Stocks Rip; Bonds & Bullion Dip On "Bad News Is Great News" USDJPY Lift

Tyler Durden's picture

"Not beating expectations" is the new "killing it" if today's markets are any judge. First, Facebook is up 19% ($150bn market cap). Gold and silver are being monkey-hammered in their new normal "I don't always sell gold, but when I do, I do it all at once in massive size) manner. Bond yields are pressing 3-4bps higher. The USD is surging (as JPY and EUR weakness trumps AUD strength) and that should provide the hint as to what is levitating stocks... JPY carry correlation remains extreme as the USDJPY bounce off 102 holds for now (and NKY is catching up).


Spot The Difference...


The S&P futures have levitated back to Tuesday's closing VWAP...


Gold and silver are slammed as Oil surges...


Nope no over-reaction here...


Nikkei is catching up to USDJPY...


Charts: Bloomberg


Bonus Chart: Thursday Humor...


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Sudden Debt's picture

It's just sickening...


gjp's picture

Sell emerging markets!  Sell precious metals!  Buy Facebook!

Fuck Wall Street

DeadFred's picture

There was never any real chance that the collapse would come straight after making new all time highs. They will get at least one small rally. Sit back and wait for it to top out. Will it take out the previous highs? If not then you get your hopes up.

Lewshine's picture


I beg to differ, every rally will be sold  - Smart money knows if they can't get 30 to 50% returns, the risk is better in cash @ minus 3%.

Pigs get slaughtered.

Greenskeeper_Carl's picture

don't forget twitter. I gots to have me some of that twitter!

TheRideNeverEnds's picture

make sure you hedge your Facebook long deltas with some long Tesla and Pandora.

Max Damage's picture

FB - 150bill
Amazon - 176 bill
Twitter - 50 bill inc all options
Yelp - 5bill
Netflix - 24 billion
Solar city - 6 bill
Tesla - 22 billion

430 billion just on those 7 companies, and only 2 of them make any money, and even those 2 make peanuts

Sudden Debt's picture

yeah... FB's P/E should pass right over 150 today...

unrulian's picture

PMs : What comes after monkey hammered? Perhaps Donkey hammered?

yogibear's picture

During the DOT COM days  there were loads of companies with no earnings.

Feels like the DOT COM days again except now it's social media.

Cooking of the books will fix everything nowadays.

WarriorClass's picture

"I don't always sell gold, but when I do, I do it all at once in massive size... even if I don't really have any."

Boozer's picture

@WarriorClass - Our very own BuckarooBanzai coined that snarky line some time ago

after a 3am, 200k ounce nanosec sale.  I remember it well as beer shot out of

my nose.  Seems to have caught on.

Race Car Driver's picture

> It's just sickening...

... day after day, after day, after day ....

How much longer can this shit go on? What's it gonna take?

It's no wonder there's no news about the good guys catching the bad guys ... there are no good guys left.

The_Ungrateful_Yid's picture

When the ponzi scheme unravels. Until then enjoy the shit show. I am.

Bearwagon's picture

STFR! I mean it!

Grande Tetons's picture

Great...the retardfest is back. Long USD/JPY.

idea_hamster's picture

Quick -- everyone to this side of the canoe!  What could go wrong? 

Grande Tetons's picture

I watched a nature show the other night about Salmon. As we all know, they swim up stream and then die. The others get munched on by bears and eagles.  

Nature is fucking is fighting the trend in this market. 

jcaz's picture

Yep-  dumbasses never get it-  it's NOT good when they rip up at the open like this,  but hey, go ahead and go all-in,  try to pick up another 10 pts on FB after it opens up 10, cause that's how it always happens, uh huh.......

Confundido's picture

Folks, I've been saying it all along: Gold will not shine as long as the ECB debates whether or not to charge...CHARGE...(not pay) interest on its deposit account. And the signal that you should be looking for is the announcement of a central bank selling its gold reserves. That will mark the bottom, just like it did in 1999. This does not mean that we will see gold going below 1,180. Perhaps we do. But it can perfectly stay where it is for another year.

fockewulf190's picture

Which EU central bank has gold to sell?

Kaiser Sousa's picture

most just cant see the end game is here....

"The major countries will no longer tolerate the monetary manipulation with the global currency in the same unilateral manner with which Nixon changed the Bretton Woods agreement back in 1971 by ending dollar convertibility to gold, rather than devaluing against it.

For lack of a better alternative or term, I settled on the SDR, made up of a new basket of currencies and commodities, almost certainly including gold, and quite possible silver, if China, Russia, et al. have their way.

Right now the nations are in the 'negotiation stage,' with the Anglo-American banking cartel putting up a strong resistance for any changes to their 'exorbitant privilege.'  I would not be surprised to see more forex and precious metal games played as the Lords of Finance flex their monetary muscles.

And then there is the question of the tangled web of rehypothecation of bullion without public disclosure.  It could prove to be very embarrassing to some.
But change is coming, one way or another."

Confundido's picture

I did not say a central bank would sell nor that there are EU central banks with gold to sell. I said that it would be announced, that a central bank would sell. 

Diablo's picture

But...but...what about the JPM vaults??? what about China/India/Tajikistan all lining up to buy gold???? What about all those sold out 1/25 ounce Falkland Islands gold coins???? 

BUAHAHAHA  all you sucker gold idiots got fooled once again!!!  This is just too easy!!!!

fooshorter's picture

And what bitcoin? Don't be so naive, when THEY want it down, it will be down. I'll keep stacking while you buy those wonderful paper assets the elite will gladly sell to you.

eclectic syncretist's picture

They are providing a gift to anyone wise enough to recognize it and brave enough to act on it.

Kaiser Sousa's picture

yeah, we all got fooled...

just like the rest of the fools over the past 5000 years...

just like The Rothchilds and their Central Banks who r hoarding the shit while dispensing to you worthless peices of debt coupon currecny been fooled....

Yeah, you killing it in the Fraud Market im sure...

or maybe, you first in line for that killer MyRa...

you r definetely the man....

Silver at $18....thats so funny...

laughing all the way to my dealer later this morning...



TheGoldMyth's picture

It is indeed "too easy.  Described as a "no brainer" in some circles, in particular, due to the ability of the 1% to print paper debt/leverage. "FOr thE fiRst tiMe in hiStoRy, tHe 1% OwN 99% oF THe gOld or in the process of  And so thus........the top 1% have defaulted into becoming the buyers of last resort (Physical or otherwise.) and without this gold buyer of last resort, the value of this medium of exchange would have collapsed to around 10 dollars an ounce in my reckoning of this crapola of botulistic proportion.

I present this angle often due to the emergence of this new factor that is hardly mentioned at this time by other emerging economic junior rangers like myself :-).

yogibear's picture

The only way the Federal Reserve really stop printing is if the US dollar free-falls. It's only thing that would make the fed fearful.  

ghostzapper's picture

Do you think they are literally "tapering" or jawboning a taper?  Of course the routine audits of the Fed will show us.  Ooops.  

ghostzapper's picture

Facebook is worth $150 Billion and Bitcoin has a total market value of about $10 Billion.  hey every once in a while in life they throw you a gap that shows how much movement could easily take place if one considers the potential value of certain things.  Hmmmmm, wasting time and chit chatting about Bieber versus a platform for the world's new financial system I'll have to think about that one.    

lordylord's picture

Facebook provides a lot of valuable info on its users to corporations and governments.  That's worth a lot. Bitcoin will catch up  when it starts to do the same and provide government with every transaction ever.  If not Bitcoin then it will be Bitcoin 2.0 (i.e. FEDcoin). 

ghostzapper's picture

Nobody "has to" remain a FB member or join but I agree they do sling around the data on the peeps and there is some value there.  I don't see the stickiness though as people understand they are being whored out.  OMG LOL what will I do without Facebook?

On the other hand people do indeed have to transact in commerce and function in day to day life in some way, shape, or form using some type of currency and financial system.  If you can consider BTC in this sense and the total market value of gold (subject to the data spoonfed to you by TPTB) then BTC could make FB look like peanuts when the dust settles.  I do believe people will ultimately see that Gold/BTC is a marriage that makes sense.  they complement each other they are not enemies.  

lordylord's picture

I would argue that the vast majority of FB users are too ignorant to know that their data is being sold.  But that is beside the point.  Yes, as of now BTC has value and that value could increase.  It could also go to zero pending the whims of governments. 

eclectic syncretist's picture

Fuck me!   I'm starting to feel like I'm going to have to put out some (as always non-margined) short lines on NFLX and FB just to be able to sleep peacefully at night. 

Seasmoke's picture

Why are we back to bad news, is good news. ..... thought that was only so QE could continue without Taper ...... I'm really getting close to stop following's a farce.....I will know when I wake up one day , that it has all collapsed..... doesn't look like I need to pay attention every hour of every day......I'm going to miss ZeroHedge, but it's obvious it's now a waste of time. 

John Bigboote's picture

I'm right behind you. Fuck this.

HardAssets's picture

Well, its tough to follow 'the markets' when there are no real markets.

TeamDepends's picture

So who are the chimps buying Facebook?  We demand answers!

syntaxterror's picture

The same ones buying NFLX, AMZN, TWTR, and PCLN.

The_Ungrateful_Yid's picture

WE had a 5% correction in the past week and a half...Yellen is signaling to all you fuckers to BTFD and get your money back into the markets.....expect this charade to continue all year.

Hulk's picture

Remember, they have that little German repatriation Gold thing hanging over their head,  the vaults are empty and Asia is taking in physical as fast as swizerland can melt it down and deliver it. These are cornered animals and they are behaving like it...

Sudden Debt's picture

would it be wise to start shorting facebook?

eclectic syncretist's picture

Never short on margin would be my only advice.

Bearwagon's picture

According to all my bearish knowledge it would be - so, NO! It would not be advisable in todays "markets" ...

Sudden Debt's picture

and what about friday? :)

I'm waiting one day, maybe 2 and I'll short it for 500 bucks.

Gota at least try right?

I'll take a jan. 2015 put 50