From The Geniuses Who Brought You Brosurance, Here Comes Obamacare... For Sluts?

Tyler Durden's picture


Obamacare - it's not just for college-age kegstanders... now available to sluts easy women across the United States...



And lest you think the brilliant minds behind Obamacare are sexist, here is how young males were portrayed a few short weeks ago - Obamacare: the unaffordable, equally offensive to everyone, with care, act.


(h/t @sarahkliff)

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Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:34 | 4146632 VD
VD's picture

whore planet. fuck off O&co. PDs JPM & GS big pimpin' the world via Fed, lobbyists and gov.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:36 | 4146648 Theta_Burn
Theta_Burn's picture

Entertainment in Rome as it burned was awesome to.. sit back and enjoy it

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:37 | 4146667 Almost Solvent
Almost Solvent's picture

Is that a mirror in your back pocket?

Cause I see myself in your pants!


Let me be your M&M.

I'll melt in your mouth, not in your hand!

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:42 | 4146689 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Eugenics, Bitches!

Do you wash your pants in Windex? - Because I can see myself in them!

Are those space pants? - Because your ass is out of this world!

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:44 | 4146717 ACP
ACP's picture

Heh-Heh, heh-heh. Sluts! Yeah, sluts! Lots of sluts! Fire, fire, fiiiiiiiire!

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:47 | 4146738 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Another clear sign of the End Times.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:50 | 4146755 akak
akak's picture

If you like your current slut, you can keep your current slut.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 14:54 | 4146776 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture

im waiting for the eyes wide shut style orgys to start...Now that we have free birth control and all.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:00 | 4146803 VD
VD's picture

Gore invented internet and ObamaCare invented cure for AIDS. /not s

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:04 | 4146828 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture

I cant remember if i took the blue pill or the red pill this morning????

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:10 | 4146880 Danks18
Danks18's picture

I guess the focus group didn't respond well to "Hosurance"

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:12 | 4146889 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture

Why would the government advertise to college students who are already on their parents plans until there 26. These people are fucking stupid.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:23 | 4146944 mmanvil74
mmanvil74's picture

"Do You Got Insurance" ??? Unbelievable that a government sponsored program wouldn't even bother to use proper grammar, but, I suppose since their target audience, ie. college students, are practically illiterate, you have to stoop down to their level to grab their attention.  If it wasn't clear before why Americans are among the dumbest population on the planet, it should be now...

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:29 | 4146980 Bananamerican
Bananamerican's picture

These ACA ads carry a distinct Idiocracy vibe....

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:32 | 4146994 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

If only we had a man like President Camacho.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:06 | 4147170 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

where are these ridiculous adds to be found?

or is that got found?

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:32 | 4147281 dontgoforit
dontgoforit's picture

What did the vampire say to the teacher?

See you next period.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:55 | 4147374 Beam Me Up Scotty
Beam Me Up Scotty's picture

Hey, don't waste your screw around money on responsible shit like insurance!!  Let US take it from someone else and pay it for you!!  Save your screwing around money for what its meant for-- SCREWING AROUND!!

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:06 | 4147421 phoolish
phoolish's picture

That's your government

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:20 | 4147471 New England Patriot
New England Patriot's picture

Her mother must be very proud.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:35 | 4147510 Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

Those tight jeans with high heels say yes

But those eyes say chlamydia

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:42 | 4147544 akak
akak's picture

Chlamydia means never having to say "Where did you get those genital warts?".

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 19:18 | 4147910 Au_Ag_CuPbCu
Au_Ag_CuPbCu's picture

I can't wait for the gangbanger add:

Bullet holes in your body can get expensive.  Don't waste you hard earned cash on medical bills, get health insurance and save all of that cash for guns and ammo!

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 19:34 | 4147964 The Alarmist
The Alarmist's picture

If you're going to make me pay for "free" birth-control for people like that Georgetown law student that Rush Limbaugh pissed everyone off by calling a slut, why in the name of social solidarity can't you tax her enough from her ultimate six-figure starting salary to guarantee the rest of us a comparable standard of living???

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 22:37 | 4148505 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Sure, paying for her N illegitimate children to go to school and ultimately prison is a much better deal for the Republic.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:16 | 4147451 Gavrikon
Gavrikon's picture

Don't we?

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 18:43 | 4147767 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

That whore can now get her pubic lice treated, and be prescribed meds for almost her STDs, for the low, low price of $85/month PLUS a $6,000 out of pocket annual deductible.

And free pizza, lube and condoms at the ZeroCare Navigator sign-up party, too.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 19:36 | 4147976 The Alarmist
The Alarmist's picture

The real question is, will she do you free of charge in the name of solidarity, or is she going to do you the Chicago-way?

Wed, 11/13/2013 - 01:52 | 4148938 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

She has polished more sloppy knobs than Barry or Barney in moments of spontaneous, gratuitous slutiness.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:34 | 4146998 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

What next, PoonCare?   Ok well that wood be catchy.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:46 | 4147066 Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

Sugar, Mr. Poon?

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:57 | 4147386 Seize Mars
Seize Mars's picture

No, never, never.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:13 | 4147001 akak
akak's picture


These ACA ads carry a distinct Idiocracy vibe....

ObamaCare: It's got electrolytes!

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 22:03 | 4148422 Bro of the Sorr...
Bro of the Sorrowful Figure's picture

with the amount of fluoride they dump in the water, the vaccines, chem trails, radiation, and GMOs in general, i think the goal is to make us all as stupid as the characters in that movie. i stay away from all that as much as possible, preferring instead to lower my IQ with marijuana, alcohol, and the occasional sniff of Bolivian marching powder.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 18:00 | 4147617 Freddie
Freddie's picture

The United States citizenry anymore carries a distinct idiocracy vibe.

Wed, 11/13/2013 - 07:49 | 4149208 Boscovius
Boscovius's picture

I'm with Bananamerican,

This has Idiocracy written all over it.  Is there a Starbucks around here?

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:34 | 4147002 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Mike Judge could not make this shit up.  Whether you are for or against the Bitcoin, ZH'ers are comparative geniuses.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 18:38 | 4147754 UncleFurker
UncleFurker's picture


Mike Judge probably DID make this up.

Anonymous WHOIS data on the domain name, and a .com instead of a .gov = probably not government run.



Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:42 | 4147052 t0mmyBerg
t0mmyBerg's picture

'"Do You Got Insurance" ??? Unbelievable that a government sponsored program wouldn't even bother to use proper grammar, but...'

See that is what makes me believe these cannot be real ads.  They simply cannot be right?  Is the country that far gone?  If these are then well fuck me I did not move far enough when I moved out of Illinois to get away from the implosion waiting to happen there.  I should have moved to Singapore like Jimmy "buy my commodity index" Rogers


Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:57 | 4147129 Overfed
Overfed's picture

They're real alright. Search-engine-of-your-choice-it.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:35 | 4147294 Beam Me Up Scotty
Beam Me Up Scotty's picture

Don't even need to search engine it. Just go to the website and click the about at the bottom of the page. It's real alright.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:46 | 4147333 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Sadly, you are correct:

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:33 | 4147506 presk_eel_pundit
presk_eel_pundit's picture

What's unbelievable is that people here on Zero Hedge think that this is an actual government advertisement. It's from a Colorado non-profit group that has absolutely no relation to any form of government. Tyler is stooping lower and lower to scam his gullible readers.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 18:17 | 4147686 TheMeatTrapper
TheMeatTrapper's picture

What's unbelievable is that people here on Zero Hedge think that this is an actual government advertisement. 

No, not at all. People here on ZH rightly understand that the average potential ObamaCare enrollee is a shallow, morally deficient, unproductive, vacuous doofus Americanus'. These posters are simply proof of that. 

These posters are a simple reflection of the sad reality of what most Americans have become. 

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:47 | 4147339 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

Because college students will be the only people out there able to pay full fare for the coverage.  They can just borrow the extra $12,000 per year for Obamacare on their student loans.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:29 | 4146979 ronaldawg
ronaldawg's picture

That liberal girl doesn't need birth control because we all know they take it through the back door.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 16:53 | 4147363 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

F*ck the liberal ones, marry the conservative ones.

I had a buddy back in college; no better or worse looking than yours truly, and actually a bit on the too tall and thin side; used to rack up women left and right; once took home three different ones from one party, one at 9pm; came back and got another at midnight, and came back to get yet another around 2am.

I was in awe.

Couldn't figure out why he kept scoring so frequently, while I had to try to squeeze blood out of a turnip (heh.)

His answer:  He pretended to be a off the charts radical liberal when reeling them in.  This guy was then and is now no more a liberal than Barry Goldwater.

Me; I still went about it the hard way, scratching and clawing for every nibble.  I just couldn't bring myself to stoop that low...


Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:20 | 4146941 e_goldstein
e_goldstein's picture

I take both. The trick is to take the blue one second, that way you are more appealing to the sluts.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 15:46 | 4147065 James-Morrison
James-Morrison's picture

Neither red nor blue pills are covered by Obamacare, until after you cough up that $5,000 deductible.

Tue, 11/12/2013 - 17:18 | 4147459 venturen
venturen's picture

Clinton invented Sluts

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