Brosurance: A Keg Standing Ovation For ObamaCare's Greatest Hit

Tyler Durden's picture


Just when you thought ObamaCare couldn't stoop any lower in its "sales pitch", it does.



and there's more...

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Tue, 10/22/2013 - 13:56 | 4080031 Theta_Burn
Theta_Burn's picture

Is this for real?


Tue, 10/22/2013 - 13:58 | 4080041 Suisse
Suisse's picture

Unfortunately, yes.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 13:59 | 4080046 SpiceMustFlow
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Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:03 | 4080071 outamyeffinway
outamyeffinway's picture

Where's the "bro's" in those pictures? Weird eh?

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:08 | 4080102 Flagit
Flagit's picture

they are the 2 thugs forcefully spreading your legs apart for the mandatory fucking/gang rape/mass orgy that is about to take place in your ass.


they will get their ends.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:15 | 4080132 BaBaBouy
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Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:19 | 4080147 The Juggernaut
The Juggernaut's picture

Wouldn't it be some funny ass shit if California Milk Processor Board sued the US government for advertising infringement?!?!

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:27 | 4080194 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

My takeaway:  The guy in the purple shirt first gets drunk and then crashes his bike.  The other dudes drink beer and then one of them drunk dials his mommy.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:27 | 4080199 SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

and the pregnant woman is a guy in drag.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:37 | 4080241 kralizec
kralizec's picture

This shit is too stupid to be fake!

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:53 | 4080302 Leopold B. Scotch
Leopold B. Scotch's picture

If it's free, I'm in, dude.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:58 | 4080315 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Welcome to the Healthcare Marketplace, have a cigar.  And did we tell you the name of the game, boy?  We call it riding the gravy train...

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 15:08 | 4080352 Leopold B. Scotch
Leopold B. Scotch's picture

Really? This is Colorado:  Where is the BONG in that setup?

Talk about B.S.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 15:18 | 4080392 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

You want BS?  I'll give you BS. 

I have health insurance.  Individual plan.  Pricey. 

That company is not offering any products that qualify for the subsidy.  BC/BS in my area will NOT offer a product that qualifies for the subsidy.

And they were honest about it.  "You can stay with us and pay what you have been paying, or leave and find a plan with a subsidy.  We know the risk we are taking in losing your business, but our management thinks it is such a mess that we will take a far larger loss if we do offer such a thing.  The only sales point we have to work with is . . . yes, you get no subsidy, but our network is much wider and if you go with one of these new places you'll have a narrower network."

That's about as bad as it gets.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 15:22 | 4080403 WarHorse
WarHorse's picture

Sorry Guy - there's no subsidy if you have a job ... 

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 15:25 | 4080411 CrashisOptimistic
CrashisOptimistic's picture

The subsidy thresholds reach pretty high, actually, but it doesn't include income from LLC capital gains, left within the LLC.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 17:48 | 4080950 drchris
drchris's picture

The real question is: What does the graph of subsity vs income look like? 

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 18:05 | 4081010 redpill
redpill's picture

I knew we'd eventually get to Idiocracy, I just didn't realize it would be today.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 19:43 | 4081260 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

i'd love to shove that keg up a somebody's arse!!!  arrrg

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:03 | 4081295 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Gonna’ be needing that Obamacare for when you slip off the handles of that keg because you are drunk and then impale yourself on the tap.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:50 | 4081391 Syrin
Syrin's picture

No wonder there is a seccessionist movement.   These f-tards are going to not make it past the first week of the currency collapse.   Where are all the bros from the hood in that pic?

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 21:52 | 4081523 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

no self respecting negro is going to pay for their free healthcare, so no need to advertise to them

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 22:09 | 4081568 mjcOH1
mjcOH1's picture

"Where's the "bro's" in those pictures? Weird eh?

they are the 2 thugs forcefully spreading your legs apart for the mandatory fucking/gang rape/mass orgy that is about to take place in your ass.

they will get their ends."


It's just the tip, dude.  Relax.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 22:55 | 4081672 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Got "papers"? - Nurse Stasi

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 23:47 | 4081766 BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

Also, notice the 'devil horn' hand sign from the guy on the right...




Not to mention, why are the shoes of the guy in the air German, i.e, Adidas...why not American i.e, Nike?

Wed, 10/23/2013 - 00:18 | 4081823 HardlyZero
HardlyZero's picture

...and I think the guy in the middle is getting setup for the Beer Enima...he has the injector in his mouth.

Its not clear drunken students going over rocks or rope climbing will lead to 'safe behavior'.

Paying $500/month for insurance is at least 5 kegs a month...down the drain.  

EMPTY KEG plan ?

Wed, 10/23/2013 - 00:23 | 4081829 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Considering the history of the ChoomMiester, these guys will provide a leadership improvement if the country is still around in 15 or 20 years.

Wed, 10/23/2013 - 01:26 | 4081902 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Sure, country is be around, but citizenry is speak mish mash Spanish and Chinese like Blade Runner.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 15:41 | 4080478 ronaldawg
ronaldawg's picture

Subsidy is a joke anyways - most plans have a $6,000 and above deductible.  So you get pay for insurance to pay more for healthcare.  There is even a substantial deductible on prescription meds.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 18:08 | 4081020 The Gooch
The Gooch's picture

Cloward-Piven School of Engineering.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 19:48 | 4081266 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

You can thank the Lucifarian Alynski for most of it...Fabian Socialist, another in a long line of idiots.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 18:23 | 4081075 ForTheWorld
ForTheWorld's picture

$6000? WTF? My wife (we live in Australia) pays $1300 per year for full coverage, and when she went into hospital for a pregnancy related operation, our version of Medicare paid the $250 hospital deductible required to the insurance company, and we didn't have to pay anything at all. It was all covered by our insurance. Additionally, if she needed to go back in again during the year, she wouldn't have to pay the $250 deductible because you only pay it once a year if you go to hospital one or more times.

US sick care is fucked.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 18:56 | 4081143 Calmyourself
Calmyourself's picture

US sick care was deliberately screwed up so our Government could fix it and keep fixing it forwever..  That's how it works over here lobbyists and Congress screw the pooch till its completely messed up then they fix it...  By the way how do the Aussies like the fact htat Americans pay for nearly all development of new drugs?  Nice huh..

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:04 | 4081301 ronaldawg
ronaldawg's picture

Does AUS have socialized healthcare?

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:39 | 4081364 ForTheWorld
ForTheWorld's picture

We do, and it's not a bad thing. The way it works here is that anyone that earns an income over a certain threshold (which I can't recall at the moment) pays a 1.5% tax (based on income) each year when you file your taxes. The tax has some conditions on it based on private health insurance coverage, length of coverage etc.

This then allows all Australian citizens, temporary & permanent residents (on the appropriate visas) to use the public health care system. If you need to see a doctor for a check up, you see the doctor, swipe your Medicare card and then leave. If you need to go to the hospital (a public hospital) as an emergency patient, your visit will be covered by Medicare. Medicare only covers essential services though. Medicare isn't designed to leave people out of pocket, or without health care. If you want extras however, that's what private health insurance is for.

For a better idea of what is covered, and what isn't, go here:

That page shows the differences in Australia between coverage provided by private health insurance, and Medicare.

To give some additional insight, my wife is a US citizen, and has worked in hospitals for years in the US. When she needed to use the Australian health care system for the first time, she kept asking where the bill was. I explained that because everyone pays in, everyone gets to use it whenever they need it. It might sound like some crazy socialist idea, but it works really well.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:11 | 4081313 ForTheWorld
ForTheWorld's picture

I'm guessing most of those that take prescription drugs most likely have no idea of that. Are you inferring that ALL Americans pay for nearly all the development of new drugs (through subsidies paid through taxes), or just those that consume the pharmaceuticals pay for them?

Wed, 10/23/2013 - 03:18 | 4081987 Calmyourself
Calmyourself's picture

Both, the research on this is easy and a well known fact here.  We are a captive audience to our well connected pharma lobbyists.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:16 | 4147452 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

Even if you believe that you're qualified for a subsidy, taking it is risky.  My understanding is that the subsidy for a given year is a function of your adjusted gross income for that year. 

A 2014 AGI that turns out to be higher than your estimate may be high enough to exclude you from the subsidy that you already filed for at the beginning of 2014.  IIRC, you'd have to repay it immediately + interest + penalty.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 19:01 | 4081163 monkeyshine
monkeyshine's picture

Plus what's this I hear about $6000 and $8000 annual deductibles on the subsidized plans?  Sort of defeats the purpose as it was presented to the American people. What a freaking con.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 18:02 | 4080400 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Whatchu mean I'm the baby daddy, ho?

Sheeet, gonna' go get me sum BroSurance. You seen my Vodafone?

300,000 Floridians suddenly lose their health insurance, btw.

"Leading up to the congressional vote on Obamacare, President Obama told Americans, “If you like your plan, you can keep your plan.” This promise that Obamacare would not force anybody off their preexisting insurance plan played a central role in Obamacare messaging and the bill’s razor-thin passage in the U.S. Senate."

-and -

Record 90,609,000 Americans Not In Labor Force, Employment Among Women Hits 24-year Low, Economy ‘stalling’


Tue, 10/22/2013 - 18:19 | 4081059 fourchan
fourchan's picture

you mean the government has never created any jobs? they only consume from the productive you say?

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:25 | 4081331 Element
Element's picture

Look on the bright side, the downside is only 20% of GDP, and Obama-care is staffed by consumate professionals dedicted to the highest standards of Govt servicing, accountability, and fairness. It's world's-best-practice.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:41 | 4081372 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Yeah, like Wade Rathke, what could possibly go wrong?

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:46 | 4081379 Element
Element's picture

loved the bible study down the page, ya knew that would come in handy one day lol

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 21:33 | 4081487 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Don't let it get out...I'll be ruined ;-)

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 20:01 | 4081290 Bro of the Sorr...
Tue, 10/22/2013 - 14:55 | 4080308 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

..... and the website listed in the first pic doesn't even display correctly.  Classic.

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 16:33 | 4080688 knicks3005
knicks3005's picture

The pregnant guy is George Zimmerman. 

Tue, 10/22/2013 - 18:47 | 4081121 Dr. Destructo
Dr. Destructo's picture

Looks like more like Chris Christie

The nose, the double chin, skin complexion, and the eyes are similar.

Just dye the hair and grow it out, slather the lips generously with lipstick, and pluck the eyebrows and you got one fabulous governor.

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