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Presenting The #1 Financial Haven For Dictators & Criminals

Tyler Durden's picture


Submitted by Simon Black of Sovereign Man blog,

Pop quiz: When really nasty criminals and dictators want to hide their illicit gains, which country do they go to?

I’ll make this easy for you - multiple choice:

a) Switzerland
b) British Virgin Islands
c) Hong Kong

With all the drama, history, and stigma surrounding Switzerland, most people would choose (A).

Yet over the last few years, Switzerland has worked hard to shed this reputation, even going so far as to propose laws making it easier for them to freeze dictators’ funds.

But in reality, the correct answer to the question is (D), none of the above. It’s the United States of America.

Despite being at the forefront for every other country in the world to eradicate banking privacy, the US government has hardly done a thing about the huge cracks in its own banking system… at least when it comes to foreigners.

Many states ranging from Delaware to New Mexico boast corporate entities that can be completely private, especially for foreign shareholders.

Not to mention, attorney-client privilege laws in the US mean that a lawyer can be inserted between a foreigner and their Delaware bank account, making the funds virtually untraceable back to the original shareholder overseas.

Last– the US banking system is so large with hundreds of billions of dollars of inflows and outflows, it’s quite easy for several hundred million to slip right past the radar.

So if you’re a villainous dictator who has plundered your citizens’ wealth, you’d be a fool to stash that cash away in Switzerland. Wall Street banks are waiting with open arms, and Saul Goodman is just a phone call away.

None of this, by the way, is any wild conspiracy theory. It’s all fact… validated by the US government itself.

You see, the Financial Crimes Enforcement Network (FinCEN), an agency of the US Treasury Department, sent out a rather frantic email blast to banks across the United States yesterday about former Ukrainian President Viktor Yanukovych.

Mr. Yanukovych recently fled his home country and is on the run from mass murder charges. And as you can imagine, he has spent years plundering the wealth of Ukraine.

FinCEN recognizes that Yanukovych has substantial assets stashed away in the Land of the Free… and they’re keen to avoid yet another embarrasing public scandal in which the US banking system is caught financing a fugitive dictator.

So their email yesterday was a not-so-subtle suggestion to banks across the country that they should sound the alarm bells with respect to “suspicious movements of assets related to Viktor Yanukovych. . . and other senior officials resigning from their positions or departing Kyiv.”

It certainly begs the question– why would FinCEN send out such an admonishment to US banks?

Simple. Because while ordinary citizens are treated like dairy cows and medieval serfs, FinCEN knows that the United States is the #1 financial safe haven in the world for foreign criminals and dictators.


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Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:22 | 4480904 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

USA takes the gold!

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:25 | 4480919 Uber Vandal
Uber Vandal's picture


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:26 | 4480929 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

What about the fact that foreign nationals pay no capital gains tax on equities?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:33 | 4480959 fonestar
fonestar's picture

My guess is that in five years it will be Bitcoin.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:34 | 4480965 BoNeSxxx
BoNeSxxx's picture

Please stop

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:37 | 4480987 XitSam
XitSam's picture

Don't feed the troll.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:47 | 4481066 Thought Processor
Thought Processor's picture


Just ask the Marcos Family.


They live like kings now in Hawaii.  Sorry, that should be Kings with a capital 'K'.



Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:04 | 4481172 SilverDOG
SilverDOG's picture

Yeah sure, c'mon you rich suckas.

Keep the US banking system ALIVE!

Without the "hidden" billions from rich drug cartels, CIA/US mlitary heroin sales 

and distribution, hedgefunds, HFT & friends profits/theft.

None of the avanues of finacial escape would be open. Why?

Cuz as soon as dollar retreats against the YUAN; game over.

Thus the rich with their foots and $$ in the door get appendages loped off.

Only "distraction" available; WW3. Coming soon to a worls near you.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 21:15 | 4482887 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

Great!  Learn from the pros.  Set yourself up with a private corporate entity (otherwise known as a trust) and shield your assets and income from governmental scrutiny too.  Shit, it's how the bloodline families have been able to hold their wealth for centuries through death, wars, pestilence.  The flesh perishes but paper lasts a pretty long time, and a fiction is timeless.  Give legal ownership of your property to the fiction but reserve the use of it to the living flesh.

This is not new.  Study trust law.

I am Chumbawamba.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:32 | 4483332 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:36 | 4483344 weburke
weburke's picture

The new ROME ! Dont fergit, despite its coldness, eastern canada has areas that are home to the ruling families as well.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 06:17 | 4483769 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Forget the bread and circuses......I want to introduce those aholes to the lions.


Now....that's entertainment.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:45 | 4483372 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

you are so right chumb (may i call you thus?).  not only that but the fact that the rich write the laws is so damn obvious.  the only kind of income that is taxed for social security recipients is earned income.  not dividends, not interest, not rents, not gifts, not inheritances, not capital gains.  just earnings from the sweat of one's brow.  

also please note that when someone dies, all the capital gains on that person's assets disappear.  the old cost/tax basis is gone and date of death value is substituted.

it was so funny when michael anthony on the old tv show the millionaire assured the recipients that all taxes had been paid, as if the recipient could have owed any. in the u.s. they have never had to pay dime one on gifts/inheritances.  

there is elaborate law to circumvent the estate tax owed by the giver of multimillion sums (has gotten higher over the years since ike was president) but it is pie to avoid any tax at all if the dying rich one is married and has less than ten million dollars of assets.  much much larger sums can be sheltered using life insurance, charitable donations, gifts under $10K per year per person (for decades), etc.  it's quite the racket.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 01:46 | 4483580 Never One Roach
Never One Roach's picture

You are confirming some of what the insurance agent down the block says which is super wealthy clients take multimillion dollar policies out on themselves as a way of passing theri wealth onward.

Racket sounds about right.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 22:30 | 4483151 asdasmos
asdasmos's picture



Very true


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:13 | 4483289 Stuck on Zero
Stuck on Zero's picture

USA.  Yes.  Now which part of the U.S. attracts the most international criminals?  Miami?  Beverly Hills?  New York?  Whitehouse? 


Thu, 02/27/2014 - 00:12 | 4483433 Kirk2NCC1701
Thu, 02/27/2014 - 07:08 | 4483786 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Send Saul, guns, and get me out of this.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:39 | 4481003 HoofHearted
HoofHearted's picture

So, on my list...

#1- Become a villainous dictator

#2- ??????

#3- Reap mass profits to hide in US banks

(Although I'd usually prefer to be my own central bank by holding gold in my own possession. Yes, I don't trust those villainous US banks.)

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:54 | 4481112 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Nope.  Bitcoin is the ultimate tax-haven.  Bar none.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:13 | 4481224 Occident Mortal
Occident Mortal's picture

Because the crippling losses are tax deductible?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:23 | 4481280 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture


Thu, 02/27/2014 - 06:47 | 4483778 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Yeah....that's gonna leave a mark.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:40 | 4481348 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Again, how is this "crippling" for someone who bought most BTC < $50?  What type of calculator are you using?  Or are you just stupid?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:52 | 4481417 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

Three bitcoins bought at less than $50 doesn't make one a millionaire, now.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:55 | 4481436 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Who has three Bitcoins?  If they do have three Bitcoins, that's a shitload of satoshis they're sitting on.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:58 | 4482396 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

Nobody.  Tain't real.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:25 | 4483318 Pickleton
Pickleton's picture

I assure you, taint is real!  I've seen it with my own eyes.  Sometimes I still <<shudder>>

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:41 | 4481708 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

Tax deductible and self destructible ..... This bit coin will self-destruct in 5..4..3..2..1....

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 17:08 | 4481896 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Bitcoin: untaxable and indestructable.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 21:05 | 4482842 mumbo_jumbo
mumbo_jumbo's picture

and i will glady accept your bitcoin as payment, of course at my approved exchange rate of $1 = 1 BTC.


Thu, 02/27/2014 - 06:51 | 4483780 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Bitcoin: untaxable


Comes with an army of 16000 IRS agents with no knock warrents......what the hell are you talking about?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:36 | 4483343 LapseOfReason
LapseOfReason's picture

"...If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it."
-The Ronald

Just keep telling yourself that, it will be our little secret

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 00:06 | 4483421 in4mayshun
in4mayshun's picture

Fonestar is becoming the little kid at the ball field no one wants to play with cause he sucks, but he just keeps showing up.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:30 | 4483329 LapseOfReason
LapseOfReason's picture


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:40 | 4481010 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Bonestar, biggest Goxsucker on ZH.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:53 | 4481109 fonestar
fonestar's picture

thow the fone a bitbone

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:01 | 4481143 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

Bitcoins are where Munney goes for laundry

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:08 | 4481167 fonestar
fonestar's picture

What's funny is to watch the ZH "opposition" try and come up with lame excuses as to why Bitcoin will flop.  Cannot remove their minds from the socio-economic-legal entrapment they were bred for.  Cannot fathom their "laws" becoming irrelevant artifacts.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:14 | 4481230 Vampyroteuthis ...
Vampyroteuthis infernalis's picture

What's funny is to watch the ZH "opposition" try and come up with lame excuses as to why Bitcoin will flop.

foner, it already has flopped. You are a day late and a dollar short.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:17 | 4481242 fonestar
fonestar's picture

How did it flop?  What is the price of Bitcoin today dipshit?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 17:29 | 4482024 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Tell me where the crowds are then moron?  Who has Bitcoins that you know?

Oh, nobody?  That's some mania!

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:04 | 4482172 dogbreath
dogbreath's picture


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:03 | 4482175 dogbreath
dogbreath's picture

I don't know any pimple faced, obese, tech nerds living in their mothers basement

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:11 | 4482210 fonestar
fonestar's picture

fonestar's PAL is a tech nerd but in pretty good shape, no acne.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:29 | 4482274 usednabused
usednabused's picture

Tulip Bulbs? Ha, actually the whole bitcoin thing reminds me more of beanie babies. The mentality thing you know. lol.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:48 | 4482355 fonestar
fonestar's picture

The whole Bitcoin thing reminds fonestar of a will to power.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 01:02 | 4483520 Spumoni
Spumoni's picture

I prefer the South Seas and Teapots, thank yo.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 22:37 | 4483160 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

"How did it flop?  What is the price of Bitcoin today dipshit?"

BTC/USD 64% drop in value from Dec '13 highs.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:23 | 4481281 pazmaker
pazmaker's picture

Hey fonestar, I've got around where I live selling bitcoin for $389. each  is that a fair price?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:33 | 4481323 fonestar
fonestar's picture

If you can buy for that sure.  Most sellers on still $550 - $650.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 22:13 | 4483099 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Only for the STAR'S though!

more like Made-Off right now?

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 07:08 | 4483787 Raging Debate
Raging Debate's picture

Fonestar - I dub thee King of Court Jesters. After all, a crown is a symbol of service. Your entertainment value to me is guessing if your also the Satoshi user and Fred Flinstone. If you'll say something intelligent or tell round eye joke some more. Seriously man, there are better ways to pimp BTC. Get a chill pill for the OCD/Bi-Polar.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 17:28 | 4482017 PoorMan429
PoorMan429's picture

I cant ask custermer to pay me in bitcoin. 

I cant buy breakfast at my local greasy spoon with bitcoins. 

I cant by a train ticket with a bitcoin. 

But i can speculate in a severely manipulated market with terrible liquidity, and high potential for being corzined in the process. 

What is the value of this thing? And how is it more obscure than a recordless cash, or PM transaction?

Do explain...

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 20:32 | 4482702 satoshi123
satoshi123's picture
Lawmaker seeks to ban Bitcoin in U.S. PCWorld  - ‎19 minutes ago‎ Bitcoin's wild volatility, and its ability to facilitate crimes such as money laundering, make it dangerous to Americans and it must be banned, U.S. ... Manchin (D) AIPAC occupied W. Virgina * Foney I know you say your in China or is that Canada? But already russia, china, and many others have banned bitcoin, now the AIPAC lobbyists are calling for BTC to be made illegal.
Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:56 | 4481115 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture


Why woiuld anyone bring money here to:

1. Pay full tax rates on cap gains

2. Pay full tax rates on dividends and interest 

3. Have extreme difficulty getting it back overeseas later

4. Be subjected to intrusive inquiry re it's provenance

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:50 | 4481414 dogbreath
dogbreath's picture

Noriega, Saddam, Pinochet, Erdogyan, and many more............all useful until they aren't.  Just Like BTC holders.    Now go back to sleep.


Edit:   The shah,  Marcos,  Diem,    Isn't Arafats young widow worth a billion(s)

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 17:12 | 4481925 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Yet another thread ruined by your friendly neighbourhood fonestar.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:36 | 4482298 Ceylon tea
Ceylon tea's picture

Please ban this putz, his contributions are bad and he should feel bad but he dont.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:43 | 4482329 fonestar
fonestar's picture

fonestar is one of the most enigmatic contributors on Zerohedge.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 19:18 | 4482460 dogbreath
dogbreath's picture

delusional maybe

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 07:22 | 4483790 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture


He's energetic...ya gotta give him that.


Cat could sell sand to an arab.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 19:55 | 4482588 fxrxexexdxoxmx
fxrxexexdxoxmx's picture

free Francis Sawyer and never ban fonestar

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 01:04 | 4483522 Spumoni
Spumoni's picture

You cannot ban Fonestar-he is annoying, enigmatic and fucking funny. 

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 07:13 | 4483791 Raging Debate
Raging Debate's picture

Foneatar - At some level we all externaiize our problems, your like the ZH emotional tampon to externalize on.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:31 | 4481636 Overfed
Overfed's picture

The US banking system is like a roach motel for $$.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:40 | 4481349 WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

LOL  +1K

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:16 | 4481236 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

Damn Fontas, you just never give up do you?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:47 | 4481395 fonestar
fonestar's picture



Bitcoin is the answer
And you know that for sure
Bitcoin is a flower
You gotta let it, you gotta let it grow

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:58 | 4481454 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

I like how up vote yourself.  Does your mum care when you're explaining how many posts you made on ZH, over dinner?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:00 | 4481463 fonestar
fonestar's picture

No but fonestar's boss is sure fucking pissed when he inspected the firewall logs.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 19:27 | 4482501 greenbear
greenbear's picture

Fonestar does not upvote his comments, I do.  I also gave you a thumbs down for good measure.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 00:38 | 4483477 salvadordaly
salvadordaly's picture

UUUUMMMM, I just cut all the power to your world. How many Bitcoins does that leave you? No computer, no internet. WHAT IS YOUR WORTH IN BITCOINS?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:17 | 4481238 RaceToTheBottom
RaceToTheBottom's picture

Doesn't your high school have a chat room or something?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:41 | 4481358 fonestar
fonestar's picture

fonestar does not do social engagement.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 07:19 | 4483795 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture




Does not work and play well with others.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:30 | 4481621 TheMeatTrapper
TheMeatTrapper's picture

My guess is that continously posting off topic bullshit in an attempt to disrupt conversation and attract attention to yourself will end up getting you banned. 

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 17:07 | 4481885 fonestar
fonestar's picture

This topic was about the greatest tax havens on Earth asswipe.  Bitcoin is the greatest tax haven.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 03:25 | 4483677 JustUsChickensHere
JustUsChickensHere's picture

I dont usually disagree with you fonestar, but just on a simple bit of maths, the amount of wealth hidden in the USA is a lot more that the amount hidden in Bitcoin - at present.

That ratio is likely to change over time ... so I guess it depends on what you mean by 'greatest'.

Bitcoin certainly has lower barriers to entry than the USA has when it comes to hiding money. No need for trusts, and lawyers etc.... just paper wallets or brain wallets - and some training for the next generation as you pass the wealth on.

Bitcoin is also impervious to jurisdiction issues and the ever changing legal traps that govt's create. 



Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:47 | 4482347 Prostar
Prostar's picture

Fonestar,  can you describe to me the difference between currency and money???  If you can then I'ld be willing to put you up in my basement.  I will give a little hint.  Ask yourself what is bitcoin backed with and what can you convert it into??

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 18:52 | 4482371 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Bits are money, everything else is bullshit.  You can convert one Bitcoin into one-hundred-million satoshi.  Bitcoin is backed by math.  If someone does not accept Bitcoin you can explain to them why they should.  If that doesn't work you use force or intimidation until they do volunteer.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 03:28 | 4483683 JustUsChickensHere
JustUsChickensHere's picture

I will answer that, because your hint at an answer is wrong.

Currency and money have identical attributes - except for one thing.  Money is trusted to store value down the years, currency is not.

Thats why FRN's (aside from being a wealth stripping ponzi) is Currency, and Gold/Silver is Money.

At present, that makes Bitcoin mostly a currency. Store of value? Unproven - but possible.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 06:18 | 4483750 Drifter
Drifter's picture

I'm afraid that's a pretty weak argument against bitcoin, the world reserve currency isn't redeemable (convertible) for anything and isn't backed by anything.

On the other hand real money (as declared by the Founders (and JP Morgan himself)) isn't redeemable (convertible) for anything and isn't backed by anything either.  It doesn't have to be.  It's real money with intrinsic value.

Bitcoins and FRNs are pretty much the same thing. Units of credit.  Tokens.  Points on a scoreboard.  Both are imaginary games, given that anything not real money is an imaginary game.

Our own Federal Reserve bank started the FRN imaginary game here in America.  Bitcoin merely copies it, with an independent scoreboard rather than a scoreboard maintained by a bank.  That's the only structural difference.

Of course bitcoin isn't a coin at all.  Just like a federal reserve note isn't a dollar.  Both are fake names used to create an impression in people's minds.

But that's all it takes these days.  Just make people believe it's real. 

The FRN game has force of law behind it intranationally and the biggest military in the world behind it internationally.  Use FRNs or we'll invade and occupy your country. 

The Bitcoin game has neither.  It's truly voluntary free market.

But yea, both are the very same thing conceptually.  Imaginary games.

Bitcoin is a multi-player computer game.  But USD is too.

In a larger sense the entire financial world is an imaginary game.  What is "shares of stock in a company"?  It's an imaginary game lots of people think is very real.

Bitcoin is just as valid as shares of stock in some company.  Both are stupid imaginary games.

You think bitcoin is imaginary but your stock shares are real?


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 19:53 | 4482584 fxrxexexdxoxmx
fxrxexexdxoxmx's picture

+1000 that was funny

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 01:00 | 4483517 Spumoni
Spumoni's picture

Hey- guesses are cheap! What was it at the peak? $1100.00 or so per guess? Sorry, FS-you are deluded. 




Thu, 02/27/2014 - 20:57 | 4487075 TheRedScourge
TheRedScourge's picture

Actually they do, unless they're a citizen of a country with no income tax. They don't pay any US taxes, due to tax treaties.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:26 | 4480923 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

And isn't going to give it back.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:30 | 4480944 swmnguy
swmnguy's picture

Can't give it back.  We've already re-hypothecated it a dozen times over, selling it 20 times to 40 people.  Or vice versa.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:42 | 4480985 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

And you know, since it is rehypothecated so many times, we don't really need to give it to anyone at all, do we? All of them can be equal bagholders. Just say it was vaporized/Corzined. Everyone understands that and no one prosecutes it.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:45 | 4481053 Freddie
Freddie's picture

London is a close second.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 17:08 | 4481893 janus
janus's picture

panama works if you REALLY need to hide.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:53 | 4481107 Sonic the porcupine
Sonic the porcupine's picture

I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:07 | 4481189 SilverDOG
SilverDOG's picture

Free to be sarcastic about proverbial freedom, which even such has become


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:10 | 4481522 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

"USA takes the gold!"  and keeps it.  Just ask Germany.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:33 | 4481654 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

...and stores it safely in Fort Gox, er, I mean Knox...

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:24 | 4480910 AKrandy
AKrandy's picture


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:54 | 4481114 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

I was going to say Chile, Simon.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:24 | 4480913 Boris Alatovkrap
Boris Alatovkrap's picture

No place is safe for average man.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:29 | 4480940 walküre
walküre's picture

And the world is your stage and hiding place when you're an oligarch. Except for those oligarchs who interfered with the money of the tribe.

Same as it ever was, Boris.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:51 | 4481089 0b1knob
0b1knob's picture

In Soviet Union, criminals run from government.

In Soviet America, criminals run the government.

Jackoff Smirnoff

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:53 | 4481100 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Boris and walkure, you guys are right.  For the average guys like us, or even the kind-of wealthy, I have seen zero safe places.

The oligarchs can feather their nests however.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:05 | 4481179 Frank N. Beans
Frank N. Beans's picture

even burying gold coins in tin cans in your backyard doesn't work -- when you get old and have alzheimer's you forget where you put it (you forget you even HAD it), and then somebody you don't even know finds it a hundred and fifty years later.  



Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:25 | 4481285 pazmaker
pazmaker's picture

Yep and then on top of that, they who found it are stupid enough to tell the whole world about it and have plastered all over the MSM!

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:48 | 4481399 zuuma
zuuma's picture

Teriffic Story!

Everyone's dream come true. I dropped my pants when I saw the pictures.

But... WHY? For the love of money, WHY did these stupid donkeys TELL ANYONE?

What's the first rule of Treasure Finders Club?



Wed, 02/26/2014 - 19:27 | 4482500 gonetogalt
gonetogalt's picture

Because they're getting way, way over spot based on numismatics & hype...

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 23:39 | 4483350 willwork4food
willwork4food's picture

I was working for a contractor a while ago that said one of their subs found $4000 while remodeling a forclosure....shitheads didn't share it either.

  Another story last year in a small town in S.C.:

An elderly lady had to have work done on her HVAC, the guys came and she asked them to look around for any place her deceased husband might have stached some cash and she would share some of it with them. They did the work and left, quit their HVAC jobs the NEXT DAY, bought lots of nice toys, wide-screen TV, jewelry, a car for their girlfriends all paid for with old $100 USD bills....IN A SMALL TOWN.

Now I know I'm not the brightest bulb in the chandellier, but really dogs?  The homeowner got word of old money floating around town and went to these guys to ask for the money back-they could keep their toys. They played dumb. She got an attorney, got them arrested for grand theft and sued the HVAC employer.

Look it up, I'm too lazy to do it for ya.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:01 | 4481471 falak pema
falak pema's picture

Rasputin was not average.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:25 | 4480920 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

There's so much illicit fiat in Miami area banks & their "wealth management" divisions, alone, that it's astounding.

Tony Montanas are alive & well, and they open the door for him.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:37 | 4480983 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

Tell me about it? I live in S. Dade.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:47 | 4481060 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

I own rental properties in Coconut Grove & Bay Point (and Boca, way away) . How close are you?

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:54 | 4481111 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

Very. I live in the last beacon of Freedom & Liberty. One of the last unincorporated Towns in Amerika. The Springs.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:06 | 4481154 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

I will be in town 1st or 2nd week of March.

I am getting unsolicited offers to purchase my string of properties from institutional money hired brokers 8x per month; there's a ton of Israelis, South Americans, Brits, Russian & Dutch buyers (using OPM) back in play, reflating the bubble again, just like in 2005 to 2007 (peak insanity).

The difference this time is IT'S 100% speculative buying, versus 85%. The last wash outs let their properties be foreclosed on (Broken Brickell Avenue) because they didn't want to or could 't pay the prop taxes/HOA fees, even on brand new developments.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:32 | 4481297 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

That's a diverse set of buyers. The usual suspects you see vacationing & renting during the winter season down here. It's a huge Ponzi scheme & a huge fragil house of cards which is set to collapse at any time. TPTB can only move the debt from country to country for so long while simultaneously devaluing currencies via printing.

However, hard assets PM's, real estate (Location) art, classic auto's, Firearms & anything collectible that has value will always hold & increase in wealth.

Those are great "Locations." Boca too, even though its far as hell. Perhaps it's not worth the trip. A 1965 Mustang GT Fastback specifically a Carol Shelby model will always hold its weight in Gold.

Or you can't go wrong by having one of the finest 1911 Firearms manufactured by Les Baer or Night Hawk.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:44 | 4481370 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

I've turned every fiat of profit into storehouses of real value, with minimal carrying costs.

I'm one of the few people I know or genuinely believes we already entered the 2nd Great Depression, and that its effects have merely been hidden from view via massive fiat printing & bailouts, not just in the U.S., but globally, since 2008.

My only contrarian view, and it's quite contentious with more than a few people, is that the USD will be in scarce supply for a good while, especially when the 2nd wave of credit lent out (between 2009 and now) starts to turn bad (which is happening as I type this, and is already underway), and I maintained that position before it was brought to light as to how many Yuan the PBoC or other emerging market actors have printed to try and float their massive bad debt (spoiling further by the day).

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:51 | 4481416 centerline
centerline's picture

Not at all contrarian from my perspective.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:11 | 4481524 Apostate2
Apostate2's picture

I agree also. Just wait when the Fed raises rates (UK is on the same timeline) then the tsunami will hit the yuan and the property bubble will pop big-time. Hence the gold buying spree. 

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:02 | 4481472 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

"I'm one of the few people I know or genuinely believes we already entered the 2nd Great Depression,"

You're not alone. I've been in that mindset & timeframe as well. Problem is we're realists living in a warped, Orwellian time. The second will not be a wave as much as a tsunami of wealth destruction. Add in an even more powerful Militarized Police State & what we have is & will be a surveillance controlled economy with an Espionage type business model. Exactly what we have now but to the 100th degree.

The Global Criminal Oligarch Cabal Bankster Intelligence Crime Syndicate are going "all in." And, nothing will stop them from their plan of Total Complete Full Spectrum World Domination. So they think.

In the end, choose Peaceful Non-Compliance, Non-Participation in their Global System of Debt Bondage & Enslavement. That & a .45acp 1911.


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:46 | 4481383 Tinky
Tinky's picture

Actually, the curb weight of a '65 Shelby GT is 44,480oz, worth about $60m at todays gold price. So, not quite, though I take your broader point.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:55 | 4481403 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

We agree on a much. I do think classic and exotic cars are in another bubble, just like every asset class that's floated by cheap fiat (art [Franic Bacon's  “Portrait of George Dyer Talking,” ; ], wine, RE, stocks, etc.) tends to be, during times like these.

But I am extremely bearish on the global economy and believe all the CBs in all of the lands won't be able to keep risk asset markups together again.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:00 | 4481465 Tinky
Tinky's picture

I was (pedantically) responding to Chupacabra. No doubt that many collectible asset classes are in bubbles, however, over time, the very best and most import cars (watches, paintings, etc.) will appreciate, and for fairly obvious reasons.

Barring a true Mad Max scenario, there will always be wealthy people seeking to own things that are both superb and unique (or nearly so).

I also share your bearish view completely, and am planning accordingly.

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 01:50 | 4483585 natty light
natty light's picture

I think this whenever I see Barret-Jackson auctions on Speed.

Also, I remember during the housing bubble the "car condos:" condos for your car.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:39 | 4481341 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Make sure you get top dollar.  I remember many years ago that the Babylon Club in Scarface was supposed to be a composite of a club in Coconut Grove.

The interiors were shot in LA at Paramount but the exteriors were at a restaurant in West Fort Lauderdale.

Real estate back then in CG was really pricey.  I bet per sq ft it is way up there today.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:00 | 4481144 Freddie
Freddie's picture

The middle to northern area of Miami Beach is all Russian mafia and oligarch money plus other low lifes.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:34 | 4481325 Ignatius
Ignatius's picture

You forgot to mention the girls.  Lots of pretty women.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:51 | 4481075 Levadiakos
Levadiakos's picture

The obvious elephant in the room is getting the dough back out again

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:57 | 4481220 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Yep. When I didn't sell EVERYTHING in 2006 I was frustrated, but I had already cashed out many times over my initial investment. This time, I'm liquidating everything while Bernanke's bubble has allowed me to do so again at a fat profit. It's all an elaborate fiat bubble driven ruse. There are many South Americans who want to retire/live in Miami, in the most exclusive areas, but that demand has nearly been filled with what has already been sold, and there are TENS OF THOUSANDS of new units built in 2005 to 2008 that haven't even been finished and/or marketed yet, that the banks are sitting on still.


Whether dot.coms or real estate, SHORT TERM MEMORY (or playing with OPM) prevails in a fractional fiat fraudconomy, and instutional money (e.g. CALpers) is the DUMBEST MONEY OF ALL:


Mobile home or million-dollar profit? -

to this (how would like to have been the SUCKER to cash those trailer park millionaires out?)

A $510 million trailer park cashes out - CNN Money
Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:25 | 4480922 headhunt
headhunt's picture

Once again - do as I say and not as 'we' do...

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:25 | 4480924 ConfederateH
ConfederateH's picture

You forgot to mention FATCA IGA reciprocity.  Barry, Valerie and Eric are subhuman mongrels, and as such they don't think the white man's laws apply to them.  For this reason they are forcing Canada, Switzerland and the entire western world to provide them with the names of US tax realists while refusing to provide any information on any drug dealers, money launderers or mass murderers hiding money in the US.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:27 | 4480933 NEOSERF
NEOSERF's picture

Or you can bury gold in your backyard...just remember to write it down somewhere so that when dementia hits you are covered.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:30 | 4480948 Abitdodgie
Abitdodgie's picture

How do you remember where you wote it down , what am I doing hear , ho look puppys

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:23 | 4481278 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

If by puppies you meant pets and by pets you meant cats and by cats you meant pussy-well then I'm pickin' up what you're layin' down.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:08 | 4481513 ebear
ebear's picture

Fridge magnet

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 00:35 | 4483472 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

[rolls eyes] You leave the info in a sealed envelope and make it part of your Will, and kept in your lawyer's safe. Really obvious.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:35 | 4481328 vulcanraven
vulcanraven's picture


Don't wind up like the guy who buried these:

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:31 | 4480939 Cursive
Cursive's picture

I could go along with these assessment as long if it were combined with the James Quinn's "Do No Evil Google" post yesterday.  As long as an individual, good or bad, is ensconced in the "Inner Party" hierarchy (a/k/a an "nomenclatura", then that individual is OK.  Fall out of the Inner Party, and look out....

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:30 | 4480943 world_debt_slave
world_debt_slave's picture

If you're main street joe you can't deposit over $10k without flagging the IRS

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:36 | 4480971 headhunt
headhunt's picture

actually it is any amount that looks 'suspicious'... make sure you show you democrat voter ID card and all is good

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:47 | 4481069 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

I know someone who writes fraud/ money laundering monitoring software for major banks. 10k is so yesterday. Transactions in the few hundreds of dollars are categorized and analyzed for potential fraud trends. I was shocked at the complexity of the analytics they employ. Keeping money in a bank even for small daily transactions is not safe anymore. I am rethinking my strategy after being enlightened how things are done now.


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:56 | 4481122 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Very interesting, thank you Miffed!  Bank of Sealy and Bank of Physical Gold immediately come to mind as alternatives.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:58 | 4481134 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

What pisses me off is all of the effort that the bank tellers use to pump you for information.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:03 | 4481162 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

This is part of it. They need that to start and it is cross checked with several pieces of information. He described the algorithms to me and how they work. I was absolutely dumbfounded. I had never known about Big Data analytics. Guys, we are living in the end of times for any financial and physical freedoms. Be careful, be wary and be wise.


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 22:35 | 4483165 ImReady
ImReady's picture

You must bank at shittybank. They drive me crazy. "How's business?" "None of your business bitch!"

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 16:11 | 4481501 Radical Marijuana
Radical Marijuana's picture

Indeed, MM, "money laundering monitoring software for major banks" was deliberately designed to have backdoors for them to more successfully launder the money that they want to launder. The laws against money laundering tend to only be actually applied to small players, as a symbolic show, when those smaller players are not playing ball within the bigger players' systems sufficiently, as far as the big players are concerned. We DO live in a Bizarro Mirror World, on every level, the deeper one looks into that. Therefore, OF COURSE, alleged anti-money-laundering software actually facilitates more money laundering, since that anti-money-laundering software is an integrated component in the overall globalized electronic fiat money fraud system. WE are all stuck inside of those vicious spirals, which are automatically getting worse, faster, with no end in sight regarding how bad that is going to get!

The obvious truisms are the illegal drugs are the biggest cash cows of organized crime, with marijuana being the biggest within that context. Some drugs are illegal so that they make more money, and that money will end up in banks. The banks control the government in order to benefit the banks. There are usually overlapping confluences of interests whereby the banksters tell their puppet politicians which lies to legalize, and back up with legalized violence, so that the banksters and their buddies will become ever more wealthy and powerful, and even more able to continue to control their puppet politicians.

Meanwhile, the masses of muppets are conditioned to believe in the bullshit stories regarding what is happening. One of the ways that happens is that people merely regard these phenomena as being egregious hypocrisy, because they still believe in the impossible ideals about what should happen instead, despite that, in the real world, those impossible ideals always make the opposite happen!

Simon Black is one of those authors who are Black Sheep, or reactionary revolutionaries, who present good analysis, except always conclude by collapsing back to the same old false fundamental dichotomies whenever proposing "solutions." IF we were ever going to actually become more scientific about these situations, then we would have to start thinking through unitary mechanisms, rather than false fundamental dichotomies, in order to understand how the financial systems became fundamentally fraudulent, and within that context, the anti-money-laundering programs actually facilitate more money laundering.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:31 | 4480949 NuYawkFrankie
NuYawkFrankie's picture

They don't call it The United States Of Bald-Faced Hypocrisy for nothin'.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:33 | 4480951 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

 the Financial Crimes Enforcement Network (FinCEN), an agency of the US Treasury Department, sent out a rather frantic email blast to banks across the United States yesterday about former Ukrainian President Viktor Yanukovych.

Why do we trust these assertions of Simon Black? How does he know this? 

Edit, I found it

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:31 | 4480953 Rip van Wrinkle
Rip van Wrinkle's picture

London makes the US look like amateurs. The London property market is the world's laundry basket....when HSBC can't oblige, of course.

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 15:58 | 4481455 Apostate2
Apostate2's picture

Just more expensive. To get a residents visa you need a million pounds (only a small percentage can be in property, the rest in gilts). That's going to change now to 2.5 million pounds auctioned off so that, according to the Home Office, 'taxpayers get a better deal'.

(need I say lol)


Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:32 | 4480955 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

      Amerika!  You can check in but you can't check out, without greasing Uncle Sam's rosy red palms!

Wed, 02/26/2014 - 14:32 | 4480956 youngman
youngman's picture

I would bet you could find 50 banks in Florida that would be willing to help you ..for a percentage of course

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