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How Americans Are Celebrating The "Recovery"

Tyler Durden's picture


Because there is no more impressive way to mourn celebrate the depression recovery, than to get increasingly more hammered at a 10% Year over Year growth pace.

And remember: with booze prices soaring (deflation everywhere... except in liquor), it seems nothing can stand between the average broke "wealth-effected" American and their bottle.


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Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:17 | 4269401 ZH Snob
ZH Snob's picture

drinking is an unconcious death wish.  the advertisers all know this, and that is why they hide subliminal symbols of death in their advertising.

there is nothing the government wants more than for its citizens to drink themselves to death.  it saves them the trouble of execution in a fema camp.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:21 | 4269411 One And Only
One And Only's picture

Something tells me that you're not the life of the party.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:28 | 4269427 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Incomplete charts.  Is the east coast or the west leading the way?

I want to know if knuckles deserves most of the credit, or it belongs to my own damn self;)

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:27 | 4269528 OutLookingIn
OutLookingIn's picture

General rise in demand.

Demand higher? Price is higher.

Had to get a bigger still!

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 07:46 | 4270342 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



You can't wash your car in your driveway anymore.....but you can still make hooch there......crazy world we live in.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 09:09 | 4270453 markmotive
markmotive's picture

Recovery porn. Propaganda.

In other news...the overlords have discovered that death is a myth.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:50 | 4269566 knukles
knukles's picture

Hah ha ha
Hell, I'm the reason that alcohol sales plummeted round about 10 years ago!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 22:39 | 4269767 skree
skree's picture

I'm the reason they've risen recently

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 23:05 | 4269831 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Some things require a professional to get back on track ;-)

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 07:57 | 4270350 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Yeah...Pehaps we need Professional FARMERS, Professional ENERGY MANAGERS and a Professional Government to REPEAL myopic laws to get us back on track


None of this increase in price has anything to do with the price of Grains and that Alcohol has been siphoned off to run our Automobiles. Nothing in the Price Rise has anything to do with the Government Mandate that the Gasoline must be blended with ethanol.


Of course this might have an affect on the supply of ethanol for Human Consumption.


Can prices be rising because of stable demand and restricted supply?


No. That will make too much sense.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 11:06 | 4270711 varnelius
Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:27 | 4269431 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Bam!  We lost our dog last Sunday and if not for ale and the wackjobs here on ZH....

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:50 | 4269458 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

Try not to lose hope. Keep looking for him, he's bound to turn up sooner or later......

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:12 | 4269499 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

There's a good chance once it gets cold and hungry, it'll find its way home. Keep some food out and good luck - Ill pray for you.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 07:58 | 4270356 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

I am sorry for your loss. What happened? How did he die?

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 09:02 | 4270449 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Thank you.  He ate something which stopped his organs in twelve hours.  We should not have sugar-coated it by saying "lost", as it created confusion.  Thanks again everybody, we really miss him.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 10:25 | 4270615 youngman
youngman's picture

I lost one of mine a month ago.....but I bought a new one..arriving this Friday....6 weeks I start a new friendship....

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 11:06 | 4270709 wtf1369
wtf1369's picture

Sorry to hear of your loss. One of our dogs passed recently and she's missed greatly.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 07:54 | 4270353 cyberfossil
cyberfossil's picture

ZH Snob

Vote up!

Vote down!


drinking is an unconcious death wish.  the advertisers all know this, and that is why they hide subliminal symbols of death in their advertising.

there is nothing the government wants more than for its citizens to drink themselves to death.  it saves them the trouble of execution in a fema camp.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 18:21 | 4269411 One And Only
Vote up!

Vote down!


Something tells me that you're not the life of the party.


Write much satire, One and Only?  This could be the greatest comedic reversal exchange I have seen in contemporary conversation since Archie Bunker and his son-in-law Meathead!  Nuff said!!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:19 | 4269413 malikai
malikai's picture

Alcohol away from home, so that's bar/restauraunt prices, right?

Service Economy, bitchez!

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 00:42 | 4270034 Freddie
Freddie's picture

I think they will celebrate this Christmas with cheap booze and a roadkill dinner.  The FSA and illegals all have EBT so life is good.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 01:43 | 4270111 Rukeysers Ghost
Rukeysers Ghost's picture

Mad Dog 20/20 goes well with 3 day old road kill Opossum and Thunderbird is delightful with a Raccon or Skunk stew.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 08:53 | 4270430 Pee Wee
Pee Wee's picture

We mix Thunderbird with some rubbing alcohol and have it with raccoon AND skunk stew.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 10:27 | 4270621 youngman
youngman's picture

I wonder if the Duck Dynasty guys drink the same thing....they eat the same thing

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:23 | 4269418 VD
VD's picture

secondary SIN TAX x3!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:37 | 4269444 Tasty Sandwich
Tasty Sandwich's picture

Cigarettes All Hidey Lidey Day


There is actually no way to prove that being alive is inherently better than being dead.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:52 | 4269464 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

I have seen situations where death would be a welcome respite.......

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 05:24 | 4270263 SunRise
SunRise's picture

Are you referring to Nancy Pelosi:  "You have to pass it to find out what's in it."?

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 08:01 | 4270367 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

I look at one in the mirror every morning.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:39 | 4269447 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

yeah... well... I never liked the camps anyway so... GIVE ME MORE BEER!!!

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 00:12 | 4269971 AngelEyes00
AngelEyes00's picture

Has anyone else noticed that around Xmas there are so many more booze ads than any other time of the year.  I know people get together and drink, they give the gift of inbibement, but wow, there's an awful lot of ads this year.  They always make it look so glamorous too.  Some fine woman dancing about with a drink in her hand, happy, but not tipsy.  Maybe they should have to end these ads with someone falling down drunk - then have that tiny writing that says; Drink Responsibly. 

"Oh yeah, I will, burp, just gimme anover drinkeepoo."

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 06:24 | 4270289 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Lord forbid what should happen if just one of those rascals make it out to heaven. 

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:17 | 4269403 SandiaMan
SandiaMan's picture

I'll Drink to that!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:18 | 4269404 no more banksters
no more banksters's picture

December 23, 2013: banksters celebrate 100 years of absolute sovereignty!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:16 | 4269405 suteibu
suteibu's picture

Celebrating or one last binge.  Bachelor parties might be the best analogy.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:18 | 4269410 The Carbonator
The Carbonator's picture


Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:25 | 4269412 Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

How Americans Are Celebrating The "Recovery"

...they're celebrating, not being run over by it.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:22 | 4269415 MunX
MunX's picture

Why alcohol is the best prepping item. Hoard that shit don't drink it!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:18 | 4269510 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Aaaaah, the 5 A's of prepping ... Alcohol, Ammo, Au, Ag, Amaranth.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:38 | 4269552 AGuy
AGuy's picture

"Why alcohol is the best prepping item. Hoard that shit don't drink it!"

Easy to make cheap stuff. Only hoard the good stuff for yourself.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 22:38 | 4269768 skree
skree's picture

I can't make any promises

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:27 | 4269423 10mm
10mm's picture

I carry a pint bottle in inside coat pocket. Fuck those shot prices. Meanwhile ill sip on a brew and scram. I walk to the tappy too. Yes, swig in the shitter when an infusion is required. Desperate times require desperate measures.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:31 | 4269540 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Strange times. I'm looking at buying a hip flask right now. has a nice selection.

Every man needs a Zippo, Hip Flask, Pocketknife, Automatic Watch (or an Eco-Drive, they're just to cool not to own one) and Compact Pistol as part of his basic gadding about town kit.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:50 | 4269564 10mm
10mm's picture

Thanks Rafter.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 23:00 | 4269816 SWRichmond
SWRichmond's picture

There was a time not that long ago when a well-dressed man didn't leave his home without a pistol and a flask.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 12:20 | 4270902 wtf1369
wtf1369's picture

Whatdya mean was a time?

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 00:20 | 4269991 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

Compact pistol?  Only if you are small.  Under most circumstances, the smallest thing I would carry is my full size XD, and I want to get a Glock 20.  Hell, I'd carry a 475 Wildey Mag if I could. 

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 00:47 | 4270036 10mm
10mm's picture

You will like the Glock 20. Get the Gen 3 SF, Gen 4's first yr had some hiccups. Wait it out to they correct it for gen 4. Gen 3 full size with a 22lb Wolff Recoil Spring and steel guide rod for silky smooth action and real 10 Mike Mike loads. Oh yes, Underwood Ammo for the best and i mean best 10mm on the market, price wise and real 10mm.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 00:48 | 4270047 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

(For some reason, I figured that post would get your attention.)


A buddy of mine has one, and he eschews any but full 10mm loads.  None of the pussified loads like the FBI used to use because their agents couldn't handle it.  (I'd just get a .40 if I was going to shoot those things.)  I like his, so I know I'd like one of my own.  I've wanted a 10mm for a while anyway. 

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 00:56 | 4270061 10mm
10mm's picture

Addictive. Im picking up a Tanfoglio Stock II in Jan. Upper Tier in their line up. Shoot great and very accurate. Wolff Springs makes em all for Glocks others. Good Luck and knock em dead.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:36 | 4269443 Quus Ant
Quus Ant's picture

Well all their heroin has been seized so what are they supposed to do?

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:38 | 4269446 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

I just recently ordered an excellent bottle of Irish Whiskey out of the UK (can't get it stateside) to keep because either a) I'm gonna need it or b) maybe, just maybe there'll be something to celebrate or c) both.

I don't drink for reasons unrelated to non-existent past abuse or any proclivity to do so.

But I can't help but think it might be a good idea to have some on hand.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:45 | 4269454 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

A bottle of Irish whiskey in one hand and a .357 in the other.......

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:08 | 4269488 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Oh yeah. Dan Wesson (original from MA) with interchangeable barrels, Ruger GP100 3", Marlin lever gun. All I'm missing is a Coonan.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 08:00 | 4270365 cyberfossil
cyberfossil's picture

When I moved to Washington State for work after University in Southern Cal, I asked what they did for fun after the 2-3 days of summer were over.  My older ex-Green Beret cousin said "We spend a lot of time drinkin' and suckin' on the barrel of a gun".

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:39 | 4269448 Thing1Thing2
Thing1Thing2's picture

Add high quality booze (along with guns and ammo) to your list of things hoard prior to when the SHTF.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:47 | 4269456 logicalman
logicalman's picture

Smokes too.

If you are negotiating with someone having a nic fit, could be a life saver!

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 00:25 | 4270005 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

Different kind of smoke, but I just dried a shitload of meat in my smoker.  Real smoke >>>>>>>>> liquid smoke.  Now that I've scarfed down a bunch of the jerkey, I think I'll wash it down with some rot gut whiskey. 

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 07:58 | 4270357 cyberfossil
cyberfossil's picture

That homemade jerky is some good shit, Maynard!   But maybe up your budget a bit on the whiskey and you will feel SO MUCH BETTER in the AM.  It's a couple bucks between the rot gut and some 6 year aged stuff that will allow you to live more comfortably into the dawn of the FEMA camp. 

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 11:47 | 4270830 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

If you're going to get rot gut whiskey, go with Canadian whiskey.  While single malt scotch is the best stuff when you aren't worried about price, cheap Canadian whiskey is just fine if you cannot afford a good single malt, or if you simply plan on drinking so much that you'd be wasting the good single malt.  Rot gut bourbon or cheap scotch will kill you the next morning though. 

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:45 | 4269452 tradingdaze
tradingdaze's picture

One can only wonder in awe on the increase in weed consumption.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:32 | 4269537 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture



If you are a parent that wants to do more than just wonder, this is a good place to start.

Beyond the Yellow Brick Road: Revised
Bob Meehan, $    20.00
All teenagers are going to be exposed to drugs, most are going to try drugs,
many will become addicted, some will want help for themselves or
others.  This book can help.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:54 | 4269578 knukles
knukles's picture

To paraphrase Judy Garland:

"Somewhere over the rainbow, I'll get high..."

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:43 | 4269453 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

I am sick of these bullshit graphs. The second graph is self serving. The left and right axis do nopt corelate in reality.

THe FED assets have increased by almost 400% whereas liquor prices have increased by just over 50%, So how do the two move in lock step?

The first graph illustrates the reality well enough without the second graph.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:48 | 4269459 logicalman
logicalman's picture

I think you need a drink!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:50 | 4269568 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

Thanks buddy. Are you shouting?

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:07 | 4269481 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

PeterPan, I think you need to go blow off a little steam with TinkerBell, you're being a little too analytical there.

Isn't it interesting to note the correlation even though the axis' do not represent the same increase with each other?

The wheels fell off in Sept. 08 and you can clearly see that the salve that was applied to the madness matched the elixir of CTRL-P-dil concocted by the FED.


Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:15 | 4269505 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

There's probably a lot of charts that correlate highly with Fed Assets.  Like people who no longer give a fuck.  I bet that's up at least 300%.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 03:09 | 4270180 Pareto
Pareto's picture

I take my earlier post back.  +1 THIS is the best post I have read all weekend.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:53 | 4269465 no life
no life's picture

Liquor, Beer and Wine... is the flashing sign I see.


Sun, 12/22/2013 - 19:54 | 4269466 drstrangelove73
drstrangelove73's picture

I am definitely drinking more and earning less.
Obviously I don't work in the banking industry.
It does drive me nuts with the"Oh,the economy is growing," meme/ bs constantly from the ancient media.I run a business,I deal with people who own/ run businesses-this 'recovery' bs is NOT happening

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:19 | 4269508 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

OUR recovery isn't happening.  THEIRS is going just fine.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 03:51 | 4270171 Kelley
Kelley's picture

When the shills on TV or radio say there is a recovery, maybe it's my imagination, but there appears to be something in the timbre of their voice that whispers, "O God if I don't say this, they'll fire me, and in this sh!thole economy I'll never get another job!"

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:01 | 4269473 MollyHacker
MollyHacker's picture

Drink up
2014 is looking like the year of globalized overnight 'Bail in'

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:03 | 4269479 djsmps
djsmps's picture

If I buy a case (6 bottles) I get a discount of 20% off the sale price, making the liquor just slightly more than I paid 13 years ago. Hell yes, I'll buy a case.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:08 | 4269483 no life
no life's picture

Naked Women..

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:09 | 4269490 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Respect the classics.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 20:16 | 4269506 Jameson18
Jameson18's picture

One up arrow for NAKED WOMAN.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 21:14 | 4269622 h0oS
h0oS's picture

Vintage wine, fine ale and various nectars coarse through these veins, tis the season to be merry, fuck the credit card and state. I've got guns, food, gold, silver, Myrhh and Frankincense bring it on!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 21:46 | 4269665 22winmag
22winmag's picture

I bought a boatload of liquor for barter in the near future. People are going to need a stiff drink after a long day of battling zombies.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 23:12 | 4269849 nickt1y
nickt1y's picture

Buy a still ..then they will keep you around..

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 21:57 | 4269683 Teknopagan
Teknopagan's picture


alcohol makes the personality soluble

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 22:08 | 4269698 adr
adr's picture

I saw legal moonshine being sold in mason jars in the liquor store for $24 and nearly shit my pants. Twenty four dollars for a tiny jar of hillbilly whiskey? God somebody is laughing all the way to the bank.

You could buy good Scotch for $25 a few years ago. Now a small bottle of shitty Parrot Bay rum is $14. Even paint thinner labelled as Vodka in a plastic bottle is like $10. The stuff that used to be $3.

Af least PBR is still $.25 a can in the 32 can case. But if you want to forget who you are for a while you can't go wrong with a good Belgian trippel for $6. Some of the abbey ales go straight to numbing the brain. At least that is what I hear. Thanks to my Belgian and Scottish roots, the amount of alcohol it takes to get me plastered is one shot past death.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 03:04 | 4270179 Pareto
Pareto's picture

+1  best post i read all weekend!  made me smile.....especially this: But if you want to forget who you are for a while you can't go wrong with a good Belgian trippel for $6.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 05:41 | 4270193 Manipuflation
Manipuflation's picture

LOL, but you ain't getting any PBR .25 a can.  I would know about something like that.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 08:42 | 4270422 Reader1
Reader1's picture

Buy it up now while you can-it will be a valuable trade item in the near future!

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 22:15 | 4269710 no life
no life's picture

Nucky Thompson..

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 22:41 | 4269777 CheapBastard
CheapBastard's picture

Malls are packed this weekend with 'window shoppers'...not many Buyers though.

Sun, 12/22/2013 - 23:29 | 4269892 Reaper
Reaper's picture

The government is raising prices because it loves us and wants to reduce our consumption of alcohol.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 08:39 | 4270419 Reader1
Reader1's picture

Sayyy, you remind me of that Ben Franklin quote! 

Taxes are proof that government loves us and wants us to be happy!

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 01:15 | 4270084 HUGE_Gamma
HUGE_Gamma's picture

plug for SAM

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 02:36 | 4270155 U4 eee aaa
U4 eee aaa's picture

apparently the Brits don't need to use recovery as an excuse. Friday night is reason enough

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 03:44 | 4270201 Manipuflation
Manipuflation's picture

I would love to be in the business of importing cheap, but high quality, Russian vodka but I get no help from my Russians.  They tell me it is a good way to end up dead.  They are so full of shit those Russians, I will just get it through the Ukrainians then.   

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 04:11 | 4270222 Notarocketscientist
Notarocketscientist's picture

Want to take down corporations? 

Do this:


Retailers are zeroing in on high-frequency returners like Paula Cuneo, a 54-year-old teacher in Ashland, Mass., who recently ordered 10 pairs of corduroy pants in varying sizes and colors on Gap Inc. GPS +0.73% 's website, only to return seven of them. Ms. Cuneo is shopping online for Christmas gifts this year, ordering coats and shoes in a range of sizes and colors. She will let her four children choose the items they want—and return the rest.


Mon, 12/23/2013 - 08:59 | 4270444 Reader1
Reader1's picture

Who the hell is going to take kindly to having Macys email them or message them, "Are you sure that's going to fit you (fatty)?"  Customers will either leave or screw em' just cuz'.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 08:41 | 4270423 Reader1
Reader1's picture

At least milk is still affordable...  Oh, wait.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 09:07 | 4270455 rsnoble
rsnoble's picture

Then again a lot of politicians are alcoholics also.  One quality of a sociopath.  Many of them are probably sucking cock and taking it up the ass as well.  Then they get on the big screen and preach morals.

And no offense to the gays here I really don't care what you are i'm just saying.  Big diff with what im talking about.  For whatever reason I just mentally pictured Hillary with a huge strapon cock and Gingrich bent over her desk.

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 09:21 | 4270472 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

"I did not have sex with that asshole."

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 11:20 | 4270752 machineh
machineh's picture

Prolly you meant Bill bent over her desk ... then Huma ... then the gamekeeper ...

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 10:24 | 4270610 orangedrinkandchips
orangedrinkandchips's picture

Were going to Hell in a Bucket.....I think everyone's decided to enjoy the ride!


i did

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 12:30 | 4270762 Fred C Dobbs
Fred C Dobbs's picture

The bastards pouring at my local Irish Pup, the Auld Dubliner, gave me my first shot of Royal Crown to go with my Harp Lager.  Eighty Federal Reserve Notes later I was walking to Milana's the local New York pizza place for a margherita pizza.   An almost  pefect night.  The only thng that could have made it better was some attractive, non fluoridated, non GMO'd, non BPA/BPS'd, non vaccinated, non chemtrailed, educated, high IQ, listener woman would have wanted my precious bodily fluids.  But alas the last part didn't happen.  Perhaps more nascent iodine is needed in Long Beach, CA.  But the Harp, Crown Royal, and Milana's New York Pizza on 4th street in downtown Long Beach was just about as good as it gets if one just happens to live here. And I never thanked my bartenders.  Perhaps I was intoxicated.  

I do recommend developing a taste for wine.  If you are going to drink, drink something that is good for you.  Stay away from California wines unless they are organic.  


Merry Christmas Z Heads, you too ny personal NSA follower.  

Mon, 12/23/2013 - 12:33 | 4270934 Fred C Dobbs
Fred C Dobbs's picture

I'd like to think that the first and only up arrow came from my NSA follower.  Merry Christmas and remember it is government work.  A step below, or is it above, union work.



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