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If You Have One Of These Jobs, Good Luck

Tyler Durden's picture




 

While global equity markets (alone) celebrated what appeared to be a somewhat lackluster jobs data dump yesterday, it's not all rainbows and unicorns for the US employee. It is not just manufacturing jobs that are bleeding (as bartenders and waitresses surge), but the following 14 professions have been in decline for the last decade and are projected to drop even further going forward. From shipping clerks to sewing machine operators and typists, the new normal looks a little different from the old normal of the last century.

 

 

Source: BLS and Goldman Sachs

 

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Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:06 | 3726964 bugs_
bugs_'s picture

single borrower, single payer

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:19 | 3726986 UncleBubba
UncleBubba's picture

File Clerk, Data Entry Keyers, Typists, Office Machine operators?

didn't know these still existed. 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:40 | 3727026 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

I had to chuckle when I saw "Printing Press Operator" on there.  A million years ago I was in that industry- eating printing presses alive with digital solutions.  Now the internet is eating digital printing solutions alive.  Book printing and Direct Mail were the last great hold-outs where there was plenty of volume to support big printers and presses, now even they are in decline. 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:50 | 3727041 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

.

Book printing and Direct Mail were the last great hold-outs where there was plenty of volume to support big printers and presses, now even they are in decline.

Printing press operators are still in high demand in the central banking "industry".

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:09 | 3727054 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

If only 'twere true.  Treasury prints the paper currency (Crane Paper out of New England supplies the paper stock to them, the rest is done "in house"). 

Fed does the electronic kind.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:26 | 3727115 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

at least my vcr rewinder job appears to be safe....

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:11 | 3727318 neidermeyer
neidermeyer's picture

Don't let your continuing education slide ,, I understand that there is great demand for DVD and Blu-Ray rewind operators.

http://www.sonicflare.com/IMG_1291.jpg

 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 22:00 | 3727417 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

I can't figure out how to rewind my Internet Streaming Box (ROKU). The only button on it is labelled "reset" and it's located behind a tiny hole so you need a pin to push it. I've never actually pushed it and never had a reason to. Perhaps they employ South Asia Indians to re-wind all that stuff I watch and provide US phone support at the same time.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 09:58 | 3728033 cifo
cifo's picture

Switchboard operator???????? In 2020? This must be a joke.

How about punchcard typist? Or lawnmower/TV/VCR repairman?

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 13:04 | 3728236 ATM
ATM's picture

Those are all still government positions protected by union contracts.

 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 23:56 | 3727579 old naughty
old naughty's picture

"vcr rewinder" will not be safe after the rewind/collapse...

in fact, I don't believe the tellers will still be high up in 2020 as IMHO, these jobs will be robot-o-maxed right after the rewind/collapse, soon...and they'd just be spewing:"Sorry money is not available at this time, please try back later".

You can record that into the vcr.

 

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 00:55 | 3727693 Cast Iron Skillet
Cast Iron Skillet's picture

but then you do need a vcr rewinder.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 01:46 | 3727757 All Risk No Reward
All Risk No Reward's picture

The scary thing is that these numbers don't include the collapse that will occur between now and 2020.

Be scared enough to be concerned to take positive action to gaincontrol over the necessities of life.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:51 | 3727394 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

'Crane Paper out of New England supplies the paper stock to them, the rest is done "in house"'

Yep, that was Myre Kraft's contribution to the empire.  Bob is still happy to have diversified into owning sports teams and attempting to be a real estate mogul.

- Ned

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 10:35 | 3728065 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Local store owner asked me to locate a money counter for him.  I ended up finding an inexpensive one with multiple counterfeit detection levels built-in.  During his first run of less than 100 20's it kicked out four bills. Then it kicked out a couple 10's and 5's.  He said he normally rubs his finger over the 20's to detect the impressions on the bills but they were getting harder to detect.  He said he stopped taking 50's and 100's except from regulars years ago as the counterfeits were rampant.

Seems like Ben has some competition.

Also, this guy gives me his change to sort and 'clean' every week.  I get his bags of coins, throw them in a counter/sorter, then run each type of coin through another sorter that 'rejects' copper and silver coins. Averaging 5-6 silvers a week now and 2-3 rolls of copper. Takes about an hour. I think people are raiding their change jars as the 'Recovery' progresses. I'm looking for a commercial countertop sorter to count coins in the store and keep 5% and the owner gets more sales without the hassle of counting it. 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:30 | 3727125 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

I guess boardgames/cards & calendars are the last ones holding the torch

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:48 | 3727388 Jam Akin
Jam Akin's picture

Video game packaging and such is still a profitable niche.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 11:20 | 3728125 TruthBeforeAll
TruthBeforeAll's picture

I hear the Fed is still hiring.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 00:06 | 3727613 AGuy
AGuy's picture

"File Clerk, Data Entry Keyers, Typists, Office Machine operators?"

There is a huge error on the Office Machine Operators. Today everyone working is an office Machine operator, since virtually everyone has a desktop or laptop PC that they operate.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:49 | 3727955 giggler123
giggler123's picture

Yep, 4years @ college, now on 10year apprenticeship as shipping clerk.  My boss recons in 6years I maybe take the reins.  Ofcourse I gotta pay for my student loan for another 30years, and perhaps a house or two, you know how it is these days flipping seems important, its always on t.v.  I did think perhaps I should have taken up Betamax repairs since their seems more of a future in it...

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 10:36 | 3728067 uhb
uhb's picture

precisely my thoughts when i read that.

 

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 18:07 | 3729019 JeffB
JeffB's picture

I was a little surprised the chart labels them as "Professionals".

 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:38 | 3726999 Taku
Taku's picture

OT: Offer tells driver that his Constitutional rights DO NOT apply at roadblocks, and may be 'taken away' for 'safety concerns'.

Don't know if anyone posted this already, but:

4th of July DUI Checkpoint - Drug Dogs, Searched without Consent, Rights Taken Away, while Innocent

Sure the driver wasn't being a proper sheeple.

That does not give just cause for police to tell you that your Constitutional rights can be taken away for, errr, a roadblock. Or does it? You decide...(what kind of world you want to live in).

Maybe next time they will want your smartphone data. Or DNA sample.

Hmm...

All hail, Emperor Obama.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:54 | 3727045 nmewn
nmewn's picture

I'll see your "guilty until proven innocent/show me your papers Stasi checkpoint" and raise a blatant Third Amendment violation ;-)

"Mitchell claims that defendant officers, including Cawthorn and Worley and Sgt. Michael Waller then "conspired among themselves to force Anthony Mitchell out of his residence and to occupy his home for their own use." (Waller is identified as a defendant in the body of the complaint, but not in the heading of it.)
     The complaint continues: "Defendant Officer David Cawthorn outlined the defendants' plan in his official report: 'It was determined to move to 367 Evening Side and attempt to contact Mitchell. If Mitchell answered the door he would be asked to leave. If he refused to leave he would be arrested for Obstructing a Police Officer. If Mitchell refused to answer the door, force entry would be made and Mitchell would be arrested.'"
     At a few minutes before noon, at least five defendant officers "arrayed themselves in front of plaintiff Anthony Mitchell's house and prepared to execute their plan," the complaint states.
     It continues: "The officers banged forcefully on the door and loudly commanded Anthony Mitchell to open the door to his residence.
     "Surprised and perturbed, plaintiff Anthony Mitchell immediately called his mother (plaintiff Linda Mitchell) on the phone, exclaiming to her that the police were beating on his front door.
     "Seconds later, officers, including Officer Rockwell, smashed open plaintiff Anthony Mitchell's front door with a metal ram as plaintiff stood in his living room."

http://www.courthousenews.com/2013/07/03/59061.htm

No warrant, no nothing, outside of an overriding sense of self importance & superiority.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 20:09 | 3727196 Croesus
Croesus's picture

Moar "Government FOR the People"....

 

</sarc>

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:37 | 3727945 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Be patient.

The time is coming when being a paramilitary policeman will be making yourself a target.

There are plenty of old-timers still around who do not go with this crap, but their numbers are dwindling.

Part of the reason to militarize the police is to make them see you as an enemy combatant and treat you as such.

In the meantime, do not put yourself at risk. You will know when the time is right, when they attack us openly.

You new brainwashed guys out there with badges: what goes around comes around. All of you are making one huge tactical mistake, but I sure won't tell you what it is, bitches. I will tell you this: you will regret ever having picked up that shield. You will learn to fear righteous Americans, I can promise you  that much.

Act only in self-defense, ZH Brothers. Obey their criminal laws until they leave us no choice. You must do so or we lose the moral superiority.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:33 | 3727944 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

I got on YouTube through the link to the Kid getting his Fourth Amendment violated.

 

Yeah. There is a way of fighting back. But then You Tube censors me so quickly. LOL. There were many State Lovers supporting the ILLEGAL SEARCH. So I merely wrote:

 

"If that kid has no right to be safe and secure from Warrantless Searches then the posters whom SUPPORT THIS ACTION have no right to the Freedom of Speech.

Let's have them EXPERIENCE an unwarranted loss of Freedom.

Maybe they need to be placed on the Terror Watch List for their statements to INCITE Civil Disobedience. They need to be REPORTED to DHS.

Maybe they will be placed on the No Fly List. Maybe it might retard their chance for advancement in their Jobs.

You cannot be too safe, right?"

 

I wonder why You Tube censored this??? Do you have a clue?

 

Tall Tom

I Cor 13

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:07 | 3726967 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Professions, mine, professor. Anything to do with education (the net is taking over, they are having us construct our own demise).

Lawyer, I bet.

Banker, I bet.

So many bubbes to burst...

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:19 | 3726985 dynomutt
dynomutt's picture

I read the hotshot ones are buying rental houses in the Hamptons to rent out.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:19 | 3726988 nmewn
nmewn's picture

And if you refuse you don't get your severance package.

Go Team!

Really makes ya want to get up in the morning ;-)

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:46 | 3727036 InvalidID
InvalidID's picture

Debt collections are booming!

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:54 | 3727039 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Precisely.

Blackboard, Canvas, and the like.

Rote memorization check off lists; no discussion, debate, writing, or critical thinking.

Students supposedly "learning" as they click through a formulaic PowerPoint type slideshow, alone.

They'll take the tests together of course, while they sit on the couch drinking beer and eating delievered pizza or microwave'd easy meals because they can't make toast or boil water.

Tuition up as humans are taken out of equation;  higher profit, less overhead, more money for Administrators.

Before long there won't be classrooms or lecture halls or libraries, just a huge I.T. Department with banks of computers and "Engagement Centers" on campus with every fast food joint and bling restaurant imaginable where students are supposed to discuss and debate their "learning" but they just eat over-salted corporate slop, play on their devices, and hook-up.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:58 | 3727052 nmewn
nmewn's picture

On the bright side, the homeless will now have some really cool buildings to crash in.

Forward!

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:21 | 3727107 jwoop66
jwoop66's picture

Present company excepted, I'm sure professor, but your profession has done more than its fair share to get us in the unconstitutional mess(es) we all presently occupy. 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:12 | 3726971 LetThemEatRand
LetThemEatRand's picture

"it's not all rainbows and unicorns for the US employee."

Even unicorns are having a tough time.  Their days of making a living wage punching the hole in CDs are numbered thanks to iTunes.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:19 | 3726987 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

I used to make vinyl records at RCA. Then I became a typist. 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:39 | 3727023 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Please go into central banking next.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 20:30 | 3727229 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

If I were to do that they would shortly be obsolete.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:55 | 3727407 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

It is Saturday night and all, but I'm guessing that was the point ;-)

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:11 | 3727081 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

You must be old or worked for Uni or 33 1/3...lol.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 20:28 | 3727223 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

Old. Oldly enough, a medical transciptionist can still get work, it just doesn't pay anything. 

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 12:54 | 3728221 Midas
Midas's picture

Do you need to be able to spell transciptionist to get the job?

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:13 | 3726976 dynomutt
dynomutt's picture

Jumpin' Jupiter, those jobs STILL EXIST?!?!!?

 

I can't think of anywhere I've been in the last 15 years that has any positions that match anything like that.

 

Shipping clerk?  That's externalized

Bank Teller? ATM fix everything!

Data Entry Keyer?!? OCR and IT

Printing Press Operator??! Niche, probably a couple thousand left in the country, yes?  Newspapers being chucked in the dustbin of history can't help that.

Loan interviewers and clerks???!? THIS IS ZEROHEDGE! YOU KNOW WHY THIS IS DYING

File clerks?  Yes, I need a file clerk to tell me where COMMAND.COM is

Ticket agent? Externalized and/or automated

Sewing Machine Operator?  This is AMERICA! We can't all be American Giant!

Machine Feeders?!? Ditto, THIS IS AMERICA! We can't all be Tesla/GE!

Switchboard Operator?!!? Wasn't Woz's job in the 70's before Atari and Apple putting together blue boxes that Jobs would sell?  Even in the damned 70's these people were wastes of space!

Postal Services? Postal Barcode/autosort, budget cuts

Typists?!?!? EVERYONE IS A FUCKING TYPIST! HUNT AND PECK IS FOR FUCKING LOSERS!

Flight Attendants? Well, as long as they fit between the seats I guess they're fine.

Office machine operators?! Yes, I need some person JUST FOR operating my laser printer or labeler.  That really makes a whole lot of sense.

 

Seriously, if a company still has any of these and is run by anyone under 70, that person should be shown the door.  Over 70 and they should have been given their gold watch by now.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:20 | 3726990 AR15AU
AR15AU's picture

My little bro has been in printing for a few years now.  It is niche.  All the operators and color mixers have been in the game forever, aging baby boomers, and there is no replacing them with a younger generation.  He can literally work anywhere in the country and they pay him ridiculous sums for such "labor".  Interesting how even in dying industries, there are still opportunities.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:24 | 3726996 dynomutt
dynomutt's picture

I'm pretty sure most of the good work in that sector these days is in junk mail^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^Hpromotional circulars that just EVERYONE wants!

 

And absolutely, positively printed with eco-friendly inks.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:47 | 3727038 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Even direct mail (please don't call it junk mail if you're talking to a junk mailer) is in outright decline.  Partly the internet eating it's lunch, partly a lack of desire to invest in an industry that depends on the bankrupt Post Office to deliver it's finished goods (mailing packages) in a timely fashion.  Most of the Mom-and-Pop DM shops have been eaten by the big boys.  Or just gone bust.

Google "Direct Group" out of New Jersey (now defunct).  If the company had been called "Phoenix Steel" the story would read almost exactly the same.

 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 20:31 | 3727232 bluskyes
bluskyes's picture

I have made my niche maintinaing "legacy systems" that were scheduled to be retired 10+ years ago. No one young wants to learn the old shit, the old guys are retiring, and the systems still do what they were intended to.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 01:25 | 3727063 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

"Loan interviewers and clerks???!? THIS IS ZEROHEDGE! YOU KNOW WHY THIS IS DYING"

Yeah, we are getting to the point in the bubble cycle that they will give a loan to anyone with a pulse again.

"Typists?!?!? EVERYONE IS A FUCKING TYPIST! HUNT AND PECK IS FOR FUCKING LOSERS!"

Agreed, but just wait.  Keyboard to be replaced with thumb swipe text interpret pad, most communications will read like this:

"I go now, bill sent, u sign, u pay, we deliver, thx, nice day."

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:14 | 3726978 dynomutt
dynomutt's picture

I'm surprised punch-card keyers, stackers, and sorters wasn't on this list.

 

IBM fix everything

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 07:49 | 3727907 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Or nine track tape librarians.. 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:16 | 3726980 SpykerSpeed
SpykerSpeed's picture

I used to be a teller, after I graduated a couple years ago.  It's just bizarre to me that that job still exists... people my age (hell, people under age 50) hardly ever go into a bank except to beg for a loan or get a roll of quarters to pay for parking.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:18 | 3726983 dynomutt
dynomutt's picture

One use of the teller is to go coin roll hunting.

Ask for a $500 box of halfs and see if you find any silver ones.

 

As is said on the ZH

SILVER, BITCHEZ!

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:30 | 3727005 SpykerSpeed
SpykerSpeed's picture

Oh yeah, I would get tons of requests for half dollar coins.  I'd never give them out, though - I purchased all of them for myself before the bank even opened for the day.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:06 | 3727071 max2205
max2205's picture

Ha, silver, the new BDI index

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:42 | 3727146 natty light
natty light's picture

The only time I go in my credit union is when the ATM is inaccessible.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:33 | 3727013 Mr. Crisp
Mr. Crisp's picture

I'm thinking of the future. What are the good jobs in Greece?

 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:40 | 3727025 Ban KKiller
Ban KKiller's picture

Food production, fisherman?

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:43 | 3727029 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

You would need to be Miss Crisp.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:08 | 3727916 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Travel agent, U-Haul dealer, Pawn broker, gun smith, bicycle repair & taxi service, shoe repair, taylor, street lamp lighter, farrier/black smith, undertaker, witch doctor, moon-shiner, tire re-treader, appliance repair, auto repair..

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:38 | 3727019 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Printing press operators apparently had a bad 1997.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 20:27 | 3727224 bluskyes
bluskyes's picture

No QE that year?

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:39 | 3727021 Kiss My Iceland...
Kiss My Icelandic Ass's picture

 

 

Would it kill you to display the graph with the text readable horizontally ? I almost twisted my neck

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:20 | 3727336 Never One Roach
Never One Roach's picture

Worse yet, I twisted my back and think I'm permanently disabled....where did you say I apply for that SSDI ?

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:33 | 3727357 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

You don't apply, you just give them your account information online without a doctor visit and they start sending you the checks.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:42 | 3727022 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Looks like Human Beings being replaced by machines.

Where do I apply to be a Hal 9000?

Or can I just retire on SS disability?

Reason:  "Cannot compute, no laser scanners built into eyes, organic parts that need ingestion of fluids, nutrients, and waste evacuation.  Not an automaton; also have a heart and a soul."

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:54 | 3727046 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

You remember in "The Empire Strikes Back" Lando Calrissian had that bald guy with the computer interface embedded in his skull and Lando could send commands to him via remote?  Your future.  And mine.  Enjoy.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:01 | 3727920 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

I thought that was in "Pluto Nash"

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:43 | 3727030 Racer
Racer's picture

Printing press operatives on the list???... I thought there was a  massive ongoing recruitment?

The ChairSatan and other central Bwanksters needs opertatives for their expanding toilet roll printing facilities

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:37 | 3727138 Bear
Bear's picture

Something is amiss ... it says that from 1997 to now Printing press operators increased at least 10 times ... hardly when printing presses only work in .gov, printing regulations and $$$

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:43 | 3727031 WTFUD
WTFUD's picture

I'd wager anyone that the biggest jobs growth area is security ( admittedly it covers a large field ). My best job was doughnut control inspector where i trained people to measure the circumference annd diameter of the middle.
Aah the good old days when one knew ones place!

Back to reality it would be nice to read that 7000 or 95% of public economists jobs were immediately dispensed with. Real waste!

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 18:46 | 3727037 wjkins
wjkins's picture

Tax paying American carpenter..which I find becoming more and more difficult every day.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:07 | 3727075 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

You (and I)[american electrician] are becoming dinosaurs. Use it to your advantage. There are some out there that will pay a premium for your time. You just need to find those customers and keep them,

and their circle of friends happy.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:25 | 3727114 surf0766
surf0766's picture

Have no fear.. once on the other side of the fiat,  only people who can use their hands will survive.

 

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:41 | 3727951 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture

 

 

Indeed.

 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:36 | 3727133 de3de8
de3de8's picture

Due to OSHA?

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:07 | 3727924 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

15 years ago they said, 'get a trade, they can't outsource carpentry plumbing etc to india'

BUT, that's where NAFTA, H1-B, came in, and now this fucking immigration travesty

Can't outsource the job - insource the cheap labor, from mexico, india, china, russian, poland. 

This whole thing is about reducing our standard of living vs the rest of the world.   Just saw on CNN (only because I was stuck watching it while having breakfast) about how we're now having to import GP doctors because 'everyone' in the US is going for specialists. 

Believe it, it's true marxism/facism....there will be the elite and there will be the rest.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:36 | 3727134 q99x2
q99x2's picture

The United States of America could use a President. The position has been left wide open by a fucking globalist CIA puppet

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:40 | 3727144 Bear
Bear's picture

Flight Attendant ... one of the hardest jobs to get in US. "When Delta Air Lines recently put out the “help wanted” sign for 400 flight attendants, more than 50,000 people applied."

 

http://www.marketplace.org/topics/business/want-be-flight-attendant-get-line

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 00:11 | 3727622 WAMO556
WAMO556's picture

I have seen some of the FLIGHT ATTENDANTS that got hired.... The term BATTLEAX comes to mind....

WOW!

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:44 | 3727148 Heroic Couplet
Heroic Couplet's picture

Talk to career counselors at a local community college.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 19:44 | 3727149 Sutton
Sutton's picture

Put Floor Brokers up there to.

Gonzo

 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 20:23 | 3727214 Monedas
Monedas's picture

Professions .... typist, sewing machine operator, machine feeder ?  Jizz moppers ?

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 20:43 | 3727265 Village Idiot
Village Idiot's picture

By the looks of the handles on this thread old poster's might make it.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:31 | 3727353 Judge Crater
Judge Crater's picture

A lot of those jobs are hooked in with factory workplaces.  A factory shipping clerks sends out manufactured products.  Trouble is, thanks to NAFTA, ruinous tax policies that favored outsourcing and competition from China, some 50,000 large factories closed in the USA in the 1990s.  That represents a lot of fairly well paying full-time  jobs, many with health and retirement benefits.  Those factory closings hollowed out the industrial heartland of the USA.  The job I would like is to be part of VP Biden's entourage, to travel for free to first class hotels overseas, spending $500,00 or more on each two day, one hotel night "business" trip. 

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:45 | 3727384 Jam Akin
Jam Akin's picture

Couldn't pay me enough to travel with that Yayhoo...

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:58 | 3727413 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

these are "professions?"

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 21:59 | 3727414 Lmo Mutton
Lmo Mutton's picture

How do you get an FA onto the flight deck?

Put a twinke on the dash and grease her hips.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 22:18 | 3727439 Promethus
Promethus's picture

How about first responder with a six figure salary and pension. Hope that gravy train ends. Our "heros" killed that golden goose.

Sat, 07/06/2013 - 22:19 | 3727445 nestle
nestle's picture

McDonald is always hiring ppl.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 00:08 | 3727616 CuriousPasserby
CuriousPasserby's picture

Fuck that work. I just want to get a fishing boat and learn to be a master baiter.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 02:04 | 3727776 Manic by Proxy
Manic by Proxy's picture

Come again?

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 00:21 | 3727649 toadold
toadold's picture

I found a job posting on line for part time data entry. It was for company that runs toll both camera's.  They needed people to manually enter License plate numbers. I suspect they were having a problem with their OCR picking up the plates....heh.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 01:21 | 3727735 FleaMarketPete
FleaMarketPete's picture

How can we get "HR Professionals" on there?  Sorry ladies, hiring people is not a science.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 02:54 | 3727802 pitz
pitz's picture

"HR Professional", sounds like a complete oxymoron.  I've never met a so-called "HR Professional" that was professional at all.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 07:08 | 3727885 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

Lucrative professions with a future: professional hitmen specializing in bankers and financiers.  Needed urgently - a Corzine capper....

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:11 | 3727930 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Yeah but when the whole system collapses, the rising professions will soon be gun smith, shoe repair, bicycle repair, appliance repair, undertaker...

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 08:11 | 3727931 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

On the bright side, I see huge opportunities for the Professionally Unemployed.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 09:00 | 3727970 sunnyside
sunnyside's picture

In my first job when graduating college in 1986 we had a common secretary for six of us young engineers.  We had computers with word processors, but the old engineering manager felt the secretary was there to type our reports (any he did were still hand written and then given to her).  She had to have something to do and we were required to have her type them (no it wasn't for spelling or form).  It got so ridiculous that we would actually write the reports on the processor (I think it was Word Star or Word Perferct), print them and hand them to her and then she would proceed to re-type them out on her typewritter and then return them to us. 

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 09:08 | 3727980 Mr. Hudson
Mr. Hudson's picture

They didn't include prostitution on the graph. That has increased since 1997.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 09:38 | 3728009 rsnoble
rsnoble's picture

Just going to have to do your own thing and make the best of it because relying on and employer has always not been a good idea and even worse now.  For many, and esp those over 40, being thrown out of job now is like being dropped off on a deserted island and it is either do or die.

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 10:43 | 3728079 Smiddywesson
Smiddywesson's picture

The service industry did well during the Great Depression, so the repair industry should do pretty well.  

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 11:10 | 3728105 Carnegie_IB
Carnegie_IB's picture

Peter Drucker provides great reads into this subject matter. From his readings I learned that two types of workers are evolving. 1. service workers 2. knowledge workers. 

The service workers are expected to represent the larger portion of the workforce and support the knowledge worker. Similar to the support a warrior or knight had in history. 

Lower standard of living economies will have a greater emphasis on operating or physical related occupations. This may explain why outsourcing manufacturing jobs is believed to increase the standard of living of the relative economy. 

 

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 11:51 | 3728146 knowshitsurelock
knowshitsurelock's picture

Why not become a bureaucrat?  They make twice as much as the private sector, have huge retirement, medical, sick leave and vacation packages, and you really don't have to produce anything of value, or do anything which actually furthers commerce. 

All you have to do is harass those who create the value added to insure the necessary taxes that pay you, and slow down and destroy anyone who is trying to get something done.  You can never get fired for incompetence because that is the job description.  You will learn how to back stab others, how to be a total asshole, how to stop thinking logically, how to pass the buck, ignore anything which is helpful, and how to talk on the phone and do your nails at the same time.

These bureaucrat jobs are always hiring!

Sun, 07/07/2013 - 13:16 | 3728248 Gavrikon
Gavrikon's picture

High School Grad, went to work in a factory.  Laid off.  Back to School.

College Grad in IT.  Got replaced by cheap labor from India.  Went to night school.

Got a Real Estate Brokers License.

Need I continue?  Still wondering what those "jobs of the future" might be.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 00:57 | 3729953 Minister of Bre...
Minister of Bread and Circuses's picture

I don't get "flight attendants". Is air traffic decreasing, is the cohort on each aircraft decreasing, or are existing attendants working more flights?

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