal contagion has not abated. Can't have the masses pulling away from instruments of control like banks, annuities, 401ks, insurance in general, pensions, any long-term promise with a front-loaded benefit to the seller exchanged for a simple future promise with no clawback provision. Damn, that Cyprus thing woke some of the lazy, complacent human fodder cash cow heard.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:01 | 3668652 Bam_Man
Bam_Man's picture

Yeah, Cyprus has discovered that it sucks being a Euro-vassal state.

You had your chance to leave and blew it. Now shut up and do as you're told.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:02 | 3668658 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

     "Summer breeze makes me feel fine..." 

   All the Greeks and Cypriots don't have anyone to fleece this summer. (stupid € lovers)

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:08 | 3668695 vote_libertaria...
vote_libertarian_party's picture

So, just to clarify, if you lock the bank doors and prevent people from getting their money they may not spend said money?

 

Wow, who could have seen that result???

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:14 | 3668715 horot
horot's picture

So, the cypriots will be required to sell all of their gold. Then I better start prepping to back up the truck.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:21 | 3668735 terex
terex's picture

Joke a la Berlin-Brussels style; Let bonddholders of GGBs take a haircut but not ECB, i.e. Cyprus takes a hit of 5 Bn and crashes it's banks and their already crashed economy. Then when cleaning up; let the CyprIdiots fot the bil one more time by stealing their (and other's) money and their future as a eastern-Europe finance hub... Then put the CyprIdiot asses in a deep hole of dept that make even greece look like sunshine considering that both money and future has moved to Brussels or Frankfurt and just D E B T remains.

*-)))))))))))))))))

Oh my, how Ilove the smell of a fat freaky badass joke in the morning

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:56 | 3669205 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

Smells like...feudalism.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 19:21 | 3669654 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

blokes, they're trying to hood-squank us!

(this really is a handy word)

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:47 | 3668839 jtlien
jtlien's picture

Traitors remorse?

 

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 13:51 | 3668852 XRAYD
XRAYD's picture

European Central Bank President Mario Draghi said the central bank is considering further non-standard monetary policy tools and will deploy them if circumstances warrant. ...

 

Sure, gold standard to no standard! (No bit-coins, though!)

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 14:10 | 3668928 diana_in_spain
diana_in_spain's picture

Can someone tell me why the euros is going up so much against the US dollar lately?

Wed, 06/19/2013 - 03:09 | 3670569 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

Yes, but then we'd have to kill you.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 14:32 | 3669015 smacker
smacker's picture

There's no way the EU/Troika will renegotiate the Cyprus bail-out ..................until after Merkel's re-election.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 14:55 | 3669082 WTFUD
WTFUD's picture

4000+ forces with notice of Job loss in UK. Must be pretty pissed!!

I don't want no Steekin ObamaPhoney
I wants me a CamboRecorder.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:25 | 3669143 youngman
youngman's picture

Cyprus' President Nicos Anastasiades .....I think he just found out he lost his pension in this deal....

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:51 | 3669191 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

"Again, things that would have been good know yesterday."

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:52 | 3669197 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

Act in haste, repent in...

 

I forgot.  In Europe, you are required to act in haste and not allowed to repent.  Ever.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:56 | 3669208 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

Shut up, you stupid serf.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 17:10 | 3669419 MeelionDollerBogus
Tue, 06/18/2013 - 15:58 | 3669217 NoTTD
NoTTD's picture

Troika:  "What can I say?  You fucked up.  You trusted us."

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 16:55 | 3669373 Super Broccoli
Super Broccoli's picture

damn so ruining your economy doesn't financialy work out ???

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 19:38 | 3669686 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

He is trying to spin a story to save his head knowing that some day soon the citizens will come for heads to adorn their pikes, or whatever pikes are called in Cyprus. I estimate that soon he will be moving to Germany or Russia to avoid becoming an ornament or retribution.

Tue, 06/18/2013 - 22:17 | 3670204 Trampy
Trampy's picture

Why doesn't he just come out and say that they threatened to kill him unless he did as told? 

Wed, 06/19/2013 - 19:32 | 3673602 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

No wonder it confused the fuck out of them.

It was the actual goddamned truth.

How about that.

Euronazis don't know how to react to truth except to stomp it.

Since they already stomped on Cyprus they can't understand how this has come back like an armored, radiation-proof cockroach.

Currently they are now looking at upgrades for their jackboots to kill this particular brand of truth-speaking courage.

Wed, 06/19/2013 - 19:41 | 3673621 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

BerSquanked (v): the act of being exposed to the vile utterings of a squank but unlike any regular squank, one of the chief globalist squanks.

(squank (n) : squawking wanker, http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2013-06-18/sec-uses-hft-firm-designed-tool-find-hft-doesnt-cause-flash-crashes#comment-3669522)

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