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Friday Horror: Forget "Bros" And Easy Women - Obamacare's Latest Pitchman Is Richard Simmons
In order to appeal to their target demographics, the smart people in the marketing department at Obamacare central have provided us with such wonders as kegstanding "bros" and easy-women. However, the following clip - which almost defies description - shows just how desparate (or clueless) the administration has become, as a #GetCovered promo turns dirty-dancing-meets-twerking as Richard Simmons and an unknown male assailant begin to...well just watch...
As a painful reminder - if one were needed - fitsnews notes that:
In case you’re wondering, Covered California received $43 million worth of federal grant money last year to “educate targeted audiences about the subsidy programs available to them and to motivate consumers and small businesses to be part of obtaining health insurance.”
Thanks taxpayer for funding this orgy of eye-gouging hell...we will never be able to un-see that!
(on a different note, who else thinks Richard Simmons looks like David Darst?)
It's funny because you never see them together?
h/t Will
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Spectacular Gold Demand (79 Tons) on SGE in Week 2, 2014
http://www.ingoldwetrust.ch/spectacular-gold-demand-79-tons-sge-week-2-2...
Public Debt as % of GDP:
(Reagan + Clinton + Bush) combined have increased US debt by 25% of GDP or by $4.5 trillion; from 35% to 60% of GDP over 30 years to fund Cold War + Yugoslavia War + Gulf War + Iraq War + Afghanistan War.
This president alone has increased US debt by over $7.5 trillion or by 40% of GDP; from 60% to over 100% of GDP in just 5 years, and he is not even done yet, he has 3 more years to borrow and spend.
Is this sustainable?
http://i43.tinypic.com/sy6pok.jpg
Maybe your remarks were OT, but since I couldn't stomach to finish the video..., perhaps they were spot on.
Watch this one instead - same thing, no Richard Simmons
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwsDNeKqVHQ
hahaha
life imitates art imitates...
Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
I think I see what they're doing here. It's simple. You see, they are intentionally trying to induce spontaneous cancer in the eyes and brain of anyone who sees this. It's wrought with subliminal messaging and NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) to invoke ulcers, seizures, and uncontrollable urges to (if one is male) rip one's penis out at the socket and hurl it as far away from them as possible, being hypnotized into believing their penis is an evil creature hell bent on ultimate destruction of the Earth. It's so fucking obvious.
I am Chumbawamba.
LOL!
The topic is Friday Horror, and the rate of US debt growth frighten the hell out of me. Walter J. Zimmermann Jr. is an overly optimistic person with his rosy 450 S&P-500 prediction.
Video Message: Get covered. HIV drugs are expensive
My eyes! My eyes!
Pouring bourbon on brain to erase.
Bourbon (an IV drip filled with bourbon) Cures Vodka Induced Blindness http://www.ascendantspirits.com/bourbon_cures_vodka_induced_blindness
The boyzzz on Madison Avenue bug be laughing at this amateur operation...gezzzz
Sorry for the threadjump, but it looks like you guys could use a little of this:
http://eyebleach.com/
Whew !!!
Thanks I needed that.
Jannn
and that's odd because today was the only 7+ ton accumulation day for GLD. There was not one since the great drain strted at the begininng of 2013.
Richard Simmons, and by proxy, the United States has been circling the drain for a while now, but now as it slips down past the exit point, it has significantely picked up speed.
This idiotic and sick Obamacare commercial proves it.
Wasn't he whining because the O's didn't invite him to the White House and he still did the commercial? Cheap whore.
Now that I think about it, nothing about the ACA was even mentioned in this video. I guess I should review it too be sure but, forgive me, I have decided to decline a second punishment. Don't you think a few salient points would have been be put forth? No, just "get covered" as if commanding a bunch of automatons. So they actually believe the thinking human is gone and only microcephalic humans with the discrimination of a paramecium are all that remains?
Angus, I'm reconsidering you offer to join you in Canada! ;-)
Miffed;-)
Well there goes 2:13 of my life I will never get back...couldn't finish it. This can't be real, IT CAN"T!
I made it to the part where Simmons gets on the ground and pulls his ankles up to his ears...CLICK
lol! Ditto. MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, I now know that there really is such a thing as going full retard.
Anyone got some Bleach I can pour in my eyes for like a day or two, WTF Fuck was that?
http://twitter.com/EmrgencyKittens
http://icanhas.cheezburger.com/justcapshunz/tag/eye-bleach
As a young man, he (Simmons, per Wikipedia) considered being a priest. I'm not surprised. Gays becoming pretend priests were all the rage in the late 60's and 70's. And the Church, defying nearly two thousand years of Biblical tradition, let the gays in, thinking they were helping. Thus, we have the pedophilia scandals we see today.
Um, most gays are not pedophiles, and most pedophiles are not gay.
But play that red herring! He's a real fighter!
Cue Johnny Moscow in 3...2...1
Never said anything differently. But enough gays were pedophiles to stain the Church.
Um, most gays are not pedophiles, and most pedophiles are not gay.
Akak, I frankly don't know how to even classify a pedophile. To be sexually stimulated by a child who is not sexually mature is just plainly obscenely deviant to me. " Creature" or "monster" is the best I can come up with. Debating whether this is hetero or homosexual behavior is likening this to choosing the type of leather you wish to be scourged. This is one class of "human" of which I would show no mercy.
Miffed;-)
Oh, I completely agree with you. The very idea of forcing an innocent child into such an exploitive and psychologically damaging situation is truly monstrous and sick in the extreme. I would infinitely rather know that my neighbor engages in bestiality than pedophilia --- at least the animals (I suspect), unlike children, do not seem overly traumatized by the experience, and are not messed up for the rest of their lives as a result.
This is because animals live in the moment and do not carry the burden of guilt and do not relive the past. An animal is punished once for a mistake. We punish ourselves over and over again even when we don't deserve to be punished. A vicious cycle that is difficult to break, speaking from personal experience. It can be such a burden to be human at times with such a complex mind. And it's certainly a pity to watch those who fail to use it at full potential.
Miffed;-)
Um,akak knows all about being gay and being a pedophile?
How akak plays that red herring!
Richard Simmons is a jew.
What has become of our once great country?????? These two poofs make Pajamas Boy look like a real man. I'm am officially ready to say I give up and die.
Get a black rifle and bring some guests with U
I went to the Youtube link. I lasted about 2 minutes, myself, before becoming nauseated.
On the 'plus' side, I see that it has a whopping 1,320 views (some of which must have come from websites that are linking it as a point of ridicule).
I would like to know how much 'federal tax money' was spent in the production of this, um, obvious attempt to get homosexuals to sign on to Obama-enslavement. OBVIOUSLY, it isn't working for the vast MAJORITY, so WHO in this nation authorized the expenditure of TAX RECEIPTS to cater to the extreme minority of homosexuals (notice that the woman was obviously a homosexual, as well)?
Hey, if I wanted to go to a gay nightclub, I would rather do it in person, rather than look at a video of an old hag (Simmons), a bull-dyke (whatever that woman is with the suit and tie), and some hairy, skinny bottom-boi. If I ever do, I had BETTER get some REALLY GOOD DRUGS in my bloodstream beforehand (and have both my ex-wifes go with me, just to make sure that I don't start shooting people at random).
SO: WHO can I sue, to get my money back on this 'necessary expenditure'? Could it be the Senators and Representatives that voted to PASS this bill that no one READ?
I watched the video up to 1:24 when the little 13 year old boy in the red shirt was chanting "get covered".
You, sir, have more fortitude than I do.
Now if you will excuse me I'm going to go into the corner in a fetal position and wail loudly, as the prophecy according to Idiocracy has come.
Once the dumbing down process starts it just picks up steam and gets worse like an avalanche.
I only made it to 1:43 and now who do I sue to get it back.
I guess that makes you 30 seconds more gay than me anyway.
Idiocracy is now.
AHHHH!!!
Is Richard Thimmons gay?
Seems happy enough to me, for a homosexual. Did that answer your question?
That was a cheap shot on my part and you called me out on it.
I accept that.
He's not gay. He wouldn't suck a dick, but he'd hold it in his mouth for you.
Quick! Anyone have one of those flashy things from Men in Black?
Still looking for mine, will advise when I find it.....
I'd gladly take the risk of brain cancer in this case. May be this was a skit that was to be featured in the Onion. Yep, got to be it. Okay I feel better now. Those eye bleach links didn't help me at all. Especially the girl with the tattoos down her arm. Yuck! I guess lesbianism isn't in my future.
Miffed;-)
Miffed: So you're not going to bat for the other team anytime soon. Well, I do have a lesbian joke up my sleeve... it's been around for years, perhaps you've heard it before.
What do you call a gay female dinosaur?
Lickedalotapuss.
Tylers banning me in 3... 2.... 1....
My guess would have been "Hillari warmongerus".
akak: Don't get me started... again! Not sure if I have enough beer in the fridge for a prolonged mattering exchange.
Bad bad boy! Some one needs a good spanking ;-). No, I can't see myself ever with such leanings. I passionately love the male form in all it's splendor. Besides, I don't think the lesbian lobby needs my help. They appear to have power enough with Hitlery on deck.
Miffed;-)
Miffed: The Joker in me is always hard to repress.
For what it's worth, I AM a lesbian myself. I love women!
Now, if only I had the time to wine, dine and watch the sun shine in the morning.
Too late. I've already gouged my eyes out with a spoon. I mean. Dear Lord, deliver us!
I front-ran the whole episode by avoiding it altogether.
"Run, you fools!" - Gandalf to the Fellowship, holding off the Balrog in the Morea mines (LOTR 1)
Uck! Simmons looks like Bilbo after he gave the Ring to Frodo.
I think I'm going to puke my guts out.
The only thing missing was one of them lighting up on fire doing a pole dance. Oh my gawd, I was embarassed for the species sake. Milestones
gay
Whey ghey
in related news, Putin says gays will be welcome in the olympics, as long as they dont touch the kids
No different than the rules at our house...
"Get Covered" with swirling spot lights.
OMFG.
Cannot believe this country has devolved so fast.
This is a nightmare sequence, in real life.
"Horror" indeed.
So you thought it'd all be zombies and shotguns, eh?
Agree, didn't see this one coming.
they only had a small budget of 40 million to make that show...
I never understood why Christians would pray that Jesus would 'come soon'.
I'm starting to get it.
Yeah. I'm with ya.
I have lost atleast 20-30 IQ points for the 2min of Whatever TF that was.
ATTN: Space Aliens - PLEASE Get me the FUCK OFF this Planet, will work for Weed.
Think about that ... "space weed". 24 hour light cycles. For light years. My fingers are getting sticky just thinking about it.
Oh man your killin' me, damn I can't wait 'til my app for the Mission to Mars is accepted </sarc>
Look...An 18/6 Cycle is great for Vegetative growth.
But you must drop that Light Cycle to 10/14 for Optimal Dense Bud Development. In that way you will get "Sticky Fingers"
(Of course the house smells like a Skunk so it pays to put the Charcoal by the doors and windows.)
You need to read Rosenthal.
Having only watched the first minute of this video, I have determined that Jesus is officially late.
Please dear Lord, help me un-ring that bell. OMFG is right!
California...so beautiful and yet so fucking stupid. This kinda shit is exaclty why I tell my folk's I'm never coming back.
WTF was that !
And that comes on the heels of him bitchin' publicly just a month or two ago about how he'd offered to help Michelle O. with her get-fit campaign and was told to bugger off, (sorry, pun intended). Yup, it sure does seem the folks at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue are getting damned desperate, if you ask me.
the same kind of people that landed in Normandie...
the ones 'bringing up the rear'...so to speak...
WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK DID I JUST WATCH?!?!?!?!
I mean what the fuck, is this real life?
I couldn't finish.
"....well just watch..."
I think I'll pass on this one......
*Before watching the above video Covered California would like to make the following suggestions: Make sure that you are completely intoxicated, have muted the volumne, and also covered your eyes with night shades.
For some maybe many sheep
This is proof that there is a hell and apparently we're all in it! What did we do to deserve this??
You did not sign up for the ACA. And if you continue not to sign up the Sodomite in Chief will have you locked you in a room, with this video playing on a continuous 24/7 Loop. until you do.
The problem with torture is that it works.
medication time
medication time
no need for electric shock treatment
the work is done
this is your monsanto life
fuckers
flu shots
chemtrail nasal breath nano spray
fluoride juice.
become a gayman
yo goy
zombi finknation
man you are now a low sperm count a sucrolose bpa bitch
just pay pay pay.
get covered or go to jail and be the night bitch for a large fella called bubba
Does anyone else feel like they've been transported into the movie "Idiocracy?"
Not transported, just living it day by day...Bernawndo! It's got electoral rights!
Crisco: It's got what Richard Simmons craves!
My Candidate for 2016:
President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho
He was a porn star and five-time ultimate smackdown wrestling champion!!!! A great man, a great american. He will serve up a can of whoop ass if you cross him. He will stomp your ass if you don't! JOIN THE CAMACHO 16 MOVEMENT! CAMACHO WILL SAVE AMERICA................FUCK YEA!!!
Krispkritter: Very clever indeed with your "Bernawndo electoral rights". I lol'd and post a hearty +1.
Don't worry about it and go have some Carl's Junior.
Akak...Akak...Akak...?
The blobbing up is necessary!
Ah, ah, more US 'san francisco' citizenism pinching of the cans, monolizing the effeminacy means, forcing shame to the posterior, touching every member in the mattering place. Same old song and caberet dance, same old flittizenism.
Made me laugh.
(Also made me gag.)
Self indiction is a big no no in US San Francitizenism and no one should expect propagandic press Friscocitizenism journalists to point where it hurts badly downthere.
That is the way propagandic press works in US San Francitizenism, reporting about everything and focusing on profitable topics.
Pointing of lightness in loafers skeletons won't be profitable. Could even get the propagandic press less activity covered California, with unemployment rising up, it won't be the healthiest move.
Classical US San Francitizenism: introducing extortion as being done to the benefit of the extorted and through the sacrifice of the extorter.
But hey, it is self justifying.
Alas, alas, three twerks alas... the happygayism of Richard The Simmons and two unkown entities on Amercanism TV strikes to the mattering of your healthism.
Hurry and buy coverage, lest you be shuttered from hospitalism. And don't forget to buy Alien Greenspittle and Jim Cramers latest books in the lobby.
After watching this (why oh why?) I have to admit If AnAnonymous had posted one of his rants I would give him/her/it an upvote.
Now I am going to clean one of my septic tanks to improve my mood.
I was always more of a "Morning Stretch" person, myself.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mE7NGum59Vw
Gay used to mean happy in the fifties , now days is getting fucked in the ass. Funny how times change.
"If you like your AIDS, you can keep your AIDS"
Hey, I think you're on to something here.
That's it! Now I understand the meaning of the words. The whole point of Obamacare is to convince everyone that, nowadays, happy means taking it up the tailpipe whether you like it or not.
Well, it's a bit metaphorical in a sick sort of way.
Miffed;-)
Goebbels is laughing his ass off in his grave.
What has become of our once great country?????? These two poofs make Pajamas Boy look like a real man. I'm am officially ready to say I give up and die.
Just shoot me already.
Nah, we're too informed for that. 'They' however, will try just that. I suggest you take a bunch of them with you, as will most of us. Thin the herd until they start to run, then run them to ground.
Is RS really Reggie Love? What other sick fantasies can this .GOV cabal cook up to placate the masses of O'bie voters? This has passed absurd and gone straight to bizarre...
Pathetic, sad and disgusting. I wonder how much Obama paid them to do this?
Women dressing like men and men dressing/acting like women... I'm certain Obama approves.
This debaucherous society and crony criminal financial system really needs to collapse. The sooner the better.
The clear reference to seeking a vomitorium puts it in proper historical context.
MY EYES!!!!!!
Hopefully when the history books are written about the fall of the American empire, this video will be prominently featured in the section titled "Apex of Hubris".
I need eye bleach!
I've got ya covered, pal.
Much better, thank you.
I watched for 20 seconds and just stopped.
what the fuck...
I mean... standards anybody?
You're lucky, many of us old farts grew up with this shit...
Speak for yourself their Big Guy, even as a young buck I always wondered about the little guy with the big afro 'sweatin to the oldies' with all the big heffers on the TV, seemed like a little Fai......
lol...nothing says "glitchy marketing"...like having a 65yr old guy twerking on camera, to get that young & healthy age group being sought after, to sign up for some frrreeeee! ObamaCare! ;-)
Hulk: I'm almost 50 and I don't ever recall seeing retina-burning shit like that back when little Richard was popular in the 80's.
Is this what they call "Marketing" these days? Who are the fucking moron retards doing this so-called "Marketing"? You'd get more sign ups for ObarecrackCare if they simply posted photos of Nuns taking a shit.
I especially enjoyed Pajama Boy's sister? as the MC...and the "disc jockey" looked like she wanted to commit hari kari at one point...definitely a resume enhancer to the collective borg after her usefulness is over ;-)
nmewn: Was that his sister? If so, it explains why she didn't run off the stage while witnessing the horror!
Edit: Or do you mean "sister" in a gay lesbian way?
I don't know WTF it was...I think both Pajama Boy, MC O'Jammer Sis and Chris Hayes are actually ALL Rachel Maddow in disguise.
But hey, thats jus me, you be the judge ;-)
http://minx.cc:81/?post=217445
Fuck it, I'm just getting as far away from these assholes as possible. I look forward to watching them eat themselves.
PS: That photo was truly bizarre!!
Please Angus, I know it looks really bad. I'm horrified myself. But, really some of us are still sane in America. Damn, I'm too honest and did use the word "some". I guess I just need to apologize for the sheer absolute garbage that is endlessly pouring out of our country. For that, I am truly sorry.
Miffed;-)
Something tells me I'm ahead of the game for not knowing who "Pajama Boy" is.
Akak, we have enough stress and horror dealing with the day to day lunacy emanating from Mordor. You really don't need to add to the putrefaction pile. The contents of this thread are more than enough to digest for a lifetime. In this case, ignorance really is your friend.
Miffed;-)
Oh...you simply must behold the pajama onsie wearing ObamaBot who, unsure of its own individuality, competence & importance, when beseeched by millionaire citizen citizenisms of the Bloomberg variety, answered the clarion call of patriotic duty called statism...to interject himself? into a holiday season having nothing to do with anything, but himself.
It was a remarkable bit of narcissism...
http://pjmedia.com/victordavishanson/pajama-boy-nation/
OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD nmewn nooooooooooooo! Friends don't let Friends observe such hideousness in all it's glory. Isn't a description enough? How are we to fight for this country when we are so demoralized realizing it isn't worth fighting for.
Miffed;-)
A picture is worth a thousand words ;-)
Miffed: No need to apologize for retrardation that is not yours to claim. I know you are not retarded, stooopid, or whatever.
You're just Miffed!!!
LOL!
As always, missing you and Mr.
Thanks Angus. You did make me feel better. I'm just so embarrassed this shit is even happening. Yeah, I think it's time to change my screen name from Miffed to "Pretty Pissed Off". Miffed is just too much of an understatement now. Miss you too and hoping we can do something this summer.
Miffed;-)
True dat. I have to pay 9.95 a month to shittingnuns.com to see some of that. Worth it, but I would rather get my porn subsidized than support this sort of disgusting behavior from the gov.
O.K., @'Hulk', I can't resist...
As Lou Ferrigno, were you born Greek, or did you learn it?
Democracy (whether it be Greek or otherwise) is two wolves and a sheep arguing over what's for dinner. TELL me you weren't the 'sheep'!
What's the favorite pickup line in a gay bar?
"Hi. Do you mind if I push up your stool?"
Greek motto. " Never leave your friends behind ".
Sack up man. Force yourself to watch start to finish. This is real and it remains so even if you can't bear to see it. Better for you to see it and know it than to stick your head in the sand pretending it does not exist.
O's personal Olympic "bobbin team".
Did he say ED is covered? Haha.
after watching that Viagra won't work, it will take a steel rod.
Muslims are specifially exempt for having to enroll in Obamacare and from paying the IRS penalty.
Did you hear that from Rush Limbaugh or Glenn Beck? It is NOT the situation. It has, however, been glommed onto by the usual suspects.
"RELIGIOUS CONSCIENCE EXEMPTION — Such term shall not include any individual for any month if such individual has in effect an exemption under section 1311(d)(4)(H) of the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act which certifies that such individual is a member of a recognized religious sect or division thereof described in section 1402(g)(1) and an adherent of established tenets or teachings of such sect or division as described in such section."
Now please do show me ANYWHERE in the ACA where it says ANYTHING about Muslims. Either your post was mendacious (as are Beck's) or ignorant in the literal sense. You might as well say that Christians, Buddhists, and Hindus are "specifically exempt".
You ought to be better informed.
As much as I believe that the ACA is a 'gift' from Hell, you're flat out wrong. The language of the bill may have used a word ("dhimmitude") that has putatively Islamic origin, but when viewing it in full context it was not used to denote "Muslim" any more than the use of the word "crusade" denotes Christian. It's a word. A fucking word. Of course useful idiots do manage to contort it.
Btw if I was a government that was at odds with Islam, then I'd surely manage to do whatever I could to get the hoi polloi's panties twisted. Have you ever posted about the Zio-occupied government? Do you assume that it is the case that it is ZOG? Do you believe that ZOG spews propaganda? Then why the fuck would you believe all the crap such as "Obama wants to impose Sharia" or "Obama is anti-Israel"? You can't have it both fucking ways. Open your eye and mind for Christ's sake. That was a fgure of speech btw, not an endorsement of any particular religion.
http://www.snopes.com/politics/medical/exemptions.asp
Snopes might occassionally have an agenda or at least appears to but:
"For members of religious groups to qualify for this exemption, they would have to be adherents of a religion or sect "described in section 1402(g)(1)" of the Internal Revenue Code, which governs exemptions from the payment of Social Security and Medicare taxes on self-employment income. In general, persons seeking a health insurance exemption must belong to a religion (or sect thereof) which has been in existence since 1951 and has an established history of spurning participation in insurance programs"
"How these provisions might be applied is currently a matter of speculation, not fact. Groups such as the Anabaptists (i.e., Amish, Mennonites, Hutterites) would likely qualify for an exemption from the health insurance requirement, as they have an established history of declining Social Security benefits and making their own provisions for dependent members"
"Whether Muslims would qualify for an exemption from the health insurance requirements is more difficult to define, as Islam is a much larger religion with practices that vary according to sect and region. Although Islam does have a tradition of barring conventional insurance products because they "involve an element of uncertainty, gambling and the charging of interest, which are prohibited by the Koran," some Muslim groups make exceptions for insurance which is required by law (such as automobile insurance), and some Muslim groups do not have objections to medical insurance. Most likely, though, Muslims would not qualify for an exemption from U.S. health insurance requirements because U.S. Muslims do not have a tradition of spurning Social Security (which is viewed more as a form of caring for those who are unable to meet their own needs than as something which involves elements of uncertainty, gambling, and interest payments), and no Muslim group has ever qualified for an exemption under the guidelines which define which religious groups would be exempt from the health care law."
Now, you were saying...?
Ignorance is power! Remember that! Brought to you by Glenn Beck (he of "the attractive lie which I want to believe is true because I like some of the other things he says".)
"Specifically" is utter bullshit. Before up arrowing what you WANT to believe, it might behoove you to know the facts first. Alternatively embrace the ignorance; it's part of the plan that you purport to reject. Ironic, huh?
OH-MEIN-GOTT!!!
Drunk white college boys, easy women and gays......clearly important demographics here.
I suggest a new strategy, R2: let the Wookie win.
I hope Aids will claim its next deserving victim quickly
I can't get those minutes back.
Bros and easy women combined.
In my days I would not allow this sort of thing on the Enterprise, the Federation be damned!
Well, in MY day, laddie, I'd take that green woman from Orion, and stomp that big-headed Talosian keeper around the room, d'ya ken?
'...so they can see how this specimen reacts; is THAT it?'
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6F5pAFhByU8
OR, you could have Richard Simmons (SARC!)...