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John Kerry To Explain Where The New Red Line Is - Live Feed

Tyler Durden's picture


On the heels of yet another multi-hour meeting with Russian foreign minister Lavrov, John Kerry takes to the podium to explain next steps...




Live stream below:



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Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:15 | 4547705 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Brhrhrhrhrhr, it's cold here in Moscow, Wilbur.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:17 | 4547709 Hippocratic Oaf
Hippocratic Oaf's picture

Fuck you!

You're in over your head!!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:18 | 4547724 matt1970
matt1970's picture

How many times has this redline moved in the last three weeks?




Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:22 | 4547746 giggler321
giggler321's picture

They move with the wind because their on the flags in the 2nd picture.  Just don't fart and I think we'll be alright where they are now.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:23 | 4547753 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Maybe horseface could put his bogus swiftie medals on a rail gun and aim it at the Kremlin.

(posted in next thread, too.)

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:26 | 4547779 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

I don't think that crackerjack-grade pot metal would keep its integrity between the rails.  In fact, seeing Kerry's face melt off between Putin's visage and that of the American public proves that it doesn't.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:34 | 4547808 clymer
clymer's picture

I like the old thinner-faced, liberal-leaning-but-tough, navy vet, skull&bones-but-can't-talk-about-it John Kerry. The newer one looks like a circus freak. How can plastic surgery actually make that head look bigger?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:48 | 4547871 Bunker Boy
Bunker Boy's picture

Kerry: "Heeee Haaawwwww" (cue jack-ass sound)

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:09 | 4547978 Arius
Arius's picture

To think this is about red lines is naivite.

These guys talk, discuss, negotiate ... thats about it. It is like trading horses, i will trade you this one for the other one etc. The key is who will be sold out to whom ... thats about it.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:54 | 4547899 Husk-Erzulie
Husk-Erzulie's picture

His face looks more and more bizarre all the time, like some hollywood doctor is stuffing cotton balls under his skin.  Next stop, plastic surgery disaster hall of fame.  How are we supposed to take you seriously dude?  Running foreign policy is serious business, not for effete mirror gazers and poofters.  You and the mocha monkey are a HUGE FUCKING JOKE... I just wish it was actually funny.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:19 | 4548340 old naughty
old naughty's picture

You mean he's shape-shifting?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:23 | 4548055 overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

who looks like the mark at the poker table...kerry can't find the mark, well you all know the answer..LOL

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:36 | 4547818 G-R-U-N-T
G-R-U-N-T's picture

Hey, is that a copy of "Atlas Shrugged" in the bookcase????

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:44 | 4547861 G-R-U-N-T
G-R-U-N-T's picture

Those in the background sound giddy, laughing cracking jokes, perhaps they know that the Obama/Kerry feckless attempt to sanction aren't going to end well!!!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:53 | 4547894 Proofreder
Proofreder's picture

HOPEFULLY they don't know the microphone is ON and we may hear something very interesting

before the uninteresting part - where Kerry actually appears and speaks.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 14:35 | 4548964 Groundhog Day
Groundhog Day's picture

Sherwin Williams bitchez

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:21 | 4547730 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

And you're fighting the very thing you and the bankstas aspire for the US to impose - financial leverage.  GFY.


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:25 | 4547772 Keyser
Keyser's picture

If Lurch were not so funny to look at, one might be worried at what is coming out of his mouth. How can these idiots think they are going to get away with hijacking the Ukraine right from under Putin's nose? It isn't going to happen, no matter how hard Kerry huffs and puffs, Putin knows his house isn't going to get blown down. 

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:19 | 4547732 boogerbently
boogerbently's picture

Should China provide military aid to Texas to secede from the union ?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:25 | 4547776 Renewable Life
Renewable Life's picture

Or Hawaii or Alaska?? How would Americas feel about that??? The idea, we are thinking this is our fight or place to be sticking our long noses in, is insanity!!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:27 | 4547784 Keyser
Keyser's picture

No need, we can take care of ourselves. Besides, Texas doesn't have to secede as it never ceded it's territories to the federal government in the first place. 

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:44 | 4547866 CharlieMike
CharlieMike's picture

Really?  You've been overrun with mexicans.  For all intents and purposes you have ceded to mexico.  Maybe one day china will come and help you rejoin the US.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:25 | 4548073 Neo
Neo's picture

Setting aside for a moment the fact that this is all theater.

Should/would the US sit idly by while China or Russia funded the overthrow of the Canadian or Mexican governments by sworn enemies of the US?

There are no "good" guys in this situation, but I would say that it appears the Russian's have fired less shots in their take over of Crimea, than were fired in that Kiev square.

Hey, atleast the US Gov. is being consistant about secession.


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 14:27 | 4548933 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

They will one day.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:33 | 4547813 HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

How can there be a "Live Feed"

when the speaker is brain dead ?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:19 | 4548033 SilverRhino
SilverRhino's picture

Of course these talks are difficult.  

When one side absolutely does not give a fuck about what you say it's difficult to get them to change their minds.   

Russia owns Crimea ... it's fucking DONE.  


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:20 | 4548037 Tom_333
Tom_333's picture

Why does everyone I know keep calling him John mean this entry aint true...?

Sat, 03/15/2014 - 18:56 | 4553092 kchrisc
kchrisc's picture

Holy shit, another hidden 'tribe' member.

"They're everywhere."


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:17 | 4547710 Devotional
Devotional's picture

I have a box of crayons for horse man.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:12 | 4547993 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

Is that the red line, Kerry's tie today? ...o, hold on, I think it's a 'peach salmon' or maybe a 'sweet nectar' or most likely a 'rosy outlook'. **

** real colors from a color chart no less

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:17 | 4547714 sudzee
sudzee's picture

Damage control and positve spin. Loosing is winning.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:26 | 4547780 Cow
Cow's picture

"Peace with Honor"

Let's get outta here...

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:55 | 4547910 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

So by that theory, does that mean that tightening is losing?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:20 | 4547735 smacker
smacker's picture

There is no truth in the rumour that Kerry is running but is odds on to lose in the Dubai al Maktoum Godolphin Stakes at 3:30p this weekend.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:20 | 4547736 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

The question to ask yourself is why we now seem to be so determined to pick a fight with Russia, our all time (at least in the movies) greatest boogey man. What is about to go so horribly wrong here that we need to blame it on them?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:38 | 4547842 HardAssets
HardAssets's picture

@Whoa Dammit - the first mistake IMO is using the terms 'we' and 'our'

The American people are in no mood for another war (opinion against taking action in Syria was overwhelming), much less one over a region which had posed no threat to them, but could potentially go thermonuclear.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:26 | 4547742 daemon
daemon's picture
" John Kerry To Explain Where The New Red Line Is "

At the speed at which the situation moves ...  new red line, very soon, in Obama's bedroom.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:22 | 4547744 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

 Click image for live feed:

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:57 | 4547919 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:22 | 4547747 astoriajoe
astoriajoe's picture

Wondering if Crimea actually gets mentioned, or if its only a discussion on gold, UST, USD, CNY, Oil, and Gas.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:23 | 4547752 BigInJapan
BigInJapan's picture

The only funny thing in this whole situation is the company of clowns you guys in the States are throwing at this crisis.


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:26 | 4547778 astoriajoe
astoriajoe's picture

Oh, to see Kerry and 10 other diplomats pop out of a mini-cooper.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:30 | 4547792 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Quite true!  In fact, what this problem needs is Roger Moore launching himself through a natgas pipeline.  I'm sorry for veering.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:24 | 4547762 OpTwoMistic
OpTwoMistic's picture

Would you purchase a car from this guy?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:24 | 4547766 The Most Intere...
The Most Interesting Frog in the World's picture

Somebody lock me in a cage with Kerry

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:31 | 4547802 Keyser
Keyser's picture

Thunderdome. Two men enter, one man leaves. I like it. In fact, I would like to see countries resolve their differences in this manner. Putin vs Obama in the Thunderdome. Ticket prices would blow Super Bowl tickets out of the water. 


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:42 | 4547864 Freddie
Freddie's picture

A man and a sissy enter. The man, Putin, destroys the usurper.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:30 | 4547797 CheapBastard
CheapBastard's picture

moar 7 course dinners, fine wine,....pleasure girls as they 'discuss' the situation....

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:34 | 4547821 djsmps
djsmps's picture

I'll bet he will say "there will be costs."

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:34 | 4548120 Greshams Law
Greshams Law's picture

Nothing like using the passive voice to get our adversaries a'tremblin'.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:36 | 4547833 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

I don't buy the "It's collusion to set the stage for the SDR" thing any more.  This is REAL.

It's ALL about the Neocon/Globalist Money Changers, leveraging their endless fiat to grab the key resources -- which back their fiat -- and thus end the Russians, and eventually the Chinese.  After that, they do whatever they feel like doing, as nation states will be broken and neo-Feudal Oligarchs will rule.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:53 | 4547890 therevolutionwas
therevolutionwas's picture

Yes, but the "fiat" will eventually fail, and then all bets are off. 

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:20 | 4548346 e_goldstein
e_goldstein's picture

Long seashells, sticks, and shiny rocks.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:39 | 4547839 Colonel Klink
Colonel Klink's picture

Kerry's red line is the string he pulls to open the next Depends he needs to wear.

Obama's red line is the train Russia is pulling on him.  And he's lov'in it!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:40 | 4547857 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

'Formidably difficult situation'....yea in particular for an idiot like Kerry! What's he ever done....never even ran a shift at a fast food joint, just married a ketchup heiress so now he's the worlds top diplomat?

This world is SO fucked over completely.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:14 | 4548004 therevolutionwas
therevolutionwas's picture

But I thank God McCain never got Obama's job.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:28 | 4548395 markar
markar's picture

McCain was never intended to be Prez. That's why Sarah Palin was picked as his running mate.

Controlled opposition

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:48 | 4547870 MFLTucson
MFLTucson's picture

What did the American people expcet when they elected Barack Hussien Obama to be their President?  One disaster after another and he is off on vacation.  WTF?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:50 | 4547879 Bill of Rights
Bill of Rights's picture

Kerry is a clown with a bad plastic surgery job, man what a scary looking FREAK!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:54 | 4547900 dobermangang
dobermangang's picture

They should draw their red lines in purple so not to offend Putin and the Russians. Red is so negative and stressful.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 10:55 | 4547908 Byte Me
Byte Me's picture

I see the podium..

..Where do they hide his saddle?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:03 | 4547948 MFLTucson
MFLTucson's picture

Hillary left the US in a disater all over the globe and she now wants to be President?  Where does this shit end? 

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:21 | 4548351 Emergency Ward
Emergency Ward's picture

The neo-con progressives Kerry Obama Clinton Power Rice McCain Graham King Feinstein will reignite the cold war even if it wrecks the world...the Responsibility to Ruin.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:08 | 4547972 djsmps
djsmps's picture

Did they happen to mention at what time?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:19 | 4548034 Byte Me
Byte Me's picture

Supposedly today. Might have been cancelled due to poor ratings. Or the weather. Or maybe Lavrov just told him to fuck off (diplomatically - of course)

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:17 | 4548021 indianplayers
indianplayers's picture

Oh man she was giving mic a blowjob and they cut it to NBC news logo. Bummer!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:20 | 4548023 Johnny Cocknballs
Johnny Cocknballs's picture

The red line, if those leaked emails are legit, was apparently going to be at something like, oh, a small Ukrainian military airport. 

Red line = false flag = a dangerously out of control government.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:21 | 4548042 yt75
yt75's picture

No sound on my side, normal ?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:22 | 4548049 Debt Slave
Debt Slave's picture

I wonder what the founding fathers like Thomas Jefferson, first Secretary of State would think of a "Dual Citizen" like Kerry as SoS?

Ya know John, I just don't think the best interests of the United States is your first priority.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:33 | 4548114 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

Kerry already lives in a NWO of the mind. It's the rest of us that are lagging behind.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:37 | 4548132 Debugas
Debugas's picture

yeah we are all so 19th century...

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:30 | 4548095 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

 Secretary Kerry will appear as soon as we can pry his head out of his ass........

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:42 | 4548096 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

The skull and bones patriarch is an elitist in his own mind.

Play the Sound of Music track during his presentation to grasp the epic nature of the moment.

All quiet on the set. Ready............ACTION!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:42 | 4548159 Itchy and Scratchy
Itchy and Scratchy's picture

In his underwear!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:43 | 4548169 F.A. Hayek
F.A. Hayek's picture

If only Kerry would get another botox injection so he couldn't open his mouth any longer.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:51 | 4548195 quasimodo
quasimodo's picture

The only thing I can think of whenever I see this mutant is the fact he needs a bag of oats strapped around his neck.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:56 | 4548217 marcusfenix
marcusfenix's picture

watch it quasi...

that's an insult to horses everywhere.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:54 | 4548213 marcusfenix
marcusfenix's picture


hey, where are the previews of upcoming attractions?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:07 | 4548229 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

John Kerry's Greatest Hits!

JibJab's "This Land"

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:28 | 4548332 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

What do Transatlantic Feminists think about Iraq's government legalising the rape of nine year old girls?

The Ukranian people are so screwed. Humanitarianism is just a word to people like John Kerry. It means NOTHING! In a few months the focus will shift to another state, and the Ukranian people will suffer under Nazi occupation. The Russian speaking Ukranians, especially the women and children, will become slaves too. If this fuck says humanitarian just once, may his soul rot in hell.

Is anyone in the front row reading ZH? Raise your left hand if you are.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:19 | 4548336 Deathstar
Deathstar's picture

Why does that dope remind me of an evil Frankenstein? <shudder>

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:33 | 4548412 markar
markar's picture

Haven't we seen this talking horse show before?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:36 | 4548425 jovius
jovius's picture

I'm sure it's just coincidence that he came out a to speak barely a minute after the European markets closed for the weekend.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:35 | 4548684 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

Did the puts expire yet on Soros' positions? Looks like Europe is going to get hit. Sanctions can be made by both sides. Putin kicks corporate executives out of Russia.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:00 | 4548438 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

The Queen's red line as been moved by Russia to Monday, after the vote on Sunday.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:54 | 4548505 zhanglini
zhanglini's picture

Russia'd better not cross that line!  or U Sam will encircle it by absorbing former Warsaw Pact countries such as Poland into NATO; then stir up color revolutions in former Soviet republics and eventually recruit them into NATO too, and deploy army/anti-missile-systems all the way to Russian border!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:25 | 4548649 f16hoser
f16hoser's picture

Kerry, Shut the Fuck Up!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:36 | 4548695 Chuck Knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch's picture

You should have sold before the weekend, dude!

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