Russian Troops Storm Ukraine Air Force Base In Crimea, Reuters Confirms

Tyler Durden's picture


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Update, and this time from Reuters:  


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More lies, propaganda, or for once, the truth? Just out from Time's Simon Shuster:

Then again, considering the source is disinformation central Ukraine Pravda, take it with a huge grain of salt.

More from Ukraine's version of Interfax:

Russian military assault Ukrainian military unit in Sevastopol


In Sevastopol, the Russian soldiers stormed the Ukrainian military unit A2355 , said the agency " Interfax- Ukraine " duty of the assistant .


He said the Russian military army "KAMAZ" struck the gate of a military unit , captured near building and break out to the command post .


Part of the territory located about 100 Ukrainian military strength is unknown assailants .


Military unit - 2355 located in Sevastopol Yuharyniy beam.


As reported , March 5, Defense Minister Sergei Shoigu said that the Russian troops in the Crimea there.

For now the AUDJPY, and its S&P500 derivative are not too happy about the rumor.

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surf0766's picture

Vacation time ! Fourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !

waterwitch's picture


There...fixed it for ya.



'in coming' would be better, don't ya think?

Joe Davola's picture

We crashed the gate doin' 98 and I said 'let them truckers roll'

10-4 pig-pen

john39's picture

vacation, or, cover story for hiding out in a deep underground military base...

stant's picture

brave sir obo " he bravely fled and he bravely ran"

Event Horizon's picture
In Ukraine, coup owns you
Thought Processor's picture



Pics or it didn't happen.

tmosley's picture

In Soviet Ukraine, dogs teach YOU to roll over.

Is not as funny as Soviet Russia joke because is Ukraine.

superflex's picture

Looks like Panco Villa is reporting from the Crimean Peninsula.

You know as soon as the first shot is fired, this syphillis ridden pussy is ducking for cover while reaching for his smartphoe to get that 140 character tweet out.

MarsInScorpio's picture

How to win the "When will Obama run like a rabid coward?" game:


Have you notced the pattern? When the pressure of being president goes up - Obama gets out.


This weekend vacatiohn - just as he is needed the most, Obama makes himself available the least.


Next vacation? Whenever the pressure hits again . . .


johnQpublic's picture

just as he is needed most?

for what?

National Blessing's picture

Fuck the Ukraine.  Let the Euro trash clean up their own backyard.  Bastards.

nmewn's picture

"Let the Euro trash clean up their own backyard."

Pretty much how I feel about it.

Muppet Pimp's picture

Serious question: When does Texas start sending men into neighboring states to assure free and fair elections to decide to align with Texas or the liberal atheistic heathen people currently known as the West?

Leraconteur's picture

...around about March 1836 but the northern Mexicans did not want them so they returned to their country.

old naughty's picture

b,b, but then a generation later (in 1861) a war breaks out...

cause and effect..or, rather, effect, and backward to cause !

Tall Tom's picture

Are you writing about the French-Mexican War that broke out December 8, 1861? 


Or are you writing about the War of Northern Aggression which broke out on April 12, 1861?

old naughty's picture

Thanks for enlightening me...I am unfamiliar with Texas spilling over into French-Mexican conflict...

BigJim's picture

ZH is very quiet lately... are the Tylers having trouble recieving instructions from Moscow?

Only kidding!

Sorta ;-) 

Nexus789's picture

The US caused the mess. Not good at cleaning up after yourself are you.

StychoKiller's picture

Hey, teleprompters don't just read themselves!

Darth Stacker's picture

What's the difference between President Obama and a 900 pound Siberian tiger?

The Siberian tiger is the world's second biggest pussy!

Mr. Mandelbrot's picture

Wow!  Wanna join the PEN 15 club?

New_Meat's picture


"... just as he is needed the most,..."

Nope, no need at all.

- Ned

beyondtheprogramming's picture


if you'll only beLIEve the pics, please allow me to introduce you to GreenScreen and Photoshop....

Blazed's picture

The Yid mafia want to rape Ukraine, economically and socially, like they did with Russia and Eastern Europe in the form of the Kosher Bolsheviks. Ultimately, they want back in control of Russia again, except Putin is in the way. An ethnic convert discusses the usual mafia players and their game.

caconhma's picture


The entire Gold reserve of Ukraine has been moved to the United States


According to employees  of "Borispol" airport, Ukraine, tonight at 2 AM, an unregistered transport aircraft took off  from the airport.

According to the staff of the "Borispol" airport in Ukraine, four large armed trucks and two cargo minivan Volkswagen without license plates arrived to the airport and parked near a transport aircraft at the end of one of runways. About fifteen people in black uniform, wearing masks and bullet-proof vests came out of these vans. Some of them were armed with assault rifles. These people have moved more than 40 heavy boxes from the trucks into the aircraft.

After it, some of these mysterious men also boarded the aircraft. All loading was carried out in great haste. After this, the aircraft immediately took off.

People observing this mysterious "special operation" immediately notified the senior officials of the "Borispol" airport who issued a strong warning "to stay out for your own good".

Later, one of the senior officials of the former Ministry of Revenue and Taxes reported that, according to his information, last night, at the order of one of the "new Ukrainian leaders" the entire gold reserve of Ukraine has been sent to in the United States.  


Tall Tom's picture

More Gold to rehypothecate? Didn't they listen to the reports that Germany cannot get her Gold back?


(Maybe the flight went to Germany...)


Good luck getting your Gold back you stupid Ukrainian morons.

BigJim's picture

Reminds me of when the Spanish government sent their gold hoard (one of the world's largest) to Stalin for 'safekeeping' to keep it out of the hands of the fascists. Cue collapse of currency, and concommitant loss in purchasing power helped the fascists... win.


BigJim's picture

According to this it was quite a large hoard, too: 

Maybe Germany is about to get a surprise tranche of its gold back? 

Janet: Hello?

Angela: Hey, Janet! It's me, Angela!

Janet: Oh, Hello, Angela! Are you pleased with your delivery of 36.1 tonnes of gold?

Angela: Yes, yes I am. But I'd be even happier if you'd taken the time to remove the 'Ukraine Gold Reserve - if found please return to Ukraine National Bank' stickers.

Meanwhile, I can only find one mention of this story, here:

thecoloredsky's picture

surprised it lasted that long in ukraine

adonisdemilo's picture

Does this mean the US are going to let the EU flounder on their own now that they have the Ukraine's gold.

bob_stl's picture

By the time we got into Tulsa Town,
We had eighty-five trucks in all.
But they's a roadblock up on the cloverleaf,
And them bears was wall-to-wall.
Yeah, them smokies is thick as bugs on a bumper;
They even had a bear in the air!
I says, "Callin' all trucks, this here's the Duck.
"We about to go a-huntin' bear."

frenzic's picture

gawd I used to love that flick, only thing that could touch it for me was the blues brothers

cossack55's picture

More likely goin' huntin' using Bear.

waterwitch's picture


Are you on the metric system or what?

johnQpublic's picture

vehicles used to go that fast

all of 'em

trucks, cars, buses, the lot

they werent priuses back then

Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Miscommunication:  They heard there was a "Party" and also heard "Potato vodka...", but missed ""Potato vodka is all that's left", and turned into "Gate-crashers".

"Nazdrovye".  Nice driveway.  Nice driving.

Dugald's picture


Russian Shock and Awe

Latest technology used to remove gate, what other frightening weapons of destruction will be revealed?

Soviet War Dogs released in Crimea to clean up cat problem....

From another aspect........Crime A, aye there's the rub....

Fidel Sarcastro's picture

New highs in Colorado, errr, the ES then??

BaBaBouy's picture

FAST, Mr. Comex, ""SHORT Paper GOLD SHORT GOLD"" ...

kliguy38's picture

" I said I want 60,000 contracts sold NOW ....NOW I TELL YOU .........NOW "

bania's picture

Simon Shuster - good name if you're in the publishing business.

sixsigma cygnusatratus's picture

Apparently, Putin is a more effective Community Organizer than others....

Bastiat's picture

In Russia community organizes you!


hat tip to Boris.

disabledvet's picture

you like to get butt stroked to the head too, meh?

disabledvet's picture

you clowns have just seen Russian Spestnaz...not me...and those were warning shots and this is just Day One.

Here is day seven:
for all you down-arrowers out there...that's you on the ground.
and me too...