The Ukrainians Still Have A Sense Of Humor...

Tyler Durden's picture



Then there is always the Pro-Russian angle...

h/t ArmstrongEconomics

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Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:20 | 4548035 Zwelgje
Zwelgje's picture

Yeah, can't stop laughing.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:23 | 4548054 ZeroPower
ZeroPower's picture

In Soviet Russia, vacation comes to you.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:25 | 4548072 y3maxx
y3maxx's picture

"Better Red than Dead"

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:00 | 4548243 Fukushima Sam
Fukushima Sam's picture

All this US versus Russia stuff sure gives me some great nostalgia for the good old days of the cold war.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:08 | 4548261 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

I know!  "Duck and Cover" you mooks!!

But I always thought that was a stupid idea cause we would just be roasted into a lump of shit instead of vaporized and not leave a mess.

And I wonder how well our modern computer controlled vehicles would work after an EMP bomb compared to my 1966 GTO?

Then again, all the Russians have to do this time is jam our cell phones to cause massive destruction by teen girls who can't text each other every second!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:20 | 4548348 Manthong
Manthong's picture

<<<  Attack adversaries with V Putin

<<<  Attack adversaries with B Obama

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:21 | 4548352 Manthong
Manthong's picture

<<< Attack adversaries with M Obama

<<< Attack adversaries with Genghis Khan

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:24 | 4548373 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Dude, that first one is really really cruel and inhumane..

but I'm glad to see old Genghis is still around!   Guess he's been doin well in Vegas all these years.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:34 | 4548415 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

Those who the gods wish to destroy, they first make mad.

And cutting off teenage girls cell phones is probably one way to do that!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 14:30 | 4548949 Bunders
Bunders's picture

I think the idea with duck and cover was that in the event of incoming russian nukes, the US would launch NIKE missiles (nukes) and nuke the russian nukes out of the sky. The benefit of which is that the nuclear detonation takes place further away. The problem is fallout, flash and blastwave. Given that this was the best defence at the time hiding under a table might not have been such a bad idea.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:41 | 4548153 dow jones 20000
dow jones 20000's picture

Vacation in Siberian Gulag is make for good patriotic Soviet.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:00 | 4548240 KickIce
KickIce's picture

Soviet version of room 101.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 14:07 | 4548837 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

In Soviet Russia, the vacation takes you.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:21 | 4548359 Squiddly Diddly
Squiddly Diddly's picture

Vacation is when you go away and never come back.  Mama Gump

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:29 | 4548091 Azannoth
Azannoth's picture

Visit the "Land of the Free home of the Brave" before they bravely come to set your natural resources free

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 14:27 | 4548827 No Euros please...
No Euros please we&#039;re British's picture

Yeah, rof&pmsl. First thing I thought was, visit America................

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:20 | 4548039 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Need a middle pic of a US puppet gov't, attempting to isolate Russia's energy exports.


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:03 | 4548254 samsara
samsara's picture

You mean like the one still in jail in Russia?    Mikhail Khodorkovsky

The Real Crime of M. Khodorkovsky


" ... he was named to the Advisory Board of the secretive private equity firm, Carlyle Group where he attended board meetings with fellow advisors such as George H.W. Bush and James Baker III.

However, the real crime that landed Khodorkovsky behind Russian bars was the fact that he was in the middle of making a US-backed coup d’etat to capture the Russian presidency in planned 2004 Russian Duma elections. Khodorkovsky was in the process of using his enormous wealth to buy enough seats in the coming Duma elections that he could change Russian laws regarding ownership of oil in the ground and of pipelines transporting same. In addition he planned to directly challenge Putin and become Russian President. As part of the horse trade that won Putin the tacit support of the wealthy so-called Russian Oligarchs, Putin had extracted agreement that they be allowed to hold on to their wealth provided they repatriate a share back into Russia and provided they not interfere in domestic Russian politics with their wealth. Most oligarchs agreed, as did Khodorkovsky at the time. They remain established Russian businessmen. Khodorkovsky did not.


Moreover, at the time of his arrest Khodorkovsky was in the process of negotiating via his Carlyle friend George H.W. Bush, father of the then-President George W. Bush, the sale of 40% of Yukos to either Condi Rice’s former company, Chevron or ExxonMobil in a move that would have dealt a crippling blow to the one asset left Russia and Putin to use for the rebuilding of the wrecked Russian economy: oil and export via state-owned pipelines to the West for dollars. During the ensuing Russian state prosecution of Yukos, it came to light that Khodorkovsky had also secretly made a contract with London’s Lord Rothschild not merely to support Russian culture via the Open Russia Foundation of Khodorkovsky. In the event of his possible arrest (Khodorkovsky evidently knew he was playing a high-risk game trying to create a coup against Putin) the 40% share of his Yukos stocks would pass into the hands of Lord Rothschild.


The crocodile tears of Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama for the violations of Khodorkovsky’s human rights hide a far deeper agenda that is not being admitted.... "




Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:28 | 4548350 Independent
Independent's picture

In the event of his possible arrest (Khodorkovsky evidently knew he was playing a high-risk game trying to create a coup against Putin) the 40% share of his Yukos stocks would pass into the hands of Lord Rothschild.

Kind of like the diamond trade among the JEWS honor among thieves, this is what the World Jewish Congress and the Synagogue is all about, the Jewish Mafia wraps itself up in Jewish culture/religion and gets the support of the entire Jewish community.  Great article by the way. Muchas Gracias.  By the way Khodorkovsky looks just like my brother in law, and I can tell you the guy is the biggest slime ball I have ever met.

From the article " But there was more. Khodorkovsky built some impressive ties in the West. With his new billions in effect stolen from the Russian people, he made some powerful friends. He set up a foundation modeled on US billionaire George Soros’ Open Society, calling it the Open Russia Foundation. He invited two powerful Westerners to its board—Henry Kissinger and Jacob Lord Rothschild..."  LOL OPEN ....   Yeah Open Rear Entry is their goal.  Man oh man these Jews have chutzpah, and they almost pulled it off if not for Putin.  I can see why the western Jewish media hates him so much, there must of been thousands of tribal members looking to benefit from their cross investment strategies with each other...

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:37 | 4548428 Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

When Khodorkovsky was arrested, and his assets confiscated, it turned out he wasn't a billionaire after all, merely a financial agent for Rothschild.

Shocked, shocked, I was!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:57 | 4548524 Independent
Independent's picture

Yes Herd even though the oligarchs got the state companies and resources by bribing politicians for pennies on the dollar, those pennies still added up to millions and millions of dollars and that money came from tribal members in the west like the Rothscummers and maybe even people like Nuland using our money.  I wonder how much money she has in her offshore Israel account and 'investments' made with that five billion dollars

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:21 | 4548041 tjeffersonsghost
tjeffersonsghost's picture

Que the Putin/Russian apologists...

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:25 | 4548064 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

Queue the American Empire apologists...

Cue the American Empire apologists...

America is a rouge nation...

America is a rogue nation...

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:26 | 4548076 Joe Davola
Joe Davola's picture

Married, Buried, Maried, Buried...

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:27 | 4548078 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

More war, moar woar...

"Woar, what is it good foar?" —Tolstoy

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:33 | 4548109 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

They hate us for our _____ .

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:34 | 4548116 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

Hipster skinny jeans.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:22 | 4548362 Headbanger
Headbanger's picture

Justin Beiber!

Oh wait....        Blame Canada!  Blame Canada!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:51 | 4548495 TheReplacement
TheReplacement's picture

Initiate operation canadian bacon.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:35 | 4548128 NoDebt
NoDebt's picture

Prison systems.  

NOBODY can hold a candle to us in that area.  USA!  USA!  USA!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:41 | 4548150 U4 eee aaa
U4 eee aaa's picture

Of course they can't hold a candle....they do cavity searches these days

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:44 | 4548171 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

I was gonna say fractional reserve banking.  Electoral college that obscures the real selection process.  Adherence to our own Constitution.  Binding entanglements to European finance, Middle Eastern energy, Asian manufacturing, and Latin American raw materials.  Sharing a border with Canada but not invading it already and Americanizing the hell out of it.  You heard me Canada, this kissy kissy has gone on quite long enough!!!!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:39 | 4548141 U4 eee aaa
U4 eee aaa's picture

moar sized chicks

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:31 | 4548101 hookah
hookah's picture

Cue the one side of the coin

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:34 | 4548115 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Cue TJG at the vanguard of the armored assault.  Oh right, the hawks lead from behind, and above, where they can piss down your back, and tell you it's raining.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:57 | 4548798 Panem et Circus
Panem et Circus's picture

Hawks? Weren't you advocating Bay o Pigs Part Deux further down this thread or did you just forget the /sarc tag?

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:39 | 4548145 U4 eee aaa
U4 eee aaa's picture

one hand clapping media

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:24 | 4548066 Johnny Cocknballs
Johnny Cocknballs's picture

It's 'queue' you non-contributing cunt.

What's your version - Putin is the new Hitler and the US is most concerned with spreading democracy?  Plenty of that narrative all over the MSM and comment boards all over the interwebs.

Go fuck off to CNN or HuffPo.

Men are talking.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:34 | 4548112 tjeffersonsghost
tjeffersonsghost's picture

I've been here for nearly 5 years and even on the previous platform, you've been here a year.  I'm not praising our government and it's imperialism but it disgusts me how people on this site praise Putin and their imperialism. If you like Russia so much, vote with your feet and move there.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:35 | 4548130 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

It's not praise, it's vigilance.  Marvel at the size of the bear, and the sharpness of his claws, but regard him at the very least.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:47 | 4548181 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Funny how people always equate observation with promotion. Meanwhile, they miss the entire message.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:51 | 4548196 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Nicely put!  And also funny is how the same quality doesn't apply when you are talking about plane crashes. 

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:56 | 4548789 Panem et Circus
Panem et Circus's picture

TJ the downvotes are the Russian bots spewing propaganda. Every regime has their own bots for propaganda purposes. Hell, Putin might have learned how to do it from Obama lol.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:39 | 4548144 pot_and_kettle
pot_and_kettle's picture

You can be here as long as you please with your head up your ass the whole time.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 11:40 | 4548147 Volkodav
Volkodav's picture

What imperialism?


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:23 | 4548368 Gavrikon
Gavrikon's picture

Exactly.  Crimea is Russian.  Period.  The US led a coup to take over Ukraine and they want nothing to do with it.  They were happy to stay with Ukraine as long as Ukraine was free and would not take sides against Russia.

Fucking Neo-Cons and their ass-licking apologist Zionists.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:53 | 4548769 Panem et Circus
Panem et Circus's picture

Ukrain parliament voting on joining Russia while 50 masked Russian gunmen stand inside the parliament chambers. Those elections sound almost as free and fair as the Iraqi elections when they voted in the American stoolpidgeon!!!

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 12:37 | 4548426 Canadian Dirtlump
Canadian Dirtlump's picture

The clear facts are that Putin has done more for peace in the world than any world leader. The only reason syria hasn't been bombed into the stone age is because he has supported them Meanwhile Bashar Assad is doing more to fight the "war on terror" than the US has ever done. Perversely the west are funding and training the same terrorists that they use as boogeymen to take our liberties at home.


To this Ukraine scenario. Crimea has been a semi autonomous area for years, and the fact that it is mostly inhabited by ethnic russians should be all any idiot has to read to understand that there is no crime being committed there. It's fucking Russian. The US has leased guantanamo bay, the Russians have leased the port there. They have an interest there, and a sympathetic populations. Moreover Crimea has done eveything properly to become independant. They used the same process that Kosovo used via the UN. THERE IS NO IMPERIALISM THERE.


With respect to Eastern Ukraine Putin has staed they will stand behind his people and interest there, nothing more. If the ethnic Russians become victims of violence by the illegally installed US puppet regime who have put pro US oligarchs in gubernatorial positions across the Ukraine, then he will REACT. THERE IS NO IMPERIALISM THERE.


Next time you see some hysterical neo con frothing at the mouth and screaming that Russia intends to recapture Poland, Turkey and the Czech republic change the channel.


Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:10 | 4548587 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

Yes we should annex Cuba in retaliation.  What would stop us?  Would they roll up in '62 Oldsmobiles and throw their maracas at us?  I'm sick of the BS.  Our guns are polished enough, time to act like a real global empire.  10 Cuban acres of sugar cane and papaya for each man to take up arms in a victorious assault.  Let's go already.

Fri, 03/14/2014 - 13:00 | 4548531 Gavrikon
Gavrikon's picture

Working on it, asswipe.  It'll be nice to live where white men are not hated and blamed for everything that's wrong with the country.

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