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Dancing With The Dimons

Tyler Durden's picture


It's not all work, work, work for the 1% who are trickling down their wealth effect and saving the USA one internet IPO at a time. The following images of the Dimons suggest they find time for some fun in between market manipulation, in which guilt is neither admitted nor denied, and litigation...



Which reminds us... It's good to be King...

Forward to 1:31...


Source: TalkingPointsMemo blog


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Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:37 | 4289544 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Dancing with the Demons - Fixed it!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:41 | 4289548 HedgeAccordingly
HedgeAccordingly's picture

GODS work lol. happy new year ZH'rz 

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:49 | 4289570 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Typical rich-kid fraternity/sorority stuff.


Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:49 | 4289577 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

So... Dimon's wife is an admitted ho?

Also, who's his beau (with the matching shirt)?

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:03 | 4289596 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

The Christmas pictures where Jamie Dimon is celebrating the birth of the Baby Jesus are especially heart warming.

And now back to your regularly scheduled program, with Ben Shalom Bernanke handing off the the lever to the Times Square New Year's Money Ball to Ole' Janet Yeller.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:08 | 4289624 Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

God, this guy has such awful taste outside the fuckin office?

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:16 | 4289637 Byte Me
Byte Me's picture


Doesn't matter how much loot you have, you can't buy taste.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:31 | 4289666 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture



"Rain falls on the just and unjust alike."


Two common themes in every picture:  Booze and bad clothes.  Please tell me this guy has something else he wants to tell the world?



Wed, 01/01/2014 - 10:13 | 4290636 Arius
Arius's picture

Q. so, again, why is jamie important???

A - question mark?

Q. yeah ....

A - dah, of course it is obvious why, dont everyone knows who he is?

Q> well, right, who is he anyway ... just another well paid and fully employed plebe, but no patrician by any means of imagination ... he will be forgotten sooner than you can imagine ... his impact ZERO

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:19 | 4289647 slotmouth
slotmouth's picture

He couldn't find a good spot for his presidential cufflinks on the hawaiian shirt.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 02:40 | 4290442 Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture


Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:59 | 4289755 1100-TACTICAL-12
1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

a honest hard days work would kill any of these basterds deader than a hammer....

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:01 | 4289556 y3maxx
y3maxx's picture

Having fun while HFT does all the work

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:15 | 4289641 ZH Snob
ZH Snob's picture

why do all the sycophants have white circles covering their faces?  aren't they proud of their master?

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 04:30 | 4290490 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

They are the egg(wo)men!

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 11:11 | 4290681 varnelius
varnelius's picture

You're supposed to print them out really big, then cut out the white circles.  That way you and your loved onces can party with Jamie Dimon too!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:37 | 4289704 wee-weed up
wee-weed up's picture



That's not dancing...

That's a writhing maggot!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:47 | 4289727 FightingtheFed
FightingtheFed's picture

They have destroyed the stock market, destroyed our economy and ruined our Nation.


They should all pay dearly for the evil they have perpetrated upon their fellow man. All of them!

Eliminate the Fed now and throw all the motherfuckers in prison where they belong!

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 14:19 | 4291072 Rafferty
Rafferty's picture

Yes indeed, they have 'ruined our nation' and in a way that's irrecoverable.

As Confucius say, no good turn goes unpunished.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:03 | 4289988 TheLoveArtist
TheLoveArtist's picture

Never seen so many drunk Joooos since the last bar mitzvah I went to....oy vey

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 01:28 | 4290395 Trample the Wea...
Trample the Weak. Hurdle the Dead.'s picture

Well at least play this cocksucker's theme song:


Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:38 | 4289545 Dick Buttkiss
Dick Buttkiss's picture

While I don't believe in either, I would gladly give up heaven to see Dimon and his fellow banksters go to hell.

"God's work," indeed.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:25 | 4289668 lotsoffun
lotsoffun's picture

hey, what happened to the chubby dog-faced bitch that was sacrificied for the london whale thing?


Wed, 01/01/2014 - 10:56 | 4290668 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

If you did, you could put it in terms of running certain swine off a cliff. Matt 8:31

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:41 | 4289546 pomlad5
pomlad5's picture

is he really that normal?

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:42 | 4289561 Dagny Taggart
Dagny Taggart's picture

Normal? lol You mean like... for a sociopath?

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:53 | 4289579 pomlad5
pomlad5's picture

Yes, at least borderline. Guess what. Borderline personalities are attracted and attract borderline personalities. He must be the king for his coworkers. Would you have him for your boss?

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 13:40 | 4290969 Tom Terrific
Tom Terrific's picture

He's NOT Borderline in any sense of the word.  He's plainly a Narcissistic Sociopath.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 11:45 | 4290731 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

Just because you can't SEE all the bodies crushed under their feet in the pics doesn't mean they're normal.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:40 | 4289553 Wile-E-Coyote
Wile-E-Coyote's picture


Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:42 | 4289554 WhiteWolf
WhiteWolf's picture

It is so sad to think that those poor kids. Awe, I hope when the TSHTF, and they cant find any Dimons kids, well Jamie will be screaming, I AM RICHER THAN YOU!!


Wed, 01/01/2014 - 11:01 | 4290670 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Hmmm...lots of people ordering the use of guillotines, not a lot of people making or pushing same.

That'll achieve somewheres between diddley and squat.



Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:43 | 4289558 spinone
spinone's picture

Happy New Year, you fucking douchebag!  If it weren't for taxpayer bailouts you'd be ruined by your own bad decisions.  You're the embodiment of crony capitalism.  Thats our house on the Hamptons, and our penthouse you're partying on, and someday I hope to see us take it back!

Fuck you!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:51 | 4289572 Indian_Goldsmith
Indian_Goldsmith's picture

Perhaps you forget. JPM was not bailed out!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:06 | 4290000 TheLoveArtist
TheLoveArtist's picture

I totally agree its easy to have that swagger in the first pic when you know the Tribe runs the FED and you can NEVER fail no matter how bad your bet was.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:38 | 4289694 Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Prolly all that counterparty exposure woulda fried JPM had you and I and the rest not been put on the hook by our shitty Gubmint.
Jamie, I don't have much going on but no way on Earth would I trade places with you.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 11:02 | 4290673 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

This one's dedicated to Jamie:

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:05 | 4289994 TheLoveArtist
TheLoveArtist's picture

Nice to know the Russian and Ukrainian Oligarch members of the Tribe party Ashkenazi style just like the JEWSTREET oligarchs here in the USA.  I hear Abramovich popped the champagne bottle at Jamies party.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:45 | 4289559 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Dupe, sorry

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:43 | 4289560 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture



Such hubris invites retribution.

Tylers!  Publish addresses!  All of 'em!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:51 | 4289575 Dr. Destructo
Dr. Destructo's picture

Viking raid at Dimon's place!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:54 | 4289586 LetsGetPhysical
LetsGetPhysical's picture

I say Blood Eagle.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:44 | 4289566 loveyajimbo
loveyajimbo's picture

It would be just terrible if someone gave this mega-crook a savage beating and dumped him in the ocean with a 50lb bag of silver tied to his ankle.  I for one would be mortified.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:50 | 4289583 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Especially when a 20lb bag would work.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:53 | 4289584 Dr. Destructo
Dr. Destructo's picture

Waste of silver -I would be mortified too.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:59 | 4289597 withglee
withglee's picture

Pb is too valuable.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:37 | 4289945 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Ag and Pb can be put to better use. I propose a more fitting alternative. To one ankle attach a bundle of all the copper pipe that can be stripped from an abandoned house, and to the other ankle tie a large burlap bag filled with pieces of Chinese drywall.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 12:05 | 4290774 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

I'd settle for a bag weighted down with the paper work from all the loans signed by Linda Green. 

I know, that's water pollution. But still, a girl can dream...

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:22 | 4289662 the0ther
the0ther's picture

Don't waste that corpse like that,putting it deep underwater. Quarter him and post his parts at the four corners of the NYSE.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:45 | 4289567 JustObserving
JustObserving's picture

It's good to be King...

Yeah, good to be king of corruption in a decaying fascist state where the only moral argument is "I am richer than you are."

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:47 | 4289571 LetsGetPhysical
LetsGetPhysical's picture

I recognize those dances... the Oligarch Two Step, the Bailout Bounce and the Manipulator Macarena. 

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:57 | 4289594 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

You won the entire Internets for the day good sir. Let's skip the formalities and proceed to the margaritas.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:02 | 4289616 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

HA HA HA !! It's 5pm and I will call it a year on this post. Happy New Year ZeroHedge !!!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:11 | 4290008 TheLoveArtist
TheLoveArtist's picture

Nice to know there are other dances other than Hava Nagila one can dance at a Jewish Wedding.  It was kind of boring just doing that one dance over and over.  Bailout bounce it it, then the Oligarch Two Step and Manipulator Macarena.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:09 | 4290009 NIHILIST CIPHER

LGP        That looks like the Jootterbug to me.   FU Jamie Demon.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:48 | 4289574 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

I'd be angry and jealous were it not for the fact that I am quite happy having a real family and real friends that I don't have to worry about shitting on me the second adversity creeps in to my life; and he will see darker days. That and I have a soul. And a clear conscience.........

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:14 | 4290023 TheLoveArtist
TheLoveArtist's picture

He carries the Devil's Pitchfork = The Menorha, he has no conscience.  Their proverb says it all "Always Take"

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:17 | 4289593 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

This reminds me of Tyco's Dennis, $ 6000 shower curtain, Kozlowski and the lavish gaudy parties he threw before his downfall.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 17:57 | 4289599 Goldilocks
Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:03 | 4289619 ABG LINE
ABG LINE's picture

Thanks ZH and Happy New Year to ALL.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:06 | 4289621 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

The hotel, the casino. The Dimon Crime Family wants to buy you out.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:09 | 4289625 nasa
nasa's picture

I can't wait to see the photos where Mr. Dimon is being lead away in shackles.   Those will be heart-warming...   

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 22:50 | 4290188 J S Bach
J S Bach's picture

"I can't wait to see the photos where Mr. Dimon is being lead away in shackles.   Those will be heart-warming..."


It'll never happen.  He'll either end up President of the US or hanging from a tree - one or the other.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 14:33 | 4291094 Rafferty
Rafferty's picture

He never will be while the Fed and the (cough) 'financial oversight agencies' are in the hands of Jamie's people.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:14 | 4289631 debtor of last ...
debtor of last resort's picture

There are hundreds of 'm! Get them off of me! They don't seem to go away, in my dreams, all those paper assets, rolled up, packed in microwave foil, shoved up my ass.... i can't stand the pain anymore, i'm all sweaty at night, they even do 69's with my doggie and force me to watch...

Jump you fuckers!

Happy new year ZH bitchez!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:21 | 4289653 the0ther
the0ther's picture

Cockbag Dog-Fuckers every one of them.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 23:18 | 4289872 BanksterSlayer
BanksterSlayer's picture

I don't care if the NSA is listening to me or not ... I do so want all of these people to be out of a job by this time next year. We can't allow ourselves to be titillated by their merry fun-making. These people are deliberately causing death and misery and famine and sickness and hopelessness to envelop the lives of BILLIONS of people on this planet.


Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:22 | 4289655 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Walter, what say you get us back to the our America, you know, the one with rule of law, a working Constitution and no Fascism or dirigibles. You think you can do that Walter?

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:21 | 4289658 bobthecat
bobthecat's picture

He actually looks like a fun guy to hangout with, compared to other bankers....

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:43 | 4289960 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

bobthecat said:

He actually looks like a fun guy to hang

Fixed it for you... and yes, he does indeed.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 01:52 | 4290418 zebrasquid
zebrasquid's picture

Looks like he thinks he's the coolest kid at the Bar Mitzvah..

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 12:18 | 4290812 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Bat Mitzvah for this douche.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 12:02 | 4290775 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

Yeah, I'm sure it was 'fun' to hang with Dr. Mengele as he did his experiments on people too as long as the screaming and smells didn't bother you.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 16:49 | 4291389 Vooter
Vooter's picture

Yeah, if going to cocktail parties with douchebags is your idea of fun....

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:24 | 4289659 derryb
derryb's picture

the cub of wall street

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:23 | 4289667 Irene
Irene's picture

Did I miss the Dimon's tennis-ball bashing Christmas card on ZH?

It is not the first time Dimon, a Barnard and Columbia graduate, has come under fire this month - after she, her siblings and parents sent out a Christmas card featuring them hitting tennis balls around their luxurious home.

As for Dimon's daughter, she sounds like a special form of stupid.
Tue, 12/31/2013 - 19:51 | 4289843 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture


As for Dimon's daughter, she sounds like a special form of stupid.

Money can't fix stupid. It can run interference for it, though. I wonder which PR firm crafted the twitter response in her name.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:26 | 4289674 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

    Dimon should be on that show 'Mad Men'... He's got a glass of booze in his hand for any and every occasion.

   That probably explains why he couldn't find a whale even if it rolled over on him.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:28 | 4289678 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture

I think our banking system is evil to its core, but that said I can't fault someone for having a good time.  He looks like he knows how to do it right.  I'd party at his place. 

On a more serious note I don't blame the banks, executives, boardmembers ect for the robery they pull off any more then I blame a welfare or SS recipiant for collecting their checks. The problem is how our government has been corrupted and allows this behavior.  All fingers point the the government for the pickle we're in.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:39 | 4289942 bunnyswanson
bunnyswanson's picture

Jamie Dimon is dancing on graves of good people and graves not yet dug.  That glass of holiday cheer is the shovel.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 11:35 | 4290711 Vooter
Vooter's picture

"On a more serious note I don't blame the banks, executives, boardmembers ect for the robery they pull off any more then I blame a welfare or SS recipiant for collecting their checks. The problem is how our government has been corrupted and allows this behavior. All fingers point the the government for the pickle we're in."

Oh, so I can only assume that you don't blame murderers and rapists for their crimes, either--it must be the corrupt government that's allowing that behavior, right?

You're a fucking retard.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 14:23 | 4291041 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture

@Vooter. Yes your right I'm clearly a fucking retard.  But now that we have that out of the way, I was referring to the fact that people will push the limit of what is allowed by law in a capitalist society to survive and thrive.  The law should prevent theft whether it’s a burglar or a banker.  Our laws do not prevent this theft and that is the root cause of our issue.  There are always going to be sociopath like Jamie Dimon that are going to take advantage any way they can.  If we have sound law and free markets even these sociopaths are forced to produce for society. 

I do not condone what the banksters, or entitlement recipients do, that said, they can easily justify stealing when it is lawful.  Thomas Jefferson took part in a horrible injustice in owning slaves, but the laws, tradition and society supported it.  He was a great and moral man, but he was trapped by the societal norms, and still partook in something he knew was wrong.  Do I condone what he did, no, but do I understand why he was misguided, yes.  It is no different with the banksters, there are completely immoral people in the industry, Dimon is probably one of them, but there are also people like Jefferson who steal almost unknowingly, because it's "just how the system works", its the way it has been done for decades, it is lawful, ect.

Murder and rape is against our societal norms, has no tradition as being acceptable in our history, and is illegal, so you (whats the opposite of fucking retard) benevolent genius how would you assume I don't blame murders and rapists?  Assuming as they say makes an ass out of  u and me, but I think your comment really only made and ass out of you in this case.

Any other assumptions you want to make?


Wed, 01/01/2014 - 16:49 | 4291387 Vooter
Vooter's picture

I apologize for the ad hominem attack--I was irritated that you seemed to be advocating the idea that crimes (any crimes) are somehow justifiable by the fact that people can get away with them. On second reading, it appears that you are actually saying that Jamie Dimon et al DIDN'T COMMIT ANY CRIMES, that they merely "pushed the legal envelope" and that it's the system's fault for not making that envelope more restrictive. Ahem...if they merely pushed the legal envelope and didn't actually commit crimes, WHY WERE THEY FINED??? WHY WERE THEY FINED EVEN ONE PENNY, LET ALONE BILLIONS??? And why did they (finally) admit wrongdoing? All you have to do is answer one question: DID THEY BREAK THE LAW OR NOT? Inquiring minds want to know...


Wed, 01/01/2014 - 19:46 | 4291717 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture

Frankly I think they were fined for one reason, the government wanted to look like they were doing something about the abuses.  I'm not saying that they didn't break the law, but the fact that no one is in jail means the government is essentially condoning what is going on at these banks. 

Essentially the fed/government is handing far more money to these banks then they are getting fined.  So how can a fine mean jack to these executives at the banks, they are LLC's, so the executives still get their salaries and bonuses.  I would not be surprised if Jamie Dimon told Obama to hit them with this fine to make it look like the government was still in control.  I’m pretty sure it was just for appearances.

As I said before I believe Jamie Dimon is a sociopath, he has no moral compass of his own.  It’s a disorder just like a manic depressive, and in of itself does not make him a bad person.  Some are the kind that murder and really don’t care, but most look for their moral compass by the reactions they get from the people around them.  If the government doesn’t prosecute Dimon and punish him for what he does, and really punish by taking HIS money or throwing his but in jail he believes what he is doing is moral.  In the big bankers narcissistic heads they have convinced themselves they are vitally important to the system so much so that the world would not work without them hence anything to keep their world working is justified at any cost even fraud. It is the job of Government to seek justice and they are not, even this “largest settlement ever was a joke after TARP, ZIRP and QE.

As Bastiat discusses in The Law, the law should be quite simple and seek justice based on collectively enforcing private property rights, and the right to life without harm from another.  Determining those laws and their enforcement is the responsibility of government.  If we have bad laws that allow the banks to get away with fraud, it is the governments fault, if they do not enforce just laws once again the fault is laid at the foot of the government.  There will always be people willing to take advantage of their fellow man, it is the responsibility of the law and order of the land to guide them in the right direction by the threat of force, and for most this is enough, or the use of force in extreme cases.  I just can not place the majority of the blame on this Dimon guy when he probably has some social disorder, if he did something wrong he should have been guided by our laws to do the right thing, if he still did the wrong thing he should then be forced. 

My main point is the main fault of allowing the banking system to recklessly steal is the government.  Andrew Jackson saw this taking place and fought it.  The bankers fought him, and at that point I can put more blame on them, if put in the same situation Dimon might do the same, but the end result was a ridding of this nation of debt and the central bank.  The government doesn’t serve to many purposes but the ones it does serve it is vital for.  No one but the government could have righted that injustice that was taking place in the 1820’s and 30’s, and no one but the government can fix it now.  It is there responsibility and I want to see them fix it, though the people there now won’t.  We need to give Ron Paul some Benjamin Button juice. 

I am seeing your comment about the murder and rape a little more clearly now.  What I see now, along those lines, is government condoned rape and murder, I can protect myself with a fire arm, but that doesn’t fix things for all the other victims.  If government condoned rape and murder was taking place I would be most mad at the government for not having laws that forbid it or enforcing the laws that would.  That’s not to say that I would not despise the murders and rapist, but if allowed there will always be people willing to perform those despicable acts.  That is why we determine our collective morals protecting life liberty and property, codify them, and then enforce them.

Good discussion though, sorry it got a little rude there. 


Thu, 01/02/2014 - 00:31 | 4292495 Vooter
Vooter's picture

"There will always be people willing to take advantage of their fellow man, it is the responsibility of the law and order of the land to guide them in the right direction by the threat of force, and for most this is enough, or the use of force in extreme cases.  I just can not place the majority of the blame on this Dimon guy when he probably has some social disorder..."

Well, I guess this is where we disagree, because while there will always be people who are willing to take advantage of their fellow man, there are many, many more who, if given the choice, will NOT take advantage of their fellow man. Unless you're legally insane and don't know right from wrong, you have a CHOICE as to whether or not you take advantage of other people and/or break the law. It's not that complicated. It doesn't matter how well a law is written, or how well it's enforced--you either break the law, or you don't. It's NOT the responsibility of the law to "guide" people in the right direction--it's the responsibility of those subject to the law to OBEY the law! If I own a home, and I forget to lock the door or turn the burglar alarm on and the house is burglarized, guess what? They don't arrest ME--they arrest the burglar, regardless of how easy it was for him to commit the crime. The fact that the SEC isn't enforcing its laws doesn't mean the laws don't exist, or that they're there to be broken. Sorry...but yes, good discussion...

Thu, 01/02/2014 - 08:11 | 4292777 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture


I will use your murderer since it is a clear evil.  Is it more of an atrocity to have a person willing to murderer (inevitable in my opinion) or a nation that condones murder? Think of Cambodia, countless African Nations, Stalinist Russia and Nazi Germany.  There is no question that a Ted Bundy or Jeffery Dahmer are evil men but the above regimes in my eyes are worse. 

I believe fractional reserve banking, at its core is fraud.  Though to me it is clear that it is fraud the government, through bad law, allows it to continue… for our entire history.  Due to this fraud banking panics took place throughout the 19th century, they attempted to patch this in the late 19th century with interconnecting the banks.  This did not work, because once again at its core it was fraud.  They continued with these patches with the federal reserve in 1913, FDIC insurance and banking regulation in the 30’s, Brenton woods in the 40’s, shutting the gold window in 1971, The Housing and urban development act, ever lowering interest rates, longer loan terms, and now ZIRP and QE.  All of these patches failed, not because of the people at the banks, but a failure of the government to write a just law, it was easy, 100% reserves from the beginning.  Now we have gone down this road for so long to go back to that will be very painful.

As far as the codified laws the banks are breaking, if the SEC does not prosecute them it is no different than telling these bankers that we really don’t think the laws should be there in the first place.   It is no different if the penalty doesn’t fit the crime, if the government bails out and hands money to JP Morgan to the tune of 100 billion and then fines them 10 billion it is no different then the government saying they don’t believe in the laws or not having them there in the first place.

Once again the responsibility is seated squarely at the foot of government. 

I think these people in the banking system are more like Thomas Jefferson then Ted Bundy though.  There is no doubt that what Thomas Jefferson did was wrong in owning slaves, and he even knew it was wrong.  He continued it because his father had slaves, his fathers father had slaves and the way Monticello operated it was necessary to keep this injustice going.  I’m assuming he could not foresee what it would be like to operate it any other way.  Fractional reserve banking has been with us for centuries, these bankers grew up with it, were educated in how it works, spent their entire careers in it, and they also feel that for our system to work this form of banking must continue.

Monticello would have worked fine with freed slaves working for a wage, after an adjustment period, and, our capitalist system would work fine without the frauds of the banking system, but those that benefit from it have a hard time seeing that.

I am by no way saying Dimon is a good guy but the main fault is government.

Once again I’m fine to agree to disagree, but most of the people on here are the ones who “get it” and though we can do some infighting, if we want things to change we need to show a unified front to the rest of the nation.  We need to prove that organizing us is not like herding cats.  I guess that is why the Fucking Retard comment got under my skin.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 14:38 | 4291101 Rafferty
Rafferty's picture

Yes, but it's the Jamie Dimons of this world that have made the Government what it is. 

Thu, 01/02/2014 - 09:29 | 4292850 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture

Andrew Jackson didn’t let the bankers push him around.  The government has the responsibility and authority to put the Jamie Dimon’s of the world in place, that is all they should need.  At least if they have integrity, which our government is clearly lacking.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:31 | 4289683 J S Bach
J S Bach's picture

Enjoy yourself in this life you bastard... because the afterlife will be eternal... Hell.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 12:16 | 4290801 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

He will .. but before he goes he's gonna make sure as many in this world go to hell before they die first. 

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:33 | 4289692 LukeWorm
LukeWorm's picture

Bunga Bunga!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:36 | 4289695 Goat Cheese Please
Goat Cheese Please's picture

O la O la aayy.  Is he dancing the Kid n Play?

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:35 | 4289700 Jack Burton
Jack Burton's picture

The 1% have, by and large, convinced the majority of Americans to accept the new economic model, the model called Neo-liberal economics that came out of the Chicago school of economics. This has been in effect for over 30 years now, the 2008 crisis was the culmination of this school of economics. The 1% own the media and they own congress. They use their control of the media, politics and even education to sell the idea that, as the 1%, they have worked harder, are smarter, are more productive, and add more value to the economy and society than they take in pay, bonuses and dividends.  They say that they are capitalists engaged in a free market competition and have proven to be the winners by fair economic competition. They claim government is their enemy, always trying to take their wealth and talk them down, regulating them and causing a drop in economic wealth by not freeing them up to create jobs. They control much of the public thought in America. Thus any talk of taxes on the 1% are met with people going ballistic over socialism and the usual stick. ZH goes off like a bomb when any mention of taxing or regulating America's finacial elites arise.

So, if you believe that the globaization, financializtion and degregulation of the last 30 years and the 2008 bailout of their failed economic performance, is real capitalism, as I gather most do, then what is there to be angry about? The 1% has record incomes, record low tax rates, record stock prices and record corporate profits. Would anyone argue the 1% has not gotten what they have earned? Even under the socialist Obama, 95% of every dime of income increase has gone to the 1%. If this is socialism, please educate me as to what the fall of Obama and the rise of a business friendly president will bring forth in the form of tax law, business regulations and banker's power.

As I see it, we went through a revolution from above over 3 decades ago. Today America is a model of what thet revolution intended. It was their victory abd now they reap the fruits of it. Yet, people can't see it. They still believe congress and Obama are socialists stealing the wealth of the productive 1%. If so, I fail to understand how the 1% can hold so much wealth, have such lucrative stock portfolios, have such record corporate profits and have had THEIR banking institutions bailed out by taxpayers and to have suffered no real regulation of the banking that caused 2008. In fact, 2008 was child's play, the elite 1% now has recreated the sitution before the collapse to an even grater degree, only NOW, government has no money or prospect of being able to bail them out a second time when the funny money printing runs out.

Is this really socialist America as FOX tells me? What will the new republican president replace the Bush/Obama model with? More of the same I think, only worse levels of more of the same. If the 1% are being badly done to by the 99% of Americans, then we should restructure the economy and government to right our wrongs to the 1% and create a freer system for them to prosper.

If you read all this, you can tell I really doubt the 1% are being badly treated, or that Obama is socialist. I know what socialism is, I had been to communist and socialist countries in the late 80's, I know what that looks like, and what average people said about it. America in 2013 is anything but a socialist country. Unless you think a few social insurance programs like SS and Medicare, which people pay for in taxes for 40-60 years before htye collect any benefits, is rank socialism. If you think that, then we are on different levels of understanding wiht little common ground.

Anyways, Happy New Year to all ZH 'ers. I enjoy reading most comments and I accept that some people do not like my comments, I can live with that. I expect any opinion I post to be open to correction or criticism. That is fine with me, I hope for another year of intersting stories and comments here. It is going to be one hell of a year, I can tell you!

Gott Nytt År Allesammans!  Happy New Year Everybody!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 19:07 | 4289763 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture

I’m sorry I’m not feeling your rant.  We are not a free market capitalist country that is for sure.  Socialism is a mix of communism and capitalism, that is what we have.  So you say we don’t have socialism but that is exactly what we have with a bit of fascism for good measure.  You act like just because the rich are getting richer we have capitalism but do not the richest in a communist society also reap all of the rewards.

You are right the top 1% or actually the top .5 to.1% is making out like bandits and do not for the most part earn what they take in.  Some do deserve it (Jobs Tesla ect), but most don’t, particularly the bankers, that’s pretty much just theft.  It is the productive classes the top 70-99.5% maybe 50-99.9% that are getting screwed, the ones we depend on, doctors, engineers, master electricians machinists welders plumbers ect, pilots, dentists, miners, farmers, managers ect.  Both the bottom 50 (and like the top .5% some of them are pulling their weight) and the top 1% are milking the productive classes.  Those productive classes are being strained because the incentive for them to continue to produce, their own production, is being stolen from them.  To be even more specific it is being stolen by the government and given to those that work in the government, entitlement recipients, and contractors, and is being stolen by the financial system and given to the executives, board members and to their employees.

 I felt I needed to comment because I think you were missing the point, at least in your rant, of what the main problems are.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 22:35 | 4290163 the0ther
the0ther's picture

Socialism for the rich yeah. You claim anything else and I call you a liar. Shame on you. 

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 06:59 | 4290548 bwh1214
bwh1214's picture

How did you get three thumbs up, I’m not even really sure what you were saying.  My view may be off but I am certainly not a liar.  I like zerohedge comments because they are usually well written and make good points but I’m having a hard time with yours.  What exactly are you saying? 

It seems as if you are saying the socialism we have that takes from the upper middle and gives to the rich is correct, but the socialism we have that takes from the upper middle/middle and gives to the unproductive poor is not.  I don’t see how you can argue that it isn’t but I would like to hear more.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 19:43 | 4289834 caShOnlY
caShOnlY's picture

Burton, I sum up your rant for you.

When sheeple realize they were part of the great "ameriCON" they will run for gov help.  No need to worry about guns, these fuckers are to scared to shit or go blind.  To fucking stupid to even know.  They bought the Coup of govt under RAYGUN by  They clapped at his asshole speeches such as "trickle down, welfare queen, service eCONofme"  they loved Raygun's tripling of the defecit.  They loved slickWillie signing Nafta, China love affair, Graham Leach Bliley.  Bushmonger mission accomplished. 

But what made the "CON" the CON was coming home and finding the 401(k) statement showing how wealthy they would be in just 20 years.  That justified their wanton fucking bad spending habits.  Fuck the neo shit burton, let them fucking starve.  The world needs to starve off a few 10's of millions of them as stupidity can no longer be allowed to reproduce and fucking mall shop on credit cards.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 12:45 | 4290872 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

Jack, I get it and tend to see things pretty much the same way.  Yeah, there is some 'socialism' going on but it is mostly pure corporatism.  The math of globalization never made sense to me in terms of how will anyone but the 'investment class' benefit from it (those who can live easily off theri investment returns, NOT just someone with some stocks  and a portfolio who has to work to get by) yet many think globalization is 'free markets'and I don't see it at all. 

How firing an American worker, shipping the jobs to some poor country loaded with poverty stricken masses, paying some sap 30 cents an hour to make the shit working them like an animal, dump the pcb by-products or whatever= into their rivers freely, shipping the product back to the US and sell at retail price is 'good' is beyond my understanding ... hitler did essentially the same thing as he took over each countrys' government and populace, sent many of them to work camps in order to feed the war machine and bring wealth only to Germany and sustain its insanity.  I need to take a crap, where's Milton Freidman buried?  Happy New Year!

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:51 | 4289736 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

It is said that every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. Perhaps Mr Dimon will find himself on the road to Damascus one day and something reclaims his soul.

It's a new year and things can happen to all of us.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:50 | 4289968 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture


Perhaps Mr Dimon will find himself on the road to Damascus one day and something reclaims his soul.

That would pose an interesting dilemma, as Mr. Dimon has already naked shorted said soul.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 18:58 | 4289752 thomasincincy
thomasincincy's picture

queerer than a 3 dollar bill

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 19:47 | 4289835 resurger
resurger's picture

Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.
My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here.
From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.
Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money” : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.
However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year.
Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.
By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a “trading position”.
If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term – same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”.
Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income.This has better chance than finding a rich fool.


Can i consider your family as a "trading position"

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 19:49 | 4289838 resurger
resurger's picture

You will end badly.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:14 | 4289889 mobydick
mobydick's picture

My New Year's resolution is to see you rot in hell, Jaime Dimon.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:20 | 4289905 pupdog1
pupdog1's picture

You can always tell the children of sociopaths by their round white heads.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:29 | 4289920 Papasmurf
Papasmurf's picture

Who is his FWB in the nightgown?

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:26 | 4289921 Meat Hammer
Meat Hammer's picture

Barney Frank takes crappy pictures.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 20:31 | 4289932 hangemhigh77
hangemhigh77's picture

where's a fuckin sniper when you need one?

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 12:53 | 4290883 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

The snipers work for Jamie and American workers and anyone else who oppose them are in the crosshairs.

Thu, 01/02/2014 - 18:58 | 4294677 waterhorse
waterhorse's picture

I was eyeing that glass of red wine in his hand and hoping it contained a lethal dose of cyanide.

Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:21 | 4290041 QQQBall
QQQBall's picture

Future's so bright, I gotta wear shades. 




Tue, 12/31/2013 - 21:32 | 4290056 villainvomit
villainvomit's picture

ha ha ha not surprised.  Fuck JDimon. Sissy ass nyfed insider.  former board member. 

He might be richer than me but I would fight that mf anytime...


Call me pleeeeezzzzzeeeeeeeeeeee










Tue, 12/31/2013 - 23:43 | 4290258 BigSpruce
BigSpruce's picture

I wonder who the fuckn loser is wearing the kilt and star/stripes shirt. What a giagantic group of douches. Proof positive , money cant buy class. My paternal side of the family is comprised of "blue-blood" old money (that for the most part has run out). A very long line of industrialists. My family had at one time a place on Marthas Vineyard. The patriarch of the family -my grandfather  -would never visit. His reasoning was that life was too short to be surrounded by vain, shallow ,empty people with a ton of money but no depth. He hated the Dimon types with a passion. His view of people and life made a profound impression on me.  

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 07:07 | 4290554 U4 eee aaa
U4 eee aaa's picture

He may be smiling, but his eyes aren't.

And all those that are around him have those pasted smiles on too. Money can't buy you love

Maybe he needs to learn how to start giving it people who are truly in need (and not those phony charities that the rich often set up)

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 14:50 | 4291119 tedstr
tedstr's picture

My thoughts exactly......i couldnt find a face in the room of someone I would want to be anywhere near.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 07:31 | 4290563 EastCoast90
EastCoast90's picture

Ah you see, Jamie Dimon is just a regular hardworking middle class American family man like the rest of us. 

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 08:22 | 4290579 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

they white out the faces of those that do not have 24/7 security, and do chen, no personal info on the elite per regulation and law in switzerland this is forbidden, forboten, nien, nilch, nada..are they all jews? good bet they are, but no need to go there.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 08:56 | 4290603 pndr4495
pndr4495's picture

I heard a story once that Warren Buffett , a master of deception himself , said , " the only thing an investment banker brings to the table is his fee." Banking fees are charged for 0 , yes zero , ergs spent.  Can anyone , in this abracadabra presto here is a trillion dollar Federal Reserve Bank controlled world say IN TRUTH , that such fees were indeed EARNED because someone spent energy to produce something , even an idea ? LAUGHABLE 'tis. 

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 12:34 | 4290854 Black Warrior W...
Black Warrior Waterdog's picture


Wed, 01/01/2014 - 13:44 | 4290987 The Invisible Foot
The Invisible Foot's picture

Ahh an American banker that went to American schools, raised by American parents, instilled with American values and molded by American industry. This is the best we can do folks.

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 14:27 | 4291085 order66
order66's picture

Where's Chuck Norris when you need him

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 14:54 | 4291130 tedstr
tedstr's picture

Funny he doesn't look like a CEO whos compnay lost $9Bil in trading losses or paid one of the largest fines ever to the US goveernment.  Curious

Wed, 01/01/2014 - 18:47 | 4291636 Runs-With_Toast
Runs-With_Toast's picture

will someone one day just shoot him I wonder

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