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As Russian Troops In The Ukraine Hit 16,000, US Department Of Defense Orders Them To Go Home

Tyler Durden's picture


While it has gotten to the point where the propaganda is so bad on both sides of the Ukraine crisis, that any numbers thrown about are ridiculous, made up gibberish more fabricated than anything the Chinese Department of Truth or US Bureau of Labor can possibly goalseek, it is worth pointing out that according to AP, Ukraine's ambassador to the UN said 16,000 Russian troops are now deployed in the Ukraine. This was "revealed" at the third emergency Security Council session meeting in the last four days, shortly after Ukraine's fugitive president requested Russian soldiers in the strategic Crimea region "to establish legitimacy, peace, law and order," Russia's U.N. ambassador said Monday, contradicting the president's own comments last week.

However, while Russian hypocrisy is to be expected - after all they are the "Evil Empire" to quote a famous actor and president - it is the humor from the self-appointed moral watchdog of all the world's evils, the US, that was the highlight of today's UN session:

 U.S. Ambassador Samantha Power dismissed Moscow's contention that it intervened militarily in Crimea to protect the human rights of Russian civilians there as "baseless," insisting there is no evidence of any threats against ethnic Russians in Ukraine.


"One might think that Moscow has just become the rapid response arm of the High Commissioner for Human Rights," she told the council. "Russian military action is not a human rights protection mission."

Speaking of high commissioners for human rights, at least Russia never invaded a country using made up WMDs as pretext, and did not almost launch World War III to satisfy a nat gas-rich ally over a fabricated YouTube clip. Oh, and all that "innocent civilian casualty" drone stuff too.

So what does the world's most irrelevant organization do? They send in monitors:


Well, monitors did miracles during the Yugoslav war, maybe they will "work" this time too.

But the piece de resistance, regardless if the real number of Russian troops in the Ukraine is 1,000 or 100,000, was the following:


Wait, so the US Department of Defense, that of the United States if it was somehow unclear, suddenly has authority to control the troops... of Russia?

One wonders: did the US Department of Education tell Gazprom to maintain gas supplies to Germany no matter how many CIA agents are operating in Kiev?

Or did ACORN tell whoever is the current pre-countercoup Ukraine president to hike minimum wages?

Or maybe the Department of Justice is quietly trying to collect its Fedex guns sent "erroneously" to Ukraine mercenaries, having confused them with Mexican drug lords?

Whatever the confusion, we are confident that following this latest "escalation" in the US response narrative, that Russia will promptly CTRL-Z everything it has done in the Ukraine in the past two weeks, and say it was only kidding.

* * *

Tangentially, while it has been made abundantly clear just how terrified Russia is of NATO, of Europe and of the US, for an indication of what China thinks of the latter, the WSJ reports the following:

The departing U.S. ambassador to China, Gary Locke inspired mixed reactions during his two-and-a-half-year tenure. Though his unpretentious manner was widely praised, as the first American of Chinese descent to hold the job, criticism of him had a special bite... The state-run China News Service... published a derisive editorial late last week (in Chinese) that described Mr. Locke as “a banana, with yellow skin and a white heart.”

Because when America respects itself and its symbolic headpiece, the president, so very much how can the rest of the world not follow?


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Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:04 | 4504681 Truther
Truther's picture

The US fuckers never learn, do they... Till it hits hard right in the balls.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:14 | 4504726 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

U.S.Department of Defense orders Russian Troops to withdraw or else U.S. Military will do this again-

- Gay and lesbian troops perform in drag on American military base -

Troops based at the Kadena Air Base in Japan know how to party. On Saturday, six gay and straight service members applied some of their finest makeup and lip synced to "I Wanna Dance with Somebody" in what is believed to be first drag queen and king show on an American military base. The show was thrown in support for the base's recently formed OutServe-SLDN chapter, a nonprofit advocacy group for the army's LGBT community.

Navy Lt. Marissa Greene told Stars and Stripes she only expected to sell 75 tickets for the variety show, but ended up selling more than 400 in ten days. The event went through the same approval process as other on-base fundraisers go through, with the only caveat being that it was not allowed to be labeled a "drag show" in its publicity materials. The show was warmly received by spectators, who rocked out to performances by the likes of Manny Nuff and Chocolate Sunrise ("a crowd favorite," the website notes.)

Just a few years ago, performances like these would have been grounds for a possible discharge. The repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell has made it possible for events like this to occur. --Jordan Valiantly

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:19 | 4504754 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

Who cares anymore, Let them do whatever they want. This country is going to shit and they don't have much to look forward to anyway.

""There's probably a tidal wave of suicides coming," says Brian Kinsella, an Iraq war veteran who started Stop Soldier Suicide, a nonprofit group that works to raise awareness of suicide."

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:27 | 4504776 WayBehind
WayBehind's picture

I'm sure they will obey the order to go home. Hahaha what a joke! And Putin has a message for the US Department Of Defense "Go fuck yourself!"

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:44 | 4504890 ACP
ACP's picture

Or better yet, "Fuck a goat!"

I'm sure that's next on tap anyway.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:49 | 4504916 Richard Chesler
Richard Chesler's picture

Offer them Obamacare!


Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:01 | 4504966 linniepar
linniepar's picture

Control-z, stop. Control-p, print. Control-c, break!

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:15 | 4505035 Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

How about we go full Carter - let's boycott the olympics!

(Never go full Carter.)

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:30 | 4505078 Captain Kink
Captain Kink's picture

LOL +1

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:00 | 4505186 Bill the Cat
Bill the Cat's picture


Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:12 | 4505208 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

Isn't the Royal Australian Navy's motto "Never leave your mates behind"?

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:23 | 4505232 zerozulu
zerozulu's picture

Obama is taking this situation very seriously, he yelled at all interns.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:08 | 4505312 MagicHandPuppet
MagicHandPuppet's picture

O'bambam just needs to go to that special place where they keep Lil' Bush and get him to use his super power of "seeing into Putin's sole" to find out just WTF is going on over there!

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 06:05 | 4505788 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture



Emperor Chuck Hagel......stand down bitchez!


Tap this thing on?

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 07:23 | 4505860 negative rates
negative rates's picture

We need a mic check here, I think it's the amp not plugged in.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:20 | 4505047 jimmytorpedo
jimmytorpedo's picture

I just got an executive order to come to bed.

Fortunately, my wife is better looking than any politician.

Although she does keep smiling when she fucks me,...

Maybe she is from the government?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:41 | 4505116 scrappy
scrappy's picture

Great plan!

No 3 am calls for this Exec!



Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:02 | 4505302 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

You are setting yourself up for some prime Boris here. These threads are prime Boris magnet. Where he is!

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 04:47 | 4505707 BringOnTheAsteroid
BringOnTheAsteroid's picture

He's been subscripted by Putin, where else.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:27 | 4505068 Independent
Independent's picture

The Russian troops are home, they are in Crimea

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:36 | 4505101 Wahooo
Wahooo's picture

If nothing else comes of this, I hope our banking system is destroyed.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:05 | 4505308 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Zion is just another system of control. We need to balance the equation.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 02:13 | 4505495 TheRideNeverEnds
TheRideNeverEnds's picture

That is not going to happen, just buy the dip we will be making new highs by Wednesday. 

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:28 | 4505070 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Just when I thought it could not get more ridiculous, it went to the sublime.

If somebody told me this even a year ago, I would've told them they were wearing their tinfoil hat too long. Now, given that truth is stranger than fiction or conspiracy, I am inclined to take my 'hat' off to the Conspiracy Theory cum Conspiracy Fact crowd.

Bones, where is my tinfoil hat!?
And Scotty, you sandbagger you, how are the repairs on the photon torpedoes coming along?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:33 | 4505093 Captain Kink
Captain Kink's picture

Read "The Next 100 Years", by Friedman. or Freidman...

Captain to Captain, it is a worthwhile read.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:27 | 4505238 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

I always thought you were the same person. Now I'm confused

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:11 | 4505319 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

He has an altered ego, and an alternate too.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 04:08 | 4505675 matrix2012
matrix2012's picture

"The Next 100 Years; A Forecast for the 21st Century" by Dr. George Friedman, both pdf and audiobook are available for dl at KAT

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:55 | 4505169 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

Mine is made of silverfoil, I hammered it out of a single SAE.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 05:02 | 4505727 ebear
ebear's picture

I hate to break it to you guys, but tinfoil actually concentrates the mind control rays.  

I mean, seriously, how do you think those people got so weird?

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:17 | 4505221 astitchintime
astitchintime's picture

Kirk, my sentiments exactly.

Scotty, beam me up, there are no intelligent life forms here!

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:10 | 4505316 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Well Kirk, Sarah Palin told you in 2000 fricken EIGHT that Putin would probably invade Ukraine given senator obama's statements and actions, IF Obama was elected. How's that for strange!

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:39 | 4505385 jez
jez's picture

Picture the scene, as Russian troops drop their weapons and wander off in an easterly direction.


"Oi you," shouts an officer. "Where the fuck d'you think you're going?"


"Sorry to say goodbye, captain,' says one of the passing troops, "but you see, the thing is, there is a higher authority involved. The United States Department of Defense has "called on" us to return to our bases. So that's where we are going. I'm sure you understand."


Just imagine -- that exact scene is being played out at various locations across Crimea AT THIS VERY MOMENT.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:24 | 4504778 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

101st Fuck Each Other In The Ass Division

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 04:24 | 4505684 Zero Point
Zero Point's picture

There's a reason those eagles scream.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:28 | 4504799 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

Because we are not allowed to care.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:28 | 4504802 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

I once had a Vietnam vet pour his heart out to me. High school football star, went off to war. Came back and the VA offered him a choice of drugs. Many more drugs and a two day PCP coma, extreme homelessness, and twelve DUIs later, he was chatting with me at a local picnic area in the hills. He was screaming "I FUCKED UP! I FUCKED UP!" to me one point in the conversation. bigPharm can fuck you up worse than any war.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:30 | 4504813 TungstenBars
TungstenBars's picture

I blame the US military for that one. They think of their soldiers as slaves until eventually as liabilities. 

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:47 | 4504872 Bonapartist
Bonapartist's picture

The best way to use the military to your own gains is to never get sent to overseas combat but end up with some bullshit "disability" discharge like one of my neighbors after about 12 years served in the Air Force after attending the AF Academy- he gets a fucking awesome pension, insurance for his family, even a handicapped parking pass( he thinks that is hilarious)and the fucker does all kind of strenuous physical activities w/ no problem. He owns a "disabled vet contracting company" and gets a shitload of VA business steered his way.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:14 | 4505025 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture

Huntington Beach CA???

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:29 | 4505067 Bonapartist
Bonapartist's picture

SW Chi-town burbs. He just bought himself the ultimate douchemobile- a $50K Ford Raptor.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:45 | 4505129 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Jesus dude, he pulled a sweet lifelong scam and he gets a fucking Raptor? Better than an Escalade, I suppose. My friend and I deduced that it costs $2000 a year to maintain an Escalade, getting worse after five years.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:59 | 4505173 Bonapartist
Bonapartist's picture

12000 miles a year= $3500 in gas alone.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:16 | 4505217 Skateboarder
Skateboarder's picture

Gas is a sunk cost. I'm talking about 2k/yr in maintenance to keep the thing running everyday.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:14 | 4505328 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

And the lifelong shame and karmic disaster of having fed the UAW.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:00 | 4504956 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

"Your country loves you.  Thanks for putting your body and soul through the grist mill for the MIC.

Have a nice day, and remember to gesticulate when you pass a Boeing, Raytheon, or Chase Manhattan Bank"

Yeah, like that.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:15 | 4505034 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Grist for the Mill, Bitchez!

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:09 | 4505204 piceridu
piceridu's picture

Let's just keep making "war is honorable propaganda films". How many young souls need to many young souls need to get their arms and legs blown off before they realize they've been played?

How many children of rich familes or politicians die or are mamed for their flag? Being mamed or killed is a monopoly held by poor and middle class kids. Let's not blame the drugs administered by the VA for a soldier or vet to want to kill himself...just ask Smedley Butler, he'll tell you why.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 07:26 | 4505862 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Old people have always sent the youth off to war for their own purposes.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:28 | 4505071 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

I wonder how the troops that abided by their oath, though not easy, and refused to go are doing?!

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:05 | 4505199 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture


My take on those soldiers who commit suicide is that they are the ones most likely to have a conscience. Sad.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 06:20 | 4505807 silvermail
silvermail's picture

Putin's adviser on economics Sergei Glazyev said :
- Russia will abandon the dollar.
- And also Russia will create its currency system , together with China and other countries.
- And also Russia will abandon all public U.S. Treasuries.
- And also Russia will refuse to return any U.S. loans .
- And also Russia will arrest all assets of the United States and the West.
- And also Russian will stop all Russian oil and gas supplies to Europe. Oil and gas from Russia will go to China.
- And also Russia already has banned the import of meat from the United States.

Goodbye dollar, hello gold. Goodbye to the United States and the West, hello China and East.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:31 | 4504759 Yes We Can. But...
Yes We Can. But Lets Not.'s picture

Attenzion.  Attenzion. 

Zis is America speaking.  Remember us?  Does Shock & Awe ring a bell, mein friends?  How about the names Clinton, Rice, Kerry, Obama?  MmmHmm.  Thought so.

So.  Return to your bases, immediately.  Repeat, return to zee base immediately, und no one gets hurt.

Attenzion.  Attenzion.....

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:59 | 4505184 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

Shouldn't you be using a Yiddish accent here?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:25 | 4504784 fijisailor
fijisailor's picture

Anything to entertain the young confused kids before they're sent out to die for fuckall.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:36 | 4504840 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

This is crazy, Russia knows we won't do anything.



Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:04 | 4504981 flapdoodle
flapdoodle's picture

"accidental" false flag which triggers the reset on three, two, one...

Thus Barack Obama completes the mission of "fool who started WWIII" for which he was contracted, and which is going exactly as planned.

TSA, FEMA camps, and executive orders all make perfect sense if viewed from this perspective.

Be afraid, very afraid.



Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:30 | 4505079 Bonapartist
Bonapartist's picture

They don't have the balls for the big one- this is just a pissing contest.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:28 | 4505243 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

"TSA, FEMA camps, and executive orders all make perfect sense if viewed from this perspective."

There won't be a need for any of those if there is an all
out nuclear war.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:46 | 4505414 SDShack
SDShack's picture

False flag to launch WWIII, or civil war in US to unleash DHS, CIA, NSA, FEMA, etc, is unlikely unless things get much much worse then they are now. Plus one other fact. If the plan is to make 0zer0 the fall guy, then you must have the Strongman ready to take 0zer0's place when you launch the NWO. There is no Strongman on the next 1-2 year horizon, so they can't be ready to launch the plan. PS - Hillary aint the Strongman.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 03:12 | 4505617 cynicalskeptic
cynicalskeptic's picture

Palin's willing to step in - was handpicked by a bunch of neo-cons.......

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 08:54 | 4506055 Vendetta
Vendetta's picture

You Betcha'

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:14 | 4504728 max2205
max2205's picture

Very good sarcastic article...funny

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:19 | 4504756 bania
bania's picture

Maybe if they ask pretty please

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:28 | 4504805 WOAR
Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:17 | 4504746 Pheonyte
Pheonyte's picture


Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:37 | 4504848 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Romani ite domum.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:58 | 4504850 Equality72521
Equality72521's picture

What's this, then? "Romanes eunt domus"? People called Romanes, they go, the house?

Edit --- Not Python fans aye?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:58 | 4505180 object_orient
object_orient's picture

All your bases are belong to US

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:33 | 4504828 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

The US fuckers never learn, do they... Till it hits hard right in the balls.

Yup. Just like the Europeans. 

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:16 | 4505332 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Europeans have balls?

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 08:00 | 4505912 CuttingEdge
CuttingEdge's picture

The collective testicular potential of the EU political class equates to about 3 pubes on Putin's scrotum. Adding that dumb fuck in the White House increases this to 4 (at a pinch).



Tue, 03/04/2014 - 02:16 | 4505503 Independent
Independent's picture

What I am confused you mean Cossack Ivan was GI Joe all along?

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 04:39 | 4505699 eddiebe
eddiebe's picture

Well, in the wallet, actually.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:19 | 4504690 nightshiftsucks
nightshiftsucks's picture

The DOD through the NSA knows that the S400 is pure bullshit,I read it on the internet so it must be true. On another note I read that the IMF said the US economy is speeding up so it must be true.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:47 | 4505279 edotabin
edotabin's picture

Yes, the decline in the economy is accelerating :-)

I don't know, they may be able to pull one last hat out of their ass by virtually destroying the currency etc.  If they manage to do so, the next cycle will absolutely be the end unless humanity makes some major leap forward (ie: internet in the 90s). There will be nothing left.

In order for people to have jobs, they have to destroy the currency. If they maintain the integrity of the currency, people are destroyed. 

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:08 | 4504691 devo
devo's picture

Someone has to pay for the sequester. Looks like it's going to be Drago.

Ps. Dear rest of the world: I am sorry for our behavior.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:35 | 4504836 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

Ps. Dear rest of the world: I am sorry for our behavior.

Oh stop. I don't anyone else ever apologizing to America. 

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:07 | 4504693 pot_and_kettle
pot_and_kettle's picture

A well placed sickle in the taint always does the trick

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:07 | 4504696 Rakshas
Rakshas's picture

I tried telling Rumsfuck to leave Iraq alone too...... shit didn't work......

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:58 | 4504941 Ness.
Ness.'s picture

One good thing came out of Iraq. Chicago is no longer the most dangerous place on the planet anymore.  WooHoo!!



Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:11 | 4504699 agent default
agent default's picture

US and EU running around like headless chickens.  Because nobody could have seen this coming.  Nobody. 

Now we have full metal panic mode, ordering another military what to do.  They CANNOT be that stupid.  I refuse to believe that these people are in charge of anything.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:51 | 4504918 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Maybe the DoD and Pentagon should hold another gay dance party.  Putin and the Russians just laugh.

I had a neighbor who had military recruiters trying to enlist his kid.  He pulled up when they came to his house.  He told them to stay away from his kid and that he was going in the house for his gun and if they were still there he would use it.

American parents who allow their children to join the usurper's military are guilty of child abuse.   I had a relative and told them and their kid that they would be out of their minds to join O's military.   The kid got a job and worked his way through college in 3 years and started a business.

The F-35 is junk.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:49 | 4505283 Canucklehead
Canucklehead's picture

The only reason the DOD put out that press release about Russian forces returning to their bases was that Mylie Cyrus asked them to do it.  In return she promised to play their next drag party.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:08 | 4504702 laomei
laomei's picture

I really wonder what it's like living in the west right now.  I'm seeing a constant barrage of media propaganda leaking through, and that's annoying enough as it is.  Can't even imagine how fucked it must be to be inside of that echo-chamber of bullshit.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:10 | 4504712 licutis
licutis's picture

as opposed to the echo chamber of bullshit that passes for news in the country of your avatar? 

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 02:07 | 4505484 laomei
laomei's picture

Here's the difference: In China, sure, media is tightly controlled and virtually all of it is state owned.  However, being that there is a clear line that is set on issues, journalists generally try to dance on that line.  Everyone knows this is the case.  There might be some spin on issues, and issues may be ignored, but they don't just make shit up and lie, as lies are easily countered.  Even moreso as the US would *love* to degrade Party legitimacy by touting those lies.  There's also a variety of news.  If some spin is just so absurd that an editor would be choking on his own vomit to spew it, the issue is just ignored.  You see this happen where a story is run in one paper and not in any of the others.  The talking heads tend to be neutral on mostly everything international, as the focus for spin is mainly domestic.  Most are quite distrustful of the news, but it's still useful to gain insight on government stances.


In the US: It's all corporate-controlled and the tiny bit which is not, is an absolute joke.  It's all about profit, and the best way to ensure profit is to parrot the US government line and be nothing more than a mouthpiece.  They all buy into it hook line and sinker, as going against the grain is a great way to be barred from access and picked apart to destroy a career.  The talking heads put a spin on everything.  The best, closest thing to a legitimate news source in the US is the fucking daily show, a comedy show, and even then, when it's time to fire up the yellow press, they fall right in line as viacom calls the shots.  Idiots actually believe it all, hook line and sinker.  Regardless of the channel, the message is all the same, just a mild variance on the spectrum.  Did you care to notice all the hit pieces on Putin leading up to this? Quite a bit of it wholecloth manifestations or excessive spin.  Gotta have a "bad guy" here obviously.  Crying about "gay rights" in Russia, and not bothering to see what actual Russians thought of it, when the only ban was on being in everyone's faces about in who and where you park your dick at night... keeping that away from kids.  The HORROR.  Gotta have a bad guy or make one up.


For China, I'm going to flat out ignore anything pre-1980, as that was a significant year in terms of national change.  Since then, how many wars has China started? How many countries has it invaded? How many times has it directly or indirectly threatened others with nuclear holocaust?  How many times has it slapped crippling sanctions on another nation to meet political goals?  None, not even once.  The propaganda in China might rile up the masses to protest Japan or the US now and again, but that's it.

For the US, it's probably easier to count the cases where they *didn't* do such thing, and with the media gleefully locked in goose-step the entire time to lie over and over again that it is "moral" or "just" or "right".  Yellow sackless mouthpiece limpwristed media afraid to have any opinion on anything that matters apart from the one their government minders spell out for them.  So many flat out LIES, and never bothering to correct them.  You have an entire brigade of "journalists" and talking heads who will root for war in all cases, I mean, afterall, it allows them to continue having access and it enriches their MIC masters of course.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 06:58 | 4505838 GCT
GCT's picture

+100 Lao!

Most Americans do not even knw where the Ukraine is located in the world map!  I would make a stab at stateing most Americans would not know the difference if you switched Russia and China on a world globe.  We are too busy teaching ourchildren how to raise their children at 13 and English as a second language.  You must learn how to use social media and a smart phone.  The remain classes these days are all about social issues and how our government is there to take care of you.

Journalism is a joke to be honest.  I check the weather and turn news off.  Depending on what channel you turn too it is nothing more then a political view handed to the anchor by his or her masters.  You are now hired based on your political views and looks.  If you deviate from the channels agenda your out the door.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 07:39 | 4505884 A82EBA
A82EBA's picture


Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:10 | 4504713 Van Halen
Van Halen's picture

Media in the West is generally: Obama is soooo dreamy! And Michelle - those toned arms! Sigh.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:32 | 4504815 Ness.
Ness.'s picture

Nobody with a username Van Halen (78-82) should EVER end a post with 'sigh'.  You should be ashamed of yourself. 

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:45 | 4505136 Captain Kink
Captain Kink's picture

I think he was pseudo quoting the imaginary media fawning oer the admin like it wa camelot all over again.... 

And i find Michelle and her arms incredibly unappealling...  kind of revolting, even...  wait, should I not have written that?  Why is there a black suburban pulling up ou


Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:21 | 4504761 TungstenBars
TungstenBars's picture

The propaganda here would make Goebbels blush. 

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:39 | 4504859 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Goebbels brought to you by Edward Bernays, an American.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:11 | 4505202 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

And way outdone by Ilya Ehrenberg, like Bernays yet another Jew. He was Stalin's propagandist and one extremely sick fuck. Gosh I wonder why the "media" doesn't ever mention him...

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:21 | 4505347 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

It is pronounced "gerbils" and rodents can't blush.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:24 | 4504777 chump666
chump666's picture

Only because we want your dumb ass, crony and corrupt emerging economies on point, to feed our crony and corrupt vortex.  You all should be cut loose. 

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:27 | 4504796 Rakshas
Rakshas's picture

Oh it's a show man......

The fact that people are taking thier eye off the real ball here is just sad, does no one play chess anymore?? Man I gotta tell yah straight up I ain't the sharpest knife in the drawer but I can see it's the end of the road for the 0.000001 % and they need a distraction.  The sad truth is good help is hard to find these days - Obumbler/Rice/Nuland/that Other Cunt at the UN/ etc - watching these fucktards operate is just painful. Fuck the EU, - oh wait we didn't mean Fuck the EU we were just playin' y'all; - I mean really Vlad played the idiot Mr Ed and his retard like a fiddle over Syria so they move to plan B distract Vlad via Ukraine and take another run at Syria - the need to establish the energy corridor to europe is becoming critical for these asshats.  I wonder what would happen if they ever actually obeyed international law.  These DC assholes are so quick to talk about the rule of law - that they make up as they go along mind you - but they are so quick to ignore international laws that run contrary to thier goals/interests.  Fuck me you can't even get GM labels on food products around here........ oh yes it's a show man..... just a sad and yet almost comic tragedy  

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:41 | 4505271 Canucklehead
Canucklehead's picture

The latest classy move by Obama and the MSM was putting out the alleged Angela Merkel line about Putin.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 01:49 | 4505422 zionhead101
zionhead101's picture

Cass Sunstein is the "law of the land" never forget it.

Obama is a hand-puppet, or a cock-puppet would be more apt description.

Yes, the talking head's of WASH-DC frequently talk about 'Rule of Law', but they're talking HARVARD LAW, aka Cass Sunstein.

For the real story google "Cass Sunstein USA Constitution 2.0"

"RULE of Law", ... but WHO makes the LAW? Why Cass Sunstein.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:42 | 4505118 vulcanraven
vulcanraven's picture

I wouldnt know, canceled my cable 3 years ago and never looked back.


ZH is pretty much my only news source.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:08 | 4504703 Crash Overide
Crash Overide's picture

Do you think Vlad looks at a map and sees a chessboard?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:14 | 4504731 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Vlad looks at the map and re-draws the lines with his mind.  Like Chuck Norris.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:27 | 4504795 ILLILLILLI
ILLILLILLI's picture

Vlad removed his mask, and it was Chuck Norris...

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:49 | 4505149 Captain Kink
Captain Kink's picture

more like Keanu Reeves in the Matrix...." I know Kung Fu.."

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 05:09 | 4505737 matrix2012
matrix2012's picture

"Vlad looks at the map and re-draws the lines with his mind.  Like Chuck Norris."


Not at all!  I just learned that Vlad is indeed a JEDI MASTER!

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:30 | 4504812 agent default
agent default's picture

Vlad looks at the map and says, I want Alaska back.  The way things are going he will have it.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:36 | 4504844 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

So, Sarah Palin was right. One day, she will see Russia from her front porch.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:41 | 4504877 chump666
chump666's picture

If the EU don't hit the sanctions button, which will halt Vlad's advance, he will be looking at Estonia...

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:47 | 4504906 agent default
agent default's picture

Yes, I am sure that sanctions button will definitely get his attention.  In on way or another.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:01 | 4504962 chump666
chump666's picture

Their central bank just lifted rates, sanctions would attack the Rouble, it's a good play.  Cept UK takes a hit and so does Germany on business/investment getting pulled, oil/gas/wheat prices spike.   If the EU dumps Ukraine in Obama's lap...he won't do anything.  Vlad will eye the smaller countries that were once under the commie banner.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:51 | 4505155 Captain Kink
Captain Kink's picture

spot on.

pun intended

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 02:03 | 4505469 Crash Overide
Crash Overide's picture



Russia + China + US Debt =

China + Gold =

Russia + Energy =

What's the score again?

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 07:29 | 4505863 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Is that you billy roy boy oliely?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:45 | 4505140 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture


what did Estonia do?

I mean "what is Vlad advancing on"...besides "all of Europe"?
With 16,000 on the ground here I think we can skip past the "sanctions" talk now. This really is going to be a full fledged Russian Invasion.

Ummm..."you're kicking over millions of tombstones" here.
This is the place from whence soldiers don't get to come home and tell everyone what a mess they are.

I do agree it's probably too late to tell the Russians to "return to base" (since they still haven't made it on to the Ukrainian Bases yet.) I do think a call for "don't start something you can't finish" is in order here however.

This is the Heart of Europe....and we're talking a naked aggression here and Kiev Rus.
We haven't had this since 1945.
I think a call for Russia to "stand down" here is an absolute necessity.
These Russian kids do not know why they are there.
I can see that already...and so can every other war correspondent.
"It only gets worse from here."

This may have started already and what i say here may already be too's hard to tell...but clearly we are not "de-escalating" here.
Nor is Putin's Regime laying out demands or asking for changes...or in any way saying they are under threat or that anyone else is either. In other words NO PRETEXT.

There is an existing European Order that has been in existence for almost 70 years that is about to annihilated for no apparent reason here.
Obviously full scale retaliation is on the "the old rules apply here."

I don't think placing an "or else" demand on the table now is unwarranted. we're well past "red lines" at this point. costs already total hundreds of billions. "you have staging we will have staging area too."

this is a poor, defenseless country. "do not lose control of the situation" Mother Russia. "otherwise we will get to the capital of Kiev first."

the US Secretary of State visits tomorrow.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:22 | 4505228 chump666
chump666's picture

Absolutely.  It's got NOTHING to do with NATO encircling Russia, seen how big that f*cking country is?  How can you not encircle it.  Vlad is just reclaiming old ground, he will test EU and Germany resolve. 

I mean if you think about it Vlad is the one who will break up the EU, not the PIIGS.  Smaller countries like Estonia (EU, as an example) must be fretting.

Cold war is coming back in full effect.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 07:30 | 4505867 negative rates
negative rates's picture

It's got everything to do with the tiny dancer in his head.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:27 | 4505240 Quentin Daniels
Quentin Daniels's picture

If the EU hit the sanctions button, it's going to be bloody cold there next winter...

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:08 | 4504704 Truther
Truther's picture

Your move barry...You want sanctions? I want the Ukraine... Bitch


Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:09 | 4504706 Van Halen
Van Halen's picture

Russia better stop increasing the number of troops they're sending to the Ukraine. Or Obama's going to go out and PLAY GOLF!

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:31 | 4504821 agent default
agent default's picture

And fuck up even at that.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:10 | 4504709 The Most Intere...
The Most Interesting Frog in the World's picture

Impossible...  The federal government was closed due to snow.  Those fuckers at DOD were NOT working today...

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:19 | 4504753 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

pretty much says it all. I live in Chicagoland and have not missed a day opening my business this year. Meanwhile the fucksticks at city hall have been closed several days from the cold and snow. Governmental pussies make me sick. This fucking country is so weak, so pathetically weak and soft. Whatever it gets, it deserves.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:00 | 4504955 Bonapartist
Bonapartist's picture

"Fuck you - pay me" - US govt.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:09 | 4504710 Hulk
Hulk's picture

Maybe we can lure them back to russia with a nice cheesecake !!!

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:45 | 4504879 Estrella
Estrella's picture

Maybe we can lure them back to russia with a nice cheesecake !!!

Perhaps a shrubbery?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:31 | 4505085 Calmyourself
Calmyourself's picture

Only if you cut it down with a "HERRING"!! NEE, Men In Tights,  jeez I was drunk, I laughed so hard..

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:34 | 4505095 Champie
Champie's picture

Obama must cut down the mightiest military power in the region with.........a HERRING!

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:11 | 4504714 nightshiftsucks
nightshiftsucks's picture

I didn't want war before but now that some of you have pissed me off I really want to see the US Air Force against those S400's.Lets find out the truth.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:24 | 4504771 TungstenBars
TungstenBars's picture

Considering the S400 can shoot ICBMs down the US is going to need more planes if any pilot is dumb enough to cross the border. 


long lockheed martin 

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 07:58 | 4505736 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

I thought Lockheed got in some tif with Stompyfeet or his mmomy and was laying off tons of high paid US engineering talent left and right.

On second thought, perhaps there's an insanely leveraged ETF for that...

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:32 | 4505088 Ness.
Ness.'s picture

Do you think that's her real hair?  I'm thinking, not.  Call me craaazy?

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:42 | 4505121 UselessEater
UselessEater's picture

visiting her new masters????

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:11 | 4504717 JustPrintMoreDuh
JustPrintMoreDuh's picture

"made up gibberish more fabricated than anything the Chinese Department of Truth or US Bureau of Labor can possibly goalseek"


instant classic!


Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:12 | 4504718 rsnoble
rsnoble's picture

This world just isn't big enough for more than 1 superpower.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:38 | 4505102 Champie
Champie's picture

I think we are finding that this world isn't big enough for even 1 Super Power to exploit to its heart's content.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:13 | 4504724 Tracerfan
Tracerfan's picture

Did the DOD find time to do that?  Hope it didn't interrupt their staging of drag-queen entertainment events on U.S. military bases, like the one just done in Japan.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:15 | 4504734 cdude
cdude's picture



Not exactly in context.... read:

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:33 | 4505251 Canucklehead
Canucklehead's picture

Go back and read that press release again.  You don't understand boilerplate blah, blah, blah.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:16 | 4504736 GumbyMe
GumbyMe's picture

The west pushed Putin's buttons long enough until they hit the launch button. Now the corrupt and hypocritical bastards will get to eat their own words as Putin takes over eastern Ukraine and rubs the rag in their faces. The Russians should have fun with this, and order the DoD to pull all US forces back to the US.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:22 | 4504738 Freddie
Freddie's picture

DoD and Pentagon are now running gay dances on US military bases.  LOL!

Here is more on why the F-35 fighter is junk.  The DoD and Pentagon just love Obama and their budgets.  The military are Obama boys. Joke military and country. Lying to the country and taxpayers about there defective weapons systems.

Stealth is a scam.

How the F-35 and F-22 will be tracked and eliminated.

I am not being anti-American just that the defense contractors and DoD have sold taxpayers a bill of goods.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:22 | 4504765 nightshiftsucks
nightshiftsucks's picture

Yeah no need to be afraid of homo's,I'll bet that you coud take on that gay defesive end,right Freddy you little bitch.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:28 | 4504800 TungstenBars
TungstenBars's picture

Someone's angry their military is becoming a joke..

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:32 | 4504823 nightshiftsucks
nightshiftsucks's picture

I don't care I just want the truth,it's all bullshit until the missles fly.Until then it's that my dick is bigger than yours game.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:34 | 4504817 Freddie
Freddie's picture

LOL!  I am pretty good at throwing out chaff and decoys to attract govt drone boys who love Obama.   You bit like a dummy.   Do you work for Lockheed Martin or the State Dept.

More videos on why the F-35 is a piece of junk.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 22:27 | 4504786 Freddie
Freddie's picture

F-22 is crap too.  This is why it was cancelled.  A maintenance hog just like the C-5A and the B-1 bomber.  They rarely fly because they are maint hogs.

Maybe the DoD should just keep having gay dances at the military bases. Obama is their hero.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:04 | 4504980 nightshiftsucks
nightshiftsucks's picture

And freddy sucks big dick,I know it's true because I read it on the internet.

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 00:19 | 4505225 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

#Losing. Move on.

Mon, 03/03/2014 - 23:06 | 4504987 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

And they're going to de-commission the A-10 Warthog.

They are either going to use nukes or surrender.

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