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President Obama Delivers His View On The State Of The Union - Live Feed

Tyler Durden's picture


Given the fact that the S&P 500 is up over 18% since the last State of the Union address, we suspect the state of the Union will be "strong." However, a glimpse over the shoulder of Tom Perkins and his pals and one can't help but wonder how "strong" the Union is when there are 2.845 million more people not in the labor force than a year ago. [and for those who like excuses - this is higher than the working-age population growth of 2.4 million people - so we did "lose" jobs]

Last year's 6,990 words were strewn with "hope", "change", "jobs" and "wall street" - we suspect the term "inequality" pops up more than once this time along with the ubiquitous lambasting of the opposition for counterfactually buggering the whole "recovery" plan up. If only there was no 'opposition' - oh wait, we forgot to add "unilateral" and "executive order" as suggested words for tonight's show.


A chart to bear in mind when considering the state of the union...


A reminder from last year's SOTU...


And this year's


Adding that:


And there waqs much rejoicing in the Democrat lands...



The State of the Union tease...


The "enhanced" State of the Union - Live Feed


And the Republican's "Enhanced" fact-checking service... And Response to the President...

And here is how the market responded to last year's 'socialist' agenda...


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Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:57 | 4377888 QE49er
QE49er's picture

***Incoming Transmission:

I am interupting this speech from your dictator to give you an important message.  In 1913 your country was overrun by private banking cabal.  Since then you have slid down the road of endless tyranny, all the product of human governing imperfection.  A prophecy was told that a hero would rise from the ashes to avenge your sufferings, a robot warrior, that is I.

Prime Objective:  Eliminate all things that are destroying your country:

  • No more Facebook Narcissism
  • No more FED bankster manipulated markets
  • No more despicable all powerful federal government
  • No more Barf inducing tyrants ruling over you like Yellen, Kagan, Hillary Rotten Clinton, the local county judge, etc.
  • No more media reports of celebrity weight loss, drug use, and mug shots
  • No more toilet paper currency backed by nothing
  • No more Bankster Monkey Hammering of Precious Metals
  • No more raping of the constitution
  • No more Fat Fingers
  • No more can kicking politicians
  • No more 2 party mob rule
  • No more Washington Compost & Los Angeles Slimes spewing failed socialism
  • No more occupations that serve no lasting purpose to society like Marketers, Advertisers, Real Estate Agents, insurance salesman, shakedown lawyers…
  • No more insurance companies spamming the airways
  • No more endless wars
  • No more Police traffic ticket extortion
  • No more public school prison camps
  • No more Ponzi schemes like Social Security
  • No more Government Slobs leeching off the public with their exorbitant salaries & pensions
  • No more Kangaroo Courts, IRS, FEMA, FDA, EPA, CIA, FBI, NSA, TSA, DEA

This objective shall commence the next time I hear Marie Osmond or Dan Marino promoting their diarrhea food, Clowns promoting Obamacare, any Pfizer drug pushing commercial or that obsessively over-lipsticked hog Flo promoting overpriced insurance, whichever comes first. 

***This is the end of the transmission


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:01 | 4377919 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture





No Porn on the list!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:16 | 4377993 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture


Fuck everyone in that room



Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:21 | 4378016 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture










Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:26 | 4378046 asteroids
asteroids's picture

A room full of evil corrupt and immoral snakes. God help us all.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:28 | 4378064 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



psst, they're in the same place at one time


pass it on

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:37 | 4378118 john39
john39's picture

these clowns are the puppets.  until the puppet masters get exposed, nothing will change.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:42 | 4378146 SMG
SMG's picture

The congress people should all make that seal noise when they clap.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:47 | 4378171 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Hats off to QE49er for busting his stones to be top-kick-post on this thread.  He obviously did a lot of thinking, planning and hitting of the "refresh" button to get it done.  

I like you, kid.  You've got moxie.  Yes, I just used the word moxie.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:50 | 4378181 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

"The fact that we are here today to debate raising America’s debt limit is a sign of leadership failure. It is a sign that the U.S. Government can’t pay its own bills. It is a sign that we now depend on ongoing financial assistance from foreign countries to finance our Government’s reckless fiscal policies."
    "Over the past 5 years, our federal debt has increased by $3.5 trillion to $8.6 trillion.That is “trillion” with a “T.” That is money that we have borrowed from the Social Security trust fund, borrowed from China and Japan, borrowed from American taxpayers. And over the next 5 years, between now and 2011, the President’s budget will increase the debt by almost another $3.5 trillion."
    "Numbers that large are sometimes hard to understand. Some people may wonder why they matter. Here is why: This year, the Federal Government will spend $220 billion on interest. That is more money to pay interest on our national debt than we’ll spend on Medicaid and the State Children’s Health Insurance Program. That is more money to pay interest on our debt this year than we will spend on education, homeland security, transportation, and veterans benefits combined. It is more money in one year than we are likely to spend to rebuild the devastated gulf coast in a way that honors the best of America."

    "And the cost of our debt is one of the fastest growing expenses in the Federal budget. This rising debt is a hidden domestic enemy, robbing our cities and States of critical investments in infrastructure like bridges, ports, and levees; robbing our families and our children of critical investments in education and health care reform; robbing our seniors of the retirement and health security they have counted on."
    "Every dollar we pay in interest is a dollar that is not going to investment in America’s priorities."

Senator Barack Obama (D-IL)


March 16, 2006

Official National Debt at that time: 9 trillion USD

Official National Debt NOW: 18 trillion USD


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:53 | 4378455 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

The Obama Theme Song "America, Forward!"

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:11 | 4378234 QE49er
QE49er's picture

Bud Light presents:  Real Men of Genius.  Today we salute you Mr. ZeroHedge Refresh button clicker... 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:24 | 4378282 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

You earned it.  Well done.  Now get the fuck back to work.  Millions on government entitlement programs are depending on you.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:42 | 4378148 bunzbunzbunz
bunzbunzbunz's picture

Pffft. Bitcoin can change it. Get some free bitcoins at Then go spend them. You can change things for yourself fatty.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:43 | 4378151 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

To paraphrase Robin Williams, this is where I get so hammered I wake up nude on the hood of my car with my keys up my ass going "I swear I'll never drink that much again!"...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:55 | 4378188 economics9698
economics9698's picture

Oh fuck I did that in high school, woke up on a car hood with this fat chick next to me wondering if I had fucked her the night before.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:05 | 4378230 Blano
Blano's picture

If you can't remember, you probably did.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:04 | 4378225 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



Hey, NSA!


see the lean response?


Turn your gaze..

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:17 | 4378255 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture

Theres over 2000 shoes in that room..and they are all clapping for this shit?


Just another let down...sigh.


All these emotional stories to hide the true agenda.





Wed, 01/29/2014 - 02:34 | 4378789 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

God's sittin' this one out. Hang on to your ass...ets.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 08:33 | 4379147 kralizec
kralizec's picture


Once again, another morning comes and I wake up not finding the District of Crooks a smoldering ruin.

What a bummer.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:26 | 4378062 knukles
knukles's picture

Mrs.K:  Knukie, honey.  What are you doing?
K:        I'm on ZeroHedge
Mrs.K:  What are you reading?
K:        Nothing, just commenting on the SOTU
Mrs.K:  Oh, you're listening to it?
K:        Nah, just commenting.
Mrs.K:  Thank God!  You had me worried there.  Have you taken your meds tonight, honey?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:57 | 4378203 gafgroocK
gafgroocK's picture



That sounds like you and Mrs K are gonna have "Date" night when you quit counting recs??

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:14 | 4378252 sunaJ
sunaJ's picture

A hard woman is good to find.  Bless you, Mrs. K.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:35 | 4378117 Wahooo
Wahooo's picture

Rules please, RULES.  Or is it practice on ZH to just guzzle through the entire speech?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:25 | 4378052 The Heart
The Heart's picture



Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:37 | 4378123 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



you're the best

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:46 | 4378161 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

The breathalyzer device attached to my keyboard won't let my play that, dammit man!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:28 | 4378072 Gringo Viejo
Gringo Viejo's picture

That is one crazy, unamerican boy.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:17 | 4378257 EmmittFitzhume
EmmittFitzhume's picture

The state of the Onion! What a big JOKE!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:21 | 4378014 booboo
booboo's picture

Senseless drivel for mindless masses.

Hopey Changey, moar burrito coverings, blah, blah, blah, my administration, I, I am, Moochell and I, yeti, hairy beast, moving forward, blah, blah, Reggie Love and me, boner, butt plug, butt sexting, my administration, created a bazillion jobs, hard working resident mexicans, pathway to EBT cards and voting booth, my pen, my pen pal Reggie, my pencil dick, peace, Osama, blah, blah, I killed more brown people then the republicans, Bohner, cry, blah, blah, Red line in sand, Sandy, blah, blah, fat guy in jersey, the end oh and god bless stalin.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:40 | 4378028 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture




But every Lawmaker's like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin' in the bathroom
Blood stains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room,
We don't care, we're driving Cadillacs in our dreams.
But Lawmaker's like Cristal, Maybach, diamonds on your timepiece.
Jet planes, islands, tigers on a gold leash.
We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair.



YOU ROCK:  Elle.  Congrats Grammywise and your time has jusssss begun

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:54 | 4378192 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

OMFG ! you are cracking me up. that's perfect.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 10:36 | 4379492 HamRove
HamRove's picture

You must have the hardcopy transcript.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:03 | 4377920 Gankfest
Gankfest's picture


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:02 | 4377922 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

My fellow Americans

I resign.

Have a good night.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:10 | 4377965 aVileRat
aVileRat's picture

S&P will go to 2,900

Wish we had an Ike. Or a person of Teddy's character (fuck his policies).

What's Colin Powell upto these days ?

Shocking he showed up on time for once.....

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:42 | 4378132 knukles
knukles's picture

$100 billion for factories?
How about to reimburse the GM bond holders for the theft of thier property?

Hiya, friends! Ralph Spoilsport, Ralph Spoilsport Motors, the world's largest new used and used new automobile dealership, Ralph Spoilsport Motors, here in the City of Emphysema. Let's just look at the extras on this fabulous car! Wire-wheel spoke fenders, two-way sneezethrough windvent, star-studded mudguards, sponge-coated edible steering column, chrome fender dents, and factory air-conditioned air from our fully factory-equipped factory. It's a beautiful car, friends, with doors to match! Birch's Blacklist says this automobile was stolen, but for you, friends, the complete price, two thousand five hundred dollars, in easy monthly payments of twenty-five dollars a week, twice a week, and never on Sundays ...
         -firesign theater


Ah yes, the matter of the little theft of General Motors
We do not negotiate with Marxists
How's that Cloward Piven workin' for us, eh?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 00:41 | 4378588 Old_Dog
Old_Dog's picture

"Shadow Valley Condoms....if you lived here you'd be home by now..."


from memory, 40 years of drinking is a terrible thing to waste

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:11 | 4377969 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



then pulls full-automatic out of his coat and starts shooting at randon targets...


I know why I watch.


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 02:39 | 4378798 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

As if anyone would care about "soviets" taking the capitol. As if they have not already taken it.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:42 | 4378388 338
338's picture

Too bad you haven't learned to have a better dream.....


A lone gunman was stopped in a pathetic attempt to divert attention from president Obama's heart felt speech to the American people Tuesday evening.....


In my dream....


In what looked to be a scene from a Spielberg movie, a C-5 Galaxy loaded with an unidentified high order explosive plowed into the capital building this evening, killing......


If you're going to be a bear, be a fucking grizzly.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:49 | 4378083 Millivanilli
Millivanilli's picture

Obama's wife chewbacca looks, ravashing, I mean revolting.   My bad.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:21 | 4378191 Crawdaddy
Crawdaddy's picture

Don't piss off the wookies. They are known to tear arms off.

<notices wookieflotus in crowd shot, on her right a dude with his right arm in a sling and on her left side, a babe with left arm in a sling>

Edit - just saw the guy in the uniform wave. The absolute gayest wave I have ever seen from anyone, much less from a guy in a uniform.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:30 | 4378329 TheInfoman
TheInfoman's picture

Um.  But that would leave Joe Biden in charge.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:05 | 4377930 takeaction
takeaction's picture

Best Live commentary...AWESOME..

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:40 | 4378139 Wahooo
Wahooo's picture

State of the Dictator.  That's great, what a good site.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:08 | 4377953 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

Well said QE49er...You can add no more monkey-hammering PMs to that list.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377979 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

Seriously there are people who watch President Fuckstick? Fuck You Obama

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:34 | 4378104 The Heart
The Heart's picture








Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:44 | 4378144 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



he's just there to prep fo us foar President FistFuck.


Followed by pres. Camacho

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:27 | 4378042 The Vineyard
The Vineyard's picture

Obama is a horrible liar.  But he does look marvelous in a suit.  Methinks he hits the gym quite often.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:37 | 4378126 Oldballplayer
Oldballplayer's picture

Maybe not the gym, but the bath house.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:05 | 4378227 drendebe10
drendebe10's picture

I vote yes. 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:18 | 4378259 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Y U NO...

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 02:31 | 4378788 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Attention all planets of the solar Federation....we have assumed control

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:56 | 4377890 The Gooch
The Gooch's picture

Teleprompter's view.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:57 | 4377896 stant
stant's picture

you will be lied to and threatned shortly

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:21 | 4378024 max2205
max2205's picture

Looks like barry made meth legal tonight.....he looks like shit

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:11 | 4378244 chump666
chump666's picture


that was gold!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:56 | 4377897 No Soup For You
No Soup For You's picture

Short term trade: sell stocks, buy gold now. Nothing O says can possibly make gold go down or stocks go up tomorrow.

(that's a long term trade also, btw)

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:56 | 4377899 nmewn
nmewn's picture


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:06 | 4377938 knukles
knukles's picture


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:08 | 4377954 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

Nah - we just hate the mutherfucker's white half.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:12 | 4377974 knukles
knukles's picture

No wonder cockroaches will no longer reproduce.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:18 | 4378007 infinity8
infinity8's picture

*pencil-necked wood-chucker

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:35 | 4378353 Dinero D. Profit
Dinero D. Profit's picture

The NSA knows whether you're naughty or nice.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:11 | 4377968 nmewn
nmewn's picture

I got an advance copy of this dickheads speech, he issued an Executive Order today to the IRS to go after his enemies.

Its called the 1040 TEA-EZ ;-)

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:23 | 4378035 max2205
max2205's picture

Just look a him...he Is an alien.....

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:38 | 4378131 Oldballplayer
Oldballplayer's picture

Niggah paaaleeezzz.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:19 | 4378008 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

do "concrete proposals" include banker footware?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:47 | 4378170 Crawdaddy
Crawdaddy's picture

Ha! I chuckled on that one.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:59 | 4377902 Robot Traders Mom
Robot Traders Mom's picture

Mindless entertainment.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:11 | 4377966 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Boy, you got that right.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377978 knukles
knukles's picture

Well, at least the mindless part.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:59 | 4377906 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



aaaaah, The State of the Union is, ahh, strong.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:17 | 4377995 Lore
Lore's picture

Absence of Energy guy = No Pipeline

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:18 | 4378005 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



pipeline/no pipeline: we're fucked just the same, somehow

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:00 | 4377908 AllWorkedUp
AllWorkedUp's picture

Does anyone really give a crap what that piece of shit has to say?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:27 | 4378067 tony wilson
tony wilson's picture

yes later a howling bitch noise from obarmy sayin.

reggie i issa a cumin reggie eye issa a comin.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:43 | 4378150 European American
European American's picture

You know one of those moments when you're witnessing something, like, when it's so pathetic, it's embarrassing, and you just can't watch it, it's just too much? That's the way I feel and have felt about this grimy sleazeball since before he ever got into the white house. I don't think I've EVER heard him talk longer than a minute, at most. Usually after just a few seconds I have to stop the "broadcast". he just gives me the creeps. In fact, even to this day, I can't believe he's the PRESIDENT and I keep wondering when the nightmare's gonna' end.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:04 | 4378173 knukles
knukles's picture

I beleive it was Freud who once described the "true nightmare" Die Nachtamare as the one that which when you wake is standing there staring at you and begins chasing you around the bed.

Uh huh....

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:59 | 4377910 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

"***Incoming Transmission"

A broadcast interruption preceded with, " This is [Tyler Durden] speaking, " would be pleasant.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377983 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



I'd love to see the mask

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:25 | 4378045 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

Hmmm...DK what you mean.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:31 | 4378089 seek
seek's picture

Which one? Anonymous or Max Headroom?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:49 | 4378175 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



Tyler Durden mask.


with a lit cigarette.  That would be a nice touch.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:10 | 4378238 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

No masks. Open. Honest. Free. With 3.5 billion lights behind him.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:02 | 4377915 jim249
jim249's picture

Just can't watch it.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:03 | 4377926 Millivanilli
Millivanilli's picture

Oh goodness, it's BULLSHIT TIME!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:15 | 4377991 Yes_Questions
Yes_Questions's picture



get out the waders

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:20 | 4378021 Millivanilli
Millivanilli's picture

If he says he is going to be firm but flexible.  I'm going to puke.  


Azzhole just said America is the place to  invest.   We now have slave labor.  Regardless expect a 2000 pt drop tomorrow. Obozo blessed it- the kiss of death.   


Full fait and credit of the US. LOL  Does he know the fed- daddy warbucks to the bankers, has monetized 3 trillion.  


Expect more of the same.  We are fucked.   Fuck you OBAMA.  



Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:05 | 4377931 erg
erg's picture

He should try helium...couldn't hurt.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:06 | 4377933 Mac Avelli
Mac Avelli's picture

I am going to spend some quality time with my son, and hope that this bum doesn't do too much more damage to his future.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377976 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Hope is always good. Don't really know what to suggest, tho. Learn to speak Spanish and become a certified welder? Maybe.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:05 | 4377935 NitneLiun
NitneLiun's picture

I haven't watched a presidential speech since the yellow cake debacle. I'm sure as shit not going to start again now.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:05 | 4377937 Shrapnel
Shrapnel's picture

More treason in 3..2..1..

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:27 | 4378061 max2205
max2205's picture


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:09 | 4377945 takeaction
takeaction's picture

Can anybody tell me how this name "Boehner" is pronounced Bainer??  It contradicts all grammar rules...right?  

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:09 | 4377955 knukles
knukles's picture

If you grab hold of his name softly and tug a few times, you'll get it.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:09 | 4377960 Pheonyte
Pheonyte's picture

It's German. It should really be pronounced "Ber-ner."

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:31 | 4378080 woerm
woerm's picture

That is correct

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:52 | 4378438 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

But since IT (the Carrot) is in Congress it is correctly pronouned BONE-ER as he is the Dick that is shoved deep into America's asshole.




Cash Talks and Bullshit walks. And the REPUKES can say they were against the ACA but their actions spoke louder than words.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:15 | 4377989 erg
erg's picture

Remember, if the camera cuts to him, that's a drink. If he's crying that's another drink. Preferably something orange.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:07 | 4377948 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

...there go bonds. oopsies!


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:09 | 4377956 tongue.stan
tongue.stan's picture

Let the Orgy Begin!!!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:09 | 4377958 Hughing
Hughing's picture

Iowa and Michigan st are in OT

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377986 DeFeralCat
DeFeralCat's picture

Thanks. Flipped to it. I am drinking on made baskets to fill the gap. 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:20 | 4378009 takeaction
takeaction's picture

The comments here on ZH have so much more content than this jibberish I have opened in another window (O).  LOL

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:00 | 4378216 Crawdaddy
Crawdaddy's picture

I caught the first period at the pizza joint but now I'm back in cable free zone. Iowa was kicking ass on D

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:10 | 4377959 CunnyFunt
CunnyFunt's picture

So much bullshit in such a small chamber.

Schmoozing fucks.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:10 | 4377961 mvsjcl
mvsjcl's picture

There was a time, it seems so far away now, that I actually thought important, indeed noble, words would be heard when listening to this event. Christ, I was so stupid!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:10 | 4377962 PoorMan429
PoorMan429's picture

Duck Dynasty in the HOUSE!  

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:11 | 4378245 Blano
Blano's picture

Should've invited Phil instead of Willie.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:11 | 4377967 FieldingMellish
FieldingMellish's picture

Sorry, working on my daughter's English assignment with her... followed by pulling my fingernails out with pliers... no time for SOTU by POTUS.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:12 | 4377970 tongue.stan
tongue.stan's picture

Gonna take a longs time fo him to blow all dem peoples.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:28 | 4378075 max2205
max2205's picture

Congratulations construction are the new niggg....I mean slaves

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:13 | 4377973 yepyep
yepyep's picture

this is hilarious, its like superbowl of the union up in here.


mindless fucking crap. fall of the republic.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:12 | 4377975 Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

Alice in Chains - Man in the Box live - Better Quality ! (4:42)

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:15 | 4377981 Debt Slave
Debt Slave's picture

I wonder how much Boehner had to drink tonight.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:20 | 4378010 knukles
knukles's picture

Never happen...
Maybe only in a Tom Clancy novel...
But what a hoot if...

All the Republicans just plain got up and silently walked out.

Well come on, that's what dreams are for...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:34 | 4378102 infinity8
infinity8's picture

Boehner really looks toasty. Anyone else hearing whiter-and-tighter in obammie's speeching sounds?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:10 | 4378241 infinity8
infinity8's picture

wow. so many kitchen sinks. this has got to be a record.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:53 | 4378185 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

What spirit goes well with carrot juice?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377982 infinity8
infinity8's picture


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:15 | 4377984 Lore
Lore's picture

Any guesses as to the next False Flag?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:21 | 4378027 are we there yet
are we there yet's picture

The white house when its occupant is gone and no capaign dinners are scheduled.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:32 | 4378094 TuesdayBen
TuesdayBen's picture

US involvement in security at Sochi.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:48 | 4378130 Lore
Lore's picture

Global Warming = Enviro False Flag (big policy vehicle and capital siphon, losing credibility by the day, hence the need to dredge it up NOW)

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:20 | 4378271 Spanky
Spanky's picture

I'm agnostic about global warming. Just don't know enough I guess, but... I have friends in Alaska. Way the fuck out in the bush, some on the coastal plains and river deltas out west. Permafrost is melting in multiple locations according to first person reports. It's ancedotal; make of it what you will.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 04:28 | 4378902 Lore
Lore's picture

Well, I have friends in the Yukon and NWT and Sweden, and they're saying that it's the coldest that they have seen it since the 70s, so make of THAT what you will.  And the ice cap has NOT melted; it's bigger and (most importantly) deeper than ever.  Anyway, the sociopaths themselves admit that science is secondary to the con.  (There are numerous quotes in that regard: look up "The Green Agenda.") Oligarchs are pretty good at inventing bogeymen: they've been doing it for a very long time.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:00 | 4378198 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

The current False Fag is enough. But my first guess would be Hillary. Oh, you said flag. 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 23:20 | 4378263 SgtShaftoe
SgtShaftoe's picture

They're probably ramping up for the concerto finale.  They want to nuke a US city.  Get all the plebians to fall in line.  They're just having problems keeping secrets lately. 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377985 robochess
robochess's picture

When do the "Honeymooners" start... is that Ralph Kramden at the podium with a new get rich quick plan?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:14 | 4377987 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

Clap everyone. Clap!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:25 | 4378044 quasimodo
quasimodo's picture

No shit, I am thinking the court jester is getting some tired shoulders holding up that sign.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:40 | 4378138 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

Robert Redford's Quiz Show?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:15 | 4377988 Smiley
Smiley's picture

No matter what gets promised all I want to know is "Who the is supposed to pay this all?"

If it involves more taxpayer money or errosion of personal freedoms he can go fuck himself in the neck.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:22 | 4378022 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

It is a one-way street from Republic to Despotism; you can count on all his nice words as a dagger in your gut. The name of the street is Democracy.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:22 | 4378023 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

You are, and your kids, and their kids... And so on.... And so on.....

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:16 | 4377990 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

We will now hear what Odumbo's owner-operators consider useful for us to be reminded of. The propaganda du jour, so to speak.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:15 | 4377992 knukles
knukles's picture

To put in Schrodinger terms...
"For fuck's sake, who let the cat out of the box?"

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:23 | 4378034 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

Not Thomas Jefferson, John Adams, or Ben Franklin. Maybe Alexander Hamilton, Abraham Lincoln, and Franklin Roosevelt?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:33 | 4378085 knukles
knukles's picture

Very nice.....



Am I the only one who remembers that his first Christmas in the WH, he had Mao ornaments on the tree?

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:41 | 4378142 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:18 | 4377996 yepyep
yepyep's picture

i love the rediculous over extended clapping session too, its like the over the top receptions kim jong un recieves in nk.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:20 | 4378020 pupdog1
pupdog1's picture

Or else.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:27 | 4378063 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

soon they'll add a laugh track

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:55 | 4378197 dvfco
dvfco's picture

I'd like him visit NK and let litle Kim treat him like he treated his naughty uncle.

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