GM Slides On Big Miss As Jim Cramer Does It Again

Tyler Durden's picture




 

What better way to assure your company has an earnings bomb? Have Jim Cramer tout it before earnings of course. Sure enough from January 28: "GM sales are going to be superb", and "Europe's coming back." Fast forward to today when GM reports Q4 revenues of $40.5 billion which missed expectations of $40.9 billion, and EPS of $0.67 vs the $0.87 expected. Additionally, GM's global market share just dropped to 11.4% - matching the lowest in the past year.

So much for the superb sales. As for Europe? Well, as the chart below shows, Europe just posted its weakest quarter in the past year...

And don't count on much growth either: CapEx was down to $7.5 billion in 2013, from $8.1 billion in 2012, even as the company's total free cash flow declined from $4.3 billion last year to just $3.7 billion.

 

And all this even despite the second highest channel stuffing in post-bankrutpcy company history:

 

Sure enough, stock does this:

Finally, heeeeeeere's Cramer.

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Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:19 | 4407363 Sterling Rod
Sterling Rod's picture

Buh Buy Bye... to those taxpayer funds

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:22 | 4407367 Motorhead
Motorhead's picture

Cramer...another member of the Dorkus Maximus club.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:27 | 4407390 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

A couple more calls like this and Cramer can write his own ticket at Fox Business.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:35 | 4407424 Gringo Viejo
Gringo Viejo's picture

Wonder how many sheeple this guy has sodomized over the past 15 years?

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:24 | 4407580 Silver Sativa
Silver Sativa's picture

Ouch.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 11:29 | 4407739 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

Cramer either looks drunk in that clip slurring his words or else he's chewing the hell out of his gums after a few lines of coke..
weird mouth movements

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 11:40 | 4407781 Gankfest
Gankfest's picture

BoA lol, nuff said!

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 12:58 | 4408058 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

<-- Coke

<-- Alcohol

I'm going to go with coke.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 12:16 | 4407920 buttmint
buttmint's picture

El Gringo..ouch...but any of us have friends that after they depart, we NEED to pick up the hash pipe? After a Cramer viewing, I need to roll a spliff out of newspaper!

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:34 | 4407426 eurogold
eurogold's picture

Cramer is such a douchebag. I can't understand why he is still given Air-Time

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:42 | 4407446 Motorhead
Motorhead's picture

That clown is a member of the Douchebagus Maximus Club as well.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:01 | 4407510 bobnoxy
bobnoxy's picture

''Cramer is such a douchebag. I can't understand why he is still given Air-Time''

Let me take a shot at that one. Because he's willing to say anything for a paycheck he couldn't get anywhere else, like those clowns Kernan and Kudlow whose ratings have tanked when people stopped listening to them, but they keep their jobs anyway?

Maybe you just don't listen to any of them, so you just don't know how utterly inane they are. But they answered those job ads for lying whores, and someone had to get in.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:03 | 4407518 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Douche songs for Cramer King Douche!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5H1emuFJ0sw

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 11:57 | 4407856 Lux Fiat
Lux Fiat's picture

For some reason "Oops I did it again" by BS comes to mind.

 

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 11:22 | 4407707 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

Cramer has no idea how bad it is out there, NO IDEA, he has no IDEA...
He needs to open the (discount) window... and take a look out... He has No Idea!

Ed: that's quite enough Cramer jokes for now...

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 13:28 | 4408138 Rafferty
Rafferty's picture

I can understand why he's given airtime. He's a corrupt shill who'll say anything his handlers wasnt him to.

 

What I do not understand is how anybody - anybody - would listen to him.  He's been so utterly discredited he's become a parody of himself.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 11:25 | 4407725 Earth Ling
Earth Ling's picture

Cramer is not only a dorkus maximus, he is a flat out criminal.  Read this expose by a former journalist from the Columbia Journalism Review to find out just how bad he is and how bad his fellows are in the financial journalism industry. 

http://www.deepcapture.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/deepcapture-the-story-v1.pdf

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:21 | 4407368 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Boris is have joke...

Q: What kind of idiot is invest in General Motor?

A: American taxpayer

Okay, okay, is more sad story than is joke.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:48 | 4407467 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Is more truth than is joke.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:59 | 4407505 R-502
R-502's picture

We were taken there at gunpoint.... we didn't bail them out , our politicians threw our money at them. Don't forget all those bondholders that got screwed. Looks like the UAW is the only outfit that got the golden parachute in that deal.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:05 | 4407524 replaceme
replaceme's picture

I never not laugh at a boris joke, please to keep them coming!

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:05 | 4407525 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

But that joke isn't funny any more .....

 

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:36 | 4407433 The Dunce
The Dunce's picture

Cramer's a clown.  I can't remember the last time that asshat got anything right.  Dork.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:47 | 4407471 satoshi911
satoshi911's picture

Once upon a time he richest stock broker in Israel, before he come to ameriKKKa and be expert.

Me thinks that he knows something about GOYIM you not know.

Goldman Sachs called Cramer the 'Great White Hope' Back in the day, you saying GS can't pick em?

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 13:31 | 4408147 Rafferty
Rafferty's picture

Interesting.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:52 | 4407488 satoshi911
satoshi911's picture

Sorry asia wife call me for quckie, never say no to woman with 'knife'

So Cramer, he sent to USA by Israel, he slip on yellow fruit, Israel say he damage head, and he to be left in USA.

MSM discovers Cramer and puts him on TV, the rest is history.

You keep Cramer, Israel not want him back.

 

xx00xx

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 14:24 | 4408398 Crash Overide
Crash Overide's picture

If you listen to Cramer you deserve to loose your money.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:49 | 4407473 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

GETTING BACK TO REAMING

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:02 | 4407508 Secede Or Die
Secede Or Die's picture

That train left the station long ago....

Here's how to get rich:
1. Listen to Cramer
2. Do opposit

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:19 | 4407364 syntaxterror
syntaxterror's picture

But that new $75,000 Camaro Z28 is gonna be a smash hit.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:21 | 4407372 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

75K?.... don't you want any options on that car?... like a radio and stuff?

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:24 | 4407376 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

When Thelma and Louise is behind wheel of large automobile, you are not want to hitch ride.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:03 | 4407515 fockewulf190
fockewulf190's picture

Maybe some backdoor action and then bailing out before they fly off the cliff.  Can´t let opportunity pass you by.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:32 | 4407415 de3de8
de3de8's picture

And Z06

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:22 | 4407579 Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

75K?  That's a lot of money for a Chevy!

 

FORWARD SOVIET!

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:22 | 4407365 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

Cash for clunkers... wanne bet? 3...2...1...

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:23 | 4407371 Motorhead
Motorhead's picture

I'll bet you a Grimbergen it won't happen.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:24 | 4407374 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

TRIPPLE!

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:23 | 4407379 Motorhead
Motorhead's picture

O.k., it's a deal!

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:21 | 4407370 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

Weather...Excuse Roulette Wheel land on again?

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:25 | 4407383 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

What is AmeriKan CEO do for blaming of bad corporate performing before weather is invented?

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:29 | 4407409 mofreedom
mofreedom's picture

If CEO or Gub could control the weather, they'd screw that up too.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:34 | 4407417 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Q: How many CEO is screw incandescent light bulb?

A: CEO is too busy screw shareholder, ripping customer, and negotiate severance packaging for light bulb - is have illegal immigrant custodial staff attend light bulb.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:35 | 4407431 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

Sorry, Boris is apologies for political lack of correctness... "custodial staff lacking of official documentation"

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:35 | 4407422 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Regulations...so we got rid of them. (Well it was true that regulations stifled business. I am not suggesting that getting rid of them was bad.)

Now we have to get rid of all the weather. We will remove the atmosphere. That will be bad...very bad for business.

 

I think that ridding ourselves of Cramer may be a better alternative. But no...The Weather has to go.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:25 | 4407583 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

Didn't GM have that high-faluting new Lady CEO?

Guess Sox rules are too much for her?  No worries, they are just guidelines, anyway

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 09:22 | 4407375 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Cramer is one of the cretins at the top of my list that I would like to punch square in the face.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:02 | 4407513 teolawki
teolawki's picture

<-----  Like this?

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:45 | 4407620 Woodhippie
Woodhippie's picture

Thanks for the morning laugh .. now I need to wipe up the coffee off my monitor.

Thu, 02/06/2014 - 10:55 | 4407641 Smiley
Smiley's picture

"I didn't quite catch that, Lou"

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