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"No Brainer" AAPL Breaks Below $500; Lowest In 3 Months

Tyler Durden's picture


For the first time since mid-October, "no brainer" investment AAPL has dropped below the maginot line of $500. We are sure Carl Icahn will be buying another $500 million worth of shares today... AAPL is now down over 13% from its December highs.




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Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:34 | 4379735 Caveman93
Caveman93's picture

Seriously, how many G1-10 iCrap devices does one "need" in this world? Same crap, different "generation" with prettier packaging. They're done.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:41 | 4379789 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

I trust no investment that requires no brains.  

This Gekko prototype should finally retire and then go to a nursing home if he has no brains.  

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:46 | 4379832 aint no fortuna...
aint no fortunate son's picture

I'm thinking his last couple of tweets this past week must have been classic pump and dump moves

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:53 | 4379878 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Nice to see crAAPL dumping!

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:55 | 4379889 Sofa King Confused
Sofa King Confused's picture

Why would people spend money for a NSA spying device?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:00 | 4379918 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Do you ask the same question of people who pay federal taxes?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:04 | 4379935 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

The old Carl "The Phlegm" iCahn tweeted-in-advance Pump & Dump, baby!

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:21 | 4380022 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Nice to see you saying something that makes sense for a change.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:40 | 4379797 Millivanilli
Millivanilli's picture

Icahn just tweeted,  


I just bought bought a gazillion shares!  Jump you fucking lemmings!  



Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:58 | 4379899 eclectic syncretist
eclectic syncretist's picture


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:10 | 4379944 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

Do hope Carl will be OK. Also it's important that Jamie's bonus is safe. These are our real concerns.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:28 | 4380017 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

"Had lunch w/Tim Cook. He's on board with 948 billion USD buyback ASAP. Just bought another 500 mln. ;-) "

@Carl"The Big Phlegm" iCahn

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:46 | 4379831 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

and after 50 upgrades... the iPads and iPhones STILL DON'T HAVE A LIGHTER FOR MY CIGARETTES!!


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:59 | 4379907 eclectic syncretist
eclectic syncretist's picture

Where's the fucking beer dispenser on my iphone Steve!

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:05 | 4379937 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture




Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:13 | 4379976 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

LOL. you're cracking me up.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:25 | 4380030 TuPhat
TuPhat's picture

What's wrong with yours?  Mine does switch TV channels.  You should upgrade.  But, seriously I wish I had a Droid even though I have no need for either one.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:05 | 4380213 Bangin7GramRocks
Bangin7GramRocks's picture

You can.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:08 | 4380236 JuliaS
JuliaS's picture

I cahn?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:34 | 4379741 tallen
tallen's picture

You'd have to have no brain to blindly follow Icahn's tweets.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:00 | 4379911 eclectic syncretist
eclectic syncretist's picture

He'll really look like a no-brainer when it crashes through $400 this year.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:34 | 4379743 Occident Mortal
Occident Mortal's picture

Icahn's Waterloo

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:40 | 4379799 Cursive
Cursive's picture

@Occidental Mortal

Somebody else said yesterday, and I think it is highly probable, Icahn is unwinding.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:16 | 4379988 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

Word is Carl's agitating for the return of Gil Amelio

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:06 | 4380221 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Obscure early 90s reference FTW!

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:35 | 4379744 SquirrelButtDan
SquirrelButtDan's picture

...and it's gone.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:44 | 4379819 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:17 | 4379994 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

That's what you get with virtual apple instead of phyzz apple

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:34 | 4379746 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

Ah, and it was such a pretty Tulip. speculate up, speculate down, whoa, whoa, whoa, we're gonna do the speculate now.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:36 | 4379747 cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

Go ahead Tweety Bird, double down again. Throw some more good money after bad.

You know your ego won't let you be --Gasp-- Wrong

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:34 | 4379750 EmmittFitzhume
EmmittFitzhume's picture

Pump and motherfucking Dump!

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:36 | 4379761 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

I asked SIRI if I should short or long AAPL and all I heard was crickets...SIRI are you there?!?!  SIIIIRRRRRIIII!!!!!!!!

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:37 | 4379762 fijisailor
fijisailor's picture

With every iphone improvement the phone gets less practical.  AAPL has a long way to go down.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:39 | 4379794 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

You are forgetting one thing about AAPL...AAPL Zombies! Ok two things...



Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:37 | 4379763 Frank -THE COIN -
Frank -THE COIN -'s picture

In a debate over AAPL on cnbc yesterday by two analysts, one of them stated " That buying AAPL was a no Brainer "

The other analyst replied " Yes, if you have no Brain, buy AAPL "

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:12 | 4380260 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Buying AAPL at this point is like buying "pre-Rumor", to then sell on the Rumor, and buy the news?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:37 | 4379768 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

again..."all these equities are buys." And I mean EVERY ONE OF THEM.

Go long land...and transfer payments.
Can't say the US will be running trade surpluses yet...but that deficit could drop with surprising alacrity.

Deficits do matter...but with interest rates this low...and going way lower in my view... i just don't see why all the rancor in Washington right now.

"Unilateralism" makes absolutely no sense here.
DC has never had so much money.

Sometimes "all that money only serves to get yourself in trouble."
The private sector has been a "Government in waiting" for some time now though.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:37 | 4379777 user2011
user2011's picture

In the nov, dec,  they drive the market up... up... up... 

Why letting it come down ?   What is going on ?  Are the HFT taking vacation ?    Or is it just time to harvest the fund money from 401K contributions ?   

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:52 | 4379869 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

It's called year end window dressing in order to get that 2 and 20. Can't have people pulling their money out. It makes for a starving hedge fund manager.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:31 | 4379888 kaa1016
kaa1016's picture

Think about it. The market was up 30% last year. If you sell on or before December 31, you have to pay those taxes by April 15th 2014. If you wait one more trading day to January 2, you don't have to pay taxes on those gains for another 16 months. It really is that simple. Selling begets even more selling...

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:39 | 4379780 syntaxterror
syntaxterror's picture

Almost 5 years since the iPad was introduced. And a one size fits all phone for 7 years? And sitting on $150 billion in cash. Where are the new products? 

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:42 | 4379813 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture


sure you can't see it with the naked eye...

and you don't need it...


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:44 | 4379814 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

There are no new products because there is no more design genius at AAPL.  Ives has gotten fatter than a Wellington cow, and the other baby-boomer product development guys are just eying the clock to their retirement.  

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:45 | 4379837 Caveman93
Caveman93's picture

Soon...the iMyRA Box ..guaranteed return and 100% safe T bills supported by the full faith and credit of the USS of A. 

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:45 | 4379839 Caveman93
Caveman93's picture


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:39 | 4379787 NoWayJose
NoWayJose's picture

Let's give credit to where it is due -- the Android operating system.  The Mac flourished because Microsoft was too inept at building a stable, secure, and user friendly operating system for computers.  The early 'smart phones' and tablets had even worse user interfaces.  IOS is still good, but no longer is better than Android.  Thus when you walk into a store today to buy a phone, IOS is no longer an advantage and the choice is now on the phone hardware and price.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:18 | 4380002 Defenestratus
Defenestratus's picture

Android is indeed the reason.


I think the latest numbers pointed to Android activating over 1.5m handsets *A DAY*


Thats incredible - and unsustainable - but Android is a lot more adaptable to market trends.  Its able to be customized, trailored, repackaged and sold to fit almost any kind of demographic from emerging market value phones like the Moto G, to Gold plated HTC One's for you wall street high rollers.

It doesn't rely on an outdated ecosystem whose interrface is clunky, prices inflated and just has the smell of being stagnant.  Google updates the OS twice a year with reference devices that show forward thought with features and capabilities that are truly innovative instead of window dressing like iOS.  Couple that with the ability of Google to enhance users' experiences with its vast amount of information whose integration seems are quickly disappearing and you can see why a lot of iDevices are now being passed over in favor of the more powerful and capable Android devices.  Hell even my father, the most technologically inept being on the planet is able to use his LG G2 effectively - which is something Apple has typically dominated.

Now if you excuse me, my Note 3 just beeped and told me that I have a meeting to attend :P

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:42 | 4379800 Spungo
Spungo's picture

Apple's share price looks like some kind of wall that stops people from moving east to west.

West of the wall I'll wait for you
West of the wall our dreams can all come true
Though we're apart a little while
My heart will wait until we both can smile
That wall built of our sorrow
We know must have an end
Till then dream of tomorrow
When we meet again

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:23 | 4380021 eclectic syncretist
eclectic syncretist's picture

Jody hardly knew when Grandfather started to talk. "I shouldn't stay here, feeling the way I do." He examined his strong old hands. "I feel as though the crossing wasn't worth doing." His eyes moved up the side-hill and stopped on a motionless hawk perched on a dead limb. "I tell those old stories, but they're not what I want to tell. I only know how I want people to feel when I tell them. "It wasn't Indians that were important, nor adventures, nor even getting out here. It was a whole bunch of people made into one big crawling beast. And I was the head. It was Westering and Westering. Every man wanted something for himself, but the big beast that was all of them wanted only Westering. I was the leader, but if I hadn't been there, someone else would have been the head. The thing had to have a head. "Under the little bushes the shadows were black at white noonday.  When we saw the mountains at last, we cried-all of us. But it wasn't getting here that mattered, it was movement and Westering. “We carried life out here and set it down the way those ants carry eggs. And I was the leader. The Westering was as big as God, and the slow steps that made the movement piled up and piled up until the continent was crossed." "When we came down to the sea, and it was done." He stopped and wiped his eyes until the rims were red. "That's what I should be telling instead of stories." When Jody spoke, Grandfather started and looked down at him. "Maybe I could lead the people someday," Jody said. The old man smiled. "There's no place to go. There's the ocean to stop you. There's a line of old men along the shore hating the ocean because it stopped them."

"In boats I might, sir." "No place to go, Jody. Every place is taken. But that's not the worst-no, not the worst. Westering has died out of the people. Westering isn't a hunger any more. It's all done. Your father is right. It is finished."

John Steinbeck, The Red Pony


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:41 | 4379807 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture






Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:18 | 4380007 SAT 800
SAT 800's picture

So, I'm thinking you'd rather have a crate of cherry beer from Belgium, and skip the Apple Stock? Well, actually, I agree with you.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:44 | 4380114 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

2.45% dividend, $45 share cash/share, $136 book/share, 12 P/E, 10 forward P/E. Not bad. Mature biz but not bad at all.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:21 | 4380300 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

So if earnings shrink, do you like it here, or at $300? 

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:46 | 4379838 Spungo
Spungo's picture

They need their design team to take a bunch of LSD like Steve Jobs did. When you're a sucrose molecule dissolving in water, you'll know what the next big product will be. iSugar - it's like sugar but it doesn't dissolve in water (because it's actually sand).

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:48 | 4379848 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

That's what happens when a company sit on it's laurels and runs out of ideas.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:54 | 4379887 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Apple needs to plate its iJunk with some "exotic alloy" and then double the price.

Perceived value, my friend.

There's a reason we diseducate our populace.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:48 | 4379851 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

A handset maker is a handset maker.  This is just Blackberry all over again.  Same hype.  Same basic products.  Same market.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 11:54 | 4379880 Hedgetard55
Hedgetard55's picture

Kevin Henry: "Must...keep...CrAAPL...above $ all...costs."

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:05 | 4379931 Agent P
Agent P's picture

How does the saying go?

"If you liked it at $550, you were wrong"

Something like that. 

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:10 | 4379968 pragmatic hobo
pragmatic hobo's picture

I have a feeling this won't be icahn's year ...

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:26 | 4380029 eclectic syncretist
eclectic syncretist's picture

Did the dumbass tweet with an iphone or a Galaxy?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:28 | 4380041 pragmatic hobo
pragmatic hobo's picture

probably a typewriter ...

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:32 | 4380053 Waterfallsparkles
Waterfallsparkles's picture

I think IChan has the beginings of Alzhimers.  I guess you could say that is a "No Brainer".

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:39 | 4380078 adr
adr's picture


Well only one model and 64bit processing doesn't really do much for Twitter and the 99% of apps not designed for it that could easily run on a desktop computer from 1999.


The best phone is an unlocked Xperia Z with Cyanogen mod. You can install privacy software, private corporate email, etc. Then you can laugh at all the people with cracked iPhone screens. One thing that really angers iPhone snobs is taking your Experia phone and tossing it in a fountain, preferable with a video playing. The shock on their faces is priceless while they hug their precious iPhone muttering prayers to the cult of Jobs.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 12:48 | 4380156 Waterfallsparkles
Waterfallsparkles's picture

I would be interested to know how much he is paying CNBC to pump his stocks.  It seems like that is all they talk about is Carl Ichan and his stocks.  How much does air time cost these days?

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:02 | 4380200 johnjkiii
johnjkiii's picture

That's why we issued our warning last week.


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:02 | 4380201 johnjkiii
johnjkiii's picture

That's why we issued our warning last week.


Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:17 | 4380280 Bangin7GramRocks
Bangin7GramRocks's picture

I like my Iphone 5s. It works for me. But Android is good too. Why do people piss all over Apple? Google is long rumored to BE NSA, not just complicit. Do you really think your Sony Experia is safe from the NSA? If so, you need the Get A Clue app. It's 99 cents in Google play store. The thing about Apple is that they never really try to pump the stock. They could put out tons of shitty products each year to satisfy the sycophant analysts. Who knows what the proper stock price should be, but it is a good company that is historically profitable. Don't understand the hatred.

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 13:54 | 4380458 starman
starman's picture

Idick! now in 4 colors and two sizes!

Wed, 01/29/2014 - 14:41 | 4380669 vyeung
vyeung's picture

Carl, just look yourself in the mirror and suck it up. Apple without Jobs is a sinking ship. Who want a 3inch screen when you can have a 4+ inch one. Who wants to pay a premium on old tech when you can get the latest. You can only con the consumer for so long. The chinese certainly woke up real fast. Cook made a deal with China Mobile, but they aren't selling shite. Android simply is the consumers choice right now. Windows/Mac war repeating itself, but this time its moving even quicker. Cook isn't no Jobs, so say goodbye to that cash and innovation.

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