Inside An Underground Swiss Gold Vault

Tyler Durden's picture

Deep in the bowels of Zurich, 18 feet below lake level, lies Credit Suisse's private client vault. Bloomberg gained access to the 1%-er stash and the 3,500 safes (ranging from 5cm high to closet size). And all you need to be part of this club is a bank account with the Swiss behemoth...


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Urban Redneck's picture

And the first rule of Fight Club is...

bunzbunzbunz's picture looks like normal ass safe deposit boxes that anyone can get. Woo Hoo. Is this supposed to make me angry at rich people? Fail.

Jack's Digestible Ideas's picture

ZH, you got me good. I've got AdBlock, but that doesn't stop me from watching commercials of my own volition. Bravo.


[edited, grammar]

PLira's picture

Well, that is all good, if you can get to it. Sad to see the advertisements that leave out all the US rules on banking information to the IRS. What bullshit.

I pass along the latest and last from the DHS ADVISOR

This is a series of reports from a so called DHS insider, which you can find in the Hagmann archives. Sadly, he/she has been most-wise accurate. I hope it is a Hoax. For weekend reading, check the previous reports. It's probably all bullshit but adjust yourselves accordingly. It is a sad read. Mostly scare porn imho but good for the paranoid amongst us. YMMV


Coupled with Denninger, the Blackberry heathen who won't quit till his last dime, I present his predications of 2014:

i-dog's picture

I don't know whether that Hagmann guy has a senior source, or whether he is a limited hangout himself, or whether he just repeats the doom porn seen on so many other limited hangout sites, but this snippet from your link is exactly true:

"As often said by another of my sources, the U.S. is a captured operation. The lie is bigger than most people realize or are willing to confront."

That lie, from the very inception of the USA, and also through the source of much of the 19th century funding of the big bankers and industrialists, is so massive that no American would be willing to confront it. I have seen nothing on the internet or by published authors that goes to the heart of that lie and all of its linked manifestations. And if I were to set it out here [again], it would either be deleted [again] or I would be banned (even though it has nothing to do with Semites).

BoNeSxxx's picture

I for one would like a trip down that rabbit hole with you iDog... I recall some of your earlier stuff and it was brilliant.

Hit me up at my username @ gmail if you don't mind... It would be much appreciated.



SafelyGraze's picture

maw-maw has a big steel front door like that one in the video

18 inches thick, with the steering-wheel handle and all that

I never use it, since I stay in the basement

and the basement door is always unlocked in case my friends want to stop by and chill or whatever

which is also like those nice vaults

the steel door is only on the front

what would kyle bass call it? an 'optical front-stop' maybe


GetZeeGold's picture




Why is all that gold labeled "Property of Germany"?

Papasmurf's picture

Because if you don't hold it, you don't own it.

i-dog's picture

A bit more digging on Hagmann and I'm fairly convinced he's a limited hangout. This does not mean that his "insider" info is not to be taken seriously (though most of us here already know there will soon be a crash) ... maybe 'they' want us to know (or at least their own people to know...since they can't put any of their plans down on paper directives that might get leaked).

One snippet from the linked article raised my BS antenna before I actually got to the other snippet that I quoted above. It was:

"Do you remember former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld announcing that the Pentagon was unable to account for $2.3 trillion in the defense budget? That was on September 10, 2001, the day before the attacks of 9/11. Some suggest that 9/11 was orchestrated, in part to cover up the missing money, which is ludicrous."

That assertion is not at all ludicrous! One story, 'Gold Warriors - Murdering Liberty and Killing Hope on 9-11', that I can't confirm or reject (but I was close to some of the players back in the '70s and '80s and know their CIA connection), is that hundreds of millions of dollars of Brady Bonds linked to Marcos' gold and the financing of Russian oligarchs just prior to the fall of the USSR were due for redemption on Sep 12, 2001 ... and that those bonds were held in the basement vaults of the WTC and were being handled by Cantor Fitzgerald and Eurobrokers (whose offices were each just above the impact floors of the 2 towers). The section of the Pentagon that was hit was also exactly where the investigators into those bonds and the missing $2.3 trillion had just been moved to.

This Welch guy, back in 2006, did a review of Hagmann that also rings reasonably true (notwithstanding his "Reversed Speech" mumbo-jumbo):


"Of course Hagmann will tell you that it [9-11] was all the work of Arab extremists. He can't go a day without reminding everyone that the same Jihad-crazed Arabs that attacked America on 9-11 are also planning to get you too."

However, 9-11 Truth is a two-edged litmus test - if you're a 'truther' you can be branded as a crazy anti-state atheist (and have your real message dismissed) while if you're a 'believer' you're not taken seriously by those with a functioning brain.

mbutler101's picture

I think Hagman's point was more to say that things are planned to happen in rapid succession. Many combination punches to keep you off balance, just like Fight Club. We've been conditioned to have the attention span of a gnat...historically, negative news like that was never released on a Monday, but when you know X is planned for the next day, it conviently gets lost on the back pages. There is something like 8.5 trillion now unaccounted for from the Pentagon budget since 1996, so I think stealing money is always a given, but the primary objective is always control and moving the herd in the desired direction. 

i-dog's picture

I don't disagree with any of that. However, I'm expecting it to be more likely to be 2015 before they have all their ducks in a row for 'the big event' (MRAPs in every county; digital currency in place; TSA scanners at every border crossing; Congress and Administration totally discredited; etc). They also keep falling behind schedule, with hiccups like Khadaffi, Syria, Iran, global cooling, Fukushima, EU collapse, etc.

I'm still not sure what to make of Martin Armstrong and his "predictions to the day" based on his cycles (which have changed over time to ex-post-facto fit better to unfolding events), but his entirely plausible date for a crash is Sep 30, 2015.

Uber Vandal's picture

I listened to M A for a while, then stopped.

Look at Med Jones for a closer fit to what is going on if you will, but he did not "call it to the day (TM)"

(Note, in the link above, the 2nd from the bottom pick of his from Jan. 3, 2011 is a burning train wreck. It was a success, however, in picking every troubled area on Earth it seems though)

However, Med Jones, even back in 2009, was calling for the "Coming Crisis of 2015"

lakecity55's picture

Good catch, i-dog.

IMO, a lot of the doom porn sites are striving for clicks. The more outrageous the headline, the more people will click=revenue.

Everyone should read Ferfal's book. I have it on loan now to a guy on travel in FLA.

I got a used copy from the lowlifes at amazon.

Surviving the Economic Collapse

--- Fernando "Ferfal" Aguirre

There is another guy who was in Bosnia and he has a book, but I cannot find the website.

steelrules's picture

And what part of the CFP article do you have any doubts about?

PLira's picture

I have doubts about all Internet news, predictions and hyperbole.

Just because it's on the internet doesn't make it true.

I only present this as new information so that a reasonable individual can evaluate and analyze the probabilities and worth of the information being presented, analyze its worth and act or prepare/disregard according to each individuals needs.

I don't  trumpet this as a warning, only as information with which to consider future plans and implications of action.

Each individual should act according to their beliefs, not mine.

In essence, keep a weather eye out for developments.

Agstacker's picture

"I have doubts about all Internet news, predictions and hyperbole."


So you choose to believe the MSM?

lakecity55's picture

TPTB will have to pull  off a hell of a FF to get what they want. It will have to be absolute Chaos and Mayhem.

Too many people are on to their BS now.

If Wisconsin or someplace got nuked, my first suspect would be rogue elements of the Kenyan government.

These doom porn sites are OK for trends, IMO, like the National Enquirer was to Tommy Lee Jones in MIB.

mbutler101's picture

I'd say Rosebud has been fairly accurate and his analysis rings true. He indicated a metals smashdown before the end game commences...makes a lot of sense and that seems to be what we're seeing now. I think Rosebud is the real deal.

lakecity55's picture

I clicked on the video thinking it would be a documentary.

I am going to go watch me some Bill Still to get right again.

knukles's picture

But look how shines they are!
And that hot looking slimey personal banker!

akak's picture looks like normal ass safe deposit boxes that anyone can get.

So then, are there any safe deposit boxes for abnormal asses such as yourself?

disabledvet's picture

exactly. isn't literally tons of gold leaving Switzerland now anyways? I don't even know why that's a country still...let alone one with its own currency. Thanks for the heads up on another quality shorting opportunity. I mean no one seriously believes Switzerland will be competing with Germany do they?

Zero Point's picture

Ah fuck up. Haven't you got free bitcoins to spruik?

I still think you're a bot at least half of the time.

Classic troll.

Bokkenrijder's picture

Very convenient for the authorities in case of confiscation: all the gold neatly in one place!

quasimodo's picture

Can I open an account online?


Seasmoke's picture

I see no Gold. The vaults are empty !!!

Peter Pan's picture

I can see the day when Storage Wars actually conducts an auction of these safety deposit boxes. The bidders will of course be various governments.

bilbert's picture

Nuh Unh! - the vaults are replete with Bitcoins - they just appear to be empty!

knukles's picture

Will you open an account for us Yanks in spite of the Foreign Insecurity Act or whatever it's called if I deposit Bitcoins?


Not impressive enough?

Whaddumean, not impressive enough, I'm an exceptional Yank with my Bitcoins........

TheFourthStooge-ing's picture


And all you need to be part of this club is a bank account with the Swiss behemoth...

In other words, Americans are persona non grata.

akak's picture

"I just LOVE persona non grata au gratin, especially with extra cheese!"


I am Dick Cheney, and I approve this message.

Apostate2's picture

You guys are nimble. Please never part.


lakecity55's picture

What if you dump your serfship in the USSA and become a Swiss Serf?

A Lunatic's picture

My gold is stored in a 4000 safe vault 27 feet below the missing cores of Fukushima, so neener neener........

Xibalba's picture

sponsored by....

DirkDiggler11's picture

The ad would have been much more impactful with Grearldo Rivera as spokesperson while still looking for contents of Al Capone's vault...

Yen Cross's picture

 Does that mean I can open an unaccredited trading account in Swazzyland?

starman's picture

Still here is the problem with gold when the nuclear wars begin gold will melt and paper will burn ! Now what?

BoNeSxxx's picture

Will never happen in Switzerland... the fact that Switzerland has declared neutrality is one of the many things that had me head-scratching from an early age...

How is it that in a world of war, one country just excuses itself in perpetuity?  To accept this as possible, one must also accept a de facto global cooperative - else any country is subject to invading/hostile forces at any time.

Swiss 'neutrality' is global banker speak for 'this is where we hoard our spoils, it shall never be fucked with'

mbutler101's picture

I've got snot and Kentucky's finest bourbon running down my face as a result of your true, you can call it an immutable law.

falak pema's picture

Its been there since the Templars got burned at the stake in 1314. That Oligarchy money line had to find a safe haven.

Remember in the historical time line LOtharingia was the "golden crescent". The neutral territory between France and Holy Empire. The Swiss became redoutable fighting nation providing mercenaries during Wars of Italy.

After battle of Marignan, King Francis I signed a perpetual peace with them. They became the Pretorian guard of French kings and POpe from that day on. So yes, the Swiss won their right to peace by becoming the mercernaries of the Kings of largest european nation and the House of God.

After that, this neutral enclaved territory in the mountains started making cuckoo clocks, and Swiss neutrality and "safe haven" status was born. Nobody wanted to die in those mountain regions to challenge this warrior race for their hard earned wealth.

Now its become unwritten tradition that glints of gold, fiat clearing house and Davos Oligarchy rule! 

lakecity55's picture

I am going to retire there and get a job guarding the estate of some BIS dude.

All criminals agreed centuries ago to have Switzerland as neutral territory to hold their stash.

I better brush up on my German.

Cpl Hicks's picture

Alas, I feel your pain as I was born on the wrong side of the tracks too.

Swiss citizenship- one of the few things in life my Inscrutable Oriental Arts haven't been able to obtain for me.

AlaricBalth's picture

The Bank of International Settlements, central bank to the worlds central banks, is located in Switzerland. They have not excused themselves from war in these modern times. They have been excused.

chubbar's picture

There have been a couple of reports, Jim Willie being one of them, that there are numerous lawsuits from clients of Swiss banks for their allocated gold back. I don't trust any big bank to hold gold for clients. Everyone of them is corrupt and subject to all sorts of bribery/blackmail/threats, which is why NSA is so important to TPTB.

We may never find out the extent of the corruption the various gov'ts have engaged in but I do think that eventually we will hear about these cases of missing gold from big clients that are referenced.

Ignatius's picture

I would argue that given a big enough budget, a tight script, top hairstylists and makeup people that George Clooney and Brad Pitt and a few character actors could get in, get out and end up standing by the lake casting knowing glances at one another.  Oh, yeah....