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The 'Economic' State Of The Union

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Submitted by Lance Roberts of STA Wealth Management,

 

 

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Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:07 | 4375890 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

Mr. Obama also will remind lawmakers that he intends to issue more executive orders in this 'year of action' after criticizing the 2013 Congress as one of the most unproductive in history.

The fact that Barack Obama, an ethnic minority in America, is supporting the end of the filibuster in the US Senate is a very telling sign-post on what appears to be the road to, "A tyranny of the majority."

 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:11 | 4375893 Ratscam
Ratscam's picture

"The President will do his best to put a positive spin on the current economic environment and ..."
Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen. Jean Connery as John Mason in The Rock

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:13 | 4375908 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

My fellow Americans blah blah blah blah blah blah ME blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah ME blah blah blah blah ME blah blah blah blah GOVERNMENT MUST blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah  blah blah EVIL TEA PARTY blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah LET ME BE CLEAR blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah EVIL REPUBLICANS blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah TAXES ARE TOO LOW blah blah blah blah blah blah blah I SUPPORT ISRAEL blah blah blah blah INCOME INEQUALITY blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah NEW IDEAS blah blah blah blah blah blah blah EVIL RICH blah blah blah blah OBAMACARE IS WORKING blah blah blah blah blah blah I blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah ME blah blah ME blah blah blah blah blah blah (LONG PAUSE) blah  blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah OBAMACARE IS WORKING blah blah blah THANKS TO MY STEWARDSHIP OVER A RECOVERED ECONOMY blah blah blah blah blah blah  GOVERNMENT CAN blah blah blah blah blah blah blah YOU NEED ME blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah I WILL DO WHAT I WANT IN-SPITE OF CONGRESSblah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah CARING blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah CHANGE blah blah blah blah blah blah blah TOMORROW WILL BE GREAT blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah (REPEAT 259 TIMES)”

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:16 | 4375927 Grande Tetons
Grande Tetons's picture

Toss in folks, threats, Iran and children. 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:20 | 4375932 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

I am afraid the Calvin Candie (Harry Reid) and Stephen (POTUS) visual reference (above) might be too subtle, especially for those that have not seen Mr. Tarantino's film.

Calvin Candie gets his wealth from forcing male slaves to fight to the death in Mandingo fights and running a brothel in Greenville in his Cleopatra Club, making him a pimp/slavemaster.

 

 

His best friend is Stephen, an Uncle Tom who caters to his master's every need to the detriment of his fellow slaves...

...and thus we have the odd age-old case of a minority telling us that Majority Rule is good for us...

 

Mr. Obama also will remind lawmakers that he intends to issue more executive orders in this 'year of action'

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:22 | 4375960 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

Yeah, maybe "I haven't driven a car in 18 years" is a euphemism.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:38 | 4376067 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Hitlery was misquoted.  They meant to say SHE hasn't been driven in 18 years.  She's a serial scissorer!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=scissoring

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 15:04 | 4376252 negative rates
negative rates's picture

The wreconomic state of the union address, we wait with bated breath.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 15:19 | 4376333 BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

I also heard* that half way through Obama's speech their will be a short ceremony to marry '33' couples of various backgrounds and sexual orientation, and it will be officiated by Dennis Rodman...

.

http://music-mix.ew.com/2014/01/26/grammys-macklemore-ryan-lewis-perform...33-marriages-madonna/

 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:45 | 4376120 atomp
atomp's picture

Thank you HH, haven't seen it. Sounds entertaining.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:16 | 4375930 kralizec
kralizec's picture

This punk has only three elements to his game: 1) race card 2) blame card 3) lie ass off card.

He'll cycle through all these dozens of times over, as usual.

Fuck him and all like him!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:26 | 4375978 Handful of Dust
Handful of Dust's picture

i hope his exec order includes:

1. $3,000 bucks for my 'Thingamajig' which he promised me a couple of years ago;

2. slash all WS bonuses to no more then $100 million/quarter;

3. bring all our troops home finally, instead of moving them from desert to desert like the wandering tribes of Abraham;

4. a free Hummer in every driveway; and,

5. a minimum savings rate yield of a generous 0.02% instead of the devastatingly meager 0.01% we get now.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:38 | 4376058 funthea
funthea's picture

ohhhhh... You said, "Fuck him and all like him!" That is obviously a reference to all half black people everywhere. Therefore, true to form of the liberal stratosphere, you need to be called a racist, and all of your points, regardless of validity, need to be stricken from the collective consciousness of society.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:44 | 4376109 kralizec
kralizec's picture

The "liberal stratosphere" = "all like him"!  :)

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 15:10 | 4376283 XitSam
XitSam's picture

4) spend other people's money card

but you may have assumed that since Obama is a politician

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:40 | 4376081 Gief Gold Plox
Gief Gold Plox's picture

You didn't write that!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:22 | 4375966 max2205
max2205's picture

Yet for 200 years we are at all time highs......I guess Anzn will post $8 per share earnings this week to confirm it all

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:09 | 4375896 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Big Brother/Sister says to corporations, "start hiring or receive a visit from an IRS agent".  How's that for stimulus?http://theulstermanreport.com/2014/01/28/valerie-jarrett-orders-companie...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:16 | 4375935 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Wahahahhaha USA USA USA! Bin Laden/Snowden is dead!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:24 | 4375977 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

Was Snowden also buried at sea?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:42 | 4376097 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Don't worry, they will generate footage by throwing a prop from that Boris Karloff movie into the gulf of mexico by some on-leave coast guard sea rats.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:23 | 4375964 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

ROTFLLOLOLTOLROLROLTOFLTLFOTLFOLT

Surely these are the actions of someone confident in his work and signs we are in a recovering economy.

 

Mr. Obama will emphasize his intention to use unilateral presidential authority—bypassing Congress when necessary—to an extent not seen in his previous State of the Union speeches, White House officials said.

He also is expected to announce that some of the nation's largest employers, including Xerox Corp. XRX +2.17% , AT&T Inc., T +0.64% Lockheed Martin Corp. LMT +0.81% and Procter & Gamble Co. PG +1.12% , have signed a White House pledge agreeing not to discriminate against the long-term unemployed when making hiring decisions, according to a draft of the policy and interviews with several people familiar with the matter.

 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:13 | 4375898 Xandrino
Xandrino's picture

Stats and numbers dont mean shit anymore. They're cooked up or don't mean shit.

It's the 140 nations where the US has MILITARY PRESENCE, that's the real issue.

Gung Ho economics. Buy our shit or be bombed to hell!

 

It's the 90-95% of the population that has to wake up, nothing will change otherwise...and history shows that NEVER happens...it's just a changing of the gatekeepers. This has been going on for 2000 years and it will not change.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:12 | 4375905 TuesdayBen
TuesdayBen's picture

Will this loser discuss how many he has driven into poverty?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:14 | 4375923 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Walmart, Walmart that's our store,

We shop there cuz we are poor.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:17 | 4375940 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

Raise the minimum wage. Problem solved.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:17 | 4375942 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

He is waiting for the auditorium to fill up with that target audience first.  No point starting now.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:14 | 4375915 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

http://blogs.marketwatch.com/encore/2014/01/28/report-obama-to-propose-n...

Read this without laughing.

 

"launch a plan that would allow workers whose employers don’t offer retirement

plans to invest money for retirement, tax deferred,

in Treasury bonds; the employees could eventually convert those savings to"

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:26 | 4375943 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Yeah, eventually convert those savings to IRA's, which will be taxed into oblivion or converted to Treasury madated and defined annuities.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:16 | 4375928 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Welcome to the New Rome.

All flail Caesar.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:21 | 4375957 fonzannoon
Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:24 | 4375976 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

True.  Only difference I can see is it would force people to buy Treasuries for a defined period.  .Gov needs a buyer for what the Chinese will be selling?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:26 | 4375981 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Next Yellen will start printing toilet paper at the Marriner Eccles building so China can trade in our Bonds for SOMETHING.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 15:05 | 4376266 negative rates
negative rates's picture

You mean them illegie ones? Good luck backing those with full faith and credit.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:32 | 4376030 Grande Tetons
Grande Tetons's picture

Some financial institution, or several, will need to administer the program and collect fees.  So, nothing will change...the investor...will still be fucked and charged for the pleasure. 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:52 | 4376169 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

seriously, what's better for wiping your ass? toilet paper or a rich-n-fibre sand paper bond,...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:34 | 4376042 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

Don't worry, they're only going to be buying 'WeAlTh CoUpOnS' anyways...

http://www.newyorkfed.org/markets/tot_operation_schedule.html

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:20 | 4375954 Rising Sun
Rising Sun's picture

Barry is a pawn.

 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:24 | 4375968 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

Obama is growing old as gracefully as Madonna.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:32 | 4376023 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

Mongo just pawn in game of life

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:21 | 4375963 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

"Obama's policies"?  as in plural?  it seems hes had 1 policy since 2009.  do nothing, let ben print.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:27 | 4375980 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

Obama should executive order a new commemorative DVD box set of Pete Seeger, and give the proceeds to Vietnam refugees in Houston.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:28 | 4375995 q99x2
q99x2's picture

I give him the highest impeachment rating of any US President.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:28 | 4375997 free_lunch
free_lunch's picture

TPP & TTIP will make us all rich.....right?

"Another back-room secret corporate deal. The TPP has been shrouded in secrecy and backers now want to rush it through Congress." TPP:   http://www.cwa-union.org/issues/entry/c/trans-pacific_free_trade_agreement

TTIP: http://rt.com/business/eu-us-trade-brussels-528/

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:36 | 4376055 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

NAFTA has brought us untold amounts of wealth and disease

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:32 | 4376009 Comte d'herblay
Comte d'herblay's picture

Since I first became cognizant of this annual non-event, (I was passing by the TV screen one year when it was on at my dad's house and wondered why all these human beans were clapping after each sentence the speaker uttered), I have never seen, heard, or absorbed thru osmosis a single syllable of these inane, narcissistic, oratorical selfies.

In celebration tonight at having purposefully missed this Annual vomitous of words that signify nothing, I will crack open a pack of Keebler Chocolate Chip cookies, go down into the basement and sight in my new .22 semiautomatic LR, using silent bullets, with targets will have pictures of hilary clinton, theBamster, McConnell, Pelosi, Ruth Ginsberg, Joe Cassano, Lord Blankfein, Steve Schwarzman, Alan Greenspan, Tim Geithner, Neel KAshkari, Ben Bernanke, Jack Lew, Janet Yellen, Robby Rubin, Jamie ( i mean really, "Jamie" for a grown up??), Chelsea, bill, sid blumenthal, Joe Conason, Gloria Allred, Bill O'Reilly, sean Hannity and most of the RINO  house members, and RINO senators.

 The catharsis of using the images of these 4th rate human beans as targets is exhilarating.  And a much better use of my time than sitting there enthralled at the bold faced lies, the omissions, the spin, and bullshit that passes for POTUS politics. 


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:30 | 4376010 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

declare victory on the economy and move on. if you tune in for that you really have too much time on your hands

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:31 | 4376013 QE49er
QE49er's picture

80% Job Approval in DC...time to invade & overthrow

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:31 | 4376022 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

The answer to the question:"Are we better off today than we were when the current Administration took control?",

has been the same, "NO", my entire life.

However, the illusion of prosperity has been maintained better in preceeding years.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:35 | 4376043 muleskinner
muleskinner's picture

Good evening, Americans and members of Congress.

I have only two more words to speak this evening.

I resign.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:38 | 4376066 tommylicious
tommylicious's picture

It's time for Tax Cuts.  Central Bank can't do all the heavy lifting whilst pols act like toddlers throwing tantrums.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:46 | 4376070 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

... and the world will look on in awe, at america's thriving potemkin village's-- flowing prosperously from land to sea, and mountain to valley... as the hungry`podium prepares the machiavellian master with a sanitised rhetorical 'paralogism fodder', of fibre-free absolute statism-- as thy beggard'd neighbors watch with star-struck rancor...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:38 | 4376073 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

You can't address the eCONomy without a CON man.  Enter Obama!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 15:38 | 4376111 syntaxterror
syntaxterror's picture

"Shit. I know shit's bad right now, with all that starving bullshit, and the dust storms. And we are running out of french fries and burrito coverings. But I got a solution. 

Now I understand everyones' shit's emotional right now. But I've got a 3 point plan that's going to fix EVERYTHING. Number 1: We've got this guy, ‘Not Sure’. Number 2: He's got a higher IQ than ANY MAN ALIVE. And Number 3: He's going to fix EVERYTHING."

 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:47 | 4376135 replaceme
replaceme's picture

...Treasury has been resorting to "extraordinary measures" to "pay bills.  

Is that ZH for QE, something else?  Any numbers?  I freely admit I'm not up to speed on where our money goes.

 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 14:49 | 4376146 goldmemento
goldmemento's picture

Can you guys please help me with my math?

If the US wanted to return to a Gold Standard, it would need to reset the price of gold to cover it's debt, correct?

$17,000,000,000,000 debt

8,000,000 kg of gold in reserve (alleged)

= $2,125,000 dollars per Kg

= $67,000 per troy ounce

This can't be right. What have I done wrong?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 15:05 | 4376255 Billy Sol Estes
Billy Sol Estes's picture

If you confiscate all the gold then lie about how much is behind the curtain then it really is $5/oz

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 02:32 | 4378787 X_mloclaM
X_mloclaM's picture

4t/261511132 = $15,295.72

covers mon base, keeps FR sys, debt still fails in many cases, it is the MIX of assets(debt) quality that's improved instantaneously (so, less of a variance between liabilities ($) and good-assets (paying debt, gold, your mom)), as future fundamental picture improvement also adds immediate sentiment price bump

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 15:51 | 4376479 Save_America1st
Save_America1st's picture

Alex Jones had Bob Barr on last Thursday.  He was a Congressman for 8 years back in the Clinton era.  He was the one who brought up the charges of impeachment against Clinton and got enough co-signers to make it happen. 

Bob Barr is a legal bad ass, ex-CIA, and a statesman along the lines of Ron Paul.  Look him up.

Here's the kicker:  Bob Barr is running for Congress again this year in Georgia and it sounds like he's easily going to win it.  And when he does win, he will be one of the baddest mother fuckers in Congress, and he's going to go after obama immediately with the same charges of impeachment that he used against Clinton. 

Here's the interview on Alex Jones...you all gotta listen to it:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24clEFBWqUg

Barr said he pulled out the impeachment paperwork he used against Clinton and dusted it off...then he updated what needed updating and crafted it for impeaching obama...he said it was easy given all the evidence against obama and his usurpation of the Constitution. 

And since he already served 8 years in Congress previously, he gets all his seniority back...that means he can't be marginalized as some rookie freshman Congressman.  He's a legal wizard and knows how to work Congress inside and out.

He's going to be obama's biggest nightmare and will quickly build a coalition against obama and the rest of the treasonous scum in Congress.  I think we're going to see a lot more of the rats scurrying off the sinking ship once Barr gets back to town.

Here's his website...send him a few bucks, cuz we need this guy in D.C. big time to fight the fight up close and personal against obama and the rest of his scummy little miscreant crew.

http://barrcongress.com/

Pass the word around to everyone you email and let's help make sure Bob Barr gets back to D.C. so we can get this impeachment rolling!!!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:43 | 4376711 trichotil
trichotil's picture

all those asshats are "alternative" media kosher kontrolled opposition (what isnt eh zh?). sotu bingo and/or drinking game:

https://scontent-b-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/t1/1604529_706660232700...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 20:28 | 4377561 d edwards
d edwards's picture

State of the Union? More like state of delusion-0bozo's, that is.

 

BTW, what f-ing difference does it make to raise the min. wage if you can't find a f-ing job like the tens of MILLIONS who have given up looking for work, thus they are not longer counted as "unemployed?"

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 20:23 | 4377546 d edwards
d edwards's picture

I'm old enough to remember Barr in CONgress the first time-he's just another f-ing progressive in sheeps clothing. Forget about Barr-don't be a sucker.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 20:36 | 4377581 Mad Muppet
Mad Muppet's picture

All hail: the Communist in Chief!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 20:58 | 4377668 A. Buttle
A. Buttle's picture

The Bath House O'Barry is being fluffed as we speak.

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