Believe It Or Not: Japan To Reopen Soccer Facility In Fukushima For 2020 Olympics

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Below we present a twitter exchange we had with a Japanese media outlet overnight on Twitter. It needs no commentary.

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Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:10 | 4190430 Save_America1st
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If you build it...they will fry.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:13 | 4190439 Gene Parmesan
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If you build it they will come

 

 

 

 

 

 

down with cancer years later.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:14 | 4190442 Jumbotron
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It's the Japanese for Christ's sake !!!!!!

It has ALWAYS been about honor and saving face !!!!!!

But now YOU get to commit HARI KARI for THEM........not the other way around.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:18 | 4190455 Frozen IcQb
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Glow in the dark soccer!

How cool is that?

Only in Japan

[sarc]

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:26 | 4190488 Say What Again
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Think about all the money they will save by not having to turn on the lights!

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:37 | 4190501 hedgeless_horseman
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So, kid, did you enjoy watching the game?

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:39 | 4190531 ParkAveFlasher
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The movie " Akira" is looking prophetic right now.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:48 | 4190545 hedgeless_horseman
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I am going out on a very short, thick, stout limb to make a prediction that geiger counters will not be allowed at the facilities.  It will be for your safety.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:50 | 4190557 krispkritter
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I'm predicting the balls on the players will be exactly the same size as the soccer balls, thus leading to very confusing gameplay and a host of groin injuries...

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 12:07 | 4190580 Vampyroteuthis ...
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This is like a real life version of X-Men. Mutants will win the games!!

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 13:27 | 4190893 remain calm
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Playing for the Cesium Cup

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 13:54 | 4191010 Dogface
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Ukraine and Japan in the finals...

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 12:17 | 4190599 Lost My Shorts
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Also predicting not a lot of stoppage time added to the end of matches.  And lead jockstraps will be the hot fashion accessory.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 12:31 | 4190637 Nobody For President
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The ZH humorists did NOT let me down this morning...

Pluses for all of you.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 12:37 | 4190666 kchrisc
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You know, with this picture you probably just gave the TSA goons an idea.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 16:09 | 4191593 StychoKiller
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Hmm, replace those five interlocking rings with black & yellow radiation circles...

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:17 | 4190458 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

that warm fuzzy feeling you feel in your guts?....

AIN'T LOVE BUDDY!!! AIN'T LOVE!!!

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:47 | 4190549 PT
Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:21 | 4190471 Ying-Yang
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In addition, a new startup company near J Village was announced....

AquaFukushima® bottled water goes through a state-of-the-art purification process so that you get the refreshment your body craves in its purest form. Our water will make your body GLOW.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:11 | 4190433 prains
prains's picture

I feel so sorry for all the young kids working their butts off to make the 2020 Olympics, what a JOKE Japan, you should be so ashamed of your gov't

 

 

FOR FUCK SAKE DO SOMETHING YOU BUNCH OF DOCILE MUPPETS!!!!!

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:48 | 4190553 Popo
Popo's picture

Judging from the exploding Japanese populations in Bangkok and Singapore -- I'd say they are doing something:   Leaving.

As usual, it's those without cash that are getting fucked.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 12:26 | 4190626 JeffB
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The Olympic Committee or whomever should just put a stop to it.

Of course it may all be moot anyway if it all blows up by then... another earthquake &/or tsunami... or the Japanese or world economy blows up.

 

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 16:11 | 4191601 StychoKiller
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I wonder if the radiation badges/dosimeters are gonna be gold, silver and bronze...

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:12 | 4190434 101 years and c...
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they can play night games without needed lights.  just watch the green guys chase the flourescent yellow ball.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:12 | 4190435 Aknownymouse
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On the plus side, they will not need any stadium lighting.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:38 | 4190530 Ying-Yang
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Lance Armstrong announces...

Fukushima's Testicular Livestrong Radiation Therapy Bathhouses

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:11 | 4190436 FuzzyDunlop21
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Why wait? You can recreate the experience by sticking your head in the microwave and pushing the start button.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:11 | 4190437 Trimmed Hedge
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Me Japanese

Me play joke

Me put radioactivity in your Coke...

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:16 | 4190452 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

I think I'm turning Japanese

I think I'm turning Japanese

I really think so !

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEmJ-VWPDM4

 

 

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:13 | 4190441 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

YES!! AND DON'T WORRY!!!

WE MADE SURE THAT THE RADIONTION WILL BE ON VACATION WHEN ALL YOU FANS COME OVER!!

ONLY 1000 EURO'S PER TICKET!!!

BUY IT NOW BECAUSE THE TICKETS ARE BUBBLING HOT!!

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:14 | 4190444 CheapBastard
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"Never give a sucker an even break."

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:16 | 4190449 Sudden Debt
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Well, I think the wrestling matches will look a lot like  THE HULK AGAINST GODZILLA!!!

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:16 | 4190457 Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

*SNORT* !!!

Well....there goes the chocolate milk through the nose !!   LOL !!!!!    +1000 Mothras

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:16 | 4190450 Aknownymouse
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Janet Yellen can not see any radiations. We are ok.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:16 | 4190453 Save_America1st
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All Olympic athletes can make a stand and boycott Japan's Olympics.  This will force the media to stop their Marxist imposed blackout of what has really been happening in Fukushima and will expose the very real massive amounts of contamination spewing out of that place into the atmosphere and into the now very dead Pacific Ocean.

It will force the governments to start talking about it and hopefully telling the truth as well and maybe countries all over the world will begin to acknowledge this mess and start working together on a plan to contain that mess and save what's left of the planet before Tepco and Japan cause a greater fuking disaster with those spent fuel rods.

Athletes all over the world endeavoring to go to those Olympic games only do so at the risk of their lives and they should refuse to go unless the world wakes up and tackles that situation with all their might to get it contained.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 12:31 | 4190643 TPTB_r_TBTF
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Athletes are sheeple too.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:16 | 4190454 Yen Cross
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     The Japs are going to Shanghai all the olympic spectators and force march them over to Fukushima reactor #4 to remove the fuel rods by hand...

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:18 | 4190464 Everybodys All ...
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Just say no thanks to kamikaze soccer events.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:24 | 4190479 Aknownymouse
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They are thinking of inviting china and korea for the first game.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:24 | 4190480 Fix It Again Timmy
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Come to the Japanese 2020 Olympics, not only will you get laid, you'll also get rayed.....

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:23 | 4190482 Caveman93
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Jesus Christ! Why not just have the fucking event in Chernobyl! 

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:26 | 4190490 Aknownymouse
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Na..radiations not strong enough

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:27 | 4190492 shovelhead
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Daily Onion?

When absurdity has a power number after it, it's gotta be true.

I think we can now consider this statement axiomatic.

This may be the historical watershed moment where we have officially entered DC Comics Bizarro World.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:28 | 4190500 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

It's easy to decontaminate the facility.  Just walk around the facility at night and remove everything that glows in the dark.

 

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:47 | 4190548 Quinvarius
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Fine if you like to fight mutants.  They mostly come at night...mostly.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:28 | 4190503 Aknownymouse
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I know I know.... We can also build a new home for the FED there.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:31 | 4190511 firstdivision
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At least it won't need electricity since everything will glow.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:32 | 4190513 cooperbry
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LOL

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:33 | 4190518 fuu
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All those extra lungs breathing in the dust will help decom the area quicker too.

Tue, 11/26/2013 - 11:36 | 4190521 Bunga Bunga
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Don't worry, the yellow card will contain the trefoil, they will take care of everything, all will be safe.

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