Thursday Trivia: Why Are Wall Street Economists Paid Millions Of Dollars?

Tyler Durden's picture

The answer: to be horrible weathermen.


In retrospect, it is hardly surprising that two years ago in a head to head between Joe LaVorgna and the world's most famous weatherman, Groundhog Phil, the Deutsche Bank cheerleader was solidly trounced.

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Obchelli's picture

This guy is either very stupid or has no conscience left...

But me thinks - it's both...

eatthebanksters's picture

Either way, ZH revealed him for what he is...the back end of a donkey.

SoberOne's picture

They are paid to dupe people into believing what is real. I.e Paul Krugman.

Soul Glow's picture

If Joe LaVagina were a WWE wrestler he would be called "The Weatherman".  Bringing loud noise and bright lights where ever he goes!

Joe Lavagina walks into an almost empty stadium.  Only Paul Krugman sits in a chair, eating a large buttered popcorn in a dimly lit arena.

"I am LaVagina and I bring with me the science of economics!  Due to weather problems the economy has fallen short of expectations!"

"Yippie!"  Cheered Paul Krugman.

"But we do have forward guidence - based on stock market prices and manipulated employment records - up for the next 20 quarters!"

"Well said!"  Screamed Krugman.

Then, in a flash, LaVagina ran off of the stage, only to be see next quarter when he would spout the same bullshit.

jbvtme's picture

obviously, he's over tipping his barber...

wallstreetaposteriori's picture

LaVorgna is on zerohedge... his handle is FONESTAR..

LMAOLORI's picture



He looks like Mr. Potato Head not much the barber can do

StychoKiller's picture

Hmm Groundhog barbering...

DavrosoftheDaleks's picture

That's a dis to the fine charisma of people like Superstar Billy Graham:

I'd invest whatever the hell he said I should buy. Actually I hocked my TV after hearing this...


Occident Mortal's picture

A 51% win/lose ratio??


Wow, imagine the possibilities you could reap with such an advantage.

derek_vineyard's picture

aren't millions minimum wage on wall street?

Drachma's picture

Why not make up the low spread on a high volume of predictions? ;)

HamRove's picture

I remember when Alan Greenspan came out to the media not too long ago and said the economy was "Broken" Suddenly Krugman swooped in and attacked him in a separate article saying Greenspan was the "Worst" FED chairman ever...

This happened late last year.

Krugman tows the banker line, nothing more. His WHORENESS runs deep.

caShOnlY's picture

just call him what he is:  DEEP THROAT

Ignatius's picture

That works on so many levels....

Cacete de Ouro's picture

This guy LaVorgna looks like he is wearing a beaver on top of his head. Maybe he should have done a deal with Punxsutawney Phil and just let Phil sit on his head and whisper in his ear.

petolo's picture

The North end of a donkey heading South or is it the road apples he left behind.

Groundhog Day's picture

All economists at these tbtf institutions are sell outs.  they will write whwt their pay masters tell them to

Berspankme's picture

Young Joseph is a douchebag

PT's picture

Bingo Groundhog Day.  They are paid propagandists.  TPTB tell them their plans.  The Economists are paid to reword it in a form that pretends to be good for the public.  "Ve haf scientific proof zat you vil be richer if only you are poorer!"  ( And apologies to all people out there who speak English with a thick German accent ;)     )

PT's picture


"We let you borrow more money.   Now it is "more affordable".

If Marie Antoinette were alive today, she would not allegedly have said, "Let them eat cake".  The media would proudly be proclaiming she said, "Let them eat crumbs."  Proof?  "Trickle-Down Effect".  I never understood how they got away with that one.  It sounded loud and clear to me, so in case there is anyone out there that still doesn't get it, forgive me while I say it again :


Why did the media never pick up on that???  Someone should have said it yeeeeeeeeeeears ago. 

PT's picture

The real economists are unemployed.  The employed economists are propagandists.

Grinder74's picture

Someone needs to seriously spam his twitbutt account.

Chupacabra-322's picture

@ Obchelli,

Na, he's just a Douche Bag!

NoPasaran's picture

There is no "either...or", it is all "no conscience left".

Payne's picture

Economists are horrible on purpose so that you need JP Morgan and the FED for guidance.

BobPaulson's picture

Their job is to be the fake guy who wins in three card Monte while the mark is watching.

BandGap's picture

Hey, he offers this unique insight for FREE.

In the land of the blind (this guy) the one eyed man is king. Keep both eyes peeled.

Crash Overide's picture

I thought Wall Street controlled the weather? Doesn't Blythe Masters have the remote control to move a commodity markets with a push of a button?

Dr. Engali's picture

LaVorngna looks like a semi-grown white Urkel.

superflex's picture

Look at the head on that potato.

Mom needed a few extra stitches after pushing out that alien.

SteveGennisonBallWasher's picture

haha. Love it.  Kinda like Geitner and Beavis.

superflex's picture

I bet he liked to burn FRN's and chant Fire, Fire, Fire!

krispkritter's picture

The new Al reports and bad investment advice, all in one!

OwnSilverPlayMusic's picture

You guys missed this one:


Feb 19

Jan housing starts fell -16% (880k) while permits were down a lesser -5% (937k). Harsh wintry winter was clearly a factor dampening activity.


Harsh wintry winter? WOW

FieldingMellish's picture

The groundhog is cuter and has more personality as well.

Agent P's picture

If he loses his job as an economist, he could always get a job as a drive-in movie screen...his forehead is more like a fiveandahalfhead. 

Randoom Thought's picture

Silly me ... and I thought it was to give cover to theft and fraud under the guise of superior and reputable education.

NoDebt's picture

LaVorgna goes to the gun range. His first shot is 5 feet left of the target. Second shot is 5 feet to the right. He yells "BULLSEYE!"

Soul Glow's picture

....and he sticks out his hand and says, "Pay me."

lizzy36's picture


Why for did ONLINE retail sales fall 0.6% in January.

halfawake's picture

weather froze the bits running through the internet.