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Fact Or Fiction: Booming Tear Gas Industry Continues To Lead Global Economic Recovery

Tyler Durden's picture




 

"The market for tear gas just keeps growing and growing... We can only hope that more people demand tear gas and the recovery will be here sooner than we thought," said an analyst.

(Starts at 0:19)

 

 

Source: The Onion

 

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Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:14 | 3731953 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

'The Onion' on Tear Gas bitchez!... Now THAT's funny!

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:28 | 3732014 GenXer
GenXer's picture

Who are the biggest companies that supply riot gear and tear gas? With coming civil unrest it is not a stupid investment play.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:32 | 3732026 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

"Wonderbread" [for the riot gear]... Hope that helps...

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:36 | 3732200 malikai
malikai's picture

Wait, how is the tear gas market competing with the prison markets?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K2IYIJc1f00

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 10:19 | 3733850 Vic Odd
Vic Odd's picture

I'm long gas masks

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:09 | 3732521 Stoploss
Stoploss's picture

Call Direxion, were gonna need 3X leverage on the long play, use GASM as the ticker.

For the short play with the same leverage, use OSHT as the ticker.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:42 | 3732055 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Reminds me of the bad old days of Agent Orange boosting the value of Dow Chemical and Monsanto.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agent_Orange

And lets not forget that great old saying back then from DuPont:  "Better Living Through Chemistry"

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:46 | 3732057 JohnG
JohnG's picture

 

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_tear_gas_manufacturers

http://www.policeone.com/police-products/tactical/riot-gear/manufacturers/

 

I'm astounded that I wsa able to find that with two searches.

I will down vote myself.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:06 | 3732130 JohnG
JohnG's picture

 

 

I'll be damned. 

For a few grand you can buy, online, the same or better gear than cops use.  All of it. 

Even body armor for your dog.

Project Mayhem Proceed.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:10 | 3732141 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

It's so funny I'm cryin' -- or maybe that's the tear gas -- or The Onion(s).  

Dunno for sure...

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 00:08 | 3733204 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

I hear that cans of wasp insecticide can be squirted under the face shields on riot gear.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:37 | 3732605 Boondocker
Boondocker's picture

Its been a good play since 2009...

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 03:48 | 3733397 The Navigator
The Navigator's picture

Forward, Empire!

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:34 | 3732032 Unpopular Truth
Unpopular Truth's picture

this may be off topic, but why are you calling everyone else bitchez? Do you need professional help top resolve any issues? Whether you do or don't, I must say this distracts from your opinions which I otherwise agree with!

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:42 | 3732058 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Welcome to ZH, bitchez.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:18 | 3732241 prains
prains's picture

you may prefer Glitchez!

<---Tyler, only trying to help out

if being nondenominisexually correct is your thing, plus it will help keep the ZH five O off your whiskey tango foxtrot

don't even go to the cheesepoop meme, it'll just cause cramping

 

just think of Glitchez as Bitchez but with a kick stand and trainers til you get warmed up and have your first bloody nose, Franc will oblige but not until he's perfected his Ciabatta helmet with chin straps

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 02:59 | 3733376 PT
PT's picture

Unpopular Truth asks, "... why are you calling everyone else bitchez?"  :

Are you new here?

Yes, I don't know either.  And it looks like we won't find out in a hurry.  But I do believe that the correct terminology is, "Gold Bitchez", give or take a bit of punctuation and font manipulation.  ( At one stage it got reeeaalllllyyy tedious. ) Maybe we need a ZH anthropologist to study these things and report to us lesser mortals. 

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 06:28 | 3733474 e-recep
e-recep's picture

shut up, bitch and keep stacking.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:34 | 3732036 SpykerSpeed
SpykerSpeed's picture

Why do people upvote retarded comments like this?

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:05 | 3732502 noless
noless's picture

Its this sites version of "first post" it hails from when gold was in an unstoppable climb. Haven't seen a sincere "gold bitchez!" In a while, but i'd put money on its eventual return.

1800 cut a bunch of people down.

I still want a thread crawler that goes through the archives and finds the first "wow this place has really gone to shit" post, I'm guessing it resides somewhere in the first few months.

Sorry if you don't agree, but everyone loves to feel involved.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:08 | 3732516 noless
noless's picture

Oh sorry, did you mean the mentality or the context?

Because honestly, tear gas is most definitely a growth industry, even if this is satire.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:14 | 3731961 gold mans sack
gold mans sack's picture

Made in China.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:49 | 3732078 YHC-FTSE
YHC-FTSE's picture

Jesus. It figures a that a US manufacturer of teargas would fly the Israeli flag at their factory in Jamestown. The bastards don't even try to hide it.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:53 | 3732093 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Yeah, match made in heaven.

 

And while this may be an Onion headline for now, wait until this Zimmerman thing breaks loose. Do a search on 'zimmerman riot preparedness'.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:06 | 3732132 XitSam
XitSam's picture

I did that search and all that came up was AR-15 and shotgun links.

Having experienced both tear gas (Army basic gas chamber) and horseradish, tear gas is nothing compared to horseradish.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:05 | 3732125 Jackagain
Jackagain's picture

Yeah...Israel uses tear gas while the Palestinians use Russian made surface to surface missiles and bus bombs....

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:20 | 3732159 YHC-FTSE
YHC-FTSE's picture

Er, I think you may have conveniently left out, cluster bombs, JDam air strikes, artillery, tanks, gunships, APCs, etc - you know, all the shit the Israelis used to conduct the longest military occupation in modern history with the added spice of Mossad.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:24 | 3732325 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

You forgot nucular (sic) weapons. 

You know those peace keeping devices without which are benign. /sarc

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:46 | 3732419 Monedas
Monedas's picture

If the Palestinians had nuclear weapons .... they would have used them by now .... duh ?  Don't give me this crap that my Jews are as heathen as the Muslims .... ruthless and righteous .... yes indeed .... but cruel and mean .... no way !

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:14 | 3731962 alangreedspank
alangreedspank's picture

Makes me cry...

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:17 | 3731972 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

It's a crying shame.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:18 | 3731976 GVB
GVB's picture

It's sad indeed

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:19 | 3731979 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Somebody tell Danny Kelvin that the 'Texans' picked up Ed Reed in the offseason...

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:22 | 3731990 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

Or,... sounds like a gov't contract in CRYME being committed.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:36 | 3732198 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

I'm all teary eyed

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:23 | 3732566 noless
noless's picture

Only for your citizenismisms.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:15 | 3731964 CharliePrince
CharliePrince's picture

makes ya wanna cry

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:15 | 3731966 CharliePrince
CharliePrince's picture

you were first

 

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:17 | 3731974 kill switch
kill switch's picture

GOLD SILVER NEVER OT

 

The trillion dollar question is what is really going on with metals?  No one is selling, everyone is buying, drying up supplies and sending premiums through the roof. I will tell you and make it as clear as I can. I will detail for you the exact reasons behind the scenes from the board room strategies to the public market.
We are witnessing a grand chess game being played out right before us.

From V, Steve Quayle.com:

Recap the last two weeks and what have we heard? Precious metals beat down, China economic numbers and dollar regaining it’s strength and fools rallying in stocks all based on parlor tricks, no volume, insider trading, FED manipulations, and contracting growth. If this were a soap opera it would be called “The Dumb & The Reckless”.

The trillion dollar question is what is really going on with metals? I mean no one is selling, everyone is buying, drying up supplies and sending premiums through the roof. I will tell you and make it as clear as I can. I will detail for you the exact reasons behind the scenes from the board room strategies to the public market. We are witnessing a grand chess game being played out right before us.

One thing you all have to understand in the game of slights called the markets Is this. That confidence is everything and suppressing the price of precious metals is imperative to having an image of monetary credibility. Look at the biggest players in the gold market is the Central Banks and the Bullion banks. It is a very dubious and interesting relationship, a Frick to a Frack a Ying to a Wang. Central Banks are not required by the IMF to disclose the Gold Holdings ( of which they have very few) and Bullion Banks are not required to disclose allocations of Gold they have out for loan (except to each other). Now do you see this as a problem? I do. If this is not another empirical evidence of a rigged casino then my friend you have not been paying attention.

The way this Central Bank (CB) and Bullion Bank (BB)relationship works is this: a BB will ask a CB for gold. They will hammer out the details amongst themselves in terms of loan length, amount, rate etc.. Then the BB will take it and loan it out to the market until eventually the CB gets it’s gold back. This happens hundreds of times a week. Recently though what has occurred is that you have had a culmination of a few things.

1. Continued cracking of the financial markets
2. BOJ out stimulating the FED 3:1
3. Continued failures in the corpse that is the EU
4.UK financial issues and contractions

So what should the troubled central banks do? Simple, like I said, the most important thing in this world of smoke and mirrors is having the appearance of financial or monetary credibility. You short metals, pump fear of Chinese economic meltdown and viola the lost sheep come corralling back in to the US Dollar pen.

Something has changed though. Since precious metals have been shorted and every managed money fund (Hedge Fund) has bought the trick, the Bullion banks have fulfilled their shorts contracts for June….Now their contracts for August going forward is guess what? LONG!!! Long on Precious Metals.

The four largest of this cabal are Net long 26,000 plus contracts on gold and the same can be said for silver. Why now? Simple their risk exposure has been mitigated.  I have told many of you that you can only ignore market principles of for so long before they come back and haunt you. With the physical supplies drying up the bullion banks are in a consensus, there never was a time in history of modern banking that their risks have been this LOW!!! There is no over abundance of supply like it was in the 80?s and 90?s to create massive volatility. They have with the last shorting de-risked their trading books and are NOW HUNGRY TO BUY and GO LONG!!!! They are expecting the prices to rise and given the fact they suckered the Hedge Funds the move in Gold and Silver is going to be EXPLOSIVE especially when fund manager gets a rude awakening and dashes to close their positions.

The market these days is rife with instability and volatility with exchanges trying to keep up appearances of confidence while going through the motions. This is the NORM now not the EXCEPTION. This is the number one reason the world is waking up to the fact that ownership in precious metals make sense. Look it took the Japanese market 21 days to dump 26% it took gold almost two years to drop a similar percentage!!!!! Welcome to my world equity traders and brokers!!! There is NO CONFORMATION BIAS HERE!!!

The world is waking up to the fact that the US, Japan, UK and EU is nothing but a bunch of has-beans.   The old guard whose wares and services are no longer needed. To them Gold and Silver ownership is a way to protect themselves from the inevitable failings of a system that has run amok for the last few decades. We are witnessing before our eyes the very destruction of the equity and bond markets of the Quagmire Quartet (US,UK, JP, EU). This will end badly for many especially those that still don’t understand the larger agenda and the difference between the paper and physical markets.

What is quickly lost, in this case is quickly gained.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:21 | 3731987 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

"The world is waking up to the fact that the US, Japan, UK and EU is nothing but a bunch of has-beans"

~~~

"Has BEANS"?... That's news to me... I always thought we were a 'BANANA REPUBLIC' [& 'yes' we have no bananas]...

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:29 | 3732017 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

That's a typo. Should've been "has-no-beans."

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:41 | 3732053 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

..Nor a Republic... anymore... Totalitarian, next up.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:26 | 3732337 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Think he meant to say has-beanies.  They're just missing the propeller.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:34 | 3732375 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

      Got, "NAT GAS?" 

   I'm still laughing over that "Bread Helmut" comment you made yesterday francis. That was classic!

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 00:38 | 3733241 BringOnTheAsteroid
BringOnTheAsteroid's picture

I didn't get it.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:31 | 3732024 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

Central Banks are not required by the IMF...

Stopped reading right there. Wordy, pointless, clueless.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:08 | 3732113 kill switch
kill switch's picture

Lets hear your informed analysis....much more than clueless I suppose,,,,Start talking buzzsaw99 BTY What does that indicate about you???

Your avatar is one ugly son of a bitch Arnoald SSSSS

Stopped reading right there,,,so your challenged with long post and books??? That may have more to challenge you intellect and you cash out??? Sad on you.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:45 | 3732620 noless
noless's picture

I fucking wish i could be buying right now. I don't discount some huge down, but honestly, for the electronic trader, this shit is prime for profit.

I'm still in the 700fr isn't unreasonable camp, but if i actually had the money i wouldn't mind chips at the table right now..

6 month: anyone trading gold(without significant cash on hand) is so fucking hammered that they can't keep their doors open, delivery shortfall without (even online retailers) playing. To the general public it looks like foolishness, and overreach. Some survive.

The end point is can the average fuck afford a gram without fucking up his households solvency, it drifts back to wages, the only "jobs recovery" Is in do nothing nepotistic office work, that feeds service industry.

How in the fuck does the food get to the city? Can we honestly live in a system where the only reason why all of us aren't starving is because of a slave population, often times on par intellect wise with those who govern?

But the roads must roll right?

I love when i hear that the poverty line is five times what i could conceivably make in a year.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:22 | 3731995 Overfed
Overfed's picture

Second biggest booming industy- gas masks. Get one.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:33 | 3732028 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Third, bread helmets.  Get two.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:27 | 3732343 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Can I call you chowder head since it's in a bread bowl?

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:23 | 3732001 JJ McApe
JJ McApe's picture

long teargas, guns, spionage equipment, paper and ink

short, hope, freedom, free markets, good life

;(

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:28 | 3732016 Rainman
Rainman's picture

They oughta package up all the gas coming from Oblameo ,,, that's led millions to tears.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:35 | 3732037 falak pema
falak pema's picture

A man called Anthony Sampson, ex journalist,  once wrote  the following books of corporate trends in the 60s -70s :

Th sovereign state (ITT conglomerate)

The arms bazaar (MIC)

The seven sisters (Oil mafia)

The money lenders ( Banksta cabal post 1971)

In a nutshell its the story of Pax Americana when it morphed.

What we see today are the seeds of that decay, which accelerated from the 80s onwards, under the deregulated booster of Reaganomics and NWO outsourcing meme. Then came the derivatives age of ZIRP bubbleonomics.

whoopeee.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:44 | 3732062 Rainman
Rainman's picture

I thought ' rise and fall of the roman empire ' was a good read too.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:55 | 3732097 falak pema
falak pema's picture

written by : 

Gibbon is considered to be a son of the Enlightenment and this is reflected in his famous verdict on the history of the Middle Ages: "I have described the triumph of barbarism and religion."[34] However, politically, he aligned himself with the conservative Edmund Burke's rejection of the democratic movements of the time as well as with Burke's dismissal of the "rights of man."[35]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Gibbon

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:48 | 3732231 Optimusprime
Optimusprime's picture

That Gibbon respected Burke is simply a sign of good sense.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:43 | 3732060 Moe Howard
Moe Howard's picture

Tear gas. A Chicago favorite since 1968.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:26 | 3732340 itstippy
itstippy's picture
Have the authorities even considerd firing N2O cannisters into the enraged mob?  Or are they too concerned about depleting the ozone layer?
Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:49 | 3732079 NumNutt
NumNutt's picture

How about we long pitch forks and torches.......

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 17:54 | 3732094 Jackagain
Jackagain's picture

But when you hear of wars and commotions, do not be terrified; for these things must come to pass first, but the end will not come immediately.” Luke 21:9

"Commotions" means tumult, rioting 

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:09 | 3732135 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

     Would you like a few cases of humane crowd control (tear gas), to go with your new drone Sir?

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:11 | 3732143 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

My wife will have the double tap, please.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:13 | 3732147 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

  Did you two get the hell out of Dodge yet?

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:32 | 3732368 IridiumRebel
IridiumRebel's picture

Less than a month bro.

Wed, 07/10/2013 - 12:28 | 3737801 MeelionDollerBogus
MeelionDollerBogus's picture

Don't you mean the DAILY DOUBLE (tap)?

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:45 | 3732223 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

I'll take Water Cannons for $1,000 Alex!

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:09 | 3732136 icanhasbailout
icanhasbailout's picture

2:06 is win

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 18:46 | 3732227 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

What you gonna do when they come for you? Bad boys, bad boys.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:32 | 3732367 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Homemade stink-bombs.

Cleared out a 7th grade auditorium in a heartbeat.

 

Oops, I may still be wanted for that one.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 19:51 | 3732445 Monedas
Monedas's picture

Egypt gets its tear gas for free .... why can't we sell our weapons .... like the Norkos and Russians ?

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:01 | 3732459 Monedas
Monedas's picture

Would this be a good time .... to tell you about .... my new improved "Monedas Cocktail" .... it's a Martinelli's apple juice bottle .... the grenade size .... filled with gas and stoppered .... three sparklers are duct taped to the bottle .... redundancy .... light sparklers .... wait and throw .... gasoline ignites when the glass breaks .... looks like the ignition of the Space Shuttle rocket motors !  This is a classic .... better tag it !     Monedas    1929    Comedy Jihad World Tour

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:30 | 3732588 shankster
shankster's picture

What's that smell?

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:30 | 3732592 shankster
shankster's picture

Sweet aroma of gas in the morning.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 20:52 | 3732641 Lord Drek
Lord Drek's picture

1 Timothy 6:10 For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 21:00 | 3732656 fukidontknow
fukidontknow's picture

Smells like Democracy 

Mon, 07/08/2013 - 21:56 | 3732813 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

And I have a guillotine start-up in the garage. I should KickStart it.

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 01:45 | 3733301 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

So is FLIR / NAV-TV. CCA and related Federal Prison IPO's. They are creating a war driven economy which China holds the Lions share of tech patents because of their unfeddered access to a USPTO back door granted years ago, so be advised.

And no, we can never leave Afghanistan, contrary to a new article released eluding to an exit, just feel good Hopium. IMHO, Several American banks would collapse overnight, then troops would have to be retasked because we can't bring them all home en mass. No work and waining Govt. support dictates that fact.

My opinion is that we no longer need the Petro dollar. I believe were pegged to the Narco Dollar.

Out of all the Opious dirivitive  world wide, the USA consumes 80% of the total production. Shocking.. Thanks to Big Pharma and Dr's soliciting the hell out of it. 

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 05:20 | 3733444 22winmag
22winmag's picture

Without welfare to pay for things, the drug racket in America would collapse overnight.

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 02:48 | 3733373 Morla
Morla's picture

These protesters are just evil speculators, taking delivery of physical gas trying to break the market.

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 05:26 | 3733447 22winmag
22winmag's picture

Cry me a river.

Tue, 07/09/2013 - 13:26 | 3734489 Trampy
Trampy's picture

What's with all the ads here for Yifan crushing machines from China?

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!