The Most Miserable States

Tyler Durden's picture

While arguments will likely flare over just how 'miserable' the occupants of Louisiana are relative to those of Minnesota, based on Bloomberg's quantification of 'misery' these two states are the most and least miserable in our Union. Based on thirteen factors, ranging from child poverty rates to pollution, income inequality, and mental health it seems New Mexico and West Virginia are moving up the most miserable ranks most rapidly year over year.

(Click image for huge legible version)


Via Bloomberg:

Thirteen variables from the United Health Foundation's America's Health Rankings were isolated to determine each state's Misery Score. For each variable, the state with the maximum misery value received 100 points, while the state with the minimum value received zero points. All other states received points in proportion to where their values fell between the two extremes. Each state's 13 scores were then averaged for a final Misery Score. A higher score indicates greater misery.


  • Air pollution levels refer to micrograms of fine particles per cubic meter. (California and Indiana worst)
  • Child Poverty rate. (New Mexico and Louisiana highest)
  • High school graduation rates refer to percent of incoming ninth graders who graduate within four years. (Nevada and Mississippi lowest)
  • Lacking Health Insurance. (Texas and Nevada highest)
  • Poor health days refer to the number of days in which a person could not perform work or household tasks due to poor mental (Arkansas and Kentucky worst) or physical health (West Virginia and Kentucky worst)
  • Premature death refers to loss of years of productive life due to death before age 75. (Mississippi and West Virginia highest)
  • Violent crimes. (Nevada and Alaska worst)
  • Personal income refers to income from all sources and is not inflation adjusted. (Connecticut and Massachusetts highest; Mississippi and Idaho lowest)
  • For income distribution, a higher Gini ratio indicates greater income inequality. (New York And Connecticut most un-equal)
  • Unemployment plus underemployment refers to total unemployed, plus all marginally attached workers, plus total employed part-time for economic reasons, as a percent of the civilian labor force plus all marginally attached workers.
  • Employment data are the averages of figures from 2Q 2012 through 1Q 2013. (Nevada and California worst)

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true brain's picture

californication is here. the whole country will be east LA soon.

GMadScientist's picture

East LA...without water from NorCal.

TheTmfreak's picture

Yeah I'm real miserable here on my 8.5 (low cost) acres  where nobody bothers me and i'm 30 minutes from any shopping, high quality privately owned tasty resturants in Louisiana.

Lived in ALOT of states, Louisiana sure as hell isn't the worst by a long shot. I'm sure if New Orleans wasn't counted as part of the state It would be on a totally different level of the chart.

GMadScientist's picture

Why? LA without NO is just AL with more gators!

tarsubil's picture

Add traffic and winter severity and length and Minnesota does not end up 50th. Add communist school indoctrination and Minnesota can roll with the big guys like Mass and New York.

Oh and Maryland 33 and New Jersey 37? I don't think so.

Muppet Pimp's picture

This study is pure shite.  Climate, Taxation and Density of loud mouth assholes need to be included for it to be believable.  It is not surprising that the fellas over at Bloomterd conveniently left those items out.  Fail.

Jam Akin's picture

West Virginia has been miserable for a long time.

francis_sawyer's picture

Yeah ~ According to Bloomberg 'cheesepopes' [who got their greedy slimeball asses kicked out 150 years ago]...


To others:

francis_sawyer lives about a mile from one of those slides there... Nobody around here bitches that much [save for the fact that the Federal Government has anything to do with our land]...

Wanna kno something funny too?... ONE of those slides in that montage is actually taken in 'Virginia' [not WV]... But 'experts' like yourself who kno everything there is to kno about WV, prolly can't guess which one... so fuck off...



Jam Akin's picture

Kinda tetchy today, aintcha Jethro?  I was joking.  Sorta.  There is a hell of a lot more crap thrown at my hometown of Chicago here on ZH than I've ever seen about West Virginia.  Lots of it due to some politico who aint even a real Chicagoan, but I digress..

First time I saw WV was over 30 years ago.  Lots of abandoned mines and rundown shacks with washers on the porch.  Pretty miserable.  Then again so is much of Chicago.  There is good and bad everywhere.

Pegasus Muse's picture

Pothole / Busted Axle Index:  NY ranks #1 with NYC off the chart.

Population Density of Rude Obnoxious A-holes:  NYC #1 

Shitty Commute Index:  Northern VA / Maryland #1 especially if you must cross the Potomic.

Hellhole War Zone Index:  O'Blamer's Windy City comes in #1;  Murder Capital of the World w/ 46 killings just last weekend alone. 

First three assessments based on personal knowledge.

There are three kinds of lies; lies , damn lies and statistics. And Michael Bloomberg  --Disraeli (modified)

johngaltfla's picture

Amen. Several of the "least" miserable states have huge health, taxation, and unemployment issues not accurately reflected in the survey.


This is just more Liberal elitist marxist bullshit to let everyone know that if you are willing to bend over and get raped like a welfare whore you too can be "less miserable" in the new worker's paradise.

Flakmeister's picture

You are free to rationalize it anyway you like. But that apoplectic attitude is gonna give you cancer.....

Flakmeister's picture

Well, fuck you and the ISP that got you here....

CheapBastard's picture

Did Fuki cause this? After all, we have had reports of bald seals and sea lions on the west coast and Alaska:


25,000 bees die in Oregon parking lot


WILSONVILLE, Ore. (AP) — Workers on Friday plan to wrap bee-proof netting around blooming trees in the parking lot of an Oregon shopping center in an attempt to prevent the deaths of more bees.

State officials say tests to confirm the cause of the deaths could take two or three more days. They are checking for insecticides as well as possible natural causes.

Aurora Ex Machina's picture

They were bumble bees, not honey bees [hint: one lives in a hive, with a complex social structure, the other are largely solitary. Since they don't have a colony, bumble-bees don't get CCD]. They sprayed shit loads of insecticide all over an area with trees and wondered why they killed everything. CYOA in action to "add nets" as if that's going to help.

Portland-area bee experts with the Xerces (ZERK-zees) Society for Invertebrate Conservation estimate at least 25,000 bumble bees have died in the lot since last weekend. The bees were clustered under dozens of linden trees.

By the way: I find the lack of your ability to know the difference between a honey-bee and a bumble-bee to be absolutely hilarious for the long term prospects of your society. And no, radiation doesn't do that either, or at least: if it did to that, the complex mammals would be much worse off.

If you need help, I suggest grabbing Google Maps and taking a look at the parking lot in question. It'll explain much.


p.s. Bacon comes from Pigs. I know, it's shocking!

johngaltfla's picture

25K bees died because they thought they were waiting at an Obamacare facility but found out that they were on the "death" list.

MachoMan's picture

Apparently in Arkansas we can now say, thank god for Louisiana in addition to Mississippi!


Martial's picture

Sweet home Louisiana! Yea baby...we #1! You heard dat?!

I am more equal than others's picture

If Louisiana would just get back to pre-Katrina days it would be #1 by 12-lengths running away.  If Mary and Mitch Landrieu get their way Louisiana will be like Huey P. Long days....every man a king - a welfare king.  Who dat!

Banksters's picture

Currently in NC.  Motha fuckas ARE FUCKIN FAT HERE.  I mean CORPULENT.

DaddyO's picture

It's like that in every state!

Corpulence is the new conspicuos consumption...


Parrotile's picture

We already have a "Type II Diabetes Timb-Bomb" situation - which translates to significant now (and increasing in the future) healthcare costs in later life.

Are we blindly heading for a society where parents outliving their offspring (and even grand-children) may become commonplace . . . . . . ? ?

Dingleberry's picture

"state" stats are not nearly has meaningful as city stats. Lots of disinfranchised folk in red states on modern day plantations, designed by liberal democrats for multi-generational votes.

rack's picture

My name-a Borat. I come from Kazakhstan. Can I say first, we support your war of terror! May we show our support to our boys in Iraq! May US and A kill every single arab! May your George Bush drink the blood of every single child! May you destroy their country so that for the next thousand years not even a single lizard will survive in their desert!

F. Bastiat's picture

Frankly, I don't buy the argument that you can magically quantify opinions of misery.

bigdumbnugly's picture

lemme introduuce you to my ex wife...


you can call it.



MachoMan's picture

In all fairness, it's probably mutual...

DaddyO's picture

C'mon MachoMan, where's your sense of humor!?!


NotApplicable's picture

Well, to be honest... they didn't use magic. They used statistics!

Shad_ow's picture

It's all relative to how you think.  I am happy most of the time, here in Alabama.  On the other hand some are not.  That is the case every where.  People are the same no matter where you go.  Some good, some bad, some happy, some not.

Citxmech's picture

If all you've been is neck-deep in shit, elbow-deep seems pretty good.  You need to ask folks who've moved around a bit.

I, for instance, can say upon first-person examination that WV is a shithole of epic proportions.  Only place I've seen that was worse was the Hopi reservation in AZ.  My God that place was so tragic it made me litterally want to cry.  You couldn't pay me to go back to California or NY either.   

Shad_ow's picture

Do you assume happy people haven't "moved around?"  Contentment can only be found in allowing yourself to accept and enjoy what you have.  That is realized in wisdom. 

Today I will be neck deep in my swimming pool with steaks on the grill.  The climate here is good at least 8 months of the year and I don't worry about the inner city thugs.

I've not visited WV but of the many places I have been I still contend there is good and bad in all.

Dollar Bill Hiccup's picture

Hmmm. Nevada. Not too pretty a picture. What's up with that Harry? As long as the Casinos are raking it in, you're fine with that?

Cruel Aid's picture

They voted him back in

Suck it up Vegas

Cops in vegas are making a killing though

Cruel Aid's picture

Both, higher pay in a growth industry

oddjob's picture

Given the roughy 7 million ounces of gold per year Nevada produces they might be better on their own.

GubbermintWorker's picture

Wow, Louisiana has one of the highest child poverty rates and most people without health insurance and they're happy? See? Money don't buy happiness!


Turn it upside down and he is right

prodigious_idea's picture

The misery index poll didn't include children

Flakmeister's picture

WV....  throw in reckless coal mining practices and a nascent fraking industry and you have a winner...

GMadScientist's picture

You have to step back and admire the spirit of people so tough they can take that much bullshit for that long and still keep trying.

Spastica Rex's picture

The South shall rise ag'in!

I'm a native Oregonian.

I've heard Oregon referred to as "The Alabama of the West Coast." My response is always the same: I don't think that's fair to Alabama.

Diamond Jim's picture

no...Oregon is split up...there's Oregon and the People's Republic of Portland.........