Uncle Sam Wants You To Invest In "The Patriot Fund"

Tyler Durden's picture

Tired of having your easily-earned (thanks to Benny and the Inkjets) wealth effect go straight to fund the pressure cooking terrorist operations of ole' evil Osama (because that's how stock market investing apparently works)? Have no fear: because Uncle Sam wants you to invest in The Patriot Fund. "The Patriot Fund, www.patriotfund.com, was launched to meet the previously unmet need of a terror-free investment option."  So... there is an unmet need of terror-free investing? It appears so. And while Uncle Sam doesn't actually demand you invest your "money on the sidelines" in this latest carnival attraction of the ever more ridiculous US stock market circus, we give it a few months before it becomes a choice: put your money here or get an IRS audit. Because what is more important than "terror-free" investing?...