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The "Real" State Of The Union In Just 889 Words...

Tyler Durden's picture


Submitted by Simon Black via Sovereign Man blog,

Mr. Speaker, Mr. Vice President, members of Congress, fellow citizens:

This summer we will commemorate the 100th anniversary of the start of World War I.

This senseless, destructive war was started and championed by politicians who cared nothing for the 9 million people who lost their lives.

And in doing so, they began a century of warfare which continues to this day.

Our military industrial complex is larger than ever. We have nearly 2 million troops and national guardsmen, plus 3.5 million civilians employed in the defense sector.

With such awesome capabilities, we continue to resort to violence and death to exact political goals which benefit a tiny elite.

All of this has created a police state in the Land of the Free that is a far cry from the country we all grew up in.

Your government has spawned a culture of fear and intimidation. Nearly every federal agency, including the Fish and Wildlife Service, has its own gun-toting police force to pistol-whip citizens into submission.

And we're stocking up. Your government has recently procured 1.6 BILLION rounds of hollow-point ammunition to supplement our existing supplies.

But frankly, we don't need guns to harass citizens.

Our tax authorities have become more threatening than mafia warlords. The plunder is so severe that record numbers of Americans are renouncing their citizenship and leaving the country.

There are now dozens of federal, state, and local agencies and courts which have the power to confiscate your assets without any due process.

In addition to your house, your business, and your savings, we also have the authority to take your children away from you as if they are property of the state.

We are here to tell you what you can and cannot put in your own body, or whether you can collect rainwater that falls on own property.

In fact, on any given business day, the federal government issues hundreds of pages of new 'rules', proposed regulations, draft bills, executive orders, and/or regulatory notices.

And if you are not compliant with these rules, you may be committing a crime. Whether you know it or not.

When this nation was founded, there were four federal crimes on the books. Today there are THOUSANDS. Plus we have millions of government employees at all levels to enforce the penalties.

All of this, of course, is financed by you the tax slave.

You (plus unborn generations) are the poor suckers charged with paying off the national debt we politicians have created.

Officially the debt is just north of $17 trillion. But if you include Social Security and pension shortfalls, the figure is several times higher.

You'll never know for sure because we have become masters of deceit regarding official statistics, whether inflation, unemployment, or our liabilities.

But the situation is so dire that the Congressional Budget Office projects the Social Security Administration's disability insurance trust fund to RUN OUT by 2017.

We get by year after year by increasing the debt. And at well over 100% of GDP, we have truly reached the point of no return.

We are now in a position where we must default. Either we must default on our national debt, or we must default on our obligations to you the citizens.

We may end up stealing your savings. Robbing your Social Security. Taxing you to death. Or simply inflating away the value of our debt.

Naturally, we're going to screw you in the process somehow... so be prepared for that. Especially the inflationary tidal wave that's coming.

Our central bank has expanded its balance sheet at an unprecedented pace, creating massive asset bubbles in its wake. These asset bubbles have disproportionately benefited the ultra-wealthy at the expense of everyone else.

Such wanton money printing has also been tremendously destructive to our credibility. Other nations worry about our reckless irresponsibility. That's why we keep spying on them.

Make no mistake: the consequences of our actions are here. And the days of the United States as the world's dominant superpower are finished.

As the decline hastens, we will struggle to sell our debt to the world and to ship our dollars abroad. Fewer nations will be interested in our empty promises.

And without the generosity of other nations loaning us money at record low interest rates that fail to keep pace with inflation, you will really be screwed.

When this happens, you can absolutely count on us to clamp down even harder on the economy and control even more of your lives. For your own good, of course.

No, this may not be the country that you all grew up in. But it is the state of our union... whatever remains of it.

And so my fellow Americans, I urge you to grab your ankles and get ready for a little 'shared sacrifice'.

But don't worry about me, or my senior staff. We will leave government with cushy pensions, $750,000 speaking fees, board seats on public companies, and top positions in the industries that we have accommodated at your expense.

And of course I will be paid handsomely for the arrogant memoirs I will write in which I deny any responsibility for the shit I've gotten you all into.

So when I say "shared sacrifice", I really mean "your sacrifice".

Thank you. God bless you, and God bless these United States of America.

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Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:44 | 4376710 HedgeAccordingly
HedgeAccordingly's picture

BALLSTEEN!!!!!! the rich are the answer ! Obama persecutes the rich despite being rich himself!  

TOmmy perkins http://hedge.ly/1ectDWB 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:47 | 4376723 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

YO...TPTB....Quit bitch slapping my gold.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:50 | 4376730 Hippocratic Oaf
Hippocratic Oaf's picture

If only this cheap-suit motherfucker would use this speech.

Fuck you, pay me.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 20:41 | 4377602 Raymond K Hessel
Raymond K Hessel's picture

This is the future of American Social Justice....Obamo-Cop!!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:41 | 4377817 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

The Untied States of Amerika. The Republik is dead. Long live the Republik

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:14 | 4376833 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

As only Lawrence Welk could say,

  wonerfullah, wonerfullah.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:49 | 4376957 SeanJKerrigan
SeanJKerrigan's picture

When discussing unfunded liabilities he mentions the insignificant Social Security, but not the goliath that is Medicare? I don't think these people have any clue what they're talking about. All real knowledge comes from math -- doing it and knowing it. Everything else is nice fancy rhetoric.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 18:18 | 4377082 w a l k - a w a y
w a l k - a w a y's picture


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 00:19 | 4378540 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture


“When you can measure what you are speaking about, and express it in numbers, you know something about it, when you cannot express it in numbers, your knowledge is of a meager and unsatisfactory kind; it may be the beginning of knowledge, but you have scarely, in your thoughts advanced to the stage of science.”

--William Thomson (Lord Kelvin)


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:37 | 4377794 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

"Turn of da bubble machine'a"


Wait..that was a bad Flashback to Stan Freburg on the Dr. Demento Show.


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:58 | 4376988 LMAOLORI
LMAOLORI's picture



Empty suit YES but cheap suit I doubt it.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:48 | 4376939 Spygone
Spygone's picture

"as if it owns your children"

Actually, they DO own your children, they are the SURETY against the debt in the banktuptcy of the USA or the corporation of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA which started in 1933. While of course everyone looks at 1913 as the year, 1933 may be the most important yet overlooked year in the History of the USA.


The Bankruptcy of The United States
United States Congressional RecordMarch 17, 1993 Vol. 33, page H-1303

All Debts contracted and Engagements entered into, before the Adoption of this Constitutionshall be as valid against the United States under this Constitution, as under the Confederation.”

SLAVE. A man who is by law deprived of his liberty for life, and becomes theproperty of another. 2. A slave has no political rights, and generally has no civil rights. He can enter into no contract unless specially authorized by law; what he acquires generally, belongs to his master. The children of female slaves follow the condition of their mothers, and are themselves slaves. –Bouvier’s Law, 1856

“The primary control and custody of infants is with the government.” –Tillman V. Roberts. 108 So. 62


“The court stands in the position of parens patria[e] of children.“ –Ayers v. Kelley, 284 Ala. 321, 224 So.2d 673 (1969)?

“”Parens patriae,” literally “parent of the country,” refers traditionally to role of state as sovereign and guardian of persons under legal disability.”–Ex parte Bayliss, 550 So.2d 986, 988 n. 1 (Ala.1989) (quoting Black’s Law Dictionary 1003 (5th ed.1979)).

“The state has a wide range of power for limiting parental freedom and authority in things affecting the child’s welfare… In fact, the entire familial relationship involves the State.” –Prince, 321 U.S. at 167, 64 S.Ct. at 442, 88 L.Ed. 645.

“In other words, the state is the father and mother of the child and the natural parents are not entitled to custody, except upon the state’s beneficent recognition that natural parents presumably will be the best of its citizens to delegate its custodial powers… ‘The law devolves the custody of infant children upon their parents, not so much upon the ground of natural right in the latter, as because the interests of the children, and the good of the public, will, as a general rule, be thereby promoted.’ ” –Chandler v. Whatley, 238 Ala. 206, 208, 189 So. 751, 753 (1939) (quoting Striplin v. Ware, 36 Ala. at 89) (‘ ’).

So, there you go, you are the property, and you have been pledged against the debt, as Mandell House and his buddies told us you would be long ago...


“[Very] soon, every American will be required to register their biological property in a national system designed to keep track of the people and that will operate under the ancient system of pledging.  By such methodology, we can compel people to submit to our agenda, which will effect our security as a chargeback for our fiat paper currency. Every American will be forced to register or suffer being unable to work and earn a living. They will be our chattel, and we will hold the security interest over them forever, by operation of the law merchant under the scheme of secured transactions. 


Americans, by unknowingly or unwittingly delivering the bills of lading to us will be rendered bankrupt and insolvent,   forever to remain economic slaves through taxation, secured by their pledges. They will be stripped of their rights and given a commercial value designed to make us a profit and they will be none the wiser, for not one man in a million could ever figure our plans and, if by accident one or two should figure it out, we have in our arsenal plausible deniability. After all, this is the only logical way to fund government, by floating liens and debt to the registrants in the form of benefits and privileges. This will inevitably reap to us huge profits beyond our wildest expectations and leave every American a contributor to this fraud which we will call  Social Insurance.” Without realizing it, every American will insure us for any loss we may incur and in thismanner, every American will unknowingly be our servant, however begrudgingly. The people will become helpless and without any hope for their redemption and, we will employ the high office of the President of our dummy corporation to foment this plot against America.”



Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:59 | 4376990 PTR
PTR's picture


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 09:52 | 4379328 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

And to prove his point he linked to a gif....

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:50 | 4376733 Catch-22
Catch-22's picture

Obama to Congress: “If I want your opinion, I’ll GIVE IT to you.”

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 18:08 | 4377029 Overfed
Overfed's picture

State of the Police State Address.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:52 | 4376739 gwar5
gwar5's picture

As Good As It Gets II 


Sen. Cruz: When one thinks of Obama you start with a real leader in mind, then you take away all reason and accountability.

Obama: I have been working very hard to help fix the poor and middle class Americans and I'm sure they'll all be back on their knees in no time.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:52 | 4376740 SandiaMan
SandiaMan's picture

Damn thats Good

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:18 | 4376843 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

God bless you, and God bless these United States of America... Hold on just a sec,

Si Juanita, yo quiero un otro pisco sour, por favor.  Si si, con limon, gracias amable.  

Ah yes sorry, where was I ... God Bless Thomas Jefferson, God Bless the Monitor and the Merrimack, God Bless Apple Pie, God Bless Joe DiMaggio, God Bless Elvis Presley, etc.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 21:44 | 4377835 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Joltin' Joe has left and gone away...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:56 | 4376743 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Our State of the union in fourteen words:


My Subjects

I have a pen.

May the squid contintue to fuck your nation.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:57 | 4376765 Peachfuzz
Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:55 | 4376748 kito
kito's picture

for a guy who left the u.s. for supposed greener pastures, simon has an unhealthy obsession with the u.s.  

mr. black, you pussed out and left the u.s. so fuck off. we here in the u.s. will fight our battles when the time comes. we dont need your 2 cents from afar. you are a coward and a spineless opportunist. 

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:58 | 4376762 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Sometimes the most courageous thing to do is walk away.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:17 | 4376844 kaiserhoff
kaiserhoff's picture

Of the sixty six ways to get out of trouble,

  the best is simply to leave.

       Chinese proverb

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 05:06 | 4378933 Joenobody12
Joenobody12's picture

36, not 66.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:53 | 4376968 dearth vader
dearth vader's picture

True, but walking backward will get you survival bonus points.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:00 | 4376776 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Somewhere high in the Patagonian mountains, a peach bellini just spilled.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:18 | 4376847 kito
kito's picture

oh i hope it didnt stain the chilean inflation protection bonds that were in his lap!!!

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:25 | 4376861 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

"Is everything to your satisfaction, senor?" 


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:41 | 4376919 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

Peach bellini - redundant

Don't hate the player, hate the game.

Up arrow though and snarfed my Makers

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:06 | 4376790 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

2 cents? I think you're being a little too generous with the value you put on his advice. Maybe 2 zinc pennies.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:27 | 4376867 Greenskeeper_Carl
Greenskeeper_Carl's picture

regardless of we may think of simon black, there was a lot of truth in that post

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 18:05 | 4377019 Overfed
Overfed's picture

If I had the resources, I would leave this fascist shithole far behind in a New York Minute. And to all of the alphabet soup agencies reading this: fuck off and die a horrible death.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 20:41 | 4377608 kito
kito's picture

you make exuses. you are just another weakling

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 02:17 | 4378762 merizobeach
merizobeach's picture

"we here in the u.s. will fight our battles when the time comes."

No, you won't, because that time has already come and gone.  You sat on your stupid ass while your freedom was confiscated.  That makes you the fucking coward.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 05:04 | 4378932 Joenobody12
Joenobody12's picture

What part of self-exile in protest do you not understand ?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 05:49 | 4378968 Amagnonx
Amagnonx's picture

When you are outnumbered and out gunned - then sniping from cover makes a hell of a lot more sense than a suicidal frontal assault by one man.


Fine post by Simon, and well done in finding some range and cover to shoot from.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:55 | 4376754 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture


This could be the State of the Union address for any President since 1913, just adjust the years (though Eisenhower warned us over half a century ago about the Military Industrial Complex).

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:08 | 4376798 optimator
optimator's picture

Note that he warned us in his "Farewell" address.  He didn't mention it for the eight years he was President during a huge expanse in military spending.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 18:06 | 4377021 Overfed
Overfed's picture

Likely something to do with his addiction to breathing air.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 18:52 | 4377189 CH1
CH1's picture

Note that he warned us in his "Farewell" address.

Yeah, but at least he had the guts to say something.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 22:10 | 4377957 falconflight
falconflight's picture

But he was directly responsible for the killing of a couple of hundred WWI vets camping on the Capital Mall.  I believe he was Gen. McArthur's EO who ordered the attack.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:58 | 4376760 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 16:57 | 4376763 bigrooster
bigrooster's picture

If only a president had the courage to actually speak the truth...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:03 | 4376777 sixsigma cygnus...
sixsigma cygnusatratus's picture

"Mr. Speaker, Mr. Vice President, members of Congress, fellow citizens:


Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:02 | 4376779 Ms. Erable
Ms. Erable's picture

Who gives two shits for what that felching globalist puppet has to say tonight? Lies and half-truths galore, with the signal:noise ratio approaching unity.

Not even going to bother as a drinking game; I'm skipping the noise and heading straight to the drinking part. Paging Mr. Fiddich... Mr. Glen Fidditch... please stand by...

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:04 | 4376783 bh2
bh2's picture

"But it is the state of our union... whatever remains of it."

But it is the police state of our union... whatever remains of it.


There ... fixed it for him.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:05 | 4376789 howenlink
howenlink's picture

I don't have time to read this, I'm on the phone with my broker about making a change to my IRA.

Tue, 01/28/2014 - 17:09 | 4376800 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

I told you before just BTFD. That'll be 5% please. Have a nice day.

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