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Man Sets Himself On Fire On National Mall, Near White House

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Yesterday it was a shooting at a runaway mom driver that shut down the Capitol area for hours. Today, while there have been no shootings in D.C.,  moments ago we just got news of a self-immolation in the middle of the National Mall, where a man allegedly doused himself in gasoline and set himself on fire, suffering life-threatening injuries according to the DC Fire Department.

NBC Washington reports that "Passersby on the National Mall in Washington, D.C., ripped off their shirts to help extinguish the flames after a man apparently tried to set himself on fire Friday, witnesses and authorities said. The man was conscious and breathing when he was flown by helicopter to Washington Medical Center, D.C. police said. There was no immediate report on his condition. The incident, which was reported at 4:24 p.m. ET, occurred on Seventh Street Southwest near the National Air and Space Museum, U.S. Park Police said. Witnesses told several media organizations, including NBC Washington, that they saw the man pour gasoline on himself from a red canister and then set himself ablaze. Police said they couldn't confirm those reports. Nearby joggers stopped and ripped off their shirts to smother the flames, NBC Washington reported."

The burned man was promptly carried off the Mall using a helicopter.

Politico adds:

A fire official says a man has been flown to the hospital after setting himself on fire on the National Mall.

 

Fire crews responded Friday afternoon to a report of a man on fire at 7th and Madison streets. A witness says she saw a man dump a red canister of gasoline on his head and then set himself on fire.

 

D.C. Fire Department spokesman Tim Wilson says the man has life-threatening injuries.

 

His name and age weren't immediately known.

Sky News confirms:

Eyewitness twitter user Hellie Hess reported that "someone just lit himself on fire in the middle of the National Mall "

Other did too

More from Twitchie:

 

The burning man was promptly carried out by helicopter:

 

And more pictures:

* * *

So is this the start of the American Spring, er, Fall, or will the ashes be promptly buried under the rug?

 

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Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:36 | 4023885 Cloud9.5
Cloud9.5's picture

Arab Spring?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:53 | 4023966 john39
john39's picture

american fall.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:09 | 4024019 Meat Hammer
Meat Hammer's picture

Double entendre?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:13 | 4024197 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

His "Reason"?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:36 | 4023887 Lednbrass
Lednbrass's picture

FIRE QE in action- free fire for everyone!  All we need is more people setting themsleves on fire, when enough people have combusted all will be well.

There is also the added benefit that it saves our benevolent overlords some bullets.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:42 | 4023916 johngaltfla
johngaltfla's picture

It's Bush's fault.

 

It's Ted Cruz's fault.

 

It's racist anti-Obama Tea Party members faults.

 

It's big oil making a statement.

 

It's the pharm industry denying him the meds he needs.

 

It's big gasoline's fault.

 

It's big match manufacturers fault.

 

It is never Obama's fault. Just remember that fact.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:19 | 4024043 darteaus
darteaus's picture

Good thing he didn't have a gun.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:52 | 4024125 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Under Holder's control MKUltra is now more of an afrimative action programme so you get what you get.  Was supposed to take the AR15 shoot shit up first BEFORE catching fire... and thus leaving no other evidence but Tea Party affiliations and an NRA life membership card. Would have looked perfect on paper.

Hard to get good help.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:36 | 4024613 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

But, he 'went out for a walk' right into it. 

 

Is the political gravity of the situation creating a black hole near the white house ?   The WH is becoming a Zombie Attractor.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 00:46 | 4025004 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

JohnGaltFla------

You seem to place blame on everyone to whom it does not belong. Actually the responsibility falls upon the man who self immolated.

 

I believe in Personal Responsibility. That is something that Republicans seem to have forgotten and Democrats never had believed in the first place.

 

It seems as if you do not as you have pointed the finger at everybody but the responsible party. This expression of attitude is another reason why I am misanthropic. I hate it in others as I find it detestable in myself.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 10:59 | 4025481 docj
docj's picture

I don't presume to speak for JohnGaltFla, but it seems to me he was doing a pretty fair job of Going Onion on the fact that from JAN 01 through JAN 09 every squirrel that was accidently run-over by a car somewhere in the world was laid at the feet of Chimpy McBushitlerburtonCo and Darth Cheney.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 18:01 | 4026473 LooseLee
LooseLee's picture

Two warmongers who should be hanged for treason. Please note that I am a-political and do not worship neither the red nor the blue team.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:43 | 4023924 Ponzi Pontiff
Ponzi Pontiff's picture

You didnt burn that ...

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:13 | 4024028 Millivanilli
Millivanilli's picture

The natives are getting restless.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:24 | 4024053 JuliaS
JuliaS's picture

Someone beat me to the Tesla joke. I retreat in shame.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:11 | 4024184 Zero Point
Zero Point's picture

Time for the Western Spring.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:28 | 4024252 auntiesocial
auntiesocial's picture

what does he do for an encore? buy paper gold? 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 20:09 | 4024371 Bullionaire
Bullionaire's picture

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

 

Thanks.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:50 | 4024300 stant
stant's picture

Game over america

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:57 | 4024322 Nothing but the...
Nothing but the truth.'s picture

The tensions are building right across America. Some citizens are resorting to drastic measures to send the government a message of despair. But those politicians are totally detached from the reality and the agony many of their people are feeling.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 03:57 | 4025188 SilverSavant
SilverSavant's picture

Not a single word on why he did it.   Can you imagine that he didn't have a statement of some kind to make his act worthwhile?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:25 | 4023839 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

As I said in a post the other day here on ZeroHedge concerning the women who rammed the White House gate and earlier the guy who shot up the Naval Yard.

It's the first cracks in the Fascist Regime.  Shit is coming unglued.....the center cannot hold.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:31 | 4023856 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

Yesterday's victim turned out to be a depressed and crazy woman on psychoactive drugs.  Wanna bet this guy was depressed and on similar drugs?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:36 | 4023884 chubbar
chubbar's picture

Ya mean a man who sets himself on fire might be depressed? That's just crazy talk!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:42 | 4023915 Frank N. Beans
Frank N. Beans's picture

this is some weird shit going on

seems like each crazy incident just leaves an example for the next crazy person to imitate. 

 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:49 | 4023944 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

It's like they're mining bad Hollywood movies for bad ideas.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:10 | 4024178 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

I thought Hollywood already did that .

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 22:01 | 4024682 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

That's so meta.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:51 | 4023958 Rainman
Rainman's picture

+ 29 million USA prescriptions for synthetic opiates per annum. 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:57 | 4023978 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

One out of 11? Sounds about right.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 23:24 | 4024885 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Divide the Annual Number by 12 as most Chronic Pain Patients get them refilled MONTHLY.

 

Are you really that INNUMERATE??? One Half of a Percent in America are Chronic Pain Patents.

 

But you have no compassion for that as you probably have no clue what Pain (REAL PAIN) is.

 

I have Lyme Disease. You know? It was that bug engineered by the US Government at Plum Island, the one that escaped to Lyme, Connetticut, where the first cases developed?

 

I do not use Narcotics although I did for awhile. I stopped after I broke my ankle on the Weight Bearing Bone. They wanted to cast it, but, I wanted a Splint, so the Hospital REFUSED FIRST AID. They just did not do anything for me.

 

But do you know that I walked on that Broken Bone until it healed? You must understand that the Broken Bone felt NO DIFFERENT than any other chronic pain which I have.

 

No I do not use Narcotics. I do not drink Alcohol. I take 3200mg of Ibuprofen Daily and am poisoning my Liver. I live with that type of pain every single SECOND of EVERY SINGLE DAY.

 

No problem...It only warps my thinking...a little bit.

 

I think about the threat of some who might be shooting RPGs at Oil Refineries, paralyzing entire Geographical areas through the starvation of Fuel. Or some people maybe shooting them off at landing Passenger Jets at Commercial Airports, or, landing Lear Jets at Regional Airports...the ones that the Wealthy are Passengers in.

 

There are some that might do that because of the lack of compassion expressed on these and other website comments pages.

 

There is no problem with that. Right?

 

You can give this a Thumbs Down if you want but that will not stop or alter my thinking. I think that everyone needs to know just how vunerable the Nation is. Don't you?

 

There are those on Drugs and those that need to be on Drugs.

 

But I am not one of them.

 

SO I REFUSE MEDICAL TREATMENT. That will save some bucks, right?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:04 | 4023998 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

Half of those are Rush Limbaugh...

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 20:51 | 4024505 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

+a kabillion

that's the best laugh i've had all day!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:43 | 4024105 Winston Smith 2009
Winston Smith 2009's picture

"this is some weird shit going on - seems like each crazy incident just leaves an example for the next crazy person to imitate."

Extremely rare events which are inconsequential statistical blips but sensationalist fodder, so they make everyone who doesn't think clearly about that fact say, "The whole country is going crazy. We need more police state apparatus to make us safe."

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 20:12 | 4024381 Bullionaire
Bullionaire's picture

Immolation is the sincerest form of imitation.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:36 | 4023886 LawyerScum
LawyerScum's picture

once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:37 | 4023898 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

That is the story of this economy, a bunch of addicts are pushing it as far as they can, Hunter S. Thompson style. (At least Hunter was kind of cool and had some integrity).

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:33 | 4024078 IndyPat
IndyPat's picture

Amen Sister.
At least when the Doc did it, it was funny....and had a point to it.
At least, most of the time anyway.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:42 | 4023913 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Look the MKUltra program will not be without risks, teething problems and the odd setback. They clearly need MOAR funding to fine tune the psychoactive drugs and triggers to ensure that the 'operatives' stay on the plantation  and don't go feral.

Remember its for the children.... Feel better now?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:58 | 4023974 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

"Yesterday's victim turned out to be a depressed and crazy woman on psychoactive drugs.  Wanna bet this guy was depressed and on similar drugs?"

 

This will be found to be so only if the drug manufacturer has Tea Party and Golden Dawn ties.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:43 | 4024106 IndyPat
IndyPat's picture

Interesting angle....wonder if the reddit crew are working that?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:40 | 4024096 JuliaS
JuliaS's picture

Terrorists take note. Next instead of hijacking planes, paradrop in a few crates of prozac and leave the destruction to us.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:10 | 4024545 shiftless
shiftless's picture

And of course you got downmodded to oblivion, by the idiots who can't see the pattern you just pointed out.

Anyone else notice how many crazy asses are suddenly coming out of the woodwork?

Did you think that was an accident?

Folks, they are trying to come after the crazies and lock them up. Crazies like......YOU AND ME....and other people who do such crazy things as, store up food and water, ammunition, folks who are ex military, people who post on political web sites like this and have a healthy disrespect for authority. WE ARE THE CRAZIES they want to lock up!

Notice how they are portraying the Tea Party as a bunch of "anarchists" and "extremists"?

Did you know that the new DSM 5 manual was recently released, which redefines things so vaguely that just about anyone can be accused of a mental illness?

That's not by accident!

Did you know in the old Soviet Union, that's exactly how they came after political dissidents? By calling them crazy, and locking them up?

Ever heard of Brandon Raub?

This is an existential threat to Liberty! Get the word out!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:17 | 4024569 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Fucking Coffee in the DSM 5.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:54 | 4024663 IndyPat
IndyPat's picture

Shame you got this post in late in the thread. I've said similar and I feel a lot of folks are missing this.

There's another finer point to this mans act.
It's hard to except, because at its most basic level
....if this was done in defiance to tyranny...
Then there is a man in horrible pain in a burn unit somewhere.
His action mocks me a coward in my inaction.

It's that simple and it pisses me off.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 01:05 | 4025036 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

I am as crazy as a Shithouse Mouse. I REFUSE MEDICAL TREATMENT AND DETEST DRUGS. I ENJOY MY PAIN. It has opened up areas of exploration  in thinking, where a Norrnal Person will not ever go. It has given me an interesting perspective on life and the absolute lack of value which it has.

 

And if I do not value my own life then of what value does any other life have?

 

I have actually learned the reason why the Death Penalty has no deterrent affect. I have looked into the abyss and can see it from that dark side of humanity. I can empathize with those as a kindred soul.

 

Yes there is much to be written about ahedonism. (NOT A MISSPELLING). It means without pleasure.

 

Do you want to write about craziness? One must first look in the mirror and then look into the abyss of insanity if one is to truly have any understanding about it.

 

Most of you will never know as you fail to explore it. I know. It's...it's...it's SCAREY!!!

 

Look into the mirror and start your journey tonight.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 02:30 | 4025136 SoCalBusted
SoCalBusted's picture

It just seems a bit too tidy to me.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 17:43 | 4026415 LooseLee
LooseLee's picture

It doesn't matter. The new drug is spontaneous combustion brought about by fraud and injustice. It will be benevolent. It will be beautiful. Let us (those who 'know' what is going on) not let this opportunity get away without taking some fire out of the belly of the beast!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:32 | 4023866 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

"I don't know what's gonna happen, man, but I wanna have my kicks before the whole shithouse goes up in flames."

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:56 | 4024139 akak
akak's picture

We need a national match registration program!  For the children!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:13 | 4024198 odatruf
odatruf's picture

I propose that match books contain no more than six matches.  No one needs a high capacity, pyromanic-style book of 30.  And those boxes of 100 wooden strikes are right out.  For the children!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:20 | 4024218 akak
akak's picture

"Government is not eloquence, it is not reason, it is force!  Like fire, it is a dangerous servant, and a fearful master."

-George Washington

 

I doubt George Washington could have ever imagined the eventual congruence of his analogy in post-fascist USA.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:43 | 4024639 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

And, only safety matches...and separate the special striking surface.  When in a car the striking surface must be locked and the matches not in the glove compartment.

Peoples homes will be searched to ensure safety is enforced.

Strike-matches will be outlawed as they are too dangerous in public hands.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:36 | 4023890 johnconnor
johnconnor's picture

If you are going to set yourself on fire, take a banker or a politician with you too, don't waste your life like that

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:40 | 4023907 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

It worked for Tibet.  Well, sort of.  They did get on the cover of a Rage Against the Machine album!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:48 | 4023939 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

Truly, the highest honor for a political martyr is to be memorialized as a poster for teenage fans of a musical group that claims to be anti-establishment while making its money within the same crass commercial cabal.

Bravo, bravo.

(And I actually like RATM)

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:49 | 4023945 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

Rage Inside the Machine

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:54 | 4023968 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

+1 on the RATM... 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:00 | 4023989 McMolotov
Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:11 | 4024022 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Awesome, always a shame these boys cannot make the final transition that the "State" is the problem.

They should read Murray Rothbard :)

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:05 | 4024002 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Killing Joke "Love Like Blood"... sums up whats coming.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lfxKYdjvQ8I

Mon, 10/07/2013 - 22:10 | 4032809 PT
PT's picture

I hate that song but +1 for anyone who knows Killing Joke.  I might have to read the words.
Kings and Queens
The Wait
Drug
Those songs probably have nothing to do with the point you are trying to make but I just had to mention them. 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:27 | 4023840 Jannn
Jannn's picture

Chinese bank ABC: Run On The FED Highlights The Importance Of Gold Reserves

http://koosjansen.blogspot.nl/2013/10/abc-bank-run-on-fed-highlights.html

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:27 | 4023842 RopeADope
RopeADope's picture

Nice to see the burning man's 1st Amendment rights were trampled on.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:43 | 4023917 Ignatius
Ignatius's picture

Great theme for next year's Burning Man festival to recognize this 'sacrifice', poor bastard.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:15 | 4024201 IndyPat
IndyPat's picture

Like the first monkey shot into space.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:28 | 4023844 ghengis86
ghengis86's picture

American Fall?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:30 | 4023846 Truther
Truther's picture

Tunisia.... Here I come baby.

Next thing you'll see is Riots for better or for worse.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:32 | 4023873 Truther
Truther's picture

FUCK YOU BIG o

FUCK YOU "little" REID

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:40 | 4024101 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

FUCK YOU McLame

FUCK "you've been" Boehner(d)

 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:29 | 4023849 FieldingMellish
FieldingMellish's picture

That's the way the Arab Spring started.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:34 | 4023880 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

I doubt many people care at this point.  There was a guy in New Hampshire who immolated himself a couple years ago over what he said was a rigged court system, it got no press.  Another guy (Stack?) flew a small plane into an IRS office building in Texas.  It got a little press, but didn't start ANYTHING.

Things will start happening when enough people are mad enough and desperate enough.  Cut off SNAP/EBT, all other welfare, and double or triple gas and food prices, then it will be just waiting for a spark.  Until then, this is nothing.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:47 | 4023934 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Thomas Ball. His name was Thomas Ball.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:32 | 4024079 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

He needed a bigger plane and better aim.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:34 | 4024085 New World Chaos
New World Chaos's picture

His long but excellent manifesto is here:

http://www.sentinelsource.com/news/local/last-statement-sent-to-sentinel...

Mostly about the government's Orwellian war on men and children, in the name of protecting the children.  Also good stuff about the "second set of books" (unchallengeable bureaucratic policies, secret laws, and interpretations of law) which are the real laws applied to the little people.  You won't learn this in civics class.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:50 | 4023950 NOTaREALmerican
NOTaREALmerican's picture

Re;  That's the way the Arab Spring started.

Yeah,  but the Arab's don't have access to unlimited (near) food at McDonalds.

That's why they hate us for our freedums.

 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:52 | 4024306 stormsailor
stormsailor's picture

they hate us for our french fries?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 20:47 | 4024494 Almost Solvent
Almost Solvent's picture

"secret" sauce on Big Macs pisses 'em off the most 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 22:03 | 4024684 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

They hate us for our FREEDOM Fries you pinko commie liberal frenchie.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:38 | 4024092 Winston Smith 2009
Winston Smith 2009's picture

Greece: Man In Debt Sets Himself On Fire (9/16/11)

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/09/16/greece-man-fire-debt_n_966956.html

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:11 | 4024182 odatruf
odatruf's picture

The relative timing is about right. So we should expect the EU bailout when?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:29 | 4023850 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

WE MUST BAN GASOLINE, CONTAINERS, AND MATCHES!!!

It's for the children!

No decent person would want any of those things!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:58 | 4023943 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Tried to buy a gas can lately?

The new ones have Rube Goldberg like contraptions on the nozzle to "ensure safety".

I predict a booming market in vintage gas cans with regular spouts that are not Darwin Award inductee proof.  Check out the gas cans at the hardware store, unbelievable contraptions.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:07 | 4024007 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

Yes, owning a lawnmower I also own a gas can.  And yes, they suck.  I would imagine most people just take off the useless nozzle contraption and pour gas out of the can itself, likely spilling much more than they would have with a decent nozzle and completely defeating the purpose of the "anti-spill" design.  Your federal government in action as usual.

I suppose we will now have a 7-day waiting period (21 in Kommiefornia) for buying gas cans.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:17 | 4024041 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Got a permit for those Assault Gas Cans, Serf?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:28 | 4024070 HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

The 5 gallon nato steel cans were recently selling for $60+.  You can no longer legally store gas in them.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:27 | 4024234 IndyPat
IndyPat's picture

Harbor Freight has 5 gallon red steel Gerry cans....made they way God intended. Shocking thing is, unlike damn near everything else in HF, this one is US made. Although...it's made in Chicago instead of China...so...well...you know.
It still comes with the "douche" nozzle you described, but it will perfectly fit GI can surplus noozles.
Edit: identical to NATO ...$35frns

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:58 | 4024325 Isotope
Isotope's picture

I have some of these 5 gallon cans in red:

http://www.vpracingfuels.com/containers

Heavy duty,empties fast even with the optional spout.

I like Gerry Cans, but with all the ethanol in gas these days, I worry about corrosion in steel cans. You could use Marine Stabil in them (which I do anyway in my plastic cans) to help avoid the corrosion problem.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:15 | 4024561 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

They WERE manufactured in my state until a DA runner up filed a law suit & won. Not only are they a pain, they're twice the cost. I had a spout break on one of mine. Found a replacement on AMZN that I couldn't find anywhere else.

I believe 5 gal are exempt.

Sat, 10/05/2013 - 05:15 | 4025219 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Try these guys or find 'Elisgeneralstorellc' on Ebay...(not affiliated with either)

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:30 | 4023852 Skateboarder
Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:29 | 4023853 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

This just in from CNBC...."Obama is walking a LITTLE faster now BACK to the White House."  More as we get further details.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:32 | 4023861 Jethro
Jethro's picture

Ah, I was hoping for Alicia Keys...

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:18 | 4024040 Sid James
Sid James's picture

This guy is on fire?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:18 | 4024047 robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

She has something to do with a black Barry going down?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:31 | 4023862 Ignatius
Ignatius's picture

Does ObummerCare cover self-immolation? 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:41 | 4023914 Running On Bing...
Running On Bingo Fuel's picture

The man, the man, the man is on fire'a,
we don't need no 'bama care let the mutha fucka burn,
burn mother fucka burn.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:02 | 4024157 Rogue Trooper
Rogue Trooper's picture

Good point.  If the answer is 'yes' then Actuaries have really fucked up cause this is just the start.

Whocouddanod?

Old Actuarial joke..... Guessing to four decimal places.  Tell that to one they really hate it :)

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:32 | 4023864 odatruf
odatruf's picture

Just awful. Too bad it won't matter to anyone in DC. They will say the guy was sick and deranged, and they'll go about their fucking thieving and self-obsessed ways.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:32 | 4023865 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Retarded Buddhists.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:04 | 4024000 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Fuck you

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:08 | 4024012 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Now that you've made me think about it, he probably wasn't a Buddhist, seeing as this is America and whatnot.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:54 | 4024665 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

But if a black woman hates Obama is she a racist??

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:31 | 4023868 Rastadamus
Rastadamus's picture

Obama!!!!!!! IT'S YOUR FAULT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A LACK OF LEADERSHIP KILLED THIS MAN AND BURNT HIM ALIVE

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:42 | 4023911 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

"If I had a half-brother who got necklaced african-style, he would look just like ___."

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:47 | 4023929 Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

Yeah, but he is illegitimate, so...
He’s got that going for him, witch is nice.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:51 | 4023953 Alethian
Alethian's picture

It can't be Obama's fault. He told us he wants to help us, that he cares for us.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:12 | 4024020 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Right!

All he wants is our worship!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:19 | 4024044 Debt Slave
Debt Slave's picture

Of course he cares about us. Just because he was born in a foreign land of mixed race doesn't mean he isn't absolutely loyal to Americans who can trace thier heritage in this land for generations.

After all, isn't he a Constitutional scholar? What else do we need to know?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:11 | 4024190 Alethian
Alethian's picture

Couldn't have said it better myself. And besides, he wants to move us forward and bring us hope and change. 

 

We should trust him.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:36 | 4024265 lasvegaspersona
lasvegaspersona's picture

One provably forged birth certificate and everyone gets all suspicious.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:32 | 4023872 Rastadamus
Rastadamus's picture

Bullish for gascans.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:33 | 4023879 worbsid
worbsid's picture

What a waste.  If you are going to check out at least go hunting for the walking guy.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:34 | 4023883 Alethian
Alethian's picture

Boehner, that you?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:41 | 4023909 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Burnt Weiner?

That would be Anthony, never mind...

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:42 | 4023912 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

Jeez, you oughta see his tan NOW !!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:59 | 4023982 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

No way -- he's so wet from crying on himself he wouldn't burn.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:10 | 4024186 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

ROTFLMAO !!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 20:11 | 4024384 whirling tword ...
whirling tword freedom's picture

those aren't tears......

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:35 | 4023889 Moe Howard
Moe Howard's picture

Now that's what I'm talking about, burning yourself up over a closed park.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:37 | 4023893 Goldilocks
Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:38 | 4023901 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

Where were the corporate Pinkerton Thugs to shoot him or run him done?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:39 | 4023905 y3maxx
y3maxx's picture

Self Immolated Man could have been Obama's son.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:41 | 4023906 bigkahuna
bigkahuna's picture

No shit? This will be an interesting story.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:41 | 4023908 Richard Head
Richard Head's picture

Cut off the stream of government cheese for 4 days, and all this crazy shit happens.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 21:23 | 4024586 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

all the frayed loose ends...this is probably going to be a theme going forward in DC.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:40 | 4023910 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

Of course it's on a Friday , after the close. 

 

/sarc. 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:54 | 4023933 22winmag
22winmag's picture

Choot 'em! -Troy Landry

 

Seriously folks, when an anonymous nobody in Tunisia lights himself on fire it's an international sensation and the beginning of the Arab Spring. Perhaps this is the spark of the American Spring? Well, a man can dream...

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:30 | 4024071 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Not anonymous - Mohammed Bouazizi.

Not being pedantic, just tryin' to help.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:59 | 4024150 akak
akak's picture

Too bad he was not an-anonymous instead of merely non-anonymous.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:28 | 4024246 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

AnAnonymous has embraced the worst parts of US citizenism, and then added nose picking, roadside shitting, dog wokking, and enslavement of Tibet, which are part and parcel of Chinese citizenism.

It is a non sense at present times.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:35 | 4024264 akak
akak's picture

You have thrusted your US 'american' fist into the cesspool of Chinese citizenism and withdrawn the most fetid and crustiest bits of the mattering things.

Alas, alas, once more alas, upping to the zenith of ananonymystical inablity to self-indict as they are parangongs of hypocritizenism will only lead to eternal consumptionizing of Chinese citizenism misfortune cookie.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 20:23 | 4024412 Bullionaire
Bullionaire's picture

+2

 

Thanks akak.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 20:34 | 4024451 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

'AnAnonymystics' are very talented at finding new every thing else because turning to the right thing to do. So it can take time. A lot of.

It is another leap in logics Chinese citizenism citizens are used to. That is the way Chinese citizenism citizens are driven to think in this Chinese Citizenism Communautist Party world order.

No logics here. More the absence of logics, even the most twisted.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:47 | 4023938 NOTaREALmerican
NOTaREALmerican's picture

Paging Richard Pryor...  Richard Pryor,  please pickup the white fire-extinguisher.   That's Richard Pryor...

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:51 | 4023940 Running On Bing...
Running On Bingo Fuel's picture

What next?

Bouncing Betty's planted in the National Mall?

http://www.php-web-host.com/ckfinder/userfiles/images/dr-evil.jpg

It's National Taco Day, can't we have some peas, I mean peace!!

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:49 | 4023948 Agent P
Agent P's picture

You didn't see this shit going on when gas was above $4. 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:12 | 4024025 darteaus
darteaus's picture

You are COLD!  +1

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:49 | 4023949 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

He actually looked in Obama's direction from 200 yds out and they hit him with a microwave and cooked him.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:52 | 4023961 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

Was he black...ened?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:53 | 4023965 10mm
10mm's picture

Italians and Greeks, now Yanks.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:54 | 4023967 BlueCheeseBandit
BlueCheeseBandit's picture

Man, people really don't want Obamacare.

Seriously, if you're going to off yourself, do something that will help the rest of us. Walk into Goldman HQ with an AK-47, for e.g.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:02 | 4023996 notadouche
notadouche's picture

I would expect  black helicopters surrounding you at any moment with the real possibility of being rendered with comments like this.  Good luck you might need it.

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:56 | 4023970 markar
markar's picture

Where's Feinstein screaming for gun control over this? 

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:34 | 4024080 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

.

Where's Feinstein screaming for gun control over this?

Where isn't Feinstein screaming for gun control over anything?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:58 | 4023980 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Is it 'Bring a Crazy to DC Week'?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 17:59 | 4023983 Yancey Ward
Yancey Ward's picture

Did the Capital Police shoot him, too?

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 18:00 | 4023984 b_thunder
b_thunder's picture

This is how the Arab Spring started, when a man in Tunisia lit himself.  Is this a start of something bigger than what it looks to be like right now?

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