NYPD Searching For Parachutists Who Landed Near Goldman's New York Headquarters

Tyler Durden's picture

Just in case you thought the surreality of the US political debacle we are witnessing was too much, the NYPD releases a statement that stokes the fire of confusion. The New York Police Department is looking for two unidentified people who may (or may not) have parachuted on to a lower Manhattan Street. Private security guards reported seeing the skydivers land in front of the Goldman Sachs HQ at around 3am (which we could not help but note was the highs of the European session for Gold). The police noted it was unclear if they jumped from a plane or from a high-rise building (or from Bernanke's helicopter).


Via AP,

New York City police are looking for two unidentified people who may have parachuted onto a lower Manhattan street.


NYPD Commissioner Raymond Kelly said private security guards reported seeing parachutists land in front of the Goldman Sachs headquarters at about 3 a.m. Monday. The building is near the World Trade Center site.


Investigators are studying security videotape from the area. Kelly says footage shows two people with parachutes walking away from the spot.


Kelly says it's unclear whether the pair possibly jumped from an aircraft or from a high-rise building.


In June, police in Chicago said three men climbed to the top of the Trump International Hotel & Tower, North America's second-tallest building, and parachuted to the ground. They got away.

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mjorden's picture

Chinese 'Dark Knight' seeks revenge ...

flacon's picture
Gene Burnett - Jump You F*#kers (A Song For Wall Street)


Central Bankster's picture

Shouldn't they be arresting the "golden parachutes"?

Lost My Shorts's picture

Why should they arrest anyone?  Is it illegal to parachute in NYC?  Or were they smoking and carrying large quantities of high fructose corn syrup?

SWRichmond's picture

they were doing a test of the escape plan for higher management at Goldman.  

Lost My Shorts's picture

I always figured higher management would leave by space ship.  Maybe the jumpers were practicing to be decoys.

Testudo321's picture


Even when the f*#kers jump they have an parachute ready. Real one or even an golden one.........

Dareconomics's picture

They're probably just base jumpers, but ZeroHedge makes it sound much more intriguing. 


Tinky's picture

A new twist on Golden Parachutes?

Central Bankster's picture

Damn you beat me to this joke. ;/

zhandax's picture

Golden Parachutes?

No, those touch down in front of Marriner Eccles, and are immediately redacted.

Sandmann's picture

They were't parchutists but women in chadoor

Mae Kadoodie's picture

Lloyd returning to earth after a meeting with God.

citrine's picture

Plus 1: that is really funny!

TaperProof's picture

Parachutes is exactly what goldman execs will get when the shit hits the fan. Golden parachutes

Stuck on Zero's picture

Bernanke's helicopter developed engine trouble and the crew bailed out.


Constitutional Republic's picture

Someone's rather nervous. That's you, Goldman Sacks. Very amusing. I blame the parents ;-)

Downtoolong's picture

parachutists land "in front" of the Goldman Sachs headquarters

As Maxwell Smart used to say, “Missed it by that much”. Oh well, maybe next time.

NoDebt's picture

"(or from Bernanke's helicopter)."

Very funny.  Well played.

knowshitsurelock's picture

At the same time the Senate is voting on whether to shut the goverment down?  The country is in peril and these guys are clowning around?  How blaphemous!

Constitutional Republic's picture

The sky is falling! What shall we do if CONgress shuts down? Live happily ever after...in our own communities, and Goldman Sacks can go get a proper job as honest highway robbers ;-)

WillyGroper's picture

The 2 generals that got sacked today.

Yen Cross's picture

  The 'Trump Tower' is several hundred feet shorter than 'Willis Tower' (formerly Sears Tower)


 The new WTC is 46 Feet higher than Willis Tower (1776 Ft.) That would make trump Tower #3 in North America at best.


    It's too bad Blankfein wasn't out on the roof barking at the moon. They could have given him a "Golden Shower" on their way down.

Tabarnaque's picture

If they were banksters then it is too bad that they had parachutes. 

Everyman's picture

Hopefully the parachutists have hammers, and are going to beat the quid to bloddy pulp!

22winmag's picture

Big deal... they demolished WTC 1, 2, and 7 in broad daylight, killing nearly 3,000 Americans... and thanks to the government-media complex spewing bullshit on the magnitude of the JFK magic bullet sham, very few people even give it a second thought.

EndTheIllusion's picture

Oh no, Ray Kelly will never stand for these "terrorists" landing so close to his overlords. 

ToNYC's picture

The only way to get there without a limo; way off the beaten path at 200 West Street by design.

XitSam's picture

Typical police. They're wasting resources looking for people that did not kill themselves and apparently did not disrupt anything more than the security guards' poker game. "Hey, look! Guys in the street with paracuhutes!" 

sansnobel's picture

Bernanke was dropping in On Lloyd and Tribe to make a Midnight deposit, to be shipped out the next morning of course to those starving children in Palestine..............Doing God's work and all

Dr. Bonzo's picture

If the parachutes were golden I think it's safe to assume these were senior mngt departures.


Nothing to see here, move along, move along.

sethstorm's picture

So that's how the Federal Reserve sends out its deliveries?

prains's picture

base jumping is so 1999......


drone jumping, that takes balls

Wakanda's picture

Just some adrenaline junkies getting a downtown fix.  I'll bet they are still giggling.  : = )

Cloud9.5's picture

Spetnaz is probing their security.

Vooter's picture

Maybe they jumped from the "Freedom" Tower so that they could feel really "free"...

esum's picture