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Thursday Humor? The Real Reason Venezuela Matters
With toilet paper shortages, record high stock prices, a lack of staple food supply, and a black market currency hyperinflating its way into solving the toilet paper shortage; many continue to wonder why they should care about a Latin American country's collapse into socialist revolution. The answer, simply put, lies in the following map...
Countries shaded by number of Miss World winners...
(h/t @Amazing_Maps )
A Venezuelan has been the winner of Miss World more times that any other nation... do you really want that to go away?
The Miss Venezuela contestants show that even with no toilet paper, one can still clean up nicely...
Now be a patriot and start buying Bolivars at the government rates...
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now there's an export you can build an economy around.
The one percenters don't require toilet paper for rectal clean-up anyway... they just call over their congressmen and senators...
I'll second the Tylers on this one.
The Venezuelan girls I've met in the Caribbean are usually gorgeous and muy amable.
I confirm many sightings of beautiful women in Venezuela. And they take that stuff very seriously down there (like Mississippi does re Miss America) re Miss World.
Socialism is create very beautiful girl by limit of caloric intake.
Just grab that ass and they are ready to go.
I wanna fry my maduro in your hot oil, amorcita. And, yes I would like the blinds dusted when you finish the windows.
I see Canada got the same number of winners as Antarctica. I guess that proves Canada isn't even a real country.
Canada is the hyphen in Anglo-American.
Stack On
You have not been twerked until a Latina fries your frijoles. These gringas are amateurs.
I can build a lot in that! :P
Capitalism is to create obesse women by tricking them into consuming excess calories
Now.....
Everyone needs a fat girl.
Heat in the winter,
Shade in the summer.
The Great Socialist Republic of Hollywood ;)
Indeed.
Russia has the same thing going on too...
Very beautiful.
(until they open their mouths and talk...)
Yep that 93 IQ thing gets boring after a few rounds.
Rounds of drinks?
that can be beaten out of them
That's an economy you can get your teeth into.
Socialism provide nice Brazilian wax under swimsuit.
Any chance the failure of Venezuela could send a few million of those beautiful gals slipping under the border fence?
Of course a bare handful of people might be interested in more mundane things like bearings sales in Peru. Probably not many, but some...
"2013 Ameru Results"
http://tinyurl.com/m7tg7gb
It takes a lot of balls to publish a number like that.
Agreed. There are many balls in each bearing, so dcrb is in excellent position to share - thank you !
Boris is confuse by photograph of female scholarship applicant and current condition of absence of toilet paper in Venezuela... Is applicant not use toilet paper for configuration of sparse bathing attire? But why is toilet paper black and how is to swim in water soluble garment...?
I'll go ahead and take one for the team...
I will volunteer to clean the shit off those girls in the photo should it be needed.
Hey, sometimes you gotta get dirteeee.......
Astonishing exotic beauties might arise of this mixed people
if they are very young. In neighboring Columbia Nicolas Gomez Davila stated while having the miscreants of this his continent and new world in mind : "God made the white and the black people. Not the mixed ones." Call me racist and have me banned, but if anything bans Latin America from ever catching up it will be Catholic belief systems in an eternal loser state of mind and screwed up genes as in mixed races.
I don't think you are a racist, but I do think your comment was one of the least intelligent things I have read in quite some time.
you're very forgiving...i'd be more inclined to call him an asshat
there's a school of thought in LatAm that supports part of the asshat's argument. basically there's caste system in LatAm that inculcates the inferiority of mixed race and dark people in their minds. it gets spread through the media, religious, and education system, filling their little heads with drivel about what is and should be. it's one of the reasons interbreeding (most commonly european blooded male-indigineous female) has been frowned upon for centuries. but stopping guys from having sex with pretty girls of any race is like stopping a tsunami, not gonna happen.
the part that makes no sense is his genetics argument. selectivity in genetic traits is one of the hot reasearch topics in biotech. if you can mix the better traits of separate races, net of anomalys/mutations, you can create some amazing creatures... like those venezuelans beauties.
most confusing about his argument is this: who is the wealthiest (reported) human on earth? last i checked it was Mr. Slim, from Latin America.
"Carlos" is Lebanese
Wait! What?!? /s
you seem to be confusing genetics with culture(statehood?). being of lebanese descent doesn't negate the 100+ years his family spent in LatAm. by that logic, the only real 'americans' or 'brazilians' or 'canadians' are natives, not those german/english/portuguese/african bastards running around the americas today. note that there isn't one american (latin or otherwise) of prominence who didn't have a father/grandfather/great-grandfather from the old world.
Why ban the idiots.....they are fun to watch....
Do you confuse catholic with marxist?
I do love that brown beaver....
"Get in there and get the blood diamond! Where amnesty intl now?!" http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=5d3_1369017322
ZeroHead; YOU HIT ONE OUT OF THE PARK with that statement! I salute you!
Ben and Janet insist the solution to Venezuela's woes are to print a lot more money very quickly and give it to the wealthy...
Now what do you suppose Van Morrison meant when he sang about his "Brown-Eyed Girl". Venezuelan?
Heck ya, I'll sponsor a few to live in my house.
anybody understood what that map is about? I have 2 university degrees and I didnt
number of times someone from a particular country has won Miss World.
I was puzzled for a second as well.
oh... I thought its the thickness of toilet paper leaves used
India won five times.
That was back when hairy beavers were all the rage.
I love me some 70's porn bush.
Been awhile since I seen a Sascrotch!
and to think Niger hasnt one err won once....
...just biased judges, or perhaps hotness inequality; another job for big gummint....
Map? What map? :)
Here comes the Miss Wookie Protection Act.
It's all politics.
I'll be looking to Latin America or East when I decide to "settle down".... I'm not impressed with US / UK Women anymore.
What happened to the females of today in the "Western World" - did American Idol / X-factor and "reality" (zombie) TV have that much of an effect?
Anyway, back to the topic at hand... Yeah, poor Venezuela.
I have been separated coming on three years, and i have had awful experiences with typical north american gals, but those Chinese girls are soft and cuddly and don't have attitude. Cuba has some of the most beautiful people i have ever seen and they are friendly, the food does suck however
the qualities about girls from non-developed world countries you're looking for is their disinclination to be antagonists or feminists. they've been told their place, accept it, and don't get all uppity when a guy reminds them. it's by far the most distinguishing characteristic, whether asian, latin american, african or eastern european. speaking generically, of course. there will always be a few rabblerousers, but even Ms. Kirchner knows she would be nothing without her husband's fame.
Nice beaver: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhyCL-ELRxg
Basket Weaving and Medieval Studies? It shows Miss World winners by country.
dance academy and a school of visual arts
I was sure you had two degrees in economics from Kruggers University...
Uh.. The number of winners per country for said contest. Long live higher ed.
Number of Miss World wins at a guess.
its a philisophical quandary. like... to find the answer, one must look deep within.
Normally, when someone puts description above the diagram/map you try to connect that information with graphical representation
seriously? you just mindfreaked me bra! youre like that guy from a beautiful mind
I had to zoom in on the camel toe to figure it out.
I love good toe.
You do mean llama toe, si?
The map is confusing at first because you're trying to force your brain to process the information while at the same time it's trying to figure out "where the hell is the larger version of picture I clicked on to see?" After you scroll down a bit and see that the picture is there, you're brain calms down and when you scroll back up (eventually) the map makes perfect sense. This is how it worked for me at least.
thanks bro.. I understand myself better now
@ulterior: "Countries shaded by number of Miss World winners"
just goes to show.
it was EDITED after I commented ;)
I'd be asking for your money back.
The map is not the bikini....atoll.
Why don't you learn to read first.
"Countries shaded by number of Miss World winners..."
More humour
msoft 10c beat up $1.3. Netflix 13c beat up $55
life's the titts when you can suckem!
I know correlation is not causation... but does this mean the rupi and pound are fucked next?
Completey under appreciated humor in the comment above.
Those youths deserve some fruits of the rebound.
I gotta rebounding fruit they can have.
CAMEL TOE ALERT!
Do they go backstage and compare deliniation/height-of-mound/depth-of-cleft? Like dudes in the gym locker room comparing dongle size? Not that I've ever done that. And not that there's anything wrong with that. Who am I to judge.
I'd let one of them broads shit on me.... Oh, sorry... Wrong forum!
Are your initials Dominique Strauss-Kahn?
Two things that will always have tangible value - Pussy and Gold (the latter, however, having a shelf life).
Gold FleshLights
The latter has been losing it's buying power too. Go to West Virginia and you can pick some up for what it costs to buy a case of soda.
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2014-01-18/vast-stretches-impoverished-app...
Pussy and Gold...FORMER and LATTER.
The FORMER has the shelf life. The LATTER, Gold, has been around, is around, and will be around long after the pussy has died.
I am not a Grammar Cop but I am a Definition Cop. No foul intended ebworthen and I did not Down Arrow you.
Just don't let it happen again (HI: Humor Intended)
I don't normally like socialists, but when I do they look like that.
Stay thirsty my friends.
Well, they do love to spend other peoples money.
Just don't run out of it ;-)
Now there's a cause I could get behind (cough, cough).
Behind, above, below, sandwiched, etc. etc. etc.
I can attest to that- had liberty there in mid 80's. Hotel where we stayed was hosting a pageant...and it was a good couple of days to be in the area- I'll say that.
Too bad its a shithole now- pun intended.
A difference between lovers of liberty and libertines is that the latter think it is a point of pride to act like a dog.
What's wrong with acting like a dog? they take a lot of naps and they bite people when they're pissed off; makes sense to me.
Life of a dog indeed,
Both Hillary Clinton and Yellen have reported that male dogs can have sex up to five times a day,... sounds to me like I want to be a dog at the FED or whitehouse in my next life.
You'd want to hit Hillary or Old Yellen? The line starts with you.
Isn't it about time the revolution goes full circle in Venezuala and someone steps up to the plate with an AK47 and gets rid of Hugo jr? How much more of this insanity is this country willing to endure? Just sayin.
Great example of how overrated colledge degrees are!
- couldn't resist, con permisso.
I wonder how they rank on meat consumption per capita?
Glad you added "per capita"
Otherwise, this was going to go into the gutter really quick.
(yeah, I'm going to hell. On the Express Train.)
Sorry centerline, God don't want you and hell's afraid you'll take over. Looks like we're both gonna have to do this life thingy at least once more.
England, really ? England has won that shit five times? NO WAY! Now THAT is a conspiracy theory if I ever saw one.
My thoughts exactly.
The ONLY thing older British men think of is retiring as an expat to Phuket with some of Faber's Babes.
Do What Thou Wilt Shall Be The Whole Of The Law
http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/False%20Religions/Wicca%20&%20Witchcraft/...
Of course nobody notices the North Korean spy in the background camouflaged as a gay sailor with hot red pants. Kim Jong Un will deliver toilet paper to Venezuela in exchange for beauty queen.
Cue gratuitous boob vid: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuIJXTzVKss (you can just mute it and enjoy the scenery)
content creator's original in HD:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hP8nnCqK4gE
(at least, it looks like the correct channel)
The cost of a big Mac in Venezuela would cost either USD $2.00, $14.00 or
$25.00 depending on the exchange rate!
What does a Miss cost in Venezuela?
Those young ladies don't need any toilet paper because you'd eat a mile of their "s%*t" to get a whiff of their asses!...
Squeeky clean written over each one of those bathing suit backsides!!!!
I live in Venezuela, Yes there is a lot of beautifull woman, but think that bourdeos in france are more beautifull. ¿Why? They are more natural !.
Now we have toliet paper, but is missing the corn and wheat flour and sugar, that is very bad, a lot of people are saying bad word to goverment in the supermarket. What will happend? Nobody know. The problem is not how bad is the goverment, the problem is that the oposition is worse. The oposition just want a check in blank to save the country, dont have a clean path to resolve the problems, them very few believe in they. A lot of people believe that the oposition just want to take the goverment to stealth the petro dollars. God save us !
And who is providing the credit to the businesses to bring in that "toilet paper"?
Should we take a guess?!!!
What people should find astounding is how rich in resources your Country is and that you would be handicapped in such a way by the U.S. banks is unforgiveable.
Yes, the u.s. banking cartel are doing a great dirty job with the credit rating of venezuela, that never miss a international payment.
But the main problem are we, the venezuelan people, that with a lot of resources: Petroleum, Gold, Uranium, Threes, Water, better climate, we don`t want to work, myself included. The venezuelan dream is be the president of the country, to control and steal the petro dollars and buy a real state in Miami and Europe, to live the last days with our girl model of the year. When we change in our minds we will have everything!, but now we have what we deserve !
Is there a country anywhere on Earth where the ideal is to only have what we earn? To never use force on others and never allow it to be used on us?
I think there is a country like that, but it's still in the future.
Let us go there as fast as we can, even if there are nightmares in the way.
While what you write about may be a Utopian Dream it will never happen. The flaw in Volunteerism is that you cannot force others to adopt it.
There will always be some, actually most, that will choose enslavement over freedom. They will not volunteer to leave your voluntary society.
So will you force them out? Will you use passive aggression and ostracize them, starve them, so that they "choose" to leave?
Are they free to choose enslavement and security (even false) over that of freedom and risk?
I am not supporting statism. No. But I am supporting realism.
Get your head out of the clouds and stop dreaming for that which can never manifest due to the folly of the many. Humans are imperfect. Because of their imperfection they will choose what seems to be the easiest path while heading toward self destruction.
THERE ARE NO POLITICAL SOILUTIONS..
"The venezuelan dream is be the president of the country, to control and steal the petro dollars and buy a real state in Miami and Europe, to live the last days with our girl model of the year. When we change in our minds we will have everything!, but now we have what we deserve !"...
Oh my...
Not possible that a Venezuelan could be so filled with delusions of grandeur to think like white trash "Americana"!
That's our occupation you're messing with!!!
ROSE PETALS!!!!!!!!
Have they considered using a sponge on the end of a stick?
I don't get your image aligory. Do you mean a sponge on a stice as in the crucifiction, or are you aluding to some form of distant washing of diseased women? How do either images apply?
How does one wipe one's own ass without Toilet Paper?
There is nothing deep or allegorical about his statement as it is just a matter of practicality.
"Stick with a sponge"??? LMAO.
You, Sir, apparently never heard of the Middle East. The Arabs never devised toilet paper, so they just use their left hand and, maybe, a bottle of water. You can tell where Arabs have been crapping by the profusion of empty water bottles around on the ground OR the pools of water spilled all over an indoor toilet stall, empty water bottles, and the bizarre mess created when someone squats over the toilet facing the wrong direction, craps on the seat, dumps water all over everything, and manages to NOT use the TP. Horrifying. Makes you want to hold it in all day until you return to your safe bathroom.
BTW-I once met a provincial reconstruction guy from the US Govt who was part of a move to update the Iraqi cops. He told me they would take a building, gut it, renovate it, bring it up to US standards, and hand it over to the Iraqis. 2 weeks after handing one of these new buildings to the Iraqis, he went back to make sure they had done a good job. He went up to the bathroom on the 2nd floor and was horrified to discover they had destroyed the plumbing. Once the toilets didn't work, they proceeeded to shit on every square inch of the bathroom floor until it was fully covered, then they found a room down the hall and decided to turn that into the new bathroom and started shitting there. Truly one of the world's great cultures...
Yes, The Koran says to use your left hand or have a slave girl use her hands to clean your backside. I was at the Houston international airport and saw an arab washing his feet in a public water fountain used for drinking.
I feel sorry for Barbara Eden.
If Socialists like to spend other peoples money and tell you lies to get ohter people money, then beautiful women are socialists. Next, divorce attorneys are revolutions when the other peoples money runs out. On th otherhand Obama is not that pretty.
Something tells me these girls have the toilet paper.
Yeah but at least they get paid with something.
They all look the same.
Trust me...they are.
That's because their tits are real.
The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant compared to the power of the hairy clam.
Just ask Sir Paul.
The Venezuelans nationalized their oil and gas industry and DID NOT get invaded by Tio Sam.That's gotta be a first.And Hugo got their gold back.Clever fella.Nil Mortuit and all that.
Square jaws, adams apples and broad shoulders? Thanks but no thanks.
Um... guys?
What that map shouts out to me is ... I'm going to Iceland.
God kveld. Kan jeg kjøpe deg en drink?I can vouch for that frozen rock in the north Atlantic. Spent 3 months there in 1996. Never in my life have I seen so many ridiculously beautiful women concentrated in one tiny place (Reykjavik). Had to be careful though....they start hitting the club/bar scene at very young ages (14-16), and there were even night spots frequented by those of the cougar flavor. So much eye candy my head hurt from trying to take it all in.....
Wanchai, if anyone wants to know where to get some.
You bastard, WB7. I think I got the clap just from googling that!
when are we going to start seeing ads on ZH for Venezuelan mail order brides? i might sign up for that.
Mmmm. South American Snizz
Living in Colombia...all is good..
no doubt about it, there is something other-worldly in the aesthetics down there-abouts. something like a pleasure dome lofting, lilting and lidding over most areas of columbia and venezuela; las mujeras estan bonita...muy, muy bonita! mi encanta!
they're basically sweet, too. it's the oddest and most unfamiliar sensation an american can possibly imagine...they actually want to please their men. strange...evah-so strange...fine-ass american pussy is almost never sweet; and if'n any in the american relationship are to be pleased, you it ain't, my brothers.
my humble ambition is to impregnate the entire nation, and its western neighbor...gentrification on the grandest fathomable scale.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdOLrBMIWz8
oh how i pray ceaselessly for a revisit down del sur.
okay, quick version: there was venezuela, there was a hasienda, there was an angelically beautiful latina...there was therefore el magnifico, janus.
but, that, gentlemen, is a sealed book...i'm a married man; and i was likewise at the time. but i love her still; though i'm sure she's by now raising her own beautiful brood, sired by a man who couldn't possibly appreciate her, i nevertheless miss her...with searing and abiding pain, loss and vacuous longing.
sigh.
bigger sigh.
exahustive sigh.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMwF_l2_4es
the motion of her tiny hands/
and the quiver of the bones below/
are the signs of a girl that loves/
who'll tell ya everything ya need to know/
...truth doesn't make a noise,
janus
no doubt about it, there is something other-worldly in the aesthetics down there-abouts. something like a pleasure dome lofting, lilting and lidding over most areas of columbia and venezuela; las mujeras estan bonita...muy, muy bonita! mi encanta!
they're basically sweet, too. it's the oddest and most unfamiliar sensation an american can possibly imagine...they actually want to please their men. strange...evah-so strange...fine-ass american pussy is almost never sweet; and if'n any in the american relationship are to be pleased, you it ain't, my brothers.
my humble ambition is to impregnate the entire nation, and its western neighbor...gentrification on the grandest fathomable scale.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdOLrBMIWz8
oh how i pray ceaselessly for a revisit down del sur.
okay, quick version: there was venezuela, there was a hasienda, there was an angelically beautiful latina...there was therefore el magnifico, janus.
but, that, gentlemen, is a sealed book...i'm a married man; and i was likewise at the time. but i love her still; though i'm sure she's by now raising her own beautiful brood, sired by a man who couldn't possibly appreciate her, i nevertheless miss her...with searing and abiding pain, loss and vacuous longing.
sigh.
bigger sigh.
exahustive sigh.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMwF_l2_4es
the motion of her tiny hands/
and the quiver of the bones below/
are the signs of a girl that loves/
who'll tell ya everything ya need to know/
...truth doesn't make a noise,
janus
Whoa, whoa stop stop stop! What the hell is this, the United Kingdom has sent five Ms. World winners? How can that be? This is the European country with the worst oral care and they have five attractive women? W.T.F.?
Immigration Policy???
I remember when Venez was famous for shortstops...
Lots of pretty Latinas but short shelf life, most are past their prime by the time they're legal. The girls in this pic aren't really Latinas they're euros who know spanish
communism is doing to venzuelans what the banksters are doing to the "free" world...