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Russian Troops Storm Ukraine Air Force Base In Crimea, Reuters Confirms

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Update 2: ARMED ATTACKERS LEAVE UKRAINE MILITARY BASE IN SEVASTOPOL: TV5

* * *

Update, and this time from Reuters:  

  • ARMED MEN ENTER UKRAINIAN MILITARY POST IN CRIMEA AND TAKE CONTROL, NO SHOTS FIRED - REUTERS REPORTER ON THE SCENE
  • UKRAINIANS AND FORCES THOUGHT TO BE RUSSIANS HOLD NEGOTIATIONS AFTER MILITARY POST TAKEN, NO ARMS SEIZED - REUTERS REPORTER

* * *

More lies, propaganda, or for once, the truth? Just out from Time's Simon Shuster:

Then again, considering the source is disinformation central Ukraine Pravda, take it with a huge grain of salt.

More from Ukraine's version of Interfax:

Russian military assault Ukrainian military unit in Sevastopol

 

In Sevastopol, the Russian soldiers stormed the Ukrainian military unit A2355 , said the agency " Interfax- Ukraine " duty of the assistant .

 

He said the Russian military army "KAMAZ" struck the gate of a military unit , captured near building and break out to the command post .

 

Part of the territory located about 100 Ukrainian military strength is unknown assailants .

 

Military unit - 2355 located in Sevastopol Yuharyniy beam.

 

As reported , March 5, Defense Minister Sergei Shoigu said that the Russian troops in the Crimea there.

For now the AUDJPY, and its S&P500 derivative are not too happy about the rumor.

 

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Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:12 | 4522247 surf0766
surf0766's picture

Vacation time ! Fourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:15 | 4522260 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

Fore.......

There...fixed it for ya.

 

Actually

'in coming' would be better, don't ya think?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:17 | 4522276 Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

We crashed the gate doin' 98 and I said 'let them truckers roll'

10-4 pig-pen

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:40 | 4522401 john39
john39's picture

vacation, or, cover story for hiding out in a deep underground military base...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:11 | 4522546 stant
stant's picture

brave sir obo " he bravely fled and he bravely ran"

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:40 | 4522710 Event Horizon
Event Horizon's picture
In Ukraine, coup owns you
Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:51 | 4522755 Thought Processor
Thought Processor's picture

 

 

Pics or it didn't happen.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:56 | 4522776 tmosley
tmosley's picture

In Soviet Ukraine, dogs teach YOU to roll over.

Is not as funny as Soviet Russia joke because is Ukraine.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:00 | 4522791 superflex
superflex's picture

Looks like Panco Villa is reporting from the Crimean Peninsula.

You know as soon as the first shot is fired, this syphillis ridden pussy is ducking for cover while reaching for his smartphoe to get that 140 character tweet out.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:10 | 4522835 MarsInScorpio
MarsInScorpio's picture

How to win the "When will Obama run like a rabid coward?" game:

 

Have you notced the pattern? When the pressure of being president goes up - Obama gets out.

 

This weekend vacatiohn - just as he is needed the most, Obama makes himself available the least.

 

Next vacation? Whenever the pressure hits again . . .

-30-

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:52 | 4523010 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

just as he is needed most?

for what?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:32 | 4523336 National Blessing
National Blessing's picture

Fuck the Ukraine.  Let the Euro trash clean up their own backyard.  Bastards.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:44 | 4523377 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"Let the Euro trash clean up their own backyard."

Pretty much how I feel about it.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 20:06 | 4523441 Muppet Pimp
Muppet Pimp's picture

Serious question: When does Texas start sending men into neighboring states to assure free and fair elections to decide to align with Texas or the liberal atheistic heathen people currently known as the West?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 20:29 | 4523500 Leraconteur
Leraconteur's picture

...around about March 1836 but the northern Mexicans did not want them so they returned to their country.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 01:26 | 4524310 old naughty
old naughty's picture

b,b, but then a generation later (in 1861) a war breaks out...

cause and effect..or, rather, effect, and backward to cause !

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 06:47 | 4524533 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Are you writing about the French-Mexican War that broke out December 8, 1861?

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/French_intervention_in_Mexico 

 

Or are you writing about the War of Northern Aggression which broke out on April 12, 1861?

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 07:15 | 4524553 old naughty
old naughty's picture

Thanks for enlightening me...I am unfamiliar with Texas spilling over into French-Mexican conflict...

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 10:46 | 4524636 BigJim
BigJim's picture

ZH is very quiet lately... are the Tylers having trouble recieving instructions from Moscow?

Only kidding!

Sorta ;-) 

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:58 | 4523414 Clever Name
Clever Name's picture

Your blog sucks, spammer.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 06:55 | 4524539 Nexus789
Nexus789's picture

The US caused the mess. Not good at cleaning up after yourself are you.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 04:23 | 4524463 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Hey, teleprompters don't just read themselves!

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:59 | 4523418 Darth Stacker
Darth Stacker's picture

What's the difference between President Obama and a 900 pound Siberian tiger?

The Siberian tiger is the world's second biggest pussy!

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 21:23 | 4523657 Mr. Mandelbrot
Mr. Mandelbrot's picture

Wow!  Wanna join the PEN 15 club?

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 09:28 | 4524668 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

MarsInScorpio:

"... just as he is needed the most,..."

Nope, no need at all.

- Ned

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:01 | 4522797 beyondtheprogramming
beyondtheprogramming's picture

really?

if you'll only beLIEve the pics, please allow me to introduce you to GreenScreen and Photoshop....

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:15 | 4522860 john39
john39's picture

Charles jaco...  reporting from Kuwait, er, new york city...

http://thedanashow.wordpress.com/2009/12/14/charles-jaco-threatens-blogosphere-over-cnn-video/

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 18:23 | 4523081 Blazed
Blazed's picture

The Yid mafia want to rape Ukraine, economically and socially, like they did with Russia and Eastern Europe in the form of the Kosher Bolsheviks. Ultimately, they want back in control of Russia again, except Putin is in the way. An ethnic convert discusses the usual mafia players and their game.

http://www.realjewnews.com/?p=908

http://www.realjewnews.com/?p=898

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 21:58 | 4523768 caconhma
caconhma's picture

 

The entire Gold reserve of Ukraine has been moved to the United States

03.08.2014

According to employees  of "Borispol" airport, Ukraine, tonight at 2 AM, an unregistered transport aircraft took off  from the airport.

According to the staff of the "Borispol" airport in Ukraine, four large armed trucks and two cargo minivan Volkswagen without license plates arrived to the airport and parked near a transport aircraft at the end of one of runways. About fifteen people in black uniform, wearing masks and bullet-proof vests came out of these vans. Some of them were armed with assault rifles. These people have moved more than 40 heavy boxes from the trucks into the aircraft.

After it, some of these mysterious men also boarded the aircraft. All loading was carried out in great haste. After this, the aircraft immediately took off.

People observing this mysterious "special operation" immediately notified the senior officials of the "Borispol" airport who issued a strong warning "to stay out for your own good".

Later, one of the senior officials of the former Ministry of Revenue and Taxes reported that, according to his information, last night, at the order of one of the "new Ukrainian leaders" the entire gold reserve of Ukraine has been sent to in the United States.  

 

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 02:07 | 4524265 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

More Gold to rehypothecate? Didn't they listen to the reports that Germany cannot get her Gold back?

 

(Maybe the flight went to Germany...)

 

Good luck getting your Gold back you stupid Ukrainian morons.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 09:00 | 4524639 BigJim
BigJim's picture

Reminds me of when the Spanish government sent their gold hoard (one of the world's largest) to Stalin for 'safekeeping' to keep it out of the hands of the fascists. Cue collapse of currency, and concommitant loss in purchasing power helped the fascists... win.

D'Oh!

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 09:17 | 4524657 BigJim
BigJim's picture

According to this it was quite a large hoard, too:

http://rt.com/business/ukraine-gold-reserve-production-958/ 

Maybe Germany is about to get a surprise tranche of its gold back? 

Janet: Hello?

Angela: Hey, Janet! It's me, Angela!

Janet: Oh, Hello, Angela! Are you pleased with your delivery of 36.1 tonnes of gold?

Angela: Yes, yes I am. But I'd be even happier if you'd taken the time to remove the 'Ukraine Gold Reserve - if found please return to Ukraine National Bank' stickers.

Meanwhile, I can only find one mention of this story, here:

http://iskra-news.info/news/segodnja_nochju_iz_borispolja_v_ssha_strarto...

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 07:13 | 4524551 thecoloredsky
thecoloredsky's picture

surprised it lasted that long in ukraine

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 07:18 | 4524557 adonisdemilo
adonisdemilo's picture

Does this mean the US are going to let the EU flounder on their own now that they have the Ukraine's gold.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:12 | 4522558 bob_stl
bob_stl's picture

By the time we got into Tulsa Town,
We had eighty-five trucks in all.
But they's a roadblock up on the cloverleaf,
And them bears was wall-to-wall.
Yeah, them smokies is thick as bugs on a bumper;
They even had a bear in the air!
I says, "Callin' all trucks, this here's the Duck.
"We about to go a-huntin' bear."

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:55 | 4522759 frenzic
frenzic's picture

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_VpFyTKvBs

gawd I used to love that flick, only thing that could touch it for me was the blues brothers

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:53 | 4522764 cossack55
cossack55's picture

More likely goin' huntin' using Bear.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:34 | 4522668 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

98?

Are you on the metric system or what?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:54 | 4523020 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

vehicles used to go that fast

all of 'em

trucks, cars, buses, the lot

they werent priuses back then

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:40 | 4522965 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Miscommunication:  They heard there was a "Party" and also heard "Potato vodka...", but missed ""Potato vodka is all that's left", and turned into "Gate-crashers".

"Nazdrovye".  Nice driveway.  Nice driving.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:45 | 4522969 Dugald
Dugald's picture

 

Russian Shock and Awe

Latest technology used to remove gate, what other frightening weapons of destruction will be revealed?

Soviet War Dogs released in Crimea to clean up cat problem....

From another aspect........Crime A, aye there's the rub....

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 23:53 | 4524111 Fidel Sarcastro
Fidel Sarcastro's picture

New highs in Colorado, errr, the ES then??

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:17 | 4522278 BaBaBouy
BaBaBouy's picture

FAST, Mr. Comex, ""SHORT Paper GOLD SHORT GOLD"" ...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:29 | 4522348 kliguy38
kliguy38's picture

" I said I want 60,000 contracts sold NOW ....NOW I TELL YOU .........NOW "

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:34 | 4522372 bania
bania's picture

Simon Shuster - good name if you're in the publishing business.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:40 | 4522398 sixsigma cygnus...
sixsigma cygnusatratus's picture

Apparently, Putin is a more effective Community Organizer than others....

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:46 | 4522422 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture

In Russia community organizes you!

 

hat tip to Boris.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:17 | 4522581 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

golf clap to BO...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:49 | 4522434 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

you like to get butt stroked to the head too, meh?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 18:27 | 4523119 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

you clowns have just seen Russian Spestnaz...not me...and those were warning shots and this is just Day One.

Here is day seven: http://inagist.com/all/442051769892622336/
for all you down-arrowers out there...that's you on the ground.
and me too...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:31 | 4523332 Independent
Independent's picture

What hurts more but they never film is the poverty in the wake of IMF looting.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 00:38 | 4524239 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

Whatever.  One form of tyranny does not make another better.  You deserve what you get.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 01:21 | 4524306 123dobryden
123dobryden's picture

A staggering 35 percent of household wealth in Russia is owned by just 110 people, the highest level of inequality in the world barring a few small Caribbean islands, a report by a major investment bank says.

By contrast, billionaires worldwide account for just 1-2 percent of total wealth, Credit Suisse said in its report published Wednesday. Russia has one billionaire for every $11 billion in wealth while in the rest of the world there is one for every $170 billion.

 

FOR ARMY OF PUTINLOVERS

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 21:25 | 4523665 Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

I'll take notice when they start droning wedding parties in Western Ukraine.

You know, like the killers you love.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 22:09 | 4523803 bigkahuna
bigkahuna's picture

They are afraid of droning caucasians. They don't want to wake whitey up.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 09:30 | 4524670 BigJim
BigJim's picture

How do we know they're Russians in that vid?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:40 | 4522399 skwid vacuous
skwid vacuous's picture

his picture makes me tend towards not taking him seriously...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:50 | 4522450 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

a regular Joker they say...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:23 | 4523298 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

A: "Simon Shuster"

Q: "What is an embedded Moxxad reporter?"

p.s.  Can't be that big or real a story, if no one else has picked it up.

pps. TIME:  All the News that's fit to be published or manufactured.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:19 | 4522290 surf0766
surf0766's picture

Does anyone really say fore or four ? I have never golfed

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:23 | 4522306 redpill
redpill's picture

Yep, and if you suck you say it a lot.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:41 | 4522407 maskone909
maskone909's picture

 i really suck at golf!  last time at the driving range i managed to hit the lady next to me.  who does that!?!? basketball is a different story.  5'8 white guy who can grab rim. 

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:50 | 4522448 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

I literally hit a cow one time when I was playing in high school.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:32 | 4522655 TruthHunter
TruthHunter's picture

"I literally hit a cow one time when I was playing in high school."

Did you say FOREK?

Or where's the beef?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:07 | 4522823 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

Yeah, I hit an ex-buddy on the driving range, I didn't tell him to go right up to the rope and start hitting, hell no!!!

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:14 | 4522852 JoeSexPack
JoeSexPack's picture

Dad yelled 'fore' once, Koreans in front (out of sight) didn't speak English.

 

Direct hit at 150 yards to one's head.

 

He walked it off.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:31 | 4522929 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

bwaahahahahaa, head in one!

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 21:13 | 4523639 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

I'll bet you a hundred bucks you slice it into the woods. 

Gambling is illegal at Bushwood sir, and I never slice. 

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 01:03 | 4524284 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

Caddyshack. Good movie.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 02:00 | 4524343 Cpl Hicks
Cpl Hicks's picture

RIP, Harold Ramis!

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 08:04 | 4524570 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

Gunga....galunga.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:41 | 4522972 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

koreans are  tough

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:56 | 4523028 Rusty Shorts
Rusty Shorts's picture

yeah, thick skulls and all...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 18:13 | 4523070 Karl von Bahnhof
Karl von Bahnhof's picture

That was clear red line, down there on the street!

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:56 | 4523408 walküre
walküre's picture

you're as white as O. is black? ancestry.com is your friend....

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 09:32 | 4524673 BigJim
BigJim's picture

 5'8 white guy who can grab rim. 

Grabbing rim, huh? You though about getting a job in D.C?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:45 | 4522417 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

And if you're reading this you spew! Thanks for that one RP.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:25 | 4522321 Looney
Looney's picture

In ZeroSpeak it is actually FOAR!!! I think?  ;-)

Looney

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:57 | 4523411 walküre
walküre's picture

No, it's MOAR. You recognize the vivid ZH golfer as the guy yelling MOAR every time he tees off

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:44 | 4522984 object_orient
object_orient's picture

I hit a lousy tee shot once and yelled "Four!" Everyone ducked and covered despite my spelling error. Go figure.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 19:29 | 4523326 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

Maybe that explains my one day honeymoon and immediate divorce. On my honeymoon, I thought my new bride yelled, "I need fourplay, you goon!" So I called my three poker buddies to join us.  When they arrived my bride got pissed off and ran to her mommy in the next room. I never understood why she dumped me until now. 

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 20:20 | 4523453 grunk
grunk's picture

I suck so bad at golf I yell "eight!" (or is it "ate?" "aight?").

I only yell "fore!" when I'm putting.

Sometimes I have the caddy go two or three holes ahead and yell "fore!" just so people are ready.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 23:29 | 4524039 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Quite a few golf courses in Western PA which is awesome because they all cannot ban you due to the fact you are drunk, and terrible.

This summer I put a green shot into some rich dudes landscaping and had to root around for my ball while he and his guests stared impassively.

His meticulous Mexican maintained yard began not more than 15 yards past the pin; they had to have seen where my precious orange range ball went, but do you think they gave me any help? No!

I rooted for a while in his landscaping, leered at his big fake titted wife, took a drop and dug a divot large enough to plant a pear tree in.

He was probably a banker.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 00:55 | 4524267 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

my precious orange range ball

that you used a orange range ball is absolutely brilliant, let alone everything else.

that story made my day, thanks mate.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:21 | 4522883 inflatio_in_aeternum
inflatio_in_aeternum's picture

Now, only if you could fix his slice.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:21 | 4522884 inflatio_in_aeternum
inflatio_in_aeternum's picture

Now, only if you could fix his slice.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:16 | 4522267 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

I always feel a little safer when that guy is away from the WH and on the golf course.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:28 | 4522341 Payne
Payne's picture

In reality Ukranian officer was drunk stole a Russian truck to get back to base, ran into gate.  Russians came to arrest the Officer for theft of vital property.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:31 | 4522360 DogOfSinope
DogOfSinope's picture

Dash Cam video on YouTube follows shortly! ;-)

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 18:37 | 4523163 123dobryden
123dobryden's picture

haha, wait when they will come to take Alaska back my dear, then you can post this "funny"

 

Ukraine above all, ....especialy above russia now

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:22 | 4522887 rotagen
rotagen's picture

Obama is a bluffing pussy puppet, putin has character.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 06:55 | 4524540 Tall Tom
Tall Tom's picture

OBAMA is a fucking MURDERING PSYCHOPATH...

PUKIN is a fucking MURDERING PSYCHOPATH...

 

They both have character...a very EVIL CHARACTER at that.

 

Why are you so blind???

 

If you choose EVIL then you shall reap EVIl...if not in this life then the following one in Hellfire.

 

A choice for the lesser of two EVILS is still a choice for EVIL.

 

 

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:46 | 4522971 Freddie
Freddie's picture

The guy sending the tweets is Simon Shuster?  Is that a Russian or Ukrainian name or.....?  More BS from the corrupt news media.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 18:39 | 4523169 123dobryden
123dobryden's picture

i dont know, but it means "shoemaker", so maybe ukrainian as russians still walk barefoot

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 21:21 | 4523651 HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

Greg Hunter on USA Watchdog today (always enjoy hearing Greg's view):

http://usawatchdog.com/weekly-news-wrap-up-3-7-14/#more-11819

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 21:52 | 4523750 Berspankme
Berspankme's picture

but...but...but  Obama told putin not to do it

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 07:09 | 4524548 Tom_333
Tom_333's picture

You just gotta admire the way they are doing this. A suave combination of seduction and rape. Low-level military invasion , avoiding too much confrontation and blood-shed , dispensing the takeover in gradual doses, confusing the observers with one day removing massed tropps at the borders and the next day gate-crashing the military bases. Snap-fixed political veener with rapidly conducted "parlamentary votes". And so on.

These guys in the Kremlin are much better than Bush and Rummy and Cheney. Full spectrum dominance Russian style.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:13 | 4522248 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

What threats will this, if true, lead to from the US?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:24 | 4522313 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Cue horse-faced Herman Munster reading from a script of lies and wagging his index finger at the TV camera.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:28 | 4522342 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

"Bye-bye, boys! Have fun storming the Ukraine Air Force Base!"

The US can't do anything. Putin plays chess while Obama and Kerry play with their feces.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:37 | 4522386 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

Being the monkeys they are...

DaddyO

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:55 | 4522479 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Ahem...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:40 | 4522400 waterwitch
waterwitch's picture

""A nuke flew over the cuckoos nest?"

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:41 | 4522404 DogOfSinope
DogOfSinope's picture

20 soldiers "storming" 100 soldiers in defensive position?!
...you can't make this stuff up...
Were they Ninja Turtles?

The best strategy for Ukrainians would be
to politely but resolutely ask western MSM to stop siding them. This is embarrassing.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:47 | 4522431 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture

+ 100 TMNT

    Guess they are not expecting much resistance since they are Pro-Russian "Ukranians"...still a funny headline.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:30 | 4522904 bitHedge
bitHedge's picture

So Russian and Crimean soldiers walk into a bar,

they have some vodka,

Crimean soldiers know where all the good prostitutes just back from Sochi are,

They all get on truck to go meet them at Crimean base,

They crash into fence, at least 50 men with ball injuries reported.

Medic say he has never see them this blue

 

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:32 | 4522930 DogOfSinope
DogOfSinope's picture

Ninja Turtles have left the building. With no shots fired.
I guess we're back to commercials...

Since both Russan and Ukarainin officers are actually palls that studied in the same military academies, I guess that guys in garrison simply made a good round of Borsch and reckoned that it would be pity to waste the extra. So, they invited their buddies.
20 Russian guys brought some cases of Vodka and some Olivier salad as a side dish.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:13 | 4522249 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Knock, Knock, Knockn' on Heavens Door....

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:28 | 4522338 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

You sure are an unpopular one.  Ever think it may be YOU?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:30 | 4522354 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Hey, careful, Flak has a shelf of library books.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:36 | 4522370 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Everyone must hate him for his intelligence.  Like the mooslims hate us for our freedumbs.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:54 | 4522472 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

go call for Sgt Shultz Colonel Dink.

"Clever American Air Force Officer and sneaky band of brothers have successfully escaped."

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:57 | 4522493 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Whoa, I just can't stop laughing.  Pretty clever.  Hope you didn't pull a muscle thinking up that one.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:15 | 4522571 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

I think your avatar is completely appropriate for you...

I wouldn't change a thing..

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:22 | 4522603 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Thanks!  I think so too, but I chose it for reasons other than what you may believe.

Unfortunately I can't say the same for you.  There's a whole metric shit ton I'd change about you but I don't think it would help anyways.

Got a greenie from me.  Have a nice day pumpkin!

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:05 | 4522813 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

Klink, you bumbling fool, what are you yammering about now?  What's with all the negative vibes, baby?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:17 | 4522838 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

I have a very special dark spot in my heart for Flaky.  He's earned it.

Be nice to me Abby, I like you.  Don't ruin it.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:25 | 4522899 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

Just joshin' my friend, lol...we can all be babbling fools at times, me especially!

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:27 | 4522909 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Good to hear.  I'm always willing to take a little good natured ribbing.  Keep horsing around.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 23:35 | 4524059 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Klink I luv ya but when you engadge in a shit slinging contest with a monkey like that you lose even if you win.

Now, kicking Fonestar is like beating on a Piñata filled with party drugs; it's fun and you know a reward will eventually spill out.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 01:32 | 4524318 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Thanks Rafterman, I get the point.  Except for me kicking flak is like kicking Bonestar, they're both like beating on a Pinata (sorry can't do that funny squiggly thing over the n).  Both just never give up their position, no matter how misguided.

Appreciate you dropping in for a comment.  Hope you're having a good evening.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 09:52 | 4524693 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

ñ

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 20:34 | 4526322 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Show off! :)

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 11:00 | 4524820 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Keep to the insults buddy...

Because that is all you have and without' em you are lost...

Example 

ending here

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 14:02 | 4525219 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Whatever flaky!  Just because I don't agree with your whole train of thought.  I gave you what I agreed with.  You just wanted to keep pushing your wrongheaded thinking.

Others votes speak for themselves.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 19:44 | 4526109 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Look, I promise to stop making make you look like an ass in any real debate if you you simply give up trolling...

You appear to  have nothing but insults to offer; you are simply chasing cheap greenies...

If you want to have a real discussion, then act like it...

Otherwise, just fuck off and mind your own business....

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 20:32 | 4526304 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Hahaha, again you're delusional.  I think the votes from fellow ZH members say it all.  Even for your comments I don't participate in.  I'm secure in my assessment of the situations versus yours.

Good day puddinhead!

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 21:02 | 4526408 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

So you choose to play the stupid cunt card...

So be it...

Sun, 03/09/2014 - 09:42 | 4527289 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

I did, I pulled your card out of the deck and didn't want it.  So I threw it on the pile.  Feel free to pick it up.

Sat, 03/08/2014 - 07:32 | 4524573 agent default
agent default's picture

Now let's not get into the whole avatar thing again shall we SS tank boy?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:32 | 4522366 sessinpo
sessinpo's picture

You lost him at "think."

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:34 | 4522376 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

OK that one made me chuckle out loud.  Thanks for the laugh.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:43 | 4522410 Lore
Lore's picture

If it wasn't for Flak, there would be nobody left on ZH to plug the old "global warming" narrative. Give the guy a break. At least he isn't a stoner... Yet.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:14 | 4522568 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

You guys enjoying your circle jerk?

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:20 | 4522593 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Hahaha, it was a fair question.  Just felt I had to pose it.  Such a benign comment you made, yet you had every down vote on it until I asked.  Then it seems your supporters (we know who they are), started kicking in.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:26 | 4522906 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

I think you quite enjoy it...flak...akak...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:17 | 4522864 trader1
trader1's picture

that's untrue.

i'm still here.

 

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:50 | 4522447 dogbreath
dogbreath's picture

Him    ???????????????  

Flak is a STRONGINDEPENDENTWOMAN TM  

 

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:23 | 4522610 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Are you still having fantasies about me?

I could dig that link out from a few days ago where you more than hinted at such...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 15:29 | 4522349 angel_of_joy
angel_of_joy's picture

Request denied !

You don't believe in Heaven, anyway...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 16:13 | 4522564 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

Damn straight...

And the people that do are in for a disappointment, not that they will ever realize it...

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:01 | 4522794 SMG
SMG's picture

You've been dead before?  You sound so sure.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:20 | 4522877 john39
john39's picture

as sure as he is that global warming is making the world colder.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:27 | 4522913 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

Some are hoping there is a heaven while others hope there ain't.

Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:34 | 4522942 trader1
Fri, 03/07/2014 - 17:30 | 4522919 Abi Normal
Abi Normal's picture

flak, let me pose a quick thing to you:

 

Suppose you are right, there is no God, no Heaven, nada, then you and me my friend are honkey dorey!  No worries!

 

Now suppose the Bible is right, then you gotta a wee bit of a problem, don't ya? Knod your head up and down...Something to chew on, that is all, have a good day sir!

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